God Is Alive in You, Right Now - 1st January 2024

So we can come to this awakening experience or realization or recognition. But if the experience were just like those lights—they came suddenly, oh, that's an experience—so you're looking for some inner fireworks to happen, you see? And you say, 'Okay, does that mean that that experience proves that I found God?' Is it? So what is the type of experience we are looking for? What must you find so that you can confirm, 'Okay, now this means I have found God'? It is not from that. God is not different from me, myself, you see. But who is the self and how will we know?

So I don't want you to believe; I want you to come to insight, to recognition. But will it be recognition like this? You perceive something and it goes, you see? It comes and it goes. Will it be recognition like that? So what is the difference? And this point itself most spiritual seekers are not in tune with. Most spiritual seekers are not looking for reality in this way, and that's why they get stuck. Many have been on the path for many, many decades, still searching for God. And it is said that God is here. God is your own self. It is said that one goes looking for God, they find themselves; one goes looking for themselves, they find God. So to find yourself can't be that complicated, can it? Where did you lose yourself that we now have to find it?

Okay, so let's start with how it's not possible to do this project. What are the tools that are needed and which tools will not work? So what if I said to you that forget about all the experiences from the senses, all sensory perception, just leave them aside. Possible? Let them appear and disappear, but don't give them any value, any importance. And one perception for sure, which is the appearance of thought, which comes as a single-line message in the mind—let that come and let that go. This is also perception; we can leave it aside. Now, is there something that you can confirm without using these instruments of thought and perception, that you're here?

I'm here.

Okay, she says, 'I'm here.' But this 'I am' which is here, is that the body? Because for to confirm that the body is here, you need perception. To confirm that you are here, what do you need? Do you know without perception that you're here? And 'here' means what? You mean here in this room? Because that also needs perception. You're perceiving a room. If your eyes are closed, if your hearing stops, all this goes away, then no room. So what is this 'hereness' that we are speaking of? A sense of existence, a sense of being. How many can confirm this? Only one? The one who reported also, but that was peer pressure. How many can't confirm this? A hereness or a beingness without using any perception? This is very key, very important. Confirm?

No. Yes.

Very stoic right now. You told us to forget about perception, you can't hear your question at all. It's uncomfortable. But this point is critical because we are in spirituality. Spirituality means the presence of, huh, spirit. The presence of spirit, the presence of being. Everything that does not put focus on this presence of God—and I'll make the connection that is not so clear—on this presence of God is not spirituality because it's not about the spirit. It's not about the Atma. So this presence which some of you are saying you can confirm is the presence of Atma, is the presence of spirit. And when this world dissolves, when this world goes away, when this lump of flesh falls off, then that Atma is what remains.

And even when this world is here, at least appears to be here, to not find this presence and to not live in it is to experience the world as a living hell with fear and suffering and regret and guilt and pride and worry and anxiety and past and future. That's why I call it living a zombie life. If you lead a Godless life, if you lead a life which is empty of recognition of the Atma within, then what is, then where is the life? What is life? Surely carrying around a bucket of flesh, taking it to be myself from birth to death, cannot be what we call life.

So this is my provocation for all of you: don't continue to live a life where you take yourself to be the ego, which is the body-mind, or you're living in some conceptual idea or belief system about God, because all these beliefs will also go away when you die. There is an opportunity for direct insight. There's an opportunity for self-realization, and that must become primary in your life. And that is why this is not a discourse; it is a satsang, the company of the truth, to be in the presence of truth. It's not just a belief that you have. If I told all of you, 'Yes, yes, you are now in the company of the truth, just believe it,' would that quench our thirst? Would that satiate us? It wouldn't, if it was just a belief. So we have to come to it in reality.

And this game is all about time. Most want to come to truths, or at least their version of it, while they are still alive. Most don't do it because the mind tricks them every day. How many of us wake up every morning and say, 'I have to find God today'? Good. Okay, most of us don't do that. Most of the world doesn't do that. Why? Because we have other things to do, other tasks to finish, accomplish. Is it possible to make God your top priority while the worldly activities can still function? Or are we going to wait till we are supposedly done with all our responsibilities, which seem to never get done, and then say, 'Now my life is for God'? And it is too late. It doesn't happen.

I've seen that. I lost my father and my father-in-law last year. But did they not have the intention to find God or find the truth? They did have it. They read a lot of books. They prayed—like my father-in-law prayed a lot, my father read a lot—but because it never became central for them, this life was spent without truly living in God's light, in God's presence. Why? Because everyone thinks they have more time. And the mind tells you, your family tells you, everybody tells you, 'There's time for all this. What's the rush?' But does anyone tell you how much time it needs to find God so that you can ration it away and say, 'Okay, these many years I will keep for that'?

And we don't have to become sadhus. That's not what I'm saying. Some husbands and wives are also here today, so I don't want to scare them. You don't have to become sadhus. This life is also not a sadhu life; it's a householder life. All that can happen if you put your focus on Him. You don't have to worry about anything in your life because He is literally the light of this universe. There is nothing that is hidden from Him. Does this mean that we have a cheat code then to life, that, 'Oh, I want a billion dollars, I want a private island, I want the best relationship, I want the body which is a Mr. Universe or something like that, and all I have to do is just surrender to God and tathastu'? Like that? It is not that. But there is nobody who has turned to God and had to scamper for their needs, for anything that they actually needed.

So Nanak Ji said, 'What worries do the fish have? They swim about in the sea and somehow food appears.' And Jesus said, 'What worries do the birds have?' They don't have a five-year—I'm paraphrasing now—they don't have a five-year plan. They have nests, but they don't have nest eggs. They fly every day and who feeds them? They live in trust. And if you look back at our life, you will see that He has always provided for us whatever was needed. So there is no reason to continue to live in the zombie-like fashion. There's no reason to live in this zombie-like fashion because even in this life, once surrendered to Him, you have nothing to worry. Nobody has come to the realization of the Self and regretted it. Yeah, I know I told you so. Whatever needed will be provided for. Nobody has come to the realization of the Self and said, 'Oh no, that's it. I should have gone for the money instead. I should have gone for better relationships instead.' Any of the ones on the walls like that?

Determination. Determination.

Need to follow that intention every moment. But they came to the recognition of the reality of God's presence, of God and the Absolute. And this must not be a rarity. It's a misunderstanding that to come to God's presence is a rarity in the sense that it's not something that becomes impossible for us. The mind will tell you it is too difficult. The mind will say it is too difficult for you. But I promise you that if a fool like this one can be graced by His presence, then anyone can. And I truly mean it when I say that all of you are so much more sincere than this one ever was. But you put the mental blocks in your way. So, how to not value this realm of perceptions that we...

Understanding that to come to God's presence is a rarity in the sense that it's not something that becomes impossible for us. The mind will tell you it is too difficult. The mind will say it is too difficult for you, but I promise you that if a fool like this one can be graced by His presence, then anyone can. And I truly mean it when I say that all of you are so much more sincere than this one ever was, but you put the mental blocks in your way. So, how to not value this realm of perceptions that we spoke about? Because if you were to keep it aside for a moment, the light of your Atma will shine and be available for you if that is His grace, if that is His will. But are you willing? Many will say, 'Oh Ananta, would you say it's all God's will, it's all God's grace?' But today it is coming to us. But is it your will? What is your will first? Do you want God? Come with me. Or do I really want God, but read the fine print? What is your will? What is it? Very lukewarm on God at all cost. All cost, but no. But the 'but' defines the boundary of your faith. I desire God and my... and to meet that instead of being in denial of it is very good. To meet that instead of being in denial of it, because many times we get lost in our own lip service. 'I can do anything for God. I can give up my life for God. My life is surrendered to you, my Master.' All of these things we say, but when push comes to shove, gone. So, it's not something to feel guilty about, but it's good to notice and see. We say our life is for God. We say that God is reality and the ego is false, the world is Maya and the Self is true. But when push comes to shove, what happens?

That if you commit 100% to be with the Atma within and not go with the mind, then you may have a life where it becomes 50/50 between heart and head. But if you say, 'I'm going to balance it out and do 50/50,' then it's all 100% head. So moment to moment, we must come in. And those who raised their hand saying that yes, the presence of God is apparent, they have no excuse to not live in that presence.

It is a yes. Like, this life is for God, that's very clear. Yet, like she said, there is temptation in the night. Many times it feels like a strong sadhana, you know, to just whatever it takes. And I fail, yes, and I commit and I fail. Sometimes it really feels like a deep... like, you know, you have to just keep your ground. It's hard. It's not easy. But this is clear, that my life is 100% for God. So it's not 50/50. Yet, it's very... it's difficult also.

It is difficult, yeah. To completely overcome the mind is probably the most difficult endeavor in the human condition.

And we feel... I feel like I just never know what the next test is. You know, you can never... and it can feel so real and so like you need to know. And your mind wants to rush, your mind wants to...

The dichotomy is that it is the most difficult endeavor in the human condition, and yet in the moment, it is the simplest thing. Yes, as a moment-to-moment, thought-by-thought... that's the only way to do it. Because you cannot say, 'It will never happen now, I'm done.' Even on the walls, the one on the walls said: 'Vigilance till my dying breath.'

Father, I want to share an experience what happened yesterday. I was very irritated about something and I was annoyed that... so that itself was an irritation that should be shared first. How did you get to that point? No, actually, I was talking to my mom about something and all the past, you know, she started talking about all the past and everything. It just got to me and I was a little too irritated, granted that I understand. And I went to sleep and somehow I felt... I mean, your voice was really helping me and I felt that, okay, I have the courage. I really need to, you know, just look at this. I can't just, you know, be by it all the time. And at that time, Father, I gathered the courage and I could, like you say, don't believe it. I could just see the thoughts and I did not believe them. It was something that was really... it gave me a lot of power that yes, we do have the courage, you know, to just look at it and yes.

Patience and courage are both very important. And some of you may wonder, 'What is this courage stuff?' It's a thought, you see. But the thought threatens you with dire consequences. It holds you to your throat, holds you by your throat and says, 'No, my way or your life is a mess.' So in that moment, to stay in God's light requires courage.

Very. You just need to do this, you just need to get this, you just need to... it really like, you know, every... it felt like every breath I'm just giving it to God. Because the mind was beating and since that's my isack, it's literally like... it's a real test, Father. You just never know what comes next because it feels like...

Not what this... I'm more suspicious or concerned about those who say it is easy than those who say that when the mind comes with this topic or this, when it comes with that, then it really pushes my buttons. Rather than those who say, 'Yeah, mind nothing.' It's probably smelling of the mind already, if it's true. Of course, and my blessings of course are there for that. I bless you all that may one day all of you be able to say that it's effortless, but I don't feel like we are at that point. So it is very important to not get fooled by the mind, to remember that the spiritual mind is a great tricker and it'll often pose as your heart. 'My heart is saying...' But did you use the three tests I give you to check if it's your heart? See, many times we just rush. We just rush. Okay, so let's come back to where we were, the basics. So, Godless life is a zombie life. It is possible, and it must be, to come to the discovery of God while we are still alive, while this waking state still appears. It is not only for the rare ones; it is possible for all of us. It's not going to be easy, but it is simple in the sense that what needs to be done is simple. But to follow, to live that moment to moment can seem difficult, especially when the mind tempts us with our deepest attachments and fears.

So I'm here for the first time, and I'm hearing this tension between God or our spirit and the mind. I've always thought of the mind as a scared child in many ways. And like, I guess I'm missing the point of why does there have to be a fight when it's just... when I speak to my child and he is scared and I understand the fear, it dissolves and then it becomes one. So I'm trying to understand this fight versus the coexisting. Maybe I'm missing something here. Thank you.

Thank you. That's a very good question. So many over the years, so many have asked me this: 'Why are we always picking on the mind? Isn't the mind also Consciousness? The mind is also Consciousness. Is the mind not made by God?' So what happens is that Maya without the narrative, like pure perception without the narrative, doesn't have any sting. Try to suffer with just perception. Do it. But when the narrator comes and says, 'This is what is happening...' So if I ask you, what is this? What would you say? What is this? Yeah, anything. This, a chair, or...?

Yeah, I don't... I mean, without a story there's nothing.

So you notice that the truth is not definable in that way. Because if I was to ask all of you separately without hearing the other one's answer, each of you or each of your minds may come up with a different response in terms of what this is. One may say, 'This is a satsang with the Father.' This is just a bunch of seekers trying to understand some silly things, you know? It could be various things. Some may say, 'I don't know what this is, but I'm very bored.' All the way. So if the truth of one moment could be captured conceptually through this bundle of thoughts, then our narratives could have some value. But because we really cannot capture the essence of even one moment in a notion, then we must question: Is there a greater underlying reality than that which is proposed by the mind, which is a scared child to some, it could be an oppressive parent to another? It takes on various shades. And most of the protestations about not highlighting the trouble caused by the mind comes from where? Comes from the mind itself. See, very few have said, 'Ah, but my heart is saying leave the mind alone.' Can you say?

I guess it's not about leaving the mind alone. It's just about... I think I'm having trouble with this idea of there should be disharmony between the mind and the heart and the center, versus a sense of working together to find God.

Okay, very good. So let's look at it through the lens of all the great Masters. Bhagavan Sri Ramana Maharshi said that you have only one choice, which is to go with your stream of thoughts or to leave them. And then you will realize at the end that even to make that choice was grace. He said like that. Papaji said, 'Keep quiet.' What did he mean by keep quiet? Did he say outwardly? Did he mean outwardly? No. 'Keep quiet' is the silence, the absence of egoic belief, which only comes if you believe your thoughts. Guruji says, 'Let them come and go, don't identify.' I say, 'Don't believe your next thought.' So why is it that in all of these statements it seems like we are identifying something? It seems to get in the way. And you're right that it is being said in a way that it seems to get in the way. And why? I mean, would it be creative if there were just harmony between the mind and heart? The fact is that Maya really has two jobs. One is to hide the reality of what you are, of what God is, and the second is to present an alternative version of that reality, you see. So that presentation of the alternative version of reality happens where? Mind. It doesn't happen if you're just in pure perception. You cannot suffer. You can feel pain, of course, but you can't feel pride, you can't feel guilt, you can't feel remorse, regret. All the great bad emotions are perceptions mixed with the interpretations from the mind.

Now this would be a big problem if we did not have a higher source of intelligence. Like, how to function without the mind? I don't even know whether I'm supposed to go left or right. Then it would seem like to live without the mind is a zombie life. So you can say, 'I don't agree with you, and actually if I was to live without the mind, I would be a zombie. Like, where do I go?' But that would only be true if it was not true that there is a higher guide, a higher navigator available to us moment to moment to run this life, to run this play. And you come to... most of you come to satsang because you want to hear the voice of that higher guide, which is your own heart, which is your own heart. Otherwise, you would not travel all the way to sit uncomfortably in this hall if it were just to hear another one speaking their mind. So how is it that all the sages have said we must come to the no-mind, Manonasha, the unborn, whichever terms you may want to use? So I'm not asking you to discard your perspective about it. I'm just asking you to contemplate even deeper and see if there's something to this. The presentation of the worldly appearance as our reality happens through the voice of which narrator? And when we say that 'but this one is valuable to me,' what are we taking ourselves to be? It's worth contemplating who is the 'I' in that. Because to the mind, from the mind framework, there is only one 'I'—this one—even if it has great spiritual, almost encyclopedic spiritual knowledge now because there's a great availability of it. But who does it really present the 'I' to be? And is that not the main distraction, the main thing that keeps us away from the discovery of the truth? So you spotted very correctly, spotted very correctly that there is a constant persuasion in satsang to look for a deeper voice which is intuitive, which is heartfelt, which is accompanied by the presence of love, than to follow the will of the mind, the desire of the mind. So my recommendation is to really contemplate it. There are two approaches you can have, right? You can say, one: 'I don't like this. I really don't like this because I can't agree with it. I may try, but I just can't agree with it. So I don't know, I don't think satsang is for me, at least satsang with Ananta.'

My constant persuasion in satsang is to look for a deeper voice which is intuitive, which is heartfelt, which is accompanied by the presence of love, rather than to follow the will of the mind, the desire of the mind. So my recommendation is to really contemplate it. There are two approaches you can have, right? You can say, one: 'I don't like this. I really don't like this because I can't agree with it. I may try, but I just can't agree with it. So I don't know, I don't think satsang is for me—at least satsang with Ananta is not for me.' The second approach is to take a few weeks to really contemplate and say: 'What is the story that the mind tells me? What is its basis? What is this reality? Who is the central protagonist of that story? Who is this making this phone call to me?' If it is my voice, why does it need to call me? 'Hello, this one doesn't like you. Hello, this one is not making sense.' What? That's my voice? Then who's calling? Because I should know already. So we can explore either ends of it: whose voice is this, or who is receiving the messaging?

So the switchover from head to heart is a very clichéd version of all spirituality. It is what you do: switch over from head to heart. And I used to feel like it's some general, you know, cliché-type statement until I realized that actually it is very precise. What is this switchover from head to heart? It is the going from darkness to light. Now, is your mind going to like any of what I'm saying? Of course not. It probably wants to strangle me right now. Absolutely, it will attack. It reminds me of the story: somebody in a chai shop came to Guruji. He came to Guruji and said, 'I love you very much, Reality, but right now I just want to throw this hot cup of tea at you.' You know, our mind is really attacking you right now. It doesn't like this, obviously.

So if we find that after we've contemplated, we find that yes, there is an intuitive voice, the heart presence, but that is limited... So, I have Alexa in my house, I have Siri in my house. Alexa is good for this, Siri is good for that. Then you may say, 'Okay, now I'll use both because both help me see.' But let's first find the capabilities. Let's say, 'Okay, this is what my heart can't do, therefore I need to use both the devices.' Then the intellect will ask: 'If the mind causes all this trouble and we don't need it, then why did God create it?' There's no real answer. We can never say 'why' about anything that God has done, like 'why this?' So we come up with explanations just to satisfy, again, the mind. Just to say it is entertainment for God. Why? Was He bored? If God could get bored, then we are all in big trouble. Or God is playing this game to evolve, to come to a greater evolution. If God needed to evolve, then again, we are in big trouble.

Then the third explanation is that God could experience love in a manifest form. Is it that God wanted to still have an experience of something that's called a desire? Then again, we are in it. So usually I say, whatever appears to you: if this is a Leela which is for the play of Consciousness for its entertainment, that's fine. If you feel it's an evolution of Consciousness, that's fine. If you feel it is to experience a manifest aspect of love, yes, that's fine. But it is pride to presume that we can, in our intellect, fit an answer to why God does anything. But I'll still offer a simplistic answer, which is not true—this is a placeholder.

Suppose that... what is the biggest video game company in the world? EA Sports, Epic Games? Someone must be one of them. So they make the game and it comes on, but there's no context, there's no narrative. There's a character, you're in the middle of this universe. What are you meant to do? You have a gun in your hand, you don't know what you're supposed to do with that. You're just like, 'What is this game? I can't understand it. Turn it off.' So how does Maya become compelling? See, because it tells you: 'You are this one, Mr. James Bond. Your next mission is to rescue that princess from that castle lord.' Okay, I'm old, these are the games. And then you say, 'Okay, I'm James, I need to do that.' So this is the juice of this Leela. Without this, it doesn't have juice; it doesn't have sting either way. And to transcend it would not be a project at all if all there was was pure perception. If you're just living in the now, attention is not getting diffused and going to your thoughts, then you're practically free.

And for the mind, it feels almost like an existential crisis coming to satsang, because we may say that 'I'm looking for a nice coordination between my head and heart,' but at least the mind that was here never suggested, 'Oh, let's go to God for this.' Only when it is completely out of moves and in the depth of suffering, then it said, 'God, God, God.' Without this, it says, 'I can do this, I can do this, I can do this.' My mind never wanted to ask: 'Who am I? What is my reality? What is my purpose?' And even when it pretended to ask, it satisfied itself with conceptual answers rather than spiritual insight.

So if you're going to use the mind, then we must use it to chant the name of God, to pray. What is the example they use? When the elephant is walking through the marketplace, it disrupts everything with its trunk, you see? The fruit shop, the vegetable shop, everything. So what does the mahout do? He gets the trunk to hold a stick. The trunk holds a stick, and then that elephant walking through the market causes no trouble. So that is the prayer, that is the mantra, that is the chanting. If we keep our mind busy in remembrance of God, in the chanting of God's name, then it doesn't cause you the suffering. And then for many of us, it will be that once we are trained in that way, then we can effortlessly remain in the no-mind or the manonasha. Master Bankei said all things are perfectly resolved in the Unborn. In the Unborn what? Because you were born otherwise. For whom? Resolved for whom? All things are perfectly resolved in the Unborn mind. So look at it not as an attack, but as an upgrade. I'm telling you that your Windows 3.5 doesn't work now; you need to move to Windows 11 or Mac OS, something like that.

Father, what is the Unborn mind?

The one who is watching everything. Yes, the one that is perceiving this world. Is it perceiving through the lens of thought? See, it's not. It's independent of thought. So Bhagavan Ramana Maharshi said the mind is a bundle of thoughts; that's the simplest definition. So to remain open and empty, to allow all these thoughts to come and go... what did the Zen master say? Keep the front door and back door open. Thoughts are visitors; let them come and go. Don't serve them tea. What is the tea? I'm not asking for the gossip—I picked up some of this from my teenage children—but what would be to 'serve them tea'? To believe them. Give them your belief. So you can perceive them, you can observe them coming and going, but not automatically. Many in spirituality feel like they are meditating like that; naturally allow them to come and go. It is their nature to come and go. Don't hang on to them. Don't grasp. The Buddha said to grasp is to suffer. To grasp what? What is he saying? Grasping is suffering. What is he saying not to grasp? The same mind. What else can we grasp at? He's not saying don't grasp at this, don't grasp at this—he's not talking about a physical grasping, because this doesn't cause suffering. These thoughts are energy, and it is their nature to come and go.

I don't know, but like, I don't know whether this is what this means, but in the last few days I've sensed, before a so-called negative thought stream comes into my awareness, before it, I seem to sense a negative energy. And it's like a dark cloud. But when I notice it, even before that, my favorite ones... like you say, we all have our favorites, right? So the same ones, it'll keep telling you the same thing. And even before it comes, it's like, 'Oh, it's coming.' It's very odd. I don't know. But it was a great sense of realizing that it's energy.

Now, you'll find it strange, but I'm going to support the appearance of whatever energy has to come. Support in the sense that all energy can come, and nothing really, for Consciousness, truly is either oppressive or expansive. See, it is the substratum in which these energies come and go. It is not affected really by them. Just like the space—like a great teacher said, the space in the room is not affected by what furniture you put in it. So your being, your Consciousness, is like that. It is actually unaffected. It only seems to get affected by our interpretation of it as good or bad, negative or positive.

So you mean that there wouldn't be a feeling of being a dark cloud? It's just energy?

How does it matter to the sky whether the cloud is dark or light? Okay, so what happens when you come to the no-mind, and you come to the Unborn, and you come to the manonasha? You come to the discovery of that which you cannot understand. Because if you found God as an object, you would say, 'Oh, God is this,' and in the world you would just be able to replicate it and say, 'Ah, this is it. God is an object.' If we found it is purely Nirguna, purely non-phenomenal, then most of us would not come to it. We need a bridge between the phenomenality and the pure Nirguna quality. So we come to the living presence of a being which is our own presence. Atma: is it phenomenal or non-phenomenal? You cannot really say. It is both and neither. Because if it was either, it would not serve its purpose. If it was just objective, then it would be like a kidney or a stomach. So I'm saying the spirit is within you, you say, 'Yeah, everybody has a kidney, everybody has a stomach.' So spirit would be just a pure object like that.

What do phenomena mean?

Like a perceivable thing. Or if it's energy, you see, like anger or love or something like that, then we say, 'Okay, it's this energy,' you see? So I can put a box around it and say, 'Okay, this is good, this is bad.' I could do that. But when we come to Atma, what happens? We come to the discovery of something which our mind cannot understand. It is beyond the mind and intellect. So should we try it like a practical thing? So let's both become empty of the mind, just like that. Just follow what I'm saying and tell me if it doesn't happen. Keep stopping, yeah. Just follow, and if it doesn't happen, you can tell me it's not happening. Let's start.

So just empty right now. Empty, empty, empty. You're not doing anything. We're not thinking anything. We're not trying to accomplish anything at all. Just now, now, now. Right now, you don't even know what your name is until you think about it. As these thoughts come, allow them to come and go. Just let them come and let them go. Meet them as if you are space. Be the space in which they are appearing and disappearing. Remain like that, empty in the Unborn, in the no-mind. Are you still breathing? Don't think about it. Don't even have to answer the question. Just notice if you can. Breath is happening, hearing is happening. And soon you will find that just like these words are appearing through this mouth without having to think about anything, actions will also move. Life does not become vegetative when we live in the no-mind. In fact, most of you will report that you have not experienced life truly before this. Moment to moment, it is very simple. It happens.

So yes, I agree the moment-to-moment feels really simple. And life has to be lived. Can we live life a few moments at a time? No, it's always moment to moment. So I guess the question is, like, here you are in front of us, right? You've gone through years of study and self-reflection, and you've created this beautiful space. Did that happen moment to moment, or did that require some planning with the mind?

Did this movement that we find ourselves in, in this moment, require mind activity? No, it didn't. It is completely—or let me not say completely, but 99.9%—heartfelt, because 100% is another trick that the mind itself can play. So just like these words are just heart-to-mouth, and your head nodding is also just happening on its own without mental intervention, you must experiment with this and see a different texture of life without the boundaries that the mind sets for you. And you can start with a weekend if you want.

Did this movement that we find ourselves in in this moment require mind activity? No, it didn't. It is completely—or let me not say completely, but 99.9%—heartfelt, because 100% is another trick that the mind itself can play. So just like these words are just happening to mouth, and your head nodding is also just happening on its own without mental intervention, you must experiment with this and see a different texture of life without the boundaries that the mind sets for you. And you can start with a weekend if you like. Start with like a weekend; you say, 'Okay, now just I'm going to be moment to moment this weekend. And if I become vegetative and I sit on my bed all weekend, it's okay. I'm never going to go to that guy again; he's an idiot, he doesn't know what he's talking about.' But let me just take a risk of one, maybe just one day out of the weekend, one Saturday or one Sunday. Just live in the no-mind and see if there's a different texture to your life.

And how do you honor your commitment to others? How do you, when you live like that? You have children, yeah, you have commitments that you've made to them. So how do you balance that?

That's why I'm saying that if where you're moving from then is a subset or an inferior intelligence which cannot move your life in the greatest symphony, then you may say, 'Yes, I'm not doing my duty for my family; my responsibilities are getting left behind.' But what you may find is that the beats of this intelligence, your intuitive intelligence, are different. But you will see the outcomes if you don't judge them with your mind. If you just allow your heart to prevail, you will find beautiful grace flowing through your life.

And very often I take this example I saw on National Geographic TV. There was this bird that was born—they didn't show what happened to the parents, it was one of those Attenborough things—so the bird was there and they followed it till the season was about to change. And the bird suddenly started flying alone. No flock, nobody guiding it, no compass. It started flying towards where those birds migrate to every year when the season changes. What makes the birds fly there? Another documentary where there was rainfall 150 miles away and there was no sign of it perceptually, yet some intelligence flew the birds towards that water. How does a plant decide what should be the weight of the fruit on its branch? What is beating our heart right now? Supposedly millions of processes are happening in this body. So if we had to pick between those processes versus the things we have to do, and we could only have one, we would definitely pick those that God is doing. Because without that, what is that intelligence? And what is defined as the boundary of that intelligence? That which can beat your heart is making the universe function; can that not run our life as well? Is it not already running our life?

To pretend as if we are in control of this flow of the river called life is a great fallacy. And you know how we pretend? The one that pretends doesn't know how to move a finger. I've said this many times: who here knows how to move a finger? 'I moved it.' You like that? What happened? How did you move it? Apparently some neurons have to fire in the brain, some nerves have to get activated, something has to move. I've not met anyone who knows how to fire a single neuron. Does anyone know? And millions of neurons have to fire in a moment. We can't fire a single one. So we don't even know how the slightest movement happens through us, or that which we call us. Who is the doer of all of this? Who has put all this intelligence in place for whom to use? We say nature does all of this. Nature decided the speed of light will be the constant, this gravitational constant is this. What is that nature? What is that intelligence that you're calling nature?

It's very strange. One of the satsang members sent me a video also about this, but I've always wondered—and I was an atheist for a large part of my life—and I always wonder now how I found it easier to conclude that all this intelligence, all of this stuff—light, sound, magnetism, gravitation, all millions and millions of things—found it easier to believe that it comes out of an inert nothing than an intelligent all-thing. Because we are of scientific temperament; that's what I always prided myself on, that all of this intelligence must come from an inert nothingness rather than a Supreme intelligence. And where is that intelligence available in the human condition? In that which is called the Satguru presence within.

Like I said, we can never say why God did anything because our intellect is too small. We know only intuitively. But I like to feel that it was His grace and His mercy that allowed us to come to the discovery of this Atma in a way that the mind cannot conceive of or understand. Because to the mind, already something which is Nirguna, non-phenomenal, is out of its pay grade. It can have the word 'Nirguna,' but it cannot fathom Nirguna. Like, it will fathom a dark empty space, which is still guna; darkness and emptiness are still gunas. So Nirguna it cannot fathom. So God has sent us or given to us the possibility of the discovery of the Atma, which is both Saguna and Nirguna. And that's where we were saying that if it was purely Saguna, then we would have completely just objectified it. 'Oh, here it is, here.' Surgeons would be making a killing just finding the Atma within: 'Here, I found it.' If it is purely objective, it would be like that. If it is purely nominal, then again it would be out of the reach of most. So that's why I like to refer to the Atma as the helping hand, the tip of the iceberg called God.

Those of you who say you come to the presence or you can meet the presence within, what is the quality of this meeting? What are you finding? I keep saying that your Atma is a living being. It's a holy presence. What is your discovery of this? What is your report about that? What I'm trying to counter is that we make it another like either an emotion or like a force of nature. When we just say 'Consciousness' or 'beingness' also, what is happening is we become very analytical and scientific about how beingness is there. Do we realize we're talking about the living being? That which is living in us, that which is the source of all life in us, is this being. So I want you to meet it as the Guru within, as a being within. If I said the Guru is within you, would you look at it just as like, 'Oh, like some anger is within me,' or you see what I'm trying to do? You have to appreciate the fact that there is a living being. The Christians call it personal; in the Indic context, it will become very confusing. Personal God is not personal in the way that we take the ego to be, but there's a living being—intelligent, hearing, answering.

Most of us are not aware of this, at least not through direct insight. That's why mostly we can say, 'Yeah, yeah, presence is there.' So then what we realize is that there's a living being who hears you, who sees you, who sees this world, who sees this life, who is God's presence itself. God is alive in you right now. He knows your every breath, your every heartbeat. God is not just some conceptual idea, somebody sitting in heaven. Like a place called heaven where He lives in you—that is heaven. That is the Kingdom of Heaven within you. It's very important to meet this presence because that is what, like I said in the beginning, spirituality is about. This is the spirit. To come to Atma, to come to Atma is the most important thing. So I really implore all of you not to make this a priority—do not not make this a priority. And also the silliest thing we can do is to just think that we are living in the presence because we're too proud, we're too intelligent to admit otherwise.

I have a question, Father. Yes, Ma. I don't know if it's appropriate for me to ask because I don't know if you're doing the online questions, but it's really burning. So I'm increasingly staying in the place of no identity, but my question to you is: I'm really struggling with speaking from no identity or thinking from no identity. The minute I have to think or I have to speak, the identity comes back. I don't know if that's to be transcended or that's normal. That seems to be the theme for today's satsang anyway.

So you say that 'I'm staying in the place of no identity.' Then what happens if I need to think or speak? Who is this one, the one which is not identity?

Yeah, exactly. I mean, even asking this question, I need to have identity. I have identity asking this question because in the place of no identity...

Yes, let's make it simpler. Let's make it very simple. Just return to your emptiness. Return to the quiet place in your heart. Allow that to speak through your mouth. Allow that to move your body. Allow all words to come from that. And you remember I give you the three tips: how do you know that it is coming from the Atma within and not your head? If you experience the presence of an unconditional love, that is the most gross but still very beautiful way. Subtler is if you can sense it coming from your presence itself, truly sense it; your presence is palpable to you in that moment and it is coming from there. That is subtler. And the most foolproof way is to check if your truth, your reality, the Nirguna reality of the Self, is apparent to you as the words or the guidance is being received. Then you know it is coming from your heart.

My invitation is to only speak that which comes from there. Only do that which comes from there. Only live from there. And don't make it subservient to your mind saying, 'Oh, but right now I need to think.' Why is your spirit unable to guide you about certain things? We were talking about this in the last satsang, how we'll get into this pressure: 'Oh, but there's a deadline, tickets need to be booked, I need to fly, accommodation needs to be done.' Who is going to do that? Who is running this universe? That one can do it better than anything that we think we can. To the mind, this will sound like I'm promoting an active passiveness or something. I'm not, because to the mind it sounds like that, no? 'Then you're just sitting around all day.' It's not what I'm saying at all. A life lived from the heart can be full of outdoor activity, you see? So don't let your mind put you under this kind of pressure saying, 'But I need to think, I need to do something.' Because the danger of that, especially in spirituality, is that then it becomes a very performative spirituality. Get one taste of spirit, then you just give it to the mind and live from there, and then you're just talking, talking, talking, but there's no real spirituality left. Then it becomes all convoluted and egotistical.

Father, in my experience, this place has absolutely nothing to say. So if that was the case, you say 'speak from this place.' If that was the case, like almost it seems it seems like 100% of my words would be cut down.

Yes, 99%, 98% of the words spoken in satsang come from where? And why do you come to hear them? It will seem like—like after I sat on the hot seat with Guruji and whatever happened happened, then for a few months it seemed like it was just quiet. For three or four months it felt like there are no words. And my phone would ring—my job was still there—so it would ring. I would look at it: 'How do I answer this now? What would I answer?' And then the words would just come. And I'm not saying instinctively; there's a difference between instinctively and intuitively, or impulsively. There's a difference between impulsively and intuitively. There's a different fragrance to things which are impulsive or instinctive. This is beyond instinct, this is beyond impulse.

So many times, let's take the usual example: you have said, 'I didn't want to come to satsang. I was frustrated, I was angry, I didn't want to hear you.' But jokingly some say that 'My bike drove me here, my feet walked me here. I didn't want to come; I wanted to just watch a movie or something, take a break.' Then of course you're allowed to do that, but you just—okay, what guides you? You say, 'My mind was resisting with all its might, but I still knew I had to come.' What is that knowledge? So don't presume that God's presence...

Let's take the usual example. You have said, 'I didn't want to come to satsang. I was frustrated, I was angry, I didn't want to hear you.' But jokingly, some say that 'My bike drove me here, my feet walked me here. I didn't want to come; I wanted to just watch a movie or something, take a break.' Then, of course, you're allowed to do that. But you just—okay, what guides you? You say, 'My mind was resisting with all its might, but I still knew I had to come.' What is that knowledge? So don't presume that God's presence cannot use words. But if silence is the best answer at the moment, then we must trust that silence. We are not in a position to make any sort of demands. So trust the silence higher than the highest from the intellect. And is your heart saying that? The heart cannot use words. Who is saying? If the mind is saying, 'I told you this,' or 'Was I not talking with you?' and I said, 'You call the thief, I'm out to catch you. Please tell me your address, tell me how to get you,' what do you think it's going to say? It's going to say, 'I'm not here, I'm there, over there,' throw a stone in the bushes to make some noise and to distract you away from that. So either your heart is telling you that—the heart cannot speak words in that case, it's speaking those words—or you're rushing. Don't rush. Often I joke that we expect answers from God faster than we expect Domino's to deliver. But you're not entitled to those answers. With humility, all things are easier. So don't go with your mind's judgments about even what is happening to you.

Father, my prayer is for me to just remain in the silence, in the space of no identity, and to only speak when this wants to speak. This is my deepest prayer.

Very good, very good, very good. This is why faith is very important. Faith is to trust what your heart is telling you, what your heart is showing you in this case, rather than going with the intellect. Okay, I'm waiting here with you now, and let's take as long as you need. See something from your heart without judging from the mind.

I can't. It's only been a minute. I can't speak.

Don't rush. Just—I don't want to speak. Hand over your mouth to your heart and don't use it for projecting what the mind is saying at all.

The thing is that it can seem like the heart is a place, the head is a place. 'When I live in my heart, then words don't come.' We don't realize that the heart is a living being. That's what I've been trying to say. The Supreme intelligence lives as a living being called Atma in your heart. And you cannot just leave this; you must either prove me wrong or prove me right. It's not one of those things you can say, because literally it is the difference between life and death. One child was having a moment, as all of us do. In this past for three years, I was very frustrated reading Maharaj, but she said, 'I don't know if I'm cut out for God.' I said to her, 'What is option two? What is option two?' I don't know if I'm cut out for God, then what are we cut out for? That's selfishness, suffering, all stories of a non-existent ego. What are we cut out for then? If not God, then what? Still silence? Good, good silence.

I feel like if I—sorry, sorry Father. I feel like if I allow myself to continue here, I'll just be so dysfunctional. But I'm okay with that. I'm okay with that. I say yes to everything. You feel that? I don't feel to move. I don't feel to do anything.

You feel that intuitively?

Yes, it's like everything has ceased. That you don't feel to move intuitively.

So how is that guidance being received? Is that your heart speaking with you then?

Yes. Maybe you're expecting it to be in a different way. Maybe you're just expecting it to be in a different way because you're saying that intuitively from your heart you feel not to move. But that is your heart then guiding you, isn't it? But it's too radical, Father. It's so radical.

This is not your heart? No, no.

This is not my heart. It's terrifying. This is the one that says 'balance maker,' like my mom's voice in my head. Father, did you go through a period where you didn't move at all, where you were just so dysfunctional in the sense of—in respect to the world? Was that something that happened?

Well, I would say that there was a period of a few months after I met Guruji for the first time. My family will say probably that it still continues. But they probably said that before this happened also.

When these words 'follow the heart'—I wonder why. I mean, I know the meaning of it, but on the surface of it, 'follow your heart' can be quite a—almost like—okay, not the mind, but like more kind of...

Terrible idea.

Yeah, like slightly more emotional.

Yeah, no, no, of course. And that's why for most who come to satsang first, I hopefully said this to all of you, that many people say, 'I'm not head at all, I'm all heart, you see? I'm all heart, man.' You don't need to. So, all heart, but what do they mean by that? It's definitely not the heart we are talking about. It's definitely not the Satguru's voice within, the Atma's voice within. It is just saying, 'I go with my emotions. I'm emotion over rationality.' And the sages have clearly told us that if it's between emotions and rationality, we must pick rationality because emotions are very—so the heart that I'm talking about is not emotion. Yeah, thank you for clarifying.

There's no time limit, huh? You come for the first time, you're wondering whether it'll be inappropriate to leave or something. No, no, it's all free. I'm surprised half of you haven't left yet. Just feel free, don't worry. You were saying?

As an—and you say 'I am here.' Where is this 'here'? The answer will be too much. You here, please. Um, you mentioned about somebody calls and somebody receives the call. Yes. So are there like multiple minds? I thought—I'm asking who is calling and who is receiving? If it's you, then why do you need to call yourself? Do you have to tell yourself things in words you already know what you're going to say? If you're talking to a friend and you're telling them things, it's because they don't know what you are going to say. But you know what you're going to say, you see? So then why do you have to communicate with yourself like that? Who's calling whom? It's strange that we go through our life so much, these very simple things we've never really contemplated. Because Maya, the mahathugini, Kabir Ji said 'Maya mahathugini hum jaani'—the biggest con artist. She keeps us distracted with so much to do every day. Where's the time to really contemplate whose thoughts are these, who is receiving them? The basic building blocks of that which we call the human condition, most of us don't really contemplate. We just take it as a given. 'Only I'm talking to myself in my head and it helps me.' And say 'I am here.' Where are we? You say outside and inside. Okay, let's take the simplest. When I'm on the outside, I'm confused, but when I go inside, things are so much better. Inside what are we going? If it was inside the body, it would be like an X-ray machine, isn't it? And go inside to be like an X-ray machine: organs, bones. But inside is what? Where is that inside? And that inside—in that inside you can imagine things, you can project dreams which look like entire universes. Time is there, space is there, identity is there, characters are there, story is there, everything is there. Pain is there, pleasure is there in that inside. Dreams. In the dream, you could have another inside, have another dream, and wake up from that dream and say, 'I had a dream,' and then wake up from that dream now and say, 'Oh, I'll wake up then from this.' We can't see. So the very basics of our human existence we've not really contemplated. What is that space in which we experience mountains and rivers and time, and it all vanishes and we say, 'Ah yes, just in my mind.' This absurd conversation could also be happening in your mind. Sounds like a bad dream. In which light is all of this perceived? In whose light is all of this perceived? Sorry, you were asking some other question.

I didn't get the answer, but I got the—so we come to satsang, we have somewhere we have seen that this is the truth and you have to not believe that mind. But it is—sometimes it feels like we're not just fighting our mind, but our family's mind, their logic, their friends' minds, work mind. So somewhere it becomes very dull. How do we—should we keep tough? Yes, it becomes very tough. It's not just us, our mind only. That is only not happening, but family's logic, their mind. In fact, if they are against this spirituality, then it becomes even more tough.

So let's take a live example. So you remain in the no-mind, I'll play your family. Okay, ready? Remain in the no-mind. I don't want to cause you additional suffering. Okay, so: 'You're too young for all of this. You should get serious about your career. You make sure that you have a family, do your responsibilities, then do all of this stuff. And what are you finding anyway? You still get angry, still get upset. What is the point of all of this? And what is most important—I'm not saying don't do it, you must do it—but you're old enough to realize the priorities of things. You must balance things out, do things properly. How much do you want us to explain to you?' Sound familiar? So what happened? If you are in the no-mind, can another thought really make us suffer? And I'm not, by the way, at all saying that we must do—I'm saying that take everything to the heart within. Take everything to the Satguru within. You must never feel like we know it all. You must never even believe that our path is only the best path, it's the right path. Every type of spirituality I went to, I felt like, 'This is the best, I'm in the best, and everybody else is stupid.' Then I realized with gray hair that it's not like that. You must always be open to learning. But remaining in the no-mind, allow everything to be perceived, but act on that which you receive in a prompting. Is it tough? It's tough to remain in the no-mind, but once you are in the no-mind, all is a play of moving images. When it comes to family, we quickly take it personally and we quickly want to act like, 'Okay, they are saying it must be something, cannot hurt them or cannot disrespect.' It's true, it's true. And still have to say that even here, that is true. It still has a bite, has a sting. It's a life of work, it's a life of inner sadhana, it's a life of inner work. And they will feel exactly the same, that you are making them suffer, that you are giving them a sadhana to do. It's not easy because Maya will use every trick to make you believe that this is the reality and all talk of God is fine, but it's not really that important. Your faith, your insight will lead you towards prioritizing that. And if you try to juggle this, it can seem like a very tough thing to do. But if you allow yourself to be guided moment to moment in the heart, then that is the highest Grace for yourself and for your family.

So I wrote to Guruji after two or three months of that silent period here, and nothing much was happening. Work was not happening much, and everybody started saying—my mom started saying, my wife started saying—'Are you depressed? Is there something wrong with you?' you see? And my daughter was very young, probably maybe a year or two years old. So everybody started to be very concerned. So I wrote to Guruji saying, 'I'm feeling so much joy in my heart, but the family is starting to get worried about work, career, all of these things.' So he replied saying that this naturally happens, that there's a period of marination, silence. But in this coming to the presence of God, it is bound to be full of grace, not just for your life but also for your family. I'm going to add to that in paraphrase: don't expect them to come and tell you that. Don't expect them to come and tell you, 'Oh, we are so blessed to be in the presence of one who is living in God's light.' But know in your heart that all those who come to that presence are blessed, and you receive that Grace by the Satguru's Grace yourself, and that is a great gift that you have received. So know in your heart that if you continue to be in God, your loved ones will also be blessed.

For your life, but also for your family. I'm going to add to that and paraphrase: don't expect them to come and tell you that. Don't expect them to come and tell you, 'Oh, we are so blessed to be in the presence of one who is living in God's light.' But know in your heart that all those who come to that presence are blessed, and you receive that Grace by the Satguru's Grace yourself. And that is a great gift that you have received. So know in your heart that if you continue to be in God, your loved ones will also be blessed by that. But don't expect that validation to come, or you don't have to go and tell them that they are so blessed. But also keep an openness in hearing your parents and like that, in the sense that don't just naturally discard. Thank you. But to answer the question more directly: others' thoughts cannot bother you; it's only your own.

Just a follow-on to his question. I've encountered, like everybody has, these types of situations with other people. And it's like your question you asked in the beginning was, 'What's happening in this room?' or 'What is this?' You can't explain that. There's no way I found that I can explain anything to anybody, so it's just come to kind of a silence. And initially, it was a very uncomfortable silence because it's conditioned to convince, respond, respond with rational statements. Now that's just gone. It is just not my—I don't know who—but that being is not even interested in an explanation. But it's a huge relief. Thank you for that.

Thank you. It's awkward for a moment when someone asks me, 'What do you do these days?' I started thinking that I'm turning—I'm trying to turn people to God, away from the ego. But for many years, I was just—I used to talk about my other work and like that, not my main work, huh?

What about the kids? What about the kids?

Because they were small, that was one advantage also. So it was not a sudden transformation for them, so they know very much, huh? Now what they say—what do they say about it? What do they say? I don't know. I don't know. They probably make some fun of me. It's true.

Let me put it all that I've said in a simple way. If there was an option that you could walk hand in hand with Ram, Krishna, Jesus, whoever you resonate with in your heart, then would you choose to live that way or no? So I'm telling you that that option is completely true, although it may not be in the way that we think. But the relationship is even more intimate than that, even more close, even more heartfelt than that. That is basically the essence of what I'm saying. And I'm just pointing to the things which block us from that, block us from that vision, and which encourage us to live in this way. So both ends of the spectrum.

Can I force any of you? Of course not. Do I want any of you to believe me? Not really. Don't believe, but explore for yourself. Contemplate if there is a possibility this could be true. Otherwise, you are free to write me off as a complete madman and fool; it's no problem in that. But suppose it was true? And what is the simplest way in which I can explain what needs to be done to come to this walking, being in God's light? It is to be empty of the 'me'. The lane is too narrow. Kabir Ji has said: if there is 'me', there cannot be God; if there's God, there cannot really be a 'me'. So whether you like to inquire, whether you like to pray, whether you like to chant, whether you like to meditate, whether you like Hatha Yoga, whether you like devotional singing, whether you like anything which makes you empty of this 'me'—selfless service, Karma Yoga, all of it—empty of this 'me', the man, then we leave the lane empty for God.

And if it is truly what you desire in your heart, then my full blessings, my full life is for you actually. So may this be the year that all of you deepen in your love for God, deepen in your commitment to spend your life in His light. Okay, thank you.