Helpless in Ourselves, Confident in God - 14th January 2026

I'm getting all these strange examples these days, but so if the Antahkarana was a thali, was a plate, you see, it's got many elements. It's got body's sensations. It's got thought movement. It's got emotional things. All the sensations of pain and pleasure, then emotional pain and pleasure. All of these things are offered on the thali for God, on the plate for God. But the love in our heart is the mango pickle, or whatever is attractive to you. If it is the dessert or the sweet dish, then that is the love in our heart. So when we offer ourselves to Him with full love in our hearts, then I don't feel He knows how to turn away from that. You see, of course, everything is ultimately His grace and He cannot be forced. But if there was a way to force Him, probably this is the only way that comes close to forcing: just offer yourself as a plate, an empty plate to God, just with that one bite of your heart which is available to Him.

This plate is probably the only plate which is best offered empty, except that pickle in it. If we are too full of ourselves, then it seems more difficult for God to take over. So coming to Satsang is an attempt at a takeover from me to God. So how to attract that One to buy me out? Yes, the love is most attractive. But if I say—exactly, see, exactly, this is exactly what I want to show. If we offer ourselves like this, no, the minute He comes close, we're like—you see, then you know what she did? You didn't see on Zoom, but she said, "Okay, now tell me, are you really giving it to me or not?" You see, so in a way, this is our relationship with God also. "I surrender fully, fully. Do what You want with me," you see, and then something starts to shake in our life. "No, no, no, not that, not that! I take it back, I take it back!" So we surrender and we take it back. Yes. What is to be surrendered? Our full everything. Our full insides, outsides, everything.

If it's too warm, you can put on—I don't know what to say, but I want to say heart is like—I feel like what you said, it feels like how I am somewhere with you, you know. I feel like I say all these things and I even feel all these things and I want to surrender fully, you know. It's easy when I'm not in Satsang, or many times of course over here also, but something comes here when I feel like here is like rubber hitting the road and something like the ego is so threatened. I can see it now. I know it's not me. I know that somewhere now. Even though I don't know it clearly, but I have a sense now that it's not about me. It's that which has to die here which gets so—like it's completely out of move. So it just goes like—it goes full throttle basically. And like you would say that it's like a guerrilla warfare. And that's how I'm experiencing it and I don't know what to do about it. I also shared with you that day. I just want to come up and I don't even know what to say or I know—I don't know, Father.

Very good. So in what way do you notice that it is not the original you? It is the trickster mind. In what way do you notice that?

Because I notice it in different ways at different points. So sometimes I can speak now fresh. I feel like I know I belong when I say God's name. I know I belong there. And I feel Her presence so much and I feel Her reciprocation of love and I feel like it's like an—it fills me and I know I'm fully empty of thought, empty of everything that time. But so now today it was like that, that I also can connect to the name deeply and I also see this someone like banging on the door, like wanting to enter, you know, like loudly coming up with—

In what way?

Thoughts.

Like you see in thoughts, right?

In thoughts like, and also sensations in the body, Father. It's like a—

Reduce this a bit, the volume.

It's like a learned response in the body also. Take—okay, it's very loud still. So I notice it in thoughts and I feel it like sensations also, something that—these things are happening, okay. These are—

Okay, there's a lot of feedback coming. Should I put it off? We'll try one last.

And it's like a set of thoughts and set of sensations together, like that's been labeled as the Satsang experience in the head. And I want to get rid of it, Father. I'm not going to go in it now. Whatever it takes. And you told me the ways to be a fool, no? So I don't have anything smart to say. Yeah. Yes.

So the messaging is usually around: how am I going to be perceived? You see, what will people think of me? I don't want to be laughed at. I don't want to look foolish.

All that is secondary. Okay, I don't have so much like what will people think of me. It's there, but it's secondary, Father. It's with you. It's how you will see me and—and it's not that simple, Father. It says that—so it's made like a narrative, a subtitle out of each of your looks. Okay, yeah. Now these very loving looks, very sweet looks. Sometimes they can look like God is in front of me and sometimes they look like God is judging me. So for me, it's really what gets to me is: so God is judging my voice, God is judging my looks, God is judging my actions, God is judging. And it comes like that. It doesn't say in these words and that's what is like, you know, it creates that and its main game is to shut me down. It wants to shut me down, put me in a corner, and after that all that—what do people think, comparison, this, that—starts. All that is, but this is what I feel I struggle with, Father. I don't know if I'm saying the right thing also.

That's good. If you feel that here what has happened is that there is a recognition of reality, re-recognition of who I really am. If you feel that, now do you feel like that can happen without recognizing the reality that there is God in everyone? Can that happen? You feel—

I want to go slowly because I know the answer. The reflex is to say, "Haha, of course not." But—

Does anybody come to the realization that God is only here? No, definitely. Like from the glimpse that I have had, not at all. It can't be possible. It's impossible.

So whatever is the highest you feel that I can feel about any of you, what I really feel about you, any of you, is much higher than that. Someone was also saying the other day of Hanuman Ji that we just have to—anyone who comes into our lives, we have to realize that it is God playing a role. It is God playing a role. God is wearing these clothes of the body and God is playing this role.

Father, it's—I'll just say it's very possible for me to do it, practice it elsewhere, but here I'm very out of—I don't know, like I'm not a—I can go in. I can feel God's love and all of that. I feel it, Father. But this thing, I'm not—something comes, you know, you know it. And all those who know me closely in the Sangha also have seen that, right? And I—yeah, I don't know how to—what to say, how to put it in words. It's—I've struggled with it before, though, Father, and it's very confusing now because I'll go now and I can teach everybody and I can—but why can't I speak here? Why can't I just—why can't I—why can't I sing here? Why do I have to go there and sing in here? Why am I supposed to be like—I don't want to be like that, you know.

There's no reason to be constricted.

Yeah. I—but I am. I want to say I'm really constricted here. I'm going to—

In fact, it should be easier for all of you here because you are the children of the house.

Yeah. There I will be the parent of the—there, and I'm very comfortable. I'm very easy, and not just in my retreat or whatever. Even if I go, like say I'll go now to that event, there also I'm going to—it'll take me—I mean, that little hesitation comes, you know, and you see like 100 people, 200 people, you're just—where are you? You feel—and then you just—I'm just chilled, I don't care who's thinking what of me. But why am I thinking so much? Why do I care so much who thinks what of me? I want to get over it, Father. I don't know how to, or if it's even possible. I don't know if it is even that, who's thinking what of me. If it is that, or it's my fear of you, if it comes from my dad, what is going on? I have no idea.

This itself is a good step.

But listen, yes, it's not. Okay, I'll tell you why. Yeah, it's not a good step. Why? Because if I take this step once a year, it's not a good step. It's a horrible step. Yeah. I really want to push myself into it. Every year I do this once. There'll be recordings every year. I'm bus, I'm bus, then I pick up the mic and I just say whatever. It's not a good step according to—it's horrible because I don't want to reach this place. No. Why can't I? How can I spend 10 years here like that? Why should I be so—what am I doing, Father? How do I—it's like a cage for me. I want to—

In the cage, when you feel like you're in the cage, where is God? Are God and you together in the cage?

So before I was going to tell you all this, I was deeply feeling Her name and I was feeling like why am I even going to say this because I'll have to leave this, right, to give this reality. Like I was seeing that. So, but am I supposed to address it? Am I not? Like I don't know.

It's a good question. So, stay with Him in loving attentiveness, Her in loving attentiveness to Her, and you'll be prompted from there itself as to how to move on the outside.

Are God and you together in the cage? So before I was going to tell you all this, I was deeply feeling her name and I was feeling like why am I even going to say this because I'll have to leave this right to give this reality. Like I was seeing that. So, but am I supposed to address it? Am I not like I don't know?

It's a good question. So, stay with him in loving attentiveness—her in loving attentiveness to her—and you'll be prompted from there itself as to how to move on the outside. This is very important for all of you because all of us have this question: How to remain in loving attentiveness of God when I have to go to work and I have to handle so many things? You see, so my time for God only becomes the focus prayer time. You see, but that focus prayer time is so that we learn how to practice how to be in every other time.

But father, if this comes and that is like I can feel so last satsang also, can both come together?

No, but it switches like it'll go black and white, black and white like that it'll switch and I—okay, try, try now. I know something is saying but if I go back to God then we are not resolving this issue. I want to resolve this issue. Okay, let's try but you'll resolve it. Don't worry, we won't close the conversation without resolving. Stay with God and welcome every obstruction, every constriction. It's a condition. Yes.

It is.

And all conditioning has to come up when we are finding our permanent home in our hearts with God. All conditioning has to be vomited out, has to be cleared up. You see, so then we are not to fear it from coming up. Remember that it is going, it is not coming.

I want to say one thing, you know, it's a very foolish thing and I would not say it, but I want to say because it's foolish. I don't want to hear this recording. You know, it's—I can't—I don't want to hear this recording later because something hates it. Like I just want—I don't want to hear my voice. I hate my voice. I hate, I hate my voice. Like how—

Like today if it's good news then you're sounding a bit different also.

Why?

It sounds not the usual way. It's like you have a bad—

You also hate it.

No, of course not at all.

It's quite bad. No, it's not. I don't have a bad throat.

Yeah, it's something like there's a—somewhere that's a condition. Probably as a child somebody told you or growing up somebody told you some stupid thing and then that stays with us and it becomes so deeply ingrained.

It's self-conscious.

Then imagine what it does. If a teacher of God decides that they hate their voice, then they won't put their videos out. They won't share.

I don't—I hate it. I wouldn't let them put anything on my Instagram where I'm talking. But are you leading people to God? Yes, you are. So if you are, then to allow a fear about what people will think of my voice to get in the way of—it's not just voice. I'll tell you this, Father. It's not just voice. It is—okay, I want to say this. It's like if a—like how my mind sees it. Okay. If my video is out there, it's going to say, 'This stupid girl, she's so...' It's like a complete impostor syndrome. It's called—what do you call it? It's a complete like you, like you, you are giving gyan, you are so—look at your voice, look at your face, look at what you're saying. You're such a fake. So I—I want to—I want to be nobody. I don't want to care. Like if I have to do my work, I want to speak about God. I want to speak about God. I don't want to be like the best speaker of God or whatever. Or I don't want to be like, you know, hating on that girl who tries, you know, in her own way. It's very bad.

I know that. Okay, who is the one most responsible for spreading Jesus's message all over the world?

The apostles.

Which one in particular?

Uh, no, uh, the rock, Peter? No.

St. Paul. Yes. So he was a stammerer. You see? So he was a stammerer but he was most responsible for spreading the message. So he even wrote to one of the territories, maybe Corinth. So he wrote a letter to the people of Corinth, the Corinthians, saying that when I met you there was a lot of stammering, you see, but don't go with the charismatics because in their charisma they will, you know, fool you, but know that you must listen to those who are speaking the voice of the Atma. He didn't say Atma, the Holy Spirit within, you see. So as long as you offer—your dharma as a teacher is to offer yourself up to the Atma to speak through you. That is the dharma. That is the only dharma and our intention to do that is all that we can do moment to moment. You see, now if you are doing that, you're allowing yourself to do that, then that voice must be heard. You see, that must be shared. It doesn't matter if it is stammering or if it is not that there's anything wrong at all with your voice. Firstly, I'm just saying that.

It's not just voice. No, it's everything. It's like I've always felt and I've told you this before. There's a spotlight, right? And it's an uncomfortable spotlight. And this spotlight, it came through maybe the—why does it come only in the recordings you share, you know, with so many people? Then it's not there that time. God, I feel God. I feel like I always sit there and I say, 'You, I don't know what to say, You say.' I always say this, Father, mostly whenever I can. And then and there also there's a judgment: 'You too love giving.' Yeah, 'You too just keep talking.' I'm only telling the bad side, Father.

Yeah, there's nothing that will convince me about the bad side. Don't worry. Even if you repeat it 100 times. So, does God tell you that you must—there's something wrong with you? There's something wrong with your voice, something wrong with your—

Never. God, God only gives me love, I feel, and gives me immense support.

So you have to leave that to get into that mode.

Yeah, definitely.

But so as your Father, can I tell you something?

Of course. Please.

Put all the recordings.

Now after this time, Father, I feel like I was so dumb before. Even now I might say something better now. I mean, if they're just foolish, Father, what will people learn from me? What's the problem?

You say that you feel God when you're sharing, then how can they be foolish?

I have felt gallons of light of God in me when I'm sharing.

How can they be foolish?

But I feel also I come in so much more like—I was so rigid. I'm learning to loosen up, I feel.

Okay. So even if that happens, it is better than so many who are sharing without any sense of God's presence. And we cannot wait for that perfection because if I waited for that perfection, not a single video of mine would be uploaded.

Father, where are you? Where am I? I'm like one—it's not—I'm like the not even the dust in your shoe, I feel.

God is the same. God is the same. So when any of us were to offer ourselves fully to God's presence and to allow him to speak through the instrument called the body, then that is satsang.

But what about—

So I see all of you as teachers of God. I've been saying this for years.

But what about this, this that happens?

If Radha Ma is with you now, what is this for her? Nothing. That thing for you. See, so it may has to work through a forgetting of God, isn't it?

Okay, tell me one thing. Okay, yeah, I hear you actually. No, I hear you what you're saying and that I know, like I was looking at it last few days in our song to Radha and we both talking about this so much. Now there are two Radhas. Yeah, there are—one is bada chiha. I was—I know that the more I stay with her, I know she'll take it away. I'm 100% sure of that. If there is a way, that's the way that I know. Like if this has to go, that's the way that I know that I have to stay with her and whatever condition is there will go. But it's very uncomfortable when it comes. Don't laugh at it.

I've done very well so far. So even that is a Maya trick, no?

Say how?

That 'I will be fine,' not in the knowledge that she is with me right now, but 'when it is completely done with.' You see, now even if we say, 'Yes, I know it will be done with but I'm waiting for that time,' it's actually not full faith yet in that moment. Ram is with me now and there's some affliction happening in the body. You see, then I don't say—I shouldn't say, I do say of course, but I shouldn't be saying, 'Yes, he's here now, I know that he'll take care of this and I'll be just fine after that.' You see, that he's here now should negate everything else as a condition for me to be absolutely full of wonder, joy, or everything, you see. Yes. Now on one side there's a grain of sand and the other side there is the Lord of the universe. The Maya trick is to say that this is what needs my focus right now. You see, many years ago it came to say in satsang that if I show someone a big, big wall, empty white wall, and I draw a tiny dot, blue dot on it, and I say, 'What do you see?' most people will say, 'I see the blue dot.' You see, hardly anyone says, 'I see the big white wall.' So that is our situation with Maya. It is not that Maya becomes bigger than God. It's just that with our attention, with our thoughts, everything becomes so fixated on the dot. We feel like the dot has to be managed first.

Yes, Father, I made this, you know, I want to say that it's just a kind of like now how it's feeling today, how it was—it was like a nagging voice which told me and I saw like it started making my body very tiny bit because I've decided I'm not really going to go with this buller, I'm not going to get bullied. So I'm, I'm, I'm really like strict with it now, but I felt because here because it has all these things, I felt it like kind of knocking and I just wanted to come up basically and see that it's not as it shows me it is. And I hear you when you say that don't focus on the dot because it is a dot. It is not the immensity of her, her love and her presence. It's not, it's not any comparison.

Adam dropped two children to Montessori school. I mean, in my life I've dropped children, my children to Montessori school. When do they get the most stomach ache, headache, all health issues, everything? Just going in that, go to school. Drop into school. And you say, 'Okay, you don't have to go.' Immediately it goes. You see, immediately it goes. So that is what Maya is doing with you and satsang. The place where it feels like most is going to be in trouble or it's scared of, that's where it's like, you know, poking for your attention. So, and at home, no, I'm having such a deep prayerful time. Here also I have, but many days I don't. Keep nagging you, 'Listen, listen, this happened,' and I want to get it out now. I want to see it's not actually so scary, you know, it's not. And I don't want to care who thinks what. What will I do? Like I often wonder, what will I do with ten people thinking good about me? What am I going to do with it? I'm not—I'm going to miss God, you know, going to waste my time on that. I can't. I don't know.

Yeah, that's why I keep saying the audience of one, not the audience of many. This many, this one that they are looking up to, all are going to die, finish. You see, billions have come, billions will go, nobody cares. Even if your name is remembered, so what? You are not going to have that name anymore. You see, so all of this is vanity. And vanity, the original word apparently comes from vapor, air. You see, it's just air. So all of this is air. Krishna also said millions are born, millions go in and out of me. I'm the only substance of it. He's the only substance of it. All this birth and death are meaningless. So what people think of us in that time is probably the most futile exercise to focus on.

Yeah.

Your name is remembered, so what? You are not going to have that name anymore. You see, so all of this is vanity. And vanity, the original word apparently comes from vapor, air. You see, it's just air. So all of this is air. Krishna also said millions are born, millions go in and out of me. I'm the only substance of it. He's the only substance of it. All this birth and death are meaningless. So what people think of us in that time is probably the most futile exercise to focus on.

Yeah.

See, yet it's a tough one because our pride is attacked in there. You see, so when this happens, we must be thankful and say, 'Thank you for showing me that I had this pride.' You see, now I'm going to prove to everyone even more how stupid, how much of a foolish beggar I am.

Yeah. I heard that when you told me because till I keep saving myself from you and from everyone, I'm going to be stagnating. I felt—and I can't bear it—it's like you said that day I told you also that I'm following when you said empty the soul of the false and it's about deification of the soul, then I really am trying to kind of drink that line that you said. And I can see like when it comes to emptying, when this comes, it feels like a mountain for me and it's so foolish when I meet it. Like now it's foolish, but it's good.

Yeah. So when we question who we are and the mind offers us these temptations in the form of pride—'What will people think? How do I want to be perceived? What do they hear me like? What do they see me like?'—you see, when we question who that 'me' is, we find that there's nobody there. Who is that one?

Father, in my case, sorry. Whose case this is an example? Who's in this identity when it's picked up?

Right now it's not there. Yeah. So when we determine that we will speak the truth, then what the false one is saying loses all relevance. And that's why I keep trying to motivate all you kids to not say 'but my mind is saying.' You see, because in the guise of 'but my mind is saying,' you're getting its point across. Like if you were to say 'but Maya is saying,' you see, then Maya is like the serpent. You see? So why do we have to say 'but the serpent is saying' because something must be buying into that somewhere. Only then is it relevant to bring it up and say, 'Now it is saying that I will spend more of my time repeating what it is saying' because somewhere we want for me to chop it or someone to chop it. You see, but now we might come to a point where we see, no, what is the source of this? So, is it Maya or is it God? You see, and have that warrior in you saying, 'No, if it's Maya, it does not belong to me. It is not true about me. I am not going to be its indirect lawyer by saying but it is saying.' You see, now many times we can get stuck in that 'but it is saying' for the whole life. No, the mind finds a good way, and the mind itself says 'but the mind is saying.' So just at some point we have to just chop it off.

Yeah.

Chopping it off is you hear only one voice. Chopping it off is to be with the presence of God. Now be here, only the present. And just be in it.

And that's fine. Whatever is there. All the conditions when they come out.

Tell me. You tell me.

I'll tell you when they come.

No, I'm saying you're with God. Huh? So we drew the picture. You're holding Sita Ma's hand. You see, she is there. The queen of the universe, the Lord of the universe is there with you. Now this pesky insect is going on, you know, irritating you in your ear. You see, now which one will get your focus?

Only her. Of course.

Of course. You see, it's like saying Lord Krishna showed Arjuna his Virat Rup. But you know, in that scene there was also a mosquito. So then, 'Lord, sorry, I missed it. Can you do that again because this mosquito is bothering me?' So every moment in our life is like that.

Yeah, it is like that. It really is so sad. It's not funny at all actually. The framing is funny because it sounds so absurd, but that is our life. Yeah. And when I say I can—so I just want—

Start now. Okay? Start to speak from here. Because we have to apply it then, because then Maya also tricks us. It's not sitting quietly hearing these things. No. It's not saying, 'Okay, I've been knocked out by Rocky' or something. It doesn't work like that. It will come and say, 'You know, I will take my next punch. I will take the next punch.' So it heard this, but it's going to say, 'See, but now what I think is...' again. And then see. So we have to be just vigilant to that. And we have to apply right then.

I can see, Father, now. I can see the light is... I can be in that. I'm not going to turn. I can turn also, but I'm going to stay, you know. And I can turn in a very sophisticated way like you say, you know, I don't want to do it.

You can become very meta about it.

Yeah. I'm just noticing. Exactly. That this is what it is.

Why are you noticing that? The Lord is showing you all his colors. Why you want to notice that? I don't want to notice the colors of the mind when the Lord is showing us his love. Yeah. Just abandon yourself there.

Not there. Yes. Yeah. I'm going too far.

And it's worth abandoning. And just like if you are in the Darshan constantly, then you don't even have to decide to abandon. Darshan itself is so magnificent—not in an imaginary way, not in a visualization way. The heart Darshan, which may be empty of all outpouring and perception at some time, that is so magnificent even though you may not be able to say this is what it looks like. You see that you don't want to turn away.

Father? You said we don't want to turn away, right? Like we don't have to determine that I have to jump into this more. We don't have to determine anything.

Yeah, that's true. Like you can't over there. Yes, the only thing is—maybe this is the point—which is that the only thing is that He will not force you to love.

Yeah, this is exactly what I want to ask. It's a choice every time. Yeah, okay, I'm going to remember.

See, and then you will see that this movement of people around you, this outer teacher, his body, his expressions, whatever—nothing. It is like that tiny mosquito. But you have to give credit to Maya where it's due; it makes it seem a worthy competitor to God and we turn away from our own inner life and we start focusing on the outside.

So Father, like if I give—like now when you said if this outer teacher and expressions—so for a moment like something happened, but I just have to stay with her and then it's not about me, right? That's basically it.

Absolutely. It's not about you. It's not about anything.

I just have to—like the Ram Ji that the way we are doing, if I just say Radha once fully, I'm with her fully and that's it actually. It's got nothing the other side, not you or me or it's nothing. Yeah, it's nothing. Say more.

I'm saying the other side is nothing. Say more about this. I want to repeat this point till most... If you have the sense of what I'm saying, it's a supreme privilege that God has given us his name. You see, God has given us in fact his names and we can call upon them. So like Bai said, even we are not so heartless that somebody keeps saying 'Ananta, Ananta, Ananta' and we don't turn towards them. Suppose somebody came to the hall and kept saying 'Ananta.' No, I have an important point I'm making, you see. So for some time, and then at the tenth time I will turn, no? 'Okay, yes please, what?' You see? So if we mere humans are not that heartless that we cannot not respond if somebody is calling our name, especially with love, then it's not possible for God not to respond. So what a great privilege that we have his name, her name, all the names possible, and he responds. Like he will not say, 'Oh, you called me Rama, actually my name is Ram, so sorry,' you know? It doesn't work. That is stupid. It doesn't. You see, do we feel like any of us, even if we're pundits in Sanskrit, will really be able to pronounce his name? Has he given us the name so that we pronounce them perfectly? No. They are just handles that we can hold on to to invoke him. You see, so whatever the name of God appeals to us in our heart, we can call upon him. Then what happens? It's not that he now starts looking at me. You see, but I am now in that faith that he is looking at me because I have called him. And that changes my position to openness, to love, to faith. You see, but I feel like in Maya's trick, what has happened is we don't realize the magnitude of this fact that we call upon God with his name or her name. You see, it's like saying that suppose somebody you really admire—thank you—suppose somebody you really admire, you got their phone number. You see, then you're like, 'Oh, I got this one's phone number.' You see, I don't know why I always say Tom Cruise, but I got Tom Cruise's phone number. You see, so somebody who's a real fan will get really excited. But not only have you gotten God's phone number, you've gotten his hotline number. Like he has to respond, like prime ministers have on their desk. No, apparently that's the emergency hotline that you have to respond to. So we have that for God. What a privilege that is. See, but the master skeptic which is the mind will always say, 'No, but this can't work like that. There are eight billion of us. How can you answer every phone call? It's not possible.' You see, so our mental beliefs which we use to limit our own shape and say we are this shape, we use to frame God also in a construct. You see, or we just get distracted. Like I'm sharing this and your mind is saying, 'Oh, but he's not looked at me whole Satsang.' What is that? Just tricks you into all kinds of foolishness. So I'm telling you about such an important, important, life-changing, transformative truth and your mind is saying, 'See, but he's not even looking at you.' So you see, that is the game that Maya tries to play. That is how it nags like that Montessori child. No, it'll say, 'Listen, listen, look at that, look at this,' to take you away from the wonder about this fact about the greatest privilege that we have. We can call upon God. The greatest privilege that we have, we can really inquire into who we really are. Who am I? Who are we invoking in that? Who are we trying to get a Darshan of in that question, 'Who am I?'

The same coming to you, Father. Who? What? What is my chance to come to you? My chance is really—

Yeah. For a human life to come to Satsang is very, very, very low probability right now. And let's work and change that. Let's work and change that as much as we can by making ourselves available to everyone. Now in any case, Maya will trick people and not bring them to us. So that is going to play out anyway. But we should not allow Maya to make a barrier. You see, 'your voice is like this, your expression is like that.' We cannot allow that because if our life is in service to him, then we must make ourselves non-performatively available to everyone that is open to this.

Father, this thing, you know, that I shared which is so difficult to even explain in words, this condition. I feel like it really stops me, Father.

Exactly.

I feel like I stop myself from sharing with the Sangha here also many times because I am so like the impostor. I've assumed that that voice which is in my head is actually in everybody else's head. You know, I've assumed that and from there it's like a dead end.

And that actually may be true. But the way that we have ignored that voice in our head, we have to ignore that as well and show everyone how to do that.

It really stops me, Father.

Exactly.

I feel like I stop myself from sharing with the Sangha here also many times because I am so like the impostor. I've assumed that that voice which is in my head is actually in everybody else's head. You know, I've assumed that, and from there it's like a dead end. It's not an—

And that actually may be true. But the way that we have ignored that voice in our head, we have to ignore that as well and show everyone to do that. The trickster is also one. Totally. Totally. Yeah. But remember that—I don't know why I'm saying this—remember that Maya is also God dressed up as the temptress.

What? Maya is also God alone dressed up as the temptress?

Yeah. You see, and they say in Christianity also that the devil is nothing but an angel who became proud.

Yeah. Is it? All this is pride, no, Father? All this is pride. I, you know, I could see like, because 'me' itself is pride. Like to take myself to be something is pride. That is the full fundamental ground on which all of this operates. Any focus to 'me', the false, operates on this 'me' which itself is notional, which itself is not reality. Right. So till this 'me' doesn't become so transparent, you see, till then we all suffering from pride.

Yeah. But it's—and even after it becomes so transparent, it is still there lurking. So nobody can presume that 'Now I'm done with my pride.' That itself is usually the sign of falling deeply into pride.

It's a relief that this 'me' is not me. This voice is not me. It's a huge relief like to meet it.

Yes. Like only so one with God or just the most foolish humble beggar servant of God. They can seem so far apart from each other, but actually they are the closest to each other. You see, which our mind cannot understand because in our mind it can sound like 'one with God' is 'I am the Lord of the universe' and 'most foolish humble servant of God' is 'most insignificant insect on one tiny world.' But because this is not linear, it is circular, these two are the closest to each other. Yeah, those two ends of the thread which actually connect.

And the only safety is in that—in that either the absence of 'me' with just a pure recognition in the heart, or just to be head bowed down as the servant. But not beggar servant on their own—of God. That is very important because many times it can just happen that I am a beggar servant on my own. That is not a true position. You see, 'I am the beggar servant, foolish beggar servant, stupidest one of them all, but God is holding me up. I belong to God. I am His.' You see, in the sense that many times it can sound like not only am I on my own now (which is the ego's stand that 'I am on my own, I have to fight this life, lead this life on my own'), not only am I that, I have further bad news for you: that I'm just a stupid foolish beggar servant. That's the worldly depression. That can sound the most, in a way, also very egotistical, you see. But that I am clearly nothing, nothing, nothing, but in this case there's a good 'but,' which is that: but God.

I heard today, I don't know in some talk, now sorry but um, if God then me what? Sorry, I'm sounding like a computer programmer that I am. But if God, then what must I be? If God is true, then if there is a 'me' which is independent in some way, then what is the stature of that 'me'?

Tinier than an ant. Nothing at all. Exactly. Even to say beggar servant is over this thing in God's kingdom. What am I? Nothing. Nothing. So unless I see that I am Him—you see, I am Him not in the power of Him but in the participation as Him. You see, so this can be a fallacy, no, that I saw in self-inquiry 'I am That,' you see, so now because I am the Lord of the universe, a slap is coming. So the closest way to put it is to say that we are one in participation.

No, my light had enough today. Okay, I've connected my phone. Maybe we can switch on some of the phone lights. So, in light of the magnificence of God, if there is a separate one from Him, what must that separate one be? Can't actually be compared. That's why the sages of the past use words like foolish beggar, humble servant, all of these things. Now these notions can be very oppressive if taken on their own. But in the light of the fact that that humble servant is God's child, then it is no longer oppressive because all confidence then comes from God's strength. So I love the word 'God-confidence.' Not confidence in myself, but supreme confidence in God.

You see, it's a fine line because the mind tries to take over that and make it about you. 'Oh, you are God's child.' See, everyone is, everything is, the whole creation is God's child. So the whole creation can have God-confidence, and most of creation does, as all the sages have told us. The birds don't worry, the fish don't worry where food is going to come from, how will they feed their children. They just fly and something happens and they find the food that they need. You see, it's a human condition to worry. So it seems like the rest of what we call nature lives in God-confidence, while we live in either a meekness, a weakness, or a false self-confidence. Small egoic confidence is pride.

So can we all agree that if God was not here right now, then there is no point of God? If God also came and went... yes, because God does not come and go. If God came and went, then God would be just like us. So God is here right now. So if God is here right now, if there is a problem, the problem must be only in the instruments which I'm using to see that, to find that truth. You see, because many, many those who we call sages have told us, 'Yes, He is right now.' So then our job has to be to find those same eyes that the sages used, is it? So the same eyes that the sages used are which ones? Eyes of the heart. Now you can use the eyes of the heart when you give up reliance on the other eyes or other modes of knowledge like thinking and taking only what your senses are showing you to be true. You see, it's like when I was giving the cup, no? If I'm not willing to hand over my true eyes, my old eyes, then how will I get new ones?

Now ask one more thing. You said that we don't have to wait for perfection, right? Exactly. So there's a kind of a notion here that I have about this, about like some benchmarking of spirituality, right? And in my experience, I trust and I know God will not hold back from me and His curriculum is—I mean, I actually when I'm with her, I don't have any of these benchmarks, right? It's like really a beggar servant. You have one little also, you're—it's more than enough for you, right? You don't even deserve that, it feels. So when I'm with her, it's like that. But this thing about not waiting for perfection, can you say?

Yeah. Yes. It's probably because of a nonsense idea of enlightenment that we have that's been fed to us, that the enlightened ones are then perfection themselves. And that's why I keep talking about Achintya, that even after you realize the oneness with God, in the expression, in our play in the world, we will always get caught up in some identification. And the only way to be safe in that is to only consider yourself as a servant of God.

One sec, you said when we realize our oneness with God. So when I meet, say, Radha's presence so much with love and all of that, that is me realizing my oneness with God or what is it?

Yeah. And that just deepens, right? That sweetens and sweetens and deepens and deepens till you find that you cannot place yourself anymore, right? You cannot place your 'me' anywhere.

So with that, that point is what my mind picks on. Yeah.

So that's why I've always tried to say that don't confuse an awakening experience to mean a finality. Because that's what Maya uses. Once you start to believe that it's done for you, you're the most fertile ground for pride, right? For any of us. So all of us become the most fertile ground for pride. If we start to think that there is no room to grow, that is big trouble. And it is offered in the modern world in this form because teachers wanted followers, teachers wanted to replace themselves with God and say that 'Only look at me, I am enough.' And it can be done in the most beautiful way where a devotee, a disciple, can have a lot of faith in their teacher, but the teacher has to keep talking about the fact that as the body-mind they are not special, they are nobody. As only an instrument of God, they are useful, and therefore all reverence must be pointed to the source of where all of this beauty, love, and truth comes from. You see, and the body of the teacher is at best just an instrument, an instrument which you may in your heart feel reverence for, but that cannot be the final destination of your reverence. So till it's a nice placeholder, the form of the teacher is a nice placeholder, but the form of the teacher must keep pointing us to that which is, who is beyond form. But in the modern idea of enlightenment it has become that...

But Father, so when we are meeting God, God's presence... I don't know how to ask this. Are you getting my question?

See, that One is getting your question. This instrument has some way to go yet.

Wait, I'll tell you. Wait. It's very hard to ask these questions and even harder to presume them definitely. So I have a question related to that.

Okay.

Then you're saying that even if we have, even then we can have balance of God. Yes, because that gully is moment to moment and that time it's full. No, that is the point.

The point is that it's not that 'Oh, now this gully is no entry for me and now it is only for God.' That can be our intention, but you see that this Antahkarana, which is the gully, is now only for God. But we immerse ourselves in selfishness and pride and grasping, and then that is just lip service. So it has to be done over and over, over and over. You see, the road is not static, that once God came, finished, the road vanishes. You see, it's not like that. The road is there. God, God, Ram. You see, what is that Ram Ram? What is that Radha Radha? What is that Jesus Jesus? What is that Allah? All Allah. You see, you're filling that road with God again and again, again and again.

You see, same for the inquiry. Yes. Same. Who am I? The 'Who am I?' is beautiful because empty is the road of the false one. The minute you question it, it says 'Run.' You see, like 'Who are you?' Unless you made mental knowledge out of your inquiry. The minute you question, 'Oh, who wants?' You see, who is the one that wants? Who is the one that's not understanding? You ask any of this question, he says, 'I'll come back later. Bye.' So the road cleanup happened and then in that 'I', it just like—say, okay, hear this very carefully with the right ears. Okay. When you question 'I', it's just like saying Ram, Radha, Jesus, Allah, that 'I' which is the birthplace of the 'I am.' You see, so that in that beautiful question, 'Who am I?', we are emptying the road of the false one and inviting the true one to come. That 'I'—don't start chanting 'I, I, I.' It may be too premature for that, all of us including myself, because there's another—yeah, sorry, there's another one who loves chanting 'I', which is the proud one. You be careful.

Father, you said gully is saki and that every moment when we come, we come to God or we have the choice to go. So every moment that we come to God, we come to God in full perfection, right? Like, you know, what I'm not like lacking—

God is always in full perfection. Full perfection. Every time we encounter Him. We don't have to worry that it's not—we don't have to worry. Yeah. Because like if you were to use St.

I love chanting. It is the proud one you have to be careful of. Father, you said Gali is Saki and that every moment when we come, we come to God or we have the choice to go. So every moment that we come to God, we come to God in full perfection, right? Like, you know, I'm not lacking.

God is always in full perfection.

Full perfection. Every time we encounter Him.

Yeah. We don't have to worry.

Yeah. Because like, if you were to use St. Teresa's terminology, there are parts of this that we have to do and parts of it that He does, which is the recollection onwards, infused prayer onwards. Those, we can never judge them with human eyes. We can never say, 'Less than perfect' or 'Oh, some more love would have been better.' We cannot say that.

So I never have to worry about when I come to the presence. I never have to beat myself with any ideas of—

Only worry about pride.

Pride, okay. Never worry about anything else.

This is also pride. You know, then that perfection, it's like a blind spot basically of progress. A blind spot in progress, right? Yeah. So this is what I feel like; I don't want it to hold me back because I don't want to be niche anywhere in the ladder. I just want to come to Her and then I just want to be there. That's what I have to do, right?

Yes. And this one, give to Her right now. You see, because this one will again start saying, 'Is this good? Is this right? Is this perfect?' You see, dissolve that one in full innocence. Okay?

I'm happy I'm saying all this. I wouldn't see it otherwise. Yeah. What do we remember of ourselves when we are in Darshan of God?

Nothing.

Is it a man having a Darshan of God?

Not at all.

Woman? Somebody who started the practice?

Not at all. None of these.

Nothing.

That's it.

Okay. So, no analysis at all.

Yeah. And no, not too much planning, strategizing, tactics—none of that. You have God's name. You have the inquiry. More than enough. The faith in both those practices, either of those practices, will deepen as you stay with them in the sense that the deepening of the faith is the letting go of the forgetting. The deepening of the faith is when the relevance of this world, this Maya, becomes more and more apparent in relation to God. And God Himself is seen as the world, as whatever is manifesting. What is a good antidote to pride? Another antidote to pride is this—I heard Bhai say this—he said if you just meet everyone as if they are just God dressed up in that body. You see, you just make a practice out of this also, that you just meet everyone as if it is God dressed up in that body. God dressed up in that body. Then soon you start to see it like that.

Father, I want to say this. I feel like that really poked me somewhere. It's good. That felt like one chamat that give this one also.

Yeah. Because then that means that something was being held onto there. Yeah. So that's a good sign also. Then if something feels like a chop—

Yeah. Yeah.

Although the intention was not to chop at all.

No. Then that's a good sign because then you are noticing that maybe something got too strongly made as a plan.

Yeah, I can see, Father, the planner. I can see the planner actually; through that, I could see that.

Yeah. So that says, 'Okay, now I know what I have to do. Through this, I will find God and meet God.' You see?

Yeah. But that one has to go because it makes us very closed. Because one instruction is there for us today; tomorrow some other instruction may be there for you. Helpless in ourselves, confident in God. Helpless in ourselves, confident in God.

Father, so to meet things without making positions is so important actually, to not meet them—

Yes.

Like not—

That's the trick.

Yeah. Because otherwise, whether we like it or not, we will become proud. If you feel like, 'Now I have the perfect way for me today,' that might be in a very useful, helpful way that, 'Oh, I found the perfect path for me. Thank you so much.' You see, but day after tomorrow, it will start comparing your perfect path to everybody else's imperfect-seeming path. And some pride will come because of that. You see, it seeps in in these ways. In this way, then, devotion to the Master is helpful because you just say, 'I don't know really what he has told me to do this, so that's what I'm following for now. Tomorrow he may be telling me to do something else.' You see, so we can never build a foundation for the ego in our spirituality. But what we have been guided to, we must then dive in fullheartedly. Look at the absurd situation of our life. We have God's name and yet we worry. And I explained to you that God's name is not just a name. It's a hotline to Him. You see, that He has to answer. So if you have a hotline to God, how can you worry?

Is the name higher than the form of it, or closer?

There's no difference. There's no difference. Whatever gets you to Him. So again, if you apply the same thing, you see. So you see Ragu and Raghav? Two friends who passed away and went to Ram Ji. So then Ram Ji said to Ragu that, 'You did very well because you kept calling Ram, Ram, Ram.' But He said to Raghav, 'You know, you made a mistake because you didn't say my name, Ram, Ram, Ram. You just kept looking at my picture.' Do you think that could happen? I only—so just to simplify it for you and for all of us, when our focus is not on 'me' and it is turned towards God, and it's always going to be turned towards God in an imperfect way, that's all that's needed.

Because the other day you said there's only—we were talking about all these names and forms and you said there is only one, let's not forget.

Yeah.

And I think my question was aiming a little bit at that because I was reading Papaji and he said something very controversial that I—

Papaji or Papa?

Yeah, Papaji. Yeah. Nothing else.

Just get him to answer.

What?

If the question is too difficult, we'll ask him to answer.

He said controversial ritual. Yeah. He was saying that the gods come to earth to take Satsang from the enlightened ones. And that even Ram had attachments, and Krishna. And so I also remember—I can't remember who it was, I can't remember if it was Hanuman or Tulsi, I can't remember who it was, but—

And came to Tulsi.

Yeah. Someone said that the name of Ram is the highest. So, it reminded me of that. So, the question went to: is it true that the form of Ram—and if so, Jesus—is lower in a way than God itself? And also that the name is higher than that form because it brings us to the real, which is beyond the form that incarnated on earth?

Okay. So he said that—no, Papaji said the thing about the gods coming to attend Satsang, yes. So there are many—usually in India you'll find, and anywhere in the world you'll find also, but in India also you'll find that everyone that's following a particular path, they'll say that their path is only the highest. You see, so if they are on a Ram Bhakti path, then Ram is only highest. If they are on a Krishna Bhakti path, then Krishna is only the highest and everybody else they say is deluded. You see, but there are also sages who tell us that to make differences in God based on name and form is the greatest stupidity and maybe the greatest sin. You see, now which one are you going to listen to? Between the two schools of thought—which is, somehow it always works out that the path that we are on seems to work out to be the highest. And the second school of thought, which is that it's a sheer foolishness to make distinctions and categories between forms of God.

Yeah. I don't feel that there's a distinction between forms. Like, I wouldn't be able to say what difference there is between Ram and Jesus.

Yes. But high and low has to mean some distinction.

Yeah, I felt what that what he was saying was that these incarnations were lower than the enlightened ones. I felt that that's what he was saying and I thought—

That's quite a thing to say. All kinds of things. It is true that there's a lot of history where, like Ram Ji Himself came to meet Tulsidas Ji. You see, that that was a good use of His time. Not that, 'Oh, He came to meet Tulsi Ji to get something from him,' or Hanuman Ji came to meet Tulsi Ji to get something from him. If I'm a deep lover of God, what better use of my time than to meet other lovers of God? And then yeah, all the gods keep meeting each other. Like Shiv Ji came for Ram Ji's birth. Then he came various times in his life and Ram Ji built an idol to Shiv Ji called Rameshwar. He said that Shiv Ji is the God for Ram. What to do?

Yeah. Yeah. I wasn't going to say anything but then—

No, no, it's fine. It's a good conversation. So, Ram is saying that Shiv is his God and Shiv Ji is saying that Ram is his God. So the lesson I would learn from that is that if our God Himself is that humble, then we better learn from Him that even in all His expressions, all His things, He's just full of reverence for God. We can learn that from Him. Now in our history there have been such great sages, great teachers, that God Himself—especially the demigods, there are some demigods also like Indra and his people who then used to go to these beautiful Satsangs and teachers were that great and they would learn from them. You see, it is also said that the Lord Himself would revere some of the sages. So He would touch their feet and do these things. So it is just His humility, His love. But I don't feel like any teacher has said that, you know, like, 'God comes to Satsang to hear me speak.'

Yeah. I had trouble—

Like He may learn something. Yeah.

I had trouble reading that because I felt that it implied that Jesus was lower than an enlightened one.

No. Okay. Yeah. Exactly. Yeah. Yeah. You can learn from all our elders, all the ones who have come before us, but we can always rely on God's presence in the moment more than anything written in any book or any testimony or any history. In that way, it remains a living knowledge. We talked about it last time, that I love Swami Satyananda Saraswati because he said that your intuitive insight gets a higher position than the words of scripture. And it's a very logical thing to say also because the words of scripture are reverential because they came from intuitive insight, you see, by those sages. Now anytime we get into a fallacy that intuitive insight only used to operate thousands of years ago and now it stopped operating after that—it's not true. The same one who gave the Vedas to those sages thousands and thousands of years ago is the one who sits in your heart and guides you. So the author of all the scriptures is right there with you. Yeah. So whenever we come, what to do when we find some troubling things? And you'll find some troubling things with all teachers, especially myself, you'll find thousands of them. So what to do with them? Just say, 'Okay, this one troubling thing is there. Now were there 99 other helpful things or not?' You see, now if the ratio is not 99 to 1, then you leave that teacher. You leave that teacher. But if it is 99 to 1, then focus on the 99, forget about the other, because that 100% teacher you will not find, you see. But if it's 50/50 also, then I would not go to that teacher. I have to deal with a lot of things which my heart doesn't agree with. Half of them I can't agree with; the other half seems to be helpful. No, there you will find that 99 to 1. Look at a book called 'I Am That,' so beautiful. But because of, I feel, because of translation issues, half the times 'awareness' is misused, 'consciousness' is misused; this is just being plugged in randomly. And on many occasions, because maybe the one who was translating—I don't know what words in Marathi Maharaj was using to share that—but because the translator probably at that moment did not get the sense of what they were writing fully. That's why a lot of those pointers can be misunderstood. But overall, is it a good book? Of course, it's fantastic. It's like that.

Because of translation issues, half the time awareness is misused, consciousness is misused; this is just being plugged in randomly. On many occasions, because maybe the one who was translating—I don't know what words in Marathi Maharaj was using to share that—but because the translator probably at that moment did not get the sense of what they were writing fully, that's why a lot of those pointers can be misunderstood. But overall, is it a good book? Of course, it's fantastic. It's like that. So, you can value that because the 99:1 ratio applies. But what is the nature of Maya? Focus on the little red dot. That same thing—white one, blue dot—that has to be resolved for some. And what happens after it is resolved? It's forgotten, you see, and something else comes.

Yeah, I let it go and I wasn't going to bring it up, and then somehow it came back.

It's very good. It's very, very good.

He says a lot of very interesting things, so I guess something kind of gets attracted to that as well because it's him.

So between the two camps, I'm one—I'm sure you can guess—who considers it to be the biggest foolishness to say that this expression of the Lord was worse or better than this expression. We are of course free to say, 'Ram Ji appeals to me in my heart more than Shiv Ji.' You see? But we can only say for the moment. But this, I don't have any power to do it. But if it were up to me, I would dissolve all these stupid boundaries between religions and incarnations and all of these things. One God, million pathways to God. God expresses Himself in this beautiful way. Whenever there's too much trouble on our tiny little planet, He comes, He reveals Himself as the Lord in full God and full human ways. And to say this one is higher or that one is higher—how does it help? You see, suppose I had a list: Krishna number one, Ram Ji number two, then Matsya number three, then this Avatar number four, and then Jesus somewhere number six. What am I going to do with that list? You go to the highest, huh?

The highest one. To the highest. So just like He is the one, Krishna is the one now. But as long as I go to Krishna and I keep saying that the others are not as high as Him, I don't feel like I'll get anywhere. I may say Krishna is the one for me, He is number one for me. The minute I say He has to be number one for everyone, then with that pride, will I get entry into Krishna's Vaikuntha? No, I won't.

For the moment you come.

Exactly. And then the mind uses that to trouble you, no? 'Oh, last year you were doing Krishna, Krishna.' God knows everything.

Baba wrote a song. I heard Baba wrote a song for that role. The seven names of God in one song.

Really beautiful.

Yeah. I love that kind of universal love type thing. This divisive stuff is too much. So, what to do to not bother our insides with this stuff? If it troubles you, throw it away. If it troubles you somewhere in the heart. If it troubles your intellect, it's very good; then stay with it and contemplate. You see? But if it troubles you somewhere in the heart, it hurts you, just throw it away. If something has to reveal itself later, it's fine. It's good.

It's good that you make that distinction.

Yes, it's very... Maharaj himself said when somebody said, 'I can't get this part about what you say. I just don't agree with this part about what you say,' he said, 'But there are a hundred other things. Do you agree with that? Do you stay with that? That's enough. You leave that.' That's the nature of our mind. Many people come to satsang here, they hear the full satsang, and they go by saying, 'You know, that one thing he said, that's why I don't come to satsang.' But what about the others? There's so much being spoken. Will you waste the opportunity to be in satsang because of one thing you found you didn't agree with, or even five things you found that you didn't agree with? If the ratio is 5 to 500, then it's fine. But if there are five things and then there were five things only which your heart resonated with, then this is not the right place to be for those who come. If your intention is true—I mean, if you really want to be in God—if I say Ram or Rama, it doesn't matter. And the same with the sage; if you're really reading that book with reverence or to understand, that openness itself, somehow grace will come and give that. Suppose you really have a true question; He answers it and takes away that doubt, like even now you're telling in satsang. So, He'll figure out a way to get it.

But mostly this guidance which I shared is for people like me who... like, that's a chicken and egg problem. You're reading the book so that you can come to that point of openness, of love, of devotion. So, if that becomes the prerequisite to reading the book, then... so it depends on the stage of where we are in our spiritual quest as well.

Okay. But in all of this, don't forget the main thing, which is God, and the fact that you have God's name. And God's name gives you access to Him, more intimate access than being in His room. Like, you put yourself in His heart by taking His name. You become central for Him. When you take His name, you're all that matters to Him when you take His name. Huh? How He manages time? Don't ask me, but He does. You see? So forget the foolish one who spoke these words, but what has been spoken is very sacred. If you just use that, then Maya cannot come close to you. If you have the Lord's name at any level of your antahkarana, Maya cannot come close to you, and then more and more your heart will belong to God and that relationship of love will only deepen. Same for the inquiry. If you take it on, then don't leave it. Remember, we are practicing only so that we can live it the rest of the day. Our practice is not just for that practice. We practice to apply. We don't practice just to practice, no; we practice to apply. So we practice this sadhana, whether it's taking God's name or doing the inquiry, so that we can apply it throughout our day, throughout our life. So, if God gives us the opportunity to be by ourselves for some time and practice, then continue that. Our practice should not end saying, 'Now time's up, now it is time for the mind, for Maya.' Keep it alive. Nothing will go wrong. You see, nothing will go wrong. If there is something to be done, who can do it better, God or you?

We leave His name. Why?

Why do we leave His name? Because it's something I have to do, you see. But if it has to be done, who can do it better? If He didn't want it done, the whole world would dissolve. If it is not His will, then put all your effort, all of that, and just when it's time, you may die, the whole world may dissolve. We have no power in this. You see? So, let me put it another way—I know I complicated it. Can anything ever get worse if Ram Ji is here? Can we ever say, 'Oh, why did you come down? I was busy doing something. Why did you have to come?' You see? But actually, that's how we live. We feel like this we have to do ourselves. 'You see, now You go away.' You see? So we have shunned Him and shunned Him and shunned Him in our life constantly, even in our spiritual life. You see? And yet He is waiting patiently to be called. Look at that humility. Look at that humility. The Lord of the universe waits for us. And then if we call Him and if we don't feel love or peace or joy instantly, then we feel like, 'You betrayed me. I called You, You didn't do anything,' after shunning Him all our life. So this is our pride. It's His mercy that He accepts us as foolish children and says, 'Okay children, it's okay.' So then, now that you know this, now that you know that God's name is with you and how it is so powerful, may none of you waste this insight. May you apply it. May you have the intention at least to spend every waking moment of your life in His remembrance, in His presence. And remember that it has nothing to do with the path that you pick. I explained to you how 'Who am I?' is the same thing. You see, this is the way to unceasing prayer or ananta prayer, ananta japa. So, Baiji says three things have made the most difference to him in his life. First is taking God's name. Second is trusting God's grace with full faith. Just trust Him fully with full faith. And the third is meet everyone as if meeting God. So, I'm meeting you in the form of the seeker, but I know you are God. Like that, just meet everyone in your life like that because it's very true. And we can never become proud if you do that. As we, as ourselves, meet them as God. In that, there can be a sense of parity in what you said, which is very beautiful, but there can be a sense of parity. What I'm saying is, yes, maybe we don't bow down to everyone outwardly—maybe we do—but at least inwardly. He has said one of the greatest sages to have ever lived has given us the roadmap. He said these three things took care of everything. And you know that he was a freedom fighter, so he was imprisoned, he was in various kinds of trouble, all kinds of things. But just by these three things, he says that Gandhiji treats me as family. You see? All the beautiful ones in this world, they are close to me although I came from nowhere. You see? All by God's grace, taking His name. So, all in our lives will be taken care of. So, saying the name or constant self-inquiry, trusting that His grace is more than enough to take care of everything that ever happens to you—every single problem of yours fully taken care of by His grace. That's the second thing. And to meet everyone as if they are God, just in the disguise of whatever body they are wearing. Beautiful. And my feeling is if you do the first constantly, the other two will naturally happen. So don't worry about how will I juggle three variables. Do the first. Stay with God. Stay with Him, stay with Him, stay with Him in name, in presence, whichever way. Stay with Him.

I feel there is such fire in these ones when I see their story, like the story of Papaji or many others. It really is like their head is on fire and they're finding that pond of water. It really...

Their head is on fire.

Yeah, I heard that metaphor a long time ago. You have to look for God as if your head was on fire and you're looking for that little pond of water. And whenever I read about them or I hear their story, it is like that. I don't... I'm waiting for part two. I don't feel my fire is like theirs.

Yeah. So do step one. Is the fire going up or down? I don't know. It felt more fiery at the beginning. I don't know if the fire is going up or down.

Yeah. Okay. I'll take your word for that one for now.

Okay. You stay with this unceasingly.

Yeah. Yes. But I'll fail. I'm saying yes, but I'll...

Predicting.

Yeah.

I'm predicting it'll not.

I mean, I'll falter a lot because that's been the case.

All of us. I don't feel anyone will falter as much as I did or do. All of us will falter. When we fall down, what to do? Get back up. Don't think about falling down. This is a good example. This moment is for whom? This moment is for whom? This moment is for whom? Now, after three moments of God, this moment God has to be like that. Because the minute it says, 'Okay, now four moments went with God. Now what's happening to me?' you see, then that can become 40 moments. Then that can become 40 days. You see? So then you notice yourself getting back into 'me, me,' come back to God. That's all. How to turn to God? You know. You know, all of you know. Take God's name, do the self-inquiry, stay with His presence. All the tips—open and empty—everything is for that. But it has to be applied constantly, constantly, constantly. Because then, if you're trying to fill your cup with Amrit, the immortal nectar, which is the Atma itself—if you're trying to fill your cup with that—then how much Coca-Cola can you mix into it? You see? So constantly we have to empty out the egotism and fill with God. How much time do we have? Swami Ramsukhdas Ji says the wealth that we are building is completely nonsensical.

With His presence, all the tips, open and empty, everything is for that. But it has to be applied constantly, constantly, constantly because if you're trying to fill your cup with Amrit, the immortal nectar, which is the Atma itself, if you're trying to fill your cup with that, then how much Coca-Cola can you mix into it? You see, so constantly we have to empty out the egotism and fill with God. How much time do we have? Swami Ram Sukhdas Ji says the wealth that we are building is completely nonsensical. It won't help us at all when we need help the most. But the wealth that we should build is the spiritual wealth that is the only wealth we take along.

How seriously to take the words of the sages? Not much. Like, what do they know? Why am I plotting like that? Because that is the nature of the mind. No, we hear these things every day. But somewhere Maya works and it's okay, we'll see, there's time. All the sages have told us there's no time. But we live like we have time. So that disconnect we have to break somewhere and what is being asked of us: Spend your time with the highest. What is the bad news in there? If you have to find God, you have come to satsang and you want to have Atma Darshan, why are you not doing it? If you're not doing it, then why are you here? Why are you sitting? Then go away, don't waste your time. Literally just as directly as that. Here is only you have to find God and that's why he says you should be so grateful you found the path and there was this desire in your heart to do the thing.

So, how many of us are in this together now? Unceasing prayer, and prayer includes inquiry, everything. Yes. Nobody on Zoom? Okay. One, two, three.

Now just be precious. Sometimes other things can still happen. Through that I find some way to leave.

Other things will happen in the sense work may continue to happen with the body. Parenting may continue to happen through the body. Husbanding may continue to happen through the body. Although very little if you ask, but you know all these things will continue to happen to the body, but that doesn't mean that we leave Him because who can play all of these roles better than Him? You see, other things can continue to happen. We don't go anywhere. We stay with Him. Do you all have the tools that you need for the unceasing presence, to be with the unceasing presence of God? All have the tools. You're new, my dear. You, how do you feel? You have the tools you need to be with God? Do you feel like you have the pathway clear?

Don't worry. Don't worry. I try and sometimes in some moments I have felt it but again doubts come and somewhere it feels like maybe I'm not ready yet or sometimes it feels that maybe I should focus on some other things and some other times I also feel betrayed. I understand I am very small and very little trying to go back.

Today is never too late. Today is never too late. Tomorrow will be. So start today. Start today. Doubts come. Many times we feel like I'm not made for this. I'm not cut out for this. You see, but all of us are only made for this. How do we know? You see, how do we know? Nothing else gives us lasting contentment. True or no? That's why you're here. Mostly people don't come here because something... you must not be finding full contentment in something else which brings you to satsang like this where there's nothing that it promises you in the world. I have not promised a stress-free life. I have not promised a healthy body. I've not promised anything. I am only promising that there's a pathway to God that you can be with Him. You see? So, and you're still here after three hours. You see? So, whether your mind realizes it or not, something must be ready for this. Don't worry. What are the other options? What do you speak at home?

I'm from Bengali.

Bengali. Only I have... my parents gave me a Bengali first name but my Bengali is really bad. But many times we say that maybe I'm not cut out for this or this is not for me, spirituality or God is not for me. So I always ask, so what is option B? Sometimes I don't know those options.

Maybe this is the only option but not always it is.

Correct, exactly, exactly. But if you look at it even rationally, you see, like spirituality is not a rational path actually, but if you look at this question even rationally that okay, I'm not cut out for God, then am I cut out for money? Am I cut out for relationship? Am I cut out for just taking care of the body? Am I just cut out for intellectual understanding of science and things like that? You see, and where does all of that end? You see, it needs a very quick end when we question. Yeah, like we say, what is the point of searching for God? But what is the point of everything else?

So, I don't know if some of you heard, but the creator of this comic called Dilbert, the office one, Dilbert. So, he just passed away yesterday or day before. Can somebody pull out his note? If you just do a search for Scott Adams, last will, he's got something interesting he said over there. We'll close satsang with that. He was the creator of this comic which became very popular called Dilbert where they would make fun of this whole cubicle culture and office space politics and all of these things. So he passed away but in the last few days he wrote a will. So he was an atheist but see what he writes.

Yeah, my final will and yes, only message. A final message from Scott Adams and I may not read the full thing but if you are reading this, things did not go well for me. I have a few things to say before I go. My body failed before my brain and I am of sound mind as I write this, January 1st, 2026. If you wonder about any of my choices for my estate or anything else, please know that I am free of any coercion or inappropriate influence of any sort. I promise. Next, many of my Christian friends have asked me to find Jesus before I go. I am not a believer but I admit the risk-reward calculation for doing so looks attractive just from three or four days before dying. He says, I have to admit the risk-reward calculation for doing so looks attractive. So here I go. I accept Jesus Christ as my Lord and Savior and I look forward to spending an eternity with him. The part about me not being a believer should be quickly resolved if I woke up in heaven. I won't need any more convincing than that. And I hope I'm qualified for entry.

I didn't read any further than that. But what's happening here? Someone has been given the diagnosis. It's the last few hours of their life. And they're realizing that besides passing on their estate, what is it that they can hope to have in store for them? This body is going to go. You see, so at least in his last few days, he gave up on that pride and made that petition to God. You see, now I don't know, God is merciful and we all pray that his wish comes true, but we should never bring our life to this point.

In India people say in the last breath if you remember Ram Ji's name then Ram will give you home at His feet. But it's also made clear that till you haven't remembered Him for most of your life, it's not going to happen at the last moment. So that last moment remembrance is just like this petition which I found very powerful, like a very powerful statement on the human condition from a commentator of the human condition who has seen life at very close range. He also said that I'm not a believer but what could it hurt? What could it hurt? But somewhere behind that 'what could it hurt' is that fear of an uncertainty or missing out on the highest possibility.

So we must not allow our lives to bring us to that end. Easy. Can we come to a point where we'll meet our death with God-confidence? And that will happen through our Bhakti, through our sadhana, through our satsang in this life. Here's a man who has everything: fame, everybody knows about him. He is so far away, we are sitting talking about him. Obviously had money, that's why he had a will for his estate. You see, everything, and yet when life itself is about to be taken then you face that and you say, what do I really have? And in this case, what do I really know? Very touching. I felt it very important to read this. He says he's asking readers to be useful. Maybe his way of saying service. It's that really we talk about the ephemeral nature of this life constantly in satsang but it really hits you like this. Imagine getting the diagnosis that you have a few days to live. All right. Okay. Thank you.

Yes. Yes. Please. Thank you. Both of us. I'll bring the equalizer to your beautiful singing and do the neutralizing. What was the lyric? He's coming. So by Brao to Rock something. Might come coming by ra this one. May down. No. Might go by. Okay. Mighty Magch. Something something for this.