Confession, hollow words and a lost foothold
Original Marathi from the Tukaram Gatha · About Sant Tukaram
मराठी मूळ
वांयांविण वाढविला हा लौकिक । आणिला लटिक वाद दोघां ॥1॥
नाहीं ऐसा जाला देव माझ्या मतें । भुकेलें जेवितें काय जाणे ॥ध्रु.॥
शब्दज्ञानें गौरविली हे वैखरी । साच तें अंतरीं बिंबे चि ना ॥2॥
जालों परदेशी गेले दोन्ही ठाय । संसार ना पाय तुझे देवा ॥3॥
तुका ह्मणे मागें कळों येतें ऐसें । न घेतों हें पिसें लावूनियां ॥4॥
Tukaram Gatha (Marathi Wikisource)
English Translation
I built up this worldly reputation for nothing and brought a false quarrel upon us both. God has not become real to me in the way I expected. What does the hungry one truly know while eating? Through verbal cleverness I adorned my vaikhari, but the truth does not reflect itself within. I have become a stranger in both places: the world and Your feet, O God, are both lost to me. Says Tuka, had I known this beforehand, I would never have taken on this madness.
We ask forgiveness for any inaccuracies in rendering Tukaram ji’s original Marathi.
In Plain Words
For nothing I built up this worldly name, and brought a false quarrel between us both. By my reckoning, God has not become real to me. What does the hungry one know while he is eating? With clever words I dressed up my speech, but the truth does not reflect inside me at all. I have become a stranger in both places; the world is gone, and Your feet too, O God. Tuka says: had I known this beforehand, I would never have taken on this madness.
What it means
This is Tukaram turning on himself with hard honesty. He admits he built a reputation for piety that was worth nothing and in doing so set up a false quarrel between himself and God. He confesses that, by his own measure, God has not yet become real to him, and that his fine, clever speech was only ornament: the truth never actually settled inside. The result is a frightening in-between: he has let go of the world but has not reached the feet either, so he is a stranger in both places at once. The closing line is rueful, not self-pitying: if he had foreseen this state, he would never have set out on the path, and the verse names the cost rather than glamorizing the journey.
Confession and Sin
Raw, unflinching accounts of personal failure, weakness, and the weight of sin.
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