BOOKS BY ANANTA Welcome to Satsang with Ananta

I don’t feel like there is a greater blessing in this play than when we really look at the question ‘Who am I?’ Because when we look at the question ‘Who am I?’ we realize that ‘All of this that I was believing myself to be, I have never been that. All of these concepts, even the idea that ‘I will find freedom one day’ …, there is nobody like that.’

All there is, is All There Is.

And You Are That All There Is.

But not even just that;

You are beyond All There Is.

[Silence]

But even when this question ‘Who am I?’ comes, it doesn’t mean that the mind will stop doubting. Because immediately it will come and say ‘Ahh! Did I get it yet? Have I found it who I am?’ Because it is the same as what she was saying the other day. ‘I? …, ‘i’. Who am I? Did i find it?’ (This small ‘i’.)

[Silence]

What a joke it is! The one that never exists gets so much allegiance and the One that is All There Is [doesn’t]. ‘Yeah, okay, but what does that mean for me?’ [Laughs] Many times we are like this in Satsang. ‘Yeah Father, to Awareness nothing is happening! I know that, but tell me about me.’

I Am …

Q: Sometimes, I see that the seeing also happens from two places. I’m not sure if this is my imagination or true. This is what I want to check with you. Sometimes, I’m away from the place of the witness, being the subject and phenomena being the object. But sometimes, it feels like the Awareness is itself being observed; I’m no more in the place. The Awareness itself becomes like an object that is observing the world (weird though that is).

A: What happens is that when this phenomenal state is here (that which we call the waking state) then there is a power which is available here which is like a distant cousin of Awareness, which is called attention. [Chuckling] It’s a cousin because it is quite similar. It does not have a color, it does not have a shape, does not have a size.

So, when attention moves; suppose it moves from here to here to here. [Turning his head left, center, right] The attention moves to something, then it seems like different objects come to life. And as our attention goes to something, it can feel like ‘I went there. I went to my thought, I went to imagination, I was daydreaming, I was with this person, I was in satsang’.

So, basically it is so intimate that we confuse it with ‘I’ very often. This is what we are talking about; this attention, which is the power of phenomenal perceiving…, that which brings phenomenal objects to life. And it is so intimate to the Self that it can seem like it is ‘I’. So, this is perceiving.

If we were to check ‘Okay, where is this attention reporting back to?’ then you will find that it is reporting to the Self. This is unchanging. Whether attention went on this [pointing to the left] whether attention went on this [pointing to the head] whether attention came here [pointing to his chest] or even to Presence: Whatever the content is of what this attention is bringing, where is it being delivered? Who is attention reporting to?

Then you will find that it is just the Self.  And this Self is always aware of the movement of attention.

Many times, we get caught up in the content of the attention and we feel we are there. So, that is one type of perceiving. We feel like ‘I am the content of what I’m perceiving’. And sometimes there is clear Seeing that ‘Whatever this attention might be bringing to me, it is only that I am just the Self’.

When we are identified with the content of our attention. it can feel like we are an object. Then we see that ‘I am empty of all limitation, empty of all boundary, empty of any physical attributes; I cannot make a picture of myself’.

So, this your experience of the non-phenomenal, non-experiential experience of the Self.

If you feel there is an object which you are finding, which is Awareness itself, then find out what is aware of that. Find out what is aware of that. And you will see that That which is aware of any object is itself not an object; and yet, it is You.

This is the beauty of Satsang, when you See that You are not an object; and yet You Are. This is the most ordinary and most extraordinary discovery that you will make. Ordinary because it has always been this; there is nothing special in this. And extraordinary because you wonder how you ever considered yourself to be an object.

That which is beyond all states, beyond all gunas, beyond all attributes, all qualities, beyond any label you can out onto yourself; this is what You are discovering YourSelf to be…, in this most straightforward direct manner, with no rush, with no feeling like ‘I have to get it now’ or something like that. All these can come and go.

As you are coming to Satsang, you are finding out that what is being pointed to is just so obvious in its Truth. Yet, for the mind, it is completely unfathomable.

It is this dropping if the mind which can seem a bit wobbly. Dropping all conclusions from the mind can seem a bit wobbly. We are going from old positions to a new position; and now all positions are being discarded…, empty of any reference point about YourSelf.

Because nobody will be there to own this discovery that You are Awareness. Nobody will be there.

The mind will come and say ‘Yes, yes, I saw it!’ No, no, no. That one whose voice this is, is not You.

You will find Shanti beyond any concept of shanti. Peace beyond any peace which can be worldly. Joy beyond any concept of joy, beyond any objective joy; beyond even the joy of Your holy Presence. The Joy of the Truth.

[Silence]

Position-less, notion-less Existence, where all rights and wrongs have been dropped; because none of them apply to You. All has been part of God’s play.

All of spirituality is like one flowchart. How to drop something is the aim of that flowchart. How to drop the notion of something? First, just forget it! [Chuckles] Don’t make it a ‘thing’. Forget it! Just remain as I Am, or just Be, surrender, let it be Father’s problem or Guruji’s problem (same thing). It can be let go of. Then, something is let go of in that.

Then you feel like ‘Oh, but this seems like some new-agey type stuff that is not real. How can I just let go? It’s just seeming like some new age philosophy; neo-Advaita or something like that.’

Then I say ‘Okay then, if you feel like you are something, can you check if it is true? Where is that something? Who am I?’ That is inquiry.

So, surrender and inquiry are the two main things that we speak about in Satsang; every Satsang.

Sometimes, rarely, someone will come and say ‘You know, surrender, Father, and inquiry also, I can’t really do.’

I say ‘Okay, how is it if I ask you to just stay with your breath. Stay with your breath; in-out, in-out. At least during that time, you’re not playing with the idea ‘I am something’. So, mindfulness comes from there. Same thing. You’re not picking up the idea that you are something…, by just keeping our attention on our breath.

Someone says ‘Okay, I can’t even do that.’ So, then, the Masters in their kindness said ‘Okay, let me give you a mantra. I will energize this mantra and give it to you because it has a resonance with your energy system as it is today. So, let me, on the basis of your energy system give you an energized mantra so that when it resonates, when the mantra reverberates within your Being, it seems to clean up all these notions that ‘I am something’. So, then we go ‘Ram, Ram, Ram, Ram’ and all this idea that ‘I am something’ is dissolving.

Then someone will come and say ‘I can’t bring attention to breath. I can’t even do chanting. I do it for two minutes but my mind is too distracted. I go to check my email.’ We say to them, ‘Okay, then maybe you can use a mala, so every time you get distracted, go to the physical sensation of the mala and keep your attention on that.’

Some will say ‘Even that doesn’t work.’ Then we say ‘Okay, so can you sing some bhajan at least. For 15 minutes every day, sing a bhajan. At least in those 15 minutes, you will not consider yourself to be ‘something’. You’re just invoking the Presence of the Lord in your heart.’

They might say ‘But I’m not devotional. Doing bhajans just sounds like some silly Indian music or something. I can’t do that.’

I say ‘Okay. Are you okay with bending your body a little bit…, to just keeping your attention on the body movements in a certain way? I’ll give you some yoga, hatha yoga, to do.’

So, all of this, starting from just this simple surrender, to actually the very physical exercise, the physical movement of the body, is all about dropping this notion that you are ‘something’.

There is no right or wrong in this; what is right, what is wrong. There is nothing like that. It is just based on what is suitable for your temperament.

But all are coming to this same point, that it’s so simple to Just Be.

All of this is ‘Much Ado About Nothing’…, [Chuckles] to discover That which You always Are.

Firstly, know that there is nothing to fix. Because otherwise, you will give birth to this checker guy, who will say ‘Okay, when I do this, when I use this concept, this will happen to me. When I lose this concept, then the ‘me’ itself disappears’. You see?

‘I’ can be inventive in this way also. The bench-marking report-card guy is constantly into this…, ‘Okay, then, how do I get to peace?’

But, Right Now, I am in peace.

Q: Effortless.

A: Effortless.

Q: Even that inquiry happens…, though all these situations don’t apply to me, there’s no inference.

A: Yes. So, then we go from inference to insight. That is the voice of Your Intuitive Presence…, where that which was just conceptual, now you’re Seeing that ‘I have no boundary; there is no limitation’.

This is the voice of Your intuition; it’s the Satguru or Divine Presence in Your Heart. And this intuitive Presence can be trusted.

If there is still some question about whether it is mind posing as intuition, then forget it about it. Intuition is not in a rush.

You will See that the qualitative difference between the mental thought and your intuitive voice will be so clear; that this intuitive voice does not want me to take a position, is accompanied by so much spaciousness, is in no rush. It is accompanied by the prasad [gift/offering] of peace and contentment.

When you find that there is Love there, then know that it cannot be the ego.

What is the struggle actually? If in Satsang there is a struggle, what is the struggle?

I am saying:

You are all there is.

You are God.

You are complete.

You are full.

You say ‘No, but…, I am something limited, and I want to be God’ or ‘I’m not getting to God’ or ‘I’m God, but in a personal way’.

And I’m saying ‘Why do you have to do all that? You are God.’

Q: Mind doesn’t believe that.

A: It doesn’t believe that. But the good thing is, that here, what I’m saying doesn’t have to be believed. What the mind is saying has to be believed. What I’m saying just can be checked:

Is there anything outside of You?

Unless you create first some mental boundary about where you are or what you are…, show me what is outside You? Then, what is God?

See, the Truth can be checked. The false is a presumption.

That a sensation which is the body (and many bodies we experience) but that a sensation which defines the body actually defines a boundary for Me is just an interpretation. It is not the Truth. It is experienced as a sensation. And in the experience itself, it is clear, that I contain the sensation, the sensation doesn’t contain Me. This is your direct experience. I can’t even translate it into precise words.

But the mind will come and say ‘See, this sensation is there; this is your limit, this is your boundary’. Without that, you’re a baby. They don’t have this concept.

Actually, sometimes we call Satsang ‘The process of going from the head to the Heart.’ But also, we can say that it is a process of going from the head, the mental interpretations, to our own recognition, our own insight. Because even what the mind is saying starts to feel like second-hand knowledge. So, don’t be frustrated. I get a lot of messages where someone will say ‘But I’m not recognizing myself as this Awareness. I don’t know who I am.’

Don’t be scared of this ‘I don’t know’ because when you get scared of this ‘I don’t know’ again you will rush to some other concepts. ‘Okay, I’m going to leave that old concept that ‘I am a person’ but I will pick up another concept ‘But I am This’…, so, this I will try to prove to myself and to everyone around me that this one is a valid concept now.’ And that doesn’t work. So, again, we look for the next change.

When suffering doesn’t stop because of any concept we might pick up, then we go through the whole journey again. But this insight, because you don’t find something phenomenal there, then it is very difficult to make a concept out of it and the mind can come and say ‘You still don’t know who you are.’ And we’ve been conditioned to believe that this ‘I don’t know’ is bad news. Actually, for me, this ‘I don’t know’ is the best news! Many write to me and say ‘When I do the Self-inquiry, I look and I don’t find anything. I don’t know who I am.’ This is very good. Better than if you were to say that ‘I am the Self. I found it!’ [Chuckles] Better sometimes. This ‘I don’t know’ is very good because we are letting go of this inferential knowledge or some interpretation of what is found; and we remain in the silence of our true insight.

Usually (we can’t make a generalization out of this but) usually it is found that those who will start the Self-inquiry and get a bit scared of this ‘I don’t know’ will pick up a concept ‘I am the Self, I am Awareness, I am nothing.’ Then you will find that they want to speak about it a lot. They want to share about it. Because they have their own self-doubt that wants to be camouflaged under this so-called aura of certainty. ‘I found it! I saw it! I’m IT!’ But, in the true recognition, is there some special thing about that? There is nothing special, nothing really to proclaim also.

So, in this way, this silence is very useful. We’re not replacing a set of concepts. Some of you are from different sanghas, different Masters, and you picked up a set of concepts there. So, we’re not going to replace those old concepts with new concepts. We’re not saying ‘Okay, we’re going from ‘X’ concept to now Guruji’s [Sri Mooji’s] concepts or Ananta’s concepts.’ The point is to come to this silence…, which is non-conceptual. Silence does not mean that we’re not speaking words. Words can still flow.

Silence is the absence of egoic belief.

If you’re truly hearing my words, what I’m pointing you to is way beyond the one that had a journey, way beyond all that you can think of yourself to be.

So, rest in this ‘not-knowing’. It is a very restful place. ‘I don’t know who I am.’ It’s beautiful. It is open.

If you switch from one conceptual knowing to another conceptual knowing, again it’s ‘the same guy’ (Guruji [Sri Mooji] says ‘it’s the same guy’) but in different disguises. So, we don’t have to worry about whether I have the right concept.

And if you feel like you’re not coming to the recognition in the inquiry, that is what I’m happy to do together. This is what we do every day.

A: Let’s really get into it now. That which you are finding yourself to be, can you apply any label to it? With full integrity, just check.

Q: But if I have to apply it …

A: … if you have to, yes.

Q: … then it is only ordinary. Otherwise even that is an argument, too. You can’t just say anything at all. When I open my mouth, the duality is gone.

A: So, suppose I was to say that it is completely extraordinary. Let me also try to be the lawyer for the extraordinary, for some time, and see if I can sell it to you.

It Is, but it cannot be seen.

It Is, but it has no attribute, no quality.

It Is, without all this light and sound, and yet It is the witness of all things.

It Is no-thing and yet all intelligence arises from It.

It Is no-thing and yet without It no things are ever perceived.

This extraordinary thing; extraordinary no-thing.

In that way, actually, because it is completely empty of quality, we can say on one hand it is completely ordinary like you said, but at the same time, we can say it is so extraordinary. That is why I was saying that actually…

Q: No cause and effect…

A: No cause and effect…

Q: … and no resolution of anything is even considered or promised or anything of that sort. It is just like ‘stand alone’.

A: Yes, because in expecting resolution, we are then posing again as the limited identity. The screen is not what we are complaining as, or the witness of the screen is not what we are complaining as (‘Why does this movie have to be so…?’) The screen is not complaining about the quality of the movie. And what happens in it? We first have to pick up the perspective of one of the characters in the movie and then we can say ‘I found that I am the screen, but why is my life not changing?’ That is the thing. So, in that, first you have to pick up the mask of the individual and then something like a resolution is there.

Q: Because that one always moves towards a better scene, the better next scene. It is programmed in that way, given any choice. Though it will not make any difference but the actual tendency is to move towards a better scene.

A: If you see this, then you will also see that a better scene is not necessarily always compliant with the mind’s idea of better. [Chuckles] But you will find that one day when just innocent objectivity is there, you will find that no matter what was given to me or taken away (even phenomenally, as the character in the movie) you will have this report one day and you will say (and it could be today, actually) you will say that ‘No matter what was given to me, no matter what was taken away, no matter what mistakes I made and what mistakes others made in my life, in this life I have had the blessing of coming to Bhagwan’s [Master’s] feet and nothing is worth more than that. So, what can I hold in my heart except gratitude for this grace?’

So, even the play of the character in the movie comes to this beautiful thankfulness. And then…, you know at the end of the play what happens? Everybody, even the villain of the play, all the protagonists, all the ones who were at logger-heads, then they join hands and they take a bow together. [Laughs] Then you have gratitude for all the co-actors, the seeming co-actors, in this play. You realize that at the end you come to this One and you see that you are grateful for Your own aspects for seemingly-doing all this to you and putting you in all this suffering and misery. And I can say this with full confidence about your [the questioner’s] play because even before you came to this Satsang you have been at Bhagwan’s feet. So, what is there?

It can seem like it’s a new way of looking, but actually, what has happened is that in our prior way, when the looking was happening, when the perceiving was happening, it was constantly accompanied by this concept ‘What’s in it for me?’ So, when you’re like ‘Should I pay attention to this conversation? Oh, is there something in this for you, are you learning something, are you getting something?’ ‘What are you watching?’ Is it based on that? ‘Where are you going?’ ‘What am I getting?’ So, it is constantly in the maha mantra of the ego which is ‘What’s in it for me?’

Now, that is being dropped away. To drop it away, for some time you might be using the opposite concept to neutralize the first concept, which is that ‘There is no me here’ or ‘I am not this’.

Q: It is not a concept.

A: But ultimately, you will see that even that is a concept. And you don’t need that concept ‘There is no me’ to live your life in a new way, to See things in a new way.

When you’re empty of any notion, what is here? [Silence]

Q: Nothing.

A: And yet, you’re hearing these words. You see? There is no individual person on which these words are landing. In your naturalness, this is your Truth. If it feels helpful for a while, we can. That’s why, even in Satsang, we can tell you the opposite. So, one day I will say that ‘You are not the doer at all’. Then one day I will tell you ‘Just do the inquiry. You can do it’. Why? Because I want you to drop both concepts, of doership and non-doership.

The point is to come to this neutrality.

It is just our expectation of what we will recognize. We feel that we will come to the Self, as if the Self is also some object. Whatever object is being cognized, who is aware of that? What is aware of that?

What is the One that witnesses all things, the One that is aware of all the states; the waking state, the dream state, the dreamless-sleep state? Is that an object in these states? How are you so sure about this?

How are you so sure that you are this body? How are you so sure that you are the owner of just this body?

How do you know that you are not the light of this entire universe? Just because this mind tells you? Is it not worthwhile to question this mind a little bit?

Listening to the mind, what have you got? Fear about death? Fear of the next moment? Fear of the future? The idea that you have a start and an end? The idea that you were born, you will die? All these have been the gifts from the mind…, the idea that you did something wrong, the idea that you can do something right.

How long do you want to play with these concepts?

And you are free to [Smiles] for as long as you like. But notice a discrepancy, if what you are claiming is ‘I’m done with these concepts’. If you feel that you’re done with these concepts, then notice that actually they have no power over you.

Are you really done with the play of this name and form?

Somebody said the other day something very nice. Jesh Krishna, it was. He said ‘Father, when we say ‘person’ it seems to generalize it a bit. But when I ask myself ‘Am I done with the play of Jesh, am I done with the play of Krishna?’ then it becomes really clear; the question becomes really clear.’ Because just like the ego, it becomes like a very generalized concept. And most people in the world actually believe they are not egoistic. If we talk to people generally on the road, and we asked ‘Do you feel like you are egoistic?’ [They would say something like]: ‘No, no, I’m not egoistic. My partner; you should meet them. They are really proud.’ Ego has been confused to be this sense of arrogance or pride. Then if we asked them ‘But do you consider yourself a person?’ [They would say] ‘Of course. I’m a good person.’ [Chuckles] Like that.

So then, like that, ego seems to generalize the concept. Then even this person idea, because we use it every day in Satsang, then we can say ‘Okay, that is just the person. The person comes. I’m done with the person.’ Sometime it’s good to put that name in the box, which you identify with the most, and say: ‘Are you done with that one?’

If there was a book, a story of this one, a novel was being written, and then the novel has this very tame ending: One who came to Satsang today, and nothing happened. But you gave up on writing the novel. Are you okay with that ending? Just mid-sentence it stops. ‘I came to Satsang. It started off very nice; bhajan was there, Aarti was there’ and then done! …, pen is dropped. Are you still wondering what is going to happen to this one that you consider yourself to be? ‘Where is the halo? Where are the followers? What Satsang will emerge from your mouth?’

This brings our belief system into very close focus. If this moment is the end of all stories that you about that name, would you be okay with that?

Not to be seen as anything special.

Not to also be seen as anything terrible.

Neither got it, nor didn’t get it.

But I’m pointing you to your notion-less existence.

Are you still waiting for the notion about yourself?

Are you still waiting for that ‘Yes, I got it!’

Or ‘Why don’t I get it?’

It is neither, you see? It is still the case of the mistaken identity, the ‘I’.

There is no individual anywhere. It is not even your experience. It is only one voice, which is just another sensation in your Being, which is programmed to convince you of your limited self.

Everything else Is as it Is. Even this, ultimately, Is as it Is, because this is the way in which Consciousness is playing with Itself.

If there are no more pages in your story, are you good?

A:  That is a definite. You can wobble for a long, long, long, long time.

Q: What is that ‘long’?

A:  Many lifetimes; you can wobble for many lifetimes. Time is nothing for Consciousness. It chooses to play as the wobbly one, but usually if there is an admittance of the wobbliness, it is shorter.

Q: By an act of will can you just stop, once one says ‘I will not wobble anymore’?

A:  That is when it increases. [Laughter] Usually it is found that when this notion comes that ‘I can get myself out of this wobbliness’ then that is how you prolong it. When it is ‘Oh, wobbliness, what is it to me?’ Or if the attitude is that of surrender, it’s like ‘Oh, Bhagwan has created this wobbliness. He must be wobbling and He will sort it out’…, then it can’t last for long. But if the ‘I’ comes in, the ‘I can solve it’ then that is a way of prolonging it. The mind itself takes it on and says ‘Oh, wobbliness, I will fix it.’

So, either in the surrender or the inquiry you find that ‘I am not wobbling; it is just a wobbliness which is happening, therefore I don’t have to do anything about it.’ Then we can say that it cannot really prolong. Because like with anything else phenomenal, it is based on whether we are believing a mental interpretation of it, which can then take a position and say ‘I will do it’ and very soon [gesturing coming forward in doing and then beaten back]. There are moments of full-on [gesturing confidence in doing] and then like [gesturing shrinking back] ‘No, I can’t do it, help me…’. In fact, that is the outward manifestation of this inner wobbliness. Until once you see that, whether the color of the cloud is grey or white, I am the sky, unaffected by it.

Q: [Inaudible]

A:  Ultimately it is that. Ultimately it boils down to the will of Consciousness. If it wants to play as the wobbly one, it will play as the wobbly one. So, there is no distinction between when we say ‘Grace of the Master’ and ‘The play of Consciousness’ actually, because that is basically the Guru’s will or God’s will which is going to play out. So, if it wants to play as a limited entity fighting this wobbliness personally, it can play as that. But the funny thing is that in the play, upon hearing this, usually some space can come; that is also part of the design of the play. The Guru’s grace, or the seeming undeserved blessings that we get in the Presence of the Master is also part of the overall design of Grace itself. Nothing is outside of that and yet it is a beautiful part of the design.

Q: It rarely slips in that this is just Consciousness, this is just a play. It may seem very serious and feels like you don’t have any will; still it is a play. That is Itself, space.

A:  Exactly. Then the play gets a different quality, a different beauty; [but] it is a play never-the-less. But the play is unaccompanied by the idea that this is a personal play, and it is in this Seeing that ‘Actually this is just a play of Consciousness, Being, that is playing with light and sound; Being is playing with all the gunas and qualities; Being is playing with all of these states of waking and dreaming and sleep’ then you experience the world unaccompanied by this constant ‘What’s in it for me? What’s in it for me?’ notion.

You will see that ‘I was playing it as if I was a person and that is also part of God’s play. Now I am playing it without the personal luggage, without this heavy school bag’. And it has a different lightness to it. As long as Consciousness wills for that play to continue, it will continue. When it wants to go to sleep, it will go to sleep.

Don’t make any conclusions. Because we’re emptying out all places, all concepts, where you can make a conclusion about yourself and rest on that, that ‘I am this way now. I am dropping more or I am picking up less’. You can’t make any of these conclusions. No interpretation about yourself is valid.

Because actually, we don’t know any of this. We don’t really know whether there was a past at all. You don’t actually know whether you came here or not by a car at all. Just like in a dream. We land in a dream; it could be the first dream moment you’re experiencing. But does it feel like you start every dream with amnesia? You just recognize the people around you. If someone were to ask you ‘How did you get here?’ …, if this was the first moment of your dream and I said ‘How did you get here?’ you would say ‘Yes, Father, I came on the bike’. It’s completely possible for us to have this interaction in that (which is the same as this) which we call the dream state.

So, we don’t know anything about the past. And this one we’ll regularly admit to…, we don’t know what the future is going to be like. So, better not to have any conclusion, even about what happened. Was that you who came on the bike?

Q: I have no idea.

A: This is the thing. We don’t even have to do all this exercise when you See that you are empty of all conclusions just now. [Silence]

And I’m here to hold your hand through this period of wobbly-ness, like ‘Without a concept, how will I survive? What will happen to my life?’ The fear of death, the fear of the unknown; in many ways, it comes like this. And our motivation to jump through these concepts…, ‘Oh, I did understand something! I want to hug that and stay with that; whatever knowledge I’ve picked up’ is also a reaction to that fear itself.

Very few will tell you in this world that ‘I’m not teaching you anything, actually’. All the words that are being used here are just so that you can empty your conceptual baggage. We’re not to make a new religion out of this.

Empty yourself of all conceptual baggage. If it is shaky and if you feel like you need to hold someone’s hand, come, hold my hand. If you want to hold my hand physically, hold my hand physically. If you want to hold my hand in your heart, it is there. But I’m here to tell you that if you go through this wobbly-ness for a little bit, that as you start to get used to it, nothing can shake you then.

When you are trying to push something away, then it can seem like it is very strong. Our resistance is what seems to give it power. In your openness, I’m telling you that nothing is really that strong as we consider it to be.

Everything is perceived as a set of sensations. Now, what is too strong for the Perceiver of them? How loud or how big does something have to be when it becomes too loud or too big for the Perceiver?

If an image came (the image is a tiny image of an ant) but what if this image keeps growing? Now, this ant is as big as this body. But it keeps growing, growing. It’s as big as this room. Big, big, big; bigger and bigger. It’s as big as this building. Bigger, bigger, bigger. It’s a big as the entire Earth. Because this ant, which is so tiny, the image, the visual of it is so big now …, is it bigger than the Perceiver? Does it hurt the Perceiver?

It’s just another image, isn’t it?

Can any object perceived become greater than That which perceives it?

Any thought (even if it feels like it is shouting and screaming, throwing a big tantrum) is it bigger than Your Being in which it is appearing?

It is only if you introduce yourself in this image now, and you introduce yourself as a person, a body, that then the ant is so big. Then it can become scary.

But if you are not a thing, if you are not an object, what is too much for You?

So, if the thought comes and says ‘You’re a green Martian’ no matter how many times it comes, and how large-seeming it is, you will not find it so strong. But when the thought comes ‘I am a person, I am an individual entity’ …, it because we have nurtured it with our belief [that it seems so strong]. It is because we have given it the possibility of being true for so long, that when it comes…, [it seems so strong].

Like the thought would say ‘You have to be a good person’ or something like that. Because we have nurtured the possibility of being a person for so long that this thought can seem like it is loud.

Can you take an example of a loud thought? You will find that (although there are these 3 or 4 things that are loud for most of us) for everyone in this Satsang today, it will not be equally loud. Why? If the thought itself was loud, then it should be equally loud for everyone. It is because of what has been conditioned here, what has been believed here in the past [that some thoughts are more loud than others].

Then, like, I used to take this example: If I say to you that ‘You are a terrible ice skater; there is no chance you will come into the Olympics this time’ you would say ‘Is that supposed to hurt me? It is not affecting me at all’. But if I say to somebody ‘You’re a terrible person’ or ‘You’re not a good partner’ or ‘You’re not a good mother’ or ‘You’re not a good father’ …, [that would probably hurt.] Why? If I say to someone who is an Olympian ice skater ‘You’re terrible, there’s no chance’ that one will hurt them more.

So, it’s not the content of the thought itself but what the relationship with that thought has been that makes it loud or more intense.

If, in your most natural place (and I just said ‘Then what are You now?’) all those questions, all those conditions, they vanish. How do I know that they will vanish? Because they are not true; they are not your original state.

So, you don’t have to take one position over another. You don’t have to take one as the Truth, one as the false. Just…, everything is gone. This is Your notion-less Existence.

But the minute you pick up the idea ‘Okay, but then, Father, what should I do?’ [Chuckles] …, that is the position that you will pick up. But, for that, either we let it go; just Be. Or, we say ‘Who is here to do something?’ Actually, both are the same. Both these apparent approaches are the same. They have the same effect of dropping the ‘something’.

So then, just Being is no longer any different from the inquiry itself. Because as You’re just Being, it is clear who You Are (which is the inquiry). The recognition is so apparent. And as Your recognition is apparent, what are You? You are just Being.

Soon, all these distinctions will fade away, because You will realize that ‘I don’t need a strategy to get anywhere, I don’t need a plan to get anywhere because before I even decide to get somewhere, I Am That’.

This is just Being…, [Chuckles] without doing the ‘just Being’.

I hope, more and more, this point becomes clear for all of you. Because otherwise, what I say is that ‘If I have a goal or a destination, a plan to get there, a path ‘What can I do?’…, then the starting point itself becomes false, which is to pick up the mask of the limited one.

What I’m showing you is that in Your concept-less Existence, Right Now:

Is there somewhere to get to?

Is there something you have to become?

Is there some more right or wrong way?

Can anything come and change Your Reality?

Yes, Yes! This is a very good point. So, these days I have been saying this and you have been watching some of the satsang also. I have seen that the words that have come from here should help to clarify this very clearly.

As we don’t have any notion about ourselves; whether we call it just Being, just empty, just open, in complete acceptance (whatever the terminology we use is unimportant) …, basically the point is to come to this notion-less existence. Guruji [Sri Mooji] calls this your unadulterated Being, your unassociated Consciousness.

Now, that which gets associated is just a notion, that ‘I am something’. If upon hearing the pointing to ‘Just Be’ you can see that all somethings are coming and going, then nothing is getting attached. Then simply you come to your simple surrender. This is only surrender, that ‘I have nothing to do with the something that the mind is offering to me. It is all allowed to come and go.’ This is the simplicity of surrender.

For you, because of your temperament, it might seem like this is the easier position.

Now, as you come to this unadulterated Being, uncontaminated Consciousness [Laughs] (whatever terminology you use) the truth about who You Are is very apparent! So, it is not that the insight which is available in inquiry is not apparent already in your just Being. So, that Self- recognition is the most apparent thing in your Being.

Now, others might feel that ‘This just me thing, I just can’t do that this me thing’ so they have a different temperament. They might be able to surrender all the ‘somethings’ to allow them to come and go. If they feel like ‘This being, I can’t just be; that sounds like a doing to me’ [Laughs] …, some can also say that. So, for them, because they are so different temperamentally, and they are very quick to pick up on the idea of ‘I am something’ and they feel like ‘I can’t just let it go, I can’t surrender it, I can’t just be’ then there is another way. Whichever ‘something’ you are considering yourself to be, inquire whether that is true or not. ‘I am not a good person, I am not finding the truth, I am not a worthy seeker’ …, all these ideas we have. So, for those who are not able to just let them go, able to ‘Just be’ then we say ‘Okay, you inquire into whether these are true. And as we inquire into whether these are true, we find that these notions become powerless and we Are just Being. And again, as we are just being, the truth is completely apparent.

What we have to be careful about in the ‘Just being’ is that we don’t think that there is ‘somebody’ just being. Because even that can become a position. Empty of the notion of even ‘Just being’ …, You Are. You just Are. You are not ‘doing’ the ‘Just being’. It’s not like ‘Okay, I am going to leave the inquiry; now I am just going to be. Because no matter what you do with that mask of ‘I’ …, it will be comfortable for few days but after few days even that will start poking. So, You just Are. You don’t have to do anything to just be. Being just IS.

So, what you are saying is that as ‘I am just being. As being just IS, I don’t need to pick up any notion, including the notion of inquiry.’ Yes! If the first part of what you are saying is true then the second part is also true. If no notion is that attractive for you that it seems sticky, then there’s no need for any practice, including inquiry.

Whatever you might be defining about yourself, whatever limit you might be believing you have, is not true. No matter how big you consider yourself to be, the Truth is bigger than that. No matter how much of a nothing you consider yourself to be, the truth is less nothing than that nothing. Because You are beyond all these attributes. That which we have considered ourselves to be has been false.

That’s why I say that the Master takes everything from you. Which means what? He is not interested in your phenomenal things, he is not interested in any worldly things that you could give, but every idea that you have believed about yourself ultimately is offered up at the altar of the Satguru. Even the offerer is offered up.

I was chatting with someone and my wife about not making even the openness into a position. Even that is not something I am doing. Empty of all notions about yourself. You don’t even have to empty them out. Just naturally, in this moment, You are.

We have been doing this over and over again in the last week or so, where we saw that in this moment, what is Here? What is Here? What is your fundamental recognition about what is Here? [Silence] What is the basis for everything else?

So, you could say the Self is Here or God is Here or Satguru is Here. What is more valuable than that? Nothing is more valuable than that.

And yet, the power of our belief only operates in that way. We leave the arms of the Satguru and we feel like something is more important than that. Some limitation that you believe about yourself cannot be more important than Your God Presence.

The idea that’ I must do something’ is the idea that God cannot do it or God does not know what God is doing. The idea that ‘I must want it a certain way’ is the idea that God doesn’t know what I need to experience, isn’t it? Because if I leave it to this higher force which is running this world then I don’t know what I am going to get and that force might mess it up. [Chuckles]

So, as I was saying, the idea that ‘My experience must be different from what it is’ comes from where?

What is desire? Desire is this very same idea, isn’t it, that ‘The content of my present experience is not enough. It must include something else so that I get a feeling of being more complete, being more whatever, being more happy’. And yet, when you really look, in the effortlessness of the Right Now, are you are happy or unhappy?

This is the human condition. We have picked up conditions about our happiness and then realized that ‘Actually, to be happy, I just need to drop these conditions. I will not find that happiness that I am looking for by picking up a new condition about how anything should be’. It’s just the mind trick. Because what is Here is beyond anything that you can imagine. And You Are That.

Now, if you pick up the idea ‘But I want to get it’ then that is also from that idea of desire. That’s why I have said that all confusion, all suffering, is basically this mistaken identity. If you see this much, it is enough for today’s satsang actually, that all confusion, all suffering, all grievances, are really only about this false mistaken identity that I believe myself to be. And that one is never here. So, we exchange what is Here naturally with an idea of who I am. ‘What should I do? What should I have?’ …, can only come from a mistaken idea of who I am. Once you find the clarity about this…

Where will you find it? You will not find it in the future and you will not find it on the basis of any past experience. Where will you find YourSelf ? Here and Now. That Here and Now which is not in time.

Q: This year my Father died, my husband died, my good Sangha friend died. In this moment, I feel disconnected from the Self. Please help.

A: So, this year these strong events have happened. As far as the phenomenal world is concerned maybe the strongest things that we can call in this realm have happened. And yet, this last part of what you say ‘In this moment, I feel disconnected from the Self’.

So, are there two of you? One is the ‘I’ and the other is the ‘Self’?

Can we locate this ‘I’ that is disconnected from the Self?

Now, a feeling can be there and the feeling can be strong. An interpretation can be there and the interpretation can seem true. But for a moment, if you are not to be concerned about what the feeling is, or what the quality of the feeling is, or what the thought is saying, what is it that you are?

The Self is never disconnected from the Self. The ‘I’ that could be connected or disconnected is never true. This is really important.

The Self can never be disconnected from the Self; it is the Self. And the ‘I’ that could be connected or disconnected is never real. That has just been an idea.

That which You Are, Right Now, is beyond all connections and disconnections. It is only when you consider yourself to be something limited, if you consider yourself to be something who is specific to this name, something limited to this body, then you will feel like ‘I am a limited entity, and I need to connect it back to the Source’.

But now, you’re realizing that the true ‘connecting back’ is actually a recognition that ‘I can never be disconnected’.

Are you aware of the body, or is the body aware of you?

In your experience…

Are you aware of your thoughts, or are these thoughts the greater?

Are they the unchanging witness and this Awareness is coming and going?

What is your truest position; the one that does not come and go?

Without the idea that you’re a limited entity, without the idea that you are ‘some-thing’ …,

what real disconnection is there?

That is the simplicity of Advaita Vedanta. We don’t consider you (and it is not just a logical position, it is an experiential Truth) that I don’t consider you to be a separate entity at all…, so that you don’t consider yourself to be a separate entity. Because once this idea of separation is given belief then it seems like to come to the realization of the Self is a long journey.

If this separation has never really happened, why must we pick it up?

And if we have picked it up, we can see now that it is gone.

But if we start from the perspective that ‘I am some-thing’ …, that there is an individual jivatma, then it seems like a long, difficult process to bring this ‘I am some-thing’ back home.

What is your Truth right now?

Is it true that you are some-thing?

Is it true that ‘I am some-thing?’

What is that some-thing that you attach to ‘I am’?

What is the basis of that?

It’s just another thought.

It is just a notion, a concept.

It has no validity, no Reality.

Actually, the ‘job’ of the Master, if there is such a thing as a job, is the simplest and also the most difficult. [Laughs]

Now, suppose one day you went to the top of the India Gate, or went to the top of the Eiffel Tower, or went to the top of the Statue of Liberty or something; you went to the top. And then you forgot that you are at the top of this and the feeling is that ‘I want to get there’. So, everyone who comes now, you are asking them ‘Sir, how do I get to the top of the Eiffel Tower?’ And you are expecting that the color of the clouds will change; because you are just looking at the clouds, you are not looking at where you are, you are just looking at the clouds, the sky. ‘Something should change.’ So, everyone is coming and telling you ‘But you are there’.

Where are you? What are you?

But you’re like ‘But these clouds, they bother me. They’re too dark’ or ‘They’re too light’.  They’re too whatever. ‘I was told that my experience would change if I was on top of the Eiffel Tower. Something should be different.’

So, what is the Master saying? Just really check: Where are you? The only thing (seemingly) that gets in the way are these moving clouds; these moving clouds which come as ideas about ourselves. Then what to do with these moving clouds? You hear every day. Either let them become the Master’s problem, or you inquire whether any of these clouds are truly about you. If you let them go, then the Truth is very apparent. It’s just that our attention has gotten so caught up in this mind that it feels like ‘I don’t have any attention to spare to look within’. Then you come to this space in which there is no within or without. It is not even space.

So, let go of these clouds, or inquire into them and find out if any cloud really touches You, makes a dent, makes a scratch on You, in Reality. Then you’ll not have to run for the Truth. You Are the Truth. You don’t have to do any ‘Truth exercise’ …, no spiritual push-ups. But if you approach this from the perspective of the mask already, from the personal mask already, then it can seem like there are many things you have to do to drop the mask. The ego trying to kill the ego. The thief trying to catch the thief.  It doesn’t work like that.

What is Your mask-less Truth?

What is Your naked Reality?

Are you confused here? Are you lost?

Do you have somewhere to get to?

Are you trying to understand Awareness?

Do you have to fight with some emotion?

Do you have to fix a relationship?

Do you need to earn more money?

What is here, before there is an idea of you, which I call the mask?

Are you the doer, or the non-doer?

Q: Fear of the unknown is so strong that the right side of my body is tightening, extreme with tension. Guruji, what do I do now?

A: Don’t fight with this fear. Just See naturally (and if the answer doesn’t come, it’s fine; but naturally, if some answer arises for this): How much space is this fear truly taking, within you?

[Silence]

It can seem like our entire attention is getting used up in this sensation of fear. But allow the question to make some room; effortlessly. How much space is this fear taking inside me?

And if it is taking all the space, then where am I hearing these words? In which space are these words being heard? Then you find that this space of Your Existence can contain not just this fear but the entire universe.

When we See it like this, then we stop fearing the fear. There is nothing to fear about fear.

Let fear come.

There is a huge vastness within You which is completely untouched by this fear. It is just the nature of these things that they pull in all our attention, so it can seem like it is too much.

The example is just like (I like to say) there is a big white wall behind me and I put a small black dot there. And I ask: ‘What do you see?’ Most of you would say ‘Oh, there’s a black dot. It’s a black dot.’ [Chuckling] Very rarely would someone say ‘Oh, there’s a big wall’. Because we are so used to this space that we’ve forgotten it’s vastness, it’s boundary-less-ness, which can contain the entire universe, and many times this universe, with no trouble.

[Silence]

Just like the screen remains untouched no matter which visual is being projected on it, Your Being, Your Consciousness, remains untouched no matter what the sensation might be. So, we don’t have to resist any sensation, we don’t have to fear any appearance. Allow it to come. In fact, if you want, you can keep a slightly welcoming attitude. Say ‘Okay, you want to live here for some time? Let’s see how long you will last.’  You will see that, compared to the Reality of You, all these sensations are just coming and going.

So, what happens is that because we have considered ourselves to be limited for so long, as we are coming to this Seeing that ‘I Am this shoreless Being’ there are two usual responses in the play.

The first is the response of fear (‘Oh, what is going to happen?’) …, whether we call this the fear of death or the fear of the unknown. And if you don’t have a Master, then many times when we first get a little taste of this fear then something feels to back off. Because (usually) the Master is not there saying ‘It’s okay, nothing will happen to you’. This is the first.

The second is that as we find the vastness of This, we can then get caught up in the feeling around it, the taste of it. We can feel like ‘Wow’ …, the excitement of it. But whether it is the fear of it or the excitement of this discovery, the discovery is not the fear or the excitement. So, let that fear play out how as it has to. Let this excitement also play out how it has to. But You are Seeing that neither of these You are. The ocean remains unmoved no matter what the quality of the waves might be. So, outwardly there can be this ‘Oh, what’s going to happen?!!’ [fear] or ‘Ahh…, what’s happening?’ [Excitement] Either can happen. But in Reality, You have always only been This.

So, nothing is going to happen and nothing really is happening. It’s just that the false idea has been thrown away. These by-products, they can come and they can go, but it is never about any of the by-products itself. If they are sweet, we can enjoy them; enjoy them as prasad. Prasad means the offering [gift] that you get after Darshan. If they are scary, know that your Master is taking care of everything.

In this way, all these movements of the waves can happen, but You See that whatever expression might be playing out here, whether it is fear or excitement, I remain; untouched, unmoved unchanging.

So, no desire, no aversion to anything that might play out as this discovery is happening. As long as we don’t get confused between the by-products of the discovery and the discovery itself, the play cannot perpetuate, the belief in the individual identity in the play cannot perpetuate. The play can go on. The appearance of the play can go on.