The Nature of Maya - 13th December 2023

You see, when I was younger, my parents wanted to take me to satsang—different type of satsang—and I never went. Hardly ever went. Very, very few times. Only when the main Guruji would come I would go, because the question always was: 'What's in it for me? Why should I go?' Now, this 'me' is actually just a made-up story; it has no actuality. The reality is Him. So when this first one sits on the chair, then the vision of the true one seems to get obscured. The famous example of a speck of dust blocking our true vision.

So when we are egoic, then to live in His light, to live in Atma Gyan, Atma Darshan, is far off. When we are simple, when we are innocent, then it is a possibility. Not only is it a possibility, it is a probability. It is highly probable. But what has happened in the world is that we are told that to come to this, the light of God's presence within ourselves, is for the very rare ones. We cannot find it. We are not worthy. It's only one in a million Mahayogi, Mahasadaka who is going to come to that, you see? But that is not true. Because if it can happen to a fool like me, that can happen to anyone. So if His grace can bless probably the worst spiritual sadaka in the world, then His grace can definitely bless all of you. But it must be, if not all that you want, but it must be the most important thing that you want.

So even our spirituality, which has been mostly about 'me' so far, the 'me' has to become about God. How is it about 'me'? Can we notice? You feel like, 'But you're talking about God, it's about God, we're praying to God.' You see, but what is the intention? Freedom for me, enlightenment for me, peace for me, wish fulfillment for me. And the more that we get, you see what happens? The sense of 'me', the idea of 'me', gets more and more elevated rather than reduced. So if it is true what Kabir Ji said, that the lane is too narrow—if there is 'me' there cannot be God; if there is God there cannot be 'me'—then we must return to a pure innocence of a newborn child.

So God is real is the main thing. He's a reality, not just a conceptual idea that we—it's not a feel-good notion. God is a reality. His presence is the Atma within, and it can be found. In fact, it must be found. That is when spirituality becomes about spirit, about spirituality. Atma is the spirit, the spirit of God. How to do it is to empty ourself of egotism, of specialness, of 'me-ness', of pride. Yes? Good so far? Still awake? That's good, that's good. That's much more than my kids ever get to.

So God is real. He's here. His presence is the Atma. It is a living being which must be found. I will go so far as to say that without the finding of the Atma within, we have not lived. That is life. To live in God's light is life. And all of what I'm saying is not for a few special rare ones, but it is universal. But you cannot fill up the chair with 'me, me, me' and expect God to sit there. For God, at least we can do that much, isn't it? We say 'Come' and then we say 'Me, but what about me? What about me? What about me?' God says, 'Okay, I'll wait till the chair is empty. You seem to be a bit busy right now.'

So the question should be, then: How do I remain empty for God? How do I keep the narrow lane free for Him? How do I make the chair for Him? What is the one, who is the one who invites the 'me' to sit on that chair? That makes the narrative, the story about 'me'? Who is that one? It's the mind. Because the mind is limited in nature, its mutterings or proposals or thoughts have central to them the idea of a person. You see, it is a sheer strangeness, you see? Because we may think that that idea is about this body, but if you really took yourself to be this body, why would you come to satsang driving five hours? There's nothing for the body here. Ground sitting, probably uncomfortable. If you really took yourself to be the body, you would not be upset about what someone told you. How does it affect the body? Whether a partner or sibling or manager at work or anyone—the body remains unaffected. They can say anything you want.

Who is the one that gets hurt? Who is the one that has a bank account and money in the bank and wants that to grow? Who is the one that even wants God? Where is this one? So we have two options. We can spend our entire life catering to this 'me' that we can't even find. The mind will quickly say, 'This me, this, this, this is a bunch of food.' In some sense, we all have that—that we are not a bunch of food. That much, I feel, is clear to everyone. The notion itself is quite strange. 'I'm more than just the food I eat.'

So either we can leave it uninvestigated and say, 'Oh, but everybody believes in this. Seven billion of us believe that they are this person. I will just go with that.' But there was a time in the world where a lot of silly notions were taken to be true. Just because an idea is popular doesn't make it true. So the second absurd thing I'm going to say is that there is no such 'me' or person. But I don't want you to just take my word for it, because then it'll become another belief. I don't want you to believe in what I'm saying.

What is the second option?

Come on. Okay, now I need to change. Experience it or have a direct insight about it. So if you look for the person, where can it be found? So the one that wants to understand the meaning of life, where is it? The one that wants to acquire more and more security, comfort, whatever we call it—where is it? So you may then say, 'But where is the God that you are speaking of?' You should challenge me like that, no? I'm saying that the 'me' is not there. Show me where it is. Look here, there, everywhere, inside, outside—there is no such 'me'. Then you should say, 'But you talked about God and His presence, Atma. I can't see that also. So what do I take to be true?'

You're going too fast. Yeah, I'm just saying the main things and then each of these—each point can be a full satsang on its own, of course. But these are the main—these are the highlights. So now we are stuck between two unperceivables. We can't perceive the person and we can't perceive God. So then some may say that then for God you have faith. But what they mean by faith is you must just blindly believe. Don't understand all of that. And this is the stuff that used to irritate me as a child. I didn't want to just blindly believe. But it is true that you need faith, and if I don't answer that question, remind me and I will explain that.

Me cannot be found. God cannot be found. Now it seems like just a question of belief. What do I believe in? So many will say, 'I am an atheist, I don't believe in God,' or 'I am religious, I'm spiritual, I believe in God.' You see, and these are the common positions that we take in the world. But what if reality was different? What if God could be found and you could recognize Him? Would that be good or not? It will break this conundrum of a choice about what to believe. You okay?

So see if you can pay attention to this part. Pay attention to this part because now it starts to get a little bit subtle. So now what we're saying is that God is not a question of belief, but the ego is. The 'me' is. So it is more absurd to believe the ego than to find God or to recognize God, which again sounds strange. I'm going to show you the way that you can come to God to find Him. But before I can tell you how, I have to tell you how not to.

Some of you studied Advaita Vedanta—most of you have. Now you're being humble and modest. What is the first rule of Vedanta? All that you perceive comes and goes, and that which comes and goes is not real. So how not to find God? Because God—we're showing you the reality of God, or we're coming to the reality of God—cannot be through perception. So perception is out. And that sounds like big trouble. If perception is out, then what do I have? But there are many things that we still take to be true that we don't perceive. Is this Earth moving or is it stationary? If somebody was to say that all of us are moving at rapid speeds right now—you know, I can see everybody is perfectly still. But those who buy into science, and I do as well when it comes to this physical realm, will say that yeah, this is not stationary. In fact, they will also tell you that that which we take to be the body—bodies are mostly space, more than 99% space.

Anyway, the point I'm making is that beyond this perception, we also believe or take to be true that which comes from a credible authority, and we believe just conceptually. But this also is not the way to God. So you cannot perceive and find Him because that would just make Him an object. You see, everything that you perceive is just objective in a phenomenal world. And you cannot just construct a thinking and say, 'Oh, I found God because I know the words Aham Brahmasmi and that is it, that is God.' No, that has to be an utterance after the darshan of God. So how not to do it? You can't do it through perception and you can't do it through conceptualization or thinking, meaning-making, sense-making. All that is out to find God. Now really the question which probably very...

Would just make him an object, you see? Everything that you perceive is just objective in a phenomenal world, and you cannot just construct a thinking and say, 'Oh, I found God because I know the words Aham Brahmasmi,' and that is it, that is God. No, that has to be an utterance after the meeting of God. So how not to do it? You can't do it through perception and you can't do it through conceptualization or thinking, meaning making sense, making—all that is out to find God. Now really, the question which probably very few have really considered is that: is there another way to recognize or come to knowledge which is beyond thinking and perception? Is there another way, you see? So this is the power of Maya, where the main source of knowledge, the main source of intelligence, has been kept aside, and this ability to perceive and the ability to think has become primary, see? And that's why God seems to be hidden and the world seems to be so apparent. With me so far? How not to do it: can't think about it and can't try to find him through as a sense object, as some sort of object.

Then what else do we have? Is this going to be one of those deals where you promised something big and then told it's impossible? 'I'll help you find God, but now we hit a dead end.' Is it like that, or is there some other way? Besides perception and thinking, is there a way to know things? And what we're talking about is something which is not a thing. So this is very important because even most in spirituality are trying to come to an experience of God, but they're looking for an experience of God again in a perceptual or objective way, like we used to read in Amar Chitra Katha or something like that. Not that there's something wrong with that kind of darshan, but I'm talking about another variety of meeting because—I'm being a little Vedantic to say—but if it is perceived and it came, then it will go. And everything that comes and goes is not ultimately real.

So not only am I saying that for the pursuit of God we must let go of our thinking and of our giving value to perception, or giving them the primary place in our life, I'm also saying that I'm introducing you to a new place where you must make it your home. You must live there. Don't just dip in, but live in the place which I'm going to try and show you. Okay, so through what instrument do we recognize love? You may say love is a feeling. Is it a feeling? So when the feeling comes, I recognize that I love this one, you see. But those of us who are parents have an advantage because we are not always feeling love for our children. Sometimes we are feeling anger, we are feeling frustration. Sometimes we are talking about this with another one: 'Why are they not studying? Why are they out so late at night? What is happening?' You see? So all this kind of frustration may be there, but we say—you go and ask that parent, 'Do you love your child?' 'Of course I do.' But you're not feeling any love; you're feeling anger at the moment. So where do you recognize this unconditional? It doesn't only have to be parent and child; I hope God blessed us with an opportunity to have unconditional love, at least that which we can recognize, for all of us in some way.

So you may not perceive the feeling and you may not just think, 'Oh, I love my children.' Where is it known? Can you find it now? So for those who are new to this kind of spirituality, love is a beautiful bridge. It's a beautiful bridge because it is not alien for anyone. A contemplation about whether 'me' is real or not may be alien. That God in his presence is a living being who lives within yourselves may seem too far out. But love is not alien to anyone. So where do you recognize this love? The heart. But the heart that we are going to speak of is the spiritual core, not the emotional heart. Because a lot of people in the world say, 'I'm not head, I am all heart,' you see? But that's not the heart I'm talking about. What they mean is, 'I just follow my emotions wherever they take me; I don't care about any rationality.' That's not at all what I'm saying. I'm pointing you to that which is the Satguru presence, the Holy Spirit, the Atma within.

And to recognize it, one of the ways to do it is to recognize: where do you know unconditional love? Is it just a thought? Is unconditional love just a notion, a belief? Isn't it? Is it necessarily a feeling that you're perceiving at the moment? No, it could be anger, frustration, irritation. We may feel that love for our Master, we may feel that love for God without knowing how did it get here. Does that mean there are times where we don't get irritated with our Master or with God? You get, you see. The feeling may be irritation or frustration, but in your heart you know. So this is the instrument—and actually it's much greater than, you shouldn't really call it an instrument—but this is a mode of knowledge which Maya has made invisible to us, obscure and abstract to us. And sensory knowledge and conceptual knowledge seems much more tangible, whereas in reality it is the other way around. All that is valuable is known here.

So in spirituality it is often said, but rarely met, where it is said that spirituality is moving from head to heart. I say, what is it? Sounds so lame. It's just like a Hallmark card or something like that: 'move from head to heart.' But actually it is one of the most important things. Often I tell you that if Krishna came and sat in front of you, in front of us—suppose he came and sat on the couch over there—then all of us would say, 'Ah yes, he is real. Oh thank you God, you came. Now can I talk to you? Can I ask you things? Can I just sit with you all the time? Please promise me that you'll never leave,' isn't it? And it doesn't—I mean, whatever expression of God that you resonate with: Ram, Krishna, Jesus, whatever word you want to use. But what does that convey? It still conveys that we give more value to that which is perceived on the outside than what can be found unperceivably on the inside.

So going from head to heart is actually that journey. And the highest intuitive insight we can have is about the nature of the Absolute, the Absolute reality, which in Vedanta we may call the Self, the capital S Self. So how many of us, firstly, would be willing to really give more value to what you're finding inwardly in your intuitive insight, in the light of the Satguru presence within, than what your senses are showing you or what your mind is telling you or what you think you've understood? Even in spirituality, those can become a barrier for God.

Can't you do a bit of both?

A bit of both will happen when you commit to doing only one, huh? You see, that is the nature of the human condition. A bit of both are going to happen when you commit to being only in God's light, in God's presence, that you commit to making your life about Atma. Then things will cause drama in our life, cause something in our life that will pull us back, keep pulling us back, and we may play this game of back and forth. Once you make the commitment of letting go of the false and coming to the truth, letting go of avidya, of ignorance, and coming to the light, you see, then a bit of both will happen. But if you want to do a bit of both, then this is not going to happen.

And I would plead with you and beg you and implore you to really consider what you're making your life about or who you're making your life about, because I promise you that God is a living reality. He's a living being. And the other thing to be careful about is that you won't say, 'Yes, but,' and you won't say, 'No, but.' You usually say, 'Yes, but,' and the 'but' is usually followed with 'tomorrow.' And unfortunately, everyone around you will also tell you tomorrow there's time for this. So although everybody taught everybody, actually living was the raga, that's the philosophy of the world. Parents will tell their children, 'Don't get into all this now, you'll spoil your life. When you're retired you'll have enough time. First do your...' What did Krishna say in the Gita? We know only one verse of the Gita and that is also a great misunderstanding of what we think we know about it, but it is the most often quoted verse: 'You must do your responsibilities, even Krishna had said do your karmas.' We will come to that, that's a full satsang also.

But I promise you that this Mahabharat, this battle, is about time. Every day will go like this: tomorrow, tomorrow, today I have something important. Yes, because we don't know if there's a tomorrow. We don't even know whether this is a dream or a waking. What if this is this dream you're having which is going to get over in ten minutes, you see? And but you have the opportunity to wake out of that dream into a reality of the highest. Do we know that this is not true? Is there a guarantee that we'll wake up tomorrow? And what is the alternative? Why should we postpone it? Should we keep living like zombies without having met Life till the last minute of our life? 'Okay, now I'm available fully for God.' So, okay, a weird example, but this is what's coming. Suppose you met a zombie and you had the antidote, huh? But the zombie would say, 'What's the rush? I'm fine.' You've seen that meme, no, of that character? Everything around him is burning but he is working on the computer or something. 'I'm fine, it's fine, it's fine.'

So either it is true what I'm saying, that a life without God's light—it is not, we haven't started living yet—or this is like a zombie life, you see? Or I'm exaggerating or just pushing a point or something like that. What do you feel it is? Sorry, but what do you feel it is? Before—look at your—am I exaggerating about this? Am I just—do I like scaring all of you and saying, 'No, no, your life is not truly a life if you take yourself to be just this bucket of meat and keep living like this, you must come to a true life'? I'm literally saying that the difference is between zombie and living. Do you feel like I'm exaggerating? Maybe your mind says, 'But that's too much.' But if there was a more stark example, tell me and I will use that there. Okay, so let's go first to Meera.

Yes, it has a quality, but it is after the strangeness of the nature of being. Now it will come to in terms of its—but you've heard this before—in terms of its phenomenal and non-phenomenal nature, I would say that the possibly the subtlest knowledge that we can have is the knowledge of love.

Yeah, yeah, but I'm saying then it's good that it brings you to the being, because to come to the source is the most important. But for those who feel that being is too farfetched, like 'How can I come to my Atma? I haven't even meditated,' but at least even they will be able to confirm the presence of love. It's tough to say more on love.

Yes, can you find it or no? Knowing, yes, but is it just a conceptual knowing? 'Oh, I'm a parent so I must love my kids and therefore...' Is it? No, it is not a conceptual knowing, it's an intuitive knowing.

Yeah, frustrated, irritated. What is Father saying? Exactly what I'm saying, exactly what I'm saying, exactly. So independent of the feeling which may be perceived at the moment, independent of the feeling which may be perceived at the moment, there's a deeper knowing of love. So what we're tasting is less compared to what it would be. What is translated in the phenomenal realm, yeah, is the—but it is also sweet to taste. But to meet the source itself is much more sublime in that way. Like when you said that after the being recognition, because it's a non-feeling feeling, just like being is a non-phenomenal and yet phenomenal being. Anyway, let's not scare everyone too much because actually, although I myself said that it's really not a feeling, but it's like a beyond-feeling feeling. Can we really take the feeling away from it completely? We can't. It's not a sheer intelligence, you know. So why I said also it is difficult is because heart knowledge—what we do in the heart to find the right words to express it—is not straightforward, and the heart itself has to provide the expression. Love.

Anyway, let's not scare everyone too much because actually, although I myself said that it's really not a feeling but it's like a beyond-feeling feeling, can we really take the feeling away from it completely? We can't. It's not a sheer intelligence, you see. So why I said also it is difficult is because heart knowledge—what we do in the heart to find the right words to express it—is not straightforward. And the heart itself has to provide the expression. Love, like a knowing, can't say. In these realms, you know, all these constructs start to fall apart because sometimes we may say like that, like that; sometimes we say like this, like this.

Yeah, that day you said God has so many names, you were telling, because it's not just love, it's justice. Let's look at that as a good example also, right? So even a little child, you know, five years old, when they lie—suppose they weren't even taught about it—they recognize that something is wrong, that they've done something wrong or something is wrong. Where is that intelligence from? That so-called moral compass which all of us have? We all recognize somewhere that violence is not good, to take from others is not good, that to be empty of kindness and compassion is not good. Where does that come from? And how is it universal? If it was just a product of teaching, then every culture teaches differently. But there are some things which are common across all cultures which are recognized to be good, even in tribes where so-called civilization has not reached.

Father, these are not like active qualities; these are more passive qualities which come actively into... you know what I'm saying?

Yes, I feel like what you're saying is that the knowing of morality, for example, what is right and what is wrong, is not necessarily only conditioned learning. In fact, the primary part of it is what we know because of God's presence. That is why it's absurd actually to deny His presence, because otherwise who teaches all humans to be good, to tell the truth, to not take from others, to not be unkind and empty of compassion? Where does it come from if there's not a universal intelligence which has this commonality? Is it just a set of rules that some committee decided? And the first humans gathered and said, 'Committee meeting: what should we be? We should be kind, we should not lie,' and then we just disperse it like that? It's not like that, you see.

So all that's why I was saying that all that is true and of value can only be known here. Like goodness—why is truth better than lies? Truth better than lies... who has made it that way? This is just that nature, no? It's just... but what is that nature? It's the qualities of our presence. Yeah, that is the nature of our being in a way. And that's why I always prefer this word, because when I was an atheist, then I would say, 'Okay, what is the intelligence which makes the plants grow? What is the intelligence which makes the birds fly?' All of that I would say is nature. But what is nature? There's no such thing as nature; it's just a word. We're talking about some universal intelligence. So because we don't like God, we like to say, 'Okay, that's nature doing it.' What do we mean by nature? You may be actually... what I am calling God, you may be calling nature. But we must be careful of just these catch-all words, no, which then give the illusion of understanding. 'There's no God, there's nature. Nature is doing all of this.' Then we stop our exploration, we stop our contemplation, because we just say, 'I know it's nature,' see? But what do you know about nature? What is this nature? Where is it? How does it operate?

So nature decided the speed of light, you see? The gravitational quotient, magnetism and how it works—all of these things nature decided. How did it decide? Is there a committee called nature? How did it decide the speed of light is going to be constant, this much? Who is this nature? So nature is just a nice replacement for God for atheists, because it is undeniable, the intelligence in the operation of even this perceivable realm. So this intelligence comes from where? It is the light we see. It is the light that lights up this world and we notice it. Bhagavan Ramana Maharshi had said: 'In whose light do you see the light of the sun? In the light of your being, in the light of the Atma.' Perception flows from being, attention flows from being. And all these discoveries we don't make because we are living in our head. And the worst thing we can probably do, and the slimiest trick of the mind possibly, is to allow you to think that you're living in the heart but you're just thinking that. That's an ambush if I ever saw one—to make even living in the heart, to live in the presence, in the life of the Holy Spirit, to make that a product of our thinking or understanding. It's a big trick.

Okay, so what have we explored now? We've explored that there's another mode of knowledge which most humans really don't access, at least in this way. But there the presence of God can be found, beyond perception, beyond thinking. This is the light of the Satguru. What is the meaning of Guru? Bringer of light. The bringer of light is Guru. But light there is enough in the world. What is this light? What light does he bring? He said, 'From darkness to light, from ignorance to truth,' the Guru light takes us. So this is the intuitive light, the light in which you can recognize that which is unperceivable. In every other light you recognize what is perceivable, but there's a special kind of light in which you recognize that which is unperceivable. He is here, His presence is here. And don't make yourself a visitor here. Live here, build your home here in your heart, in the true heart. Come what may, don't leave, see? And if you determine that, then it'll be... you'll... it'll be half and half, or bit and bit, a bit of this and a bit of that.

Yes, exactly. Yes, exactly, exactly. This is the place of wisdom, of true guidance, of peace, of joy, of love, of rest, of insight. And Maya's main job is to hide this, the treasure within. One of the most popular stories in spirituality is what? That diamond was already in your pocket, or you're sitting on the treasure chest begging for morsels of food. What is that diamond? What is the treasure chest? God's presence. How can it be found? By living in your heart. Is the heart a physical place that I'm talking about? It may seem like it; I also keep pointing like this. But no, it is the spiritual core, the core of intuitive insight, the core of the Atma in the sense that the word, the way we use it, determines that it is the spiritual core. Although the spirit is everywhere, but when we say heart, you see, stay in your heart. Although God is everywhere, presence is everywhere, and yet there's a... it's like there's a core that we can find. So Bhagavan Ramana Maharshi was asked this question. They said, 'Many say that presence, God, is everywhere, so what is the meaning of when you say heart?' He said, 'When it hits them, they will know.'

I don't know exactly words, I don't know exactly what I was pointing like yesterday. These situations, it's basically choose God, choose God again and again. But the experience in this again and again and again, and over and over, it's a moment of God and a moment of hell, and again and again. So at one point when you're tired, is not the surrender of it... it is a surrender of eating basically, because you just can't. So what then? Yes, this is again and again. I want to ask you one main thing: what is the offshoot and what is the main thing? Is your inside the main thing and the world a tiny offshoot, or is the world the main thing and your inside a tiny insight? Is the main thing and the perception of the world are just... and when it's like that, it's like that.

Yes, yes. So don't leave that, exactly. But exactly when... yes, what I... and when you determine not to leave that, then Maya will still grab you because it is powerful. So powerful, you cannot deny its power, you see. Because you... okay, now so many have said, 'Thank you, Father, we know how to be now, how to live now,' and next moment they get home, their partner says something, all gone. It's just like, 'How should I live my life? What's happening? I don't know if I'll ever be free,' all that, you see. And then you remember again, maybe some pointer comes from satsang or something pulls you back in and you're like... but if you said, for example, the other way where you said, 'Okay, now I figured it, one foot here, one foot there, both are equal, I will juggle this yin-yang, I will make this Ardhanarishvara living thing, I will juggle them,' then what happens? Then the outside becomes predominant without the deep inner commitment, deep inner intention to remain in God's light, come what may, you see. When we have that, then Maya still can pull us in, but if we don't have that, then we may visit this place as a visitor once in a while and reassure ourselves of our spirituality or God's presence, but it's not going to be a truly lived life.

But you see, I do, I ignore. I ignore it's like... I just ignore that and it's much better. And of course, it's just the insight is the more important. But there are cases like yesterday that is just... it's just so strong. And when you're broken so many times from this experience, I have this feeling that I have the experience of feeling God, being with God, and then the next moment I'm going to be in hell. And I got this shock over and over. So now... so now I want to tell you one...

Yes, I already... I'm there. I hear you coming, I hear you. I just want to give you one also, and maybe we had this conversation before. So you're right, you can live in God's light, everything seems to be fine, all is okay. So you may live in God's light, you may feel like, 'Wow, this is heaven.' The sages were right when they said heaven and hell are both here, it's how we live. You do that and then something... and that is the nature of this. Something will come, say, 'Okay, I'm not real, is it okay? Handle this. Come.' And then you see. So these events can come, things can come. And of course, what really pulls us out into all of this is the belief in the mind. But the strongest aspect of that belief is if we make a coherent story and a pattern out of it, you see. So it says, 'Oh, but it always happens like this, over and over it keeps happening.' We don't even know whether we've been alive for a minute or how many years we've lived, and yet the mind offers us these things, memory offers us these things. And when we say, 'This is the pattern of my life,' then that belief system seems to solidify even more.

Can you tell me whether this is a dream or waking right now? Could we be having this conversation in a dream? Yes, no? So when a dream starts—I don't know if you remember these things, but I notice these things—when a dream starts and somebody says... it could have just started and somebody says, 'Where are you coming from?' I say, 'I'm coming from my house.' 'How long have you been walking?' '15 minutes.' The dream just started! Nobody... I've never responded to my dream saying, 'So give me some time, my dream just started.' Has any of you done so? We have memory, we have the mind, we remember relationships, we remember families there, we remember the names of places, everything seems like this. So what makes that narrative untrue and this narrative true? You can't determine the nature of things in this way just because memory shows it, just because the mind says, 'This keeps happening to you.' We can't keep getting bullied by that. You have to take a strong stand for God in our heart, and still it'll catch you. I'm not expecting that it won't, but you're judging yourself much more harshly than I am.

Why? I am telling you, it will catch you. I got so upset yesterday, so upset, because when I look forward to coming here and I feel joy, and then something like this happens and it's... this is then tinted, tinted. This is then... I don't feel joy coming here.

This is your mind, no? This is the mind. It just says, 'Oh, now this is tinted.' This is like Rocky Balboa.

Wrong stand for God in our heart and still it'll catch you. I'm not expecting that it won't, but you're judging yourself much more harshly than I am. Why? I telling you it will catch you.

I got so upset yesterday, so upset because when I look forward to coming here, I feel joy. Yeah. And then something like this happens and it's—this is then tinted. This is then—I don't feel joy coming here.

This is your mind. No, this is the mind. It just says, 'Oh, now this is tinted.' This is like a Rocky Balboa knockout punch. Spoil the main thing which is of value to you by saying, 'Oh, see, this got tinted now.' So we've had a few retreats and Guruji has also shared with me that before there is a silent retreat, you see, and everybody is looking forward to coming, and the ones who are most looking forward to coming, something happens. See, we were so looking forward to going one time to Tiruvannamalai to be in a retreat with Guruji, and just the day we were going to travel, in the evening my son fell and broke his wrist in school on that day. So we're calling Guruji saying, 'What is this that has happened?' He's saying, 'Just come.' This is the twentieth call I'm getting today saying something has happened. My answer is: just come.

So this is the nature of Maya. It's not going to lie down and say, 'Come, you leave me.' I'm just going to—it's a jealous lover. It is going to grab you and going to say, 'No, no, you're mine. You can't leave me for God.' I'm so used to it and I know these tricks. It is just—it's but to know them. Ridiculous. Stop calling for them. Yes, recognize the artist is not—is to not give him money again. Yeah, exactly. It's so ridiculous. I told you it's ridiculous, but I am so—Kabir Ji said that Maya is a mahathag. See, Maya is the great con artist. This is the greatest con artist. So the greatest con artist means that you recognize that's the con artist, you determine you'll never give her money again, you see. But she is so tricky, she'll come in any form. 'Don't go to satsang today.' She may come in the form of a poor beggar, 'Please don't go to satsang today.' She is the biggest. Kabir Ji said in the—even in the devotion of the devotee she can hide. In the kamandal of Vishnu she can hide. This Maya, we have to not take her lightly. Okay, about this there's a bit of a queue forming. This is a way to bypass the queue now.

I think it's, you know, I just wanted to—the very—such a powerful example you gave about 'could this be a dream?' So in the dream, all objects are dream. Yes. So my dream body is the—is that, and everyone is the dream-like. And we can accept this easily. Exactly. That if I met five people in my dream, exactly, when I woke up none of them existed. They were all the virtual reality of my dream. So I guess what you're pointing us to is this isn't like Maya attached to this body; Maya is everything that you're perceiving through the senses.

Of course. So every circumstance feels painful if you attach yourself to the, you know, so-called observer for duality. But it's all part of the same Maya. Absolutely. So that's—I mean, this is actually something—it actually does blow your mind, you know? Like everything, like all the space is our own mind. Yes. Even because we've had these dreams since we were very young, we don't marvel at them as much as we should. Because what are we actually saying? They're saying, 'I went to sleep,' and in the sleep we say that the mind creates all of this with oceans and mountains and pain and pleasure and people and circumstances and events and even strange things that we don't see in the waking state. And we say, 'Ah, it was a dream.' That's the problem with labels. Just like nature, we just said 'dream' and 'I got it, it's a dream.' But what is it actually? What is that power within us which has the possibility to project so much immensity and even then can create a dream character in the middle of it which I call me? And I don't find it absurd until I wake up or I recognize that I'm dreaming.

So in the way, coming to satsang is to recognize, to wake out of the waking state, to notice that reality is not here. And the—I was calling this the periscope last time—your heart knowledge is the periscope which takes you to your higher reality. You want to ask more? Back, Father, please advise or correct this one.

So what I see in myself is when—when I'm in a mental state or in sort of Maya mode—yes, I like that—then the first thing of recognition that it is Maya mode is the thought: 'Is it that I am in a Maya?'

Right. No, it could—most likely the thought is not going to interrupt your Maya mode, you see. It has put a 'do not disturb' sign over there. Or it is saying—it's probably saying, you know, feeding you more like, 'Ah, what about this? You also have this to solve now that I have your attention. What about this thing? What about world peace? What about...' You know, so much is given to you to resolve. So you're not going to—most likely it is not going to remind you. Usually what happens is that we suffer and we start looking for those—at least with some experience—start looking at other places other than the mind. And something comes from the heart saying, 'Wake up, wake up.'

Father, my experience—is this correct? Guide me on that. It's like I can see that I'm not with being, but still I recognize that all this is my mind going on. And even that thought of potential of being with being is also peaceful. So like it's mind, mind, mind. Then you get a mental state of, 'Okay, you can be okay, this is all mine, forget it.' It's the mind is saying, 'It's all mine.' Yes. Okay. And still I'm not with being because being is totally different. It's like—it's like no words inside. And but that also gives me peace and then I stay there and then again go back to—so it's—it's all between mine only. It's not even going back to retreat. Stop it.

So, Father, another—yeah, because you're saying that, 'I know both my houses. I know the other house is better, but somewhere something tempts me to keep living in the first one.' And you realize that that one is the mahathag; she's the con artist. It can play, Father, in all directions. Of course it will. I'm saying it will. You see, what the problem I feel all of you have is the notion of perfection. 'It should not happen again.' I'm telling you it will happen again. That's why I said we will commit, you will fail, we will commit again, we will fail. But in the time that you commit and you haven't failed, that is the most beautiful. And even to fail and return is the most beautiful. Huh? It is a battle. It's the Mahabharat. It is—it is literally like the Mahabharat. You can read it on so many different levels, but the subtlest level is this battle. It is describing this battle that is the human condition. So to expect it not to be a battle when it is—no, that is—that is causing more problem in the battle. That is one of the arrows which hits you in the battle.

This kind of—I'm understanding this. Me, one who came to the end of the battle, who just came to the heart, who came to God's presence and never went to the head. Yes. When I had that experience, I also had understand here is no suffering. I felt it and I cannot even now—it must be true. Yeah. Suffering—your dream could have just started. But that is what was—I know this and we've spoken about this. You must forget about it. And then I live like that and then it's even worse.

Forget about it. So it is not helping you. And we've had this conversation for years now. You must forget about it. This is the danger of spiritual experiences. It's better I accept the battle. Yes. Is it to be in a battle for time with the mind? And to say there's no battle is not true. Then was kind of true. Now, no. There's no 'then.' Forget about 'then.' Okay. There is a danger of spiritual experiences, especially strong ones. If you—if you have awakening experiences, you see there's no me, no mind, everything is quiet, you're just sitting there, light everywhere, just beautiful. Then—and then nothing is working, mind is powerless. Maybe months go by. Then something comes: 'This is real, this is true, I have to be right about this, I have to know something here.' And we're back into me mode. Like he said, mind mode. What? Maya mode. So we're back there. This is the nature of everyone. Even the greatest sages on these walls have had these experiences. And to then the mind says, 'See, you lost it.' The con artist itself says, 'You got conned. Such a fool you are.' And says, 'You must want that again.' So who's winning? It keeps winning.

Did Arjun fight well after so much? And also the thing with Arjun is that although he fought after that, after hearing so much, um, he was not free even after hearing. He may not be the best example to—

Yeah, for example, I'm now in this kind of Vedantic thing. I don't even—I don't even—I honestly, I don't know. I spent years. So if you're in the Vedantic thing, what is the realm of perception? I don't even understand it anymore. It doesn't mean then you're not in the—it doesn't mean anything anymore. It just became some weird words. Make sure everything doesn't mean anything anymore, including past. You can't selectively—not selectively—remove meaning from things. If you're going to be empty, then remove meaning from all things, especially past. What is yesterday? Because in kind of in this Ramana teaching there is not a battle. It's—Ram Ji also big battle, Mahabharat also big battle. I think they're trying to tell us something in both stories. And they are the main stories of the country, historical stories where the protagonist is who? God's light. And the nemesis is who? The ego mind. They may be trying to tell us something. It does feel like a battle when the mind tempts us. It's got its claws out saying, 'Come, come, come, come, come.' It does feel like a battle. Stay still. And when we find ourselves that we are already trapped, then to return home seems like a battle. Yes, yes.

Sorry, he's been raising his hand. He's like—I know he doesn't know a word of Hindi. He recognized that it's not going to work like that. We're just politely asking. So I have to speak up now. So we're talking about this, the con artist, and I want to tell you about the con artist that's playing over here. Um, the way it says 'come,' it says—and it buys time. It's constantly buying time. 'Just do this one thing.' Yes, exactly. 'Take care of this.' Exactly. And it's almost—my question would be on this trip I made a really strong intention, yeah, to stand and—and not to fall forward because it attacks the body and the mind and the battle is very strong. My question, which you've answered in the past but I'll ask it again, is: will standing in presence, in God's light, take care of—like, can I trust to always be there and not have to take a personal position? Always. And it will take care of everything that needs to be taken care of?

Yes, for God's practical—more than we can ever understand. More than we can ever understand. Because why I'm saying that is because if we say, 'I leave it to you,' and there's a smell of like, you know, cheat code in that, saying, 'Okay, I went to God, now make this happen.' So then that would be a very convenient sort of spirituality. 'I want this to happen, I want my relationship like this, I want money like this, I want all of this like this.' This is what most people are doing anyway. But we then say, 'Okay, I'll leave it to God,' but we keep one eye open. 'Is it happening? Are you doing a good job?' You see? So we put ourselves in the master position and we've got God in servitude. So we should not avoid—we should not do that. We should avoid that. Once we hand over to him, that means that it's taken care of. We must never doubt that. But we must doubt our capacity to understand his ways. We have no capacity to understand what anything is for. Suppose I had a satsang, I was speaking, speaking, and all of you fell asleep. It was that boring. It was just absurd, academic, strange. Everybody went to sleep. Online also, everybody went to sleep. Here, too, sleep. I'm just talking, talking. But the only thing I would continue to check is: is it coming from the Satguru within? Is it coming from the heart? And if it is, then I am a servant to his will. So I have to trust that even if it's making all of you sleep, because I—

To understand what anything is. For suppose I had a satsang, I was speaking, speaking, and all of you fell asleep. It was that boring. It was just absurd, academic, strange. Everybody went to sleep online also; everybody went to sleep here too. I'm just talking, talking, but the only thing I would continue to check is: is it coming from the Satguru within? Is it coming from the heart? And if it is, then I am a servant to His will. So I have to trust that even if it's making all of you sleep, because I don't know what it is for. So maybe this recording goes somewhere and nobody watches it. Everybody secretly says Ananta's boring, never listens to it. And maybe you even label it somewhere and some file is there on Google Drive, and somebody like 10,000 years later comes across this strange folder. They don't know what satsang is, they don't know what any of this is, and they hear this strange man talking about these things, and that one comes to God's presence because of hearing that satsang.

So at what point can I determine the goodness or badness or whether it was the right thing to say or the wrong thing to say? I cannot. Here, I just have to trust it flows from God. So in the same way, when we hand over to God, then we must leave our capacity to judge, especially to judge Him. Because what are we saying? We are going to judge whether the one that is keeping this universe alive is all the light, and everything that is here comes from Him? We in our intellect will be able to say, 'Yes, I handed over and He did well' or 'It was all taken care of' according to what we think 'taken care of' means? We don't have that capacity. And that is where faith is also: to recognize that good means if it is coming from Him, you see? If it is coming from Him, it is good. That's it. Not what happened then, what was the outcome, how did my life turn out. You can't judge on that.

If the heart is speaking that something which infuriates all of you and all of my children leave, then too would I second guess and say, 'Oh, what did you make me say today?' This is to stand in God. It doesn't matter what outcome plays out because we cannot judge them anyway. See what I'm saying? So hand over to God and leave any judgment behind as well. Full trust. I promise you, He is the king of this universe. If you hand over to Him and things are not taken care of, then there is no option two anyway. You see, what is option two? First, His option is hand over to Him and everything is fine. Option two is, huh, struggle? Non-existent. No, but it's not. We started satsang by recognizing that the 'me' doesn't exist. So that is the play of Maya. There is no option.

She told me, and she's been in satsang with me for a long time, maybe nine years or something, she said one day something was just irritating, frustrating her. So she said, 'I don't know whether I'm cut out for God, you know? I'm cut out for this.' I said, 'Okay, you don't know whether you're cut out for this. What is option two?' And at least most of you who have been with me for some time will realize that we may have our frustrations and irritation, but what is option two? There is none. Option two is clearly false. It is clearly Maya. This is clearly—it is hell, it is death. That's it. But does that mean that just in a recognition of that, Maya runs out of tricks? She doesn't. Every day she has some new stuff. She has fresh material every day. She's not one of those stand-up artists who ran out of material years back. Every day something. You wake up in that wonder, no, what is going to happen? What's going to play?

Father, on that, I feel that the more time I spend with you, or at least this past few months, and it's even happening now, that like barriers to be able to hear you are coming so strongly. And that I don't—that happened in March. The first few years...

That means we're getting somewhere, huh? When would barriers come?

It's just happening. It's been happening a lot that I cannot hear you, or I get distracted with it. It's been happening at home, and I could see that it happened a few times here in the last week. And yeah, of course, the mind then brings conclusions about that. The one punch is the distraction, and the two punch is the guilt from the same one. The same one who distracts you says, 'See.' I don't know if it's—but it's similar to what the sister said about 'I don't know if I'm cut out for this.' And option two is just come to some mental understanding of spirituality, just use some techniques and find some peace, but no God anywhere inside. Like, is that worth it? Because God and truth are synonymous. Shiva, Atma, all same. True beauty, the true recognition of God, and the highest truth—all the same.

So at least for all of you who have been here for a while, been with me in some way for a while, I feel like at least you will not go back to 100% living a lie again. Okay, what is the trouble? Say again, what is happening?

It seems easier to get distracted.

Yes, yes. Because when it's under attack, it is bound to play up more. If it is not under attack, then why would it play up more and distract you more?

I find myself in those moments, I don't know, thinking maybe I can make an effort, but I can't make an effort. So it's very frustrating.

Yes. Once you decide or once you recognize you can't make an effort, then how can you be frustrated there? 'I can't make an effort. I have to be empty.' I can't try with my intuition. 'I try to be more intuitive.' Can you try to be more intuitive? You can't do it. It is effortless. So then how to be frustrated without effort? Be frustrated. Don't try. I want to see some frustration. It's not happening, right? All this—we have to try for God, we have to stop trying. This is the absurdity of all of it. For the false, we have to work hard. For the truth, we have to just stop. We have to commit to stop.

So you stopped. You're empty. God's presence is shining in your heart. Just love is coming for everyone. You may have days like this. It may go on for months. Then tting, tting, tting, something comes. The mind says, 'How dare they!' And you're like, 'How dare they!' In that one moment, it's gone. If you feel like you are the body-mind again, and something may come as a reminder like he's saying, the mind itself may say, 'But what happened to God?' 'No, no, all that can wait. I have to sort this out right now.' You see? Fix this. Because in that moment, it can feel so important to be right. And then hopefully, by God's grace, life slaps you around a bit and then you realize it's not so important to be right. Yeah. So that simple statement: 'Do you want to be happy or right?' All these sound like such head-to-heart, happy-right—they seem such simplistic, stupid, jingoistic type things, but there's great depth in all of that.

Exactly. Seems like the thing to do at the moment.

This is the battle. Mind looks for solutions. There are no solutions there. The one who can look for solutions can only grasp concepts, you see? The mind can ask big questions: 'What is the nature of reality? What is my purpose in life? What is God?' All of that. In return, what can it take? Just some words. It'll take some concept and store it in the memory. No value to any of that, except if those words then become pointers leading you to true insight. You see, the one solution—we used to say earlier that today's conclusions are tomorrow's confusions. So you may feel like, 'I got it. This is how it is. This is how it is.' You build a framework. Then life's job is to shake it and to break it. And soon it's broken, and then we return to confusion. 'But you said like that, like that, but I see like this, like this.' Like that, like that. Superglue it back together. Then after some time, again shaky, shaky. 'Is this how it is? Is that how it is?' And the Master says, 'This is how it is,' and 'That is how it is.' And then life shows you it's not how it is. Life is not boxable like that. You cannot template it. You cannot conceptualize it and say, 'This is how it is.' So sometimes the Master says, 'Go right, right, right.' Sometimes, 'Go left, left, left.' Which is the truth? Based on where you are. If the truth was always 'go right,' then we could have just codified it and said, 'This is how it is.' But it's not a conceptual way. It is just the way of the heart. Sometime like this, sometime like that.

What's the trouble without thinking? No trouble. But what is unresolved? Only if I go back tomorrow. And what is most attractive in the mind, I guess right now, it was about solutions. God. God is the solution. No matter what the ailment, God is the one solution. I told you about this—we were in Rishikesh and there comes a seller of these medicines, but he basically has one red pill. So basically, whatever ailment you have, he gives you that for 50 rupees or something. You take the red pill and have this, you'll be fine. So I'm like that one-trick pill: God, God, God, God. He finds us, huh? He finds us where we get lost. So I just try to use words which all are God, God, God, God, God, God, but hoping that you will hear them and find your way to Him.

So my question is about work. I spend most of my life working, and work makes me live in my mind, right? And every morning I try to sort of find that deep being within. So it feels like the con artist is calling me every day. And one way to break away from the con artist is—is it to just stop working then?

No, no, no. Well, could be, but we have to let His will guide even that. For many of us in our life situations and how it is playing out, it seems that work is a part of that life situation at the moment, including this one. So have you tried to remain in the no-mind even at work? Because something is making an equivalence between having to work and therefore being in the mind. So is your work—what kind of work is it? Very analytical or what is it?

It's quite analytical, and you keep building frameworks to explain what you're seeing. And so you're living in the mind and going deeper and deeper into that ditch of living in the mind. You're not really feeling and living in the heart.

I'm going to suggest one experiment to you. Do you have like a boss at work, or are you the boss?

I am, unfortunately, the boss.

You are the boss? So that's good. So it's easier to do this experiment. So I want you to just—like already so beautiful you said that you try to be empty and in your heart in God's presence early in the morning, and then as you go to work, then you switch over to the mind in some way. Try one day where you don't switch over and see what happens. See if all those frameworks fall apart or what happens. So I don't want to spoil it for you by presuming what is going to happen, but since you are the boss at work, at least one day you can risk and say, 'Okay, today, you see, I'm just going to remain like that. And if no work happens, the plants are upset, whatever, it's okay. Whatever. I'm risking it for one day.' So just remain empty at work. See if words stop, you become vegetative, what happens? And I'm happy to hear from you on whichever medium, WhatsApp, whatever. You can tell me that, 'I tried doing this. I started the day with God, I started the day in my heart, and I made the strong intention, a strong determination not to leave. And most of my day I spent like that, although there were some moments where I got caught up in something, some meeting happened, somebody called, so I went back to the mind, but I kept returning to the heart.' And just let's see how it unfolds. Right? Thank you.

Even in spirituality, even in satsang, we employ some constructs, some frameworks. But do we have to refer to our mind for that, or can it flow from the heart itself? I would go as far as to say that all of you come, and whether you recognize it or not, the reason why you come is to meet someone who is allowing himself to be an instrument of his heart. And if these words can be spoken, if this kind of work can happen, then what is it that we cannot trust God to do? Having said that, you must remember what we were talking, both of us earlier, where you must remove the judge also to say, 'Oh, this worked out.'

Does it flow from the mind for that, or can it flow from the heart itself? I would go as far as to say that all of you come, and whether you recognize it or not, the reason why you come is to meet someone who is allowing himself to be an instrument of his heart. And if these words can be spoken, if this kind of work can happen, then what is it that we cannot trust God to do? Having said that, you must remember what we were talking about, both of us earlier, where you must remove the judge also to say, 'Oh, this worked out well' or 'This didn't work out well.' Just one day, whatever happens, just let it unfold. And then at the end of the day, if you have a report like, 'Okay, it was fine' or 'No, it was not fine,' that's okay. That's not bad. It's not bad. They've mostly been able to hear what I'm saying. It's rare for the first time. Something, yeah, there's the microphone.

Father, you know, I've been coming for quite a few years now and I would say being quite earnest about the whole process. I would say, you know, it's really starting to feel like, in a way, like we're actually in a kind of metaverse. It feels like, you know, the sensations of the body, you feel like they're placed there. And sometimes they're there, sometimes they disappear. You know, like, for example, in meditation sessions or just on waking up, basically between the dream. So then, honestly, the only thing I have to say is, you know, the ability to ascribe truth value and be motivated by identity, it actually fades really quickly. I mean, I was just reflecting on your beautiful question about how to do at work. Sometimes I'm like, 'What's work?' You know? I mean, honestly, it's really like, what is do? What is what? I mean, what do you do? Honestly, sometimes if you're feeling like you're in space and these bodies are appearing in you, and you sort of know that even it appears and disappears, then I'm just, you know, to your point about, yeah, you can let things flow, but sometimes you just want to erase it all. And then when I do, I do read Bhagwan for God, this habit of reading 'Who Am I?' every day, just a short book. And one thing that hit me very, very hard was Bhagwan's—you know, he says that—I wanted to make a joke.

Yeah, please, please.

Reading 'Who Am I?', something hit me really hard, so I was going to say, 'Who? Who?' No, exactly. That's true. So, you know, he says you can't—when the Self is shining, you know, the world will not appear. And whatever he says, you can't take them both to be, which is the same thing you say: you can't even give truth value to the substratum and the appearance at the same time. So, I just would love to hear your guidance because if our ultimate true nature is to, you know, reject the world so that we shine as the Self, then should we actually be trying to kind of go with the flow, or should we actually reject it as unreal without taking a position?

So, from what I'm saying, I don't see a distinction between the two because you're not going to create a new category in the head saying 'unreal, unreal, unreal.' And to be empty of those either categories of real and unreal is like what you would say going with the flow. But not how the world says go with the flow, just flow with your emotions or something like that. What you're saying is really to live in the unborn, live in the no-mind, and to operate from there.

Some of you I have known for many years, some of you are new here, but I know that each of you has a life which has a different texture. It has different conditions, and yet the universality of God's presence is independent of all those conditions. So none of you must ever believe that, 'Oh, my circumstances are special or difficult,' or 'I have some challenges which others don't have.' The mind gives everyone its max attempt. It's not trying halfway with you and trying full way with you. But I know the nature of the mind is to tell you, 'But your situation is especially difficult. You have more challenges. That's why it is difficult for you to do this right now.' It's not true. So with wholehearted feeling, with full-hearted intention, find God in your heart and don't leave Him.

This keep—which I'm not remembering the word—one is of course, which is that 'I've attached myself to you and now I'm not leaving you for anything in the world.' That's a beautiful one. There's another one also which I can't remember, like, 'Whether you like it or not, you're stuck with me, God. You cannot shake me off.' I'm way—yeah, that's one. There's one from Swami Ravidas Ji himself. Both are from him. Like something like a fish and—I don't know, they use various metaphors—but just hang on to Him, His feet, for dear life. That's what I'm trying to say, that don't feel like your thing is especially more challenging. That's just a trick from the mind. God is here or no? How does it matter what happened in the past? If He was sitting in front of you, would you be thinking about what happened in your past? Stop it.

Yeah, well, the mind has an ability to regularize, normalize everything. So who knows, if Sri Krishna, the Lord Himself, started coming to satsang, you see, after a few days we may be like, 'Hmph, but I have some meeting.' I don't want anymore. I don't want to love anymore, but I cannot because if I don't love what is—don't take any position. Forget the meaning of everything. Love, not love, okay, can't, free, not free. Forget. Forget doesn't mean you'll lose your vocabulary, you see. It's just that they become so light.

And so, suppose there was like one child told me—no, I won't embarrass her by pointing at her—she said that, 'Father,' and she was only twenty-three when she started coming to satsang, so she said, 'I just wanted to come to satsang and hear the satsang.' Many years later she told me actually there was a very handsome boy that she used to come and want to see. So she wasn't hearing anything I was saying; she was just looking at that boy. So she used to come like that. But suppose that that is the situation, and then that boy continues to be there, but one day God Himself came in the form that you want to see Him the most. You know, in an instant that boy would be forgotten.

So in the same way, what I'm pointing you all to is a real fact, a living being, the living being Him, He Himself, the Lord of this universe. His presence is within yourself. He's here. Where is the time to think about anything else and resolve other things? And He's here in a form which is deeper than if He were appearing in a prakrit way to you, if He were sitting on a sofa in front of you or something like that. Your relationship with Him right now is deeper than that, more intimate than that. Don't make Him just an object. Don't wait for objective experiences. You're finding Him in your heart, all of you are. So where is the time for other things? We were infatuated with a 'me,' but now He's here. How can we still be infatuated with the 'me' when the true Beloved is in front of us, more intimate than in front of us?

Only something must still be creating a level of unreality about what I'm saying. He must be still saying, 'Yeah, but not Him.' Because if you admitted that He, the One, is here, then where is the time to think about other things? You see? And what's the reason to? You meditated for fifty years and had great experiences, all of that, but one day God Himself came to you. Would you still say, 'Okay, but I meditated fifty years, what about that?' What else do you want? He's here. 'No, but what about that? In my third chakra there was a minor vibration on the third of July.' But God is here. So I don't know if we can notice that level. It's not like a disbelief, but a lack of faith somewhere that creeps in. It tries to normalize everything that is being said in satsang and makes it like, 'Yeah, it's true, God is here, but then still...'

How is it possible to say 'but then still' if 'God is here' is true? You see, this is the nature of Maya. It inserts itself in even the highest insight with that simple-sounding 'but then' and invalidates everything before that. Where is the room for self-concern if He is here? 'God is here, but what about me?' What about you? He is here. 'But will I be able to stay with Him tomorrow?' Who cares? He's here right now. This is the meaning of faith: to take your intuitive insight to be higher than any perceptual experience. That is really important. If you keep bringing the narrative back to 'me, me, me,' then where is the room for God? You will not be the first one to fit 'me' and God in this narrow lane. None of you will be. Whatever you nurture will become more and more what plays out. If you nurture 'me,' then 'me' will play out more. If you nurture God, then God's presence will be more and more palpable.

And you cannot juggle both. If you make it 'God for me' so that 'my life is like this, my life is better,' that's not about God at all. Then it is still about 'me.' Change the central protagonist of your life from 'me' to God. Make everything about Him. Even, especially, when it feels difficult, it is your intention that counts. Your mind may say, 'You made a complete mess of it. You said I believe in God but you were full of ego.' But at least you started off on the right foot. Don't let your failures dishearten you. They are not failures as long as you carried the right intention in your heart. And to overcome Maya completely is not going to be child's play. You manage, manage, manage, manage, and she will have a knockout punch somewhere. But stand back up. Come back to God.

So although the insight is instant and absolute in that moment, in the flow called life it is not like that because of the potency of Maya itself. That's why I say that no matter how high the sage, there is always the little bit of the 'me' who remains, and that 'me' must drown itself in bhakti, in devotion and servitude, in deep love for God. Yes, but how is that nurtured? Thought by thought, isn't it? So start with one thought right now. What am I really paying attention to? That's the only way to do it. If there was some magic pill like the seller in Manikarnika, you could remain open and empty forever. I could have, I would have given you that. But the antidote is just moment by moment, thought by thought. You will succeed. You will live in His presence, and there will be moments where you will fail. It's all right. You see, you cannot cure self-concern with more self-concern. 'I'm so deeply in self-concern'—that's even more self-concern, isn't it?

You can turn this—too much heat in the room already. Moment to moment, thought by thought, empty. Use every tool I've given you. Now so many tools. Hold on to your presence, hold on to your inquiry, hold on to your arrow prayer, hold on to the ADS prayer, hold on to any name of God, anything. So much that you can use to remain empty. But you must have—all of us must have honesty with ourselves. With ourselves we must be honest. And if you realize that, 'Okay, now without a tool, without a crutch, my mind keeps troubling me,' then we must not be arrogant and say, 'But I can just remain open and empty, why do I need anything?' Then say, 'Ram, Ram, Ram, Ram.' We must leave all pride and, like a helpless child, we must approach Him the way He will appear to us.

Suppose you feel like, 'I can just be anchored in the presence, I don't need anything,' and you try it for a few days and you notice that your mind keeps getting you. Then there's no harm to chant a few mala, do the ADS in the morning, stabilize yourself in His presence. It is not winning. You're not going to get a certificate for going straight to the unborn or something like that. 'I'm so special, I went straight where so many sages had to do so much sadhana.' Anything that helps you be with Him, use it. Use your breaths, use remembering Him, chant His name, do the prayer, meditate, sing devotional songs, do your whatever sadhana you want, inquiry, invitation.

There's no harm to chant a few Mala, do the ads in the morning, stabilize yourself in his presence. It is not winning; you're not going to get a certificate for going straight to the Unborn or something like that. 'I'm so special, I went straight where so many sages had to do so much sadhana.' Anything that helps you be with him, use it. Use your breaths, use remembering him, chant his name, do the prayer, meditate, sing devotional songs, do your whatever sadhana you want—inquiry, invitation—so much is available to you.

And that makes it more difficult because so much is available. It makes it more difficult because then, if a student would go to the monastery, there was no Google, no? That was the only option. So in all those villages, you would go to that one Master who ran that monastery. So then he would give you a koan. So if he said you have to look at that wall and just ask yourself, 'What is this?' yes, that is your practice. 'I'm not giving you any other instruction till you can give me a good answer to what is this.' That's it. Then it was difficult but easy also, no? Because you're not saying, 'Oh, I'm not really liking this, what else can I do?' You see this kind of stuff. You have to trust; there is no option. Stay with that.

Then we also keep switching this, that, this, that. But as long as that, if that switching is happening from your heart—but don't fool yourself about these things—then it's fine. Just commit to find him and to spend your entire life in his presence, then the ways will all reveal themselves. And I'm not letting any of you leave this world without finding him as long as you keep coming to Satsang. I can't force you to come. Okay, I feel we are good for today.