The Truth We Are Looking For is the Reality of the True 'I' - 8th June 2016

Yes, God. So this truth that we are looking for—the truth that we are looking for is the reality of the 'I.' See, it is not an object to be found outside because we have found many objects and all objects only give us momentary pleasure, momentary happiness, momentary joy. So it cannot be the search for an object. The truth must be something which I am. But the mind will resist this question. It will say, 'But what about my peace? What about my frustration?' This is not helping till we don't come to clarity about who you are. So that is why Satsang is different from most other interaction, most of the spaces in this world. Because for most other spaces in this world, there is something to be offered to this 'I.' You go to school, then the idea of you—you learn something in school. You go to relationships so that you—the idea that you have about yourself—feels a sense of companionship, experiences some pleasure. All of these things. You make some money so that the idea you have about yourself is a sense of security. It is only in Satsang like this where we are not offering anything to this idea of you. I can't even offer you the end of your frustration. I can only offer you this mirror. Who wants the end of frustration? If you can look for this one, then I can tell you that those who have found the truth about who they are have rarely ever said 'I'm frustrated'—only as a joke maybe sometimes. I have not seen anyone come to the end of their frustration without discovering what they are.

Who is witnessing the mind's response to what I am saying? Is that also the mind?

Are you that one which is speaking the words of the mind, or are you that one which is witnessing the words of the mind? Now, what's happening now?

Witnessing.

Okay. So if you are witnessing, is the witnessing frustrated? Is the witnessing breaking down? Is the witnessing frustrated? Is the witnessing worried about what is happening to your life?

It's the image which is getting frustrated. Yes, yes.

So this image is dancing in front of you. Sometimes happy, sometimes frustrated, sometimes worried, sometimes all kinds of things. But you are not the image because you are that which sees this image. Once you recognize the stability of this witnessing, the unchangingness of this awareness, then there is not so much concern about how the image is dancing around.

Father, it's difficult.

Who's saying this? It's not... it's the ego. Yes, the ego is what? The ego is this belief in this separation that 'I exist as a Prachi.' But are you the ego? So the ego has a name called Prachi. It pretends to have a form like this body. But are you the ego? Who is aware even of the ego? The mind will come with all kinds of resistance: 'It's too difficult, I'm not getting it, what's the point of all of this, how will this help me, will I become enlightened if I do this?' All kinds of things it will say. But you can allow them to come and go. The moment you say 'it is the ego,' that means you're already saying that 'I am not the ego. I am aware that something is the ego.' So keep the ego also aside. What is left? Are you just the ego? There's something else also. If you had no idea about yourself and you had no name, if you did not believe that this is your form, the body, would you be? Would you still exist or not? Without a name, without any sense that 'this is my body,' is there anything more to you than this? Every cell of this body is changing every few years, so where are you in the body? Every cell is being replaced. Right now, if I take away some cells, will you go along with those cells or will you still remain? At which point will you go? What is it that you are? If I had some future technology which could replace everything that is in the body one by one, limb by limb—we exchange this body for a new one—and what remained here, although the body is brand new now, what is it that remains? Will you go along with the whole body—everything, brain, heart, everything being changed one by one? We are replacing everything. Okay, everything is changing to a new one. Did you go along with all that that was now thrown away and discarded? Are you still here in this new body?

Where in the body are you?

Don't know, actually. Yes, so 'don't know' is very good. But at least 'don't know' means that I don't know whether I am the body, I don't know whether I am... then don't refer to yourself as that. At least while we don't know, let's not refer to ourselves as that. And this period of 'don't know' can seem like a bit of a struggle for the mind because the mind wants to come to a conclusion that 'I am the body-mind.' She's saying, 'I cannot be these organs of the body, these limbs of the body, I cannot be these thoughts which are coming and going.' Who am I that is aware of the coming and going of thoughts? Thought comes, we say the mind is there. The thought goes, there is no thought, we say it is the no-mind. So who is aware of mind and no-mind? With no attention on my ear, then no ear exists. And attention goes to the ear, then ear exists. Am I in the... how is the ego understanding?

Who's the ego? Who is the one that is understanding?

Okay, let's see who is the one that is understanding. What is your definition of ego?

It's the image.

Yes. So this image, like a painting—can it understand something? A painting can understand something? So the mind is saying, 'I'm not getting it, what's happening?' So what I was saying is that don't draw any conclusions yet. Remain in the not-knowing and speak from what you see directly. From what you see, not from what the mind is saying. It is this direct seeing of what you are, it is the direct allowing of thoughts to come and go which will help you when difficult situations arise. Because even in the most difficult situation, unless we are believing our thoughts, we cannot cause suffering. Even in the most difficult situations, if we remain in the clarity of who we are, we cannot suffer. So actually, I understand what you meant when you said it is the ego which is understanding. So we don't want that kind of understanding, which means only that it is the mind which is picking up these concepts more and more. But here, what is happening now is the mind is being... all concepts from the mind are being taken away from it, actually. And we are left with the true understanding which is not mental, the true knowing which is not mental, the true seeing which is here now. You are witnessing this entire world as witnessing itself. You are aware of the play of existence as awareness itself. So okay, now I've told you this: that you are that which is aware of this world and you don't exist as a person. Now you have to prove me wrong. Find some evidence that this is not true.

Okay.

Will you look into this? I have said that you are awareness that is aware even of existence, that is aware of every phenomena coming and going. All you have to do now is prove me wrong. So next time when we speak, just tell me how this is not true. So don't try to find the truth; presume that whatever what I am sharing is not true and find out how it is not true. Sometimes you have to flip the game around. Tell me how you are not awareness, but you are actually a person. After looking for a while, after inquiring deeply into it, tell me. Tell me how you are ego or you are a person and you are not awareness.