BOOKS BY ANANTA Welcome to Satsang with Ananta

It’s like this,  you are all in heaven, all standing in heaven, then the voice of one monkey, one naughty character comes, Loki, the God of Naughtiness or whatever comes and says ‘You know, if you go from here, you go left and then you turn right,  then you get to heaven’. And he’s got such a strong authoritative voice and is so convincing that you buy it, you start walking. ‘Where is heaven? Where is Heaven?’

Then, somebody says ‘You are almost there, just a little more and you have to cross’.

You keep walking and another, then another.

And you say ‘Ok. This one didn’t give me good direction, let me go to another one’.  Then you check and they say ‘You took the wrong turn. You have to go back now, walk this way’. So then eventually you meet someone who says ‘Where are you walking?’

You: ‘I’m getting to heaven. I’m seeking heaven. I’m seeking freedom’.

Man: ‘But where are you right now?

You: ‘I don’t know, I seem to be lost, I seem to be lost’.

Man: ‘Check, check: Where are you?’

You: ‘No, no, but it feels like I’m lost’.

These are the just, very real examples of Satsang questions. Just I’m exaggerating to make the point.

So what is the objection that you get?  I say, Just check:

Where are you?

Where are you now?

What is here now?

Is it not heaven?

You say: ‘It doesn’t seem like it, where is the Joy? But, it doesn’t…, I still feel like I’m lost’.

Don’t give [energy to] that feeling; just check, just check, huh? Don’t believe your thoughts because your thoughts are now conditioned to tell you that you are not in heaven.  It’s like this.

So all these examples are the same, you see? We said, like Kabir Ji had said, ‘The fish is thirsting for water but actually [it is the] water thirsting for water itself. Water saying ‘How do I find water?’

Then the Master says: ‘What are you?’

[Water says]: ‘Oh, it doesn’t feel like I’m water. You say I’m water, but it doesn’t feel like’.

Master: ‘Don’t go with the feeling, don’t go with the feeling. What are you?’

Water: ‘How do I check?’

All these are very real Satsang issues, very real; the same, the same questions.

The drop of water will say ‘Yes, yes, intellectually I understand but how do I feel it, how do I experience it?’   It’s all the same stuff.

So how do I show water that you are water? You have to check. I can only remind you that you are. I can only remind you that you cannot be anything else but that.

If some or any of you have a better way, then please tell me; it’ll make life a lot easier. [smiles]

How do we tell water that it is water?

See, the resistance is only the resistance to check. Because the mind knows, the ego knows that if you check, it is ‘game over’ for the mind. So it keeps feeding you some doubt, some issue. Either doubt about what is being said, or doubt about who is speaking; the doubt about the medium, also you say.

[You say]: ‘Okay, but I’m just watching online on Youtube. How can it be that my story ends with a Satsang online? I want to have those…, one of those great experiences in an In-Person Satsang, you know, and it should be that this laughter should come and it should not stop, and I saw those videos with Papaji and it should happen like this’.

[You say]: ‘Here, nobody is watching also; who is chronicling my freedom? I’m just sitting here watching on You Tube, or sitting on the Hangout. This is not good enough an end to my story’.

So then we continue the story like this.  What to do?

Q: ‘Father, you are a comedian today’.  [Laughter]

Yes, yes.  Actually yesterday I was saying: ‘For standup, I charge.  For Satsang, I don’t charge’.  [Laughter]

Another Q:  ‘Father, I don’t need to even believe you on this’.

Yes, yes, no belief, no belief; just this checking. If I can get this drop of water to just check: ‘What am I?’ then there is no missing the fact that it is water itself.  Doesn’t need the belief, see?

So she says: ‘I don’t need to even believe you on this, telling water it is water, it is experienced here’.

Yes, yes, yes. This is very good, you see? Just to check for yourself, you see that it must be this.

There is this awareness that that ‘I’m no distance between myself and this’.

So simple.

Suppose that there were no more words. Suppose there were no more words. Nothing at all required to be heard now. Nothing required to be seen also. Nothing required to be touched also. No presence needed to be felt also. No presence also.  No taste, no senses. You would still remain, isn’t it?

If there was no body, no senses, not even the Presence of Being, yet you would remain. No phenomenon to be experienced. Could there be suffering in this? If there was no phenomenon ever experienced, could you suffer? You would not even know the meaning of suffering.

So why does suffering come? Because this, all this play starts; of phenomenon, Being starts, this game starts. And then we want it to go in a certain way. Or we don’t want it to go in another way. But if you were to not be concerned about which way this game is going, which way this dream is playing, then it will be impossible to suffer.

So you must stop pretending to control the flow of life. Nobody has been ever able to control their life. Nobody has been able to run their life. The freedom from suffering is not your ability to control your life, but it is to be Neutral to whatever is arising and going.

And Neutrality does not mean we stop smiling, or we stop crying also. It does not mean that also. It is the inner neutrality that we are speaking of, unconcerned with even this outward expression. It could be that lots of tears are coming here, tears are coming here, but it is seen that Awareness is unconcerned by it. Many of you have seen this for your own self, isn’t it?

A lot of times you start laughing or you start crying, but inside you are unmoved. So in this way, there is full freedom for Consciousness to play the way it wants, but we remain completely Neutral. Because, in the way that we define Consciousness, even Consciousness we are not. And if this is your first Satsang, don’t give too much of your mind into this; we’ll explain this in more detail. But you know, the ones who’ve been in Satsang for a while know that they are the pure witness even of the arising and dissolution of Consciousness itself. Then you let Consciousness do whatever it wants.

This is called allowing or non-resistance. It’s not like you have an option anyway. Consciousness cannot be controlled. It’s not in a person’s control. Many have tried over so many millions of years to control life, and none have succeeded. So just watch this movie, don’t try to control the ending of the movie. Then you start enjoying the movie. But if you’re too concerned about what the next scene is, what’s going to happen next, if you’re too attached to the characters in the movie, then you’re really not enjoying it, you see.

The entire past year has come and gone in the blink of an eye lid. Our entire life span has come and gone in the blink of an eye lid. Where is the past now? Where are those characters that at one point we felt we cannot live without? So many of those have come and gone. So many so-called loves of our lives and so many nemesis and enemies and so many people have come and gone. In this game, in this movie, all this will happen.

It’s as simple as seeing ‘Who is witnessing all of this?’ It’s not an abstract question, it’s not a difficult question. Right now it can be checked. Who witnesses the movement of time? Today, we are celebrating the New Year. 2014 has become 2015, but what has really changed?

So, it’s been like this; we witness the movement of time. What is moving forward every moment, what is moving forward? Who knows this movement? Who is aware of the now, the now, the now? Fresh, every instant. Completely fresh.

Is the witnessing also changing now, now, now? Or is only the appearance changing now, now, now? Is Awareness one year older? Does it have some more grey hair? What can we say about this pure witnessing, this pure Awareness?

Like this, another million years can go. Suppose you were completely lied to, suppose there is no end to this circle of birth and death, no end. Suppose Nirvana or Moksha was a myth. Is that a problem for you?

Suppose this is one of ten thousand lives that are still to come. You’re just getting started into the cycle of birth and death. Suppose it was like this, then? It won’t matter; if you have now become unconcerned with the content of this phenomenon, of this phenomenal world, then it won’t matter whether you are in the cycle of birth and death, or you attain Nirvana or Moksha or whatever you call it. Makes no difference because, as Awareness, you are untouched.

You are ever free. In fact you are not being born and you are not dying, isn’t it? What can be born and what can die is not You. Many times, in a minute, the mind takes birth and the mind dies. Mind takes birth and the mind dies. So how many life times of this mind can happen in one day? Mind to no-mind, to mind to no-mind. That’s why I constantly point you to the witnessing of all of this phenomenon.

You see, if you believe…, if I were to give you a game, and I were to say ‘You have to now, for the next one hour, pretend to be an old man sitting at the side of the Ganga, sitting at the banks of the Ganga. You just believe all the thoughts which can come about this identity of being an old man sitting on the banks of the Ganga’. If you believe enough thoughts about it, it will seem so real to you, this identity. You’ll give it a name, you’ll give it a story. See, already it might be happening for some of you.  The visuals will come, the pictures will come. Some of you have never seen the Ganga but it will seem so real, so real.

In the same way we have built up this imaginary persona about ourselves. All it would take would be about thirty, forty, fifty thoughts for you to become deeply attached to this identity of this old man on the banks of the Ganga. In full sincerity, if you were to believe some fifty, sixty thoughts, I feel it’s enough. There would be some attachment already. You say ‘Wow, that’s a beautiful character, maybe that’s what I want in my next life’. This is the power of belief.

[Inaudible talk and Laughter with questioner]

For some it’s possible to do it this life itself. This is the power of our belief. More and more we have believed and believed in this imaginary persona, which we’ve given our name; this name, this label, whatever we are called as a person. So first we bring this imagination to the forefront, and then we want to control the life of this imaginary person. And for what? All for nothing.

Maybe in the beginning it would have seemed like this would have been fun or this would be fun. It must have been promised like this. It has gone too far. This identity has been taken too far. And yet, because it is completely imagined, it is not difficult to unravel, if you are open. But if you want to make this imagined one free, or this imagined entity happy, then I cannot help you, you see.

This is not about freedom for the imagined person. This is not even about personal happiness. There are many, many, many in the world who are focused on this personal happiness, there are so many psychiatrists and psychologists who are focused on trying to make people happy. And it’s a much more viable business. It’s a much more viable business because the person will never be happy. But you can show them some glimpses of what happiness could mean; and then they would keep coming back, more and more.

Here, if you see the truth, there’s no person, it’s not a personal life, then there is nothing much more to be said actually. So either the person can react very strongly and say ‘Okay, this is not for me, this is not what I am looking for. I still want to try it out as a person’. Many have said like this. The doubt could be something else, but ultimately at the root it could be this doubt that ‘I still want to make it as a person’. But it does not work, it does not work. It’s the same trouble. It doesn’t matter, you see?

I’ve been reading, some of you know, I’ve been reading this one book by Marcus Orelius, (not sure if I’m getting the name right now). Marcus Orelius was one of the great Roman emperors. And at that time in Rome, they used to control most of the so-called civilized world. And if you read his notes and if you read his journal; same, same trouble, same. Same family, enough wealth, security, death, old age, body issues.

So the great emperor, one of the greatest emperors of Rome, did not have a chance to find happiness as a person. Then why do we keep deluding ourselves? Why do we keep chasing these ideas?

If they must idolize someone, idolize someone who is beyond their suffering now; who has stopped suffering. Doesn’t have to be a Guru sitting in an Ashram. Doesn’t have to be a Guru who does Satsang also. If you find a Being who is beyond suffering, who is untouched by the up’s and down’s of life, it is enough to sit at their feet actually.

What’s here now? What’s here right now? Can we look at that?

Because, the truth is here. We don’t need to go looking around here and there to find the truth. The truth is ever present. In fact, I say that I am not interested in that which comes and goes. Of what value would that be? If it is something coming and going, no matter how glorious it is, of what value would it be?  It will only lead to more attachment, isn’t it? Attachment and then suffering when it goes.

So, can we find That-which-is-always-present? And if you focus on what is here right now, then you will not be able to tell me that there is something missing.

Something is always missing in experiences from the past or projections into the future. The most common one that we hear is that ‘It’s all ok now’. You say this in satsang, but what about when I leave? Then immediately you pick up this projection of the future, isn’t it?

When you taste your own Presence, then you stop searching here and there.  Your own Presence of Being. This is the Presence that wakes up. Then we call it the waking state.

What is the difference between sleep and waking? One way to say it is that all these appearances are there in the waking state, isn’t it? One way to say is like that, but the other way is first to see that first there is a ‘me’. All these appearances are arising from me, in my Presence. Can there be an appearance without a ‘me’?

So it’s never possible to have an appearance of something without there being this perspective of there being a ‘me’. Can you say that ‘I saw something but I was not there?’ No, it sounds like a silly thing to say, isn’t it? We say that ‘I saw something”. It’s always that ‘I’ saw something. So the ‘I’ must be always present.   We have to find out who is this ‘I’. Who is this one? This ‘I’ sees our thoughts also.

A thought might be coming now. A thought could even be, if it’s your first time in satsang, it could even be: ‘But this is little abstract’. It’s a little something, but it’s another thought, you see? Just a thought.

You are witnessing this thought, see? And this you, who is witnessing this thought, this emotion, this external world: this you is who? Who is the witness of all of this? This witness, this Awareness is what you are, is what I Am; and it’s always present. And this witness has no trouble with any appearance coming and going.  Isn’t it?

Satsang is a place where you can be free. You don’t have to be proper, you don’t have to be restricted. If something is coming, it’s ok.

Is there something triggering it or is it just happening? This happens very often in satsang.

That’s why I find that there is great beauty in this very simple pointing that just came up like this the other day, (and I probably used it in every satsang after that), which is that:

All there is, is this big ‘A’ of Awareness and the small ‘a’ of appearance.

Is there anything besides this? Is there anything which is not an appearance?  Anything outside the appearance, which is not the Awareness itself?

And then, if you see that all is appearance, then you find that as long as we are attached to some part of the appearance or we want the appearances to go in a certain way then we want to direct the flow of these appearances. That is also called trying to control our life, the way our life is going. It’s completely not possible. But you will find that you are the pure Awareness which is unconcerned by the flow of any appearance.

So if you’re identifying with the small ‘a’ of appearance, then trouble. And if you see that you are the big ‘A’ which is Awareness itself, then no trouble is possible.   Can we keep it this simple?

All that we can speak of must be content of the appearance, isn’t it? We say ‘My mind is very strong; mind is very strong; or some strong emotion comes, fear comes, anger comes; this body is in pain, the people around me are like this, like that; my surroundings are like this; my money in the bank’. All this is part of the appearance, isn’t it?

Can there ever be a problem which is not part of the appearance? And which appearance comes and stays? All appearances only come and go, isn’t it?

If you have a desire or aversion to an appearance, then it is trouble.

So we were saying yesterday that we are not interested in a Self which comes and goes, isn’t it? Why would I be interested in something which is coming and going? That is the nature of appearances. All appearances are coming and going. You see? So if you want to discover the Self, where must we look?

Isn’t the Self here already?

What is it that we are seeking?

What effort is required to find what is here right now?

Is there something missing in this?

Is there something bound here?

Very simply. We’re not asking you to imagine anything at all. Just look and see what is here already. And is there something that needs realization also? What needs to be realized? Only what is already here. It’s already called the Self, you see. What does the word ‘Self’ mean? You are already That.

So if I was to say there’s no distance between you and the Self, what would you do to find it? Where would you go? Would you have to move even an inch? And the mind comes and says ‘But it doesn’t seem to be like that. I’ve been trying for many years and I cannot find the Self. I’ve been to many ancient lands, I’ve come to Arunachala. But where is the Self?’

Because the nature of the mind is that it will say ‘Walk here, now walk here, now come here, now go there; one more retreat, one more teacher’. It will never say just see what is here now. The mind will never give this sort of pointing, isn’t it? And we can look together because I’m not saying anything esoteric. There’s nothing special which is being spoken about here, you see? The mind will again come and say that ‘Okay, he has seen something that I have not’.

It’s not true like this. If there is a message that I want to bring it is that it’s the most regular thing. To realize your Self is the most regular thing because You already are That.

So can we see what is here already? Can we find out what is already here? Very simply we can also look. We can say that, okay, there are some objects, there is this body, there are some breaths; then a thought is coming, some emotions are here…, and there is a witnessing of all of these, isn’t there? Is there anyone who can deny the witnessing of all of these?

Just see that there is a witnessing of all of these appearances and that’s why I say that there are two ‘As’: there’s the big ‘A’ which is Awareness and the small ‘a’ which is appearance, and all this phenomena can be bundled into appearance.

But what is the Awareness of it? You are the Awareness of it. It’s as simple as this. No appearance can be there without You. There are no second hand experiences. It’s all your own experience. And this big ‘A’, this Awareness, is untouched by any appearance no matter how strong it might seem. That’s why I say that the most horrendous or the most sublime, it does not matter. It’s only that the trouble starts when we start believing this. It’s no trouble without thoughts. And that’s why if you want a master key, if you come with a question: ‘I want to be free from all suffering forever and ever’, I have a simple pointing for you, and it’s completely possible to be free from all suffering right now.

And this simple pointing is just: Don’t believe your next thought.

I don’t tire of speaking this message because in this; it sounds like a very simple statement, but in this is the end of all suffering. Don’t believe your next thought. Can you suffer now? No! You have to work hard to suffer! It sounds ludicrous right? The first time you hear it that you are actually taking a lot of effort to cause yourself this suffering, this pretense of suffering. This pretense of suffering is a lot of work and we have been doing all this hard work to experience this misery.

How is it hard work? A thought comes and attention goes…, and I’m not saying don’t control; I’m not saying don’t give it your attention. I’m saying even if attention goes, let it go; but just by giving it attention you will not get the misery out of it. You have to also give it your belief.

To control belief is very easy. The mind will come and say ‘No, it happens on its own, it’s automatic, you see’. It’s not true like that. You have to try it out for yourself. That’s why I say don’t take my word for it. See for yourself how easy it is to be completely free right now.

This whole game has been a trick. This whole seeking game has also been a trick; another trick of the mind. And yesterday we were also speaking of the seeker identity, that sometimes it becomes too strong. See? It becomes too strong and there’s too much knowledge, you see. There’s too much knowledge and those interactions are the only interactions that I find tiring because what you would be saying is true. You would be saying ‘I Am That’. You would be saying that ‘I am Untouched’. But as you say them you can still smell ‘the person’ on you. It is the person who is pretending to be the Untouched One. The problem with too much spiritual knowledge is that it is taking us away from the now.

What is here now? Simply.

All can appear but I am the Eternal Witness to all of it. Isn’t it?

And what can touch this witnessing?

What can make this Witnessing suffer?

So anytime you say that you are suffering, you are referring to yourself as an imagined entity; the imagined entity called the person. And it is impossible for you to become this person. He tried yesterday, isn’t it? He tried yesterday to become a person. He saw that he is the Witnessing itself. And then we said ‘Can you try and become a person?’ Just cannot. At best you can pretend. At best you can pretend to be a person by believing your thoughts. But in reality you cannot leave this Witnessing position and come to the personal perspective. Just not possible. So then, what work is to be done? How many satsangs more for freedom?

(Laughter) Does it have to wait even until the end of satsang?

Does it need a silent retreat now? A ten day silent retreat should we organize? It’s not required. We can have some fun that way, there’s no harm in any of that, but you cannot show me right now what is bound. And if you cannot show me what is bound then who needs freedom? Just imagination, you see? And we have given too much juice to this imagined one, to this imagined person.

The mind will come and say ‘But, but, but, what about something?’ And I am happy to discuss those doubts. It’s very rare if someone comes first time and they say ‘Yes, yes, yes’ because the mind is so conditioned to resist. If you’re giving the words of satsang to the mind for verification, then it will need a lot of satsang. This habit I have seen is difficult to drop. Even the words that we hear in satsang, we give them to the mind for verification.

If the mind already knew the answer then why would we be here anyway?

How can the mind verify the truth?

See how the mind comes. There is a pure seeing Awareness. In deep sleep state there’s only this pure Awareness; and then there is the birth of this Being, the Presence ‘I Am’, the sense that ‘I Am’. It’s as simple as that. And once this Presence ‘I Am’ is there then everything appears. The mind appears, the world appears, the body appears.

So can the mind then go back and look at where it comes from? Can the reflection in the mirror understand what it is reflecting? It cannot do that. So the mind cannot even understand Being. Awareness is too far from mind for the mind to fathom.

If you’re waiting for a mental understanding, we will keep waiting because the mantra of the mind also is ‘Almost there….almost there’. You know? ‘Another year in Tiru. That’s it. The final Master, to meet the final Master and that’s it’. Something. The mind will always have a go like this.

Why not now? Why not here? Is there anything missing now? Is it about spiritual experience?

Om Namah Shivaya

Thank you all so very much.

Hope all of you have a wonderfully Merry Christmas,

full of Joy in your heart, the Presence of Christ in your Heart,

the Presence of Satguru Sri Mooji Ji in your Heart.

And may every day be Christmas for you.

May you always be these beautiful shining lights of Truth.

May Mooji Ji’s Presence, always reflect in your Presence.

All my Blessings, all my Blessings are with all of you, always.

I’ll see you from Tiruvannamalai, God willing.

Thank you so much. Thank you for being in Satsang today.

Satguru Sri Mooji Ji ki Jai!

Ananta Ji ki Jai!

[Silence]

Have you noticed that in periods of silence, what will happen is that the mind becomes very uncomfortable? The mind wants to keep saying something or the other. Some thoughts try to attract your attention, isn’t it? That’s why silence is so beautiful. Cos in silence it can be watched so clearly. This whole play starts to unravel very fast. Cos there is no trouble in silence. All that is, just is. And then the mind comes up with some story and you give it your belief, [Silence] and this is called going from the no mind to the mind.

The no mind does not mean that thoughts stop.  It can happen that for a period of time there are no thoughts, but truly the no mind does not mean that thoughts will stop. It’s just that the mind loses its power over you. You are not tempted by these thoughts anymore. And truly, this is the only temptation, the temptation of thought. Everything is flowing exactly as it is meant to. But by believing this temptation of thoughts then we pretend to be something we are not. Something that we can never be, actually. It’s funny that we get so troubled by the pretense of something that we can never become. We get so troubled by the pretense of something we can never become.

Supreme lord cannot become this shadow. But you can see the shadow and say ‘That is me’. That is the power of your belief. All by this little trick, this little trick of the mind which attracts your belief.

Is there any trouble beyond this? Is there any trouble beyond belief and thought? And it’s very beautiful. This whole process is so beautiful. Because you say that ‘I will not believe’ then the life tests you, you see. It gets you to transcend everything. Just when you say that ‘I will not believe’, life pushes a button and says ‘How about this?’ You say ‘I don’t believe’. It says ‘How about this? How about all of it together? Take that. Can you handle it?’ It happens, you see.

It’s very good that this happens. In the moment, we don’t feel so. In the moment we don’t feel it, but later we realize it’s very good.  Because even this, I transcended. It has given me so much strength. It can be the smallest thing or it can be a large event. It’s all the same.

So what is it that can still push your buttons? You can actually go to that now. Go to that belief now and burn it in the fire of satsang. Hand it over. Then you find that what I say is true; that this while universe can burn to pieces, including this body, but you remain untouched. Untouched even by your own cries. You see what I’m saying? It’s not about how the body is responding, you see. The body can be crying in pain but you see that the witnessing is still untouched. And the mind will come and say ‘Yes, yes, I want this, this is what I want’. It doesn’t have to do anything to get it. You are already that.

As long as you are not looking at the shadow and saying that the shadow is me, you’ll find out who is the one who is looking at the shadow. Who is looking at the personal identity?

Most of you are now able to say that there is something here [pointing to the heart region]. There is something here which wants this or is uncomfortable, or something happens. You’re already saying ‘It’s not me’. You see? You’re saying actually that ‘I see this something’.  So who is the seer? Is there a seer?

So for most of you it’s very clear that there is no person. The person idea is seen.

Now what remains is:

Who is the seer of it?

Is there a seer?

What does the seer look like?

Q: My Mom was asking me the other day; She was saying ‘I can understand that Consciousness does everything’ but she says that ‘I cannot accept that it will for example, kill children or molest children’.  So she says ‘How? Isn’t it the mind doing something, yes?’ She asked me and I didn’t know what to say.

It can seem like this. This question is there that ‘What about all the horrible things?  You say Consciousness is the one doer, then what about all the horrible things that happen?’ It must be said that it is still only Consciousness that does that. And this contrast of life does get created like this.

But you know what the best news is?  The best news is that in the seemingly most horrific circumstances, truly, truly nothing is hurt. It can seem very strong, all emotions can come. Even here, so much grief came when I heard about the kids, 130 children in school who are shot dead. It is unfathomable how it could happen.  So grief, it is natural for it to come, you see?

And that day, I was feeling that, I keep telling my son ‘Why do you leave your clothes here? Why do you leave your shoes here? Why can’t you keep them in their place?’  Any of that.   All of that we tell him.  Imagine the parents who never saw their kids again?

It can seem like all these emotions can play, but in this realm it has always been like this. The complete contrasts have always been here. Jesus was put up on a cross. The true, pure expression of love itself was put up on a cross. This is the way this realm seems to play. And if we get involved in this realm, as an object in this realm, then all this can seem too much, too much.

That’s why it is important to remember who we are, so that we see that, all of this, the best, the sublime, the most sublime experience, and the most horrific experience, both are just coming and going. And it shows us the great value of not getting attached.

This appearance, if we get attached to anything, if we say something is me or mine (the simple way of explaining attachment is just to say, something is me or mine), if we get attached to anything in this experience, this world will always show us that it will not last.

So ultimately, all is coming from this space of neutrality.   Awareness is completely neutral, because for Awareness nothing has ever really happened, you see?

So all of this is Consciousness alone and we cannot fathom Consciousness.

Q: She [Mom] says ‘I can’t seem to accept, for instance like, if you have never had an experience like that, and it is easy for you to say’. Then she says something like ‘Well, you’ve never been on streets so it’s easy for you to say everything is fine’.

Yes. But from what I have experienced, I can tell you that, I told once about this lady who was staying with me in Rishikesh, staying Mooji’s house, we were all staying together and her fiancé or her husband passed away, young lady, and her fiancé or husband passed away last, maybe the year before, and she said that this was the experience of pure grace. This was the experience of pure grace.

Closest beloved one, he left his body and she said that ‘Initially it seemed like the worst thing, seemed like the worst thing, but it was pure Grace. Because without this I would not have discovered the indestructibility of what I truly am. I would never have figured that the truth can never die.  And I discovered that everything in the appearance is just coming and going. Anything can go’.

I remember in Rishikesh, the same year we went and, I shared this story also, where there was this couple who came to satsang, young kids. They were on a delegation; young kids delegation from the United States. They were in college, these kids, and a couple had come to satsang, I was back in Bangalore so I didn’t see them in the satsang.  They came in satsang and they spoke.  And the man said that ‘I just want to be with this woman for the rest of my life and it’s a most beautiful thing’. They were so much in love with each other, you see. And then I went and we were visiting an ashram and the news came that this man died in an accident, he drowned in the Ganga.  This strong news came.  And we went along with Mooji ji, we went and visited the girl, we went and visited this girl whose life partner, (she believed he was), had passed away.  And Mooji ji told her, (we just sat silently with her for a long time, and then) he said that ‘Even one day, even this, even this one day you will say it was Grace because you will discover that what is here cannot die. You will find the truth of your true nature’.

Yes, and in these cases, very natural for the emotions to come. We are not saying that we become completely robotic. Neutral does not mean that all emotion stops.  Neutral only means that the witnessing is witnessing even the flow of this emotion.

Everything in the appearance, if you’re truly desirous of the truth, is pointing you to the truth of what we are. If we go through the entire life; you have a full life, say we live a hundred and twenty years, but we never, never figure out what we are; we’re just involved in the appearance all the time, then what is the point of such a life?

How many such lives must we have already gone through? And we have seen with the events in the recent past, that this life could be over any minute. Any minute it can be done. And if can be done any minute, then what is the best, best use of what is available here, now? If this life is available here, now, then let’s find out what is it that we are. Let us find out the undying one, before death comes. Let us discover whether something real can die.

Actually, I was meant to mention in satsang the other day about the Sydney event, the Lindt café, and going to say that ‘See, life can get over so quickly. You walk into a café and you don’t know.  Who would expect, you know, at the Lindt café, that it’s going to be the last few moments of my life? Who would expect?’  And then, in couple of days, maybe the next day itself, this incident happened in Pakistan.

There has never been in any period of history where it has only been the chocolate- flavored events which have happened. There has never been a time in history like that.

Life is always providing both the contrasts. The programmer seems to have written the game like this. And we can keep arguing with reality, saying  ‘But, but, but, how can the programmer be like this? How can God do this?’ Or we can accept that that’s the way it is; and to find out: ‘Who am I in all of this?’

Namaste.

Q: Namaste. It’s three in the morning here so we have better internet connection.

A: Wonderful.

Q: So, Beloved, yesterday I went through the peak fever, actually, of this mental attack of just feeling totally at the mercy of my mind. And you know, just feeling absolutely disastrous because the feeling of dying, literally, was so, so intense. And it forced me to even write the letter to you because we had been cut off from the internet connection before, when I was on the hot seat.

And I was just expressing that I got to feel how this connection, this sentient connection with you all and this opportunity was so invigorating to me. I even mentioned before in the chat that just to know that the love for the Satguru was energy enough to take me through this delusion.

I mean, just to give an example, yesterday it was like my whole life came to, (not just a story of it but actually in Presence), how useless I have become and how hard it has been to function. And then, of course, it reverberates with ‘My God, what is my future? What am I doing? Where am I going?’

The relationship with my girlfriend has broken up, this has broken up, I don’t have a job and all this sort of stuff, you know

A:  You are in the right Sangha then.

Q: Yes, this is what I was going to say to counterbalance it. I was just getting this unbelievable peace that passes understanding; just marinating in this total acceptance. And I could see that that was the Awareness itself.

And that I had a choice what to believe in, what to give energy to. Just like you said before.

And that the whole game is just about that, is ‘What am I going to give and entertain?’ It seems as simple as that. If it was to be given a technique it would be that, you know, ‘Who are you going to believe in? Are you going to believe in the mind or are you going to stay in the emptiness and the space?’

But there again, I need to expose this, that I am getting over the stage fright a little bit I think of exposing, but I feel now with this connection, I just worked it out that I can put the alarm clock for 2.30 in the morning and I am here in my tent and I am picking up a reasonable connection. So I am very happy that I can continue this.

I think the human element I was really missing was that of not being connected in the Sangha more. It has been my experience before. I lived with Osho is Pune and I know the home-sickness of living with beautiful people and stuff. So it’s just feeling like returning home, and I am very in love with you all and very happy to have this connection.

A: We are very happy to have you as well. So great. Wonderful words; wonderful, beautiful.

You said very beautifully that if there seems to be a choice, the choice only is ‘Which voice do I believe? Do I believe the voice of my mind? Or do I believe the emptiness (like you said)? Or do I believe the Satguru in the heart? Same, same. This is very good. Just with this is the end of suffering. Just with this one.

Q: A beloved was saying before, (I forget her name), that there is a very strong attraction to what is familiar. If we have suffered a lot, (which I personally feel I have in this striving to become myself), there is a very strong magnetism to staying with the familiar. Even if that familiar has been deep depression and questioning and inquiry. And so, you know, this merging with you all in the sense of nothingness and non-judgmental space and acceptance is just…, I have no words for my gratitude. It’s just so deep.

A: Very beautiful, very beautiful. And you said very rightly that it is the seeker identity which I find the MOST resistance from in Satsang actually. More than the relationship identity, or the parent identity, or the money identity or the job / work identity. The most resistance eventually comes from the seeker identity itself. Because the mind is saying that ‘I have got you so far. I am the one that got you to Ananta, you see? How can you give me up for him?’ [Laughter]

‘And we have done such beautiful sadhana together’ it says. ‘We have done inquiry. You remember when we did inquiry once and there was no thought for one hour?’ You see, it tells you. These kind of stories it will sell you, that ‘We can do this together, stay with me’. And we say ‘No’.

Even this seeker you are not.

Even this meditator, even this sadhaka, even this inquirer you are not.

So ultimately that’s why we say that even the seeking starts off as a personal journey. And sometimes it comes as a very arrogant journey, you see. And it has a sense of arrogance about it, even with others. ‘Oh, all of you are just chasing women and money. I am chasing God, you see, I am seeking God’.

So this sense of specialness also tends to come into the seeker identity. And then we realize that we are not even this. We are nothing phenomenally. Then something seems to pinch. Something seems to hurt on hearing that you are nothing.

Q: Yes. Very humbling, very humbling.

A: Nothing, nothing. And it is in the realization that this person is nothing; then you realize the no-thing which you are; That in which all phenomenon takes birth. So you are the full nothing. You are the full no-thing. You see? But in the phenomenal world you are nothing.

And if you meet some people on the streets who are not into spirituality or Advaita and you say ‘Who are you? You are nothing’…, it is the biggest insult, you see. Worse than calling them names is to say that ‘You are nothing’. Because the ego has made all this investment into making ‘something’ out of you. Everyone wants to become ‘something’.

So this acceptance that ‘In this phenomenal realm I am nothing. At best I am just a witness of all of this. I cannot do anything. I cannot become something’. It can seem humbling like, you said.

So from this humility, true understanding of what you are, you will realize that you are the Supreme One. But not as a person.

You see every person wants to become the Supreme One. They have their own idea of what the Supreme One is and someone tries to become God through money and someone tries to become God through Love even. But no ‘person’ can ever become God.

Q: Beloved, I have a question.

A: Yes, please.

Q: It is in regard to the body. I have always been a very ‘body’ person, very athletic. I do a lot of surfing and diving. And of course on less of a level now. I just do it when it’s really called for, when I find enthusiasm and so forth. But I have been finding a very powerful, overwhelming lack of energy. My body feels like…, I often want to rest and sleep. I am snoozing during the day a lot and it is very unusual to my normal behavior. Normally I am very active. Of course I have my resting moments and so forth but I am a little bit shocked, a little bit freaked out, you know, that my energy is just getting zapped.

I am wondering whether that it is okay to accept that as well, as part of a deeper sanctuary and a deeper resting, a deeper coming to terms with something, on a more spiritual level perhaps. I don’t know. I am a little bit divided on that.

And of course that energy is something which you need to take you throughout the day. I don’t over-tax my self with many activities or anything, which I am fortunate with here. So I just eat when I am hungry, sleep when I am tiered and drink when I am thirsty, so to speak. Which is wonderful hearing it from Bodhidharma, but you know when you feel very useless and you are taxing yourself as a tyrant, that ‘Oh my God, I’m just such a…, what am I doing, where am I going?’ That whole sensation again. So my question, as I said is ‘Is it okay to be feeling this total exhaustion?’

A: Yes, yes. So let me answer this a little carefully.

So let me start with an example. When I met Mooji for the first time, when I was on the hot seat, then for about three, four, maybe five months there was no energy here in the body to do anything at all. I would just sit around. And then the family started getting very worried. And I don’t know whether you know, in India it is quite a big thing not to be doing something, because our culture is so much around work and managing the family.

Then I wrote to Moojiji and said that ‘This is what is happening, that there is no life energy which is moving in any direction in work. There is no interest in anything but I am the happiest I have ever been. I am the happiest I have ever been, but everybody around me feels that I am depressed’. So it can play like this.

Q: [Laughter] Very good. Very good. That is beautiful.

A: So what I want to tell you is don’t make any conclusions about it. Don’t make any conclusions about what will happen in the next minute also.

So that is why what we say it is more about the beautiful neutrality which is watching as everything is happening. Either it is lying down in the bed or it could be surfing in the waves. Just ‘don’t know’…, don’t predict and don’t make any conclusions that ‘Now I am not so active any more’ or ‘I should be more active’ or something like this.

So it is neither a doing nor a non-doing. I know this can be a little subtle so I want to go a little bit slowly on this. That either saying that ‘I have become inactive’ or saying that ‘I have become very active’ is not required, you see.

It is more saying ‘I don’t know what is going to happen in the next instance. But what seems to have been flowing in the last few days is that no activity has happened’. That is completely fine, you see.

Q: Wonderful. I can support that. I just interpret it as (if I sound correct) I am suddenly overwhelmed when I surrender to this space of acceptance. I suddenly am overwhelmed with an amazing enthusiasm to do any particular thing. And this energy that comes in is absolutely incredible. It’s not me. It takes me. And so, that seems very true what you are saying.

A: And then you see that you have just been the witnessing of all of this play as well. Actually you are even unmoved by even this energy. When you are completely lethargic or completely active, in either of those two states you are only the witnessing of these states also. So actually you have not moved. Like we were saying earlier ‘You cannot move an inch’. Because there is no concept of space for you. There is no concept of time for you. All of this is just arising within Me.

Q: This quality of Awareness that you speak of, I can best describe it at the moment as a kind of…, it’s like I am inside a bubble. I am totally surrounded by something which is always here. I can feel it as a, (not to use the word ghost but) it’s almost an aura around me of total vigilance. Like a camera watching me but not judging. It’s sublime, absolutely sublime. Of course, you know, when the mind is so strong there is a sort of a forgetfulness there, but then it sort of comes back and it can be watched by this Absolute-ness. That’s how it is becoming for me.

And also a wearing off. It’s feeling like the old tricks and everything are just getting worn off. It’s getting exhausted and thrown by the side. And for me it feels very, very much satsang.

A: The first point, what I would like to say is that when you look and you see that there is a bubble around me, there is an aura or something around me, (you can look and check right now actually), are you that which is inside the bubble or that which is surrounded by the aura? Or are you that which is witnessing even this?

Q: I am that which is witnessing myself in the bubble, and the bubble and outside the bubble.

A: Yes.

Q: It’s the highest point. It’s like a humming sensation. It’s hard to describe I know, but there’s like a ‘zoom~zoom’ in the air. It’s like a very eerie kind of Presence feeling.

A: And the Witnessing is even untouched by even the strangeness or the eerie-ness of this feeling, isn’t it?

Q: Yes, yes. From this point I can see myself as the persona very easily. It’s like a little grain of sand down there just below my feet.

A: This is very good, very good.

Q: And really, Ananta, what is opening, (this is very clear to me as well), is this being on the Hot seat and connection with my Heart, with you.

And this is doing just a world of good. Because the human fragility and the love is really the bridge to all this spirituality. I feel this so strong. I remember, when I was living with Osho and everything, what we used to do all the time was just hugging each other, you know, and it is the most wonderful thing. Just this human acceptance and affection. It’s really…, we’re humans! We’re not aliens, we’re humans. You know? So, I am very, very grateful to this connection with you all.

A: Same, same, my dear. I am so happy. Very good. So much Love to you. Thank you so much.

Q: Thank you. Thank you.

A: I am so happy we were able to chat like this today.

Q: Yes, me too, me too. Very much.

A: Thank you.

Q: Namaste, Love to all.

Q: Father, can you talk about physical sensations? I am feeling physically weak today and would like to feel better so I can be productive, so studying with this.

So I know this feeling of wanting to be productive. In fact, after I came back from my first visit to Tiru [Tiruvannamalai, India], there was a period of time when…, (some of you know about this), there was a period of time where there was just no life energy to be productive at all. It seemed like, you know, I was the happiest actually than I’d ever been but to everyone around it felt like I had gone into a depression. It felt like…, and I’d never struggled with this depression thing, where everybody felt that ‘Something not right has happened with him in Tiru’. They were very fearful of me going back to Tiru.

They felt that I had this depression because it was like this entire life energy was out. And I didn’t bother about work, there were months where I didn’t reply to my emails. Then the family became so concerned that I decided to write to Moojiji. And I said that ‘Actually I am the happiest I have ever been, but there is just no life energy here. There’s just no life energy here and it’s affecting my work and my family is starting to get worried. What is happening with this one?’ And he said ‘You must trust this. You must trust what is happening, because it is pure Grace’. In fact, let me see if I can open that email, because I feel like my paraphrasing cannot match up to his true words. Just give me a minute and I will see if I can open that email.

Now, so I’ll read some excerpts from what I had written to him.

I wrote to him, “My dearest father Mooji, I love you. What a beautiful blessing to see your email.”

I’d written to him something earlier, which he had replied. And then there was something else there about Ayurveda.

I said, “My father, there’s so much joy in your presence, even in reading an email from you. The heart feels such a strong connection and a knowing. This is such a blessed time for me. The mind is losing interest in most things it was so attracted to earlier, including work and achievement. The family, (Tina and my parents), are quite worried about what is going to happen, what is going to become of my life. But I am secure in following God’s plan. I am so grateful to God for helping me find my Satguru.”

So he replied saying, “My Dear son Ananta, I am deeply pleased to read you report, which corresponds nicely to the pathways of the soul’s flow to ocean of Being from days of old. It is natural, given the way the world thinks, that your nearest and dearest should feel the way they do. After all, this is how we have been trained and conditioned to perceive life. However, as you now see and know, your Being’s unfolding path is inside the great all-inclusive river which is carrying the whole world.”

And he said, let me repeat this one, he said “However, as you now see and know, your Being’s unfolding path is inside the great all-inclusive river which is carrying the whole world. The sage’s heart remains ever untroubled by remaining inside itself as pure Awareness. He is not concerned with the world play, though at times out of compassion, he will appear to be moving about to ensure change goes in the right direction while inwardly knowing nothing can move contrary to divine will. Those who see themselves as waves and ripples will undoubtedly panic at the thought of an unknown future. But those whose hearts are inspired to rest in trust will know intuitively all things are well and will be in accordance with God’s will.”

Let me just read this one again, “Those who see themselves as waves and ripples will undoubtedly panic at the thought of an unknown future. But those whose hearts are inspired to rest in trust will know intuitively all things are well and will be in accordance with God’s will. I am with you to the end, as you are with and in me.”

[Mooji says], “I am with you until the end, as you are with and in me. Ours is an unfamiliar dance in the eyes of the ego.”

“Ours is an unfamiliar dance in the eyes of the ego. The dance of intuition. Surrender, love and trust. Your family will grow in and through your own liberation. Remind Tina…” (That’s what she was called then) “…of the peace which arose within her, which removes all the noise and fears of the mind. All this is divine auspiciousness. Trust that it is impossible to act from your Heart’s truth and it turns out wrong for others.”

Let me repeat, “Trust that it is impossible to act from your heart’s truth and it turns out wrong for others. Your family and yourself is one.”

So blessed, so blessed.

Didn’t turn out to be so much about physical sensations, but that is the answer that came up, you see? Good. This was in 2009.

So just surrender and trust is enough. And this river is flowing only through God’s grace, through divine will.

[Ananta had shaved his beard. He begins with]: Ananta could not be with us today, so he sent me instead. I’m the evil twin. And I will show you today how to be miserable. I know that every day you talk about other things, but my area of specialty is how to be miserable immediately. So it’s a bit of a change.  [Laughter]

So how does one become completely miserable in double quick time? It’s very simple. First know that you are this body-mind. Completely. You are this body mind who is here to fight  and survive. You are a body-mind who is here to fight and survive, and the world is completely against you.

And how will you fight? How will you survive? You have a special mechanism, you see; you have a special assistant. It is called the mind. So all you’re supposed to do is follow the advice of this mind, listen to everything it is saying and you will be able to be a victim forever. And you can blame the world forever, and feel special as a result of it

The simplest way to be miserable right now is to believe every thought. [Laughter] Marta is getting completely psyched, psyched. ‘Oh, Ananta will be back tomorrow and he will…..’  [Laughter].

‘But you can make it, you see. As a person you can make it, and one day you will be king of the world. Just keep going’. Should I continue like this? This is the voice of the mind.  It has many, many ways to get you tempted. ‘I am a victim. The world is against me. Nobody understands me’. All of these are the symptoms of this person idea.

So to become miserable actually requires all of this. But to be free requires nothing at all.   And as Consciousness, you can choose. As Consciousness you can choose whether you want to go with this thought-stream, or you just want to let it go.

So who is unclear on how to become miserable? Clear?

This is a good way to look at it, actually. Although it might be a little strange. But it is very good to look at it like this, because otherwise what happens is that we keep repeating the old patterns, and we’re saying that ‘Oh, this is so strong. This is coming like this. Why is it like this?’ All these stories can continue. But at least know that you are doing all of this to be miserable. It is not possible without any of this; without you doing all of this, without you choosing to believe, without you choosing to pretend.

Q: Father.

Namaste, my dear.

Q: Namaste. I just felt to leap on the hot seat today. For a number of days now, I’ve felt this way. No question. I just wanted to meet you, just to meet you. And yeah, just to meet you. Because I’m so grateful, and I so love you, so very much. And just how you came into my life was just such perfect timing.

And to be here now is just such perfect timing. It’s just as it’s meant to be; just as it’s meant to be. Because I should have been with Mooji, and I’d been staying across the road because I’d been sick and had to leave Sahaja. And then I was still able to visit and be with Mooji a lot of the time. Then they closed the doors, and they stopped anyone who wasn’t working from being able to visit, and I was no longer able to go. And I was so shocked, and I felt rejected at the time. And I knew it was wrong; but that was the feeling that was there.

And I remembered you, because I’d come across you earlier; and I believe I’d shared that this is how I came to you. And I just switched my computer on, and I sat outside the caravan because I didn’t have internet, and I hooked onto someone’s internet. And if it was raining, I put an umbrella up. And I connected with you in the forest, just two kilometers from Mooji, and started watching these satsangs on Ustream.

[My partner] was working at Sahaja. She was one of those lucky ones. And she would come home, and occasionally she would come home and catch the end of the lunch-time satsang. She was like ‘Oh. Well, I’m okay, I’ve been with Mooji’. [Laughs] But then she caught it, too. And then, little did we know, this winter then, for whatever reason, something has taken us away completely for 6 months, but here we are. And the one thing we had said when we were asked to come here was ‘Do you have unlimited internet?’ And she was like ‘Yes’. Then we were like, ‘Okay, we’ll come’ because we knew we could connect with you every day. Am just so grateful. Just thank you, thank you, thank you.”

Ananta: So beautiful, so beautiful.

Q: So much joy is coming from these satsangs now. And each day it feels like each satsang is stronger and more beautiful. Walls are just falling down that I didn’t know were still there, you know? And sure, they’re all imagined. But somehow, just so grateful. And I just didn’t want to be here and not meet you. Thank you.

Thank you so much. Beautiful words.

Q: So now I have two Masters in one.

Yes.

Q: So perfect.  [Silence, Namaste]

I’m right there, isn’t it? [Smiling]

Q: Right here. Right here. Always. Always. We’re both so grateful to you; so grateful. And so grateful every day to Mooji that he brought you to us; to all this beautiful sangha. The most incredible sangha forming around you, Father. There’s so much light in this sangha. Just beyond belief; it’s so beautiful. We’re so lucky, we’re so blessed, every one of us. So blessed. [Silence] There’s like a wish that I could find something else to say to you, but there’s just nothing more. There’s just gratitude, and love.”

Actually, at this moment, words would not be required at all.

Q: For sure.

Ananta: Because words are for communication. And what’s happening now is communion. It’s more of the Oneness.

Because the same Satguru who seemed to play out this game of one-to-another, of one window closed / another window opening, all these games being played by the same voice. But the fact of the matter is, as long as there is openness…, as long as there is openness, this true desire for complete freedom, it is not possible for the Satguru to close its doors on you. It’s not possible.

Q: Okay. And this is how you appeared. Because the door closed, but it opened; just in another form. So what did I lose? I lost nothing.

Ananta: It’s just that sometimes, when all of this is happening, we’re not sure about what’s going on. We’re not sure in those moments. But I want to tell all of you that as long as you are open…, and many times, even here in the sangha sometimes, some might feel that ‘Ananta ignores me’ or ‘He never replies to my messages’. You know? Things like that will come. The mind will play like this.

But the fact of the matter is, it is completely in your control. I’m just a servant to those that are open. And there is no entity here who’s deciding any of this. It’s just that I wake up the morning, and sometimes there are some words that appear, and they get shared like this.

And just the fact that you are here means that you’re open. So I also don’t want this to become that ‘Oh, am I open enough?’ All these questions are not required. All these tricks of the mind, all these tricks of the mind; none of it is needed.

I am always here, I am always in your own Heart. You can see this right now. Where am I right now?

Q: Right here.

As your own Presence. You see? As your own Presence. The Satguru is your own Presence. And your own Presence is always with you.

In the appearance, doors might seem to close, doors might seem to open; all of that play can go on. Just because of the entertainment of this leela, it can play like this. But your own Presence cannot leave you.

Q: So, we’re always safe.

Always, always. And that which feels un-safe is not You. That which can feel un-safe or has the story of wanting security of some sort is not You.

So, all we’re doing in satsang is pointing you to your own Presence, to your own holy Being which is right here. That is the Satguru.

Q: Yes.

This is the company of the truth. Satsang means the company of the Truth, the company of Presence. This is true satsang, to bathe in your own Presence; to not be distracted by the appearances so much. Just to notice what is real, what is now. So this external form of satsang is actually meant to bring you to your True satsang; the ever-present satsang…, where I always Am.

When this Presence is felt strongly in the Heart, then all the fears, everything, can just come and go. They mean nothing. It’s the holding the Satguru’s hand, but actually much more deeper than that. This intimacy of Oneness is much deeper than anything that the mind can fathom.

And even in the leela, it plays out beautifully, you see? So actually nothing happened, but in the leela it seemed to play out like something happened and Sahaja’s doors had to be closed, and then this door had to be opened like this. So even that is such a beautiful play. Because the mind would never have expected it like this, you see?

Q: [Laughs] No. How could we have imagined this? [Silence] And yet it was all possible. [Silence of communion].

I’m so grateful for having met both of you. Thank you so much for being in this sangha. This sangha is so beautiful. Shining lights. ☼

Q: The most radiant sangha. The most radiant. [Silence] Somehow we hope to come meet you in person. Somehow…, it won’t be possible for a while at least; in India next year, but…, who knows? I haven’t ruled anything out. [Laughs] I love you so much.

I love you, too.

Q: Thank you. [Namaste, Silence]

[Namaste, Silence]

This Appearance is constantly changing. All of us can look back to 10 minutes ago and the appearance in front of us might be very different from what is appearing right now isn’t it? And we can go back to the first thing in the morning and the appearance would’ve been completely different. And we can go back to the weekend and again it would be different. And we keep going back to wherever memory can take us and this appearance we find is constantly, constantly changing; something else is appearing. But what is the constant?

In this ever-changing appearance, this is always coming and going but there is a constant, isn’t it? What is the one constant?

The Constant must be you. Not the body. Because the body is also changing, isn’t it? The body is also constantly changing. But there must be a ‘you’ who is the witness of all of this ever-changing appearance. Who is this you? Who is this one? Who is the one who is aware of the baby-body when the body was born? This one was aware of the baby body. And this one is aware of this body also now. Has this one changed? The witnessing of that body and this body, has this one changed?

That’s why if we attach to any appearance and call it ‘me’ or call it ‘mine’, then it leads to trouble because no appearance is constant. And even if the appearance was constant, our idea about it would not be constant, you see. Our idea about the appearance also keeps changing. And relationships is the number one reason why we seem to get people in Satsang because there is so much suffering that comes from relationships. So let’s look at relationships.

Many times it happens that the other person is the same. The other person is actually the same. But our idea of the person wants to be different, we want the person to change. So in our concept of the person, of the relationship, we want it to be different. So even if the appearance was constant, the mind is never constant. The mind is constantly changing.

So it’s double trouble, isn’t it? One that the appearance is constantly changing and even if for something if the appearance was constant then the mind about it is always changing. Our ideas about everything are constantly changing. Our ideas about ourself are always changing. If you look at what we wanted to do, what we wanted to become 10 years ago, 15 years ago, it might be very different from what we want to do and what we want to become now. So if you rely on these ideas, if you rely on any appearance, then we are just in for some suffering.

The person we believe our self to be is just an idea and this idea is constantly being modified ever since we’re born’ ever since we had the ability to believe our thoughts we have always been modifying this person idea. ‘I am like this, I want this, my partner should be like, this is the amount of money I should have, my truck should be like this, and family should be like this’. Constantly changing, changing. So when all this is changing, changing, everything changing, what is the one constant?

That’s what we say; that there are two A’s: There is the appearance and there is the Awareness. Can the appearance exist without the Awareness? Can there be an appearance without you being aware of it? So all appearances rely on your Awareness, all appearances rely on You, but You do not rely on appearances. Once this is understood, then you cannot suffer. How can you rely on an appearance?

[After some internet trouble] So the appearance can be HD, or it can be SD, or it can be low definition but who is the one that is aware of it? Who is aware of the slowness, all the goodness? Who is aware that all this changing appearance is happening? Is That one changing its form in some way? Is that one going from 1020p to 780p? Is it changing the pixel level of itself? It is the same, isn’t it? How is witnessing changed by all this which is coming and going? Even the mind cannot deny this. The mind also cannot deny the fact there is a witness of all this appearance. Because if you were to try and deny all this then it will lose all credibility with you. So it wants to retain some credibility, and not deny something which is so apparent.

That there is an appearance, then there must be a witness of it, isn’t it? So the whole point of satsang is to see ‘Who is this witness?’ The whole point of the enquiry ‘Who am I?’ is to see who is this witness. And one thing is immediately clear, then the witness cannot be just another appearance, because there must be a witness of that also. So the witness cannot be an appearance. So, therefore, we can come to the conclusion that the witness cannot be phenomenal, because all phenomena need to be witnessed. So the eternal Witness, the final witness cannot be phenomenal, isn’t it? What is phenomena? Phenomena is that which can be witnessed; that which is observable. So who is the observer, who is the witness?!

So one thing is clear if you have been listening today, is that you cannot be a thing. You cannot be an object. You must be something else. If you cannot be an object, what must you be? And all that you are doing is witnessing; all that you are doing is witnessing and you cannot be a thing. So can we say that you are the witnessing itself?

Then we must be able to say that ‘If all there is, is witnessing, and I am not a phenomenal thing, then I must be this witnessing’. Can we clarify that, can we validate that for ourselves? Can we check in this moment ‘What is it that I am?’ Because there can be an appearance of anything. There can be an appearance of this body, there can be an appearance of thoughts, there can be an appearance of breath. They can even be an appearance of space. But who is witnessing them? How are you separate from this witness? What does this witness look like? Is there anything we can say about this witness? Can any appearance, no matter how strong it might seem, can it touch this awareness? This Awareness itself is your true self.

Therefore self-realization is available right now. We need not go anywhere to realize the self. This self is ever-present. The only confusion possible is when we identify with an appearance, when we identify as a body mind who is actively participating in this appearance. So the activity can continue, but the identification must be seen to be false.

May all of you be forever free from identification these appearances.

Q:, “Satsang, sangha, self-inquiry and appearance I see as love. It feels I am that constant, untouched seeing.”

Very beautiful. Constant untouched seeing, yes. Very nice.

And the minute we say ‘untouched’, that means that we cannot suffer now. Suffering seems an alien concept. How can one that is untouched suffer from anything?

Namaste everyone, very warm welcome to Satsang today. Moojiji ki Jai.

Thank you all so much for joining in. And you can ask your question in the hangout or you can post them in the question and answer application.

So happy to see all of you again. Very good. Namaste, Namaste.

Doership is still quite confusing for many of us, isn’t it? This whole question of doership. What should I do or not do? And the fact is if we were to look and ask, what can Awareness do? What can Awareness do? What is Awareness doing? Who will answer that question? What is Awareness doing? I’m not asking rhetorically actually, I’m actually asking. Who will answer this? What is Awareness doing? (Reading a response from the chat) “Ah, nothing. Awareness is not doing, it is.” Yes, so at best if you were to try and same something, we can say that Awareness is being aware. Isn’t it? Awareness is just being aware. Can it not do this? Can it stop being aware? So besides being aware, it does not do anything at all and it cannot stop being aware.

So to put it very simply, you’re only the pure seeing. We cannot even call it a doing actually, but just for the sake of conversation if you were to say, we can say that all you are doing is seeing. All you can do is see. So anytime the question comes about what should I do or not do, it is coming from a personal place, it is not coming from the place of Awareness. Isn’t it? So the question always is, what am I referring as? Am I still referring to myself as a person? Or have I seen that I am only this Awareness? Very good.

Shakti wanted to expose something, so Shakti can come on. Did she disconnect? I think by mistake she pressed the wrong button.

Marta: [Inaudible]

So, what happens is that for some unexplained reason, there’s a birth of beingness in Awareneess. This Consciousness is born inside pure Awareness. So conversationally we can say that Awareness gives birth to Consciousness, see? But this is not a doing. It does not decide okay, let me now give birth to Consciousness. You do not decide, ‘okay let me give birth to Consciousness.’ See because you are Awareness, so this concept of decision making and deciding is only for the mind actually. Everything is just flowing. The mind comes up with this concept of deciding or choosing or doing. So all of these terms don’t apply to Awareness. Because just spontaneously there is a birth of beingness from within Awareness itself. And in the light of this beingness then the world is being projected. So nobody is actually doing anything. But if you want to say that there is a doer, then in must be this beingness itself. Because without consciousness, without beingness, there can be no action. There can be no movement. There can be no phenomena actually. So in the primal phenomena, in the light of this primal phenomena called beingness or atma, then all this world comes into play.

So the entire concept of doership is just made up. Just make believe. There is nobody doing anything at all. And knowing this, the ego cannot survive. Because one of the ego’s constant question is, ‘what do I do? What should I do? What should I do?’ It sets a target and also freedom becomes like a target or goal and says, ‘what do I do to get there?’ Because it always believes that ‘I’m not there yet.’ But you are already home. You’re sitting on your bed at home and saying, ‘how do I get home, how do I get home?’ You cannot leave home. You are home. Good. No one can leave Awareness. No one can stop being aware.

So what is there for you to do or not do? What action will make a difference to what you are? You are already complete. Nothing can touch what you are. No matter how strong the story is, no matter how real it seems…. It is never true. Because nothing has ever happened to you. You have not moved one inch. Then what is all this about? That’s why we say that, even the desire for freedom, even the seeker entity starts off very personally. It’s a very personal search. Just like the search for money or relationship. It starts off like that. But we say that it is auspicious just because this is the only desire, the desire for freedom, which will get rid of the personal identity at the end of it. Eventually this person will be confronted. So far the person is saying… ‘Go here, do this, go to satsang, listen to this, listen to that.’ And it has tried to be an ally on this path for you. It says that you as a person will get freedom also. But you as a person will never get freedom. You will never get freedom. It is not something you can get. You can actually not be bound. If you can never be bound, what do you need to get? Good.

Looks like Shakti was not able to come back in.

So as awareness what can you do or not do? This should become completely clear in this satsang. You are just the pure witnessing of all that is coming and going. Only the pure witnessing of all that is coming and going. And anytime you feel that you must do or not do something, you are yearning to be what (audio cuts out) you are not. All the rest is just stories. All stories, stories, stories. They might seem like strong stories, but they are still only stories. That’s why it is a beautiful thing that my Master says, ‘who are you without your stories?’ Who are you without your seeking story? Who are you without your devotee story? Who are you without your relationship story? Who are you without your money story? See, sometimes what happens is, because we hear these words often, we hear them like they are music or something. But actually they are very potent. They are very potent. The Master’s words, who are you without your story? What remains when the story is gone? Can you stay without your story? Can you stay one minute without your story? Even if you can stay for an instant without your stories, the Truth will be completely clear. None of this applies to you. No story is yours. And the mind will come screaming and yelling. It will say, ‘but what about me? What about me? What about me? This is so real. You say it’s not real, and somewhere there’s a trust in what you say also, but this seems so real.’ It is not.

Ajnani says, “Whose story? Is there anyone who has happened to him?” Exactly. Exactly. Whose story would it be? This false one, this impossible one cannot survive without a story. Good. What can happen to awareness? What can touch witnessing? And what can awareness do? It’s as simple as that.

Yes, Shakti is back now. So Shakti can say without pressing the wrong button.

Shakti: “Hello.” Namaste my dear. “Namaste. What I wanted to expose or, I don’t know if that’s the right word. The contemplation today and yesterday has been that… I’m sorry it just went away. It’s so clear to me that everything comes and goes, and I’m the only One here. And this is a very beautiful discovery. Over and over again it’s a beautiful discovery. And so, when identity comes back… I always know because I’m suffering. It tells on itself very quickly. I was contemplating this, ‘Whose fascinated with the game?’ Yes. “And I just suddenly felt very sad because I felt that there’s something that loves the game more than it loves Mooji. (Tears) Because I remember all the stories Mooji tells about when he was touched, there was no way to go back. And I just don’t know how I could be loved so deeply and yet in some way it feels like betray that seeing. How could I ever identify again? Or even suggest that I’m confused? Or even dare to seek? And I can see that it’s a reflux. It just happens and it’s quite innocent. And I know that I can’t know even what to do from here… there’s no way to do anything.”

So let’s start with what you said a little earlier. You said there is something that loves the game more than it loves the Master, more than it loves Moojiji. What could that something be? “Just consciousness.” Yes. “It feels like the dream. Like the dream loves to dream.” Yes. And who’s feeling guilty about this? “The dream. The dreamer… the dreamer.” So even if we can say, which is true actually, that it is consciousness itself which must be enjoying this game… otherwise the game would not continue. It is not… it is the child of this consciousness, the mind, the ego which is feeling guilty about it. “Yes.” So ultimately we can say that it is all consciousness, but it you were to look at it we would see that it is the same trickster, which is interpreting even this. “Yes.” And saying it should be or should not be this way. So you say ‘I cannot do anything. I cannot do anything. It’s completely clear. Then how dare I seek?’ “Yes. I see.” I look at you and I see only love for the Master. “It’s true.” And love is independent of any actions, which might be happening or not happening. “Yes.” This love is unconditional. “Yes.” If you carry your love for Moojiji in your heart, it doesn’t matter if you don’t understand a single word in satsang. It doesn’t matter if you completely identified as a seeker. Just the love is enough. And for you, there is great understanding also. So you have been blessed both with this beautiful love and the great understanding of the Jnani.

Shakti: “That was part of what started this, I think. Was how can I understand…because I don’t know how I understand.”

This ‘I’….

Shakti: “This ‘I’.” (Laughing)

This one is not you. ‘How can I? What must I? What should I?’ This ‘I’ is not you.

Shakti: “Thank you.” You’re so welcome. Very good. “Thank you. Om Namah Shivayah.” Om Namah Shivayah. “I don’t know what to do? I don’t know how to do anything. I press… Maybe I press this…. I don’t want to turn anything off.” Don’t do anything at all. “Okay. Thank you.” I mean that even in hangout. “Okay”

This ‘I’, this trickster ‘I’, you see? It tries all its tricks. ‘I understand, I understand. But still how can I be a seeker?’ You’re not. It’s just saying, it’s selling the story again. Don’t believe any thought. As simple as that. So for any of you who are still attracted to some doing, feel there must be something I can do… just take this pointing: Don’t believe your next thought. And the thought will come and say, ‘but, but it’s so difficult.’ The thought is itself saying, you see, it’s so difficult. Some just happen automatically, automatically it’s happening. It is not automatic. It can see that way, yes. I’m not discounting that it can seem that way. It definitely can. But actually it is very difficult to be miserable. It is very, very difficult to be miserable. It’s a two-step process. It’s two steps: Give it your attention and give it your belief. Any one of these steps you don’t do and it’s not possible. Initially, it seems tricky to withdraw attention. But belief is easy. Belief is easy.

[Speaking to Marta] No? Attention is easy…. No. Take an example. Example.

Marta: “Sometimes it’s difficult for me to grasp that though.”

Yes, yes, yes. That’s very good. That’s very good. Yes, so that thought, which you can’t even give attention to, it is impossible to believe isn’t it? See… so it’s a two-step, one after another. So attention goes. But if attention itself doesn’t go, then no question of belief at all. You see? So what I’m saying is that, for some trouble… some identity, the attention will go. And when we try to say, ‘no, no I won’t look’ then it comes. It comes. See? Wherever you turn it comes. Then, at least then it is easier to not believe. It can come. But even by coming like this, it has no power. It needs our cooperation still. You say, ‘no, no I’m not cooperating.’ But you are.

No identity can survive without your approval. You see, you are like a manager sitting at a table and this requisition; this form is coming to you. So you look at it. If you look at it, you see it, doesn’t mean you have to approve it, you see? So attention is the looking at it. But the signing it is the belief. To say that, ‘yes, this is mine.’ So let all papers come to your desk and just – from inbox, outbox… inbox to outbox. No signing anything. If you pick up even the best one. ‘Look at this one, this one is important, you see, this event I must go for. Yes.’ You RSVP ‘yes’. Don’t do it. Don’t do it. Cause with that one thought, that one thought… you can come to the next satsang completely bereft of all of your life energy… just one thought. And with that one thought you might never in this lifetime come to a satsang again. Just one thought. It happens, you see? I’ve seen it happen with my Master also. Where some have got this… they’ve been to satsang, some of the oldest followers. Those who saw him in Brixton, selling chai and agarbatti in those days. And they were there so many years, so many years. Then he said something, and they just believed a thought about it. And they said, ‘no, I don’t go to Moojiji anymore. I don’t go to him.’ One thought can do like this. I’ve seen this happen. So although we can say that the mind is nothing. It is nothing. But best not to under estimate the power of thought.

So you say, you know the trickster will come with all the… it will dress it up very nicely. The invitation card will look beautiful. Gold plated, you see. ‘This is very nice’ and you buy it. And with this one thought, this game can perpetuate for another lifetime. That beautiful story that Moojiji says, where he talks about… I believe it is from the Yoga Vasistha. Where Ram is getting married. Lord Ram is getting married and Lakshma his younger brother is going to invite everyone. You see? And they want to invite the sage Vasistha. They want to invite the great sage Vasistha. So Lakshma gets on his horse. So his father had told him that,’ take my ring. Take my ring. This is the royal ring, there’s only one ring like this. Take this ring and when you show it to sage Vasistha, he will know that Dasharath, the father has sent you.’ So Lakshma goes. And he goes to the sage and he does not get off his horse. He does not get off his horse, because he’s in a hurry, you see? He has many invitations. So he does not get off his horse and says, ‘my father has invited you to the wedding.’ So Vasistha says, ‘what you do is, first get off your horse. Then you go to that room over there and put the invitation ring in… there’s a bowl over there. You put it inside that.’ So Lakshma gets off the horse, goes to the room and goes to the bowl and is going to put the over there. But over there are lying hundred rings already. The same ring. See? Then when he comes out and asks the sage, ‘what is this, oh great sage? Explain this to me.’ The sage says, ‘how many lifetimes oh Lakshma, how many lifetimes you will you not get off your horse of pride and arrogance? How many lifetimes will this game continue?’

So with that one thought, with that one thought, then you are not getting off your horse. And then it can be ‘next’ again. Next lifetime, next ring. So I say, just let go of all of this. It is the simplest thing. All thoughts are saying that you are something phenomenal. All thoughts are referring to you as person, and your power of belief is great, you see? When you pick up this one thought, and you’ve given the power of belief to the concept that you are a person. That is why we have created this beautiful satsang environment… this beautiful satsang environment…. so this you can come and expose and share the one thought which you’re not able to let go of and we can look at it together. I have never said, we’ve been doing satsang for awhile now, I have never to anyone said, ‘this is too trivial for you to bring to satsang.’ Because I can see that the trickster can work in these ways. In fact, the mind will tell you, ‘how can you bring this to Ananta? Or, how can you bring this to satsang?’ But I have never said that. I’m happy to look at this together… anything. Also, you must never be fearful about what you’re bringing up, because what is the impression I will have of you. You see, this is another trick the mind can play. ‘If I expose this, then what will Ananta think of me? He will think that I’ve not really understood. He will think…’ If I could believe all this rubbish, then I should not be here. I see you as only the Self. And I have no report card for any of you. All of you are the same One Self. And all this has happened here, you see, that’s why I can speak about it. All this has happened here, so I know how this mind can operate.

Moojiji says, ‘3-2-1 Drop it!’ It’s as simple as that. Do you think the Master would say these words if it was not possible? It is completely possible. If you don’t pick up the ‘but, but, but’, it is possible right now.

Nitya says, “Father, just want to expose that there was the thought that I am not able to connect. I cannot follow. I hand everything over to you. Awareness just is. I love you.”

Love you too, my dear. Yes, yes. It can seem that way…. ‘What is he saying? What is he talking about?’ All can seem very disconnected, disjointed. Sometimes we have trouble relating to what has been said. It’s okay, it’s okay. Just let it come and go. And sometimes it happens like this, and you go play the recording the next day and it all makes complete sense, you see. Actually I don’t know if I should be speaking like this, but I sometimes go hear the recording and I see it is complete sense… I’m surprised. So it’s all lessons of trust for all of us, you see? More to trust, more and more this satguru that is in your own heart. I said this one of the satsangs earlier, isn’t it? Where the mind before every, practically every satsang, it will come and say, ‘Today, I don’t think you will be able to say anything at all. You’re out. You’re out of things to say. What else can you say now? Everyone is going to get so bored.’ It can say these kind of things.

So don’t expect that the mind will change its colors. Don’t expect this leopard to change its spots. We’re just not dancing to its tune now. So what I used to say earlier at one point was, I would say that I’ll do the opposite of what the mind is saying. You know? That also turned out to be an egoistic thing, so even that was dropped. So no doership at all, you see? I don’t mind. Even if a word doesn’t come in satsang and all of you wonder ‘What is he doing?’ I don’t mind at all. All is just flowing exactly as it is meant to. So don’t worry about this sense of connection, disconnection… we are already one. How can we be connected? How are you connected to your Self? That is how we are connected.

Lizelle said, “Father, Nick wrote a long message yesterday on your timeline about wanting to expose something.”

Oh, I missed that. So Nick, if you’re here and you’d like to say something. And it’s suggested that you try just with the audio and see if it happens today. He said, ‘It seems better’ so I don’t know if you want to come up or not.

Nick: “Hello”. Namaste. “Namaste. Yeah it’s 3 in the morning here, so we have better Internet connection.” Oh, very good. “So, Beloved, yesterday I went through the peak fever of this mental attack of just feeling totally at the mercy of my mind and just feeling absolutely disastrous because the feeling of dying literally was so so intense. And it forced me to even write the letter to you because we had been cut off from the Internet connection before when I was on the hot seat. I was just expressing the…, I got to feel how this connection, this sentient connection with all you, and this opportunity was so invigorating to me. And I even mentioned before in the chat that just to know that the love for Aatguru was energy enough to take me through this delusion…, I mean just give an example yesterday, my whole life came to, not just the story of it, but actually in present how useless I’ve become and how hard it’s been to function. And then of course, reverberates with ‘My gosh, where’s my future? What am I doing? Where am I going?’ The relationship with my girlfriend has broken up, this is broken up. I don’t have a job and all this sort of stuff.”

You’re in the right Sangha then.

Nick: “Yes, and this is what I was going to say to counterbalance it. I was just getting this unbelievable peace that passeth understanding, you know” Yes. “Just marinating in this total acceptance. And I could see that that was the Awareness itself. And that I had a choice to, what to believe in, what to give energy to… just like you said before. And that the whole game is just about that. Is what am I going to give and entertain? It seems as simple as that, if it was to be given a technique. Who are you going to believe in? Are you going to believe in the mind? Or are you going to stay in the emptiness and the space. But, there again… I just need to expose this that I’m getting over the stage fright a little bit of exposing. I feel now with this connection I’ve just worked it out that I can put the alarm clock for 2:30 in the morning. I’m here in my tent and I’m picking up a reasonable connection, so I’m very happy that I can continue this. And I think it was the human element that I was really missing, not being connected in the sangha more. It’s been my experience before, I lived with Osho in Pune and I know the home sickness of living with beautiful people and stuff… so it’s just feeling like returning home.” Yes, yes. “And I’m very, very in love with you all and very happy to have this connection.”

We are very happy to have you as well. Wonderful words. Beautiful, beautiful.  You said very beautifully, that if there seems to be a choice, the choice only is which voice do I believe? Do I believe the voice of my mind or do I believe the emptiness as you said, or we can say the satguru in the heart? Same, same. You see? This is very good. Just with this is the end of suffering. Just with this one thing.

Nick: Beloved was saying before, I forget her name…. there is a very strong attraction to what is familiar. You know, if we have suffered a lot, as I personally feel I have. This striving to become myself, there’s a very strong magnetism to staying with the familiar. And if that familiar has been deep depression and questioning and inquiry. So this merging with you all in the sense of nothingness and non-judgmental space and acceptance is just… I have no words for my gratitude. It’s so deep.”

Very beautiful, very beautiful. And you said very rightly that, it is the seeker identity, which I find the most resistance from in satsang actually. More than the relationship identity or the parent identity or the money identity or the job/work identity. The most resistance eventually comes from the seeker identity itself. Because the mind is saying, ‘I’ve got you so far. I’m the one that got you to Ananta, you see? How can you give me up for him? And we’ve done such beautiful sadhana together’. It says, ‘we’ve done inquiry. Remember when we did inquiry once and there was no thought for one hour, you see?’ It tells you these kind of stories. It will say, ‘we can do this together. Stay with me.’ And we say, ‘no’. Even this seeker you are not. Even this mediator; even this sadhaka; even this inquirer you are not.  So ultimately that’s why we say that even the seeking starts out as a personal journey. And sometimes it becomes a very arrogant journey, you see? It has a sense of arrogance about it, even with others. ‘Oh, all of you are just chasing women and money. I’m chasing God. You see? I’m seeking God.’ So this sense of specialness also tends to come into the seeker identity. And then we realize that we’re not even this. We’re nothing phenomenally. Something seems to hurt on hearing you are nothing.

Nick: “Yes, yes. Very humbling…. Very humbling.”

Yes. Nothing, nothing. And it is in the realization that this person is nothing, then you realize the no-thing, which you are. That in which all phenomena takes birth. So you are the full nothing. You are the full no–thing. You see? But in the phenomenal world, you are nothing. And if you meet some people on the street who are not into spirituality or Advaita and you say, ‘who are you? You are nothing.’ It is the biggest insult you see. Worst than calling them names is to say that you are nothing, because the ego has made all this investment into making something out of you. Everyone wants to become something. So this acceptance that in this phenomenal realm I am nothing. At best I am just the witness of all of this. I cannot do anything. I cannot become something. So it can seem humbling like you said. From this humility, true understanding of what you are, you will realize that you are the Supreme One, but not as a person. See every person wants to become the Supreme One. They have their own idea of what the Supreme One is, and someone tries to become God through money. Someone tries to become God through love even. But no person can ever become God.

Nick, “Beloved, I have a question.” Yes. “It’s in regard to the body. I’ve always been a very body person, very athletic. And I do a lot of surfing and diving… and of course it’s on a less level now. I just do it when it’s really called for, when I feel enthusiasm and so forth. But I’ve been finding a very powerful, overwhelming lack of energy. My body feels like… I often want to just rest and sleep. And I’m snoozing during the day a lot and it’s very unusual to my normal behavior. Normally I’m very active. And of course I have my resting moments, but I’m a little bit shocked, a little bit freaked out that my energy is just getting zapped. I’m wondering if it’s okay to accept that as well as part of a sort of a deeper sanctuary, a deeper resting, a deeper coming to terms with something. On a more spiritual level perhaps, I don’t know. I’m a little bit divided about that. And of course that energy is something you need to take you throughout the day. I don’t over tax myself with many activities or anything, which I’m fortunate here. So I just eat when I’m hungry, sleep when I’m tired, and drink when I’m thirsty so to speak. Which is wonderful hearing it from Bodhidharma you know when you feel very useless and your texting yourself in a way as a tyrant. You know, ‘Oh my god, I’m just such a…. Where am I going, what am I doing?’ that whole sensation again. So my question is, is it okay to be feeling this total exhaustion?”

Yes, Yes. So, let me answer this a little carefully. So let me start with an example. When I met Mooji for the first time and I was on the hot seat, then for about three, four, maybe five months there was no energy here in the body to do anything at all. I would just sit around. And then the family started getting very worried. And I don’t know whether you know, but in India it is not a common thing to not be doing anything, you see? Because our culture is so much around work and managing the family. Then, I wrote Moojiji and said: ‘that this is what’s happening. That there is no life energy here that is moving in any direction like work. There is no interest in anything. But I am the happiest I have ever been. I’m the happiest I’ve ever been, but everyone around me feels I’m depressed. So it can play like this. What I want to tell you is that; don’t make any conclusions about it, you see. Don’t make any conclusions about what will happen in the next minute also. So that’s why we say, it’s more about the beautiful neutrality, which is watching in wonder as everything is happening. Either it is lying down on the bed or it could be surfing in the waves. Just don’t know, don’t predict and don’t make any conclusions that ‘now I am not so active anymore. Or I should be more active’, or something like this. So it’s neither a doing, nor a non-doing. I know this can be a little subtle, so I want to go a little bit slowly on this. That either saying that I’ve become inactive or saying that I’ve become very active is not required, you see? It’s more saying, I don’t know what’s going to happen in the next instant, but what seems to have been flowing in the past few days is that no activity has happened. That’s completely fine.

Nick: “Wonderful. I can support that. I just interpreted, if I sound correct.. I suddenly I’m overwhelmed when I surrender to this space of acceptance. I suddenly am overwhelmed with an amazing enthusiasm to do any particular thing. And this energy that comes in is absolutely incredible. It’s not me, it just takes me. So it seems very true what you’re saying.”

Yes. And then you see that you have just been the witnessing of all of this play as well. Actually, you’re unmoved even by this energy. See, when you’re completely lethargic or completely active in either of those two states you are only the witnessing of these states also. So actually you have not moved. Like we were saying earlier, you cannot move an inch. Cause there is no concept of space for you. There is no concept of time for you. All of this is arising within you. See?

Nick: “This quality of awareness that you speak of, I best describe it at the moment as a kind of… it’s like I’m inside a bubble. I’m totally surrendered by something which is always here. I can feel it it as a… it’s like a… not to use the word ghost, but it’s almost an aura around me of total vigilance. Like a camera watching me but not judging. It’s sublime, absolutely sublime. Of course, when the mind is so strong there’s forgetfulness there and then it sort of comes back and it can be watched by this Absolute-ness. That’s how it’s becoming for me. Also a wearing off…. It’s feeling like the old tricks are being worn off. Just getting exhausted and thrown by the side. And for me it feels very much…”

First point, what I would like to say is that when you look and you see that there is a bubble around me. You see? And there is an aura or something around me. Are you, you can look and check right now actually. Are you that which is inside the bubble, or that which is surrounded by the aura? Or are you that which is witnessing even this?

Nick: “I am that which is witnessing myself in the bubble, and the bubble, and outside the bubble.”

Yes, yes, yes.

Nick: “It’s the highest point. It’s like a humming sensation… it’s hard to describe, I know. It’s like a ‘zoom, zoom’ in the air. It’s like a very, very eerie kind of presence feeling.”

And the witnessing is untouched by even the strangeness or the eerie-ness of this feeling, isn’t it?

Nick: “Yes. Yes, from this point I can see myself as the persona very easily. It’s like a little grain of sand just down there beneath my feet.”

Yes, this is very good.

Nick: “And really, Ananta, what is opening this very well is being on the hot seat. And connection with my heart, with you and…. And this is doing just a world of good. The human fragility and the love is really the bridge to all this spirituality, I feel this so strong. I remember when I was living with Osho and everything, what we used to do all the time is just hugging and everything. And it’s the most wonderful thing. Just this human acceptance and affection… we’re humans, we’re not aliens. I’m very, very grateful to this connection.”

Same, same my dear. So happy. Very good. Same also to you.  “Thank you, thank you.” I’m so happy we were able to chat like this today. “Me too, very much.” Love you so much. “Namaste. Love to all.”

Ishani said, “That happens a lot nowadays, Father. I can’t remember what I said, and wonder if I spoke sense.” Yes. Like father, like daughter.

Ajnani says, “Such beautiful words. So clear, so powerful Beloved Anantaji. Gratitude” So much love Ajnani. Very good.

Jen says, “How do you find happiness? Real contentment.”

Very beautiful question. True happiness is found when you discover first what you really are. Otherwise what is happening is we are living the life of this person, which is just a set of concepts.  The person identity is just a set of concepts, and we are catering to this personal identity. So every morning, the mind will come and say, ‘today if you work really hard, then you will be happy. Today if you get a good relationship, then you will be happy.’ It sets these goals for us. But have you ever really been happy like this consistently. No. Because the mind says again, ‘you’re almost there. Just a little bit more. Now you have this, just a little bit of that, then you are done.’ So if you keep running on this treadmill, if you keep chasing happiness by chasing the desires of the mind and listening to the aversion of the mind, then we cannot find real happiness. The happiness that you are referring to, that is not to be found. But when you find that I cannot be this ego. I cannot be this separate individual. It has only been imagined. It has only been conjured up. Only a set of ideas that I have picked up along the way.

Then you find that all this is just an appearance, which is happening in front of me. And I’m untouched by any of this. And in this seeing of your true nature as pure awareness itself, then happiness is in service to you. But you are not even chasing happiness now, you see? Like my Master says, ‘When we chase the world, then the world runs from us. When we just stand still as the witness, then the world is bowing down to our feet. So as long as we are chasing happiness, we are chasing joy, we are chasing peace… it seems more and more elusive. When we just stand still and see what is here right now, then all of these energies and forces we see are in service to us. And if you have a mike that is working, I see you in the hangout… if you have a mike that is working it would be good to hear from you also. So that I now what is coming up for you. But if it’s not, that’s fine as well.

Atma says, “Father only emptiness remains.” So great. Yes, my dear. Good. I know that your computer seems to be giving you a lot of trouble. I’m sure in a few days we’ll be able to sort this out. Good.

Okay, so we do have a song? Ananya, do you feel like singing, or any of you?

Ananya: “Namaste, Father. Namaste everyone. Father, you also want to sing along?” Yes, yes. You can’t stop me if you tried. “We can sing Shankara, Karuna. “Father, you want to start?” This I did not bargain for.

Thank you all so much for satsang today. Moojiji ki Jai! [Namaste]

Lizelle: Anantaji ki Jai!

Sangha: Jai!

[Ananta blows kiss and waves into camera]

Q: [Tells a bit of story and speaks of his teacher Regina, Course in Miracles, then asks:] One of the big ones for me that I really kind of get caught up on, and then probably get annoyed about and feel like I’m falling behind, is this idea of the ‘person’, that ‘you are not a person’. I read about it, I hear about it, and get absolutely, totally confused and not understanding what it’s about basically. And I feel like I want to understand that, at least to a point so I can relax and keep moving forward, I guess.

This is very good. I’m very happy you say this. Because you have resisted some peer pressure, isn’t it? All of us keep talking about this and it seems like the most obvious thing; you always say ‘You are not a person’ and everybody seems to get it. But I’m so happy that you’re able to ask with so much integrity and honesty. This itself is very good.

Why do we say ‘person’? You must have heard Regina or any other Course in Miracles teachers, or anybody else, maybe even Bhagavan [Ramana Maharshi] talk about the ego, isn’t it?

So what would happen initially when I would say ‘ego’, then everyone would say, ‘Oh, yeah. I spot it. I see the ego and the ego is leaving now’. You see? It’s very easy to create [inaudible] from the ego. Everybody is saying ‘I am becoming free from the ego now. I am free from the ego now’. The ego seems like a negative connotation and it’s easy to say that ‘I am no longer egoistic’. So, when I used to use the word ‘ego’ then it used to create this false target of taking the negative aspects of who we believe ourselves to be and creating a distance from it. So, egoistic would mean very arrogant, very angry, something, something like that. Our mind would paint this picture of ego and say ‘I’m not arrogant, and therefore I am not egoistic’. That’s what most people would hear when I would say ego.

But then we realized that it is better to use the term ‘person’. Instead of saying ego, (actually, it means the same thing), but instead of saying ‘ego’ it is better to say ‘person’. Because only the rare one says that ‘I have seen that I’m not a person’. Most will say ‘I am not the ego’ but only a rare one says ‘I am not a person’. But actually it means the same thing.

The Course [in Miracles], Regina also, everyone talks about this idea of separation, that ‘I am the separate one’. So when we say ‘person’ …, person itself implies one that is separate from the rest and has a sense of individuality about it.

So we say: Where is this individual separate one?

At best, what you can do initially is say ‘This body. This body is separate, you know?’ So, ‘My body is separate from Zoe’s [wife’s] body, therefore I must be separate’. Isn’t it? That is the mind’s initial response.

But then I say: If you look at your last 10 problems, how many of them were purely related to the body?

So when you say ‘I have a problem with my manger. I don’t have enough money in the bank. I have this problem with my partner’ none of this has to do with the body. So, in THAT case then who are you referring to? Then you are referring to the idea of ‘Mike’, the person you have always believed yourself to be.

This idea of ‘Mike’, this mental belief, is the ‘ego’ or the ‘person’. You see? So that is why we have used the term ‘person’ so that it seems more applicable to all of us, rather than just to say ‘the ego’.

Now, how does this ‘person’ come into being? It never really comes into being, but how does it seem to become real? It seems to become real because belief has been given to thought. See?

So, in the Course [in Miracles] it is also said that ‘This tiny, mad idea came and the Son of God forgot to laugh’.

[Into eternity, where all is one, there crept a tiny, mad idea, at which the Son of God remembered not (i.e., forgot) to laugh. In his forgetting did the thought become a serious idea, possible of both accomplishment and real effects.][Course in Miracles Text-27.VIII.6:2-3]

You might have heard this before. So, what happened is that this ‘tiny, mad’ idea is actually every thought because all thought is referring to you as a separate one, as a person. There is no thought which is saying that you, One Being or you, One Awareness, must do this. It is always saying you, Mike or you, the person must do this or must not do this. So all we do in satsang is investigate whether this one that the ego is taking to or the mind is taking to, whether this one has any existence at all or not.

So, if you were to look and you can find a single attribute that can prove the existence of this separate individual, of this separate person, then I’d be very happy to see; an attribute that is not imagined, an attribute which is not conjured up by the mind. So, our belief right now is resting on this separation which has no evidence or proof.

Q: So the person is, you could say, more a collection of memories, of ideas or whatever comes together to fabricate the person or the ego, I suppose. Am I understanding?

Yes, yes, perfectly. So we say that the ‘person’ is only a sum total of all your concepts at this point of time. But it has no existence even phenomenally.

So, sometimes what can get confusing for some is when we talk about the unreality of the world, the unreality of the appearance; that it’s all an illusion. This can get a bit confusing also for some. So I say that: Even if we presume that all this is real, (suppose the computer is real, suppose the table is real, suppose [your wife] is real, everything is real); even in this realm of reality, can we find this person? We can only find the body, but we cannot find a person who has a problem with relationship, who has a problem with the manager, who has a problem with the body reacting in certain ways. We cannot find: Who is this one that is speaking as thoughts?

That’s why I say that the person is a secondary-level illusion. Even in this realm of illusion or reality (whatever you like to call it), it does not exist. So it’s like a daydream which we believed ourself to be. And we try to operate in this realm pretending to be this daydream character.

Q: Thank you.

This is very good. So also what you can say is that ‘Oh, but there is something here. Okay, I can see; I find no attributes of this person, but there is something. I am’. You see? ‘I can’t find evidence of this person but I Am’.

Then to see this Presence, this sense I Am; what is this sense of Being, what is this sense of Presence?

So if I were to say: Can you stop Being now? …

If only person was here (actually, it is never here, but suppose person was here). And you see that there is no person. You investigate and look. It is just made up concepts, just concepts. So there is no person. Therefore, all should vanish. If there was no person, and the person was all there is, then everything should just vanish. Isn’t it? But it doesn’t vanish. Because something is here. The Presence of Being is here.

So that’s why we say: Can you stop Being now?

Because if I were to say ‘Can you find Being?’ then it might seem a little more complex. ‘Oh, is this it? Is that it?’ But the minute I say ‘Can you stop Being?’ then it becomes clearer. ‘No, cannot stop Being. What kind of question is that?’

Q: And then you’re talking about Witnessing, aren’t you?

There’s a Witnessing of this Presence as well, isn’t it? So, we can go slowly. So what can happen is that when we say ‘Can you stop Being now?’ then it is seen that Being is ever-present. So who sees it is the Witnessing, or the Awareness itself. What is seen is the Presence of Being, which cannot go; which goes in deep sleep. So in the sleep state, you say ‘I was so sound asleep’. And there was no sense of Being also. Then in the waking state, I say ‘Can you stop Being?’ you say ‘Of course not’. So it seen that Being is present.

So, I know I’ve given you a lot to chew on in this interaction, but at least hopefully you understood what we mean when we say ‘person’. When we say ‘person not being there’ or ‘I am not a person’ hopefully that is seen. Which itself is actually the end of suffering.

Q: Thank you, Ananta.

[Namaste] I’m very happy you asked this question, you see, because many would be scared to ask. So, then ‘I’ve seen that no person is here’….,right now, you are free. RIGHT NOW, YOU ARE FREE. Without even this proclamation. Let me make this proclamation for you.

So, you are free. But still you have the power to pretend to be bound. And how will you pretend to be bound? You will pretend to be bound by listening to your thought. It could be the next thought or the next thought or the next thought. But if you refuse to believe …, and it’s the easiest, effortless thing. To believe is effortful, you see. When we believe our mind, we get tired.

What will happen is that most of the thoughts will be allowed to just go. And what can remain is the most juicy ones; the ones that have pushed our buttons for the longest time. The ones that have been nurtured for the longest time, those will remain. So, for those; don’t try to push them away, don’t try to say that ‘Now I have understood and these thoughts should stop coming’. Don’t do that; don’t resist any thought. Let all thoughts come and go, then the ones that are sticky, them we can inquire into. And those will show you the ‘section of the photo album’ that you’re most attached to.

Did you hear this example, where we talked about the photo album and the sections?

Q: I haven’t heard this, no.

So maybe for anyone who has not heard it, we can also repeat it. So we spoke about the ‘person’ being a set of concepts, isn’t it? So we say that the ‘person’ is basically this big photo album. And each thought goes in as a photo. Each thought that is believed in becomes part of the person’s photo album. ‘This is me. I am honest. I am good. I am this. I am that. I am a father. I am a captain of a ship’. All these photos go into this photo album. And then, if you were try and look individually and say ‘Okay, each one I will now get rid of’…, this could be a lifetime project. And we don’t believe in lifetime projects; we believe in two minute movies. So what we say is ‘Throw away the entire photo album’. Throw away the entire photo album.

And many will come back and say ‘Oh, to throw away the entire album seems a little difficult. It seems a little difficult to throw away everything in one shot’. Then I say ‘Okay, then throw away in sections’. And what are the sections? Each portion of our identity, we have a few key aspects to our identity; it could be father identity, it could be work identity, it could be partner identity. All of us feel like we’re very evolved, complex Beings but actually we have just four or five key sections which are common to most people. So what we say is ‘Throw it away section by section’. Just throw it away section by section.

So, what is the connection between sticky thoughts? The sticky thoughts will point us to the sections which are the strongest attachments for us. There will be some portion of the identity which is the strongest, stickiest thing which still hangs on. So basically what it means is you are saying that ‘I know that there is no person here. I’ve seen; there’s just a set of concepts. Just a set of concepts. But worker identity? But I’m still a worker’. You see? Basically, that’s what’s happening; that there’s this contradiction.

Or the mind will create a separation. It will say ‘Okay, all this is fine for satsang, but when you come to the [quote, unquote] real world, then you have to steer your ship. You-as-a-person has to do something’. It is not true. The person cannot do anything because it does not exist.

Does this mean that action will stop? It will not stop. The same One which has been doing it all along will continue to do it.

So the person is always ‘post facto’ you see. A thought comes, and we say ‘It was my thought’. In the same way, action happens and we say ‘It was my action’. That’s why we’ve taken it from the root and chopped it off.

If you refuse to believe your next thought, then none of this you even need to understand separately, you see? Doership, choice, free will; that can take many lifetimes to understand. Then you have other concepts, you know? It could just be about Being or Awareness or all of that. So we say, keeping it very simply: Just become free from your suffering. That is what is critical, what is important right now, is to just let go of these thoughts; and all the knowledge, all the insights will flow on their own. There is no way that this knowledge will be kept from you if you are free from suffering.

So it is as simple as saying: You cannot suffer without believing your next thought.

Even when strong …, they say chemical reactions, you see…, something is happening in the body and some moods seem to come, some darkness seems to come; unless we are believing a thought about it, it will just come and go. It will all come and go, and you will find that you were untouched by this play of darkness and light.

But if you say ‘Okay, now I’ve been in satsang but still the darkness is coming; it is not working’ and you start resisting it like this, in that you give it power, you give it more reality.

Let all just come and go. You are the untouched witness of all of it.

[Silence]

Q: Thank you, Thank you, Thank you.

[Smile and Namaste]

Namaste everyone, very warm welcome to Satsang today. Moojiji ki Jai.

Thank you all so much for joining in. And again I’m a little early because we have multiple things to set up these days.

Amaya says Namaste. Namaste my dear.

Denan you’re here. Namaste. Would you like to share something?

Denan: Hi, Namaste. No questions, just wanted to be here. Wonderful, so wonderful you’re here.

So what’s happening, no one else wants to come in? [Live on the Interactive Video screen]. We’ve had enough of the hangout.

This very moment is the end, you see? The end of all seeking. The end of all desire. The end of all aversion. Unless you choose otherwise. So as consciousness, it is completely up to you. As a person nothing is up to you, but as Being all of this play is completely up to you. There is actually nothing else any of you need to hear. No other deepening is required. No other experience is required. Many of us are still waiting for the awakening experience. The liberation experience. But liberation is not an experience. Yes sometimes we can call awakening an experience. But the value of the awakening is not in the experience. In the clear seeing that I have always been this. So we can stop looking for any experience. And when we don’t look for any experience, then what remains? We can stop looking for anything if our eyes don’t have this grasping energy about themselves, then what remains. And what will happen when you look at others, when you look at their eyes you will be able to sense whether they carry an acceptance or whether they carry a need. And this will not be a judgment, it will be a seeing. The ability to see this. You see?

So this is like the famous example of this one who told Mooji that… when Mooji asked him, ‘What is looking from behind these eyes?’ He said, and I was there in Tiru when this happened. He said, ‘It is conditioning.’ You see? And when you say it is conditioning looking from behind these eyes, it means there is a sense of need. A sense of what’s in it for me. We say that the ego’s mantra is ‘What’s in it for me?’ And everything we’re looking at, we’re saying ‘Is there something in it for me, or not.’ And when we identify that there’s something in it for me, then that’s also not enough. We say, ‘me first’ or ‘me alone.’ If this question was to completely go away, ‘What’s in it for me?’ then how would our experience of the world be? And this question is very pervasive, you know, we don’t even realize it. If somebody calls us in our mind we are worrying, why is he calling me. If somebody comes to our house, it’s the same. Why is he taking so much of my time? What’s in this for me? Can we operate without this me? Without this concept of me? And even for satsang we can say these things like this, isn’t it? We say this. Like now I’ve heard enough. There’s nothing left in satsang for ‘me’. Actually for this ‘me’, there was never anything in satsang. So whose eyes are we looking from?

Namaste, hello my dear. Hello. So nice to meet you. [Ananta says hi to Vivi’s daughter] Very beautiful. Welcome to satsang my dear. Yes, I am also making faces… you are also making faces. My daughter is in school, otherwise she would have loved to meet you I’m sure.

Ishani says, “Father, can I come on to the hot seat?”

Ishani: “Namaste Father.” Namaste my dear. “I don’t have a question Father, but I just wanted to share. So when the last time I was asking you if I should make an effort to kind of do something because I wasn’t feeling to do anything. So now I think I kind of see why you said ‘no’, because I think that whatever, as in the things that has to unfold, it just will. There’s nothing that anybody here needs to be like pushing or pulling or thinking about it all. It’s just I wasn’t used to this emptiness I think.” Yes. “Like Moojiji says, you have to get used to it. So I wasn’t used to it. It was just unfamiliar I think. But now I felt hat it’s not even that an energy has to come back. It’s just that whatever has to unfold it just will, right?” Absolutely. “So that one which was trying to figure it out I think is… I can actually see that one, actually.” Yes. “And even that trying to be a certain way, like peaceful, and all those things I can see so clearly now. Anything can come now. I mean it may not always be perfect or spiritual or anything of that sort. It doesn’t touch this emptiness, I think.”

Absolutely. Absolutely. So effort was only a pretense, you see? “Yeah.”  The one who was doing was only the same imagined one. All has always been unfolding on its own. And it’s not after spirituality or after realizing who we are that this change is like this. This has always been this way. We only pretend as if we were doing something, and then we realize that I never did anything at all. That’s why we say, surrender is not a doing, but it is a realization that it has always been this way. “Yes, Father. I’m still just staying quiet and not being too quick on making any final kind of statements because it’s still very new I think.” Yes. Even the quiet you’re not doing, you see? “Yes.” And even if some proclamation was to come, it will not be yours. “Yes.” But there will be this voice, which will now want to proclaim a lot. But we have let go of this voice now. The voice that was pretending to do anything at all has now been left behind. “Yes.” Because the interpreter started believing that it is the main speaker. The translator or the interpreter started believing that he is the main speaker. Beingness is everything. Beingness is experiencing everything. But the mind took on this position and started pushing for your belief. But the crime mystery is how the doer himself got confused and said that it is this voice who is the doer.

Ishani: “Yeah. And I think that there was like, this one…. I think I was getting caught in this place where things were going on expanding and new revelations kept happening, but then there is that place where nothing is happening. So I think I was getting caught in that place of ‘wow, wow, wow’. Such new things are happening, such new insights, more and more insights. But then actually it’s so simple. That place where nothing is happening is so simple. And anything can happen, it doesn’t have to be ‘wow’ or anything. It’s just ordinary.”

So there will still be fresh insights that come. And there will be periods of time where it seems like nothing is happening. And you are not concerned about either. Because the witnessing is unaffected by any of this. So when something comes, this sense of wonder can still be there. And wonder will come and wonder will also go. And as long as nothing is an expectation, then all is very good.

Ishani: “Whatever is there, I want to surrender everything. I don’t know if there is, but I just want to surrender everything at your feet.” Very good. So much love. “Thank you.” [Ananta blows kisses].

Naomi says, “Namaste, so nice to hear and see you all. I’m hoping to get on live soon, when the body is better.” Hope the body becomes better soon my dear. So much love to you.

Okay, let me quickly jump onto Ustream and let me see if there are any messages. Jayani had said, “Father, can I come onto the hot seat?” Yes, of course my dear.

Jayani: “Namaste Father, can you hear me? Last night when, sorry I’m shaking.” It’s okay, take your time. “Pardon?” Take your time. “Last night when I was… you know what’s going to happen? As I get on, my children are going to come in. As I was listening to Shakti’s broadcast and she was reading the Ashtavakra Gita… there is just seeing that the mind doesn’t even exist. Like, so much of what was seen was seen even from the position of this idea in this dream, awakening. But actually there is no mind, there is no one to awaken.” Yes, yes. “And um, I can’t, I don’t know how to even…. This person isn’t even…. Like previously it was known, but it was known by the person.”

Yes, completely. There used to be this person. So the seeking, the seeker also started off as a personal identity, didn’t it? It is the person that wanted freedom. Freedom was the next target, the next goal for this person. So even the desire for freedom started as a personal search. But this is the only desire, which at the end leaves the person as well. This is the only desire that if it comes to its true culmination, then the person will also be dropped. In many instances what may happen is that the person says, ‘I am free’ and it starts to believe it, you see? And that is called the spiritual ego. The person feels that I separately am now free. You are not free, but I am free. That is the spiritual ego. Freedom only means to see that there was never a person here. Hence, all of us are the Self alone.

Jayani: “It was always seen and there was a nothingness, but I can’t put it into words. It’s like… there were realizations and falling away and experiences, but it was always as if there was some kind of a mind. But there’s no mind…. There’s just nothing.”

Yes. So what was happening is it’s the mind’s habit to work in this way. A thought appears and then we say, ‘It was my thought.’ The same way an experience comes, even it could be an awakening experience, and then we say it was ‘my awakening.’ You see? The minute we call it mine, then it becomes trouble.

Jayani: “I can’t even really speak, Father.” Very good. “Just so grateful.

We have all these scriptures being read. The Ashtavakra Gita; Shakti was reading it, and some insight can come like this. The words of these scriptures are so powerful and so beautiful.

Jayani: “And it was seen that there was still an interest in the play; still an investment in the play particularly children and motherhood. And enjoying that aspect of the play, but it’s just not true. It’s just not real. There’s just not anybody having that perception, and yet there’s still a sense of a person having that perception, but that’s still just part of the play.”

Yes. So the play can be enjoyed, but as an audience member, you see? “Yeah.” If we start believing that we are the character in the play, then it is a different sort of play. This is also your own play. To pretend to be the character in the play is also your own play, but then when you start suffering too much in this character role then you say, ‘Okay, I just want to be the audience.’ And in that also there is some enjoyment, and that’s why maybe it continues. The appearance can continue to come and go. It cannot happen without consciousness. So when you see yourself as the witness or the audience of the play, then no problem. When we start identifying as a character within the play, then all the trouble starts.

Jayani: “It’s funny Father, I don’t even see myself as a witness, its just nothing.”

Yes. It’s very good you say this because many times when I say witness, we imagine a witness entity. But there is no entity, which is the witness. It is witnessing itself, which is here. For beginners in satsang we can say that ‘First be the witness. Come to your witnessing position. Be the witness.’ And then we say, ‘is this witness also real? Is there an entity there who is the witness? Who does witnessing belong to?’ To nobody. Awareness is not a thing, it is not an entity. So when you say that even this witness is not there, it is completely true. And yet witnessing is ever present. Now the mind will come in and it will say, ‘Now you got it’, you see? What it is basically saying is that, ‘I got it’ and you must not believe that thought also.

Jayani: “Because there’s been experiences of seeing on so many occasions, but something… I don’t know, I can’t even evaluate.”

Yes. The one who is coming to take ownership of the seeing, that is completely non-existent and untrue. “Absolutely. Absolutely, absolutely.”

[Jayani talking to her daughter] “Can you say hello?” Hello my dear. “Say hello. Om Namah Shivah.”  ‘Om Namah Shivayah’. Om Namah Shivayah, so sweet. Very good.

Jayani: “Thank you Father. Thank you. Thank you so much. And I place everything in this fire and just say thank you, thank you, thank you. Yes, yes, yes.” You’re welcome. “Thank you Father. Thank you Father. Thank you Shakti.” Thank you.

Marta has a question.

Marta: “When you said ‘the mind doesn’t exist’…” Yes. “It’s very difficult for me to follow….”

To follow that the mind doesn’t exist. So, let’s look at it. What is the mind? When there is thought, we say there is the mind. When there is no thought, we say there is no mind. Isn’t it? Zen Buddhists also say the no mind state means no thought. It’s all clear. But there is a witnessing of mind and witnessing of also of no mind. There is a witnessing of thought and a witnessing of no thought. You are there to say mind was noisy or mind was completely quiet. You see? The witnessing is present there to say that. So the mind is what? The mind is only a bundle of all of these thoughts. Thoughts, memories… yeah it’s only as this. Only as this energetic coming up and going. You see? Comes from nothing, goes back into nothing. That is the only way it is presumed to be seen. It’s not… it doesn’t have any tangible entity about itself. It’s not like a person sitting somewhere really and saying… It only pretends, it’s only the voice. With that voice gives it more power, it seems to make it real. But when we keep that distance, we don’t believe it, then it’s just……

Marta: When you say don’t exist?

Yes, yes. The appearance comes and goes, yes. So nobody is denying that it does not appear and disappear. We are only saying that it doesn’t have any substance. Only this (makes gesture with his hand of coming and going). You see? It’s like smoke, you see, it is there… there’s nothing. You can’t hold onto it. Very good.

Wow, there’s a lot of chat. Yes.

Kapil says, “A thought just came here. What if we could have a webpage or document where we have a list of most common statements that the imagined one tries to trick us with?” Yes, this is very nice. Yes. “It will help us all see that the imagined one has these limited concepts where it tries to trick everybody.” This is very good. In fact, there was a satsang where Amaya or maybe Aradhana or somebody in the satsang team can remember where we looked at many of these tricks. This is very good. Common ego tricks. Very good.

Observe what happens when there is silence. When there is silence, then the mind starts staying ‘what’s going on?’ It feels unsteady, uncomfortable… but you will all get used to this silence. And then even the words, which are arising, will not seem to break this silence. They will seem to just be apart of the silence itself. Nothing can disturb your silence then.

[A few minutes of Silence]

If this is not freedom, then what must freedom be? Every time we buy a story about freedom, we pretend to be bound.

Let’s have the audio on for Zoe; let’s see what’s happening there.

Zoe: (Laughing). “Nothing, nothing, nothing. What else could it be? What else is there? There is nothing else, but this. (Laughing). Nothing. Nothing. (Laughing). Ah, it’s so beautiful. So perfect. Thank you.”

So much wanting freedom, wanting freedom… that we don’t recognize it when it is already here. Who can look at this one and say she is not free?

Zoe: Everywhere I look, there’s nothing but freedom. Everywhere. I can’t look in a single direction and find ‘not freedom’, it’s everywhere. It’s everywhere. It’s all there is.

Yes, this is freedom, you see? It can never be that I can say that freedom is here, but it is not there. It cannot be. Freedom means to see that it is all freedom. To see that no bondage ever was real. Which thought will we pick up now?

Zoe: Well that would be freedom too, so that doesn’t matter. “Ah, she’s policing me now. “No, no no. No, never. No. (Laughing). No badge here, no badge.” Did we lose the audio? And the video too? (Audio and video back). “I’m back.” She has the complete freedom to switch it off if she wants too. “I’m back.”

This is very good. You see, this question I feel is very important. To ask, ‘If this is not freedom, than what is?’ At the least it will expose our painting of what freedom is. Our concept of what freedom is. And for many of us, we still believe that freedom is (audio cuts out), some state like that. Or something else… whatever picture the mind has painted, but it’s none of those states. There is nowhere we have to get to, there is no experience we need to have. Because all experiences have a best before date, you see? All experiences have an ‘expire’ date. We spoke about this earlier as well, you see? The best music, you love it. How many times do you hear it? You hear it one hundred times… you hear it one full day and then the next day if you put it on… ‘Quiet, quiet, I want some quiet.’ The best food, how much? The best sensation…. The best sex. How much sex can you have? Every experience has its limitation, and if freedom was an experience than it would be limited by these senses again. If freedom was a state, then it would be limited like this.

So once this contemplation came to me that, ‘what would heaven be like? If there is a heaven, then what would it be like? I would say, best music. These angels playing there, what are they, harps. What are they? The harps. How long will you hear them? The best food, but how much of that you want? What will be heaven? So heaven is here right now. In this beautiful neutrality is heaven, because neutrality does not care about experience. All is welcome. There is no resistance. But in our wanting a particular state, in our wanting something… we make this heaven into hell. In our wanting or wanting to not have something. Wanting to resist something…. Either. That’s why acceptance is the neutrality that we speak about. And acceptance does not mean that no movement will now happen through the body. Actions will also still continue. So it’s neither a doing or a non doing. So I can tell you all this. You are free now. You are free now. All of you. On Ustream, on Hangout and on YouTube. All of you are free now. But you, some of you will pretend to be bound by believing a thought that will come. But if you refuse to believe, then you cannot even pretend to be bound. And that’s why satsang becomes mostly about, ‘It was clear. Freedom was there. But, then…’ You see?

I read something very beautiful that Byron Katie had posted on Facebook. ‘Being a believer is very exhausting.’ You get very tired believing all these concepts and ideas. So maybe my only question should be, so what did you believe? Between yesterday’s satsang and today’s satsang, what did you believe? Which thought did you pick up? I can give you all freedom certificates right now. What conditions apply, you see? And the condition apply means, conditional to you not believing your next thought. And it could be now the most glorious thoughts, you see, the most glorious ones. “Now I am God. Now I am completely free.’ Even these thoughts have no meaning for you. And life will push all your buttons. This one…. now this one… try to ignore this one if you can. All the buttons will be pushed, and that is Grace. And that is Grace. Even this switching from Ustream to Hangout has been pushing so many buttons, I know that. But all of you are managing so beautifully, so gracefully. All the feelings… especially those who are not able to get into the Hangout, are also getting these feelings of being left out again, you see? This is a familiar feeling. This familiar fear of being left out. But I see that, although frustration might come for a few minutes, then everything is seen as nothing, nothing, nothing. So life knows exactly what it is doing. And it has perfect timing.

Labode says, “I surrender this unwillingness to surrender my desire for my work to be very successful, and helping many. I surrender my sense of self-importance and ‘little me’ doing the work.” This is very good.

In some cultures, especially in India we have this strong conditioning about work. You see, if you meet people many will ask you, ‘So what do you do? What’s your work?’ In many cultures it’s a question which is a little private, so not everybody says. At least not in the first meeting. But in India typically what happens is first question that people ask is, ‘What do you do?’ And even with me what happens now is there are friends on Facebook who know me from work. So they’re like ‘So have you become fully now Baba, you have no work? You will do only satsang?’ Or then they’ll say, ‘So how do you balance?’ Because work seems to be such an important part of identity, especially in some cultures. That’s why I’m very happy to read this. You say, ‘I surrender my desire for my work to be very successful.’ This is very good. So see that there is no one here. The worker identity is also being surrendered now. Good. Very good.

Naomi says, “Dearest Anantaji. Third virus in nearly three months has afflicted this body and illness is usually attached to fear. I notice I attempt to drop the thoughts and strong fear vibrations remain anyway.”

We actually cannot predict why these things sometimes happen. Sometimes there has been a lot which has been held inside and when it is getting released then it can feel like it is manifesting in these strong sensations. Jayani was saying earlier that body is vibrating. Sometimes illness. You see Mooji has even coined a term for it. He calls it ‘satsang fever.’ And inevitably, in silent intensives many, many illnesses will come. Once there was a time where Garima attended the silent intensive, and half the silent intensive everyone got diarrhea, in Tiruvannamalai. And they even laid out beds in the satsang hall. Moojiji had said you cannot miss satsang, even if you are suffering terribly. So we organized beds in the satsang hall. And people would just come and lie in the presence of satsang.

So it is not uncommon for this kind of satsang fever to come, you see? But I am always very clear to say that this body is like an instrument that we have. It’s like a car. We say this often, isn’t it? So if the car needs a mechanic, no problem. Go to a mechanic. We should also not have this belief that, ‘Oh, now I’m free. Now I’m spiritual. My body should not get sick.’ That’s another expectation or condition, isn’t it? And life will push that button also…. ‘See you thought you were free. But look at this body, where it’s going.’ So if the car needs a mechanic, go to a mechanic. Just don’t say that the car is me. That is the only problem. You see? You will not say, ‘my car should not break down now, I’m spiritual.’ But why we say ‘body should not break down now that I’m spiritual.’ That still would expose that there is some body identification. This is very good. Satsang fever is very, very common. Then go with your intuition, you see? Intuition will tell you whether something needs to go to a doctor or whether it’s alright. All my blessings are with you. May your body be completely fine in double quick time.

Atma says, “Super great satsang. We are always free now. Only now is.” Very good.

Clare…, if Clare has a question you can try to unmute your mic and say.

Clare: “Hello, hello.” Namaste, hello. “Namaste. I just keep labeling. And the person in me keeps going on and on about pointlessness.”

I can tell you a story. For a long time, when I was growing up. And what was happening in India was that this whole information technology revolution was happening. You see, software…. software industry. And my family comes from this software IT background. So there was this feeling that one day I want to own a software IT company. So a lot of my childhood went in this dream. I felt that once I have a software company that I’m done… my life is made. You see? And then, very quickly. So my first job was with this company called IBM. I worked for IBM and then very quickly I quit my job and said, ‘I am ready to start my business.’ And I started my business also very early and it was a software company. And then what I say is that it was completely meaningless. I had such great hopes and expectations that I would feel so wonderful to own a software company or something like that. But we find that, at least it was found here, that it had no joy for me. It had no meaning for me.

So when you say that ‘everything seems very pointless. Everything seems very meaningless.’ It is very auspicious. It is very auspicious. Because even if you read scriptures, like the Yoga Vasistha. The Yoga Vasistha is a beautiful scripture where the Lord Ram himself was feeling so disillusioned with life. He said, ‘I have the whole kingdom. I have the best experiences possible.’ We were talking about experiences earlier, isn’t it? ‘So I have the best experience possible for me, but I find no joy in any of this. It is all completely meaningless.’ And this sense of meaningless makes you open to see what you really are. And openness comes from there, you see? If you continue to find meaning in the world, meaning in the mind, then there will not be openness to find the Truth. So I find nothing wrong in this, if you find everything pointless and meaningless it is very good. Then, we will find true meaning in your own True Self… the Eternal One. Because we have seen now that all that is appearing is coming and going. It has no meaning. Anything you get in this world… how long will it last? Thirty years, forty years, another hundred years? For you that is nothing. For eternity a hundred years is nothing. So you will find true meaning only in that which is eternal.

Clare: “Father, can I ask another question?” Yes, of course. “It’s like, I’m surrounded people who… everyone seems to find meaning in the world. And in my world… it’s just a funny place to be really. Is it just…?”

Yes. I completely understand where you’re coming from. Completely. Because it is only the rare one which says that I find no meaning in even the best that the world has to offer. So don’t expect that your near and dear ones…, especially it is the closest ones who will resist the most. Because they operate from this place of being fearful. See when I went to Tiru the first time, I got so many calls from my mother saying, ‘Are you coming back. Are you just going to live over there? What is going to happen to your family?’ You see? It is our closest ones who have these kind of fears. They are operating from this fear; they feel that they will lose you. But you can trust that whatever here is unfolding for you… as the Truth is unfolding for you, your presence will bless all those around you. They might not even realize it. They definitely won’t admit it. So don’t expect them to admit it, you see? But your presence will bring love, peace and joy to all those around you. And don’t even expect them to understand. If they were able to understand then they would also be in satsang. We cannot force them to understand, we cannot force them to come to satsang. Life will create the right conditions for everyone, for everyone to come back to their place of truth when the time is right. Don’t have an expectation that they should understand you and don’t have an expectation that they will… okay I lost my train of thought there.

Clare: “Can I ask another question?” Yes. “When you’re out and about, just in life, do you have anything to say to people? I feel like I don’t have anything to say.”

Are you asking when I am out and about? “Yeah.” When I am out and about? “Yes, when you are just out and about.” Yes, do you mean is there satsang going on even outside? Are you talking about the kind of interactions that happen? “Just normal interactions with people.” Yes, all is flowing on its own. If there is work, I have work. I have family, I have everything…, it is just flowing on its own. And when I find that the work situation is there, then I find that work words are coming out of the mouth. When I find that children situation is there, then I find that those words are coming out of my mouth. It is all just flowing on its own. That is why we say that the Self has no trouble playing any relationship. It’s only when we set a condition, that now I must only be this way or that way, then all the trouble can come. Just trust life. Just know that life knows what it is doing.

Clare: “Thank you. Thank you.”

You’re very welcome, my dear. It’s very good.

Clare: “I’m going to see Mooji today.” Oh how wonderful, yes, yes, yes. Very good. “I’m going to meet Wiebke.” Oh wonderful, wonderful. So great. Good. So much love to you my dear. And give my love to Moojiji and the whole team there as well. “Thank you.”

Shakti is also here. Denan. Dr. Kanchin. So happy to see all of you like this. This has become very troublesome now. I don’t know how to leave. Maybe I’ll just carry this computer around like this, everywhere I go.

Okay, let me just quickly see the Ustream chat once more.

Thank you all so much for being in satsang today.

Moojiji ki Jai! [Namaste]

Thank you to our wonderful moderator, Lizelle.

Lizelle: Anantaji ki Jai!

Sangha: Jai!

Thank you, thank you.

[Blows kiss and waves into camera]

What Is Looking from behind These Eyes?

Namaste everyone, very warm welcome to Satsang today. Moojiji ki Jai.

Thank you all so much for joining in. And again I’m a little early because we have multiple things to set up these days.

Amaya says Namaste. Namaste my dear.

Denan you’re here. Namaste. Would you like to share something?

Denan: Hi, Namaste. No questions, just wanted to be here. Wonderful, so wonderful you’re here.

So what’s happening, no one else wants to come in? [Live on the Interactive Video screen]. We’ve had enough of the hangout.

This very moment is the end, you see? The end of all seeking. The end of all desire. The end of all aversion. Unless you choose otherwise. So as consciousness, it is completely up to you. As a person nothing is up to you, but as Being all of this play is completely up to you. There is actually nothing else any of you need to hear. No other deepening is required. No other experience is required. Many of us are still waiting for the awakening experience. The liberation experience. But liberation is not an experience. Yes sometimes we can call awakening an experience. But the value of the awakening is not in the experience. In the clear seeing that I have always been this. So we can stop looking for any experience. And when we don’t look for any experience, then what remains? We can stop looking for anything if our eyes don’t have this grasping energy about themselves, then what remains. And what will happen when you look at others, when you look at their eyes you will be able to sense whether they carry an acceptance or whether they carry a need. And this will not be a judgment, it will be a seeing. The ability to see this. You see?

So this is like the famous example of this one who told Mooji that… when Mooji asked him, ‘What is looking from behind these eyes?’ He said, and I was there in Tiru when this happened. He said, ‘It is conditioning.’ You see? And when you say it is conditioning looking from behind these eyes, it means there is a sense of need. A sense of what’s in it for me. We say that the ego’s mantra is ‘What’s in it for me?’ And everything we’re looking at, we’re saying ‘Is there something in it for me, or not.’ And when we identify that there’s something in it for me, then that’s also not enough. We say, ‘me first’ or ‘me alone.’ If this question was to completely go away, ‘What’s in it for me?’ then how would our experience of the world be? And this question is very pervasive, you know, we don’t even realize it. If somebody calls us in our mind we are worrying, why is he calling me. If somebody comes to our house, it’s the same. Why is he taking so much of my time? What’s in this for me? Can we operate without this me? Without this concept of me? And even for satsang we can say these things like this, isn’t it? We say this. Like now I’ve heard enough. There’s nothing left in satsang for ‘me’. Actually for this ‘me’, there was never anything in satsang. So whose eyes are we looking from?

Namaste, hello my dear. Hello. So nice to meet you. [Ananta says hi to Vivi’s daughter] Very beautiful. Welcome to satsang my dear. Yes, I am also making faces… you are also making faces. My daughter is in school, otherwise she would have loved to meet you I’m sure.

Ishani says, “Father, can I come on to the hot seat?”

Ishani: “Namaste Father.” Namaste my dear. “I don’t have a question Father, but I just wanted to share. So when the last time I was asking you if I should make an effort to kind of do something because I wasn’t feeling to do anything. So now I think I kind of see why you said ‘no’, because I think that whatever, as in the things that has to unfold, it just will. There’s nothing that anybody here needs to be like pushing or pulling or thinking about it all. It’s just I wasn’t used to this emptiness I think.” Yes. “Like Moojiji says, you have to get used to it. So I wasn’t used to it. It was just unfamiliar I think. But now I felt hat it’s not even that an energy has to come back. It’s just that whatever has to unfold it just will, right?” Absolutely. “So that one which was trying to figure it out I think is… I can actually see that one, actually.” Yes. “And even that trying to be a certain way, like peaceful, and all those things I can see so clearly now. Anything can come now. I mean it may not always be perfect or spiritual or anything of that sort. It doesn’t touch this emptiness, I think.”

Ananta: Absolutely. Absolutely. So effort was only a pretense, you see? “Yeah.”  The one who was doing was only the same imagined one. All has always been unfolding on its own. And it’s not after spirituality or after realizing who we are that this change is like this. This has always been this way. We only pretend as if we were doing something, and then we realize that I never did anything at all. That’s why we say, surrender is not a doing, but it is a realization that it has always been this way. “Yes, Father. I’m still just staying quiet and not being too quick on making any final kind of statements because it’s still very new I think.” Yes. Even the quiet you’re not doing, you see? “Yes.” And even if some proclamation was to come, it will not be yours. “Yes.” But there will be this voice, which will now want to proclaim a lot. But we have let go of this voice now. The voice that was pretending to do anything at all has now been left behind. “Yes.” Because the interpreter started believing that it is the main speaker. The translator or the interpreter started believing that he is the main speaker. Beingness is everything. Beingness is experiencing everything. But the mind took on this position and started pushing for your belief. But the crime mystery is how the doer himself got confused and said that it is this voice who is the doer.

Ishani: “Yeah. And I think that there was like, this one…. I think I was getting caught in this place where things were going on expanding and new revelations kept happening, but then there is that place where nothing is happening. So I think I was getting caught in that place of ‘wow, wow, wow’. Such new things are happening, such new insights, more and more insights. But then actually it’s so simple. That place where nothing is happening is so simple. And anything can happen, it doesn’t have to be ‘wow’ or anything. It’s just ordinary.”

Ananta: So there will still be fresh insights that come. And there will be periods of time

where it seems like nothing is happening. And you are not concerned about either. Because the witnessing is unaffected by any of this. So when something comes, this sense of wonder can still be there. And wonder will come and wonder will also go. And as long as nothing is an expectation, then all is very good.

Ishani: “Whatever is there, I want to surrender everything. I don’t know if there is, but I just want to surrender everything at your feet.” Very good. So much love. “Thank you.” [Ananta blows kisses].

Naomi says, “Namaste, so nice to hear and see you all. I’m hoping to get on live soon, when the body is better.” Hope the body becomes better soon my dear. So much love to you.

Okay, let me quickly jump onto Ustream and let me see if there are any messages. Jayani had said, “Father, can I come onto the hot seat?” Yes, of course my dear.

Jayani: “Namaste Father, can you hear me? Last night when, sorry I’m shaking.” It’s okay, take your time. “Pardon?” Take your time. “Last night when I was… you know what’s going to happen? As I get on, my children are going to come in. As I was listening to Shakti’s broadcast and she was reading the Ashtavakra Gita… there is just seeing that the mind doesn’t even exist. Like, so much of what was seen was seen even from the position of this idea in this dream, awakening. But actually there is no mind, there is no one to awaken.” Yes, yes. “And um, I can’t, I don’t know how to even…. This person isn’t even…. Like previously it was known, but it was known by the person.”

Ananta: Yes completely. There used to be this person. So the seeking, the seeker also started off as a personal identity, didn’t it? It is the person that wanted freedom. Freedom was the next target, the next goal for this person. So even the desire for freedom started as a personal search. But this is the only desire, which at the end leaves the person as well. This is the only desire that if it comes to its true culmination, then the person will also be dropped. In many instances what may happen is that the person says, ‘I am free’ and it starts to believe it, you see? And that is called the spiritual ego. The person feels that I separately am now free. You are not free, but I am free. That is the spiritual ego. Freedom only means to see that there was never a person here. Hence, all of us are the Self alone.

Jayani: “It was always seen and there was a nothingness, but I can’t put it into words. It’s like… there were realizations and falling away and experiences, but it was always as if there was some kind of a mind. But there’s no mind…. There’s just nothing.”

Ananta: Yes. So what was happening is it’s the mind’s habit to work in this way. A thought appears and then we say, ‘It was my thought.’ The same way an experience comes, even it could be an awakening experience, and then we say it was ‘my awakening.’ You see? The minute we call it mine, then it becomes trouble.

Jayani: “I can’t even really speak, Father.” Very good. “Just so grateful.

Ananta: We have all these scriptures being read. The Ashtavakra Gita; Shakti was reading it, and some insight can come like this. The words of these scriptures are so powerful and so beautiful.

Jayani: “And it was seen that there was still an interest in the play; still an investment in the play particularly children and motherhood. And enjoying that aspect of the play, but it’s just not true. It’s just not real. There’s just not anybody having that perception, and yet there’s still a sense of a person having that perception, but that’s still just part of the play.”

Ananta: Yes. So the play can be enjoyed, but as an audience member, you see? “Yeah.” If we start believing that we are the character in the play, then it is a different sort of play. This is also your own play. To pretend to be the character in the play is also your own play, but then when you start suffering too much in this character role then you say, ‘Okay, I just want to be the audience.’ And in that also there is some enjoyment, and that’s why maybe it continues. The appearance can continue to come and go. It cannot happen without consciousness. So when you see yourself as the witness or the audience of the play, then no problem. When we start identifying as a character within the play, then all the trouble starts.

Jayani: “It’s funny Father, I don’t even see myself as a witness, its just nothing.”

Ananta: Yes. It’s very good you say this because many times when I say witness, we imagine a witness entity. But there is no entity, which is the witness. It is witnessing itself, which is here. For beginners in satsang we can say that ‘First be the witness. Come to your witnessing position. Be the witness.’ And then we say, ‘is this witness also real? Is there an entity there who is the witness? Who does witnessing belong to?’ To nobody. Awareness is not a thing, it is not an entity. So when you say that even this witness is not there, it is completely true. And yet witnessing is ever present. Now the mind will come in and it will say, ‘Now you got it’, you see? What it is basically saying is that, ‘I got it’ and you must not believe that thought also.

Jayani: “Because there’s been experiences of seeing on so many occasions, but something… I don’t know, I can’t even evaluate.”

Ananta: Yes. The one who is coming to take ownership of the seeing, that is completely non-existent and untrue. “Absolutely. Absolutely, absolutely.”

(Jayani talking to her daughter, “Can you say hello?” Hello my dear. “Say hello. Om Namah Shivah.”  ‘Om Namah Shivayah’. Om Namah Shivayah, so sweet. Very good.).

Jayani: “Thank you Father. Thank you. Thank you so much. And I place everything in this fire and just say thank you, thank you, thank you. Yes, yes, yes.” You’re welcome. “Thank you Father. Thank you Father. Thank you Shakti.” Thank you.

Marta has a question.

Marta: “When you said ‘the mind doesn’t exist’…” Yes. “It’s very difficult for me to follow….”

Ananta: To follow that the mind doesn’t exist. So, let’s look at it. What is the mind? When there is thought, we say there is the mind. When there is no thought, we say there is no mind. Isn’t it? Zen Buddhists also say the no mind state means no thought. It’s all clear. But there is a witnessing of mind and witnessing of also of no mind. There is a witnessing of thought and a witnessing of no thought. You are there to say mind was noisy or mind was completely quiet. You see? The witnessing is present there to say that. So the mind is what? The mind is only a bundle of all of these thoughts. Thoughts, memories… yeah it’s only as this. Only as this energetic coming up and going. You see? Comes from nothing, goes back into nothing. That is the only way it is presumed to be seen. It’s not… it doesn’t have any tangible entity about itself. It’s not like a person sitting somewhere really and saying… It only pretends, it’s only the voice. With that voice gives it more power, it seems to make it real. But when we keep that distance, we don’t believe it, then it’s just……

Marta: When you say don’t exist?

Ananta: Yes, yes. The appearance comes and goes, yes. So nobody is denying that it does not appear and disappear. We are only saying that it doesn’t have any substance. Only this (makes gesture with his hand of coming and going). You see? It’s like smoke, you see, it is there… there’s nothing. You can’t hold onto it. Very good.

Ananta: Wow, there’s a lot of chat. Yes.

Kapil says, “A thought just came here. What if we could have a webpage or document where we have a list of most common statements that the imagined one tries to trick us with?” Yes, this is very nice. Yes. “It will help us all see that the imagined one has these limited concepts where it tries to trick everybody.” This is very good. In fact, there was a satsang where Amaya or maybe Aradhana or somebody in the satsang team can remember where we looked at many of these tricks. This is very good. Common ego tricks. Very good.

Ananta: Observe what happens when there is silence. When there is silence, then the mind starts staying ‘what’s going on?’ It feels unsteady, uncomfortable… but you will all get used to this silence. And then even the words, which are arising, will not seem to break this silence. They will seem to just be apart of the silence itself. Nothing can disturb your silence then.

[A few minutes of Silence]

If this is not freedom, then what must freedom be? Every time we buy a story about freedom, we pretend to be bound.

Let’s have the audio on for Zoe; let’s see what’s happening there.

Zoe: (Laughing). “Nothing, nothing, nothing. What else could it be? What else is there? There is nothing else, but this. (Laughing). Nothing. Nothing. (Laughing). Ah, it’s so beautiful. So perfect. Thank you.”

Ananta: So much wanting freedom, wanting freedom… that we don’t recognize it when it is already here. Who can look at this one and say she is not free?

Zoe: Everywhere I look, there’s nothing but freedom. Everywhere. I can’t look in a single direction and find ‘not freedom’, it’s everywhere. It’s everywhere. It’s all there is.

Ananta: Yes, this is freedom, you see? It can never be that I can say that freedom is here, but it is not there. It cannot be. Freedom means to see that it is all freedom. To see that no bondage ever was real. Which thought will we pick up now?

Zoe: Well that would be freedom too, so that doesn’t matter. “Ah, she’s policing me now. “No, no no. No, never. No. (Laughing). No badge here, no badge.” Did we lose the audio? And the video too? (Audio and video back). “I’m back.” She has the complete freedom to switch it off if she wants too. “I’m back.”

Ananta: This is very good. You see, this question I feel is very important. To ask, ‘If this is not freedom, than what is?’ At the least it will expose our painting of what freedom is. Our concept of what freedom is. And for many of us, we still believe that freedom is (audio cuts out), some state like that. Or something else… whatever picture the mind has painted, but it’s none of those states. There is nowhere we have to get to, there is no experience we need to have. Because all experiences have a best before date, you see? All experiences have an ‘expire’ date. We spoke about this earlier as well, you see? The best music, you love it. How many times do you hear it? You hear it one hundred times… you hear it one full day and then the next day if you put it on… ‘Quiet, quiet, I want some quiet.’ The best food, how much? The best sensation…. The best sex. How much sex can you have? Every experience has its limitation, and if freedom was an experience than it would be limited by these senses again. If freedom was a state, then it would be limited like this.

So once this contemplation came to me that, ‘what would heaven be like? If there is a heaven, then what would it be like? I would say, best music. These angels playing there, what are they, harps. What are they? The harps. How long will you hear them? The best food, but how much of that you want? What will be heaven? So heaven is here right now. In this beautiful neutrality is heaven, because neutrality does not care about experience. All is welcome. There is no resistance. But in our wanting a particular state, in our wanting something… we make this heaven into hell. In our wanting or wanting to not have something. Wanting to resist something…. Either. That’s why acceptance is the neutrality that we speak about. And acceptance does not mean that no movement will now happen through the body. Actions will also still continue. So it’s neither a doing or a non doing. So I can tell you all this. You are free now. You are free now. All of you. On Ustream, on Hangout and on YouTube. All of you are free now. But you, some of you will pretend to be bound by believing a thought that will come. But if you refuse to believe, then you cannot even pretend to be bound. And that’s why satsang becomes mostly about, ‘It was clear. Freedom was there. But, then…’ You see?

I read something very beautiful that Byron Katie had posted on Facebook. ‘Being a believer is very exhausting.’ You get very tired believing all these concepts and ideas. So maybe my only question should be, so what did you believe? Between yesterday’s satsang and today’s satsang, what did you believe? Which thought did you pick up? I can give you all freedom certificates right now. What conditions apply, you see? And the condition apply means, conditional to you not believing your next thought. And it could be now the most glorious thoughts, you see, the most glorious ones. “Now I am God. Now I am completely free.’ Even these thoughts have no meaning for you. And life will push all your buttons. This one…. now this one… try to ignore this one if you can. All the buttons will be pushed, and that is Grace. And that is Grace. Even this switching from Ustream to Hangout has been pushing so many buttons, I know that. But all of you are managing so beautifully, so gracefully. All the feelings… especially those who are not able to get into the Hangout, are also getting these feelings of being left out again, you see? This is a familiar feeling. This familiar fear of being left out. But I see that, although frustration might come for a few minutes, then everything is seen as nothing, nothing, nothing. So life knows exactly what it is doing. And it has perfect timing.

Labode says, “I surrender this unwillingness to surrender my desire for my work to be very successful, and helping many. I surrender my sense of self-importance and ‘little me’ doing the work.” This is very good.

In some cultures, especially in India we have this strong conditioning about work. You see, if you meet people many will ask you, ‘So what do you do? What’s your work?’ In many cultures it’s a question which is a little private, so not everybody says. At least not in the first meeting. But in India typically what happens is first question that people ask is, ‘What do you do?’ And even with me what happens now is there are friends on Facebook who know me from work. So they’re like ‘So have you become fully now Baba, you have no work? You will do only satsang?’ Or then they’ll say, ‘So how do you balance?’ Because work seems to be such an important part of identity, especially in some cultures. That’s why I’m very happy to read this. You say, ‘I surrender my desire for my work to be very successful.’ This is very good. So see that there is no one here. The worker identity is also being surrendered now. Good. Very good.

Naomi says, “Dearest Anantaji. Third virus in nearly three months has afflicted this body and illness is usually attached to fear. I notice I attempt to drop the thoughts and strong fear vibrations remain anyway.”

We actually cannot predict why these things sometimes happen. Sometimes there has been a lot which has been held inside and when it is getting released then it can feel like it is manifesting in these strong sensations. Jayani was saying earlier that body is vibrating. Sometimes illness. You see Mooji has even coined a term for it. He calls it ‘satsang fever.’ And inevitably, in silent intensives many, many illnesses will come. Once there was a time where Garima attended the silent intensive, and half the silent intensive everyone got diarrhea, in Tiruvannamalai. And they even laid out beds in the satsang hall. Moojiji had said you cannot miss satsang, even if you are suffering terribly. So we organized beds in the satsang hall. And people would just come and lie in the presence of satsang.

So it is not uncommon for this kind of satsang fever to come, you see? But I am always very clear to say that this body is like an instrument that we have. It’s like a car. We say this often, isn’t it? So if the car needs a mechanic, no problem. Go to a mechanic. We should also not have this belief that, ‘Oh, now I’m free. Now I’m spiritual. My body should not get sick.’ That’s another expectation or condition, isn’t it? And life will push that button also…. ‘See you thought you were free. But look at this body, where it’s going.’ So if the car needs a mechanic, go to a mechanic. Just don’t say that the car is me. That is the only problem. You see? You will not say, ‘my car should not break down now, I’m spiritual.’ But why we say ‘body should not break down now that I’m spiritual.’ That still would expose that there is some body identification. This is very good. Satsang fever is very, very common. Then go with your intuition, you see? Intuition will tell you whether something needs to go to a doctor or whether it’s alright. All my blessings are with you. May your body be completely fine in double quick time.

Atma says, “Super great satsang. We are always free now. Only now is.” Very good.

And Clare…. If Clare has a question you can try to unmute your mic and say.

Clare: “Hello, hello.” Namaste, hello. “Namaste. I just keep labeling. And the person in me keeps going on and on about pointlessness.”

Ananta: I can tell you a story. For a long time, when I was growing up. And what was happening in India was that this whole information technology revolution was happening. You see, software…. software industry. And my family comes from this software IT background. So there was this feeling that one day I want to own a software IT company. So a lot of my childhood went in this dream. I felt that once I have a software company that I’m done… my life is made. You see? And then, very quickly. So my first job was with this company called IBM. I worked for IBM and then very quickly I quit my job and said, ‘I am ready to start my business.’ And I started my business also very early and it was a software company. And then what I say is that it was completely meaningless. I had such great hopes and expectations that I would feel so wonderful to own a software company or something like that. But we find that, at least it was found here, that it had no joy for me. It had no meaning for me.

So when you say that ‘everything seems very pointless. Everything seems very meaningless.’ It is very auspicious. It is very auspicious. Because even if you read scriptures, like the Yoga Vasistha. The Yoga Vasistha is a beautiful scripture where the Lord Ram himself was feeling so disillusioned with life. He said, ‘I have the whole kingdom. I have the best experiences possible.’ We were talking about experiences earlier, isn’t it? ‘So I have the best experience possible for me, but I find no joy in any of this. It is all completely meaningless.’ And this sense of meaningless makes you open to see what you really are. And openness comes from there, you see? If you continue to find meaning in the world, meaning in the mind, then there will not be openness to find the Truth. So I find nothing wrong in this, if you find everything pointless and meaningless it is very good. Then, we will find true meaning in your own True Self… the Eternal One. Because we have seen now that all that is appearing is coming and going. It has no meaning. Anything you get in this world… how long will it last? Thirty years, forty years, another hundred years? For you that is nothing. For eternity a hundred years is nothing. So you will find true meaning only in that which is eternal.

Clare: “Father, can I ask another question?” Yes, of course. “It’s like, I’m surrounded people who… everyone seems to find meaning in the world. And in my world… it’s just a funny place to be really. Is it just…?”

Ananta: Yes. I completely understand where you’re coming from. Completely. Because it is only the rare one which says that I find no meaning in even the best that the world has to offer. So don’t expect that your near and dear ones…, especially it is the closest ones who will resist the most. Because they operate from this place of being fearful. See when I went to Tiru the first time, I got so many calls from my mother saying, ‘Are you coming back. Are you just going to live over there? What is going to happen to your family?’ You see? It is our closest ones who have these kind of fears. They are operating from this fear; they feel that they will lose you. But you can trust that whatever here is unfolding for you… as the Truth is unfolding for you, your presence will bless all those around you. They might not even realize it. They definitely won’t admit it. So don’t expect them to admit it, you see? But your presence will bring love, peace and joy to all those around you. And don’t even expect them to understand. If they were able to understand then they would also be in satsang. We cannot force them to understand, we cannot force them to come to satsang. Life will create the right conditions for everyone, for everyone to come back to their place of truth when the time is right. Don’t have an expectation that they should understand you and don’t have an expectation that they will… okay I lost my train of thought there.

Clare: “Can I ask another question?” Yes. “When you’re out and about, just in life, do you have anything to say to people? I feel like I don’t have anything to say.”

Ananta: Are you asking when I am out and about? “Yeah.” When I am out and about? “Yes, when you are just out and about.” Yes, do you mean is there satsang going on even outside? Are you talking about the kind of interactions that happen? “Just normal interactions with people.” Yes, all is flowing on its own. If there is work, I have work. I have family, I have everything…, it is just flowing on its own. And when I find that the work situation is there, then I find that work words are coming out of the mouth. When I find that children situation is there, then I find that those words are coming out of my mouth. It is all just flowing on its own. That is why we say that the Self has no trouble playing any relationship. It’s only when we set a condition, that now I must only be this way or that way, then all the trouble can come. Just trust life. Just know that life knows what it is doing.

Clare: “Thank you. Thank you.”

Ananta: You’re very welcome my dear. It’s very good.

Clare: “I’m going to see Mooji today.”

Ananta: Oh how wonderful, yes, yes, yes. Very good. “I’m going to meet Weibke.” Oh wonderful, wonderful. So great. Good. So much love to you my dear. And give my love to Moojiji and the whole team there as well. “Thank you.”

Shakti is also here. Denan. Dr. Kanchin. So happy to see all of you like this. This has become very troublesome now. I don’t know how to leave. Maybe I’ll just carry this computer around like this, everywhere I go.

Okay, let me just quickly see the Ustream chat once more.

Thank you all so much for being in satsang today.

Moojiji ki Jai! [Namaste]

Thank you to our wonderful moderator, Lizelle.

[Lizelle]: Anantaji ki Jai! [Sangha] Jai!

Thank you, thank you.

[Blows kiss and waves into camera]

Namaste everyone, very warm welcome to Satsang today. Moojiji ki Jai.

Thank you all so much for joining in. And if this is your first time in satsang, the way to ask questions is through the chat window. Namaste, Namaste.

Who has a burning question and can join on video? Namaste. Namaste, welcome Naomi as well. So if someone has a question and wants to ask in a one on one interaction, I can send you a link.

In the meanwhile something is arising here to say. It is like we have a judge. So we have taken many different aspects of this mind. We have called it the ‘interpreter’, we have called it the ‘wrong number’ and we have called it the ‘comedian’ the other day. Another aspect of this mind is the ‘judge’. We are always waiting for the mind’s judgment. You’re always waiting for the mind’s conclusion. And without this conclusion, something feels unsettled. We’re so used to these conclusions from the mind. Conclusion about a seeming another, a judgment about something else, a judgment about our own freedom. And many of us get stuck because we keep waiting for this judgment. Waiting for the mind to profess your freedom. Isn’t it? For many who are new to satsang, they are also sitting in judgment at the words that are spoken in satsang itself. And many come to just confirm what they already think they know. So this mind is constantly sitting in judgment about everything.

Namaste, very good.

Lizelle says, “Father you have burnt all our questions.” Yes.

Aradhana says, “No questions, Ananta, just happy to be in satsang.” Very good.

Dee says, “Yes, no questions here either. Just love to be here with you all.” So much love to you, too. Very welcome.

Namaste, Jyoti. So I’ll post the link in any case. And if a question arises, you can jump on. So this is the way I feel we can do things. I know Om has come up with a solution as well, but haven’t been able to speak to him. If there is a burning question, there can be a link for one on one interaction. And then everyone else can listen on Ustream. You feel that is okay?

Prema says, “Sounds good.” Very good.

So all questions gone.  (Laughing) Everything is completely clear? Or is there just some fear about coming on the hot seat?

Ginger says, “Fear of hot seat.” Yes, please click the button. You please click the button, let’s see what happens.

Oh, Naomi would like to speak as well. Very good. So first Ginger, then Naomi.

Denan says, “Yes, fear of hot seat and fear my questions aren’t burning enough or good enough.” Oh, don’t worry about that.

Okay, Ustreamer 161 has a question. They say, “It is a joy and transformation as Awareness as Consciousness directly experiences Consciousness.” Yes. “In my experience, fears of seeing-ness are very subtle in reflections of light energies which emit and transmit echoes of Awareness.” Yes.

We have made it very, very simple, you see? So when you want to see or perceive Consciousness, all that needs to be seen is that you cannot stop being. Can you stop being now? And this being which cannot be stopped is Consciousness. It is in the light of this being that the whole phenomenal experience arises. And the one that is aware even of this being is the Absolute, is Awareness itself. So it is completely clear that it is ever-present. Because if I was to ask you, and you were not to rely on the mind for the answer, you were to see that you are aware now. Are you aware now? And it is Awareness itself, which is aware of Awareness. Also, it is not an object or phenomena which is seen to confirm ‘I am aware now’. Awareness is the only non-phenomenal seeing, or the only non-phenomenal seeing. Awareness aware of itself.

Nirmayi: “I wanted to sit here and meet you. Lots of fear. “

So happy to see you.

Nirmayi: “Very happy to see you. I just felt this urge; I just had to come and sit here.”

Very good.

Nirmayi: “And to tell you I love you.”

Oh, I love you too, my dear.

Nirmayi: “Thank you so much for doing this for us. That you love us so much to do this.”

It’s my complete joy. It’s my complete joy. Is there anything at all that you’d like to ask? I know my audio is not behaving well right now; but that’s okay.

Nirmayi: “The only question I have is that I don’t know exactly where I am? I mean I obviously know where I am locationally, but I don’t know where I am in the play of things.” Yes. “It’s like I have no idea. I don’t know which way is up, if I’m inside out, upside down. I have absolutely no idea. And I know that really shouldn’t matter.” Yes.

Who’s the one that looks for where you are?

Nirmayi: “Okay, who’s the one that looks for where you are? Ahhh. Who’s the one? That’s one of the problems is that I’m hopeless at self-enquiry. I mean, I sort of…, I ask the questions ‘who’s doing this?’ and I never feel the answer.” Yes.

So the purpose of self-inquiry is to find that there is no person here, there is no entity, which I can call ‘me.’ So if I were to say ‘Is there a person there?’ and you were to say, ‘Okay, let me look. No, I cannot find where I am’ like you said. So the minute you say ‘I cannot find where I am’ means we cannot take the perspective of a person now, because this person cannot be found.

Nirmayi: “Yes.”

So till you find this person; don’t pretend to be a person. Then what remains? What remains is there are these thoughts that come. So there are these thoughts that come.  (I know the audio is a bit of a challenge. Do you have some headphones?)

Nirmayi: “Yes it’s like nothing. Even when I find nothing, I don’t’ seem to be convinced by that.” Yes. (We’ll just wait for you to put on the headphones). “Okay, I have the headphones on.”

So when you say ‘I cannot find what I am or where I am, yet I am not convinced by this’…, so there’s still an ‘I’ which is sitting in judgment to this experience. This ‘I’ is only the voice of your mind.

Nirmayi: “Of course.”

This voice is the pretend voice. This voice is pretending to be you.

Nirmayi: “Yes.”

So if you were to let go of this voice and not believe it, then what would life be like?

Nirmayi: “Very peaceful.”

Yes, it is as simple as that, you see?  “Yes.” So the voice is pretending to be you, and then treating you as if you are a person. That is why we say…, so the voice is saying that the sun rises from the west. And then the Master comes and says ‘But why don’t you look for yourself?’ So the voice is saying that you are a person, and the Master is saying ‘Why don’t you look for yourself?’ And then what happens is you see that the sun is not rising from the west. And then the voice is saying ‘But I’m still not convinced. Maybe today is a cloudy day’. You see? And then we check again. And again you see it’s not rising from the west. And the voice says ‘I’m still not convinced’. And this play can go on for a very long time, until you decide that you’re not going to listen to this voice because it doesn’t seem credible, you see?

Nirmayi: “Yes, it’s been going on for a very long time.” Yes, yes, yes.

So as long as we are giving some credibility, we are giving some meaning, some belief to this voice, then this play can seem to go on for a long, long time. So to put it very simply: Freedom is not believing your next thought.

Now a thought will come. It will say ‘It cannot be that simple’ or ‘I still don’t get it’ or something like that. And if you give that belief, then again you seem to be stuck, isn’t it? Or there can be an expectation that ‘I thought that freedom would look different. Something special must happen’.

Nirmayi: “Yes, I mean it’s like I know that that isn’t going to happen, and yet it’s an expectation that there’s going to be a moment, you know, and you just can’t help it. But it’s just a thought [Laughing]” Yes. “It’s a persistent sticky one

We’re waiting for fireworks or some event to happen which will convince the mind that ‘I am free’. But I can tell you that even if the most sublime experience was to come, then the mind will make that an expectation. And as with all experiences, all experiences come and go, you see? So when it goes, it will say that ‘you were free for a short amount of time, but now have lost it’. This is the problem with spiritual experiences, you see? Therefore, there is great beauty in this sober seeing, with no fireworks also, very beautiful. Because it takes away the spiritual trap of experiences. So freedom for me first is the inability to suffer. And you cannot suffer without believing your thoughts.

Nirmayi: “That side of not believing my thoughts, I mean, my suffering is very minimal because, in that aspect, I don’t believe my next thought.” Yes. “I know the mind is nothing, nothing.” Yes. “And I’m very free flow, you know. Mooji describes the leaf just dropping and just seeing what happens; just being spontaneous. So my life is…, in one aspect I’ve taken on all of your and Mooji’s pointings…., it’s just this. So my life reflects the pointings, except for this one little sticky one, which you’ve just also…, which you’ve explained.”

In this moment, can you find any bondage? Without referring to the past or imagining a future, is there any bondage now?

Nirmayi, “No…, no.”

This is freedom.

Nirmayi: “It is… [Laughing].”

Yes. If you don’t pick up a ‘but, but, but’…, If you don’t pick up a ‘but, but, but’…, you know what I’m saying? If you don’t pick up a but, then there is no problem.

Nirmayi: “Yes, I heard. I have no buts. Yes.”

I see complete freedom. The mind will come in. The mind will come in and it will tell you all kinds of things. But you know what to do with it now, isn’t it?

Nirmayi: “Yes, yes I do.”

Just withdraw your belief. Don’t give it any belief. It is as simple as this. It is this.

Nirmayi: “I will let someone else have a go in the hot seat now. Thank you very much.”

Thank you so much.

Nirmayi: “I love you.” Love you, too [blows kisses and Namaste].

Thank you, also, Bhagavati ji, thank you.

All right, let’s see what’s happening on the Ustream chat. Too much chat to catch up with.

Kapil says, “That is what happens here, too. It is clear that nothing to worry about without believing a thought, but then the mind comes up ‘Are you sure this is it? Are you sure you’re not deluded? What if you have misunderstood?”

It’s a very common mind trick; very common mind trick. And you know it’s a trick, so it will not last.

And while Ginger’s connecting, if someone else would also like to connect. We said who? After Ginger we said…, was it Louise?

Louise says, “Scared.” Then you must come, my dear. Come. Now that’s okay, come.

This is very good, because we have replicated the satsang hall in this way now. And you all must be tired of my monologues; it will be good to hear another voice as well.

Kapil says, “There is somebody here, too, who is afraid of the hot seat.” Yes. “And it is happy that I don’t have a webcam. So I will buy a webcam asap and put myself on the hot seat.” Very good, my dear, very good. “When I get a chance next.” Yes, you must. Very good.

Namaste, Jade. And Denan wants to come as well. So after Louise, we can get Denan.

Namaste, Louise.

Louise: “Hello, Namaste.”

So happy, so happy.

Louise: “I don’t have a question.”

Are you sure?

Louise: “Not really. I don’t know. I can’t think of anything. Nothing is coming. I’m nervous actually.” Yes.  “Something that sort of came up was like…, belief just seems to go to thought. It’s as if that’s not a thought, whether or not it goes there sometimes.”

Only for the strongest parts of our identification that have been nourished over many, many years, this can seem to happen, isn’t it? It has become a habit for us to give meaning and belief to those kind of thoughts. So if we try to look at it one thought at a time, it becomes a longer process. It is better to look at this section of the photo album and say ‘Which identity is this talking to?’ Is it relationship identity? Is it seeker identity? Is it mother identity? And then we can look and see that this one identity just does not exist. So it’s good to inquire sometimes and to see that this part of me, which seems so real and meaningful, is just made up like everything else.

Louise: “I guess the seeker one.”

The seeker one.

Louise: “Yeah.”

And what does the seeker want? What does the seeker want?

Louise: “Freedom…, just yeah”

Yes, and it wouldn’t know what to do with freedom if it saw it. The seeker identity has no idea what to do with freedom. “No.” So it is only creating this false expectation and it will only sit in judgment and say that you are not yet free.

Louise: “No, all it knows how to do is just keep trying. It doesn’t know how to see.”

So like I asked Nirmayi, in this moment is there any bondage?

Louise:  “No, there’s just sensations and thought.

And are you bound by them? Are you bound by the appearance of sensation or the appearance of thought?

Louise: “Sometimes it seems like it, yeah.”

No, we’re saying right now. We’re not projecting into the past and we’re not projecting into the future. We’re saying right now. Allow everything to come. Right now, allow it to come.

Louise: “It feels like it because it’s got all the attention.”

Yes, yes. Who’s witnessing even this feeling? Don’t give it to the mind because the mind will say ‘No, no, this is not it.’ The one that is witnessing your computer or ipad or phone, is it not the same witness who’s witnessing feelings and states? “Yeah.” Is this one affected by what it is witnessing? “No.” And how far are you from this one? The untouched one… how far are you from this untouched one? “I don’t know. I don’t….” Who sees this thought coming up which says ‘I don’t know’? “Something. I know I can feel… it’s just, I don’t know. Sorry.” No (smiling), don’t go along with any thought. Don’t go along with any energy. There can be this energy of disappointment. ‘I’m here with Ananta, but I’m still not getting it’. You see? It’s all rubbish, just keep it aside.

Louise: “It’s so busy…, it’s so busy.”

Yes, yes. Don’t measure the traffic also. Let it be busy. Let it be completely busy. Don’t say that it must not be busy. Pretend as if you’ve come to India. Let it all come. Don’t resist anything. Don’t say that something should not appear. Who is affected by this feeling, by this thought? And don’t try to work hard to solve this question. Just let the answer appear on its own. Too much effort, too much effort; let it all go. There is nothing that you need to get.

Louise: “There’s this expectation that attention will stop going to the thoughts.”

Attention can go. Attention can go to the thoughts. Without belief it cannot make you suffer. But the expectation that ‘attention should not go to thoughts’ will make you suffer. Because attention will go to thoughts. That’s why we’ve made it so simple, you see? We don’t even say ‘let go of your next thought’ now. Because the trouble would come with the pointing: Let go. So now we are saying: Just don’t believe it.

Even if you are completely paying attention to just this thought…, and the thought could be very negative. The thought could be that ‘I just don’t get it. Everyone else is getting it, but I just don’t seem to get it’. So this could be the thought and full attention is going to it. But you can still choose whether to believe it or not. As Consciousness…, to say that if you had a choice as Consciousness, this is the only choice you have. So what seems like it happens automatically, it seems like belief is going automatically, you will find that even this is not true. “I don’t know.” And don’t wait for the mind to confirm, you see? Let me confirm for you.

Louise: “I can’t even attach to anything; like the thoughts, anyway.” Yes. “It’s just a blur of energy and…” Yes. “I don’t even know what to say, to be honest.”

Yes. But this blur can be there. If you’re not believing a thought about the blur, then the blur is no problem. If you don’t say that the blur should go, then the blur is no problem.

Louise: “Yeah. I don’t know what to say.” It’s good. “Clarity just seems to come on its own and I’m just trusting whatever is happening.”

Don’t rely even on clarity. “Yeah.” If clarity seems like a state of peace and quiet, then don’t rely even on this. “Okay.” There is nothing, nothing, nothing we need to get. “Yeah, there’s an expectation that something will change.” Yeah, but this is also seen, isn’t it? “Yeah.” And whatever is seen is just another appearance.

Louise: “So nothing changes?”

Everything is constantly changing. Everything is constantly changing. But you mean that when freedom comes, then does the world become different? No, it doesn’t. Does our mind become different? No, it doesn’t. Do emotions stop coming? No, it doesn’t. Everything will continue, but you stay as the witnessing alone. And even when something is picked up, then it is quickly dropped.

Do you remember this graphic that you made a long time ago? It is as simple as that. You pick up the pen, then you drop it. Otherwise, just don’t pick it up. So the pen is anything in the appearance, you see? It could be energy, it could expectation, it could be desire, it could be aversion, it could be a thought. It’s all the same pen…, the same pen. And the pen will say ‘Oh, you don’t have a choice to pick it up, it just happens on its own’. You see? That’s another pen. It’s the same pen. Don’t believe… “Sorry, I don’t know.” Don’t know; don’t know anything.

This is very good. Your mind is just grasping at straws to keep you entangled now. “Yeah.” It could be saying anything. Even now, it could be saying anything. It’s probably saying even now ‘You’ve taken a lot of time’ or something like that. “Yes, yes, it was actually.” I could see that in your eyes. “Yeah.” Everything is exactly how it is meant to be. Nothing needs your mind’s intervention.

Louise: “So what to do about it happening? It’s like, why is it still happening?”

When it happens, you drop the pen. When it’s happening, it means you picked up a belief. Without picking up a belief, it cannot happen. So when it pinches, when it starts pinching you say ‘Okay what have I picked up?’

Louise: “Sorry.” It’s okay. “It just doesn’t shut up.”

Yes, as long as you feel that it should shut up; I can tell you that for the greatest sage, the mind does not shut up. Don’t have that expectation. See, who told you that the mind should shut up? Was it the mind itself? Isn’t it? It is only trying to set you up for this failure. To set you up, give you this false expectation, and then to tell you ‘This doesn’t happen, hence I’m not free’.

Louise: “The one I’m noticing is getting belief is that ‘suffering will go’.”

And what is suffering? “Believing thought.” Yes, you see? You see? So this thought itself that ‘suffering will go’ is causing suffering. You see this? “Yes.” You cannot suffer without believing a thought. Now, you just drop it. “Yeah. Okay.” So freedom is like this. Moment to moment. There is no such thing as a permanent liberation. Even I don’t know what the next ten minutes will be like. I could get completely identified as a person. But this will not mean that I am not That, which I have seen myself to be, which is pure Awareness itself.

Very good. Thank you so much, my dear. “I might let someone else have a go as well.” Yes, Denan is here as well. “Thank you.” So much love, thank you. Bye, sweetie (waving at camera to Louise’s daughter).

Namaste, Denan.

Denan: “Namaste, Ananta, Father. I’m so happy to be here with you in this way.” I’m so happy to. “I’m so grateful. My heart is racing.”

That’s okay. Take your time.

Denan: “I don’t have a question, I just knew I had to be here.” Yes. “I have lots of questions, but they’re not here right now. Just feeling I had to be here with you.” Yes. “And I do have lots of questions, but right now I just…, the heart just kept racing and the shaking and I just felt I needed to be here. I love you.” Oh, I love you, too, my dear.

Denan: “So I know there’s a lot…”

Just say whatever is coming up, that’s absolutely fine.

Denan: “Okay, okay. I ‘m really aware of the time.” Don’t be, don’t be, don’t be. I’m taking care of it. Don’t worry. “Okay. There’s a lot that comes up around death. And I feel like I should know better than to let the mind go. Because something knows there’s not a death, but there’s a lot of obsession with it.” Yes. “Mostly that of my loved ones.” Yes. “But mine as well. And it just…, for many years it’s terrorized me. Now there’s more openness around it, but it’s still…, it’s got a hold of something.”

Yes. So what is here that could die?

Denan: “The body could die.”

The body could die, but the body dies every night when you go to sleep. “Yes.” Doesn’t it die? “Yes.” And yet you want to go to sleep. “I do, I do…” See we look forward to sleeping because it is rest. We get tired of this phenomenal experiencing very quickly actually. Every night we want to sleep six hours, eight hours to get away from this constant phenomena.

Denan: “Right now it’s not a problem; when I’m with you it’s not a problem. I can’t find the problem. But I know that it haunts me, so there’s something. There seems to be something that still believes it’s the body.”

Yes. But the body is not concerned with the body’s death, isn’t it? “No.” So it is still the person, which is saying ‘You must be the body.’ So it is this person actually which is scared of becoming irrelevant, which it is becoming now. Because the person is losing all meaning. “Right, right.” This is what Mooji says; so what he says is that “I’m telling you that you’re the Supreme Lord. The Supreme Lord. And then something says, ‘no, no but I’m still this person’.” But you are the Supreme Lord. And then you say ‘Okay I’ll believe you, I must be the Supreme Lord, but can you please take care of the body?’

Denan: “My experience is that…., I’m sorry I didn’t get the last part.” It’s okay, take your time. We have time. “Sorry.” No, it’s completely fine. “How the fear runs is that it’s about my husband. There’s some fear; you know, it shows up for me as well.  But the gripping fear is the thought I don’t want to lose him. It’s been a long time, we’ve been together since we were very young; like over twenty years. And the way it shows up is I don’t want to lose him.” Yes. “And I follow that, that I have to believe there’s a ‘him’ and I have to believe there’s a ‘me’.”

Let’s make it even simpler, what do you say? Where is your husband right now?

Denan: “Where is he? Literally?” Yes. “He’s in the other room.”

Yes, but he’s with you, isn’t it? “Yes.” So this ‘with you’ is your own heart. So what is real cannot go. In the phenomenal realm actually you cannot be one, you see? It’s only in the real that you are one. And what is real cannot leave. See, there is no difference between being in the next room and being in different planets. But actually you’re still together in the heart.

Denan: “Right, and I arrive at this place that you’re talking about. And it’s known. I hear this and I know it’s true. Somehow it just…”

And don’t even feel that you must get rid of this, you see? “Okay.” It’s very natural. It’s very natural.

Denan: “I think that’s what happening, is I’m trying to get rid of it.”

No, you should not. It’s very primal. It’s very primal, it’s very natural. Even with animals you have this kind of attachment to partners and to children. “Right.” So why must you have to get rid of it? Is it another thing in the enlightened checklist that you have to take off?

Denan: “It was at one point, it was. I know better now.”

This is another trick of the mind. You must be free of this. Who says? “Yeah.” In fact, you’re causing so much misery to yourself by just imagining the death of something, which is here. Just here.

Denan: “Over and over, every day.” It’s just the trickster; it’s just the trickster. “Yes.”

So imagine your whole life you will spend thinking about death; and that doesn’t help, does it? “It doesn’t help.” So while life is here, live. While death is there, we will die. It’s okay. What is real will not leave.

Denan: “Right. Right, right. There’s something protesting it, but I know it’s not true. And there’s something…, there’s something…, not as much anymore, but afraid of the pain.”

Yes, pain can come. Pain can come. But pain is no trouble actually. It is the belief that pain should not come is more trouble than the actual pain, actually.

Denan: “It is so much more trouble. That is known from experience here.” Yes.

The one that gives birth in your heart is the creator of all these beings. Everything is already coming from you. And as Consciousness you are deciding how this world is projecting itself. So not a blade of grass will move without your permission; just not your permission as a person. All of this is your own play. And if it is your will, it will be done.

Denan: “Ananta, thank you so much.”

Oh, thank you, my dear. Thank you so much. [Namaste]

Denan: “It’s just so beautiful that you’re offering this to us in this way. I’m so grateful”

I’m so happy, so happy to do it.

Denan: “I love you so much.”

I love you, too. [Blows kiss and waves at camera]. Love you.

I see that Jayani is here. Jayani if you’re here, you can unmute your mic. We can stay for another fifteen minutes or so. And the Ustream chat is being neglected.

Jayani: “I don’t even know where…, Father, my relationship with my husband seems to be…, a lot of I would say probably tendencies in the relationship.” Yes.  “Which could just be ignored are being highlighted. And at the moment what is arising is there is that there is a huge question as to whether or not I still love him.” I see. “And whether this marriage is still a real marriage and not just a kind of convenience of two people being together because they have two children, or if there is really a communion there. And something inside feeling ‘no’ and the huge fear that that brings up because it’s the unknown, and saying ‘yes’ to the unknown. And all that is happening here is saying ‘yes’ to whatever is arising. I just wanted to bring it to satsang, whatever identity you feel or see or sense there. Just to highlight it or…, I don’t want to get caught in the story that my marriage is going to bring anything to me, or that the end of the marriage is going to bring anything to me, cause none of that really makes a difference.” Yes. “Does that make sense?

Completely. So what you have defined is the state of most marriages. I have not seen a marriage which is different. “Yes.” So first the mind will come and say that you are suffering much more than any other marriage. “Yeah.” But the institution is such that when there are two that come together, there are bound to be all of these. “Yes.” And this does not have anything to do with whether you should stay in the marriage or get out of it. That I know, that you know, will happen on its own. All that is happening, is happening itself anyway. “Yes.”  I’m just trying to get your mind out of the picture. Because the mind is selling you the story that ‘you can do this or you must do this or must not do this’.

Jayani: “Actually I’m not buying into any of that because that’s nothing.” Yes.  “And I know that whatever will happen, will happen. And I feel that that’s the truth that is totally seen here.” Yes. “There’s just a deep pain. Such a deep, deep pain that I have not, that has not been felt; there’s just such a deep pain.” Yes. “And I guess there’s something that wants to understand this pain” Yes. “Or make that pain better and all that’s been happening is just saying…, Just also not buying into the story of the pain, I guess.” Yes.

The pain also doesn’t have a story, you see? It is the interpretation of the pain, which has the story. “Yes.” So the pain is very pure. “It’s very pure.” Its just pain and it cannot touch you. Because only the interpretation of this pain, ‘that it should go’ or ‘why is it here?’ or even to try to understand it actually. How will you understand it, it’s just energy. You see? What will you understand about it? “Nothing.” So it will come and it will go. There is nothing that has come that can stay. “Yes.”

Jayani: “It’s not what I am.” Yes.

Don’t even call it pain. I know it’s easy for me to say.

Jayani: “No, I can hear you, I can hear you. It’s just a very…, (and even to describe it as an intense sensation in my heart area, is also giving it a name). It’s just a field of energy, I guess. Just a sensation.” Yes. It’s just a sensation.” Yes. “Okay.”

And you see, even to say that it is yours would be stretching it a bit, isn’t it? Because this ‘you’ to which it belongs to just does not exist. So at best you can say it is your appearance. “Yes. Yes.”

Jayani: “Or just an appearance here. Not even my appearance. Just an appearance.” Yes, yes, yes. “Not even my appearance. Like to be brutally honest.” It’s good. “It’s no more significant than a leaf I’m seeing outside, it’s just the mind saying it is.” Yes.

I couldn’t have put it any better than that.

Jayani: Sorry, I’m speaking to you through my phone and my whole body is shaking.

It’s okay, it’s okay. It’s kind of a fun experience. It feels like I’m on a ride of some sorts, at an amusement park.

Jayani: “So even the apparent dissolution of this marriage.., even in that, it’s nothing.” Yes. “And it’s such grace because the intensity of that can feel so real, but it’s actually such a blessing.” Yes.

Everything is grace. Everything is grace.

Jayani: “Everything. And this pain seems to have sanctity to it. I know that’s also making a story about it though. Even saying it has a sanctity to it, that’s also implying that there’s something that needs to be sanctified.”

It’s just nothing. Just another appearance.

Jayani: “Thank you, Father. I’m at your feet.”

Oh, you’re so welcome, my dear. Always in my heart.

Jayani: “Always in my heart, thank you so much.” Thank you, my dear

You’re good, you’re good? “Pardon?” You’re good now? “Yeah, I’m perfect.”  Very good, very good. “Thank you, thank you.”  [Ananta blows kiss at camera]

Vaishali says, “May I ask a question?” Yes, yes, of course. “Like in earlier chat, somewhere you said that when things are happening in your life, that means you are thinking of that part. Is that right?”

No, what I would have meant was…, I don’t remember that chat, but what I meant was that things are always going to happen. In this phenomenal existence, everything is constantly changing. But when we feel that we are suffering, it is because we have picked up a belief. “We have picked up…?” A belief. Or a thought. We have given our belief to a thought. We have picked up a concept. And we have said that ‘This applies to me’. So what we’ve done is, we’ve taken the pure sense of Beingness, the pure sense I Am, and we have said ‘I am a mother. I am a wife. I am a….’ something. You see? Because a thought is only speaking to identity. It is not speaking to you as pure Consciousness or Awareness, you see? A thought is always speaking to you as a person. And when we believe a thought, it means we have believed ourselves to be a person.

Vaishali: “Whether we pick up a thought or not, things are going to happen in front of you.”

Yes. If there is the waking state then appearances will always happen.

“What I was thinking, when I’m thinking some thought and I believe it, that means that things are coming up.”

No, this is not what I meant. See events will always happen, appearances will always happen. Suffering can only happen when you believe a thought about it. See? It is not like what they say in some of these manifestation or some of these books. We’re not trying to create the external appearance. You know, there are books like The Secret and all of that, which will say if you put your attention on a particular thought, that will manifest itself. We’re just not interested in any of that. Because if the manifestation appears, it will disappear also. How does it matter?

“Right, right. No I’m not interested in all that; Secret and all that.” Yes. “I wanted to know when things are happening…, so whether there’s believing those thoughts and that is happening. That was a….” Yeah I understand. “It doesn’t matter, good or bad; that is not a concern. I’m not saying I want to change that or anything. Picking up those thoughts…”

No, it’s not like that. The appearances will keep moving. Even in Bhagavan’s [Ramana Maharshi] life, in [Nisargadatta] Maharaj’s life, the appearance of life was continuing, you see? But they were not believing any interpretation about it. They were not believing the mind’s interpretation about it. That is freedom. So lovely to talk to you like this. Good to see you.

“Very happy.” So much love to you as well.

Yes, I’m so sorry. It was just a short trip with family. “That’s okay.”  Thank you, my dear, love you so much. Very good.

Thank you all so very much. I’m sorry I didn’t read all of the Ustream chat today. It was very beautiful. Thank you all so very much for being in satsang today.

Moojiji ki Jai! [Namaste] Thank you. [Blows kiss and waves]

Sangha: Anantaji ki Jai.  Thank you. Love you.

Q: Contemplate-like mind is sleeping in surrender.

It’s very good. Let it sleep. And now we’re not fearful of it waking up. We’re not afraid of what it is going to say also. That is Freedom. Freedom is not a state where we’re afraid of what the mind is going to say next.

Second Q: It’s what’s going on here. It’s a fear of the mind.

A fear of the mind, yes. What is the worst that the mind can do? It will question your freedom.

Second Q: It’s just saying ‘You’re going to fail miserably’. Even though I know it’s not true; it’s like, there’s so much clarity, and then the storm just comes, and it’s…, somehow, I’m believing that. And then the suffering starts.

So, always what could happen is that…, if you do a post mortem saying ‘There was clarity, and then storm came’ it means nothing actually. So there was an expectation that storm will not come now; or even if storm comes, why does it get my belief?

Second Q: Yeah, that’s the second one.

Okay. It’s the second one. Earlier it could have been the first. Now it has become ‘Okay, storm comes but I should not be able to believe it’. There’s still lurking this concept of ‘the Free one’ who should now not even believe something. But in the now, what is it? Who is that one who believed? Where is it now? It does not exist.

Our memory is the most unreliable thing; like we say in satsang, no? Like, we land in a dream in the middle of a situation…, most times we don’t say ‘Oh, where have I come? Who are these people?’ They feel familiar; we seem to have a history with them. We know who they are. So there is memory also of those characters which we’ve never met before. So, how reliable can this memory be? Every moment fresh…

Second Q: Sometimes I feel it’s just hard to drop the vibe. I mean I know I have to drop the next thought. It’s just, once it gets your attention and belief actually, it just seems so much effort to drop it.”  Yes. “And that creates more fear.

But that is also good, because if there are some thoughts which still get our belief, then that means that there is some identity which has not been transcended yet.

Second Q: I asked to surrender it, and then the storm came. It’s just like you say…, you surrender it, and then you say ‘No, I don’t want all of this’.

So, that’s a very convenient surrender that we do. It’s like a deal-making that ‘I surrender and now this storm should not come’. But the storm could be the fruit of your surrender. It could come because you surrendered it, and it could be getting released. You see? In this way, instead of saying ‘It is going’ we say ‘It is coming’. Then it stays; if we say that ‘It is coming’ we have so much power in our belief that it becomes real.

So, what would be good is to see ‘What are these thoughts saying’? Because there is something…, even for you now. If there is something that says that ‘This is what it is’ and you end up giving it your belief again and again, then what is the identity which is still there? Could be mother identity, could be seeker identity; these are some of the strong ones.

Second Q: It’s the sticky ones, though. Seems like the last thoughts.”  Yes. “Really sticky.

Yes. So one thing also you all must remember is that: In every moment, You are Free. And this is true for everyone. Everyone is Free every moment. At best, we have the power to believe, to pretend to be something that we are not. But in reality, nothing has changed. So, even if this belief comes, it does not affect anything in reality. That is the Peace of God, you see, as The Course in Miracles says; that ‘Nothing real can be threatened. Nothing unreal has ever existed’.

Nothing real can be threatened.

Nothing unreal has ever existed.

Herein lies the Peace of God.

So then, even if belief goes…, if you spend 10 million more lifetimes believing yourself to be a ‘person’, it is nothing to You actually.

Second Q: It just feels like suffering, but even the sufferer is seen; not real. Such maya!!

And it is your own maya. This maya also is your own creation. You see, you will come to the realization that even this maya is your pet. It is dancing for your entertainment. It does not seem like that because, as part of the entertainment package that you ordered, you also ordered this thing where you will learn something; you will learn to transcend everything that you are not. So it’s an ‘edu-entertainment’ package that you ordered. [Laughs] And if this was not to happen…, suppose nothing got your belief but some identity was still there, you know?  …, and this shows up like 20 years later. By then, you’d started satsang, and people are coming to you. Something happens 20 years later, something pops up and says ‘Hey, I’m still here!’ and you have a big following with thousands of people. And then one day you wake up and say ‘Oh, I’m still really seeking. I haven’t really got it. I’ve only been fooling myself.’  Hmmm? Interesting story, but I don’t think we wish that for you. [Laughs]

Second Q: So let it all come now.

So, let it all come now. Exactly.

Second Q: [Inaudible]

So just know that Life knows what it is doing. And Life will push every button which is still there. That is Grace. And if you can accept that it is Grace, then no problem.

So, what happens when a storm comes? What is our attitude towards a storm? If our attitude is going to be ‘Oh, no. It’s back!’  …, or is it that we are more like ‘Whoa. Where did this come from? This is here? Wow. Let’s look at this.’

Second Q: Sometimes in the storm, there is no power to even look. It’s just that I’m pulled into it, and because of the identification, I feel like ‘I’m that’ and it’s not good; whatever.

Yes. Yes. So, if there’s still such strong identity, then you can identify, and say ‘What is that?’ Is it seeker or mother? These are the two…

Second Q: No, actually, it’s funny; it’s actually ‘the Daughter-in-law’ identity.

[Laughs] Another classic one.

Second Q: No, no, there’s absolutely no bad relation…, it’s very good. But I don’t know where all of this is coming from. It’s probably from …, somewhere, some stuff somewhere.

These feelings of approval, the sense of being liked, the sense of being a good identity; whatever it is. And you know there is no ‘Daughter-in-law’… [Laughs]

Second Q: No. I’m nothing. But the identity is there…

Where is it? [Laughs]

What is the identity about? What does it say? See, when we say ‘Identity is there’ also it’s like a mythical thing. It doesn’t actually exist. It’s just some…, it’s like a voice… ‘You should be this way’. ‘This is what your in-laws should be like, or what kind of Daughter-in-law you should be’. Just ‘the same guy’.

Second Q: It’s about doership here, actually; and ‘me’ doing it, wanting my own space, or whatever. That ‘me’ is still there.

This ‘me’ is not there.

Stop watching right now! [Laughs] Can you stop watching? Stop witnessing anything. Don’t be a witness to anything at all. When the mind hears the instruction ‘Be a witness’ it presumes that it is a particular state that we must stay in. But when we invert this, when we say ‘Stop being the witness’… ‘Stop being the witness’…, then what do you say? Can you stop? Who can stop witnessing right now?

“Yes, Father. Our nature is witnessing.”

So, then what is needed to be done? If our nature is witnessing, and we cannot stop, then what is required?

Another Q: “Yes, I can stop.”

Okay. So we’ll hear more about this. Can you elaborate?

Who can see that you have stopped? Who is witnessing even the stopping? If you say that; even if you presume that it is possible, who is reporting that ‘I have stopped witnessing’? Who is witnessing the stopping?

So it is not about the presence or absence of phenomenal experiences. Even the absence of phenomenon is witnessed, isn’t it? You can say there is nothing to report, nothing to see.

Q: “Nobody can see.”

Yes, it’s not a thing. It’s not a body which can see that there is nothing to report. But to say that there is nothing, there must be a witness who can say that ‘I am sure there is nothing’. It is seen, isn’t it? Like you can say whether there is the presence of a thought, or there is no thought. You are there to witness this. In the same way, you are there to witness sleep and no sleep also.

Q: “I just am.”

And who sees this ‘I am’ also? The Presence of Being, the Presence of Consciousness that ‘I am’ is present; even that is seen ultimately. Not ultimately…, let’s not even use the word ‘ultimately’ because it makes it seem like a distant conclusion that we will come to. Even this is seen, right now.

When we ask the question: ‘Can you stop being now?’ who sees that you cannot stop being; who sees that Being is here? This ‘I’. Who is this ‘I’? This ‘I’ in which even the sense of ‘I am’ takes birth?

Another Q: “I am always here to witness all phenomena and absence of phenomena.”

Yes. For this Witnessing, for this Awareness, what is the trouble? Can there be a problem?

[Silence]

And then the mind will say ‘Yes, but…., then this happens…, and this happens…, and this appears…, and this feeling comes…, or this feeling does not stay…’ And very quick, we buy it again; because it seems like a life-line. These pennies that this ego-mind is dropping seems like the last bit of security we can get. It is not true.

Previous Q: “This ‘I’ cannot be seen.”

Let us see it right now. This ‘I’ …, which it is true, it cannot be phenomenally seen, but we can see it right now. We can become aware of it right now. And that is why, again.., let’s go back to the basic questions today. So when we say: ‘Are you aware now?’ It is not a phenomenal seeing that confirms this, but it is clear that Awareness is present. So this is This Absolute, which is aware of its own Self. Awareness is Self-Aware.

This Awareness which is aware of Being, which is aware of Awareness itself; this is what You Are.

Another Q: “Father, earlier there was constant contemplation. Now although I know and feel what you say about ‘Witness’ and ‘I Am’ it feels like I can’t find difference anywhere; unless maybe I make the effort to.” Yes.

This effort is not required. But you know when you go to sleep, and you know that you woke up. So when you woke up this morning…, if I were to say ‘Around what time did you wake up?’ then you will say ‘7:00, 7:30, 8:00’…, whatever. What woke up then? It is the sense ‘I Am’ that woke up. And after you woke up as ‘I Am’ then the world wakes up. In deep sleep there was no ‘I Am’ and there was no world also.

Namaste everyone, a very warm welcome to satsang today. Moojiji ki Jai.

Rashmi is also here with us today. If she has some questions, she can ask as well. If this is your first time in satsang, the way to ask questions is through the chat window. Namaste. Welcome, welcome.

Stop watching right now! [Laughs] Can you stop watching? Stop witnessing anything. Don’t be a witness to anything at all. When the mind hears the instruction ‘Be a witness’ it presumes that it is a particular state that we must stay in. But when we invert this, when we say ‘Stop being the witness’… ‘Stop being the witness’…, then what do you say? Can you stop? Who can stop witnessing right now?

Namaste, Namaste.

Atma says, “Yes, Father. Our nature is witnessing.”

So, then what is needed to be done? If our nature is witnessing, and we cannot stop, then what is required?

Cornelia says, “Yes, I can stop.”

Okay. So we’ll hear more about this. Can you elaborate?

Who can see that you have stopped? Who is witnessing even the stopping? If you say that; even if you presume that it is possible, who is reporting that ‘I have stopped witnessing’? Who is witnessing the stopping?

So it is not about the presence or absence of phenomenal experiences. Even the absence of phenomenon is witnessed, isn’t it? You can say there is nothing to report, nothing to see.

[Cornelia], “Nobody can see.”

Yes, it’s not a thing. It’s not a body which can see that there is nothing to report. But to say that there is nothing, there must be a witness who can say that ‘I am sure there is nothing’. It is seen, isn’t it? Like you can say whether there is the presence of a thought, or there is no thought. You are there to witness this. In the same way, you are there to witness sleep and no sleep also.

Yes, and then Cornelia says, “I just am.”

And who sees this ‘I am’ also? The Presence of Being, the Presence of Consciousness that ‘I am’ is present; even that is seen ultimately. Not ultimately…, let’s not even use the word ‘ultimately’ because it makes it seem like a distant conclusion that we will come to. Even this is seen, right now.

When we ask the question: ‘Can you stop being now?’ who sees that you cannot stop being; who sees that Being is here? This ‘I’. Who is this ‘I’? This ‘I’ in which even the sense of ‘I am’ takes birth?

Atma says, “I am always here to witness all phenomena and absence of phenomena.”  Yes.

For this Witnessing, for this Awareness, what is the trouble? Can there be a problem?

[Silence]

And then the mind will say ‘Yes, but…., then this happens…, and this happens…, and this appears…, and this feeling comes…, or this feeling does not stay…’ And very quick, we buy it again; because it seems like a life-line. These pennies that this ego-mind is dropping seems like the last bit of security we can get. It is not true.

Cornelia says, “This ‘I’ cannot be seen.”

Let us see it right now. This ‘I’ …, which it is true, it cannot be phenomenally seen, but we can see it right now. We can become aware of it right now. And that is why, again.., let’s go back to the basic questions today. So when we say: ‘Are you aware now?’ It is not a phenomenal seeing that confirms this, but it is clear that Awareness is present. So this is This Absolute, which is aware of its own Self. Awareness is Self-Aware.

Namaste, Aradhana. No worries. Welcome.

This Awareness which is aware of Being, which is aware of Awareness itself; this is what You Are.

Ishani says, “Father, earlier there was constant contemplation. Now although I know and feel what you say about ‘Witness’ and ‘I Am’ it feels like I can’t find difference anywhere; unless maybe I make the effort to.” Yes.

This effort is not required. But you know when you go to sleep, and you know that you woke up. So when you woke up this morning…, if I were to say ‘Around what time did you wake up?’ then you will say ‘7:00, 7:30, 8:00’…, whatever. What woke up then? It is the sense ‘I Am’ that woke up. And after you woke up as ‘I Am’ then the world wakes up. In deep sleep there was no ‘I Am’ and there was no world also. This is good.

And then Ishani says, “Contemplate-like mind is sleeping in surrender.”

It’s very good. Let it sleep. And now we’re not fearful of it waking up. We’re not afraid of what it is going to say also. That is Freedom. Freedom is not a state where we’re afraid of what the mind is going to say next.

[Rashmi] “It’s what’s going on here. It’s a fear of the mind.”

A fear of the mind, yes. What is the worst that the mind can do? It will question your freedom.

[Rashmi] “It’s just saying ‘You’re going to fail miserably’. Even though I know it’s not true; it’s like, there’s so much clarity, and then the storm just comes, and it’s…, somehow, I’m believing that. And then the suffering starts.”

So, always what could happen is that…, if you do a post mortem saying ‘There was clarity, and then storm came’ it means nothing actually. So there was an expectation that storm will not come now; or even if storm comes, why does it get my belief?

[Rashmi] “Yeah, that’s the second one.”

Okay. It’s the second one. Earlier it could have been the first. Now it has become ‘Okay, storm comes but I should not be able to believe it’. There’s still lurking this concept of ‘the Free one’ who should now not even believe something. But in the now, what is it? Who is that one who believed? Where is it now? It does not exist.

Our memory is the most unreliable thing; like we say in satsang, no? Like, we land in a dream in the middle of a situation…, most times we don’t say ‘Oh, where have I come? Who are these people?’ They feel familiar; we seem to have a history with them. We know who they are. So there is memory also of those characters which we’ve never met before. So, how reliable can this memory be? Every moment fresh…

[Rashmi] “Sometimes I feel it’s just hard to drop the vibe. I mean I know I have to drop the next thought. It’s just, once it gets your attention and belief actually, it just seems so much effort to drop it.”  Yes. “And that creates more fear.”

But that is also good, because if there are some thoughts which still get our belief, then that means that there is some identity which has not been transcended yet.

[Rashmi] “I asked to surrender it, and then the storm came. It’s just like you say…, you surrender it, and then you say ‘No, I don’t want all of this’.”

So, that’s a very convenient surrender that we do. It’s like a deal-making that ‘I surrender and now this storm should not come’. But the storm could be the fruit of your surrender. It could come because you surrendered it, and it could be getting released. You see? In this way, instead of saying ‘It is going’ we say ‘It is coming’. Then it stays; if we say that ‘It is coming’ we have so much power in our belief that it becomes real.

So, what would be good is to see ‘What are these thoughts saying’? Because there is something…, even for you now. If there is something that says that ‘This is what it is’ and you end up giving it your belief again and again, then what is the identity which is still there? Could be mother identity, could be seeker identity; these are some of the strong ones.

[Rashmi] “It’s the sticky ones, though. Seems like the last thoughts.”  Yes. “Really sticky.” Yes.

So one thing also you all must remember is that: In every moment, You are Free. And this is true for everyone. Everyone is Free every moment. At best, we have the power to believe, to pretend to be something that we are not. But in reality, nothing has changed. So, even if this belief comes, it does not affect anything in reality. That is the Peace of God, you see, as The Course in Miracles says; that ‘Nothing real can be threatened. Nothing unreal has ever existed’.

‘Nothing real can be threatened.

Nothing unreal has ever existed.

Herein lies the Peace of God.’

So then, even if belief goes…, if you spend 10 million more lifetimes believing yourself to be a ‘person’, it is nothing to You actually.

[Rashmi] “It just feels like suffering, but even the sufferer is seen; not real. Such maya!!”

And it is your own maya. This maya also is your own creation. You see, you will come to the realization that even this maya is your pet. It is dancing for your entertainment. It does not seem like that because, as part of the entertainment package that you ordered, you also ordered this thing where you will learn something; you will learn to transcend everything that you are not. So it’s an ‘edu-entertainment’ package that you ordered. [Laughs] And if this was not to happen…, suppose nothing got your belief but some identity was still there, you know?  …, and this shows up like 20 years later. By then, you’d started satsang, and people are coming to you. Something happens 20 years later, something pops up and says ‘Hey, I’m still here!’ and you have a big following with thousands of people. And then one day you wake up and say ‘Oh, I’m still really seeking. I haven’t really got it. I’ve only been fooling myself.’  Hmmm? Interesting story, but I don’t think we wish that for you. [Laughs]

[Rashmi] [Laughs] “So let it all come now.”

So, let it all come now. Exactly.

[Rashmi] [Inaudible]

So just know that Life knows what it is doing. And Life will push every button which is still there. That is Grace. And if you can accept that it is Grace, then no problem.

So, what happens when a storm comes? What is our attitude towards a storm? If our attitude is going to be ‘Oh, no. It’s back!’  …, or is it that we are more like ‘Whoa. Where did this come from? This is here? Wow. Let’s look at this.’

[Rashmi] “Sometimes in the storm, there is no power to even look. It’s just that I’m pulled into it, and because of the identification, I feel like ‘I’m that’ and it’s not good; whatever.”

Yes. Yes. So, if there’s still such strong identity, then you can identify, and say ‘What is that?’ Is it seeker or mother? These are the two…

[Rashmi] “No, actually, it’s funny; it’s actually ‘the Daughter-in-law’ identity.”

[Laughs] Another classic one.

[Rashmi] “No, no, there’s absolutely no bad relation…, it’s very good. But I don’t know where all of this is coming from. It’s probably from …, somewhere, some stuff somewhere.”

These feelings of approval, the sense of being liked, the sense of being a good identity; whatever it is. And you know there is no ‘Daughter-in-law’… [Laughs]

[Rashmi] “No. I’m nothing. But the identity is there…”

Where is it? [Laughs]

[Rashmi] [Silence]

What is the identity about? What does it say? See, when we say ‘Identity is there’ also it’s like a metical thing. It doesn’t actually exist. It’s just some…, it’s like a voice… ‘You should be this way’. ‘This is what your in-laws should be like, or what kind of Daughter-in-law you should be’. Just ‘the same guy’.

[Rashmi] “It’s about doership here, actually; and ‘me’ doing it, wanting my own space, or whatever. That ‘me’ is still there.”

This ‘me’ is not there.

Okay, let’s catch up on the chat.

Atma says, “I want to say this; that this Presence is more felt here, or better to say, it is easier to be felt when night is coming, and during the evening and night. Then there is no light of the day. Then I feel it deeper. Can you say something about this?”  Yes.

This can happen sometimes, you see, where some part of it is also our prior conditioning. So suppose we used to do some sadhana later in the night. Like, I used to contemplate, do a lot of self-inquiry in the night, so even now when I’m going off to sleep, automatically this question is coming up, you see? ‘Who am I? Who am I?’ is still coming up, and everything seems to get very quiet. So, some of it could be like that. Otherwise, day or night actually makes no difference; but in the play of this, it can function like this. It is nothing to be concerned about. Just enjoy the times where it just seems automatic. Also it’s like sitting on the banks of the Ganga or in the Presence of Arunachala; the mind is automatically quiet. So in the leela, there are times and places where this mind does not have too much power. That is absolutely perfect.

Yes, you say, “When the absence of mind is felt easier”.  Yes.

So in these holy places, at certain times of the day …, and in India we also have this concept of Brahma Muhurta; like Jyoti from the US said once that 4:30, 4:00-6:00 in the morning is an auspicious time. It can be like that.

Cornelia says, “Sometimes, if I witness, I cannot work so I just do my job. Obviously there is a kind of witnessing there because I’m conscious.”  Yes.

You see, the trick in this…, now I found your question. Because you feel that there is an entity which is witnessing; you feel there is an entity whose job is to witness. Actually what I am saying is that this Witnessing is what You Are. You are not a thing at all. If you are the Witnessing itself, then what effort would be needed to be witnessing? But if you presume that ‘I am an entity who needs to do this witnessing thing’ then it becomes a practice. There is nothing you can do to stop the witnessing. It cannot go away. That’s why I say: Drop all effort. No effort is required. Even in the most deeply identified situations…, where Rashmi, suppose she was just saying ‘I’m just Daughter-in-law. I’m nothing else’. Even in that, she cannot become that. Even in that, that Witnessing is ever-present.

[Rashmi] “So I know that … [inaudible]… Why does it feel like you’re not what you are? What is that?”

The feeling …, a thought or a feeling cannot testify to what You Are. You see, that’s a mistake we make. So, first in satsang, we try to get the mind to testify that what is being spoken is true. Then after a few satsangs, we realize that this mind is not going to testify to the truth. But I’m so used to then following these feelings of Joy, these feelings of Peace, feelings of Bliss to say that ‘I’m now right’. See, we’re getting now…, wanting a sense of approval from our feelings. But the feeling that is coming up could be, like, sticky or discomfort or anything like that; then we are quick to interpret these feelings to say that ‘I still haven’t got it’. But feeling is just feeling; thought is just thought. They mean nothing to You.

[Rashmi] “My question is ‘What is delusion?’ What…?”

Delusion is just believing the interpreter. As simple as that. You see? Ultimately believing that the interpreter is Me; it is My own voice.

[Rashmi] “I’m just trying to see…, you know, is there something tangible to it?”

No. You see, many, many seekers have looked for millions and millions of years to find some tangibility to this concept of ego or person; and nobody has ever been able to find it. Not one attribute they can find. It just is not truth. But if we are reliant on ‘I should feel that this is true’ then we are expecting a feeling to come up and confirm; or ‘I should think now only true thoughts’. It does not happen like that.

Zoe says, [Laughs] “Rashmi, I think we might be the same person.”

Yes. [Laughs] It is all ‘the same guy’. But you are not that. I know she is joking.

Denan says, “Yes, yes. Here, too.” I knew the daughter-in-law thing was going to get some response. Good. She says, “Being good”.

[Rashmi] “It was lurking somewhere. It’s a very good relationship, but now I see that there are things stuck. And there actually was a thing yesterday in the evening so I was like ‘Okay… [inaudible]…I don’t want to burst out…[inaudible]”

Nothing can happen.

[Rashmi] “The Presence and the Awareness came back…, when I first saw it I caught it; seeing what my Being was. It just quickly got bypassed. Like, really, there’s no interest in just Being; even there’s a space in which everything comes, thoughts come, attention to the thoughts come. And then the mind comes. I mean, a lot of people do give importance to the …, nothing wrong, right or wrong; but then it says ‘You are not doing it right. You’re not [inaudible]. It’s like all this nonsense comes up and then …”

And you’re not the only one that had this. Om also at one point said…, because here we don’t even emphasize so much; because most spiritual paths there’s so much emphasis with the practice; being with the sense ‘I am’ and all of that. Here we quickly, quickly get into the Absolute. So I see no trouble. You are the Absolute itself. So why must you have this middle stop, and this stop: to be with the Presence and then let it become something.

[Rashmi] “I didn’t even try, it just…”  Yes. “I just… [inaudible]”

So it’s like breathing. Breathing is present. In many paths, Buddhism, they’ll say ‘Okay, do mindful breathing. Spend many years with this mindfulness of breathing. Be with the breath’. So it has its place; it has its place for whomever needs to hear that will hear that. If it is Freedom that you want in your Heart then you will go to the one who will tell you what you need to get there.

So this feeling that ‘I’m not in the Presence of Being, I’m not in the Presence of Consciousness or God…, You are! Because you cannot stop being, like you cannot stop breathing. You can stop for a few seconds, but the Presence is always here. What you’re saying is you’re not so interested in it. And that is okay.

[Rashmi] “Sometimes I try to pay attention to it, because, I don’t know…, it’s the mind again. And when it doesn’t work, it’s just like…”

Yes. And how, when we chase it, it seems like there is distraction. That’s why I say that it’s easier to say ‘Okay, I’m going to stop being.” [Laughs] Then we see that it cannot be stopped. Then what must we be chasing?

Being arises within You. Therefore You are prior even to Being.

Ishani says, “Yesterday I went into a laughing fit about how I was so concerned about a story that never happened, and about rectifying areas in myself which were never real.”  Yes. [Laughs]

Rashmi says, “You should have recorded the laughing fit.”

So whether we’re talking about the entire story of our life, or whether we’re talking about a particular identification story, it is all the same. Nothing needs to be done.

Atma says, “Thank you, Father. Yes, it is automatic.”

Cornelia says, “Yes, now I understand. Thank you, Father.”  This is very good.

Zoe says, “My mother-in-law is coming around to babysit this evening, and the house is unnaturally clean. Must be some kind of identity here.”

Rashmi says, “Yes. We are the same person.”  [She and Ananta laugh]

Remember that it is about neutrality. So even if you find, for some unexplained reason you are cleaning the house, you’re still only the witness of it. It is the ego which comes post facto and says ‘You did this because this one is coming. You are this; you are still identified’. Just like when a thought comes, the ego comes and says ‘It is your thought’. Same way with action also.

I think most of you now have seen that video where the trigger for the action to happen happens even before the thought about the action comes. For those of you who missed it, there was a BBC documentary which was tracking this relationship between thought and action. And what they realized was that the brain, or whatever trigger is required for the action to happen is already sent a few seconds even before the thought came that ‘This must be done’. So what does that tell us? It tells us that ‘I am not the thinker of thought or the doer of action’. All that is happening is happening.

Aradhana says, “No commas or semi-colons on the distance-less journey back home to the Absolute.”

It’s so easy because we start at the destination. In this journey, we start at the destination. And even when we are pretending to run about; to do this and do that, we still never left the destination. That’s why we say that it is not even that the fish is thirsting for water; it is the water which is thirsting for water.

Zoe says, “It is all nothing, nothing, nothing.”

There are so many of these lines; if any of them are just accepted, it is over. So anything that the mind says: Nothing! Whatever it could be saying.

Ivan says, “Father, it is still not clear this question of ‘Are you aware?’ There is an emptiness which is recognized because the mind doesn’t understand the question, I would say.”  Yes.

Ah, don’t make too much heavy work out of it. Just pretend if you were a five-year-old; just a small child who had not read any Advaita books or attended any satsang, and the question is asked ‘Are you aware now?’ [Silence, looking into camera] And if you were not to refer to your mind, then immediately it is seen that ‘Yes, awareness is here’.

But if you give this question also to the mind…, so although we try to remove all complexity from it…, but even if this is given to the mind, it will create some contradiction, some doubt, some confusion.

So, actually, in the three simple pointings, we’ve attempted to remove all complexity. We’ve attempted to remove all things that the mind can say to get in the way. But still, if it is given to the mind, it will come up with something. But not to worry even about this, because the trickster’s intelligence also comes from You, and You are the Supreme Intelligence.

[Rashmi] “I can see exactly where the Daughter-in-law thing is coming from now, so …, I see me in you now; and there’s a fear of seeing me in them…, if that makes sense.”

‘I see me in you now…’

[Rashmi] “Like when I see you, I see me…, I can’t explain that; but there’s a fear of seeing me in them; like we are one.”

Yes. So what it means is that ‘When I see you, when I see the Master, that everything is so clear’. Is it like that?

[Rashmi] “I feel like I’m seeing through your eyes; I’m seeing myself through your eyes.”

Yes, and what do you see? When you see yourself through my eyes, what do you see?

[Rashmi] “Nothing… [Laughs] Just seeing…”

And what is the fear if you were to see yourself through their eyes? You will see the judgments about you? Is that the fear?

[Rashmi] “Fear is the separation won’t exist. I don’t know…, it’s just made up, I think…. Because until now, it was them and me. But now, there’s no difference. I don’t know if it makes sense.”

Yes. So, it’s seeming a little like ‘level confusion’. You see? Have you heard this term before: ‘Level confusion’?  It’s very common for the mind to play this ‘level confusion’ trick. So, if oneness is seen, then everything will be seen as one. It is not part of the appearance which will appear; ‘Oh, these are humans, therefore this is one with me’.

So, this Beingness arises, and all of this will be seen as a projection of this Being. It will not be that ‘Oh, I’m one with you specifically, but I’m not one with this table’. Because all of it is Me; it is my own projection. So, what happens is that it’s becoming a personal sense of oneness, with the Master or with others, so it’s seen that way. So that is not really oneness. Oneness means that all that is appearing is just appearing in my light, therefore it is mine.

[Rashmi] “So it is a conclusion that ‘therefore it is mine’ or it’s actually seen to be?”

Seen to be. When Being exists, this exists. When Being does not exist, nothing exists; no phenomena exists. So then when we say ‘Oneness’ then it is for everything.

So what is smelling a little bit ‘off’ is a little bit like a projected oneness; that ‘I want to be one with this Being, but if I’m now one with this Being, does that mean that I’ll become one with this [other] one also, which I don’t really want to be, because they have some attributes which are not so… something?’ So that is more mind playing the game of oneness.

So, drop even the concept of ‘Oneness’. Let oneness only be an insight. Don’t try to become one, or try to become separate; just drop this whole concept itself. Pretend as if you had never heard of it, you don’t know what Advaita means. No? And just keep dis-believing your next thought. Then you will see that all that is appearing is Me. There are no ‘two’.

Otherwise what will happen is that we’ll end up fragmenting this entire appearance into various levels and categories. So when the distinction…, in reality it is seen that there is no Daughter-in-law, Father-in-law, Mother-in-law, then that is Oneness. But when it is like ‘Oh, I’m the Daughter-in-law but now I see my Father-in-law as one with me’ …, that is not actually Oneness because there is still the Daughter-in-law and Father-in-law.

So when that distinction goes away; but still very naturally, the Self can play those roles. So you can sense that all of it is just a projection in Me, but still the Father role can be played from here without any effort. So to the child it might seem like ‘This one is really being a Father’ but you know in your heart that you didn’t pick up that identity and it is automatically flowing.

It’s like, even in satsang, the Teacher…, (these words are coming up, so I’ll say them)…, the Masters also get into trouble because they pick up the Master identity. So, the instrument identity or the instrument feeling is kept aside; and then they start believing ‘the person’ has become a Master now. And then the duality of Master / student comes. And then Life will show them their mirror also; what they need to see to get to their full Freedom.

But actually, there is no difference between Master and Student. It’s just that it is appearing that this body has been surrendered to Spirit to use, to the Satguru to use, and another Being is playing out as a student role. But if there is belief that ‘Oh, now I have achieved something or become something’ then that is opening the doors to suffering and identity. So, all relationships are like this.

Denan said something very nice yesterday. She said that…, ‘I’m not sure if even some speaking was happening or not; but once in a while I hear some words are coming out’. This is exactly the satsang experience. ‘I have no idea what I spoke just now, but I know some words came through, and I trust what is speaking’. So that will become true for all of us. Then it becomes effortless. Then every word from your mouth is satsang itself.

Ishani says, “Only the walls of my room have been lucky to witness the madness, but a camera will surely bring some entertainment to the world.”

All these spontaneous laughters, spontaneous crying can happen along the way.

Jayani says, “Namaste, Father and sangha. Just popping in. Will catch up later; and love you so much.”  Love you, too, my dear. Good.

Zoe also has to leave early today; probably because her mother-in-law is coming. [Smiles] So much love, so much love.

Atma says, “Same happens to me when I am reading in broadcast and have spontaneous sharing.”  Yes. This is very good.

Cornelia says, “Father, I am lost without you.”

The good news is you cannot be without me; I am You. Thank you so much as well.

Don’t wait to come to some conclusions about yourself. Don’t wait to come to a Freedom conclusion also. Be empty even of this concept.

So someone wrote the other day to one of us in the sangha saying that ‘Ananta is still sleeping, and he has some hubris’…, I think hubris was the word that they used.

Rashmi says, “What does hubris mean?”

Hubris means arrogance, or some…, delusion. But it makes no difference; it makes no difference to me. No ‘person’ can actually ever become awake; and what we really Are can never sleep. So, if ever I was to operate as Ananta-as-a-person, then I am sleeping. Makes no difference; because in reality, I cannot sleep. In reality, you cannot sleep. [Smiles]. So, I’m as much asleep as any of you; or as much awake as any of you. It’s just that the testimony coming from your mouth and my mouth could be different sometimes. There is no concept of ‘asleep’ or ‘awake’ for me. And my constant prayer always is that ‘If there is arrogance here, let it be exposed and let me feel the full suffering for it right now’. There is no fear of suffering. And I know that arrogance will lead to suffering. But suffering is now also seen as Grace. So, ‘Let it come. Let it please come right now’.

Who is awake and who is asleep? Any time there is belief in the ‘person’ it is called ‘sleep’. And as Amaya is saying, any time the next thought is dropped, that is called ‘awake’. But in actuality, it is still always only ‘awake’. I cannot say that anyone is ‘asleep’. And yet, I’m completely open to hearing when someone says ‘Ananta is asleep’. Makes no difference.

That is another example of ‘Level confusion’. But what we are speaking of is the reality for ALL. But when Self-realization has been made this stamp: ‘Certified Self-Realized’ then there are people handing out certificates of freedom or not. It’s the funniest thing. That’s why I said that even if you could be deeply identified as a ‘person’, does that change what you really are? It doesn’t. You’re just having fun. [Laughs]. You know?

It’s like if I had bought tickets to a movie and go to a movie, does it change who I am? It doesn’t.

Amaya says, “Father, there is such gratitude for ‘Don’t believe your next thought’.”  Yes. It’s very beautiful. “Nothing can survive it. It does seem, though, that it is me that sort of needs to grab myself and do it; remind myself ‘Don’t believe it!’ Any words on this? Imaginary one employed to deal with the imaginary one. J ”

Yes, yes, yes. It can seem like this. And Bhagavan [Ramana Maharshi] said it very beautifully when he said that this is the thorn. So, ‘This is my thorn which I am giving to you’. It is still a thorn, like you say. It is still a thorn, but it will remove all the other thorns; and then you will throw even this. And you know in your Heart that if some thorn is coming up, then this one can be employed. But if there’s nothing, no pain, no sense of any suffering at all, then even this is not required. Because we’ve had a long time of conditioning, of believing thought, sometimes these tools are needed; they seem to be needed in this play actually. But even this ultimately will be thrown away.

Aradhana says, “The one who sees hubris in the ‘other’ is perhaps projecting what is present in the Being there. If there is truth here, all reflected is the truth. Wonderful, this maya.”  Yes.

You know, many years ago…, this just reminded me of something. Many years ago there was this site…, I don’t know whether it’s still around. It’s called the ‘Guru rating site’. Have any of you ever seen it? It was a Guru rating site which became very popular. So, they had various ratings. And I was just listening to Mooji youtubes, and I’d not met him. [Laughs]: (I don’t think I’ve looked at that site since I met him). And I was so attracted by the Mooji videos and it spoke so clearly to me. Yet there Mooji was not even mentioned, or he had like a ½ a star or something. Who are these people? What are they doing? So the mind can use, you know, even these kind of things to distract us from what is really true. So the mind feels a sense of superiority by saying ‘Even the Gurus I will rate now. This Master is a 5 star Master, and this Master is…’ something else. It’s all part of the play. It’s all okay. [Laughs]

Ishani says, “Too much Love for arrogance to exist in this sangha.”  Yes.

Amaya says, “Thank you for satsang.” Very welcome, my dear. “Love to you and sangha.”   So much love.   “Good answer,” she says.

Charles has seen the site; the Guru rating site. [Big smile]

Cornelia says, “Can’t stop these tears. Thank you, Father, for the beautiful satsang. So much love, dearest Father and Sangha.”  So much love to you, too.

Ah, Shinein, not Ishani. Shinein / Julio said, “Too much Love for arrogance to exist in this sangha.” Very good.

Charles says, “It is Grace for any comprehension to take place.” Yes.

Aradhana said, “Shinein is Julio.”  Yes, yes.

Jayani says, “Father, Grace brings the ‘Don’t believe the next thought’ thought. So much Grace. Grace brings identification and its undoing.”

Yes. It’s all Grace. Once this is seen; everything is Grace. Mother-in-law is Grace, Father-in-law is Grace, Daughter-in-law is Grace.  Just enjoy the movie.

Love you, Julio. Thank you so much. Adam, thank you so much. Love you, too.

Ishani, thank you so much.

Thank you all so very much for a beautiful satsang today.

Moojiji ki Jai! [Namaste] [Blows kiss and waves].

Sangha: Moojiji ki Jai ! Anantaji ki Jai ! Thank you. Love you.

Namaste everyone, a very warm welcome to satsang today. Moojiji ki Jai.

Thank you all so very much for joining in. And if this is your first time in satsang, the way to ask questions is through the chat window. I can’t see any chat, so I’m wondering if this is working. Maybe I’ll refresh the page. Ah, I see it now. Very good. Namaste, Namaste, everyone. Namaste. Welcome, welcome, welcome.

No matter what the mind is saying; the mind could be saying anything, but you’re only just watching. You are the watching, actually. But all that you are doing is watching. You all see this? This is what it means when we say that ‘You are not the thinker of thought, and you are not the doer of action’. You are the Seeing, the Witnessing, the pure Awareness. Just the pure Witnessing of all that arises; and the pure Witnessing even of the emptiness itself…, the Witnessing of phenomena and the Witnessing of Space in which phenomena arises.

Hello, welcome. So much love, Amba. Very good.

And this pure Witnessing is untouched, completely, by even your own action…, your seeming-own action. Even the actions are watched; You are the Watching alone. Even the sensory watching is witnessed. All sensory perceptions are also witnessed by You. Sensory perceiving is witnessed by you. You perceive even perception through the senses.

Now what must you do to become free?

Atma says, “Yes, even watching is witnessed.”  Yes.

So, when we say ‘watching’ or ‘perceiving’ some confusion can arise, where we can mistake sensory watching, sensory witnessing, to be the pure Awareness itself. So the advantage of the word Awareness is that is makes it clear that Awareness is aware of even this process of perception. You are aware that you are looking at a computer. You are aware that you’re listening to satsang. This Awareness is what You Are.

Thank you, my dear. Thank you. Stacy, thank you so much. Namaste, Namaste.

Where must Awareness go to become free?

What must Awareness do to become free?

What mountain must be climbed for this understanding to come? Which practice must be done to find out whether you are aware now? All of this is nothing, nothing, nothing.

Yes, so simple, isn’t it? As long as we don’t believe the ‘but…, but…, but…’ it remains this simple actually. As long as we don’t believe any doubt, it remains this simple.

Welcome, Soham. Namaste.

You cannot become the imagined one, the false one. It is impossible. For you to become the ego is impossible. You see this to be true, or not? You can type out. Do you this, what I am saying, to be true or not? In this moment.

Jesse says, “Impossible for the unreal to be real.”  Yes.

Atma says, “Heart full…, full of joy.”  Very good.

Shanti says, “Absolutely. Yes, yes, yes.”

So many ‘Yes’ coming [through chat responses]. Very good! Yes, very good. All of you said ‘Yes’. Now, don’t believe a ‘but…’ Don’t believe any doubt. This power of belief you have. This power of belief you have. After the ‘Yes’ don’t believe anything else; and you are Free Now. Even this does not require any belief. We are not interested in the concept of freedom.

Atma is kidding with me now, I hope. Oh, she is saying, “No but…”  So, no ‘buts’ she means. No more ‘buts’, no more doubt. When I read first ‘No but’ I felt she was going to say ‘No, but … something’. [Laughs]. No more ‘buts’. Yes.

It is so clear for you now. You have understood so clearly. How is it possible to believe a doubt?

Atma said, “I already forgot what you asked.”

How is it possible for you to believe a doubt?

Which doubt are you still believing?

What are you still resisting?

If there is something, don’t try to hide it or deny it. Best to expose it.

Soham says, “Constant buffering, so will have to watch recording after all. Love you, Father.”  Love you, too, my dear.

Is it buffering too much for all of you, or is it just for Soham? ‘No buffering’. Okay. It’s fine for everyone else.

Atma says, “Impossible to believe a doubt.”

Yes. And even if something gets believed temporarily, it is fine.

Jesse said, “Is it that when a doubt is believed, it is believing itself, and we are that which watches it?”

This is an excellent question. So he says ‘What happens when a doubt is believed? Who is believing this doubt?’ It is…, from this pure Seeing, there is this Being which emerges as Consciousness, which gives birth to all this phenomenal experiencing, phenomenal entities appearing. This Beingness itself starts believing, or deluding itself to believe these thoughts. It is Consciousness itself. There is actually nothing else. And ultimately this Consciousness is nothing but the Awareness itself.

So the doubt or a thought doesn’t have the power of belief. It is only Consciousness itself which has the power of attention and belief.

Shanti says, “The real cannot be doubted. The unreal has no substance to believe or doubt. Everything that is seen is doubtful with a doubter; but when no doubter is there then how can there be doubt? Does this make sense?”  Yes. Completely. Yes.

Then it is seen to be a ‘wrong number’. Even when this doubt comes, there is no one to take hold of it; no one to accept this package of doubt. There is nobody home. The phone is not being picked up now. Doubt can keep calling you, but you know it is not for you; you know the call is not for you.

So, on the ‘Smart phones’ these days, you can block, isn’t it? [Laughs] You can just press a button and block this caller. Can you block this caller? And block means what? Just don’t believe anything it has to say.

It’s like this Telesales person, you see? In India we have a lot of these call centers now, where there are hundreds and hundreds of youngsters who are selling things all over the world on the telephone. [Laughs]. And this Telesales person says ‘Buy this, and you will be happy; and just buy this one and you will be happy; and buy this and you will be happy.’ And you have believed this sales pitch for hundreds and hundreds of deals, and all we have got is misery. So now refuse to believe this sales pitch. Send the sales person in your head to the unemployment line. [Laughs] Nothing at all is useful in any of its deals and offers. [Silence] It is as simple as that. The ego cannot survive your disbelief.

Namaste, Lizelle.

Ustreamer111 says, “Father, all that is left is just a play of words. Beings throwing words at me; big, small. Can words be dropped also?”  Yes. Yes.

So, in this…, it’s very good what you say. But just be careful not to believe the interpretation of any action. Remember that life knows exactly what it is doing. Life know exactly what it is doing. And if there is a sense of aversion, even with words, even that will be transcended. All desires and aversions will be transcended; not even a blade of grass you will carry. Words or no words makes no difference to you.

You said ‘All that is left is just a play of words’. And this play of words also won’t bother you. ‘Beings throwing words at me; big, small. Can words also be dropped?’ Yes. Dropping means to not believe any thought about it. Then you can be in the most noisy marketplace, or you can be on Facebook which is pretty much the same thing, and Beings can be saying all kinds of things to you but it makes no difference. Everything is flowing on its own. And even in the most noisy or quiet of places, you are just the Witnessing itself. The Witnessing is never agitated; the Witnessing has no aversion. It allows all that is required to play out to play out.

Atma says, “So beautifully said: ‘The ego cannot survive your disbelief’.”  Yes.

It is as simple as this. Simple, simple, simple. ‘The ego cannot survive your disbelief.

Charles says, “Yes, the ego finds it very frustrating not having a ‘but’ to play with.”  Yes.

See, it’s hanging onto these ‘buts’, it is hanging onto these doubts. And it tries hard to make you believe this is true, that it’s really bothering you. Actually, nothing can bother you. Nothing can bother You. Nothing has ever happened to You. This is very good.

Jyoti says, “Anantaji, I have folks around me who are so good at ‘subject’. I am trying to ramp up on this new work, and there is a background feeling that they are so good, and I’m no good. How to not believe this feeling? I’m yet trying to understand how not to believe.”

So, she says ‘I am trying to ramp up on this new work, and there are others who are so good at this subject’ Then you say ‘There is this background feeling that they are so good, and I’m no good.’  This ‘I’ who is no good does not exist. Those ‘I’s who are so good also do not exist. So, don’t force this understanding about ‘others’…, whether they exist or not. First find out: Whose complaint is this? Who is no good? What are you referring to yourself as?

See, this understanding will percolate through all aspects of life. You will be see that you don’t need to become a person in any environment. You were only pretending anyway. Can you find this ‘I’ who is no good?

Shanti says, “Yes, just play. Words, sounds, sights, sensations, etc. All play.”  Yes.

Ajnani says, “Words are sound pulsations; no need to believe in them.”  Yes.

Zoe says, “One of my children is often very troubled; and the idea that I should be doing more to help him is very sticky. The guilt also. Laying this at your holy feet, Father.”

In your freedom…, your freedom from suffering; your Joy, your Love, your Peace, is the best gift you can give all those who are in your Presence. You are giving them the highest gift. You’re giving this gift to the entire Universe.

Also, this does not mean that you must not do anything specifically to help also. It does not mean that. That is why we say we are speaking of the beautiful neutrality; not a doing or a not-doing. You see that all action can flow through also, with no intent, no desire and no aversion. All will happen on its own. Don’t believe any of the stories of the mind.

So much love, Ram. Welcome.

Stacy says, “So if there is no real doubt without the believer, then doubt cannot truly be.”

Yes. It is never true. No thought is ever true. Just another appearance.

Then you say, “We are not believer, but that which Sees the arising of doubt; and that’s it.”

Yes. Not sure the way you meant the ‘That’s it’ but this is a very natural response, isn’t it…, ‘Oh, That’s It !” I was expecting the Supreme One to be Supreme in Its appearance also. And here I’m saying that the Supreme One has no appearance. Is it a subject and not an object; even to say ‘subject’ is not valid for it. It is the Awareness of all subject-object relationships.

Jayani says, “Mother identity, and the idea that I need to do something for a demanding child; guilt and trying to be a good mom story all just noise in the fire.”  Very good.

The appearance of a person can do nothing at all. How can imagination do something? The imagined one cannot do something even phenomenally. All identities are just imagined. And the Self has no trouble playing any of these roles also. No intervention from the mind is required.

Jesse says, “So, when we are a believer, all suffering arises?”

In your anything phenomenal, in your any concept, then it is an invitation for suffering to arise, because this misbelief will not be carried perpetually. And suffering is grace which lets you drop this misbelief. Any concept you pick up is an open invitation for suffering.

Atma says, “Yes. Freedom is the best gift.”

How many children in the world…, how many children in this apparent-world, this realm, will say that…, will have the grace of having self-realized parents? How many will have? What better gift can you give your children?

Jayani says, “Just lost you.”  I hope it’s okay for everyone.

Ustreamer111 says, “Father, the stories are not forming, as all that comes gets wiped out. The sound of tick tock. Invisible issues of Beings and targets; kind of force to listen and answer.”  Yes.

Drop all effort. No force. Then you will see that listening is happening on its own, and the answers are also coming on their own. No effort is required. Then every word that you say is satsang. Every word that you say will be dipped in Grace when you let it arise from your Heart on its own; with no effort, no force and no fear.

Namaste, Louise. Welcome.

Vivi says, “Jayani, same noise, in the fire; a demanding child and mother’s identity. Very grateful.”  Very good.

Jesse says, “So that is how we know when we believe ourselves to be a person, when suffering is felt, yes?”

Yes. That is why my Master says ‘Suffering is God’s alarm clock’. Suffering is God’s alarm clock. It wakes us up from this identity. Very good.

Zoe says, “I am at your feet, beloved Father. So much gratitude.”  So much love, my dear.

Atma says, “My children are the entire world.”  Very beautiful; very good.

[Silence]

~~~

[The rest of satsang is about proposed new satsang format including Skype or Google video, so that satsang questioner can show up on video interactively]:

One idea I wanted to share with you also is that this kind of interaction is good, but sometimes I feel that, you know, it lacks the interactivity to be complete in some sense. So I was feeling that…, Is it possible for us to do the broadcast and at the same time, keep skype on, and then if someone has a burning question then that interaction can happen on skype as well. And for everyone else, they can see the interaction, or at least hear the entire interaction. So I was feeling to try this experiment one of these days. What are your feelings about it? I’m not even sure if the bandwidth will work properly with both Ustream and Skype on at the same time, but I feel that this could be a good thing to try.

Okay, I see a lot of ‘Yes’. Okay. [Big smile]. So is there someone on Skype just now? I see.

So Jesse said, “An ad played when you answered.” The recording is there so it can also be heard. But he says, “But it is felt the answer is here by your grace.”  Very good.

Ah, Om is on Skype. Prema is also on Skype. So most of you are saying ‘Yes’. Very good.

Isabella is here, she says “Great. Will need directions, though. Not good at technology”.

Yes, we will publish the directions as well. Okay, so let me also have a look and see if we can experiment with this right away. I’m not sure what my Skype account is, to be honest. But let me see what happens. Hmmm. Seems to be stuck. Seems to be stopped. Okay, so Skype refuses to start. Maybe it’s trying to access the camera and the audio, isn’t it?

We can also do a Google video chat, or Google hang out, as Lizelle is saying. So let me quit Skype. And now if I put on the video, let’s see what happens. I’m calling Om. Om, let’s see if you get this. And let’s see if the broadcast is also on at the same time.

Om says, “Hi, Father.” I see you, but I don’t hear you. There you are. Very good. Oh, you shaved. I feel there’s no way to broadcast Om’s visual from here. Om says, “You can share the screen maybe, Father.”  Share the screen, on Ustream? I don’t know whether that’s possible. Om: [Voice very scratchy and inaudible]. Okay, if I mute it, then we can’t hear him also. Om, you need to mute, then you won’t hear me. Om says, [clearly heard], “I can hear you. I muted my Ustream.” That’s a good idea, yes. Okay, yes. So that should work.

So, they’re saying that your audio is very screech-y. And there’s some feedback that my video is not so clear now…, because it’s using the same bandwidth. Okay, they say it’s better now. Say something, let’s see. Om says, “I can also …” We’ll wait for their answer. Okay, video is fine for most of them, and now let’s find out about the audio. “It’s still too loud…” [they say]. So I’m presuming that my audio is still the same; so maybe a little more…, if you reduce, Om?

Om says, “Yes, just trying to…, is it better now?”  We’ll wait for them, while you reduce your mic volume. They say ‘Still a little loud’. Maybe a little more? Reduce it a little more? Om says, “I don’t know where exactly to…” Okay, we can play around with it a little later, maybe. Om says, “Yeah.”

Okay, so this is good. So maybe what we do from next time … Om, I’m going to hang upon you now. Love you, my dear.   Om says, “Love you, too, Father.”

Okay, so this is good. Maybe what we do now is we can publish my Google account, and then we can start a video call, and we can have some more interactions, like this, so it will be more like a real satsang, isn’t it?

Yes, yes. You say ‘Om’s is a little louder because the mic.., it goes straight into the computer, you see, and the mic is right there’.

This will be good. This technology thing, I tell you. [Laughs] Very good.

Amba says, “Will it be allowed to call you just to say ‘I love you’.”  Very much! The most welcome call. [Big smile].  This will be very good. This will be just like satsang. “So happy.”  Yes, yes. I love you, too.

And Shanti says, “There is excitement and apprehension here.”  It’s fine, it’s fine.

It doesn’t have to be the only way we communicate. We can do this as well. And if someone has a burning question, then they can dial in and speak like this also.

Louise says, “Is this possible from ipad, Father?”

Yes. The Google voice calling is possible from ipad as well. Thank you, my dear. Thank you so much.

We’ll also play with Skype a little bit, and see which one is better. Love you all so much. Thank you, my beloveds.

Om says, “Maybe beginning of satsang, we can log in to both places.”

Yes, if you feel like you’d like to share like this, in a more conversational format rather than just typing, we can log in to both places. Or maybe at the Hangout we can do both; maybe just do the Hangout.

Hmmm, I see. Jayani says, “Yes, Om. Then ask to call, and Father calls us.” Yes.

This is good. It feels like another important step we discovered today. See, this will seem like the hot-seat, isn’t it? Cannot hide behind typing then. This is good.

Shanti says, “It is seen that many things are new and scary with this unfamiliar technology; but when it is left up to Grace to work it out, it does so beautifully. I have no idea what to do, but it always gets done.”  Yes. Very beautiful. “So much trust in you and Grace.”  Very good.

I’m reading everything; I’m not going to read everything outloud. Let’s start with Zoe.

She said, “I’m glad I got to know you and love you while still typing. Would have been scared on the hot-seat otherwise. ” [Big smile]

If there is fear to do this, then we must, isn’t it? Then we must. We will transcend this also. Very good.

Lizelle says, “Much excitement.”  Very good.

Dorthe asks, “Will someone post instructions on Facebook?”  Yes, we will.

Shanti had said, “Turn up the fire, already.”  Good.

I like this. Isabella said, “Bring on the hot-seat.”  Very good.

“Our satsang is getting white-hot,” Om said.

Yes, Vivi. Very good.

And this will be very good for everyone to hear also. Very good. See, all this fear is coming out. This itself is Grace, you see?

[Unnamed] “Just with this idea, so much fear is coming out.”

This itself is Grace. It’s not even started, and so much fear, so much anxiousness…, all being released. And don’t say that you are feeling all of this; just say that ‘All of this is coming and going’. All of this is coming and going. Very good. Very good.

Prema said, “More direct meeting, Greta.”  Not sure what that meant. Yes, it’s a more direct meeting. What is Greta? Oh, ‘Great’. Great, I see. [Laughs]

Louise says, “Think I missed the beginning…, so we can call in now?” Yes. We just discussed this. We just discussed…, Om called in, or I called him, and we had this interaction. Yes. This is very good.

Let’s do one more. Who else is on Google? All too scared? [Laughs] Amba is on Google. And Amba, your ID I should have. Amba, if you have my ID, maybe you could try calling?

Louise says, “Now I need to get dressed for satsang.”  You’re getting dressed for your broadcast anyway, isn’t it?

It’s the new one. Let me see if I can post my email address.

Jyoti says, “Installed Skype, but what’s the ID to call?”

It’s not working on Skype yet. We’re using Google Video at the moment; but we will experiment with Skype as well, and see how that goes. So my ID is there. Or any of you are free to call. Just call.

[To unnamed person] You don’t see how to do it. Can you post your ID here?

Can I post this link? Copying… [computer ring tone ringing]. Ah, here.

Ananta: Namaste.

Amba: Namaste.

Ananta: Jai Amba! How wonderful. Very good. What do we do now?

Amba: Laughs [Delayed voice of Ananta speaks what he’d said. Distortion in sound].

Ananta: You have to mute something. This will take some getting used to for me as well.

[Distortion goes away].

Amba: I don’t have anything to say. But I love you very much.

Ananta: Oh, I love you, too. Great. This is great. Very wonderful.

Amba: [Laughing or crying] But I could just sit here all day and look at you.

Ananta: Same, same. [Laughs] This is very good.

So, let’s see what the others are saying on chat as well. Yes, she’s muted the Ustream now, so the audio should be fine. Yes.

Amba: Thank you.

Ananta: So much love, so much love.

Om says, “Is anyone else’s Ustream video quality getting affected?”

It’s bound to be actually, a little bit. Oh, you say ‘No video’…, Oh, many of you have lost video. I see…, Let me do this, and see if it helps. So, we will play around a little bit, but I can feel what it’s going to be like.

Amba: It’s very beautiful.

Ananta: Yes. I can feel your Presence also very strongly. Very good. Thank you so much. Thank you, my dear. I love you. Bye bye for now. Very good.

I’m very happy. Very happy. [Glowing smile] I’m happy that my Master’s light will spread very beautifully in this way. Very good.

Shanti says, “See you now, Father. Will be able to see the one in the hot-seat?”

We haven’t figured out that one yet. No, not yet; but maybe. Maybe soon.

Very good, Lizelle. Thank you, thank you.

Thank you all so much.

Thank you so much for joining in satsang today.

Moojiji ki Jai! [Namaste]

May his light continue to guide us in this beautiful, effortless way.

So much love to all of you. [Blows kiss and waves].

Sangha: Moojiji ki Jai! Anantaji ki Jai! Thank you. Love you.