But... God is Here. - 9th March 2026

Yes, means not fear.

No, was not fear.

Okay. What is apprehension? What is the difference between scariness and fear? A fear is something what touches then my body where a body reaction there was no body reaction no mind reaction.

Yeah. So fear is not necessarily that which touches the body. It could be subtler just felt at the emotional layer. Fear is an emotion. So you feel that.

So whatever we don't have to really identify the exact nature of it. So I don't want to label it but you notice that as you are going into the silence the still place where revelation can happen then all these can come to distract us to come in the way. So we just have to go through all of this. We just have to hold strong, have faith in God and just go through some of this so that whatever the emotions are being thrown at us, we can just go through them like a storm that is coming. You see, and just then when the storm is over, know that the obstacles don't have infinite power. It is only God's love and light which has infinite power. So whichever whatever can come as an obstacle cannot hold on forever. It will try to distract us in whatever way and ask us to get away from that stillness. Stay away from that still holy place in our heart where the revelation can happen. You just have to keep it. You have to remember that. But whatever it is like I went to my heart to the gate of the heart temple but the mind was active but this emotion came but this sensation came. And then we can add another but saying but God is here cannot settle for anything which is not godly as the final conclusion.

This was also evident.

Yes. Exactly. And that's why you say it was light. It is not. You see that's good. So our learning to live in the recognition of God's presence being here is our learning to live in faith. Is it? Huh? So this deepening of faith happens the more we spend time in that holy still place. Then we have turned inwards. Have you seen anyone? Maybe okay I was going to be a bit rude and say mirror but have you seen anyone who has spent the day ridden by Maya? What happened? Only this looks real. I don't know what my face is doing, but I hope it's doing something helpful. But it is just so we so caught up in this and we are just like and then if they've had a good Satsang doesn't have to be this one if they've heard a good Bhajan whatever then what happened? So just that it's not so it's not so tangible as we believe it to be. This world is not so tangible. All this movement is not as real as we take it to be. We don't know what real is anyway. So, it's not as serious as we take it to be. It is just a distraction. It is primarily a distraction away from the vastness the holiness which is, you can reduce a bit my dear, which is calling out to us now bringing us to God bringing us to a greater love you see. Just a distraction from that vastness in here. And sometimes when we turn inwards the mind gives us an interpretation that this is oh you're going to lose yourself in this you will die in this. You see but whatever is going to die in this is very important for that to die. Whatever dies when you are staying close to God, it is important for that one to die. Isn't it? So don't let anything get in the way. What is seeming more real to us now, God or world? In asking this question and trying you're trying to contemplate this question you may fall into the right place. What is real for us now? This what our senses are bringing us.

So what is real for you now? It's also feel like the world is not completely so that you are awareness is seeming real and the world is feeling real right now. I'm saying not any stage but I'm not feeling that then. There's no do it till he's finishing when I'm not I'm just going to do it. I'm aware that I'm aware then the world doesn't seem real. But when I leave when I believe when I when I open my eye now and I see your face then the it starts to look real and I forget that I'm actually also observing it then that thing goes off.

So what is showing you that you are awareness or you are aware?

Because the perception just seems to dissolve become like a it doesn't have a quality or it doesn't have a label of it anymore as some separate thing.

So perception dissolved. So what is showing you that you are aware?

It's nothing showing me that I'm aware there's only this awareness. There isn't some other thing.

Yes. Through what instrument are you recognizing this?

No. No instrument which I can describe in a way.

So are they only perceptions here right now?

Oh, no. Now when you say perceptions, then my attention goes to look for those.

Yes. To Yes. So through attention you do not find that which is beyond perception. Yeah. Yes. Then how do you find?

I just become.

Okay let's get everyone there is are there only perceptions here right now you know in the framing of the question the answer is available but the importance is your insight your recognition not whether you have the right answer conceptually in your experience is there only perception perceptions are there only perceptions right now. And remember the dark empty is still a perception. So if you are imagining a dark empty limbo and a world of light and sound, then both of them are still perceived. Then what else besides this dark and empty and this world of light and sound is there? Anything? No thing. You where are you? In the dark and empty or in the realm of light and sound. Come on. Not rhetorically. I'm asking sincerely. We come back. We'll go to sit up.

Closest. I think I can come to an answer. It feels like a resting place that just is. And that's it. Like it can't be questioned or it's it's just is nothing.

We'll accept that. We'll accept that. So I was saying that if you're not in the dark and empty and you're not in the light and sound, then where are you? And as what you want to say in this what I call nothingness I can't how is that nothingness different from the dark and empty?

Same. I never experience dark and empty.

You never experience that empty. You close your eyes and there's no image, no memory, no imagination. Then what is that? Sometimes in meditation our attention gets fully withdrawn and we don't have any perception left. Then attention rest in a dark and empty. But that dark and empty is also perception. It's a light. It's okay. What witnesses that light?

What witnesses the light? The that which witnesses the light is also light. Then is it dark?

Huh? Okay. Siri is answering. Okay. Soon we have Satsang with agency. So that which witnesses the light, don't get distracted by any sensation. Let it all happen. Don't worry. That which witnesses the light is light or dark?

It's light.

Is light. Okay. What witnesses that light? Any attribute must be witnessed, isn't it?

There is no attribute.

So light is what? What is one thing you can say about that which witnesses both light and dark? And if it is if the answer is nothing then what causes us to say nothing? What capacity have we hit? What have we come to the edge of? The real and the unreal.

Really I can't I can't express.

Yeah. So in contemplating this question in this way we were not accepting any visual or concept we come to that resting space that Sudata was talking about earlier. You see but the resting space is actually the doorway to the portal. See it is the doorway to the portal. Now don't go imagining any portal or door or anything like that. It is only because resting in the resting space the mind will resist a lot. So the attempt is to keep you in an inspired state so that you can wait there patiently.

So in contemplating this question in this way, we were not accepting any visual or concept; we come to that resting space that Sudata was talking about earlier. You see, but the resting space is actually the doorway to the portal. See, it is the doorway to the portal. Now don't go imagining any portal or door or anything like that. It is only because resting in the resting space, the mind will resist a lot. So the attempt is to keep you in an inspired state so that you can wait there patiently. So if we ask the question, what else is here beyond perception, then we don't speculate or visualize; we come to that same door to the temple, same resting space where the true answer has to reveal itself to us. You see, and the true answer revealing itself can come in the form of an insight or it can come in the form of the revelation of the Atma itself first, and then you see that the Atma is showing us the reality of God, the reality of what the true self is, huh? So all of these methods will bring us to that point. Now there we have to wait. You see, and the best way to wait there—I don't know the accuracy of this—is just coming to say the best way to wait there is when we have faith in God's reality, in God's presence. But if you're attached to anything in Maya in that moment, this resting space will at best be an idea. That still, holy place will at best be only an idea.

Yes. In fact, no desire to leave.

No desire to leave. Yes.

But also no holding.

Yes. Because when we are truly in that, we have left our faculties behind. You see, we have left our faculties behind, and yet we will get messaging, you see, from time to time. But what about this? You had this to do. What time is it? You see, oh look at that, look at that. All these things will come, but we have to stay. Because when we stay, what is happening? What is happening when we stay? The photosynthesis is happening from the Atma to the soul; the mifa is happening, as the Sufi would say. There we are getting transformed; our inner instrument is getting transformed into divinity itself. So therefore, we cannot take any speculation or visualization as a replacement for this, because we don't feel that photosynthesis—then it's not a feeling anyway—but you know it intuitively that something is happening, something is transforming somewhere, like something is being fed, something holy, the kana is being dipped into light and honey. You see, I'm scared of using these terms also because these also can become visualization. You can just start to imagine yourself getting dipped in light and honey, and that visualization will actually prevent you from getting dipped in light and honey. You see, that's the thing. So when you are just in that, at that door, it can seem like a very monotone, boring, pointless, lifeless weight, but that door is where the whole transmission, the Atma, is giving itself to the Antahkarana. God is giving himself to us. Huh? So don't settle for anything less or any replacement from the mind or from imagination, because who will you fool? Only yourself. Are you getting a sense of the inner process? This process of self-realization, the process of revelation of God or self-recognition, happens over here.

It's like everything just gets collected, sense of presence.

Yes. There we wait. How long may we wait? Let's say 60 years. Let's say my Shabri example. Forever can sound scary.

But see what happens is that it is the initial 6 minutes that we have to be scared about. You see what is that dunning something something where in the initial 6 minutes something wants to just like, yes, this is what is happening to me like that.

Okay. So that is what we have to just remain in that stillness. Wait. Remember it's a lifetime project. Nothing to rush into. If something has to be expressed, it'll come. It'll be brought to your mouth and it'll be spoken. So your life then becomes led instead of you leading it. You see, but you're not taking anything to be me or mine. The words me and mine become very light in their nature. You're not taking any of that because you're really so deeply immersed in your heart. You're so deeply immersed in that process, in that suntan coming from the Atma. You see, you're so interested in that receiving, that being fed that love and light, that all of these temptations of the world don't mean anything. They don't mean anything. So we come to a deeper recognition of the unreality of the world when we are touched by the reality that we are meeting in the heart. Okay. So don't feel like—because often we use the term of waiting at the doorway of the heart temple—it's not like waiting in line to enter the Indian temple. Okay. It's not an oppressive process. It's not a process in that way. It is the most holy transformative unfolding where our insides are being so cleaned up and made full of love and light that we are beautiful to receive our beloved. You see, we are made beautiful to receive our beloved in that, at that waiting at that door. All the Maya is squeezed out of us waiting at that door. So the hell is squeezed out of us. It can sometimes feel like the hell is being squeezed out of us. So as this operation is happening, sometimes feel so holy and full of love and light and other times feel like that. You see, because we are grasping so strongly at these things and we feel like, no, no, this, no, this, no, this, I don't want, I'm willing to run, not this. You see, don't take my sweeties away, don't take my candy away, because that is all that I valued in the world. So that can seem like a scary part of the process, but it's a very important part of the process. And if you remember our love for God, if we remember what we really want, then Maya will not succeed in making us run away.

The scariness is a little bit, how will this body be able to move?

Exactly this.

So this fear comes, how will this body move if I rest in this still place? How has it moved so far?

Yes, by my ego mind.

Before it was by my ego mind.

And what do the doctors say? Why does the body move?

Doctors don't have answer. Neurological process.

Neurological process. Who fires the nerves?

God.

Yes. So no field of science actually brings us to the first cause. It's only that when we come to our heart inside do we really meet the one that is moving this entire universe. So the mind says, but your body will not move. Say, how does the body move? Oh, the neurons are fired, then the nerves get activated. Who fires the neuron? I'm getting so all very limited knowledge we get stuck in. So don't get bullied by mental knowledge. In a way, we have to have that strength that for this, to find God, if I have to lose this life, then may it be so. Yeah, it's a test of faith. I feel

a test of faith.

And every time our faith is tested, our faith grows. Our faith grows. We deepen in that. What would happen if we were attached to the body or something in this world very strongly and we also found God in our heart? That would be difficult. That would be difficult. So God makes sure that you are ready for him by losing our grasping at the world. You see, otherwise, like we used to say in Satsang, it's like trying to board the aeroplane but making sure that one foot is on the ground. Not possible. If we still attach to what we think we know and we want to meet that, the one that requires complete innocence in the meeting, then that cannot happen, thankfully, by his grace, isn't it? So this question, what else is here beside perception? How will we answer? Or what do you know when you know nothing? How will we answer? Or we say there's a bhajan we were singing the other day, Radhe Radhe Shyam Milade. So please Radhama, make us meet Krishna Ji. So she made it happen. And how will we know whether it happened? You see, our intellect, our imagination cannot go there. We are asking for it, but we will not... We don't know the capacity that we have for such a meeting. Maybe we just feel like we see some great visual of God. But Arjuna saw a great visual of Viratu, but he was not free after that. Okay, because he—I have to again, too small to speak for him—but he probably focused on the visual part and not on the part which is not so visible. So this way or that way, we have to accept the fact that our human faculties are limited, but within ourselves, within our heart, God has planted the capacity to meet him.

Was Arjuna free after the Viratu?

I don't... Yeah, we speculated.

Maybe he... maybe he didn't meet the nunaish, the reality of Krishna within himself without needing to see something.

Now suppose that Krishna came into this room, huh? But you took him just to be the body with which he is making himself visible to us. Then we will immediately normalize and humanize him. Is, I don't know what the fuss was about. He's just another one like us only. So then we may say, okay, now if he had a great halo or aura, you see, that's why in the paintings we have to draw the halos and aura, like, okay, now that makes it special, you see. But does it? It doesn't, because it's just a body with an aura, you see.

Sustain.

Exactly so. And God probably—not probably, obviously—is very well aware of our propensity to normalize and humanize everything. So you know, if I come like that, these ones will not meet my magnificence ever. They will only meet my bodily visual representation. You see, so therefore, the question, what is here besides perception, is very important. No matter what the perception is. See, so if that which we call divine offering or prasad is that perception which may deepen us in that holy looking which is beyond that which is visible. Maya is that which is visible and can be measured in a visible way. Isn't it? So our faith cannot grow if our trust continues to rely only on our thinking and our perceptions, not on the mystery. Our faith cannot really grow if we continue to trust only our perceptions and our thinking, because we are then in utter neglect of the mystery. What is mystery? That which is beyond our current capacity to think or to perceive. And God will always remain mostly mysterious. You see, but mostly mysterious is not bad news. Mostly mysterious is good news because we then have to transcend our limited faculties which we have taken to be the all-important and rely more on that which we call the heart. You see, but the minute we taste the beauty in the heart, what happens? Maya comes, what about this, what about that? Literally sound like that also, all the beauty from our life goes away, just so we have to become vigilant to this, we have to become vigilant to this and not fall for it. So the more we trust our heart, the more we rely on that, the more we will grow in that. So the more we take God's name, we stay in our practice, the more we contemplate these questions, everything that stretches us beyond what we think we know. You see, now the misery of the human condition is that when we come to a conceptual resolution of something, we celebrate. You see, so if I said to you, what is here beyond perception? And you said blah blah blah blue. You see something and it sounds very convincing to your mind. You feel like, good, done. You see, wow, what a great discovery I have made. Nothing. It's rubbish. You see, so that which makes the mystery more mysterious should be celebrated. You see, our conditioning is completely contrary to this. Our conditioning is to come up with answer. Conditioning is to write the answer in examination paper, get marks, then go to the next level. Here it's not that. So deepen in our stillness, deepen in our silence, deepen in our love for the mystery that is God. So that is the pathway of the mystic. The ones who want to live in God's presence, that is the pathway for them. Now what will you do with the conceptual answer anyway? What will you do with it? What will you do with it? You presented people, say shut up. Like with that conceptual conclusion, what will you do? Just feel good about yourself and that I know this. Then the teacher has to keep providing more mystery and something else. We're so quick to know everything.

For the mystery that is God. So that is the pathway of the mystic. The ones who want to live in God's presence, that is the pathway for them. Now what will you do with the conceptual answer anyway? What will you do with it? What will you do with it? You presented people say shut up. Like with that conceptual conclusion, what will you do? Just feel good about yourself and that I know this. Then the teacher has to keep providing more mystery and something else. We're so quick to know everything. So what came in satsang one time was that if to know even one thing was to know too much then what do you know when you know? Okay. When I came I wanted to call it my Shiva meditation because it has this, I feel at least in my case, it has the propensity to chop Maya's head off, the capability to chop Maya's head. It leads us to the doorway of true knowledge. What do you know when you know nothing? Let's pass the mic back to a seeker. So thank you for this.

Initially, I experienced anger and say I'm running like why, why? I can't hear you so well because probably... yeah, so... you're very close to the mic. Just try to speak up. Let's see. Hello, hello, hello. So, initially I felt anger and just like just run away, but I'm also able to see what is making me suffer, you know? This is blessing. Earlier I used to notice it but still why, why to do all this? But seems like this process is necessary, burning or whatever. Yeah. So still the anger still comes, but I'm able to notice it like it is making me suffer.

And if we really want to be free then we have to go through this and like it is false, completely false. It's just ego comes or false identity comes and it's whatever years of conditioning or... but when I let this go, after that it's empty and just I am free.

Exactly. Yeah. So anger is an emotion that comes, but when anger is an emotion that comes it cannot stay for too long. You may have some lingering sensation but anger is elongated when the narrative along with it is believed.

That's a very strong conditioning here.

Exactly. So it offers up all of this conditioning and says now see this is what it is. So that keeps feeding the anger more and more.

And when the anger is there and the narrative is there, the narrative feels very believable. You see, so in those moments, we have to be really vigilant and careful. Just like when anger is there, we completely speak some strange thing like that. We lose even our worldly faculties; they are not functioning at a good level. So then if we can become vigilant that I'm getting irritated, I'm getting angry and I must ignore my narrative especially at this point, then we will find it easier to stay with God and allow it to pass. You see, otherwise the anger becomes a vicious circle that keeps continuing.

It's like childhood conditioning I think. Yes. There's no benefit in it.

Exactly. And like past this week I couldn't do the sitting for sadhana, but the focus was not that much, like sadhana is completely finished. Yes. Nothing was happening before that for two, three days. I noticed something that I was not able to notice for past 15 years I think, something like a thinker thought or the one who wants to understand. There I was identifying subtle thought that also I noticed and then but it's good, but it's happening only in satsang. At home I was not able to notice it much. So it is your grace, your presence.

Thank you. Although it feels like why to go through all this but it's of course this is the only way.

Absolutely. And my prayer is like may I not go with this old conditioning. Thank you. So good. Yes, this is perfect.

I struggled with anger, too. It's become a lot better for me because I don't know wrong or right. I've started saying okay I'm angry and maybe God will help me through this. And when I'm sitting in my stillness then I ask for help with it. And I say if there's something I need to understand with my mind about my anger then please show it to me. And if there's something else I need to do, I'm willing to do it. But for now, and after a while when I was feeling that emotion of anger, I learned some little part of me said okay trust this also, this will also be fine, you'll be helped through this too. And slowly the sting and the burning of the anger started to decrease and now it goes very quickly and I trust that it'll be the anger will whatever God intends.

I think Father, may I speak please?

Yes. Thank you. I don't feel anger in this moment, but I feel very strong that I would shout in all my body. Yeah, it's here. It's present now.

Go for it. What time is it in your country?

It's maybe half past 2.

That's fine. You'll disturb some siesta in the afternoon, but it's inside my body. This energy just right now. Yeah. Yes, it comes like this.

Yeah, it's very good. That's very good because all this comes out of us. It's all this is brought out of us.

I'm very familiar with this one. Yeah. Oh, it's very good. It's worth it to mute everything if you want to. Many times the fear of it is much louder than the actuality. But I have in the past said that a few times and the actuality was actually much worse than the fear of it. Okay, now this one can shout.

I would like to, but I can't really.

Yes. Yes, I understand. I understand that. It's almost like when some release needs to happen but we're not able to even identify the message in that, it just something starts to get out of our system and when it becomes subtler and subtler we can't even find the messaging behind it. It just has to get ejected out of us in some way. I understand but it doesn't have to be ejected in the way that our mind is carrying us with. It can be gentle, sober. It can be shouting. It can be the body may have a reaction. All of these things can happen but we are not to worry about them. We are just to stay more and more with God's love and allow this to unfold in the outer. Thank you.

You're welcome. I'll come to Diwa in just one moment. I just see and I always remember later that I see so many new ones, and now not so new ones but I've seen you often, but you really have come up and ask a question and my hope is that all of you are getting a sense of that holy place where the revelation of the Atma within, of the holy spirit within, can happen and in that revelation the truth about ourselves and the truth about God which is the same is revealed to us in our heart. And if you have any questions about any of this just feel free to come up, just don't be shy because being shy is not worth it. One time what happened is that somebody was with me in Bangalore for 6 months. And she was the first one from overseas to start to follow me. So many times she was the only one in my house when we were sharing satsang and I was sharing a particular point for 6 months. Every day almost I was sharing a particular point and then I said to her as she was leaving to go back to her country that just it's simple, just follow this and she said, 'Ananta, this is the one thing that I don't agree with.' And I say, 'Now it is time to go to the airport, that's when you tell me and you've been hearing this quietly for 6 months?' You see, so if there's something like that, maybe there's a misunderstanding, maybe your mind is presenting it differently, maybe I'm just being foolish as usual. So if there's something you feel is getting in your way, just feel free to come up and share. I don't want to of course force it and I don't want to put you on the spot and force you to have a question or something that will be a bit unnatural and convoluted, but just know that if nervousness is getting in your way or there's some fear of how you will be perceived is getting in the way then don't worry about those things and if you want we can always edit out before publishing on YouTube. We can always edit out. So feel free, feel at home. Let's go to Diwa.

I just want to ask for your guidance and also blessing because I see that when you ask the question of can you stop being... okay... and I see that sometimes like something is like I don't know how to explain it, like there's a sense of letting go and something is trying to marinate in like the sauce or something like this, the edge of my being, trying to marinate, but sometimes I find that there's like a kind of tension, like a kind of subtle sort of tension, and other times it feels like almost like something is twisting, like it's like some screwdriver or something inside in my inside is like turning it and honestly it's like something is twisting the thing like in a very subtle thing and it's like a tendency to interpret. Is this because I'm mostly, it's like something prefers to feel or I prefer to feel like the sense of expansion and the love and this kind of thing and peace, but when that turning... it's just like I don't want this thing. So, that's what I'm seeing. And sometimes by God's grace, I see that there's a sense of witnessing the sense of whose voice is this? Is this God speaking or is it just like my humanness speaking and trying to not stay in that? And also I also say that the... like is staying in... when you say that where do you see that you're just aware? It seems like there's a kind of ground, like something that is a sort of ground of being.

Yeah, that's in terms of words like it seems like that's the only way that I can express it. Seems like it's a ground and no matter what I do, I cannot remove it. Somehow it's like I just can't move the ground. I think the ground is only not there when I'm asleep or something, like when I'm in deep sleep.

Yeah. But I don't know if this is what you mean when you say like the beingness, stop being. Yeah. Yeah. Cuz it's like it's just there. Sometimes I forget about it. But then when I leave everything it seems like that's the only... I don't know how to say, it's just there and it seems like everything is held in this ground somehow and also when moving and speaking and everything, sometimes also it's like a kind of fear because it almost seems like none of this whole thing is really true, like it's not really true in the same way. I don't know how to explain it. And sometimes some fear, it's like almost like existential, but then I just offer it to God because it's just like almost like it's not true. Like it's not really true that we're really here and it's almost like we kind of dream somehow. It's like it's not really true. But obviously I cannot see this, I can only see it here somehow. But I just keep it like in my heart that secret and something in me still seems to be like a maybe a subtle sense of not being able to understand something. But I'm pretty sure it's at the mental level. Like there's some mysterious sense of something is still there, mysteriousness, cuz I still see so much like limitation and the inability to really serve God well and also at the same time this is there. So it's just like that I don't understand. Yes. Like it's not this thing, it's not there and also I don't know if this is something that you've spoken about, like when the introspection sometimes it feels like something, it feels I'm doing the introspection and other times it feels like I just say the name.

Still there like mysteriousness because I still see so much like limitation and the inability to really serve God well and also like at the same time this is there. So it's just like so that that I don't I don't understand. Yes. Like it's it's not this thing. It's not there and also I don't know if this is something that you spoken about like when the introspection sometimes it feels like something it feels I'm doing the introspection and other times it feels like I just say like the name of God or something like that and it feels like that takes over the introspection somehow and so I begin to see like the difference in the quality of when it seems like some are like an aspect of consciousness.

Let's pause on this particular one and we'll take the first one first because this one also is very beautiful and I want to speak about active and passive recollection. But let's go to the first one which is that when the question is asked, can I stop being? Now you see, and I was a very foolish naive child when I started sharing this in Satsang because the expectation was extremely high from my perspective. You know, it was just like I will ask this question, everyone will fall into innocence immediately and go to that holy place where the real recognition of the ground, which doesn't ever go unless you're in deep sleep, you see. So I like, can you stop being now? Can you stop? Can't stop, you see. But what happens is that what I didn't realize in my naivety at that time is that when I'm framing the question like that, obviously everyone knows the right answer. So, but now hopefully it's less naive to ask this question to all of you, like can you stop being? Can you stop being? Now when it is said, see that you cannot, how will you see? Through which eyes will you see that it's not a perceptual recognition of beingness which is being asked to be confirmed? It is not a perceptual I-amness that we are asking to be confirmed. It is a very, very primal recognition. But in the play of Maya, even this most primal insight seems to be lost.

In my own case, when Maharaj said, just stay with the sense I am, I could not find this I am for years and I don't know. I was just relying, this was long, long ago, so I was just relying on the book and somehow God's grace kept me safe, otherwise I would have easily visualized some sense of presence and held on to that and say, see, I have to just be with that visual of that. So something kept me honest, integrous and safe. Maybe it was Maharaj itself kept saying, integrity is the most important, integrity is the most important. It's like, no, till I'm absolutely clear in my heart that this is beingness, I'm not going to just say, okay, I am with my sense of I-amness, because a question like that can seem like a beginner question in spirituality, especially this kind of Satsang, but actually it's the fundamental question and it doesn't matter if you take 50 years to answer it. So if my mind is like, quick, quick, can you stop being, can you stop being? So, but we can really dive into this question and the revelation of course will happen at the same point of revelation.

So Dwan said very beautifully that he senses that it's like a ground, like a substratum of the waking state, which doesn't go anywhere except when we go into deep sleep, must be pointers to us for our introspection, but we must not make visuals out of them for ourselves. We start to imagine some ground and then waking state, and very quickly, because we get frustrated on the spiritual process, we want to accept the visual to be the reality. So we are very quick to accept visualization to be the reality. So when a fellow brother or sister shares the insight, we must use them as pointers for our own deepening, not to hold on to a framework which language needs to express itself in. So can you stop being? Can you not be? And if you were to just be with the intellect, then the intellect will say, yes, when I'm asleep or when I die, I won't be. How do I know what I will? So those kind of answers are completely unimportant and uninteresting at this point because we don't want the intellect version of the answer. We don't want any speculation of this answer. Can you stop being? You see, and just to answer the first part of what he said, we can have an expectation that this kind of question must lead to so much expansiveness. It's like an expansiveness we feel. So beautiful it sounds. Can I stop being? But often what may happen is like some contraction, some fear, something that blocks us from being able to actually dive into the heart and look. You see, and that we must go through all of that because these are all our vasana, all our conditionings emptying themselves. So don't look at them as if they are coming. Look at them as if they're going. You see, these things are going. They're not coming. When you ask the question, then all of this tightening, all of this squeezing is going from you. It's going. So, you may experience it like a coming, but remember that it's being released. It was inside you. It's just emptying yourself out. Because when you empty your Antahkarana of all of this, empty your inside, your inner instrument, your soul of all of this, then there is space for the recognition or for the living with the living presence of God. And that's what we want.

And when you are able to come to the answer of this question, then the question can be asked, what is aware of that, or who is aware even of being, or just simply, are you aware now? So even this question I would ask very naively and say, aren't you aware now? Are you aware now? You see, but most of us, I realize later of course, so stupid I am and was, that most of us are not yet able to distinguish between perception and awareness. You see, so we take our sight to be awareness or we take our hearing to be awareness. Who is aware of sight, or what is aware of sight? What is aware of hearing? That for that recognition again we need to go to the same place. The question is very useful because the questions bring us to the same place.

We'll come back to BI in a moment. Don't worry. Capital Witnessing. But let me speak for myself. Let me not speak for anyone else. For years I feel I did not, now it's very difficult to tell because some time has passed, but for me I feel like for many years I was stuck in taking perceiving to be the witnessing or sight to be the witnessing, you see. So that movement of attention in the form of providing perception to us is not awareness. We are aware of that. We are aware of sight. We are aware of hearing. But because to meet myself as awareness or even to say that I am aware, we cannot see it through the traditional modes of knowledge. You see, and yet the mind offers us attention as a replacement for awareness. That's why I used to call it the twin. It's very similar because name one attribute of attention. Can't name an attribute of attention except that it seems limited. If you ask a question and you ask a question and you ask a question, I'll be like, slow down, only one I have. I don't have all the attention. You see? So unlike awareness, attention is limited. So that is the only thing we can really tell from our intellect and from our attention itself. But what is the true nature of awareness? Where can we tell from? How will you know that you can't stop being?

So, how will you know that you can't stop being? Speculate? We can speculate and conclude, but that would be like I said the worthless answer. We really, really know. How can we really, really know? What's... you know St. Elizabeth, you're saying that in order to be able to live with God like continuously you have to be dead and I wasn't understanding what she meant by that. So that this question of can you stop being, so it's like something is trying to go to non-existence somehow, like to find out where can, how far can I go where I don't, I'm no longer here somehow and so like it's a very strange, I don't know what is doing that, it's just so the question is like it's going, seems to be going to the source but it's not like a going with attention. It's like a going in terms of like just a subtlety of like...

Yes, because even to answer which instrument are we able to answer this question from, you see, is at the same level of difficulty to the mind as the original question, can I stop being, because it has no access to that answer. And therefore, so somewhere we know even in our mind-intellect that this will lead to the death of the false, you see, and the death of the false is a requirement to live in the truth. So detachment from Maya is a requirement before we can access this truth. And I don't want to spell it out so much. I've already spelled it out like many, many times. But I see some freshness in this sharing at least in the room and I can see some in Zoom also that because I've not shared like this for quite some time, there's some, it's being received with some freshness and aliveness, you see. So I'm happy to keep it at this level without providing you more answers which will just become conceptual answer. See, so how do you know that you can't stop being? And in that if something seems to get squeezed or feel like death is coming, all of that is very good. All of that is very, very good because it's stretching you. Let me not say too much, but it's stretching you out of the old modes. See, the old modes cannot survive in the light of questions like this.

Yeah. Because it just feels like there's something is like there's like a kind of ground and then something is like that and it's like so it feels like that and so...

See, but see the thing is that there's a ground and then there's a grasping at the ground. Now the grasping at the ground will be shaken out. You see what happens with the mind-intellect system is that any received is then made into constructs and visuals and you see so that it can feel like now I have really understood it. Now you're meeting the ground at the holy place but the mind-intellect system can try to make a ground out of that ground. Do you know what I mean? You can try to conceptualize it into something and that by God's grace will continue to be shaky because it's not that you cannot rely on that. So you'll be forced to go to that holiness every time which is beyond human grasping. And that's so beautiful. It's making me so happy.

That's why you're saying that like God you can like hand over the inquiry to God. Yeah. It's actually very true because it's when the things happening and something just let go and just allow like just it's like a kind of surrender and I'm realizing in the inquiry as well like surrender is very important to just it's like it's what they both want.

Now the thing is that once you resonate with a question like this, once like most of humanity will not resonate with a question like this, but by God's grace for some strange reason some of us resonate with a question like that. Once you resonate with a question like that, then everything that needs to happen will happen in the process of you seeking the answer in your heart. So the surrender is bound to happen because you will feel like anything you hold on to for yourself cannot survive. Either the question will survive or that will survive. You see, so it's so beautiful that our insides, our inner instrument, our soul's wisdom is so deeply programmed in this way by God that when our heart compass gets attracted in this way to a holy question like that which can break the clutches of Maya and bring us to the true insight. Then in the asking of this question sincerely, faithfully, honestly, all that needs to happen as a part of that is happening on its own. We start, we just watch. Oh, surrender needs to happen. It's happening because I can't hold on to this idea of the world and myself and really immerse myself in this question. You see, I cannot hold on to any notion of Dwan. I cannot hold on to any idea of being and not being or anything which I can really put a frame on.

of maya and bring us to the true inside. Then in the asking of this question sincerely, faithfully, honestly, all that needs to happen as a part of that is happening on its own. We start we just watch. Oh, surrender needs to happen. It's happening because I can't hold on to this idea of the world and myself and really immerse myself in this question. You see, I cannot hold on to any notion of Dwan. I cannot hold on to any idea of being and not being or anything which I can really put a frame on. You see, so I have to keep letting it go, letting it go. So the surrender is happening as we sincerely allow ourselves to be with this question.

He said like that's why even like we say even the concepts of God are going as well into like the living presence. Yes. This thing is alive. I feel it. It's like cannot be denied the power of this.

Yeah. Yes. Okay. So happy to hear. Very good. Let's go to where I really feel like it's like after 14 years I feel like of of really trying to ask this question. I feel first time I'm seeing in all of your eyes that the question is actually being received.

Yeah, it's feeling something. Show us that presence.

Yeah. So it had to like the impatience of that silly boy was ahead in some way and then by God's grace all of this cleaning up all of this looking all of this deepening let me not say too much celebrate too early.

So Father like most of the day like when I'm in my mind or I'm thinking something I'm not being I'm not I am not there. I am kind of lost. So like is that to stop being or how is it?

It's when you superimpose something on top of I amness. So when you say I am behave or I am man or I am good, I am truthful anything. So that superimposition has the ability in a way to cloud our vision. You see, so it's not that you stop being, it's that you take yourself to be something else that is existent which is that man or that boy or that truthful one or that whatever attribute you see. Now in the play of attributes the substratum seems to get hidden just like the surface of the ocean seems to get hidden if there are waves. You see as we get rid of belief identity in these attributes then we see more and more the surface starts to become apparent and we realize the surface actually never went anywhere but it because of the superimposition of the false identity the true being seemed to be hidden you see and then our conditioning becomes so strong that we say just stay with your being itself says where is this being? He can't find it because we got so used to using only our mind and our senses. We're just looking for it. Where is it? Where is it? This is the strangeness. So when Kabir Ji said this is what he meant that we are thirsting in the water itself and actually we are water itself thirsting for water. So which is the strangest irony of our condition that we cannot find the very basis of our existence because we can only find body people things because we're so used to using only this instrument. So because we got used to only using the microwave, yeah, we have forgotten where the gas stove is. Now when we stop using the microwave so much, and I'm not giving any kitchen advice. I'm just using a metaphor that when you stop using that so much you you will start to look more deeply for the another source of heat or light or fire. So when we stop relying on our false identity then by God's grace we will fall into the place where we can recognize our true nature. So we may call that Sat-Chit-Ananda, we may call it Buddha nature, we may call it Christ consciousness, whatever you may want to call it. So the dust of ignorance has to be cleaned up. The truth shines on its own light. But you can't stop being in the sense that even in the superimposition I am a man. See we can't do without the I amness.

Looking at it. It's like the eye doesn't stop amming like that. I just and it's also like the like my the heart temple is there and the presence is there but when these things become real then like it's like the light is not shining on that it just

When the world seems real things of the world attachment seem real. Yes.

And then it goes away. Yeah. And yeah this question just can keep bringing me back to this the same place no like the heart

Like I said in Satsang. So when I was trying to work on that notebook I was using help of a tool to just pull out the excerpts from the transcripts and it reminded me then in one Satsang I said that it's not like there's a station A and a station B. You see if you ask this question it'll go to station A. If you pray to God it'll go to station B. It all goes to the same place. Yes. When we look at let's say can I stop being and we pray and we invoke Lord Ram. You see in words those questions may be very different but in the answering they have to be from the same place. Did he have some more to ask or

So forgot actually. Good. I forgot but one thing that I was also saying that when I ask who am I I'm also coming back to that same thing same question that can I stop being right to find my true nature

Yes because the question is like the pathway that brings us to that point. Once we at that point, what was exactly the construct or the semantics of the question is unimportant. It's like a deep yearning for truth is the same as the deep yearning for love is the same as the deep yearning for God. And that yearning brings us to that point. Now it doesn't matter whether we wanted love or truth or beauty or God. You see it just brings us to that same point.

One more thing Father. So can I ask this question that who is it that is thinking or who is it that is watching the thoughts like can I go further for that? Who is ask who is watching these thoughts?

I am this eye. Tell me one thing about it. Sorry. It is here. I am here.

Here where there's no location.

So you are in a locationless here. Yes. How you know that? What within you can locate the locationless cuz you say I am here then I say where is here? You see it doesn't have a location. So somewhere in you you are recognizing the locationless. Where is that? Are you seeing this locationlessness? Is it a perception?

Not able to do it.

It's okay. It's not. You remember that we can never do it. We can only sincerely ask. The doing is a revelation. You see, so what we do when we ask any holy question like that, who am I? Where am I? Can I stop being? Am I aware now? Then we can sincerely ask the question. But the doing which means the revelation of the answer will only happen by the Atma itself. You see but the beauty of what we are discussing is that in asking the question we put ourselves in the most receptive of places to receive the answer. Yes. You see, unless we are trying to do it. You see, so we have to be at that strange place where we asking very sincerely, but we asking not in the mode of solving, but we asking in the mode of receiving. You see? So it's not like a mathematical formula that you will solve. It's a sincere question that you're asking. And you leave yourself open to receiving in faith. You see, and the more you leave yourself open to receiving, the more your faith will deepen. Yes. Yes. So never have this pressure on yourself that I am not able to solve it cuz if you solved it, it'll be the wrong answer. God has to solve it. God has to show you show you the answer, reveal the truth. That's why that our being relaxed is very important for our receptivity because if you're stressed about getting to the answer then how will we receive? You're too busy solving. Yes. Now this aspect is often forgotten in the modern world. You can feel like do it you can ask and you can resolve the answer who am I? You can't you don't have the faculties to resolve this answer because if the answer was mental it would be useless. If it was just a judgment in the intellect it would be useless. If it was something that you perceived it would come and go. If it was just an emotion you felt it would linger for a while but then go away as well. So the truth has to be revealed by the Atma itself. But we have to give our consent to be receptive to that answer. You see, so all our consent to being open and empty is our consent to receive from the spirit. That is why the process is graceful and faithful. It is not mental or intellectual. But know that even in that openness, in that receptivity, there is tremendous holiness. It is not an insipid waiting. It is a beautiful transformation which is undergoing. So the receiving of God, the receiving of the beloved will happen when the bride is ready. And the bride is made ready in this process of openness allowing all of its avidya, all of its grasping to be squeezed out of it, and for God's light to shine within our soul. So the paradox of the extreme patience needed for the revelation and the very instant nature of the insight is something which the mind cannot fathom. You see the paradox because like that you see and yet so it's the cleanup process which needs a lot of patience. The insight is here timelessly but is hidden. Just so the more you can empty yourself of the grasping, the more ripe you are for the guest to come for dinner in your heart. You cannot have replacement guest ready. Say, okay, it doesn't look like the guest is coming. So, let me serve my pride. Let me serve my greed. Let me serve my lust. Let me serve all of these things. So if you have these replacement guests lined up then what do you feel the guest will come? You see we we often use this example know that we have to keep setting the table for God to come and when he comes is up to him but there's a way to make that table more seemingly from whatever little we can understand more worthwhile for God which is our humility our faith our devotion our trust all of these things our patience our love for him. So these are attractive for God to come. But if we say okay now I've been trying this but it's not happening. Let me just grasp on to some people instead. Let me create relationships instead. Let me get some more money instead. Let me fulfill my lust instead. All of these thing you see then we are filling the table with the wrong guest. Anyway, it's not good company for God. So to be in Satsang, the company of the truth, then we must keep all that is false away. All that is false away. All that serves the me must be kept aside.

Father, I see that when I'm trying to ask the question, there is lot of grasping, trying to conclude, trying to be impatient. But I see that I have to be in a receptive state rather than be patient.

As the question has got you, you see, then if it has got you, then even all of this will be wiped clean. You will see it's pointless. You will see it's pointless. I'm trying to grasp. You may even come to Satsang with an answer. You will hear from me. It's not the answer. You'll go through all of that loop and you'll stop grasping at it conceptually. You will give up on those faculties. So once the the question has got you, then all you have to do is sincerely keep checking. Just sincerely keep checking. Then all these tendencies will start to get cleaned up. You don't have to super micromanage it. Just sincerely what is the answer? That's what's important. Just then the mind is troubling you. It'll because the checker guy will come and say see this is what is happening. This is right. This is wrong. No just who is witnessing the thought. You see if it's trying to provide you any more input besides that but see now this is what's happening who is witnessing this thought keep it on track

It just doesn't want me to be with the question it wants to

Exactly. So if this question has got you or the who am I question has got you or the can you stop being question has got you are you the aware now question has got you whatever it has to get a somewhere that I can't do without knowing the truth. I'm tired of living a lie. You see, it becomes so compelling that we become tired of living the lie of the false me. I have to know what is here, who is here.

It just doesn't want me to be with the question, it wants to. Exactly. So if this question has got you, or the 'who am I' question has got you, or the 'can you stop being' question has got you, are you the aware now question has got you, whatever it has to get a somewhere that I can't do without knowing the truth. I'm tired of living a lie. You see, it becomes so compelling that we become tired of living the lie of the false me. I have to know what is here, who is here. So when this question takes this kind of intensity, then all these obstacles cannot survive.

Thank you. Thank you. And note that asking the question 'who am I' is no different from saying that I want to meet God. So don't try, don't let your mind create duality between Jnana and Bhakti.

Can I ask something about that? I think I asked something like this before so I apologize in advance. It seems as though when you are guiding us in more of a Bhakti context, we talk about setting the table for God and it's up to him whether or not we will receive his grace or his darshan. So we wait. Not wait, but we wait. And it seems as though when the guidance comes in more of an Advaita form, the recognition cannot be avoided. So maybe I know that I'm mentalizing something here, but it seems as though there's nothing like it's up to God. It's more like it's up to you. Something like this.

This is, thank you. Thank you for asking this again because this was exactly what we just discussed with Barab. So let me re-emphasize that point that what can we do, that which sounds extremely intellectual and important like the question 'who am I' is actually a very simple question: 'who am I?' We just ask the question sincerely. You see, now it is not true that anyone who is asking this question in this moment is coming to the revelation of who they are. You see, now if they are asking sincerely, they may come to the limit of where their insides can go, their inner instrument can go, and that is the gift of the wisdom of the soul. But there are many who ask this question for decades without coming to the true revelation of who they are. In the same way, anyone who wants to meet Ram or Jesus or Allah or Krishna may keep invoking them at the same holy place and may have to wait for many decades before the revelation comes.

Even if the guidance is fully followed?

Yes, that's the case. Yes. Yes. Yes. Because what can we do? What do we have to do to follow the guidance? It's very simple. You see, if it is self-inquiry, we are just asking 'who am I?' The mind may produce an answer. We say, 'who witnesses that thought?' If an answer comes, 'I do,' then we ask again, 'who is this I?' It's actually a process for seven-year-olds. You see, our spiritual pride makes it seem like it's very complicated. Actually, it's very, very simple.

Well, there is the subtlety of the mind appearing in a way that sometimes we cannot, sometimes we overlook it and we get lost in the process.

Yes. But I'm saying in the instruction manual it's actually very simple. Now, because our conditioning is so deep, when we try to live up to that it may not seem that simple, but it doesn't make it more highly intellectual is what I'm saying. It's not a supremely intellectual process. In the same way, when we do the neti neti, we are saying anything that changes, I am not that. You see, now a seven-year-old can understand the concept behind that. You see that anything that changes, I have to put that in the basket of 'I am not that,' neti neti neti. So it's a very simple set of instructions. Of course, we face a lot of trouble conditioning in trying to do the process, but that doesn't make it a highly intellectual process. Now, the question is that every time we ask the question 'who am I,' is it a prerequisite that the answer will be found? No, because then everybody who asks 'who am I' would be self-realized.

Sometimes when a teacher is guiding, maybe I'm thinking about other teachers now, but sometimes because when they are guiding in that way and the Advaita way, it almost seems as though it is expected that if the guidance is followed that you find what I'm pointing you at right now.

Yes. Yes. And I used to make the same mistakes. So that's why I said that when I started sharing satsang, in that naivety I would just say, 'can you stop being,' expecting everyone to fall into the innocence of the heart instantly and just check from there. But I realize now that when the answer comes, 'can I stop being' is based on some conclusion that we make conceptually or based on some phenomenal evidence of existence. You see, it is not really based on the revelation in the heart. You see, what is being? Being is the presence of being, it is the Atma itself. Being is Saguna Brahman itself. So, the revelation of the Atma, the revelation of Saguna Brahman will happen when it is the grace of God for it to happen.

Is it true Father if I say that the Bhakti path or the Bhakti process of coming back to God is a little bit more of a receptive and opening path and the path of Jnana is a little bit more of a seemingly proactive path? Not conceptual, I'm not going to that, it's not the intellectual question, it's more of a... seems as though I'm taking a bit of a step and in the other one is more of opening.

Don't worry. It's a very good question. Don't worry. Why? We just conversing. Don't worry. So now you see, not a conceptual way. Now what instrument can we be proactive with except the mind-intellect? It seems as, yeah, when I said intellect, not intellectually, I didn't mean the question, now I meant the process of Jnana, the process of self-inquiry, proactively in a sense of the intention of really looking and seeing what I can find and seeing, 'is this true?' and then looking again and then looking again.

As much as we, sorry if I'm cutting, but as much as we try to perceive, believe the Lord, our Atma will never become an object of our perception, you see.

Yes, not looking as a perception. I'm sorry to interrupt you, but I just want because I want to make sure that I'm being proactive in the looking which is not perceptual.

I would be proactive in the looking that is, yeah, I meant looking like an investigation. That's what... but that would be perceptual or conceptual. Can you investigate?

So let me just say something and then we come back to directly answering this question. I would feel that the openness and receptivity needed for Jnana path, the being open and empty, let's say proactively, is more important in the Jnana marga than in the Bhakti, because in the Bhakti marga at least you can change God into the central protagonist, you see, and safely live in narratives which are centered on God. In the Jnana path, you have to be completely open and empty. There's no room for...

Okay, I'm with you. You see, I mean, like how to be proactive intuitively.

No. Yeah, I think I'm with you now. I think I meant more of the path of being very alert to the suggestions of the mind and really investigating the suggestions. Not holding on to something, but being alert, and I think that's what I meant by productivity. That's a good thing to look at. So I would just feel like it's more like just when we are so empty that we are not grasping at the content of our thought. So more proactively empty, if that helps in some way. Not mean, but you see how that can be misunderstood to be proactively like when we say proactively looking or investigating, it can seem like I have to use my faculties to try and come to the truth. No, no, no, no, no. It's good that we clarify this point because you were not in a confusion about that. It's a very, very common confusion that all I have to do is look more deeply. All I have to do is look harder. You see, but no, it's not in these faculties of looking that we are talking about. We are talking about the heart faculty. We're talking about our intuitive faculty. And there's no harder or longer or deeper. We have no such levers to control with our heart. We can just be open and empty and remain there receptive.

Maybe sometimes it's that it's not really for me, it's not really an intellectual path, Jnana, but sometimes it does feel more like effort to inquire than to say the name.

Yes, it can feel more like effort because we have to ask the question sincerely as much as we can, and that is why many, many Bhaktas have said that they can't imagine the difficulty of the Jnana path; they just love Bhakti because of that, you see. And many Jnanis say that we just so much want to dive into the absolute truth of it that we could not be bothered to spend time on any sort of narrative at all, even if the narrative is about God. So both have their own temperaments and benefits or ups and downs, but the beautiful thing is that the sages have reverence for both the paths. So like Sri Ramana Maharishi himself said that Bhakti is the Jnana mata, which means that Bhakti is the mother of Jnana. You see, now another sage may say that Jnana is the mother of Bhakti also; it's fine, it depends on who they were talking to at that point. That's why the safest way to look at it is two wings of one bird, as Bhagavan said. Two wings of one bird; we may initially be attracted to flap one side of ourselves, but ultimately we have to flap both sides.

Yeah, they just seem to come according to the moment, except like I told you before, when there is too much confusion then I just go to the name because I don't want to let the mind confuse me like that, but otherwise when it's more organic there seems to be a dance between the two. Sometimes both at the same time. But I wanted to ask you something specifically about the name since we're talking. It's that you know how you talk about choosing the name according to your affinity with the form of God and the avatar, and I have more of a relationship with Jesus than anyone else in that sense. So that's why I say his name, but I find that when, for I don't know how I can say this... even though I know very little about Ram and maybe that's exactly the reason why the word, the name Ram, maybe because of the sound itself or maybe because of my lack of concepts around it, sometimes seems to resonate or be even more of a balm or maya than the name of Jesus. So sometimes I feel more to say Ram than Jesus, even though I don't feel I know much about Ram or have a relationship with that story or anything.

I think that's it. That's what I wanted to. So in India the river Ganga is considered the holy river, and her water is supposed to be a great blessing for all of us. So should I drink the water in Haridwar or Rishikesh? Rishikesh is cleaner. You see, but Ganga may not really buy into that, saying it's the mother, it's the holy mother, it doesn't matter. So just like that, it is what our heart is drawn to. I'm not giving a straight answer because I'm well aware that sometimes when we are into our practice the mind wants to provide us different solutions and get us away, and sometimes it's a heart calling. So, I don't feel like we know enough yet to recognize whether it's a heart calling truly or it's a mind's tactic to get you away from what is actually, you know, your heart's true love.

It's the holy mother, it doesn't matter. So just like that it is what our heart is drawn to. I'm not giving a straight answer because I'm well aware that sometimes when we are into our practice the mind wants to provide us different solutions and get us away and sometimes it's a hard calling. So, I don't feel like we know enough yet to recognize whether it's a heart calling truly or it's a mind's tactic to get you away from what is actually your heart's true love.

I feel it's more of a calling and what the mind says is Father said the name that you have more of a relationship with. That's maybe that's the question is does it need to be the name of the one that we have that relationship with or can it be the name that resonates the most right now?

Let's do a quick experiment right now without thinking if you had to spend the rest of eternity with Jesus or Ram who would you spend it with?

Jesus.

Okay, let's stay with that for now. You know that it's all good news. It can never be the wrong answer. It's all God is one and he will receive your prayer whether you refer to him as Jesus or Ram. Just why I said like this is because this affinity, know that we can safely surrender to Ram. Just like if I had to spend like a gazillion years now with one, who would that one be? Then if it comes naturally, then that's a safe answer. We don't have to worry.

Okay. Thank you. Proactive, please say like when you say that heart knowledge is a layer within and it can be met. All that needs to be done is stop relying on thought and perception of the complete truth. So there seems to be something proactive I do in the sense like if I know somewhere that I love God and I try to meet it. It becomes like a treasure hunt kind of thing and...

No wait, good, we are going well. So now before I accept the treasure hunt construct, see if you have the faculty to do the treasure hunt over there in the heart. How would you do it?

I asked the question where do I know I love God.

Yes.

And some thought might come, Ram is so something something. I let it go. I detach from it. So that is letting go of the false which is the proactive step.

Yes. And there's some, but the receiving of the truth is an openness and receptivity because there's no faculty to go and doing any search over there. No. Where is God? What would research? Once like it's this seems like a perception, I don't know whether it's an imagination or whether it's actually there like I can cling onto a thought or a perception and I detach from it and there seems to be a gradual sinking deeper.

Yes, but you cannot do the gradual sinking part. You can do the detaching.

I can do the detach, that is fine, but this is also a perception. Sinking deeper.

Okay, then detach from that also.

Yes, no, then I don't know what to do after that like...

Exactly, that open, surrendered, faithful. So this whole construct of we have to come to that point where we no longer know what to do. But the construct of deeper, what to do with that, that is fueling. Any concept, leave. Those were pointers to get you to that point, you see. Now if you keep saying but deeper, deeper, deeper, then we have to leave that. Deeper is not providing you some complete answer. The concept, it won't be either perception or thought that...

Yeah, everything, that also.

So I just, I don't know, that's it. Even that. So the openness, emptiness, receptivity, listening, heart listening is the very essence of the spiritual process whether it's bhakti or jnana. There is nothing, and again I'm saying this from being the foolish one to make these mistakes also where like, no look harder, do it, do it, you can't do, do it, do it. We can just in the strength of our conviction to drop that which is false, that we can do proactively. Not falling for it. No, not falling for it. Not falling for it. But in the positive, let's call it the positive recognition of the truth, we don't have, it doesn't have these levers. There's no quantifying it. There's no like let's be more intuitive, let's be more Atma. There's no like how we can, that's just a gift that we receive. So therefore the whole notion of labeling somebody as a failure as a spiritual seeker or somebody else as a success as a spiritual seeker is all rubbish. You see, because that part which everybody's asked to do, everybody can do and does. The revelation is completely God's grace. See, we come to the holy place and whether through following the fragrance of love or asking the question who am I or repeating God's name, we all end up there. You see now to gauge that on the basis of time, then Ma Shabri was one of the worst spiritual seekers, 60 years she took. It is not that, it's completely revelatory, graceful and faithful as a process and all our prodding as teachers of God has to be prodding too. Don't get stuck in the false. Don't get stuck in the false. But I can never ask any of you why aren't you seeing the truth? Why haven't you seen the truth yet? Why haven't you seen the truth yet? God. Let's go to Samya.

Hi Father, can you hear me well?

Hello my child. Yes I can.

Thank you Father for again allowing us to speak with you. Just thanks, thank you so much for that. I was just burning with too much negativity that I was not even remembering. That's why I just wanted to come to you because I still believe them. That's the one thing, it was such a long time that I didn't experience such a negative wave of feelings and it's not pleasant and it came with old feelings and old stories and all these things and just during the Satsang only once I felt like oh maybe this is just a state but still I'm not sure so I just wanted to throw myself to you basically because it's not pleasant to be in this, to be here and also with old stories and you know.

Yes, I can understand. All our conditionings, all our conditioning is these old stories, these old grooves that keep pulling us back in and we get into the same patterns. So now with God's name and with the self inquiry in the same situation we are trying to create new grooves which are now taking us to God. Taking us to God by remembering God instead is very difficult. I'm not saying it's easy but when we are able to transcend our oldest stories, oldest deepest conditioning and replace them with pathways to God instead by loving God, remembering God, self inquiry, repeating his name, then those old conditions which is called avidya gets wiped clean from our lives and we learn to live in God, live in his presence no matter what the external world may be throwing at us.

No one is throwing anything Father.

No one is throwing. Yes.

No, it's not something like this. But yeah, it's just to be in this same situation. I don't know like it's a rebellion towards God. This is arising like will it continue like this or...

That you have to say. The wanting my will, the separation from God is always just a rebellion from God. It's like we feel like God himself can feel oppressive at some points. You just feel like I want to be free. Don't control me. You see, Adam himself bought into that story from the serpent and he said no, I'm going to be free and unoppressed by God. Now, so the rebellion against God is based on the idea that my will is what I really want.

Yes Father. I'm sorry. May I speak a little bit openly, please? I feel like I need this. Before it was more loud. I told you just before the other Satsang it's sometimes challenging with staying with family and it's not about just staying with family. There's one private thing but I don't want to share it openly. Maybe you already know it. And sometime it doesn't bother me when I'm with God. It doesn't bother me at all. But sometimes also energetically when it is just too challenging, it's just like how can even this situation can be like it's so strange Father to be in that situation at the same time. I don't know, I'm just in the confusion of this because when you are with God, it doesn't bother you, but also it affects you being with God. So it's just something complicated. I'm sorry. When you're with God's presence, you say it doesn't bother you then...

And at the same time it affects me to be not with God's presence as also like that situation also has an effect on my being with God or not like I had a support before so that's why it wasn't bothering me outward like being in the presence of a teacher because this online is not enough anymore. So yeah, when I don't have this opportunity now, so energetically it's just so hard. And one more thing I want to share, I decided I don't know what to say more, just for Father.

I'm sorry, but I just want to ask God to change my situation outwardly as well. I just want to be in more supportive presence like I think I accept what he has given me. But I think it doesn't work anymore. So without turning into a problem, I just want to pray for him to change that situation.

We must pray for it. We must pray for it. And we must try, I know it's very difficult, but we must try and trust his timeline. It's difficult in some situation, in many situations very difficult. Many times our faith is not about whether he will resolve it but about the when. Our wanting our timeline for the resolution is something that God constantly squeezes out of us and deepens us in our faith. It's, I feel so happy now Father after I just alone when I find this space to only pray for this I think. Just thank you so much. Thank you.

Thank you. Let's go to Shhat. But no problem, I don't have anything to ask now. Blessings.

Oh, full of blessings. Bless you. Bless you. Let's go to Radish Sham Ji. Go on, brother.

Thank you, Ananta. Thank you.

Welcome, Father. Thank you. All my love. Love you so much. Love you so.