Accept Everything as if from God - 24 July 2024

So in all our lives, all our brothers and sisters, all of us are dealing with both these force fields: the very pushy force field of egotism, which mixed with the world appearance makes what we call Maya, and the patient, loving force field, the voice which is calling you within to a deeper exploration of who you are and the presence of the Atma within now. So the mind has all the answers. It provides all the answers, especially if you've lived a few years. But that which keeps us caught up in Maya and prevents us from undertaking this deep exploration to come to Atma Darshan, that must be recognized as getting in the way of, you know, true fulfillment of the purpose of our life.

We cannot be God's temple without first surrendering our egotism, wanting really to come to self-discovery, self-recognition. Or another way to see the same thing is to come to God's presence, God's light. So most of our brothers and sisters may say, 'But yes, I do believe in God.' So, but to take the next step to go from belief to actual insight, to actual recognition, Atma Gyan, that is very important. And the cost of that very few are willing to pay. The cost of that is what? It's not a worldly cost. There's no VIP line to God. You cannot get VIP Darshan to God no matter how much whatever worldly things you may do. What is the cost then? Of our pride, of our egotism, because the lane is very narrow. The lane is very narrow. If there is me, there cannot be God. If there is God, there cannot be me.

So that is a lifelong project and it's very difficult. Saying, 'Lord, what kind of satsang do we have?' You go to other places, everyone says, 'Yes, yes, you come, you do this, you'll be very happy, you'll be fine, you'll be all will be sorted.' Come to satsang here, you hear it's so difficult. It's a lifelong project. Very few actually want it. From those who actually want it, very few may actually have that faith to fully dive in. But maybe it is just because I am so foolish that it is and was so difficult here to not get involved in pride and to take God to be the living presence, the living reality.

So how do we go from a mere belief that 'Yes, I believe in God' to a true insight? The absence of focus on the 'me' is the first step. To recognize how do we focus on this 'me'? You're just sitting here, try to focus on 'me', on the 'me' yourself. How did in natural perception can you? It's fine. Then what happens? The Pink Panther, this thought comes into our mind. It says, 'Hmm, I think,' or 'I am right about how could he have said that to me? How could she have done this to me?' Some, some... and what is that thought attempting to capture? What is it attempting to capture? It's trying to capture some truth from this world into a conceptual idea, isn't it? It's trying to offer us some truth. Let's put it simply like that: that this is the proposal, this is a notion, there is truth in that. And all of us have the power to give it truth value or not. That is what is called belief.

Now if it was just like that, it would be fine. But the minute you buy into a concept proposing as if it is the truth, you also buy into a limited notion of yourself as this body-mind, as this identity, as this person. Before that, everything was just merely appearing in front of you. Even this body is just merely appearing in front of you. Even your thoughts, your memories, imagination, all of that is just merely appearing in front of you. So like Kabir Ji said that Maya is... it's not like many feel like it's just the appearance of this world is Maya. In the mere appearance of this world, it's just His Leela is appearing. It is not yet become Maya for us. The waking state is appearing, everything is like this. No perception, no sensation by itself has any power to get us embroiled in Maya.

What strong, strong Maya is, Donkey Kong level two, appearances everywhere, emotions you see, everything in every level of our existence. It may seem like something is buzzing, you see? And then the mind comes and says, 'Ah, this is what it is. If only I had this, if only this was true, if I had this much money I'd be happy, if only that relationship would work out I'd be happy, if only my body was healthier I'd be happy, if only I understood the meaning of life I'd be happy.' So all of these constructs then get us trapped into Maya. But just as pure perception... but I've experimented and explored and really dived deep into this contemplation as to what is the best mechanism, how do I guide everyone, what are the tools available to remain empty of this Maya? To be Mukti is important so that we can come to a true insight of the Atma. You cannot be embroiled in Maya and come to Atma at the same time. You cannot be me, me, me, Maya and God, God, God at the same time.

So, and in my contemplations, I have found that inquiry, prayer, remaining empty in whatever way are very straightforward mechanisms. They seem very difficult to the mind, but what is actually being asked of us? What is actually being asked of us? What is being asked of us is that whatever comes, comes, remember God in prayer, in the Bhakti way. Whatever comes, don't forget God. And isn't it natural for us to not forget the one that we love? So natural. It shouldn't be difficult. And we already claimed that our life is for God, we love God so much, we love the truth so much. So this aspect of remaining inward-facing in Nam or even just wordlessly is very, very natural in the human condition actually, at the core of it, because our heart itself loves to pray. Our Atma within loves to pray. So it's very natural.

And all of us experience that naturalness. Most of you in this room have concluded on many occasions that you cannot go back to your old ways, isn't it? On many, many occasions you've concluded that it is impossible now to go back to the old ways of being egoic and proud and full of me, me, me instead of full of God, God, God. And yet when Maya comes in this play, something comes, somebody says something... you could be checking in for a flight and somebody says to you, 'No, no, something is wrong with your ticket.' In that moment God is forgotten. 'How could you say?' The auto guy says, 'Give me 50 rupees more.' In that moment God could be forgotten, you see?

So Maya is always like some Apsara is going to come in front of you and to be like Vishvamitra and Maya will have to come. For most of us, Maya doesn't have to come. Just an auto is enough. So this is how Maya works, you see? And then in that moment, to save that 20 rupees, 50 rupees, we forget God and it becomes more about the 'me' and not... and we take justice upon ourselves, we take what is right upon ourselves, we take what needs to happen next upon ourselves. All that is supposed to be left to God, we take onto ourselves. Leave justice to God, leave it to God's will, all of these things. And then the mind plays the reverse trick. It says, 'If you live like that, then you will just be a doormat, you see? Everybody will just walk over you.' No, but I didn't say that.

That is because we operate in the two categories of the mind. One is the worldly category and the other is the mind category of spirituality, is it? Which says that, 'Oh, but if you're not like this, then the opposite must be true spiritually.' That means you must let every auto guy take 50 rupees extra from you? It's not... that's not what I'm saying at all. I'm just saying that even in these times, don't forget God. Allow Him to guide you, allow Him to move you. And for most of us, that seems like a very absurd sort of possibility because we don't realize that God is actually a living presence. Did something happen to the greatest teacher? That's how Maya looks. Yeah, thank you. It's good.

So how many of us take this to be a... we can reduce it. How many of us take it to be a living possibility that in the midst of the argument with the person at the check-in counter or the last auto guy you took, that you can still not rush and wait for God to guide you and God to move you? Is it absurd? It's actually not. It's the most natural. In every situation, it's the most natural. But our worldly conditioning, our Maya conditioning, has convinced us that that is not the way to be. So they will say, 'But even Krishna told Arjun to fight.' Correct, agreed. Krishna told Arjun to fight.

How many of us take it to be a living possibility that in the midst of the argument with the person at the check-in counter or the last auto you took, that you can still not rush and wait for God to guide you and God to move you? Is it absurd? It's actually not. It's the most natural. In every situation, it is the most natural, but our worldly conditioning, our Maya conditioning, has convinced us that that is not the way to be. So they will say, 'But even Krishna told Arjun to fight.' Correct, agreed. Krishna told Arjuna to fight. What is Krishna telling you? That is the question. That is your Dharma. At that moment, Krishna was telling Arjuna what his Dharma was. What is Krishna telling you now? What is God telling you now? That is what we need to understand.

To take on the bow and arrow without breathing for God's guidance is to go with my will instead of God's. This can seem very difficult initially because for most of us, God has only been a concept so far, and maybe just a blanket idea that everything is God's will—which it is—and yet our job is to find Him and therefore discover His will. Both are true. So, is God a living presence that you can actually meet? What is that place where you have to go to meet Him? You have to go inwards. Inwards into what? We cannot answer, because it's definitely not inwards into the body, the body organs, flesh, blood. But we have the capacity to go inwards, which is not the body.

All of us say, 'When I go within, then I feel better. I feel peaceful. I feel centered.' But that within is a holy place. It is not to be seen in an x-ray machine or MRI that you can find for yourself when you go within. So when you pray, naturally the words are activated by God's name, so you're drawn within into the call from your heart. Same thing happens when you inquire. Many people mistake this about the inquiry. They feel like, 'If I was to calculate the value of the speed of light or of momentum or something, I just have to look at all the variables and keep asking myself the right questions, and then you see, I will be able to crack that through the brute force of my intellect.' But the inquiry into 'Who am I?' is very different.

You ask yourself very sincerely, but you cannot answer that question ever for yourself. Only God has that capacity to give us the answer. No matter how perfect, textbook our practice may be—we may have memorized everything Bhagavan Ramana Maharshi ever said and are just doing it scientifically with precision, no thought escapes us, we grab it and say, 'Who witnesses that every thought?'—and yet the insight that 'I am That' comes only by Grace. So we have to pay full tuition, and yet we are not entitled. What is tuition? Full dedication, full surrender to God. Then what happens? That which seemed like a dark, empty place starts to light up, not necessarily with a perceivable light—that may be a byproduct, an outpouring.

Some of you may find some perceivable light within your heart, or love, peace, joy—all these things are bound to come. But you recognize there that it is an outpouring, isn't it? It is a byproduct; it is not the source in itself. All of us recognize that if you are sitting and praying or really inquiring truly, if it is His Grace, then this kind of outpouring will come from time to time, that you feel so much joy, so much peace, so much love. All this can come, but you recognize that something deeper is the source of all of this. This is the unperceivable light of the Atma within.

So we've let go of the false 'me,' we are following the method which our teacher has told us, and we are visiting our holy sanctum sanctorum within where the Atma resides. Now, it's very strange to say something like 'unperceivable light.' Unperceivable and light? How can it be, isn't it? So it's almost like a Zen koan. How can it be unperceivable and light? And it can feel like, 'I was with you till that point, there you lost me, because what is that?' So then that is an introduction to intuitive insight. That which is beyond perception, that which is beyond conceptualization and thinking. That intuitive insight which is the gift of the Atma when we take on the discipleship of the Atma within and we become a disciple of the Holy Spirit, the Satguru, the Vishwaguru, whichever term you want to use.

When we offer ourselves up in surrender to God, then intuitively we start coming to deeper realms of recognition. Now I'm going to push everyone a bit and say that if your attempt is not to come to Atma—which is basically God's presence within yourself—then you're leading a zombie life. This will be another anti-marketing to say, then I'll go as far as to say that we've not lived at all. We've taken this dream to be the only reality and we will be born into this zombie life and we will die. Everything comes and everything goes and all will be forgotten, no matter what great things we did here. But if you find God, then you have a chance at eternal life.

What does that mean? It means that otherwise we are not living at all. When we come to the Giver of life, the Creator of life, that is the point at which we can say that this is true life. Let me put it another way. If I said to all of you, just imagine the one that you admire the most in the world—it can be a great scientist, it can be a movie star, it can be whatever you want, a great humanitarian, social worker—and somebody said to you that you can come into a mentorship or tutelage of that one, the greatest one in your eyes. You can learn whatever you want from that one; he is available and willing to teach you. To what length will you go for this discipleship, for this tutelage?

And it doesn't have to be someone in the body. Suppose you admire Gandhi, Gandhi Ji, and someone came and told you that Gandhi Ji can actually teach you the right way of life and all you have to do is this, this, this. And you really loved him all your life—suppose you really loved him—then at what point will you say, 'No, I can't do this, I can't go beyond this'? If there's true love and admiration and devotion, you will not set a boundary for yourself. If you have to fly tomorrow to Timbuktu, you will fly. And I'm not talking about external things, but just to illustrate.

You know that many children love these movie stars, so if they had a chance that you can meet this one, they'll do anything. They'll fly across the world, they'll not sleep, they'll be jet-lagged, they'll fly economy, whatever, to meet their icon. And here in Satsang you're hearing that God can be found within yourself, and mostly not in our mental or verbal reaction but in our action, it's like, 'Okay, we'll see,' or skepticism, 'Easier said than done,' 'It can't happen for me.' 'Easy for him to talk.' All of these things are very natural as reactions when you hear something like this.

But I want to be clear, because I want to be clear with God about this, that I want to live this life only serving Him, you see. So I want to be clear with all of you that I'm making it loud and clear to all of you that His presence as the holy Atma within yourself is a reality and you can find it and you can live in its light. That is my only real job, because that is the true Satguru actually. This one is just an instrument of that. So that living presence, that living reality of God can be found in the form of the Atma within, and the only purpose—not just the main one, but the only real purpose of life—is to come to that discovery and then remain in that holy presence of God. From there everything can unfold.

And I realize that this is very contrary to everything we hear in the world. Even in the era of spirituality, it has infected our world today, which is more about 'God for me,' self-fulfilling, smallest self-fulfilling, rather than self-sacrificing spirituality. So this tutelage, this discipleship must come true. I can prod you, provoke you, please with you; I can do whatever to get you to that point of recognizing that all other things in life are ephemeral, just vapor. Everybody in India is able to say, 'What did you come with? What will you go with?' and quote many things from the Gita, holy scriptures, but what are we doing about it?

Yes, I didn't come with anything, I will go with nothing as well, but if this invitation is there that you can find the true meaning of life, which is to find God's reality in your heart, what is that option two which is more attractive? And I'm not saying that this has to be done at the cost of any other things that are part of your life—your family, your job, your relationships. It's not at the cost of that, but it is at the cost of one thing, which is your ego. Because your family and everybody around you are very happy without your ego. So don't fool yourself that you're doing it because you have responsibilities and things like that. It is we that love pride. It is we that want to do things our way instead of God's way.

So all of you heard this many times from me, but if you were to ask most in the world, 'Would you prefer a God-dictated life or a God-assisted one?' what do you feel they'll say? God-assisted. It's like God is available to me as a genie whenever I call Him, He helps me out, it's all sorted. But a God-dictated life seems scary to all of us. And that is why I love the way—and I mention it in every Satsang—it's called 'will' for a reason. It's not a request, it's not an invitation even; it is a command. God's will is actually a command, and that seems very scary to our ego because for us, we don't realize that we are going to be servants either way. We are either going to be in servitude to our mind or we are going to be in servitude to God.

And we don't realize that when the sages told us to become bhaktas, to have this deep love and servitude to God in our hearts, they were pointing us to a deep freedom. Because in servitude to God is our freedom. Again, the mind cannot understand this. How can servitude be freedom? That you have to taste for yourself. But at least we can recognize that when we are operating in the push-pull of the mind, the pings of the mind alone, then at least being in Satsang for some time as most of you have, you must be able to see at least that this is a prison. It is a mental oppression that we call 'my way.' It is the mind's way.

You're not listening to the deeper calling which is coming from the Atma within because we feel like, 'Without the mind I don't know anything, I'll be a waste, I'll be a waste,' you know. But the bad news is without coming to God, we are waste. This is food. All this is made up of food. But besides food, nobody likes hearing that, no? Did anybody enjoy hearing that you're just food? No, nobody likes hearing that because somewhere you know that there is more to you than that. And that is what that prodding is for. Somewhere you recognize that it is not just about this between birth and death for you.

That's why even regular people, not in some civilians, we say that we wish another one, 'May this loved one who has passed, may they rest in peace.' Because if they only considered themselves to be a body or others to be a body, then there's nobody left to wish once death has come. Who are they saying 'rest in peace' to? But the idea of finiteness somewhere in us does not really appeal. Like if you hear that this is going to be your end, you feel like, 'I feel I'll witness even that.' Something is there intuitively, we have a sense of which doesn't accept the fact of an end. There is an eternal aspect to yourself. Where does that come from? What is the origin of that?

We can explore these things because if it wasn't there, then nobody would ever contemplate even the idea of infinity. You have the ability to feel that somewhere, although to the mind it makes no sense. To the mind only time makes sense. So the only escape for those who are truly contemplating life—truly contemplating life—if you try to do it Godless, and I've tried in the past when I was an atheist, I really tried, and it only gets you into this nihilism. It's all meaningless, pointless, nothing is ever anything. But when you come to His holy light, His holy presence...

Nobody would ever contemplate even the idea of infinity. You have the ability to feel that somewhere, although to the mind it makes no sense. To the mind, only time makes sense. So the only escape for those who are truly contemplating life—truly contemplating life—if you try to do it Godless, and I've tried in the past when I was an atheist, I really tried, and it only gets you into this nihilism. It is all meaningless, pointless, nothing is ever anything. But when you come to His holy light, His holy presence in your heart, you realize that life is deeply meaningful. Just that your intellect is too small to grab it. More is coming to say just so, and that is an indication of human pride: that if we don't like hearing that our intellect is too small to understand the meaning of life. And I'm not saying that you can't understand the meaning of life; I'm just saying your intellect can't. There is something deeper within yourself where you fathom these things, but these things that you recognize may be ineffable, so you don't have the words to construct to convey the notion of that.

And this pride is unique to humans because we don't expect any other creature to understand the meaning of life. Like somebody says, 'Oh, I was sitting with my pet this morning and he was telling me the meaning of life.' That sounds absurd, you see. 'I was sitting with some plants and some birds and they were talking about the meaning of life.' We don't expect that of any other creature. But as humans, we have this pride about us; we can understand everything. And if you don't understand, it's not so. We have this problem that whatever we trapped in our sense-making, or whatever doesn't make sense for us, then we feel like it cannot be true, you see. And yet at the same time, when all this intellectual battle is happening, something is constantly calling you from deep within yourself. That longing, that call of the truth, that call of love, that call of a different way of life, moving away from head to heart. That calling is for everyone.

And it would be very easy if what Kabir Ji said was not true, which is that he said Maya, a great artist or the greatest con artist, it makes the Timeless One believe that it is in time. It makes that which gives light to the universe make that one believe that it needs to grasp at and steal from a brother and sister, or become higher or lower than another. All these notions of stupidity. It makes the light of the universe, by its own design—it is by the design of God himself, and our Atma is nothing but the presence of Consciousness—so make that one believe by its own design that it is just a bundle of flesh and blood. So all spirituality, all true spirituality, is an attempt to snap us out of this dream of personhood, of falsehood, of Maya. The Leela can continue, the play will go on if it has to, if it is God's will, but our suffering, our misidentification, our ajnana, avidya, gets cleaned up in the process of devoting ourselves fully to what is inside of us through the process of prayer and inquiry.

Then, what is the prescribed diet? Suppose you want to achieve this, you want to come to this. What is the prescribed diet? Prayer, inquiry. How much? Twenty minutes a day? Forty minutes? It helps, and anything is better than zero. Even to remember, just say 'Ram' once a day is better than forgetting God throughout the day. Maybe your whole life will be transformed by that once. But having said that, as long as you feel like you have the power to do something at all, you must. Japa, unceasing prayer. And what is prayer? It doesn't have to be—well, mostly it will start off as words, but soon it'll become a prayer of your heart where you recognize these words are true. When I say that your Atma itself loves to pray, you're just not in the temple yet, so you can't hear the recitations. And actually, every aspect of your being can become in love with the prayer.

What is a japa? Japa starts where it seems like so much effort, so much effort. Even those who claim mastery over their mind, if you ask them to pray for an entire day, you notice that there's so much mental resistance, mental stuff that blocks you from praying. So much comes up. But it's important to transcend all of those things. So you start; it seems for most of us it will seem like it's a lot of effort. But after some time, you may feel like, oh, but you're just sitting at your computer, you're watching a movie, but you notice that there's a japa going on in your head. It's going on, it seems so effortless and seems like such a gift, especially after those days and weeks and months of trying, trying, trying to make ourselves remember God, chant the name of God. And everything that I'm saying is true for the inquiry as well, that we force ourselves to inquire initially and then we find ourselves organically asking, 'But who? Who?' Sometimes it's not even 'Who am I?' Just 'Who? Who?' This that looking happens instantaneously.

So then what happened? Then you find yourself going deeper within your heart, and for a while it'll seem like your prayer is—you're doing the prayer, but it's coming from a deeper place, like your heart is praying. You're praying through your heart as an instrument so beautiful and pristine. And then as you keep at it, then you realize that that prayer is so deeply seated in your heart now that you just have to turn inwards and the recitations of the prayer are with you. Your life is more and more now in service to God only, enjoying being in His presence. It is from that place that Kabir Ji said that 'I don't enjoy my home now, I only want to be in the beloved's house, in my beloved's house.' There is that. So there are the two homes. The first one is here; the world has conditioned us to treat this as a home. We rely on this for everything. Even the words of satsang for the first many weeks may just be processed intellectually, saying 'I agree, I disagree, I agree, I think...' all that will happen. So the process of defrosting happens over the first few years, and then you start to realize the real project is to move away from there to a deeper place, which is your true home.

So he said nothing really comes and goes; it's beyond this realm of perception. All perceptions come and go. There, everything is. You may taste it, but it doesn't go. It's always there. It's all there. Nothing ever leaves. And in the light of that holy presence do you recognize the source even of that presence: Nirguna Brahman. Nirguna reality is the pure awareness, the pure sakshi, the pure witnessing of all of this. It cannot be known conceptually. We come to that insight in the light of that presence. So as our prayer deepens in this way, and as our inquiry deepens in this way, by God's grace we are gifted by this grace of self-realization, God-realization. It is not a mechanical process. It is a process which is intuitive, full of faith, love, devotion.

Many times it will happen in life that we notice, 'Oh, this boy first you see, and he's just talking and something...' he's like, 'Oh yes, he's here. It's so clear.' And it can seem unfair. It can seem like, 'But I have been coming for a decade, this one just came. That's not right.' You remember that God knows the curriculum best, what is suited for us. So sometimes He gives us a glimpse, sometimes He shows us what is needed to be shown, but it doesn't mean that the cost of discipleship doesn't have to be paid. The 'me' has to be surrendered, the ego has to be given up. And many times it's a test for us because it is very easy to become proud of spiritual insight. Who is it? Somebody said, 'What is the difference between Ram and Ravan?' One had the knowledge of pride and the other had the pride of knowledge. So that in a nutshell is what satsang is about. That is in a nutshell what we are doing here. This is why we gather: to fulfill what seems very, very apparent to me as the highest possibility in the human condition, which is to come to a realization of God within ourselves in the form of the Atma.

But even after the recognition, our work goes on. That's why great, great sages constantly needed to remain with God, because great temptations came also from Maya for the greatest sages as well. Like Narad himself, to almost have started saying, 'Oh Narad, don't be Narad, you know, don't...' It's like Narad, but actually he was a Maharishi, one of the greatest devotees of the Lord himself. But the story is illustrated because it shows us about what is possible in our life. And remember that in our life, we are not at Narad's level where some very beautiful apsara has to come or something like that. I was saying smallest insult is enough. Smallest insult is enough. You're talking to someone and they say, 'Shut up, you don't know who you're talking to,' or 'You're nobody, get lost.' That is enough to forget God. Where am I saying all this from? From my experience. I do all these stupid things. So these—it's important also that these things happen because they keep you grounded, otherwise we keep flying.

So humility, faith, courage, patience, gratitude—all that He teaches us. He teaches us. We don't know how to learn all these things, but if we turn inwards, then He can teach us. If we already think we know, if we are just going by what the outer is showing us, then we don't come into that beginner mode at all, you see. To become a disciple of the Atma, we have to come into the beginner mind. We can't go there and say, 'I know this. What do you think this is? This is what I've learned in my life. What do you feel about it? And I'll know that you're truly the Atma if you can confirm what I learned.' This is our mind. This is the Ravan mind that we have. So we have to snap out of all of this pride and return to the innocence of a beginner every day. Every day start your day by coming to God's presence. Talk to Him. Something is bothering you, keeping you away from His light? Just share that with him as the Beloved, as a father, as your best friend. Doesn't matter what construct you put on it. Bring everything to Him, offer everything to Him, accept everything as if from Him. Give us some water, I'll get dehydrated.

The mind must be the student, but the mind only has to turn away to be a student. All the questions, everything it wants to learn, that has to be very absurd. Very absurd.

I agree with you, but somewhere something rings true, which keeps bringing you to satsang, isn't it? For so many years. What is that? Where is that place within you where that which is beyond the linear—beyond the linear, like you said? It's very beautiful what you said, that how is it that if I was just a material thing, how is it that I'm finding joy in something that I can't explain? It is immaterial for sure. The material cannot get joy from that which is immaterial or beyond material. Where you know that, where do you taste that joy, that peace, that fulfillment, that contentment, that quietness for a second, the stillness for a moment? Where is that felt? It's an aspect of us which we have been taught to forget. That is what you're saying. Turn to this, yes, yes, turn to that. And don't prejudge the rest of it. Don't prejudge the rest of it because then if you prejudge the rest of it, it will seem like, 'Oh, only the mind can speak in words, that God only guides us wordlessly.' You will see that it's too pristine to really put into words, but there's this deeper aspect to your existence which is in the presence of the Atma.

So from this beautiful session I was hearing online a few months back—I shared with all of you also—that they said that even in the world, you see, if we are just sitting with our partner but we are just on our phone, and she or he is trying to talk to us and we are not paying any attention, and then we say, 'Why don't you...' the one says, 'Why aren't you paying any attention or listening to what I'm saying?' and you say, 'But I'm here, no? I'm here. What else you want?' You are here, like you are present, but you're not present actually, you see. So to build a relationship with God, we have to start by being present to His presence, just like we need to be in a worldly relationship. Are we alive to His presence? And this can be exceptionally difficult. Sorry, exceptionally difficult, because it is asked of us to be present first to...

Why aren't you paying any attention or listening to what I'm saying? And you say, 'But I'm here, no? I'm here. What else do you want?' You are here, like you are present, but you're not present actually, you see. So to build a relationship with God, we have to start by being present to His presence, just like we need to be in a worldly relationship. Are we alive to His presence? And this can be exceptionally difficult—sorry, exceptionally difficult—because it is asked of us to be present first, to be inward-facing first, even before His presence is palpable to us. So for a long time, it can feel like we have made ourselves available, but we don't know what is going to be the fulfillment of this. Am I going to actually come to my Atma? Is He going to reveal Himself? Is God going to reveal Himself in whichever way? And then it's even more troublesome because in satsang, he says it's going to be unperceivable yet found. It's all very difficult for the mind.

So it requires a lot of faith. And it really helps if you run out of moves. If you run out of moves anyway, then you don't need that much faith. What else can I do? So both are fine; either are fine. But it's very rare for us to run out of moves, really. So to come to that which is beyond perception and beyond thinking, empty of reliance of grasping onto the 'me,' using whatever method of prayer or inquiry that you resonate with that has been offered by your teacher, and to remain like that unceasingly as much as we can. The effort is to be unceasing. For none of us will it actually be—at least for this one, it is not unceasing—but the intent is unceasing, because Maya still plays its game every day.

So that is the spiritual project in some sense. And I know every day I say that is the spiritual project for completely different things possibly, but in essence, this is what it is, expressed in maybe different ways. But across the board, no matter what kind of satsang you're in, what kind of spirituality you're in, it is to let go of the false 'me,' to turn inward and to inquire, or to pray for His grace to bless us with true insight. Also, like you were saying, you have made it more clear for me when you keep saying God is God. Yes, just God as God. No, the God, the King of the universe, the Lord of multiverses, the Lord of all creation, of all senses and mind, and to be found as a living presence within ourselves as an Atma, as the Atma, that Brahman, you see, but realized as God, Bhagavan, Allah, whatever word you want. It is yes, right.

This is reflecting, Father, on pride and how people resist God. I have resisted in the past and so on and so forth, or what we witnessed today in the conversation that was happening earlier. My observation is that the whole system is rigged. I don't know whose fault, but it's rigged in the sense that—like I noticed it with my son, right? He's sixteen now. A sweet, innocent, curious child, like all of us were. I don't think anyone of us were born with pride or came with some crazy attitude. Everybody's curious, they're thirsty for knowledge, they want to understand the world. But then the first God that they experience is their parents. And they literally see us like Gods. I saw my parents as Gods, of course. And I was very curious, like my son is, and my parents were religious, reasonably spiritual. I mean, they were doing their best, but they created so much confusion. They were not able to deliver to me an experience of any form of divinity, even though they tried their best. Again, no fault of theirs.

And so what does one do as a young person trying to make it through this world of confusion? You resist your parents. Like what I witnessed today was somebody forcing somebody based on a concept. And so then this child develops resistance. Exactly this: 'This is somebody who loves me, who I adore, and I'm going to get screwed in the process, so I'm going to build a defense.' And that then starts manifesting as pride. And what I wanted to share, as what's coming up for me, is pride seems to be a nice cover-up for fear. Right? Basically, if you have pride, you are covering up some knowledge that you think you've gained that keeps you secure in this world, and you don't want that to be shaken. And that's how we just go through this damn life and we don't meet people like you. And it's almost like an infinite compassion to all the souls that are suffering, not because they are full of pride, but they are full of fear. And that's the only coping mechanism they have is this damn ego that keeps them secure. And then they keep managing this ego here and there, running helter-skelter.

And so why I'm saying the system is rigged is we are born into this. And there's one in a million or ten million of you. And so what are we supposed to do? Anyway, I know this is no answer, but that's what was coming up. And I see it in my son, right? Like he's sixteen, so I'm trying to think, okay, I've got lucky that in the end of my life there is some kind of opening and clearing. I have miles to go, but what can I do with my son? And he's open, he's curious, he asks hard questions. And I just did some of the insight inquiry that I've learned from you with him to see if he's open to it, and he reported that he got a taste of that. And then now he uses the word 'beingness,' you know, that's the word he likes. And I don't know where it will go, but at least I feel like through you, one soul may have had hope. And I see that with my daughter. I don't know where it will all go, of course. But again, it's one in a million, one in ten million of you. So it seems very hopeless.

You know why—what really stayed with me when we were talking one day about the mind is that it is a voice in your head. And I don't know, since I've heard that, I just became very sharp about noticing the voice and not conversing at all. I mean, not at all trying; that is my intention. But so, like, it's a moment-to-moment thing. I'm finding in my own practice that I've taken that 'open and empty' to be like this, that I am focused to see when I am starting a conversation at all, anything. You know, I just wanted to share this because it's—you know, I feel like here something—this what I'm saying is nothing so unique and it's been said in many ways, but somehow certain things suit us, right? And for me, in this listening, this really helps me: that it's a voice in your head and there's no need to listen to it. It's like somebody screaming outside or some phone call that's not even for you, and what are you so busy listening to?

And it's a very interesting thing. I used to have this thing that, whose voice is this? Who is giving you this phone call? You say, 'But it's me.' So if it's then your voice, then what is it going to tell you that you don't already know? See, why does it need to communicate in these words to you? So just like this phone conversation that happens, you pick up and it says, 'Hello, it's me calling.' Just like 'me,' the 'me' is telling me that this is what I need to do, this is what I didn't like, this is what is right or wrong. It's all very absurd. Not just satsang, but the day of life, everything that happens in this life is very absurd. And the only way that I have found—I'm tempted to say the only way out of this absurdity, but at least I can say the only way I have found out of this absurdity—is to live in God's light and His presence. And whether you call that open and empty, or you call that nam-japa, or you call it unceasing prayer or forever inquiry, as long as you're not taking yourself to be a 'me' and you're more interested in that which is on the inside than the outside, you're fine.

These days I have resistance to going to the temple. Like, I don't know, my mom has this thing like anywhere we go, 'Oh, this is the best temple, that is the best temple.' And you take—and it is so crowded most of the time, you're irritated because of that crowd. But that absolute resistance, like, you know, it's not giving me any kind of—what do you say—like it doesn't make sense to me. Like, you know, when you're praying and you're in that zone, I don't know why you have to go to the temple. And it's like a very strong resistance, like, 'Who will go and waste time there?' You know, that's how it is.

Yes, yes. I'm unqualified to talk about that because I used to have that very, very strongly. And even now, we don't go to many temples and things like that. But one temple you must not resist going to is now staying in that heart temple. If it takes you to an outer temple, it's fine. And if you notice that you go to a particular temple or some temples where you find yourself easier in your heart temple, then drop that resistance. But if it all becomes just mental and it's all about things other than God—because many temples can be about things other than God—then you just stay in your heart temple. If that guides you to some temple, then that's fine. But for people in the world who are not being introduced in this way to the holy place in their heart, and if they find some peace and solace and comfort in going to temples, churches, mosques, whichever—it's all fine.

When we go to Tiruvannamalai, I don't like going to the temple, but I want to do Giripradakshina. It's like that.

So then try it once. Just try it once. Like force yourself. There's resistance, and if it feels like it helps you go deeper in your heart, then notice that it's just mental resistance.

No, when that resistance happens and then I go to the temple, I really feel good. Okay, I get to the zone. But then until I go there, it's the resistance, like, 'Not to go there. Why should I go there? Why should I stand for so long?'

Yeah, we must look at all of these things then as lifelines. So find at least two or three lifelines for yourself, you see? Like some devotional music, coming to satsang, listening to something, whatever lifelines—going to some particular temple. So create these lifelines for yourself because sometimes Maya will just grab you by the throat so much that you feel like you can't do it by yourself, see? So like I have this playlist for myself. When I feel like the world is so real and things, then I just remind myself to play that playlist to just come back into God's presence and His life, see? All of us need some lifelines to connect us back to God, and whatever the lifeline is, is fine.

And there'll be times you just don't want to do the beads, you just don't want to pray, you don't want to inquire, you just don't want to do it. And it happens here also. Like some days there's just too much happening, you know? You have a new baby in the house, the son just got back from America, all of these things. And this happens, this happens. There's one phone call, something is—some emergency is happening in the sangha. So a lot of these things can come together and you find yourself just in this place where, of course, you went there with your concern, but you find yourself there where you feel disconnected, you see? You feel like—and you don't want to pray. You notice that when you start, it doesn't have momentum. So then you remember, 'Okay, what is my lifeline?' Play that bhajan, play this song, listen to something, listen to some satsang to bring you back.

Because we don't want to have too many of those dead moments in our life. Only lived in God's light is a true moment. And yet all of us will have that sense of disconnection. So first is not to be in denial of it, because our mind has a great ability to deny, like, 'Yeah, yeah, it's all okay.' So it just wants to—because this whole Mahabharat is about time. The mind will say, 'It's okay tomorrow, it's okay tomorrow, tomorrow, tomorrow.' And that tomorrow will never come. Life will be over before that tomorrow comes. So find whatever helps you, and for each of you it will be different, but you know in your heart what connects you. So just use that. But don't go day after day, week after week, sometimes just being disconnected. And just do whatever you—God knows.

To deny, like, 'Yeah, yeah, it's all okay,' so it just wants to... because this whole Mahabharat is about time. The mind will say, 'It's okay tomorrow, it's okay tomorrow, tomorrow, tomorrow,' and that tomorrow will never come. Life will be over before that tomorrow comes. So, find whatever helps you, and for each of you it will be different, but you know in your heart what connects you. So just use that, but don't go day after day, week after week, sometimes just being disconnected. Just do whatever you... God knows your attention every moment, so whatever is at your disposal, use it to return to your heart.

Father, what has your experience been with guiding people in self-inquiry from a teenager standpoint? Amongst all the teenagers that you've met, do you feel that since teenagers presumably are more open, less conditioned, it's easier to get them to see that? Or do you think there's some maturity needed, age-wise? And I know there's no templatized answer. Is there some thing that you felt like, if people get early access to this, then maybe we don't go down this rabbit hole? That's a very good question. In twelve years, has there been an opportunity to take a teenager through self-inquiry? Because my teenagers at home never wanted to hear any of that.

I don't recall, actually, whether I actually ever led a teenager into self-inquiry. I can see that there can be pros and cons. Like, the benefit, of course, is that they're not that deeply conditioned; they're not that much involved in their way of thinking, you see. The openness may be more. Cons may be just that they want to rush through; they maybe want to rush to say, 'Yes, I got it,' because they're so used to school and wanting to do well and things like that. But firsthand, I can't actually say that I recall. I do know that some of the younger ones who came to satsang, they were a lot more open sometimes initially, but they were also in their early twenties or something. I don't recall.

The reason I'm asking that is I have sometimes self-doubt. No, maybe I'm overdoing it because of whatever I've gone through. So as an example, when he comes home from school, before he starts studies, I sit for meditation, like self-inquiry, and have invited him to sit if he feels like it. And now it's become like a habit, which I shared with him, like, 'Don't start... you come from school, take a little break, don't start your studies till you feel your own presence.' And he's begun to sit and, yeah, I have only a sample size of one.

So, no, this is very nice. It's why... when it can't hurt in any way and can only help by God's grace. So if I say 'God,' what comes to you? Just feel free and express.

So, God for me is like... I am a follower of Vishnuji, Ram, and Vishnuji is my favorite. That's what I follow. But I think following Ram gives us more of his traits, as you know, just be polite, don't harm anyone, all that. So I thought I should be more towards Krishna Ji also, so that I can learn the tricks, you know, play smart in the corporate world. So yeah.

And if I was to ask you whether you can say that you experience His presence, then what would you say?

Sorry, I didn't get that.

Whether you've experienced His presence.

Presence, no. But I know that He's there. He's... I mean, whenever I'm getting hurt, I know that He's making sure whoever hurts me... or I mean, this is something which I observe. If somebody hurts me in a bad way or in a negative way, so He ensured that that person will get something in return. It's not like God is... leaving justice to God, yeah, that's what I believe. So that's where I think that He's there somewhere.

Very good. And this is not an interrogation of any sort. I'm just trying to see what God will unfold in this conversation. And by His grace, if you can find a way for you to just come to a simple way to just control this monkey mind, like you said, which is your intention—it's a very good intention to have because this mind is the source of all the trouble. So that is the nature of these questions; it is not anything else. So the sages have told us that God—and you say Vishnuji, Ram Ji, Krishna Ji, all beautiful expressions of God—they've told us about His presence being available to us in the form of the Atma within. What is your sense about that?

That is right. Absolutely. It is in our scriptures and I totally agree with that. But because I'm in whatever we do, we cannot... I'm not able to, you know, be okay with somebody who is... I cannot consider somebody as a God because for me He... because yeah, that is right, that everywhere the spirit is God only, in my and somebody else, even if it is a dog. But I cannot treat the other one as a God because for me He's the Almighty.

Yes, yes. We must not. In fact, no human, even after the recognition that they are that, they are that Nirguna Brahman, because that egoic nature, egoic tendency still remains, so no human should ever proclaim any godliness for themselves. All godliness should be claimed or left for God alone. So that is absolutely right. But I was saying in terms of the coming to the darshan or the Atma Gyan of the Atma. So, Atma or Atma Gyan, do you have a sense of that?

No.

Do you feel like what the sages have told us—and you read a lot of scripture and things, which is beautiful—so about the presence of the Atma within, something resonates as true there?

Yes, definitely yes.

So if I was to tell you—and I've been believing this point before you came to everyone—so I just share in a simple way with you that the way to truly come to a darshan of God is through the presence of the Atma within. That is why the Atma is also called the Satguru presence. It is the only real teacher, the only real Guru, and all other expressions of teachers, of gurus, are just instruments of that holy Atma within ourselves. Now, whether we call that Atma, or we call that Holy Spirit, or we call that Waheguru, or we call that Satguru, the words don't really matter. What is important is to come to a darshan of that, you see. And there is no difference between Atma and Atma Gyan; it is the same thing. But what I've been telling everyone, and I'm telling you as well, that it is very important to meet God in this life, in this living existence that we call life. And our life is not truly life unless we come to that darshan of God. And for that, we must endeavor to come to the darshan of the Atma within ourself, because in that light we can even recognize the Nirguna reality of God as Nirguna Brahman.

So it may be something too strong to hear in the first satsang that you're coming, but I want to almost plead with you, almost provoke you, plead with you, whatever it takes, to get you to make this very, very important in your life: to come to the darshan of the Atma within. Because then, in the light of the Atma, you recognize for yourself the reality of Narayan, of Ram Ji, of Krishna Ji. In a while, we'll be reading from the Ramacharitmanas as well. But my full invitation, my full provocation, is for us, all of us, no matter what age we are in, to really make it primary focus, if possible, to come to the darshan of Atma.

So just like if someone told you that Lord Krishna is sitting in the library section over there and you must meet Him, what is the kind of... what can stop you then from meeting Him? Nothing, isn't it? Nothing can get in the way. And I'm telling you that more than Him sitting in front of you, He is sitting in your heart, and we must find Him. Let nothing come in the way to stop you. Maya will pull all its tricks, all it has at disposal, especially once you make that a project of your life, you see. It'll find all kinds of things to distract you away from God. But you must find the strength within yourself to not get distracted and to make it the most important thing in your life. And then you see that once you make coming to insight about Him your primary thing in life, you will see that all this Maya, this Leela, will take care of itself.

That is my main invitation to everyone who comes to satsang. And I also want to reassure you and tell you that if it can happen for a foolish, stupid one like this one, this one here, then all of you kids are much more sincere, much more devotional, and it's very much a possibility. Because the mind will come and fight with you and say, 'But it's easier said than done, you know, you have to do tapasya in the caves for thousands of years' or something like that. And that is why maybe God has decided to use the most foolish one as an instrument. So you must never let doubt stop you from meeting God or endeavoring to meet God. That's what we are trying to do in satsang.