The Mind Is a Position Machine - 15th November 2017

Clarify something. It seems like, let's say, why do I believe my boss here? That is why on Facebook I guess I'm the chair of this today. You know, these repeating thought patterns which get belief and principle. It's a psychological suffering with me. I can see that. I know it has definite association with my leg muscles, so I get leg cramps at the end of the day. And this is for so many years. It's like without doing anything, at the end of the day you get heavy and take cramps. And these repetitive patterns in the mind—many times I realize that they are just, you know, four or five types. And it's like I am suffering from the same and same for many of them, same for me and again. And sometimes I think like, 'Boy, how many times have I thought about this?' But still, it's like I get into them. And sometimes I question, I try to make, 'Well, why is it that I believe this so many times?' I go and I get an answer with that because there is an idea I realize you are in, then there is suffering. Thank you. It feels very sad. So it's like many times, sometimes we can do inquiry and many events it happens when I try to be free from that suffering. If you resist suffering, it gets you into the same field. Nothing seems to... I want to ask that, is it that my recognition is not very strong? Like you have powerful recognition. Why is this and why still I'm steamed by that?

The problem is this concept, this notion. And you're absolutely right that the way to some of the most powerful ways to get over this suffering because of these notions, as has been suggested by the sages, is to either surrender or to inquire. Now you say that 'I inquire and I ask myself why.' Now you have to change one letter in that inquiry. Instead of W-H-Y, change it to W-H-O. Because the mind loves 'why.' Why does it love 'why'? Because there is no 'why.' And this is where you will get the most resistance from the mind. 'Why are we here?' There is no mind. 'What is the purpose of this?' There is none. 'What does it all mean?' Nothing. It seems like that is the worst news to the mind. That is the worst. This makes you feel meaningless. So it loves playing with this question 'why.' Inquiry means—the fun thing is that as you ask 'who' and you come to this seeing clearly more and more, then the question 'why' will not have a verbal response, will not have a conceptual answer, but you will know why. I will try to explain it as if it's play or as if it is trying to experience yourself as something new—all these answers—but you know that none of these are the answers. So you will not know it conceptually. So then the mind will come and say, 'See, now I am inquiring but even inquiry is not working. The inquiry is wrong or is not fruitful.' Let's put it like this: 'why' has no real answer in science, in philosophy, in religion. Everybody's grappling with the question 'why.' Find out 'who' first. Why? For who? 'Why is it happening to me?' Find out 'who' me. That is the need to do the inquiry.

Now some of you get tired of it. You think, 'I don't want to do inquiry, Father. I'm tired of it.' That is fine too. Let's find the new letter 'T'—my problem. You want to keep it your problem also, and then you want to presume that inquiry is something else and do it your way. Then it's a struggle. Or if you inquire now and not even for the personal benefit, not even with an expectation—isn't it relevant that we know who we are even if we didn't get anything because of it? Isn't it so tasty? It has been made into such a major question, but wouldn't it be relevant to know who you are even if you didn't get any benefit out of it? As you're presuming yourself to be something and I am telling you that it is not true, isn't it worth exploring at least a little? It is a belief, a movement, and I can see that. Then we can have an interactive seeing. And that which sees that in the... so this 'I'...

Suffering. Now this might be the problem because you might feel like there's a 'me' who is suffering and then this 'I' comes and replaces the suffering for the 'me.' Now this is what I'm trying to show you: that the 'I' which you are—there are not two of you. There's one 'I' that you are. Now without the presumption of the 'me,' there is no suffering. And every time there is a presumption of the 'me,' it is bound to be followed by suffering. So although the initial motivation might seem like it is for the 'me' to get rid of the suffering that I am doing the self-inquiry, what do you find when you do the self-inquiry? You see that the 'me' doesn't exist.

This is what I'm trying to show you: that the 'I' which you are—there are not two of you. There's one 'I' that you are. Now, without the presumption of the 'me', there is no suffering. And every time there is a presumption of the 'me', it is bound to be followed by suffering. So, although the initial motivation might seem like it is for the 'me' to get rid of the suffering that I am doing the self-inquiry, what do you find when you do the self-inquiry? You see that the 'me' doesn't escape the self-inquiry. There is no 'me' left to suffer or not suffer. Psychology says the one who starts the inquiry is finished by the inquiry. But many times what happens is that you take it deep, like you take a dip in the Ganga. You dip in, and then you dip out. 'Oh, me is back!' And this is because you start believing you are Brad Pitt in this body. Even when you give a belief to the mind, that becomes easy now.

Now, why are we trying to solve this problem for Brad Pitt if he never really existed? Of course, he exists phenomenally somewhere else, but you are not that. This one is the ludicrousness: yourself behaving as if you are Brad Pitt. It is, in fact, more, because at least with him you might have some clear idea of what he is like, where he is. But with 'me', he is just, you know, not the body. We read about freedom, about the world wanting to be free from suffering. Where is even the picture of that one? Where is this 'me'? Just a belief system, isn't it? It is a very slippery sort of a belief system which is always changing the target. Sometimes it only wants freedom; sometimes it only wants freedom from something else; sometimes it only wants a good relationship; sometimes it only wants money. Where is this one?

It's in the heart. I mean, it's just in the thinking, isn't it? If you take it out, maybe it's a prototype.

Yes, so you say it is in the thinking. But thinking is gone. Then you say it is in the future, and I think again this is how it is. I'm saying thinking is gone right now; you are free. Then the thinking itself will come and say, 'But what about when I come back?' But again, it is gone. Our natural state is that in which identity is gone. We have this misconceived notion that we are living as the identity. Actually, identity just comes and goes. It might come and go many times, so it feels like it is a constant for you. But our constant experience is that of being free. Actually, right now, your experience is that of being free. Right now. No? Now, one thought will come and you might pick up some identity for a few moments; then it would go. So predominantly, even in the phenomenal plane, most of humanity actually is free.

That's exactly why I asked the question, and I can see clearly. Why do I believe thoughts?

This 'why' we've answered many times, and you know the answer, so I'm not indulging in that question. Because you know that as long as consciousness wants to play as an individual entity with its individuality, it will continue to. But the more important thing is that even though this belief might come, even though the pretend suffering might play out, what is really happening to you? Has anything ever really happened to you? Has there ever been one who has actually suffered? Has there really been a sufferer that we saw? Is the pretend one the one who suffers? But they haven't seen there is no sufferer. It cannot land. We see suffering, so we cannot touch that this one, when you see that there is no sufferer ever, then actually what is suffering? So it is only the presumed sufferer which forms the landing strip for the suffering.

Why do I believe thoughts? Because consciousness is choosing to suffer with this question right now. If this was not there right now, what is your state?

You see, sometimes even in this suffering, even in these very inquiries, there is a looking 'I'. When you are asking 'Why do I believe thoughts?', are you asking why the self in its dynamic form is believing thoughts? The self is doing what consciousness is doing. But I know that mostly when this question is asked, it is mostly like, 'Am I the individual? Why am I, this body-mind, still believing?' You are not. You do not exist. You don't have the power of belief. Who is the 'I' even in this question? Is the inquiry the same as the presumed one? Exactly.

This is how the mind will use even the things that you hear in satsang and try to use that as an ally for its individuality. What I often say—'Don't believe your next thought'—is not a personal strategy. Because if you try to make it a personal strategy as an antidote for suffering, then the mind will come up with these kind of questions: 'You know that to be free from suffering you just have to drop your belief, but look at you, you just keep believing all the time.' It is telling you the story of the presumed self. Even 'Don't believe your next thought' relies on your seeing that which you say 'I can see it here'. It is reliant on that 'I' playing as consciousness, not that small 'I' which is playing as the individual. There is no pointing here for that presumed one, because that itself is the root of all suffering. It will take whatever you hear in satsang and use it for its own means.

This is consciousness reminding consciousness. Now, if you say 'Why?', but it is consciousness reminding consciousness. There is no 'why'. This is part of the play: consciousness reminding consciousness that it is not that limited one, it is not the presumed one. And this is naturally what is in this moment. The mind will convince you first to pick up the mask of the 'me' and then say, 'Now solve it for me.' That is why inquiry is to see where this 'I' is pointing and where the masked one is pretending to want to get rid of suffering. The mask itself is suffering. The mask of the 'me' is the mask of suffering, and then wearing that mask, it tries to play the game of getting rid of suffering. There is nothing for this 'I' to do; there is nothing for this masked one to do. But I am reminding myself as consciousness: there is time that we are done with this once.

Inquire now for the sake of the truth. Don't even inquire for any psychological benefit, any physical benefit, because that expectation itself will keep that presumed 'me' on your back. You see that 'my depression should go', 'something should happen'—that will keep you strapped into the 'me'. As I asked you the question: is it worth it to find out who I really am even if there was no benefit? I think I remember the first time you came to satsang, those two days. The first time we spoke like this, it was very simple and clear. Anyway, so then I said, yes, awakening is a facepalm moment. It's just something I've been believing about myself; I've always only been this. It's a big facepalm moment, you see. Let's say you don't know whether to laugh or cry, right? But why was this laughter and crying happening? It was like, 'This was it? It was always this?' What that continues to do is truth. It's just that the momentum, the power of this conditioning, the play that is so beautifully designed by this consciousness can seem to still get our belief.

That's why I feel like yesterday's satsang—I don't know whether you watched that—it's very useful because it clearly outlines all of this: the seeming human condition and also what has been prescribed to come to this recognition and to be free from the idea of 'I am something'. I hardly ever recommend like, 'Okay, everyone should watch that' or something, but I have to say about yesterday, I feel like truth was rising from here which was coming with a lot of clarity. Okay, last question from Jyoti.

You know, when I'm in this treatment and it really can be very painful, I was hearing the satsang while I was going there. When the attack became really intense, the question was not 'Why am I having this?' but 'Who is this suffering one?' And you know, when I just wanted to clarify how I was doing the inquiry—because I mean, there's pain and it's tangibly there—so when I asked 'Who?', I kept silent just to see. And it shifts from here, there, and everywhere. And then finally it was really funny. This 'me', the suffering 'me', seemed to be like it's my throat. Because when I looked at the pain, is it my leg which is saying it's suffering? No. Is it my head which is saying no? What I was doing, it seemed that it was like 'me'—this could be that or X number of things—'I should be well' and 'this inquiry should cure me from this suffering'. And you know, it became so apparent that I can't say that the pain went away, but the experience of it was much less. But it suddenly just revealed that it was still the 'I', the 'me' who wanted to use this inquiry to release. You know, that just became this drama. But having said all this, Father, I mean, it really is difficult to keep on, you know, when the sensation comes, to suddenly want to inquire or something. And it's really tiring. Yeah, so I'm just trying to really surrender this because it seems absurd to want to play such a game where you just keep hurting yourself. I don't know who's saying this—it sounds like the 'me'—but I'm tired.

See, how to come to the surrender has been what we've been talking about the last few days. To be surrendered means to have no idea about anything. Now, of course, when pain is there, the pain is experienced, and you check to see who is suffering from this pain. But whatever the objective experience might be, inquiry means to look at what witnesses that. So whether it is an energetic sensation in the throat or if it is a concept of something, to inquire means to find what witnesses that, what is preceding whatever the content of the experience might be. Whatever the content of the experience. The problem is that when we inquire with the expectation, then there's always this monkey on our back which is saying, 'Is the symptom going away? Is the sensation going away? Am I feeling better?' And so today I've been saying that just inquire for the truth. Inquire for the truth. It is worth it independent of any other benefit.

And as you make no conclusion, does inquiry become so open that no conclusion is forming about anything? Then you will see that surrender and inquiry are actually one. Because you will never find an 'I' which you can see and say, 'That is me.' No notion will ever live up to your discovery of yourself. You will say, 'There is no me, I can't find it.' I mean, these things you will say. You never will be able to point in any direction and say, 'That is me.' And yet it is your very own discovery. This is the beauty of this. So many get frustrated because 'I've been looking for this for so long, I just don't find it. How many satsangs does it take? How much inquiry does it take?' Because it can feel like one day I will find the 'I' as if it is an experience. No. But the truth is much more obvious than that, simpler than that, but cannot be painted in a concept, cannot be described in a concept. And yet it is your reality.

As we remain empty of any concept and notion about everything, then that is surrender and inquiry. The fruit of the inquiry is apparent, and there is never a sufferer, there is never some doer of anything. Unless there is a notion actually present, then actually even the terms... I really will say something like, at this point even the terms 'inquiry' and 'surrender' will become meaningless. They will just be used when the Guru pushes them in your mouth to share with others. All concepts like body, world, universe, God, consciousness, awareness—they don't point to anything at all. Things get intense. I'm telling you: be empty of notions. Then I begin. Please do some magic. Although he keeps acting, keeps trying to do with this body.

Really, we will say something like, but at this point even the terms inquiry and surrender will become meaningless. They will just be used when the Guru puts them in your mouth to share with others. All concepts like body, world, universe, God, consciousness, awareness—they don't point to anything at all.

Things get intense, I'm telling you. Empty of all notions. Then I begin, 'Please do some magic.' They do a media and a little also, although he keeps acting, keeps typing to do with this body. Thank you all so much for being in satsang today. Satguru Sri Mooji Baba ki Jai! Love you all. Nice to see you, or not see you. What? See, I missed one. Yes, yes.

But from chanting, chanting something... or was she joking a bit? I'm thinking, are you joking about the case? But right in the beginning, no, he posted something about Dada. You know, I'm half-changed, but there is a slight doubt. There's a doubt, and because I'm so dependent on everyone. But it's okay, I lay it all at your feet.

Everything that you see just spits out whatever. It's all there, no? It's no problem. Thank you.