You Are Always Present as Presence Itself - 17th October 2017

These are very troublesome. Duality, firstly, is the basis of all the 'Ds.' There is a 'me' and there is another. The keys of desire, doubt, doership—how come all these 'Ds' which it produced? And you come across these things. I said it's watching inside. Which, if you hear this pointing: don't fill in the blank of 'I am ____.' 'I am [blank].' Because anything then, the mind will use all its power—because all it has is suggestions—to fill up that, to make this pure presence 'I am' into a notional idea, 'I am something.' Because that is effort, that is tiring. I know initially it can seem like to not attach, to not give that 'something,' can seem a bit of an effort and it could feel like that. But it is only because as we are returning to our naturalness, it has seemingly become unnatural. The habit is to attach.

So in the breaking of the habit, it's like we've been carrying this 'something' on our heads. Now everyone knows that it is the carrying of that 'something' which is effort. But it can feel like the keeping down which is work, because it seems like we are just 'I am this,' which is part of the 'something.' The 'something' is part of me. It can seem like that appendage or whatever heavy box you are carrying of 'something' is a part of me. It is not so. The inquiry does this: see that it is not. And the surrender does this: surrendering this box to God. Of course, I do not have to carry it anymore. Our spirituality is just this: whether you do 500 push-ups a day to get here or exist here, this is so clear. I am not that 'something' which I always presumed myself to be, and now I am relieved.

So this can become an example, isn't it? This way happens because 'I am not strong like Pushpa,' 'I am not so...' After 'I am,' don't put anything. You don't really have to. No matter how much you convince me that you have to, how much you convince yourself that you have to, you don't have to fill in the blank with anything at all. Anything that you put in the box is not the truth. It is an underestimation and underselling of what you are here. A limitation. I'm saying get a taste of the immortal presence, of the undying Being. You say, 'Can I have fries with that? Where's my burger?' But taste your immortal presence. Tell me if this is true or not. But I'll say it's immortal only if there are two more teaspoons of sugar. So whatever the mind is trying to present to you as your freedom, it's only a bad Xerox, a bad photocopy.

Don't exchange this presence, your holy God-presence, for any idea, any concept. Yes, to the end of all your plans about yourself. It is the end of your story. I know you were building up to create this wonderful novel where the ending was supposed to be the enlightened sage or something like that. What I am saying: forget about all that at this moment. Put the pen down. All your desire is done. Hand it over to existence, hand it over to God. All that you have to do is hand it over. All the separation, all the duality now belongs to God. Leave it with me for a bit. Throw your doubts for a day. You could be for the day. You can pick them up back tomorrow if you like them, if you miss them, if you feel like life is missing something. We can come to your doubt tomorrow. Today, this is true: that your presence in this moment is enough. If this is false, then everything I've ever spoken is untrue. It is completely pointless. All these pointings have no purpose if, in reality, that which you are now is lacking something.

You have to help me with this now. What does the mind come and say? 'But this is not enough. There must be something more.' Or, 'I am not there yet, there's still something more I have to do.' 'I haven't really got it.' It could also be saying, 'Easy for him to say, he doesn't have my life.' Nothing. Mind is not a taste. Or the taste of... I mean, your timeless presence in the limited notion. Oh, you mean that exchange? So is sorry, freedom certificate? What did it say? This is the state before anything we can certify about ourselves.

If you're looking at what the mind is saying, very good. Don't make anything out of anything in this that you are saying, that you've never disclosed. You've told us many times, if you don't remember what happens now. Offers come from a mind and they say, 'Okay, this is something really important.' Nothing in those. Surrendering of things. Don't exchange your holy presence, my Father's field, for anything at all. Now it is completely possible, just now. You are always present as Presence itself. Always present as Presence itself, and the person is always absent. You don't even have to become the person that gets rid of the person. The one who had the thief pretending to get rid of the thief or catch the thief. Not one step you have to take, not one inch you have to move.

The basket of individuality is empty right now. It is done. But if you put one peanut in it relentlessly, the picnic basket is full. Good news is that even if you did, there's nothing to worry about because it is empty now. Are you happy to have no notions about yourself? Let's see some hands. 'I'm happy to have no notions about...' There are some notions which we cannot do without. Some notions you can't? The notion that you can't do that? Then there's no change. You're sure it is there, but you can't? Then point it out. Sure it is there, this notion. Through that it must be there. 'I can't be free like that.' It can come from that. 'But I can't be sure yet.' 'I don't feel like something like that.' These notions—see if you can throw them away. It can become very attractive after, because they can take on a position of the seeker. And the seeker has not arrived. And then the opposite notion, which is 'I have arrived.' It is clear to those: no notions, no position. Nothing. Empty of either.

This chance and light on it for centuries, shining as a community. But now, like right now, and so it's a Satsang every day so that whatever notions might even have got picked up, you come and have this box every day. Whatever doubts, whatever attachments raise their hands—it's good, it's good. Laughs can come. Oh, how many are happy? Like I said, I don't know all these silly jokes that come into this one. So the same ones: that you can either have a Guru or you can be Frank Sinatra. Why? Because 'I did it my way.' If you have your way, even if you feel like you know what has to happen, then you have one notion about yourself. Even a spiritual idea is nothing but a resistance to what is.

Are you happy to talk away your prediction and partake in a meal that the Satguru has prepared for you? In the game of wanting to be a person finding enlightenment, it's like waiting for your green beans to stop. The full seven-course meal is laid out for you, and all you have to give up is your favorite notion about yourself. This is not as dramatic as the story about cutting your head off because a Guru is just monstrous. But when you just think, 'I don't have a strong...' so this head is what? It is just your favorite notion about 'I am something.' I want that 'something.' That is my Guru Dakshina. Whatever you put in that box of 'something,' I want you. Who says the video is without desire?

As I say, don't you get that I don't charge money? I have no expectation. I want your head, which is nothing but your favorite idea about yourself. Surrender all these ideas that you might be unwilling to drop. Make a prayer in your heart to the Satguru, the Father: 'If this is untrue, let me have the strength to give it to you, to hand it over, because it has no place in my life.' And if you feel like your temperament is not like this, it is not devotional, then inquire into this notion which you are unwilling to give away. Who are you?

And as much as possible, sometimes just be quiet. Notice, especially if there is a habit. There is a habit of getting into spiritual arguments or trying to convince people about something. This what you're discovering is too sacred to be used as tools for argumentation in order to be seen as something special. You question why this longing to be in Satsang? The notion of 'me' wants to dissolve actually. It is Consciousness playing with this. You are in Satsang because it is done with the notion. The notion of 'me' itself is programmed to perpetuate. It will even try to be in Satsang to try and perpetuate. But now you're deeply longing. Consciousness is done with the play of individuality and embarks on this new play of Satsang to rid yourself of individuality. I would say auspicious, very good. A little too strong name.

In the world, it is found that one desire leads to another. It is a mother desire. It's one of the reasons it's an endless attraction of desire after desire. But when this comes—longing—this desire for Satsang means something is done playing with the world as if it is an object. In the world, it's being something which is tired of objects, because there is no objective benefit here of anything. I'm not teaching you how to awaken the giant within you. I'm not teaching you a thousand ways to make a million dollars or something. This is here, but something that is here versus any of these other things. That must now be done with this play of objects. Especially for those who've been here a few times. The first few times you might still wonder, 'Maybe he's just saying it like that, but actually I might get some special ability or some special mantra.' But by now, most of you are completely clear that nothing like that is on offer here. Who wants this? Find that one. A thing which is an object is pointed to here, and yet something is longing for that. Is it you? Oh, good for today. Thank you all so much for being here.