God’s Home Is in Your Heart - 31st January 2025

So then what happens? Okay, then God is here. So you could be purely conceptual about it, right? You could say, 'Okay, if He's here, this means that He must be in this room. He never leaves me. He must be attainable. I don't have to search,' you see. But it's still, we can have a distance and it can be just purely conceptual. You're here with me? So just upon the hearing of it doesn't make many inroads. Just the squeezing of it has more opportunity to come to a deeper insight, but it is not to be taken for granted, you see. So you may do a lot of wordplay, you may become a poet around the notion, you may be an expert at that. You may be given any words, any spiritually charged words, and you may come up with a great discourse, a great elaboration. But what is missing with me?

Experience. The experience of it.

Very good. The direct insight of it, the meeting of it. And that meeting of it is the mystery, because nobody can force this meeting. So because it's a mystery and there, really, I've done my part of the bargain, the rest has to be done by God Himself, by the Satguru Atma itself. Then it's probably a good idea to do what? To pray and say, 'I've reached the end of my capacity, but I really recognize that this can only be Your gift. The true sweetness of the juice that I have squeezed out, the tasting of it, is only in Your hands, Lord. Only in Your hands, God. So please help me, if it is Your will, for me to really get a sense of this fact that God is here.' Is it?

And then now we've spoken our part, we've done our bit, because prayer is the maximum that we can go to. Then we have to leave the floor to God. And nobody can really describe what happens next. And that's why most people will say, including myself, I will only say that we come into a period of silence. But that silence is a very rich silence. That empty, which sounds like a very hollow word, is actually rich, is it? Because that is when the true Guru has taken us by the hand and pulled us into a deeper place where spirituality really happens. It is only there that spirituality can really happen.

What does that mean, spirituality can really happen? You see, roughly, with very gross sort of words, we can say that insight flowers and love is tasted, true love, is it? But words cannot describe the magic that happens there. So this is why the sages have spoken so much, have written so much. That is this is why, in a small childlike attempt to emulate the path, this foolish man also speaks in satsang, so that you find some pointers like that which, if you truly meet in the silent chamber of your heart where God can guide us—His presence called the Atma can guide us there—we start to flower in our spirituality, start to deepen in our spirituality.

So it's actually a very straightforward, simple way, very straightforward and simple way of what satsang actually is meant for, is it? Now you may come to satsang and you may just hear, which it is the first step, it needs to be done, you see. You hear, but if it just stops at hearing and, worse, if it makes a home in the intellect alone, you see, then that will be not very productive. In fact, sometimes it may even be counterproductive, you see. So we start over there, but we try to get the essence of what is being pointed to. Then we pray for His assistance, His grace, to enter the mysterious chamber of spirituality. The true spirituality actually can blossom.

Now what is needed for this? The smarter you are here, is that what you need? Like if I say 'God is here,' you can say, 'Brihadaranyaka verse 55, chapter 7 says also this. Kena Upanishad says like that. In the Gita, the Lord said like this, and the Quran, the Lord said like that.' And then you can, and then that can give an illusion of knowing something, isn't it? Many get into that trap. But is that what is needed? That's not what is needed, unless it is coming naturally and they used all that spiritual insight to deepen more and more into the direct insight, the direct darshan of God Himself. Just bookish knowledge by itself, uncultivated, unmarinated in the heart's presence, in the heart's light, in the heart's love itself, doesn't hold much value, see? But it is a required first step. It is required.

So our hearing satsang, our contemplating, reading, our contemplative reading, all of that is a good first step so that we can allow ourselves to dive in. Now if a diver wanted to dive in with just one limb or half the body and wanted to keep half the body outside in the pool, then what would you say? It's a foolish thing. It's not going to get anywhere, isn't it? So when we dive in, we have to dive in in our entirety. So this process is a process of collecting ourselves in this way and diving in to the heart. Because otherwise what may happen is you may hear 'God is here, God is here,' so you want to dive in with that, but on the other hand there's some important email to send.

I started sharing satsang 12 years back, okay, so the examples are dated like that. So some important email to send. So half the time is going 'God is here,' half the time your mind is distracting you with an email to send. Your emotional layer has some fear about the consequences if the email doesn't go. All this thing, conflict happens, you see. So the process of squeezing, where we remind ourselves that He is the one, He runs this entire universe, then gets us more and more aligned, gets us more and more on the same page so that we collect ourselves in this way and offer ourselves up to God.

Now when we are sitting in the—it's all right to go at this place, I can talk about this—so when we are sitting in the heart chamber quietly, in the heart altar, in the heart temple quietly, then how much of what we are learning can be conceptualized? With me? When you're sitting in the quiet, immersed in the love for God in your heart chamber, is it static or is there growth? You see, you're growing spiritually, you're blooming spiritually. But that growing is—how much of that do you feel intuitively? What is your sense? How much of that can you put in words and conceptualize? What does your heart tell you? You have a sense of this?

Yeah, staying there and keeping very quiet, a couple of things seem to happen. It starts empty, and that emptiness, the sense of great joy and expansion. So it feels like, to use an analogy, crude words, yeah, but you were the fish, you know, you were like a fish, like you associate with the body and the person, and then you suddenly start to feel like actually the ocean, all of it, and that object is within you. So you like everything opens up like everywhere and this still but shining. It's like you're full of light and joy and peace and bliss. And then, you know, you're just, it's like a dimension has opened up, like the body is in the self. So for the first time you recognize that the body is just, it's like a component in the wholeness. We took ourselves to be that, just that little one, but we are the, it seems like the unbounded ocean in which the body is there. And then it helps us to stay there. All the emptiness, if you go very deep, then the body disappears, right? Then you're just like, okay, you know, even you're just the one who always—this ocean was always there, the body was a visitor. Very difficult to put into words.

Yes, yes. So emptiness, very good you brought that out, is the entry condition to this chamber and also gives you the right to remain. Without emptying yourself, or at least without the intention to be empty of yourself, you will not get entry into God's chamber, the chamber of Atma Gyan, the chamber of self-knowledge. But not only is it an entry criteria, it is also the only way in which you can have a right to remain. So when the sages have always told us to abide or to remain in that, if we start to take home things—what is this empty? Empty of what? Empty of the 'me,' empty of conceptual belief, empty of narrative, empty of 'Oh, this is happening to me,' you see. Empty of all of these ideas.

And that is why after we make the prayer, after we have prayed, that is the highest active seeming of action, active seeming of agency that we can apply, isn't it? So prayer: we pray for His grace to show us the light, and then we are empty of even the one who made the prayer. He exhausted every aspect of our apparent capability, and now we are a naked infant at His feet, at His door, at His doorway, hoping to get access to His light, to His love. And when you are inside, how will you know? You cannot know in any worldly way. You only know within that you visited a place that you didn't want to leave. You wanted to stay like that. And over there, what you are learning, how you are growing, most of it cannot be expressed into language, cannot be expressed in words. But without words, intuitively we are able to get an intuitive sense that the flower of our heart is starting to bloom in His love and light.

So the revelation of who we really are, who I really am, and the meaning of unconditional love, compassion, kindness, faith, patience, charity—all of this we only learn the more time we spend in this way. So this is the very crux of spirituality. All paths lead to this point. But nobody can say, 'My path is different, my spiritual path is different, I don't spend time with the spirit.' That cannot be, isn't it? You cannot have a spiritual path without spending time with the spirit.

Bloom in His love and light. So, the revelation of who we really are, who I really am, and the meaning of unconditional love, compassion, kindness, faith, patience, charity—all of this we only learn the more time we spend in this way. So, this is the very crux of spirituality. All paths lead to this point, but nobody can say, 'My path is different; my spiritual path is different. I don't spend time with the spirit.' That cannot be, isn't it? You cannot have a spiritual path without spending time with the spirit. And where is the spirit to be found? In reality, that mind, in reality, everywhere. And yet, there is a designated spot. For as long as there is a sense of duality, there is a designated spot for a rendezvous to happen with God, and that designated spot is in your heart.

Does that mean that He cannot give you other signs on the outside? No, it doesn't mean that. But whichever culture you may come from, whichever religion you may come from, whichever branch of spirituality you may follow, you have been reminded often that His home is in your heart. Kabir Ji doesn't tire of saying it. In every Chalisa, it is there. In every prayer, it is there. If you look at every tradition and religion and spirituality, it is there. So, if you had a designated spot in your house where you could meet God, how much time would you spend there? You'd spend all your time there. But this designated spot, the rendezvous point with God, has to be not too far-fetched because we are so caught up in Maya. And yet, if it was just a point in Maya, then it would defeat its purpose, isn't it? Is it? So, God in His kindness has said, 'Leave all Maya aside for just one micro-moment and you will reach this designated spot.' Otherwise, very soon we may start to take God Himself to be just an object within Maya.

So, although His signs, Her signs, may be visible many times in Maya's alarm clocks pointing us back home, the auspicious, the high place to meet Him is where He has designated it universally. So, we may ask, 'Who am I?' What happens when we ask, 'Who am I?' We're talking about this. The mind may answer, 'You are pure awareness.' Is that the answer we're looking for? Yes, but no, you see. Yes, but not conceptually. Concepts are cheap; they are available everywhere. So, what is it that we can then do to find out who we are? Where can we go? The more we go to the mind, the more we'll get caught up in narratives. If we stay with our emotions, then those emotions will linger and we'll start to label ourselves as fearful or angry or kind or whatever emotion we may be tasting in that moment.

So, to really get insight into who we are, where can we go? The same place. There are not two separate Atmas: one that is the teacher for Jnana Yogis and one that is the Beloved for Bhaktas. That is why Bhagavan said that the two wings of the same bird are Jnana and Bhakti. We learn true love and true insight, true knowledge, Atma and Atma Darshan, at the same place. So, what happens when we stay there with a heartfelt longing to understand the reality of who we are? Our heartfelt prayer to love God deeply and to serve Him alone. We recognize that I am indescribable. I am indescribable in my entirety. I'm speaking on your behalf: you are indescribable in your entirety. But if you were to make some attempts, we can usually say what is not. The 'not' is easier: not changing, not taking birth, not dying, not affected by anything.

And we can say very few positives about it, but some of the positives we can say is that I am aware as awareness itself. I'm the witness as witnessing itself. There is no entity which is doing the witnessing. I am the source of all love, all creation; everything that is perceivable and unperceivable, I am. But to read this or hear it is poles apart from the insight of it. So, the point is to use the hearing to lead us to that insight, for us to remain busy. So, if you wish just to go, 'Who am I? Who am I? Who am I? Who am I? Who am I?' I mean, in God's grace everything is possible, but most likely this is not the best way to approach our inquiry or sadhana. We have to follow the same process: 'Who am I?' And many times when we are just starting it, we have not canceled out everything that we've taken ourselves to be.

So, we go through a process of Manana, of meditation as it is called in the lecture, where we say, 'I'm not this body, I'm not my thoughts, I'm not my feelings. I am aware of them; they are not aware of me. I am aware of that; it is not aware of me.' In that way, we cancel out all the mental propositions, mental positions about who we could be, is it? And after you've done that, what is left to do? And at that point, your repetition of the question 'Who am I?' is only so that you are not getting distracted in solving some other worldly concern. But after you've negated out everything, we come to the same hopeless place, helpless place, where we need God's help, the guidance of the Atma itself, the Satguru within, to reveal the truth of who we are to us.

So, inquiry must also always be done in a prayerful attitude. We cannot force our way to revelation of self-knowledge, to revelation of Atma. So, with innocence and humility, as we continue to inquire, then you enter the same meeting point, the same rendezvous point, which is the point of love but also the point of learning, the point of true knowledge. It cannot be pointed out in any map, this place. You cannot draw longitude and latitude. So, all time which is spent in the guise of spirituality but not in the presence of spirit—in the guise of spirituality but not in the presence of spirit—at best is preparation and at worst is pride.

What I'm saying: at best is preparation because we have to start somewhere. We have to attend the Satsang, we have to read a scripture, we have to see that holy seed in us. Then we have to apply ourselves full-heartedly. And when we realize that it is not in our human capacity to come to self-knowledge or to true love, then we bow down in a surrender to God, wanting His light, wanting His love, so that the revelations in this holy chamber of the heart, where God delights to live, can really happen. Why is all of this needed? Because it should be enough to say, 'God is here.' Okay, God is here, finished. No, but Maya. But me. So, this conceptual idea, for it to become a holy revelation, is the process of spirituality. This—okay, maybe I said this—conceptual idea to become a holy revelation is the process of spirituality. That's why Papaji said, 'Keep quiet.' When I first heard 'Keep quiet,' I was like, 'Okay, this is reminding me of school or something.' It's not outer quiet that he's talking about. So, for all the teachers here, the absence of conceptual belief is the silence that has been spoken about. Yes, please ask.

Yes, Father, please. Hello. On the inquiry... so you said the last time we spoke about to catch up with you about using the inquiry. Yeah. Well, just recently, it was more so if I just sit and just have faith and trust that I am already here, like God is already here, is that okay to do as well as the inquiry? Yes, two different... because somehow it was more the meeting wasn't happening of God, it's more just like... which are these conflicting or are they okay together?

Very good. So, two points I want to say about this. One is that it is very good. You can sense for yourself that which leads you to more humility and quietude, stillness in your heart, you see? If that... so every fruit in spirituality you can taste and check if it is working for you. That is the beauty of this. So, taste it and see if it makes you more open, if it keeps you humble, if it allows you to stay in that heart temple for longer, then it is good. But if it distracts you and you start thinking about other things and it's not really... you don't feel good about it in your heart, then discard it. There's so many things which are available to us for us to use.

The second thing is that the meeting not happening, we can only say after at least maybe five years, ten years, that kind of time frame. We cannot expect it to be, 'Oh, I just started this a few weeks back, few months back, and then the highest revelation should just naturally happen.' It may happen; everything is possible in His grace. But I'm just saying the level of patience that is needed is that we have to make ourselves available to Him and learn to empty ourselves of ourselves for a long period of time before we can start to despair or wonder why it is not working. Because why? Because the process itself is transformative to our life. The process of it. It is not that, okay, you said, 'Ram, Ram, Ram' and boom, boom, boom, Ram Ji, you know, I got Darshan of Lord immediately. What will happen? We'll become very proud. We'll become like Ravana very quickly. He's just like, 'Oh, first time I called Ram, He was here. Now who should I call next?' You see? We become very, very proud.

So, the timing of it only He knows best. But in His grace, in His mercy, sometimes I've seen this so often that He gives the gift first and then wants us to do the work. But we don't realize it that way. Many of us have had spiritual experiences very, very early coming to Satsang. Many times the first meeting itself, you feel like you had the highest insight. It can feel like that, you see? But then what happens after a few hours, days, weeks, months? Then either pride starts to set in or you feel like you had it but you lost it. And that is very troublesome. And then the rest of your spiritual life you are chasing it, like chasing the dragon, chasing that same experience again. But the teacher needs to tell you that sometimes God, because God loves you so much, He gives you the gift in advance. It doesn't mean that you are not to surrender yourself continuously more and more, let go of your pride more and more, empty yourself of the 'me' more and more, become more faithful, patient, courageous on this path.

So, He knows the curriculum and what is needed at what point the best. But I'm just saying that because I picked up on that point about the meeting is not happening, we cannot despair about that until at least long, long periods of time have gone past. And the second thing is that know that He is there whether He is palpable or not.

I feel like that's something in the past that I wasn't... I didn't have that faith there, maybe.

Exactly. And that feels like it's very important to have. This is a great leap from not having that faith to having that faith. And that faith could be because my teacher told me He is there and I trust him or her. So, then I will sit inward-facing, antarmukhi, come what may, because he has told me or she has told me that He is there. I don't need her to show me a sign. I don't need her to even reveal herself in some way that I can confirm, you see? The very value of faith is that it is not rational and it cannot be confirmed through some perceptual phenomenal experience. So, it is music to my ears when you say that now I have faith in this, earlier I did not. That I have faith that all I have to do is follow and I know that He is aware, He knows everything that I'm doing, all my longing for Him, all my love for Him, every step that I take towards Him, He is aware of that. And that needs faith.

Because in the meanwhile, while all this is happening inside, what is happening outside? All kinds of drama, all kinds of things: people, conflict, money, body, you know, everything is just in this whirlpool of sensation. You see, there are so many stories playing out that as we are deepening in this story of surrender and love and insight with God in our heart, on the outside there seems to be so much happening. But to remember that this inward is reality, and in relation to this reality, all that happens on the outside is unreality. I'm saying in relation to; we don't have to... there is no way to actually say how much reality, how much unreality. But compared to the reality of God's presence and His truth as the highest, the world play of appearances at least in relational terms is completely unreal. So, we don't have to say it's a dream or it's not.

On the outside, there seems to be so much happening, you see. But to remember that this inward is reality, and in relation to this reality, all that happens on the outside is unreality. I'm saying 'in relation to.' There is no way to actually say how much reality, how much unreality, but compared to the reality of God's presence and His truth as the highest, the world play of appearances, at least in relational terms, is completely unreal. So we don't have to say it's a dream or it's not a dream, but I'm just saying that in relation to what can be found within yourself, that which is outside is just dream-like. At least with me, then that whole debate about saying it's an illusion or it's reality is over. In relation to God, it is unreality, yeah.

But many times, because it is not necessarily something that you can see and you can testify to, then it needs a lot of faith. And that is why, in the eyes of the world, most of us will always seem like we are fools holding on to this idea of self-knowledge, Atma Gyan, or love for God—for a God that in His highest is without any attributes. For the world, which is chasing all attributes and pleasure and taste and gratification constantly, the brahmananda—which is the attributeless Ananda without having to taste anything, there is bliss—that brahmananda sounds stupid. It sounds pointless. It sounds like just a stupid, absurd, silly idea, is it? But we cannot rest. Whether in this lifetime or after a million lifetimes, we will only come to rest in brahmananda, the Ananda of Nirguna Brahman itself. Till then, all these tastes of the world will only seem transitory. We may seem to enjoy them for a while, but then they will lose their taste.

Maybe I would like to be more... have you seen me? I'm not at all sometime... how do you mean? In faith, yeah. Like, and...

That will come. That will come more and more. Because if you've gone from next to no faith to now to be able to say even that 'I need faith,' I recognize what faith is itself is growth in faith. And that faith will only keep growing. There's no question. When you meet God and that there's nothing else, nowhere else you want to be, there's no question.

But it's the in-between. That time, yeah. In-between that time, maybe I just feel like I'd like to be more motivated, more like driven.

Well, you know, usually these things like motivation don't work in spirituality. What works is more inspiration. You are inspired. You read some holy words from a sage or a scripture and you feel inspired to contemplate yourself, to go deep within yourself, you see. The Rajas stuff usually wears out and doesn't get anywhere because the Rajas stuff needs some phenomenal tasting, otherwise it just seems pointless. So it's like, 'I'm very motivated to do the inquiry or to pray,' but that motivation needs to constantly be fed with experiences and you see something like an idea of progress. Whereas the path of inquiry is a dissolving. We're losing more and more of our stories and what we thought we were. So it's more a path of inspiration rather than motivation. Don't worry about that too much. You get a sense of what I'm saying? It's good. Sometimes you get a lot of—if you're saying enthusiasm, that is good. You get a lot of enthusiasm to study, to contemplate, to read, to pray. All that enthusiasm we must use in the best way. But motivation usually is tied to a goal or a target or becoming something. That's... don't. And it makes us a little constricted and makes us many times also very like wanting to win first. But all of that is not at all needed in the spiritual path.

So, on doctor's advice, I'm just going to pause my video and audio for some time. Just going to walk around for two, three minutes and I'll come right back. Yes.

Hello. So suppose that you had six months where you've been very good with your sadhana, you've been sitting quietly, you've been in the heart temple, but you're not getting anything that you can claim, you can proclaim. You're not getting any evidence of spiritual growth outwardly. What to do? That is where faith is needed. That's why I'm saying it's a question of years and decades, not a question of days and weeks and months. And be careful of building any pride on the gifts that He has given us beforehand. Have to be careful that we don't get caught up in any self-glorification because all, as we have seen, after a point we come to the end of our seeming capability. Only He in His grace gifts us with that which is valuable. Everything that is valuable in the world only comes from Him. So what is there for us to be proud about? Nothing at all.

So even if it takes weeks, months, years, don't get disheartened. Don't lose hope. Just follow. And also never claim that you have come to the end of this journey or climbed the top of this mountain. God is immeasurable and the amount He reveals Himself will keep deepening, ever deepening, ever growing. So you never have to say that, 'Okay, I'm done now. I'm done.' A beginner mindset is very important. Wake up fresh every day as if you have had no spiritual experience and you understand nothing in spirituality. That'll keep you fresh to meet fresh God.

Sometimes some children ask me that, 'Father, why are you reading all of this and you're getting so excited about it?' Some of you know I get excited and I'm really getting so excited. 'But don't you know this? Isn't this already your experience? Why are you getting so...' And the thing is that we have to meet it fresh. We have to meet it like little children, beginners. Because every moment meeting with God is possible. And whatever was the trigger for that, whatever inspired us for that meeting to happen, we have to be grateful and excited about that. If we lead our life in a very jaded way thinking, 'Oh this, oh this I already know. Oh this, this I spoke about so many years back,' you can't live like that. You just have to... then this world itself becomes our sadhana.

Somebody tells us something... somebody said to me the other day, she is not in Satsang, nothing, she has no real... she's not strongly in any spiritual path or anything. She says, 'Every day I just try to become a zero for God.' And I said that's just stunningly beautiful, you see. So beautiful coming from somebody who's not even what you would call a spiritual person. Just... I said, 'What is it that you do to be in touch with God?' She says, 'I just try to become a zero for Him every day.' Touched me so much. So then life itself, if you meet with the innocence of a child, then keeps reminding you to turn to God, keeps reminding you. But if you go with positions and 'Oh, but I know so much, I've done this, I've done that,' then you lose your true spirituality. You lose that innocence which is very needed for the spiritual path. You must never lose this innocence. The minute we start saying 'I,' is the downward trend. Everything is only God's grace. He's putting these words in my mouth. He has written all the books that have been written. Everything is only Him. All the experiences He only gives. So if you retain that freshness, the innocence of a child, then you're on a safe path. The minute you start to take positions, and you have to be careful of these because they subtly grow on us, subtly keep growing on us.

Okay, let me bring some attention to those online and let me hear the reports a bit. Okay, let's go to Georgie.

Hello, hello. Um, you can hear me okay? Yeah, you will. Okay. It's not really a like now, but I raised my hand because I have been feeling for some time disconnected from your words in Satsang. And it's really hard for me to bring this up, but I just... I felt if I just come to you with this, it's better.

Is it everything or some parts of it?

Well, there have been a few Satsangs lately where maybe we read something and then you gave us silences, so we contemplated together and you guided the contemplation. Those were the ones that went deepest. But then others were... it's different. Then, yeah, I feel trying not to say lame or... actually, I talked about this with recently and I felt very arrogant after speaking. So that's why, yeah, I'm trying to be careful because I don't want to be arrogant.

Don't, don't. So this is true in a way that I'm not expecting that every Satsang will resonate as much as every other Satsang would. And because everyone's conditioning is different, there are some things which are more applicable to some and some things which are less applicable to some. So it is bound to happen that some Satsangs give us more juice for spiritual insight and contemplation and some Satsangs don't seem to give us as much. That's all right. That's also to be given. I have no expectation that any of my children will love every Satsang as much or equally. And it could even be for prolonged periods of time. And many times, I mean, God alone knows why these things happen. Maybe it is to deepen our patience, to deepen our faith. It could be to make us humble, keep us humble. It could be many things.

Yeah, because I feel that your most... sorry, what is the most irritating thing that you don't enjoy at all? Irritating? No, it's more like... the difference is... please stop me if I sound arrogant, but the difference is it's more of you speaking about Satsang recently in contrast with for the first few years of being with you where you were more guiding us to contemplating or to contemplation either together or in conversation. And I feel maybe that's the difference during Satsang. But then there is also a very undeniable, deep enriching because of the ideas and prayer and the Satsang has intensified and has deepened and is more full of love and faith. And it brings more clear of the qualities of God. It brings them more easily to be experienced. So there is also that side, yeah, of the zones, yeah.

So a few weeks back I mentioned that Satsangs are going to become more and more boring. I have this sense that because of two reasons: one is that I am completely more and more of any sort of performative spirituality where I'm trying to force your attention or impress you in any way—or not you, but in general anyone in any way—just as innocently as simply as possible, just share what is appearing in my heart. And many times that does not seem so compelling. But and the mind can get very bored also in that process. But I know you and I know so many of my children that you may get frustrated from time to time. Things may seem very slow. The silences of contemplation, some like you say you're enjoying, others may be getting really irritated saying, 'Why can't we just move on faster and what's really happening?'

But so really, I'm predicting that as we go along, Satsang will be quite boring and slow, things like that. My hope, of course, is that your love for God and because of your love for God, your love for His foolish servant Ananta is so much that you will transcend this boredom and lack of enjoyment or lack of even sometimes a lack of apparent progress outwardly happening in your spirituality, and you will stay the path. That is my hope and my prayer, of course. But if there's feedback in terms of what we can change or make different, I'm very open to that. But given that my attempt really is to just become a transparent filter for God to share, and I will be driven mostly from there. But I've also seen that when feedback comes, some attention and some things go to that. So I'm happy to receive feedback from all my children at any point. But know that clearly my current... maybe it'll be helpful for all of you to know what I'm currently working on for myself, and I know some of you know, but maybe it's to reiterate it a bit. One is, of course, you know that I'm working on anger. Anger has not erupted in a strong way for quite some time. It still comes from time to time in the form...

When feedback comes, some attention and some things go to that. So I'm happy to receive feedback from all my children at any point. But know that clearly, my current—maybe it'll be helpful for all of you to know what I'm currently working on for myself, and I know some of you know, but maybe it's to reiterate it a bit. One is, of course, you know that I'm working on anger. Anger has not erupted in a strong way for quite some time. It still comes from time to time in the form of irritation, but I'm working on that irritation also. And I have the sense—you have to check with people around me—but I have the sense that that is also reducing. And that, in a way, is a deepening of faith in God's justice and lessening of faith in my ability to tell right from wrong using the tools of my mind and intellect. So to trust more deeply in His way, His justice, is helping me reduce anger, irritation, these things which were there much more a few years back.

The second thing is that I don't like Ananta interfering in satsang, you see, which might sound a bit strange to all of you. Because there's a human condition here, especially when something has been done for so many years, then it makes certain grooves. There are certain ways in which some answers seem very effective, so it sort of becomes like a role play because of past conditioning, which I don't want to operate from that place at all. And I don't want to operate from the pretense of being a teacher. I want only the Atma to use this body as freely as possible. And in the words of the Atma, sometimes it conveys the teacher-hood, then that is fine. But if it ever comes from this stupid man called Ananta, then that is not acceptable to me. I don't want to take any position; I want to just dissolve more and more in God's love. So I started to notice that in the human play, this Ananta can start becoming a bit performative, you see, a bit like performance-oriented when sharing satsang. So I'm trying to work on that and not share from any elevated sort of pedestal. So just coming from these projects which I'm working on at the moment, maybe sometimes things will seem a bit like dry or dull, and I just pray for your patience and blessings that all of us continue on this path together and, by God's grace, maybe keep deepening in His love and light.

I pray for the same, that whatever it is that I'm feeling towards this is not stronger than my faith and my devotion. Very good. I've also started, about a month ago, I started reading 'I Am That' from the beginning. I never read the full book, so I wanted to read the whole thing.

Yes, shout out to you. It's very, very good. I'm very happy to do some contemplations with 'I Am That'. I feel like some of the passages there, some interactions in that book, are so beautiful and explosive, and to contemplate them together will be really good. So I'm happy to. There are so many things, of course, I know which are pending for us to contemplate as well, and I hope some of you have been studying them by yourself as well. But 'I Am That', or some passages from 'I Am That'—and there's some other books by Maharaj also, one is called 'Seeds of Consciousness', if I'm getting the name right, which is very, very potent as well. There's a book that Ramesh had written called 'Pointers from Nisargadatta Maharaj' or something like that, which is also very potent. So there's a whole world to explore when it comes to Maharaj's teachings. The essence of it, of course, being to remain with the sense of I-amness and the revelation happening in remaining with that sense of I-amness.

Thank you. Thank you for sharing. Love you.

Love you too. Okay, let's go to morning.

Thank you. Can you hear me, Father? Thank you. I felt a little bit nervous coming up. I haven't... and yeah, I wanted somehow... what I wanted to bring, I could see it as a thought, or it's very hard to stay empty. Like when you say to come to the place of the empty, I have to admit, like, yes, it feels difficult even though that's most of the time what I'm trying. But yes, I have to expose that it is very difficult.

So nowhere am I giving anyone this idea—and correct me if it happened that way—that if I make it sound as if it is easy, then that would be undermining Maya more than she deserves to be undermined. She's a very powerful force, and she fights with all her might to prevent us from going and sitting empty in His holy presence. In fact, her whole design, her whole—we can say God's design for Maya—is for Maya to really test our faith. For Maya to really test our faith because it is the most difficult to remain empty with God when there are so many things that are happening in the world. In every part of the world, in the whole bigger world, in our family, in our satsangs, there is always so much happening, you see. So to remain empty in the heart takes work every day, every day. And it takes—that's why I've been stressing on this point of two to four hours is what it needs me to do every day if I'm going to say that I spend most of my time in God's holy presence. And may I never be arrogant to say that, 'No, no, I'm sorted; all of this guidance is only for all of you.' It is not true.

So it is difficult, and that is why it needs that two hours to four hours every day. Because you notice that if you've gone a day or two without the intention to spend that kind of time with God every day, then it becomes more and more difficult, more and more difficult. Sometimes, of course, Divinity inspires us; we may see something and that brings us deeply in. But the more time we spend away from God, the more reasonable that seems. The more time we spend away from God, the more rational, reasonable, acceptable that seems, isn't it? It's only when we return again do we realize that, 'Ah, that is a month that is gone, that is three months that have gone, that is six months that have gone.' Because when we are in the flow of just Maya, it doesn't seem like we are wasting time. And we break out of that flow and we return—first we find it very difficult to return. That's why I'm saying don't take breaks in your sadhana. In whatever path you have, stick with it. Even on the days which are very difficult, those are very important days to go through. But keep up your intention, your attempt to be with Him unceasingly. And to be with Him unceasingly needs at least two to four hours of focused effort every day. So don't—I'm completely with you on this. It is not easy.

I can also tell, I don't know what you're saying, it's that it gets difficult and definitely more acceptable because... and yes, somehow a state of, I don't know, normalizing exactly. And the worst thing—I don't know if it's the worst thing—but it's like even though I'm trying and not succeeding, it's like down-falling. I don't know.

We keep normalizing our life and time spent in Maya. We keep normalizing it with the narratives that Maya itself weaves for us. And after a while, we may seem like, 'Oh, I was being stupid to spend so much time in prayer or in inquiry; I have to focus on my life and building my life,' this kind of stuff. And then when we return, either through a slap or either through some divine inspiration, when we return, we realize how much time has really been wasted.

I don't know where exactly this is coming from, but like in my heart, could I come to Bangalore as soon as possible? Like if there is any chance?

Yes, yes. There is full openness from here and full welcoming from here. You're very welcome to come as soon as you can. You can. Because I feel a little bad that some children are here from long distances and my body is so unpredictable that we need to announce on the same day if satsang will be possible or not. So that is the only thing that I feel. I look at some of you that are here traveling from long distances, and I know that there have been so many breaks in satsang. But know that I'm praying for you so deeply in my heart, and may God hear those prayers, and may the purpose of all of your visits be fulfilled by your deepening love for God, deepening relationship with God. But you're very welcome to come.

Thank you. Yeah, in my heart there is nothing else I have to say than thank you.

So how is it going on the focused attention to God?

Very much distracted. Like, if something... I'm vivid what you're saying, and somehow the only time when I can honestly say when I'm empty is when watching satsang. And then I'm trying to sit and it gets very difficult in the way because, on the one hand, I know how important you say it's important to follow God's will, but it's not exactly clear at this point when it's coming from the mind or when it's coming from the heart. So it's like I'm trying to be empty, and maybe now saying it, I have to maybe put a start time watch for myself in this way. Because it's like, on one hand, I know how you say it's important for God's will and in a way to be open, but then it's not clear if now it's okay, now this is called for something to do, or it's a distraction.

Well, it's a good topic because if our intention really is to follow God's will—I cannot report that about this one for sure, but I don't feel like I can ever meet anyone who can truly say that, 'I follow God's will more than 90% of my life,' but I don't spend more than two hours in prayer or in inquiry every day. Because to meet God's will itself, to have faith in God's will, to really even recognize what He wants out of us in that day, in that moment, in that hour, needs an intimacy of presence with God. Being present with God, which is very, very deeply held, very, very deeply strong. So if your project is to follow God's will all the time, then everything else in spirituality will be taken care of, you see, because you will seem lost to God's will unless you're spending time in His presence. Yes, like we cannot fathom His will unless we spend time in His presence. And this is the God's will that we have to follow, not the universal will which is unfolding everything anyway, which is His will, which is the broader will like the frame of this movie. But within this movie, it is our job to come to servitude of God, to follow His will, His command. But to even know what His will is needs us to be empty of ourselves, empty of our own will at least, and to meet Him in a very naked way. And only then can we even think about saying that I'm living in God's will.

Yes. Yeah, to be honest, with at least a little bit of integrity, the will is here, but at this moment I would say honestly, because there is not the real sense except maybe now like spending time with you in this way... the capability of... I'm fooling myself a little bit of following God's will. Please correct me, but in this way, I have nothing but the intention.

Yeah, so that intention has to translate into application every day, every moment for all of us. So just trying to stay empty at least.

Yes. Yeah, I know that you say 'just', but 'just' is not that easy is what we started with.

But yes, but that's it. Because without being empty of ourselves, our own individual will, our own individual desire, what we want, we can never fathom His will in our hearts. So just trying to let every thought go if possible. So okay, let's zero in on this a bit. Because at least in our lineage, every teacher, every sage has made it clear that simply what we need to do is not identify with our thoughts, especially with our next thought, you see. Then what makes it so difficult? All that—what do I need to do? I just need to not identify with my next thought. But the 'just' is not just the 'just', you see. It's like we...

We can never fathom His will in our hearts, so just trying to let every thought go if possible. Yeah, so okay, let's zero in on this a bit because at least in our lineage, every teacher, every sage has made it clear that simply what we need to do is not identify with our thoughts, especially with our next thought, you see? Then what makes it so difficult? All that, 'What do I need to do? I just need to not identify with my next thought.' But the 'just' is not just the 'just,' you see? It's like, we talked about the Power of Now. Sometimes the Power of Now came out maybe 15, maybe 20 years back, and it was such a beautiful book. It was one of the books that I read end to end and then read end to end immediately after I finished the first time. And it felt clear: all I need to do is live in the now. Is it? But so many millions probably have read the book; why are they not able to follow? Just live in the now? Because everything is connected. Everything is needed. Faith is needed, patience is needed, courage is needed. The more we do it, the more these things grow.

Why all of this? The answer is Maya. The Maya will give you ways where you can pretend to be empty. Maya will give you ways where you can pretend to be living in the now, is it? Holding on to the position of being in the now, actually not living in the now but seeming like you are. All the sages have told us all you have to do is just be. What can be simpler than that? Just be. But who can do it? Hardly anybody. Everybody knows it, but to just be in the absence of desire, not to identify with anything else, not to pick up these things—so it's a full... there is no bypassing the full spiritual path. And the difficulty in it, only God's grace can help us along the way. But it's a modern sort of presumption of spiritual path and ease coming together. It is not there historically in any tradition. It's a modern self-help type spirituality; it made us believe that this is a path of ease. It is not a path of ease, at least not in the lives of the authentic sages that we read about or hear about. Nobody says it was so easy. So don't expect that. It is difficult because Maya makes it seem very difficult.

But even when you're speaking now, I can hear your voice and on one level it's true, like, please help me. When you say stay now, I can't. The thought came, 'I cannot even stay in the now.' It's like all of this, to let go of now if possible.

Look at the instruction. Some of the instruction sounds so simple: all you have to do is just constantly be in the now, or just be, or to just fully surrender your life. Just surrender everything. Like, as a concept it's so easy. I just have to surrender, just live in a ruthless trust of God, abandon myself fully to Him. And upon hearing this, we get inspired and maybe for a few days we stay inspired, you see? But Maya, she comes. Something happens. Something happened, something, something, either as a thought or in our life, that puts us back in. So that is when, when Maya is tempting us, that is when our faith is tested, our patience is tested, our courage is tested. So all of us have to go through these. All of us have to go through these tests.

Somebody's calling me on WhatsApp. So, in the process of going through these tests, then it happens like a phone call can come like this, you see? And somebody can... you don't know what's going to be heard on the other end. And upon hearing that, you may just feel like this world is so real. For a few days you may be out of your holy place that we spoke about. So it is not easy. So all of us must remember, not with pride but with humility, that the project that we have embarked on—to live in the presence of God, to live in His will, and to find an eternal place at His holy feet, whether we call that as union or self-recognition which is eternal—we have embarked on the most difficult journey in the human condition. It is not easy at all.

The feel, I must say, unbearable, not being able to stay at least empty. Empty, I don't know, but you can't.

It's because to stay empty is the difficulty in this difficult project. It is the very difficulty. So when you say, 'Even at least that much I should be able to do,' but that is the maximum that is being asked of you. Everything leads to that. The rest is God's doing. The revelation is only God's doing. The growing of love is only God's doing. The deepening of insight is only God's doing. What is being asked of us is to follow the teacher's pointings and to remain empty using the help of those pointings. That's the extent of it. So when you... something is, your mind is tricking you there: 'I should at least be able to stay empty.' But that is the most which is being asked of you. The rest is only for God to do. Even this is, you know, that everything ultimately is His will, so even this is for Him to do. But this very often becomes a sort of excuse so we don't play our part in this play, in this Leela.

So that's why I'm not getting into that at all. I'm saying that our part in this deal is to become empty of ourselves by letting go of our narratives, either through prayer or through inquiry. So that if you say, 'I've just started and I'm able to stay empty for these many minutes every day,' then you've not just started; you've come to the extent of what any of us can do. So somewhere your mind is tricking you and making you frustrated by saying that, 'Oh, you should at least be able to remain empty.' The one who prevents you from remaining empty is now frustrating you saying, 'Yes, you know?' So that is the trickery of the mind. Because if you can stay empty, then Master Bankei's words: all things are perfectly resolved. It is the very Unborn that he's speaking of.

To be honest, I don't know, but there seems to be so much trickery. At least I don't...

Yeah, that's why you have to just moment to moment, thought by thought, pray it away or inquire it away or remind yourself to be empty of it and surrender it away, you see? All the tools are available to you. It's just a question of application in the moment, not the broader scheme of things. Many times we are in pain, so we take a medicine which fixes it. In the broader scheme of things of our life, I want to fix it for a few months, a few weeks, a few years, or forever if I can, instead of fixing it this moment, this moment, this moment, this moment, you see? So this whole game is this moment. You see? So don't get into the broader. Can you be empty right now, this moment? You can, you can, you can, you can, can, can. That's all that's needed, you see? That's all that's needed.

So the click is a tool, the prayer is a tool, the inquiry is a tool, the reminder to be empty is a tool. Every spiritual path is a tool leading to this holy emptiness. It is unexplainable. So remember that all you have to do is... it's about this moment. And even that is difficult. So stop expecting ease will make it easier for you. Firstly, stop expecting ease will make it easier for you, and then shorten the time span to right now, right now, right now, right.

Yes, and if they let it go, the actions still can continue and everything?

Yeah, just hold... everything else can still continue. Don't hold, don't grasp at anything at all. Yeah, even in this conversation. You've been in satsang long enough to know that for a long period of time my emphasis was just in sharing: remain open and empty. Remember? Yes, fully. So two things happened as a result of that. I mean, some good things also happened, but two things which were unexpected also happened because of that. Some got into a false idea that they were always open and empty, which is not true, you see? Because the mind itself started reporting that they are so empty, and a sort of pride started to kick in. And the second thing that happened is that any sort of practice, any sort of love, faith, deepening devotion, bhakti—all of this, some of the children started feeling like they are beyond, they're above all of these things. So that really happened.

So I realized, and by God's grace, Kabir Ji, Tulsidas Ji, Goswami Rai, all this inspiration started showing up in my life more and more. So I realized that I need to emphasize on this aspect of the message so much more than I had been in the past, because otherwise it is leading to some sort of Advaita pride, Advaita sort of position-making. And the true authentic deepening in love for God, true deepening in insight and therefore leading to awakening, was not really happening as much as I felt it should somewhere. And by God's grace, the message has been made broader, far-reaching, and sometimes irritating. I do understand that sometimes we just want the direct way, you see? But we have to follow the way that God is guiding us to move as a family, guiding this expression to move. So this is how my heart feels right to share at this time, and I feel we are on the right track, as difficult as it may be.

You know, as some of you may remember, but for a while when it came to me to share in satsang, 'Don't just don't believe your next thought,' I felt like that's it, we have solved it. We have solved spirituality, that's it. How stupid, foolish, naive, proud boy, you know? But at least the intention was hopefully true, that I wanted to provide everyone a simple way to come to self-knowledge, to come to Atma Gyan. And I feel like once I give this as a solution to everyone, you'll just be able to follow. What's so difficult? Just don't believe your next thought. Then I realized that to follow is not as straightforward as it may seem to me, you see? And to get that feedback, I have to learn from what my children are showing me. And so the message from that point kept broadening.

How do I make it easier for all of you not to believe your next thought? How do I show you how to inquire more deeply? How to show you the play of attention and belief, the mechanics of it? So we spent a long time on all of this. And then I felt like so many pointers of this way, where in my pride I felt like, 'That's it, all my children will be sorted now.' That's it. See, 'open and empty' of course was a pointer like that where I felt like it's so simple to follow, why can't we just moment to moment follow being open and empty? And I realized that difficulties are coming and maybe more pride is coming than actual insight. So what is missing? What is missing? So God keeps showing the way, and this is where we are at the moment. And my faith, my feeling very deeply in my heart, is that if my intention is pure and if I want to share His love, then He will not lead us down a garden path. He will keep us on the right track.

So after 'don't believe your next thought' didn't work for my children, I realized that I'm not going to talk about this path being easy for anyone. So if you visit satsang from 10, 12 years back, I used to say, 'Look, I know attention is a difficult instrument to deal with.' Some of you remember. I know attention is difficult because if I say don't give attention, more attention will go to that. But belief is so simple; just don't believe your next thought. That's all, you see? So I used to keep emphasizing that. Then I got a beautiful shock because—I won't take her name, but this child, very sweet—she was with me six months. She came, and very few people used to come, and almost every day I used to say, 'Just don't believe your next thought.' Then when she had to go back home, she was saying bye to me after being here hearing me every day for six months. When she's saying bye to me, she was sitting down here, I was just looking into her eyes. I told her, 'My child, just don't worry. All you have to do is not believe your next thought.' And she lost her cool! Can you believe it? She was like, 'Ananta, this is the one thing I don't like!' I said, 'Today you're telling me after six months?' When it's time for you to go, I felt like you're really getting it in the six months because you heard me every day talk about this for six months. Now it is time to leave for your plane and you say that, 'I can't do this, I can't!'

Sitting down here, I was just looking into her eyes. I told her, 'My child, just don't worry. All you have to do is not believe your next thought.' And she lost her cool, can you believe it? She was like, 'Ananta, this is the one thing I don't like.' I said, 'Today you're telling me, after six months, when it's time for you to go?' I felt like you're really getting it in the six months because you heard me every day talk about this for six months. Now it is time to leave for your plane and you say that, 'I can't do this. I can't understand what you mean. What you mean, don't believe your next thought?'

And I was feeling like I've made it so simple, so clear for everyone, you see? So life shows us that what may seem so simple and applicable for you to do is not necessarily that way for everyone. And we must see what God is trying to show us, and we must deepen in our expression, in our devotion to God to guide us more and more. Maybe some pride was setting in here where I felt like, 'Wow, I have such a great pointer to give everyone,' something like that. So it really helps with keeping us humble, keeping us humble on this path.

Time, okay. I have to be very strict about my timing because when I'm not strict about my timing, then I end up canceling. So it's better that I'm strict about the timing and we keep meeting twice a week with my Satguru's permission, rather than stretching it on these days and then having to cancel. So if you'll allow me to be precise, a little more precise than usual with the timing, that will be helpful. Thank you for, thank you.

Is it possible to come?

Yes, okay. I will look into it. Thank you, thank you. It's very possible, very much. Thank you, thank you. Pranam.