A Gentle Calling From Within Our Soul - 9th February 2026

So Kierkegaard said, "No risk means no faith." Why is it risky? Why does faith seem risky?

Because we don't know what will happen to this.

We don't know what will happen to this. Very good. And also that the mind is constantly giving us offers of better. If you did this, that would be better. If you went here, this would be better. If you lived here, that would be better. If you just were able to get this much money, that would be better. If only your partner was this one, that would be better. So, all of these things are giving us ideas for our good away from God. And when we say, "No, I am happy to live in his presence, to move in his guidance, in his will," then because we let go of all of these temptations of better, that letting go can seem like a risk.

So firstly, most obvious: a spiritless spirituality is not spirituality; that's like saying a godless spirituality. Secondly, a riskless faith is not faith. Which means that unless I surrender myself completely to God, I hand over my life, I belong to him, my heart belongs fully to him alone, then that oneness, that merging, that divine union, that love most likely does not happen in our lives. So are you willing to risk the best offer from your mind for one moment of God's light? Are you willing to throw away the worst offers from your mind for a moment of God's life? You see, because sometimes in our heroism, we may find it easier to let go of the most exciting sounding thing. But the momentary temptation to waste time on social media, to doom scroll, to do all of that, which are—we know they are the silliest temptation—those we don't let go of because there's nothing heroic about it.

What is it that I'm going to add to my story? If I gave up the million-dollar opportunity to be with God, at least I can feel like a hero, you see. But I gave up ten minutes of Instagram to be with God—who can I tell about this? There's nothing heroic about that. You see, so all levels of offers from the mind must be let go of without any feeling of specialness about it. You're only doing yourself a favor. We're only doing ourselves a favor, isn't it? So firstly, it is important to see the difference in texture between the call from your heart and the call of Maya. Can we notice the difference in texture? The loving call in the heart is quite gentle. It's like the most patient mother in the world calling their child back from play. She's not forcing it. She's just saying, "You must be tired now. Come. You must be hungry. Come." But the mind is saying, "Dance, dance, dance, play with me. Dance, dance, dance." So then we, the child, forget—like children we forget how hungry we are, how tired we are, and we continue in the excitement of the world to keep forgetting that holy call that is coming from our heart.

That's what I'm saying. Yeah, exactly. The hugeness of us, the difference between coming here and sitting here for fifteen minutes versus being somewhere else. And that feel—that fifteen minutes I call you here. You hear that call, you hear like a smile in your heart. You hear everything. Fifteen minutes just to sit here versus that, you know, where it's so tiring and that's like the hugest gap ever. It's really big and it's very difficult. It's very easy. Thank God it's easy here.

Somewhere it has to be easy. The beauty is that as we fall in love more and more with God, you see, then it may be that we are surrounded in the biggest party of Maya but we are not dancing to its tunes. We may be seeming to dance in the world, you see, but we are actually settled in the heart, in God's presence.

I want to ask and I want to also report, these two days that I was away from Bangalore. When I was there, I kept like the chant—I kept trying to come back to the chant. Okay. But Father, in the world, there's certain doubts that would come in my mind like a better proposal of something. Like, all you do is satsang and you stay the whole day, you don't go out also. The whole time is just spent like that. And my mom's calling me—she used a particular word—but like obsessively gone into this. I don't resonate. Conversations—I was not matching with people, there's nothing to talk about also with people. So there's like—I'm not able to go with anything and find a deeper meaning anywhere. It's just because I feel like I know the deepest meaning that you've pointed me to. So that craving is also not there, but these sort of—sometimes it was more like a suggestion and a better proposal of, you know, this sort of a life. And I fight with it with prayer, Father. So I kept feeling like this chanting and choosing this life felt risky, like at times it felt like a risk I'm taking. And it felt like I was trying to swim in something that I've not fully learned how to swim in, but I'm trying to swim. It kept feeling like that.

This is exactly the point I'm making, that faith—to give our life over to God—feels like a risk because you're letting go of the idea of a better life. You see, a more fulfilling worldly outcome, all of these things. So, I want you to all remember one thing: that our soul is like this. Now, it is a lot of work to empty out the garbage, keep it empty, and fill it with God's light. Okay. Now in the world, you will get all kinds of offers to fill it with all kinds of things which are changing, which are ephemeral. There is nothing being offered here which can fill it with something which is constant, unchanging reality.

So anytime the world pressurizes you, saying you're just wasting your life, know for yourself—they may not understand this—but know for yourself that this is the most difficult work ever done by anybody. You see, this is not easy work, and all the sages have testified to this because the many challenges that come as you're emptying the garbage, as you're remaining empty, a lot of temptations will come, dark nights will come, all kinds of aridity will come, dryness will come. All of this will come, you see. And in the eyes of the world, what do you have to show for it? You don't have anything to show for it unless they have clear eyes and they can see your peace, they can see your love, they can see your light. In the eyes of the world, it's a completely wasted opportunity. You see, but I would say attachment to that which is dying is the wasted opportunity.

And all cultures, all religions, all spiritual movements have pointed to the reality of this: how it is possible for us to find a permanent place at his feet. Whether some have called it the Good, some have called it Heaven, some have called it Vaikuntha, some have called it Swarga Loka, some have called it the Greater Place. You see, you may have all different names, but these are reports, testimonies from cultures across the world without any in those days cross-communication. So how did they come to the same conclusions? That besides this ephemeral world that seems to offer all of this, there is a higher place. You see, but to live in that higher place—let's call it God's feet—to live at God's feet in his holy light and love is a lot of work.

You see, you will board only the train that you buy the ticket for. You see, or the better way is the Sufi saying that the master that you work for is the one that is going to pay you. You cannot work for Maya and demand your wages from God. You cannot work for the mind and demand your wages from the Atma. So the master that we serve is the one who's going to pay us. What does the world's payment look like? What is the final payment? Unavoidable final wages: death. You see, and what if the sages told us that God's payment looks like eternal life in his presence? Starting now. Yes.

The master that you work for is the one that is going to pay you. You cannot work for Maya and demand your wages from God. You cannot work for the mind and demand your wages from the Atma. So the master that we serve is the one who's going to pay us. What does the world's payment look like? What is the final payment? Unavoidable final wages: death. You see? And what if the sages told us that God's payment looks like eternal life in His presence?

Even now.

Yes, starting now. And which age? If you take out the last 50 years, or let's take out the last 75 years, which sages told us it's an easy job? It's only in the modern versions of spirituality, you see, that have offered instant sort of solutions. So when your friends, well-meaning parents, others who are well-meaning around us—they're not badly intentioned, they're well-meaning because in their philosophy, in their way of life, this is a waste of time because what do you have to show for it? You see, if you put your energy to work, you have a bank balance to show for it. If you put your energy to God, who can see your soul? Only those with spiritual eyes. You see, that is why it needs a lot of faith. It's a big bet I'm asking you to make. It's a big bet I'm asking you to make.

But the good news is that our soul can be completely merged into the Atma, can be taken over by the light of spirit, which is when you find Him, which is the same as saying when you find your true Self. It is when you find true love, which is when you find true beauty. So when these philosophies will clash, which is that those who are used to filling up themselves with the world cannot understand why we are filling ourselves up with God, and as we are filling ourselves up with God, we cannot understand those who are filling up themselves with the world. And this is fundamental to our existence, isn't it? It is fundamental to mom's existence because that is the way she has lived. So she will give you her best advice, which is that 'this is the way that I have lived and I've lived for 60, 70, whatever years, I cannot be wrong.' You see? Because for somebody to have bet their life on something and then a child of theirs comes and tells them, 'but your way of life or the way you're looking at life may be wrong,' it is not going to be well appreciated unless they've already reached a level of humility because of some life circumstances. You see, they're usually not open.

So when there's a strong philosophy which has been conditioned over 60, 70 years and you are dancing to a different tune, swinging to a different tune, then that is bound to be a clash of ideology in a way, you see. So we have to remain in our humility because humility is the fertile ground for God's light to shine, and to pray to Him, to look towards Him to shine His light. So remember that what you're filling yourself up with is the most important thing, and it's not an easy job. So in the world, if you had to become an opera singer, you see, and you wanted to become the top opera singer in the world and that was your project, then the world won't mind. 'What are you doing?' 'I'm just doing my practice throughout the day, I'm just practicing.' So they know, they can understand your goal, you see. You want to immerse yourself in that talent and to grow in that talent, so that has something to show. But this, which has nothing to show outwardly except for the rare ones who can see in this way through the eyes of the heart, you see, there's nothing to show. So to expect them to understand is quite far-fetched. Okay?

What we have to be careful about is: are we continuing to live in faith through all these temptations of the mind? And it often happens that there's a break from Satsang and then the mind tries, 'What about this? What about this? You can always go back in five years to Satsang, just make your life first.' You see, what is the idea of 'make your life'? Fill it up with Maya. Fill it up with worldly stuff. And I'm being charitable by calling it worldly stuff, in the sense that in some religions, some traditions, you may call it something stronger like the devil or evil or things like that.

Father, sometimes I see that I may not get so tempted with the bigger things, right? But if they come like, I mean, like if some family stuff comes out, then I get really bewildered. And first I would see that I was tempted, then I kind of went past that, but for those half an hour I get so... I actually start getting scared and then confused. I'm like... and I think I feel that I have to handle this on my own and I forget.

Maya is not Maya if we are not forgetting God. Maya is a forgetting, I see. And we think that this bundle, this flesh bucket, is on its own. You see, it is this flesh bucket which is on its own. Not even when we say ourselves that 'I am on my own.' What are we talking about? This bucket of food has to fend for itself and make its life, which is the most absurd idea. Imagine if you saw a tree of Alphonso mangoes and said, 'What is the life it's going to make?' Huh? But all this is also made up of food. What gives it life? What gives it breath? What makes it alive?

Then what to do? A simple solution that came to me on the holiday was also that remember before the break something came in Satsang to say, which is that first wear your life jacket then jump into the pool, you see. So the life jacket is God's name, God's remembrance, staying in His presence, or to self-inquiry—whatever our spiritual practice is, to dedicate ourselves to that, continue to remain in that, you see. And if by God's will He makes some other space available, then use that for whatever is demanded in the moment. In the sense that, suppose that your practice is to say 'Ram,' so 'Ram, Ram.' You see, it's continuing inwardly while these words are being spoken. It's still continuing. Now while the conversation is happening, it can still continue, you see.

So what happens is that you notice that if you're trying to do something too fast, then you may come to the end of it, you see, or a pause in it. And if you're hanging on to God's presence in your heart, then that is a relatively easy way because you can hold on to it even when outer activity may happen. You see, so you're not leaving God's presence. Like Brother Lawrence talked about it, you're not leaving God's presence no matter what may be unfolding on the outside. You see, now the only thing is when we jump out and say, 'This needs me, you know,' so then we feel, 'I have to do this, this sounds like a job for me,' you know. So like this kind of stuff, then to return back seems like trouble, you see. So we try to return to God, and we must try if you've left, but my advice is just as much as possible, don't leave. As much as possible, don't leave. So then you always have your life jacket on and the whirlpool of Maya then cannot drown you.

You see, that must be our intention: to stay with God. The mind says, 'But I'm giving you an opportunity,' and we say that everything is better with God. You see, there is nothing that you can offer to me that is worse because God is here. Isn't it? So the mind says, 'No, no, you fully come, come, enjoy, enjoy, enjoy.' My enjoyment is also better only with God. Come, come. 'We have so much more abundance.' What use is abundance without God? You see, so in that way you don't leave God. Come what may. So the great Indian saint Ravidas Ji said that, 'Now I've got a hold of You. Now it's Your problem. I am not going to leave. I'm not going to leave. You can try if You want.' But the amazing news is, you know what? If you hold on, He cannot leave because His mercy is so much, He just can't get Himself to leave if you hold on. But do you all see this? It's always we say, 'I left God's presence, I returned to God's presence.' That is one limit—I mean, severe taking for granted in the first place, you see. But secondly, it's so beautiful that He's always making Himself available.

This trip that... there were some moments where it felt like I'm drowning, you know? I don't like when the japa was not happening and it feels easier in this force field in and around, you know. Satsang is contagious and kusang is contagious; both are contagious.

You see, so when you're around, when we surround ourselves with people who are worldly minded, then that can seem contagious. It seems like, 'What am I doing wasting time on God?' You see? Then you come to Satsang, then you're surrounded by people who are interested in God in their heart. You feel like, 'What am I doing wasting time in the world?' So that push-pull can constantly happen till one day we are able to take a call in faith saying, 'This is it.' Then when we are surrounded by worldliness, we look for opportunities to turn that into godliness. Then we are sent into worldly company so that it can be changed to godly company.

There were many, many, many moments... felt like rubber, like some... the thermocol, right? Yeah, like... didn't have the joy which we thought they were. Yeah, things that gave me joy a few years before, the same things that I enjoyed, you know, it feels like paper. Oh, no. Like there's no... that also I could see that I was missing being here. I don't know how to say it. Like pleasure didn't... doesn't feel like pleasure. It felt more like pain.

And this intensifies to such an extent that if you go with the mind, then in your heart you'll feel like you are so restless, you're committing a betrayal. You see, you just want to spend time with the Beloved in your heart. Very different, this go.

It felt like a restlessness but in the opposite direction. Restlessness to come back to... okay, bus, now can I please go? I saw the restlessness in the other direction, from wanting to run from out to in.

Yes, very good, because our homing signal, our internal compass gets fixed. Otherwise, initially what happens is that all talk of God seems boring and all wanting outside fun seems fun, interesting. As we learn to live in quietitude, in the stillness of God's light, then worldly things seem to lose their pull on us and God's presence seems the most compelling.

But Father, also because the old habits have a momentum. If they're persistent for some time, then there's that tendency to go with that. Like it feels like going against the current, you know.

Yeah. When we immerse this in a different temperature, then initially there may be a shudder. You see? But if you persist, then that starts to feel natural. Then to switch back seems more difficult. You see? But what has happened to us is that—this is a digression from the question—so what has happened to us is that that wonder in the fact that we can be filled with God's light and His presence is now next to zero. The joy in that fact is now next to zero because we've normalized it so much by talking about it, or maybe not talking about it, but it seeming far-fetched or unachievable or whatever the mental blocks may be in the way that we hear that the Lord of the universe actually lives right here. And our usual response is, 'Me?' That's the absurdity of it all.

But if we heard that—I don't always use Tom Cruise, but we heard that Tom Cruise is buying a house next to us, is going to be our neighbor forever, we'd be much more excited. Who is it in your generation? Yeah. Or is it Timothée Chalamet? Oh, both. She's like, 'God alone for me.' So, but we'll be much more excited. But God lives in the most intimate way in our heart. You see, so what leads to that difference? It's all about Maya, isn't it? So all about the tangibility of sense perception seeming more real to us still rather than commitment.

It's not commitment. It's faith. That's what... commitment linked to conviction is not what I'm talking about. You can commit to being with the name after that.

After that, I don't know. You can say commit to it. Why would you commit to it? Like, I don't feel like any of us is in that age where the teacher says 'commit to the name,' you see, and the seeker says, 'Okay, I do it.'

It's not commitment. It's faith. That's what commitment linked to conviction is—not what I'm talking about.

You can commit to being with the name after that.

After that, I don't know. You can say commit to it. Why would you commit to it? I don't feel like any of us is in that age where the teacher says, 'Commit to the name,' and you say, 'Okay, I do it.' All of us want to know why before we commit. So before someone commits itself, they want to have the answer why. Why would I do this? It is no longer that age where you can say it is the will of the teacher, so therefore I do.

Maya can give another why, so it is a commitment thing. Many whys can be.

Yes, but Maya will not give its own antidote. The thief will not give its own address to you. It may seem many times like Bhagavad Gita for better productivity at work, right? This may help. You see, it may actually work because as we surrender to God, then you're not so worried at work. Those things may happen. But the minute you go deeper, that's it. That's it. Actually, pride is a good counterbalance to anything spiritual. Slightest bit of something and we are like—

We get proud.

Yeah. So we counterbalance all that godliness with the meanness of pride. This is the minute anything starts. Okay, see now, me special, me. Now me special. I'm so great. So that landmine is very difficult to overcome.

Can we have a connection without faith?

Of course. What are you most convinced about in the world?

After certain, nothing.

You may say this politician is a crook. You may be fully convinced about that. I need no faith; it's just a strong mental belief. That's why I'm telling you the difference between faith and belief. Faith is what you know from your heart. Not your emotional heart, not your intellectual heart, not your center of your thoughts—all these can also pose as the heart. But the spirit itself, what is the Atma telling you? What is the Holy Spirit telling you? To follow that at odds with what the mind is telling you, that is faith, to be honest.

I mean, like when I first hear about the truth that we can see, and then the master tells you something and you have to have faith in what he's telling you and all the stages—

In a way. In a way. So it's a moment-to-moment thing. It's like, can I put that painting up with a compass? No. I need a hammer for it. So faith and belief are two very different instruments with very different textures.

No, I'm saying just come there to like what you're saying. Initially, you just have to trust in someone. I mean, I have to trust what you're saying.

What happens when you come to Satsang—not to everyone—but sometimes it happens that you get a tiny taste of what coming to looks like. You see? And that taste then you find only when you go deep within your heart, you see. So it seeds that taste in you. In a way, it's like saying you tasted blood, but you can't taste it anywhere else. So all the billions of shops in the world will not get you that taste again. You see, then you find that fragrance, that love, that holy calling which you felt in the presence of your teacher, you only feel in the presence of the Atma. So then the teacher's role, outer role in the world, is just that: to give you a taste of something which is out of the world. You see, in servitude to that holy presence in the heart, not by himself or herself. That is why you come. Like many children have said, 'First six months I didn't have any idea what you were saying,' you see, and maybe their mind-intellect gives them some rationalization as to why they came, but my feeling is because something got a taste of something which is not available anywhere except in Satsang and keeps bringing us back to Satsang.

But the thing is that that taste, that calling is, remember, like that gentle mother who is supremely patient, who is not worried about time at all. Versus the world of Maya is full of immediate excitement. The funny thing is that many times the opposites of spiritualists are called rationalists. How is that rationalist? You see, how is it not rational to continue to ask what is at the source of this, or how is it not rational to ask, 'But who am I really?' or 'What happens after death?' How can it just be an empiricism in a way in the guise of rationalism? She tends to take what is just appearing to be reality.

The mind's version of it.

Yes. But it also says, 'Let's not go too far with it.' You see, because if it went too far with the rationality, it would bring you to spirituality. So how to empty the jar that I'm doing? How to empty the jar? Take God's name. Remain empty of conceptual belief. Don't fill yourself up with ego, with pride. If you fill it with 'me' stuff, don't expect God stuff. If you fill it with God stuff, then don't expect 'me' perks. What fills up the Antahkarana? I mean, that what we fill it up with is what we are going to end up with. That's quite rational. If it is God, God, God, then it will be God, God, God. If it is me, me, me, then it will be me, me, me. Someone called that heaven and hell.

See, a good way to empty it is also to inquire. The mind says, 'I must do that.' See, so that's an offer of filling ourselves up with that idea that 'I must do that.' So when we ask, 'Who is this I?' we don't give it room to stay. We allow it to come and go. In the same way that when we just remain open and empty, we just allow everything to come and go. Or when we just remain in God's name, just allow all this to come and go. You see, now the difference is that the way this is filled with Maya is not the way it is filled with God. How is it filled with Maya? Are you all with me? What about me? Very good. What about me? Maya is very good. What about me? Me. Fill it up with me. Which means we buy into these notions of ourselves and we collect them. This is called the ignorance, Avidya, vasanas, conditioning, whatever you want to call it. You see, what is the way to fill it up with God?

With His presence.

Very good. Very good. So the way it is filled up is from a different direction, which is God's light, which the Sufis called the dazzling darkness, and you live in the holy light of the heart. It is not a light that you perceive, but it is the light which is transforming you from the inside. That is the light of His presence. The light of the Atma, the light of spirit. You see, but our soul is very primitive. It cannot multitask. You see, it cannot multitask. It cannot 'me, me' and on the other side God permeating His light into it—it can't do it. That is why in the Bible somewhere, God is called a jealous lover. If you're holding the other one's hand, He's not going to share His light in this way. It is therefore the only requirement, as Swami Rama Ji said, is to turn towards Him. He said that if you turn towards Him, He's the only thing you can attain just by turning towards Him. Everything else you have to grab in the world. God is what you attain by turning towards Him.

So unique. The only thing is better.

Yes. Because the process that happens, only He can do. That is why it's called grace. That process of photosynthesis of the soul, from the soul to spirit or from Antahkarana to Atma, that process only He can do. It is not in a language which can be spoken. It is not in steps which are empirical or worldly. Though at best we can do the turning inwards by taking God's name, by doing our practice, by doing our inquiry. What happens? We let go of the faults and we become one-pointed, turned inwards, which is called active recollection. Then to pull us in, to hold us there, is all His job. We can't do it. We don't know how to do it. So many are trying to solve the question, 'Who am I?' It's time to solve 'Who am I?' But as an intellectual exercise, it's only two minutes. No, you see, it can sound like the most intelligent question we are asking ourselves. But what is it? What is the rule of asking this question, 'Who am I?'

I am not that which is changing. So what's so great about it intellectually? I'm not the world, it is changing. I'm not the body, it is changing. I'm not my thoughts, they are changing. I'm not my emotions, they are changing. I'm not pain and pleasure, it is changing. I'm not even my presence, which seems to come and go with waking and sleep, it is changing. Then finished. As far as the intellect can go, finished. No? Then what's so special about it? It causes a lot of specialness. I know in the world anybody who asks these questions starts to feel like, 'Oh, I'm so great, I'm asking these questions,' but it's very rudimentary. The rule is simple. Everything that changes is not you. Okay. So how difficult is it? Changing, changing, changing, changing—work so difficult, you see. But to leave ourselves empty, unattached to that which is changing, and to allow grace to do its work, that is what requires humility, patience, faith, you see.

But what do we do? We do this: 'Ah, that changing, changing, changing. I am that unchanging,' without any insight about it, you see, without any insight about it. And then we rush our intellect to the next. So where is that patience? Where is that humility to wait? To wait at what I call the heart temple, empty of attachment to all of these layers of our existence. That is the point of the practice. Not to say, 'Ah yes, yes, I am unchanging.' It's simpler than third-standard math, no, at the intellect level. You see, so it's absurd that if we practice Neti Neti, we start to take ourselves to be special. You see, because to identify what is changing is the simplest thing; a child can do it. To remain empty of attachment to the changing and to stay empty like that, waiting for God's grace to shine upon us, that is spirituality.

Is it same with the inquiry 'Who am I?'

Who can't ask 'Who am I?' Bhagavan has made it very clear: 'Who am I?' If a thought comes in response, 'I am this, this,' ask again, 'Who is this I? Who witnesses this thought?' You can ask any of these questions. Then what's so difficult in that? The intellect part is not difficult. No, it is the part that happens after that which is not just difficult but impossible, which means that it needs His grace. Do you know how to collect your soul in your heart? No. Nobody knows. Do you know how to just dissolve it? Nobody knows. What do we know? We can turn towards Him through any of these methods. So we must avoid specialness at all cost.

Now, to say God's name, how difficult is that? Ram, Ram, Ram, Krishna, Krishna, Krishna, Allah, Allah, Allah, Jesus, Jesus, Jesus. How difficult is that? Not difficult. So we must not think we are special if we did ten malas or one lakh names or whatever. There's nothing so difficult in that. The point is to remain in that when life's temptations are pulling you from all sides. And life is saying, 'Leave it, leave it, this is important.' To hold on to God's feet when that happens, to be led into the silence through taking God's name, to be led into His holy bedroom and He pulls us in and wait there patiently—that is when our spirituality starts. You see what I meant by our pride grabs us much before anything actually can happen which is tangible, you see, which is beautiful. Our pride will grab us before that only. We did a little bit like that, and that 'me' fills us up. To be so full of 'me'—to be empty and available for God, who is that? Remember that only the mind makes us proud and the heart can only make us humble. The heart cannot make us proud and the mind cannot make us humble. And if we are proud, that means our soul is filled with the 'me.' There's no room for God. And what is pride? Pride of knowing something. Pride is pride of knowing. Have you met anyone who's very proud and doesn't know anything? You can become proud of the fact that 'I don't know anything,' but then you would have to know that. You see, you would have to know that 'I'm special because I don't know.' Socrates. I'm wearing a Socrates shirt, no? So what is his USP? I know that I don't know.

And if we are proud, that means our soul is filled with the 'me.' There's no room for God. And what is pride? Pride of knowing something. Pride is pride of knowing. Have you met anyone who's very proud and doesn't know anything? You can become proud of the fact that 'I don't know anything,' but then you would have to know that. You see, you would have to know that 'I'm special because I don't know.' Socrates—I'm wearing a Socrates shirt, no? So what is his USP? 'I know that I don't know.' Was he proud of that? From his dialogue, it doesn't seem like that. It doesn't seem like it's possible to become... I'm just rambling on and on.

What is the pathway that Maya offers? It's through knowing. That's the trouble. The pathway that Maya offers is through knowing, and the pathway that Atma offers is through innocence. So the fight, the metaphorical Mahabharata, is about time. This moment belongs to God or Maya? God or Maya, which is as good as saying God or me—and Maya is me, which is where the 'me' comes in. And if this moment belongs to God, which means that God is here, then our posture automatically fixes. You notice, you know what I mean? If Ram Ji entered the room, I'm not going to be like, 'Look at me, I'm so special.' Naturally, in the light of His magnificence, my head will bow down. You see? So pride is a denial of His presence in our life.

You see, so anytime I become special about Ananta, it is because I forget Him. Even on this pedestal of sharing Satsang, then I become too like... I like to say, 'I am so cool like that.' It's a sheer forgetting of His presence or a sheer normalization, devaluing of what His presence actually is. We can all keep saying, 'God is here, God is here,' but I rarely meet anyone who is filled with wonder at that fact. No, God is here as an actuality, as a tangible reality more than perception.

So the great Indian sage Surdas Ji said that, 'Lord, please don't take my absence of love into account, my mistakes, my errors, my sins into account. Please don't take them into account, just forget about them, please.' Sweet prayer. But mostly it is we that live like that. It's just that our feelings... then repentance becomes a dirty word. When absence of love is no longer considered a mistake, an error, then what is there to repent? Huh? God has given us the potential to love so much more than we do. But so what? I could be much kinder, much more compassionate, much more inspirational, much more praiseful about God with all my brothers and sisters. But I'm not. It's okay. So what? But there's a difference in check. There's a difference in texture.

Then we notice all of this pride within ourselves, but we also remember that He is merciful. But it's foolishness to just say, 'Okay, because He's merciful, therefore, I can just be unkind, unloving.' I wonder if anyone's getting a sense of what... they go hand in hand. Then we lose self-confidence, which is again a terrible thing to say in the modern world, you see, but we gain God-confidence. Or as Lean posted, 'Godfidence,' you see. But if you're full of 'me,' then can we be full of Godfidence? So first we have to make space.

This is on the mercy and the things. So what happened over the last few days and what I'm seeing inside, I just want to say it out here also. Like, so much pride that 'I'm better than you, Father.' Like, you know, there... I can be the best. Basically, that's it. And it was hard, it was very hard to see that. But there were moments—I was telling Ishana—there were moments when I felt despair, like, 'When will this identity go?' You know, because it's such a deep... it feels like such a deep-rooted identity that just is always like a reflex. I don't even catch it many times. And so that despair of just, 'I'm fed up of this identity,' you know? And then I felt immediately that that was not my heart's voice. That is the same mind that is like, 'It's okay,' you know? Like, it's there. I'm noticing it. God is merciful when He's here.

And if He has to keep it for as long, He knows why it is here still, you know, and I'm working on it. And I felt bad. It was painful. And I feel like it's still lots to see. But that switch is important because I can go into that mind again that, 'Why is it still here?' But it's not my problem in that way. Yeah. You see what I'm saying, Father?

I see. I see.

So that switch just changes the inner, you know? Like, I'm sorry for this, but I'm also grateful. Like, it's both.

Yes.

As though I take control, you know, when I say, 'Why is it still here? Why is it still here?'

That's also... it's like the 'me' that causes the trouble is now responsible for solving the trouble.

It's like a false humility, Father. It's not...

Yes. Doership.

Yeah, doership. Like that. What do I do to get it over here?

Yeah. This is like you said, you have to wait at the door. You don't have any other... it's not your... And also the thing is that, like, this is a very, very beautiful example. Very, very beautiful example because the mind's idea of what makes us highest, you see, is in terms of the outer highestness, isn't it? In terms of the outer, you see. If... okay, let's do an experiment. Yes? Ready? You'll follow?

Mhm.

Okay. Come and sit.

No, no, no.

I asked you whether you'll follow.

I can't do that.

You can.

Okay, I'll sit. Okay, I'll follow. Okay, just please forgive me. Okay, I'm just following you.

No. No. Okay. Okay. It's struggling, making it very awkward.

It's hard. I don't know. Yeah, but still. So, I'll fall over.

I'll just hold it. I see what you're coming to see. It's very uncomfortable. It is... say something bad. Good noise. Just imagine everyone is falling at your feet. Okay. Go slow. Step by step. Please go very slow. Please. Everyone is looking at you reverentially.

You're not helping.

Go slow. Step by step. Everyone just... Radhama needs right now... just all falling.

Can I sit down and we can do this experiment?

No. Say again.

It's all good. It's all good. Say again. I was not falling. Now I was trying.

No, just relax into the chair. Own it. One step. Man, step... I'll die right here. What are you doing? Okay, good. Oh my God. Once all the physical sensations, all those settle... settle in a few minutes. What? What makes it hard?

I can't even look front. Like, it's so awkward.

You can't even look at everybody. It's like so awkward. Try, try one.

No.

Everybody's looking at you.

No. God, stop it. Not helping. I can't look. What is this?

Give it some time to settle. I can sit down and look like from the side. What will happen if this was your life? If this was your life, what would be different? What would be different? What would change really? Nothing in reality changes. Nothing really changes inside. Your primary relationship is with whom?

God.

That... has His location changed?

No.

But what you have now is more temptation in the world. You see, because remember that the ego's replacement for God is to be worshiped yourselves. So then if you find yourself surrounded by people who want to worship you in one way or the other, then the temptation to give importance to that and forget the One in the heart is actually ramped up many times. That is why it's such a dangerous seat to be in, the teacher's seat. And that's why I want all of you to have this experience while I'm still alive, so that you get used to it and you still remember that you're nothing but an instrument for the One who is sitting right there.

It's hard, Father. You see, it's hard because in Maya, you see, like beyond riches, beyond physical pleasure, beyond most things for many is the spiritual elevation. You see, it's the idea of the best, you see, the highest. So you would take a Guru to be higher than the richest man in the world, to be higher than the prettiest girl in the world, to be higher than most positions, isn't it? So this is like the mind's final goal. No, in a way, like the goal.

See, it's not the final goal in the sense that you will notice that once you start getting reverence and it starts to feed on that, it wants more and more and more. It's not rested ever till it gets more and more—more followers, more reverence, more people coming, more all of that, you see. So then the benchmark changes from our time spent with God to all of these things in Maya which are all going to go, you see. And we forget that our only job is to just serve God who is sitting right there, you see, and turn them to their heart within.

When we forget that and it becomes about who's listening, who's coming to me, who's following me, who calls me their teacher, who calls me Ma—when it becomes about all of these things, you see, then what happens is that we ourselves are not able to stay in the heart. And that is why I say that that is a huge disservice to ourselves, although in the world we may be elevating ourselves to where very rare ones are elevated. You see, and that is why the pedestal is so poisonous that I want all of you to experience it while I'm still here to chop if needed. You see, so that otherwise when I'm not here, then I can try and haunt you, but it may not be that effective.

I don't need that temptation, the followers' temptation. I cannot stay in my heart daily normally, so...

Well, none of us really can, but I'm saying that the distraction becomes so much more when we are on the pedestal. You see, because there's then so much more that the ego can feed on. You see?

Yes. This is what I mean. Normally I cannot even stay with God, then with this temptation, it's not possible.

Exactly. Exactly. That's why I would only wish this on those who are learning servitude, who are learning to be in His presence so much, so much more. And I know... but I know that those who are coming to God in their heart also want to share God. So I don't want to be, 'No, you have certificate, you don't have certificate.' All of us should be able to share God, but I want all of you to first see what kind of temptations, what kind of pride can come, what are the dangers, what is the poison in the pedestal, and then get used to sharing. That's very important.

So you're saying that we forget? I'm just saying that, like you said, it feels like the outer is the highest. So that pedestal is higher than actually meeting God in your heart, which is really the highest, merging with Him, which is the true highest.

Even if somebody never knew that, but you would know that you were with God. But we can... Maya is, remember, it's a forgetting.

Yeah.

So it's very easy to replace being in God's presence ourselves by being taken to be God in the world.

Yes. So this outer pedestal would be us forgetting our true high.

Yes. That's what it does. Exactly. Because we exchange the audience of One for the audience of many. So that is like the highest danger because you really truly did maybe find the highest and now you have let go of it for this. You made an exchange. All our stories are full of that. Ravana was a great Gnyani but then got attached to the pedestal of being the highest. Wanted to be higher than Narayana also, wanted to be higher than Vishnu. So, and there's no end to the ego's wanting to be higher than anyone. Ultimately, it won't even leave God. You see, because what the ego wants is to take God's kingdom for itself, for himself, for herself.

Because of this experiment, I feel like it's so evident. The ones in the world that He keeps must be so humble, Father.

You have to be so humble. You see, exactly. Okay. So, Radha, look around at everyone first and then Jyotika will go. Now, look, look, look at... Come on. She's running around. Come on. Yeah, you have to follow. Come. Okay.

Ultimately, it won't even leave God. You see, because what the ego wants is to take God's kingdom for itself, for himself, for herself.

Because of this experiment, I feel like it's so evident. The ones in the wall that he keeps must be so humble. Father, you have to be so humble.

You see, exactly. Okay. So, Radha, look around at everyone first and then Jyotika will go. Now, look, look, look at—come on. She's running around. Come on. Yeah, you have to follow. Come. Okay.

Nothing as brother, I never felt what you're feeling honestly because we all traveling together. I never felt that you felt elevated or some whatever you're saying. So—but I have to also say in her defense that it's something that comes like rarely and sporadically. Yeah. It's not constantly she's sitting there saying—I personally never felt it. Yeah. So if it is coming from when you're at home, that's a different thing, but I just want to share because—thank you. Okay, we can go then we see you day after—I'm going to sit here. It's okay. Just test the cushion for comfortable.

It's just a chair. Breathe. Breathe. Don't die. You see, it's not about the chair. It's just another chair. But it gets sanctity because we remember God sitting on that chair. So this only sanctity is the sanctity that it gets because we remembered God so much sitting there; in itself, it is not anything special. So remember that your job on that chair is to just share His light, to share His love. But you can spot how easy it would be to make it about yourself. Once you relax into it a bit, you'll see everybody looking at you and you'll see how easy it is to get into that stage thing that 'I am the one.' You see, so that is what we have to become immune to that temptation and continue in servitude to God.

So I'm so capable of making this whole thing about myself, like for validation, for like how you said, no, that Father, that it is better than all the riches.

Exactly.

It's better than anything, like how you say just now.

But to retain humility, servitude to God is really better in the sense that in the mind it can seem like the best is to be worshipped. But really what is best for our soul, best for our Antahkarana, is to be elevated in the world and yet retain simplicity, innocence, humility, which is very difficult to do when you have followers, when you have people who are latching on to every word you're saying, looking at every expression you're making. You see, it's very difficult. But all of you must get a taste of it. So that, one, the fascination goes—like firstly this whole guru chair fascination seeming that it's something fantastic goes away—and secondly, we learn how to deal with this additional temptation which is coming because everybody is expecting something from us and willing to revere us. Just sit back. Sit back and relax. Just feel you're on a recliner at home.

Can I say something? Yeah. Such a thing. I've never sat once or twice in the same platform also as you. Never sat on a chair in front of you. Yeah.

But also know that what does a father want most? I want to say this to Radha and to all of you. A father wants most is for the children to surpass him. Go way beyond. You see, but I want all of you to go way beyond in sharing God's love, in sharing God's light. Much may you all have millions of followers, you see, but may it be so that they come to God, that they turn to God. How's the—what was the last—okay, come next. Come on. Now let's go. Let's go one by one. Ishan, go. Oh, go fast. Fast. All of us have to go, but there's comfort in knowing everybody has to go. Yeah. Okay. Come on. Just turn the Zoom also towards yourself. It's actually perfect. This is okay. Just look around. Hello. Not some special vibrations. Either way is the wrong answer. Here come the cool dude. Take the mic.

I don't know. Everybody's laughing at me.

Laughing with you. You deal with that self-consciousness. Father's glasses. Can you see? 27620. She was so chill. Somebody said I said hi to them. Everybody says—come. Can the back bench just come first? Don't worry. We have time. He's shooting quite well. That's the right look. Oh, God. Brothers and sisters, say in the mic if you want to say.

Thank you. It's a very good experience and experiment. Any questions? The boys are very—I think Z up. You can't just close your eyes.

That's true. She locked me dead. What do you want to come? Thank you for the opportunity.

It's off. It actually feels good to sit on the chair. Yes. Um, and I feel that ego would keep me from sitting in this chair. Ah, yes, ever. Right. See, this is also—and ego could also put me on this chair thinking I'm all that. Yeah. Right. Exactly. And so the greatest gift is to sit in the chair in alignment with the Creator. Um, and so thank you for the little taste of that. And thank you to everybody who let me. And it feels like a great honor to sit in your chair. It really does. So, thank you. Am I done?

Yes. If you like, you feel like Saskia.

Father, when you started this, I thought if you ask me, I'm going to have to kill myself because that is my normal default. If I can't cope, I feel like I have to kill myself. God, you know I can't do this. Please just fill me. Fill my heart. God, I know I never can be good enough for you. Please empty this vessel. Empty me completely. Fill me with you. I love you, God. I'm a do.

Two more minutes. Stay. Stay for one moment. That is the right approach because the day we start feeling that 'I can do this,' that is the day we are failing to make that prayer, which is that 'I know I cannot, I'm not worthy of sharing You in any way, but by Your grace, by Your mercy, it is possible.' That's exactly the right approach to take on the chair.

Yeah, but I have to admit I planned that approach when you started this. That's all right. It's all right. And I've always been scared of people looking at me. So, I'm going to look at everyone now. Thank you for this very scary opportunity.

Very welcome.

Am I done now?

Thank you so much for your courage and beauty. Thank you. Come on guys. Come on. I'm used to sitting like this in the office and I have seats where I really have to share because I know more, but this is a time when I know least and everyone seems to know more. So just the div. Okay. What should I do? Okay, turn up. Thank you. Is that the mic? It's okay. I don't belong here. I don't belong here.

That's for me to see.

But I thank you deeply and truly grateful, truly grateful to all my brothers and sisters and I do feel a huge amount of blessing and love coming from you, all of you, and I'm so grateful for that love and I'm so grateful for all the blessing that I'm perceiving just now right here. Thank you so much. It's your embrace, beloved one. It's your embrace. Wherever this foot lands, I pray that it lands on your feet. I walk on your feet always. Thank you.

You can feel so much love also sitting there, just warm smiles. Well, that hardly up. It's only in this experiment. Okay. Make the usual faces of love. Yes. Has it taught him to love God more? That is a mosquito flying around here somewhere. So sit comfortably. Not this half sitting side.

I don't feel anything. I see how much—we can't hear you. Joe, can you take the mic? Not saying anything which you need to hear.

Of course, we need to hear.

Okay. I am apologizing to everyone because I'm really—I feel my pride really deeply and I'm sorry for being so arrogant and everyone who had to listen to my arrogance and bear with it. And my heart is beating so fast. I thought I was very confident but I'm feeling very humbled and um, I don't know how you do it, Father. It's if ever—I mean, the only prayer that is really sincerely and deeply from this heart is that if I, like I said the other day, I can just bless us that can speak from our heart rather than our head now. Just really only from the heart and not—or just keep silent because anything else is a short. It's not true anymore. Thank you so much. Thank you everyone. Thank you.

It's a bit hard, but it's okay. Come on. We are going. Sit here. Sorry. RS has started already. So sweet. How do you feel?

Um, this um, I notice my heart's—just press mute on here. Oh yeah. Okay. That felt powerful. All the perks of Gurudom. But it's nice to see everyone. And I notice I'm thinking, 'When am I done?'

I think that every day. Till Brahar shows you the time three times. Let's go.

So it's all so—like three days ago somebody asked me, 'Who is God?' and for the first time, Father, I simply said, 'I don't know.' And even I didn't realize that why that answer, from where it came. And after some time, generally you know if somebody asks me who is God, I try to explain whatever knowledge I have and sometimes I customize based on the opposite person. But this time it's like, 'I don't know.' And later on I realized, you know, I didn't feel like why I didn't reply, you know, what he will think of me. I felt like, you know, I felt good about it. I feel blessed. I was so content. I was so much in gratitude that nothing came out of me. I said, 'I don't know.' But since that time, all this mind is playing games like, 'You can't,' what they really think of you, not about that, and also it's like how you will spread God's message, you don't know anything. I think today this experience, it's kind of a sign for me that I would like to pledge in front of you that Inshallah, as long as I'm alive, I will continue to spread God's message and God's love. I'll do that, Inshallah. Yeah. And since in the Sufi says whatever you receive from your murid, your teacher, it's like a divine wine. And I can see there is leftover wine. If you allow me, can I drink it?

Thank you. Thank you. Yeah. No, it's Manisha. I know she'll say no. Come on. You have to follow. It's a catch-22. And if you don't follow the one who sits over there, then what is in the chair? Just making guilty.

I'm not guilty. Shining the happiness. What is that corner? They're not—I'm not worthy for sitting here for that. Please.

The chair makes you worthy. Okay, she's doing confident. Hello. Come on now. One 400 W.

I'm glad that I'm so shy. So nervous, Father, but I really want to share God's love and light, Father. I really love—even if people are not interested also, I feel like talking about God. So I'm madly in love with God, but I want to really share, but I'm really scared.

Get used to it.

Just look at it. Nervousness will go, Father. It's a different kind of confidence I have. But when I'm in light, there's so much—I just can't tell that—so much self-image, self-concern, what others are thinking, how am I looking, for so long I'm here. So I'm able to talk and—but yeah, pride should not be. I just want to be no sin. I want to be no sin like just like a kid. And I really like to play with kids, Father, because they're so innocent. Thank you.

How do you worship?

I pray. Um, it's Shiv Shakti but more Shiva. Lord Shiva. Yeah. Yes, Father. If we pray, if we chant, at least for a while we will not be into the mind. That's for sure. So, I'll be waiting for that moment. But with this work and all that, oh God, Father. Yeah. The more and more I want to pray and chant, Father. So much I'm doing so many roles outside, so difficult. See, it's so hard, Father. If we go to office, if we see so many people there, we can't be with God for sure. For sure. For sure. I'm giving so many excuses to my manager that I don't want to go to work, but I'm learning so much that now I know there's the place of God and the place of mind. So much I'm learning, Mother. Thank you so much. Thank you so much. It was not there before like this, Father. But I'll really one day I'll be the instrument of God, Father.

My roles outside are so difficult. It's so hard, Father. If we go to office, if we see so many people there, we can't be with God for sure. I'm giving so many excuses to my manager that I don't want to go to work, but I'm learning so much. Now I know there's the place of God and the place of mind. I'm learning so much. Thank you so much. It was not there before like this, Father. But one day I'll really be the instrument of God, Father. I really want to share, Father. Thank you so much.

Hey. You turn it a little bit towards yourself. How's the views? You should do the washer thing now. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Just come on. You took for years.

Just wanted to say I get quite preoccupied with looking after this one, that there was quite a bit of an interruption in that. It was a quick, you know, light at that activity, preoccupation with myself.

They can't hear you. Pick up a little better. Same volume can fix. Yeah, post-production before I post it, I'll post it. But yeah, being in presence without being distracted is quite tough, especially when you have stories and ideas of everyone and habit kicks in. Never really tried meeting everyone as they are. Very difficult. Really preoccupied to figure out how to respond. Just realize I should stop with the mental commentary. Yeah.

So, question: which has been the most effective pointer for you?

It differed with time. One was the Ribhu Gita. Yeah. So, question was: what was the most effective pointer for me? So, it started with the Ribhu Gita where you let go of all concepts. And then a few other pointers initially from Father about when you're looking for knowing something. This pointer was to know or cognize or be aware. What do you know when you don't know in the traditional way, but you do know in a way? So that was really good. It was like a come back home, come back to yourself. Now I just pray. So scared of meeting everybody's eyes. Always seeking a plan.

That's an important point. When you're put in the spotlight, then the mind scampers for plans and strategies and tactics. So to remain empty on the pedestal takes practice. It takes practice.

Father, can we fit you and the chair in the frame because both can fit?

Actually, both can fit. Okay. But the idea is not that. The idea is to remove the spotlight for me. I should shut up. Thank you. Okay. Let's go to Carmen. Thank you. That's okay. Sometimes it can seem like our prepared answers or prepared things are like a refuge. So we can be confident in that. Sometimes it's all right if something is coming like a beautiful prayer. Even if it is prepared, it is fine. But since it was very apparent that it was like a rescue for you to go to those prepared words, say something unprepared.

So, Babuji, first of all, heart's pranams. This search for the Almighty has been there for some time, again with the grace of the Almighty. And somewhere it is clear that after coming here is where you have shown the direction. Actually, when I think about when Swami Vivekananda spoke to Ramakrishna for a month, asking 'Can you show me God?' and he said 'Yes,' I think my experience has been similar here because you've not only spoken about God, but you've shown us, or shown me at least, that this is the direction and this is what God is. There was a little bit of nervousness, but then I think that what you are showing us, and with so much effort, where like a spring, you know, it comes, it expands when you are around and when I'm in Satsang or when there is remembrance of Satsang and the Lord because of you. Because otherwise, Lord was always a concept. Of course, there was an inner knowing that there is a higher power, but actually knowing that there is a power is that short journey which you've really shown me.

But nevertheless, I mean, 5% God and 95% ego is still there. Maybe more, actually; 1% God and 99% ego is still there. But at least 1% is there. Before that, I won't say it was 0% because there was conviction that there is God. So many saints have helped in giving that knowledge, giving that experience to keep going on. And so many, whether it is a saint in a recorded form, whether a saint in person, whether the book came as a saint, whether it was a hoarding which came as a saint, whether it was a passing comment of a friend, colleague, or a child on the road, or anybody on the road, whether it's seeing the insect on the road—all of those have come as pointers who have said that there is Almighty. So that kept me going.

There's a lot of loneliness which has come in because there has been guilt, shame, there's been a sense of doing wrong. There have also been instances where the sense of doing good has come, and each is a ride. Because finally, it is about whether the restfulness is in that space which you have shown us. Only if that is there, then it is being in Satsang, following your teachings; otherwise, it is anything apart from that. So always the attempt, whether mentally or by heart, is to come back. I want to say something that I had prepared also, that there's a beautiful song by Bulleh Shah Ji and a rendition by one Pakistani singer. He says that howmuchever we boil the milk, it cannot become curd unless we put that curd there. I think there is experience, so it is not about clarity or doubt; it is about the experience that is there.

When I started coming here, earlier whenever I used to go to Satsang, there would be a huge crowd, so there was no opportunity to ask a question to the revered one. And this is the space where there was an opportunity. But then I realized in the first couple of Satsangs that questions cannot be really answered, and the learning comes just by being here. It is apparent that there is a time for every answer, and just by you saying it, it may fasten the process, but the answer will come at the right time, at the right place, and with the right message. That I learned here. I used to earlier ask questions, and then I mean, one good thing is whenever I say 'I' these days, I become very conscious, which is again your blessing. Earlier it was a lot of 'I,' but somewhere there has been this shift where that observant one is there who says, 'No, beware.'

There's a lot of responsibility in this chair, like you say. Fortunately, last month I had this opportunity to, after 12 or 13 years, meet Babuji actually in person. When I say Babuji, it was Asaram Bapu, and I have been his ardent follower. He's also one of the saints who has helped me in this journey. In fact, with all due respect, I think even when he was put under the... but by his grace and God's grace, my devotion increased only, and I think he's the one who sent me to you, and of course with the inspiration of the Almighty. So I got a chance, and one beautiful thing Babuji said—and there were, if I'm not wrong, 70,000 to 1 lakh people, everybody in pin-drop silence—and he said, 'I don't want any clappings, I don't want any ohs, just be quiet.' I could see 70,000 to 1 lakh people in pin-drop silence, and he says that you have not come to meet me. You cannot come to meet me. It is only the light which is within me, which shines through the grace of God, that you've come to meet. And you repeated this just a couple of Satsangs ago, that if this chair makes one prideful of the individual, then that's a disservice to God. That's why this is a huge responsibility. With 1% God and 99% ego, I think I need to, if I talk to anybody, I need to first clarify that this individual has 99% ego and 1% God, so please, you know. So that's all. Thank you so much, Father, for this opportunity.

I remember the first time I met you in F5 and I used to sit here and keep crying, crying, crying. I came with a lot of pain. I was in ICU, you know. When I came to Father, it's like imagine a professional sportsman having an accident, like imagine an F1 crash. I got to Father from there. Slowly Father removed the pain by giving a painkiller first, and then slowly he stopped the painkiller, but he made the pain slowly go away. Then slowly he moved me from ICU to the normal room and then he ensured that I was getting the best support. Then slowly with this encouragement, I walked out of the hospital, right? I started walking normally, but I was missing the sport life. Life was missing it. But by the grace of Father, slowly you learned how to enjoy life.

Sometimes the mind can take this space to be very normal. It's happening every day. Every week he is here. It can trick us. It has tricked me many times. You know, Father is there always, he'll be there always, right? But this opportunity to have a living Guru around us and to guide us is a blessing. Not many people on this earth are privileged. Very few, very few can get so close to what we all have. So with that, I want to share something. I know I'm going to quote again F1. F1 is not an individual sport; it is a team sport. The same way, this walking on the path, while your efforts are individual, it is not an individual sport. That is why they call it Sangha. What does Sangha mean? It means it's a team. Somebody's changing the tire, somebody's putting air, somebody's just talking, giving commentary, so many things running around, right?

But for the Sadhana to really take off, we all have to realize what is Father first of all doing. If I had pain, imagine Father has been talking for so many years. I just realized that if I have to put the number of people who are committed to me, like my mom, dad, the close ones who are so committed to my growth or my well-being, I mean, there can never be anybody who puts the efforts like Father, and I'm sure it's for everybody. If that is the effort a being is doing, then what is the debt we have to pay to Father? It's very heavy. The only way we can pay this is to try to reduce the pain in your hearts, because I've experienced it and hence I'm sharing this. I know a lot of our brothers and sisters go through a lot of pain. There are so many pains, but today's topic is about ego as a person who is sharing God's light only from that aspect.

If any of our Sangha brothers and sisters are going through pain only because of that aspect, the mind is coming. I'm going to pause for some time. If any of our Sangha brothers and sisters are experiencing pain because of that aspect, it is not worth it. You don't have to really go through that pain. And the only way we can not go through the pain is by doing one thing which I feel worked for me—it might work, might not work for others—is to wake up to God. Commit today, this moment. I don't know, they say that if you do something for 48 days, your whole body, there is some shift in the body. Maybe we can all take a Sankalpa today. If this is going to work for you, wake up to God, commit 5, 10, 15, I don't know, whatever works for you, but commit. Just wake up to God. Maybe this might help our brothers and sisters who are going through that pain. Experimentation, right? We'll experiment that. And the second thing is, if you feel that pride is coming within the Sangha, pick a brother or a sister and share openly. Maybe not everybody, but somebody whom you trust.

Whole body, there is some shift in the body. Maybe we can all take a sankalpa today if this is going to work for you. Wake up to God. Commit five, ten, fifteen—I don't know, whatever works for you—but commit. Just wake up to God. Maybe this might help our brothers and sisters who are going through that pain experimentation, right? We'll experiment that. And the second thing is, if you feel that this pride is coming within the Sangha, pick a brother or a sister and share openly. Maybe not everybody, somebody whom you trust. Share it with one Sangha brother or a sister and bring it to the light. And maybe you can exchange notes, you know, just to see how are you checking on, you know, how are you doing? Maybe just experiment it. If it's outside, it's tough. And I'm sure this is a concern about the pride coming only when we are sharing with others, right? So those who share it with others outside, some shared it in a very formal format, some informal. I don't know what to say to them, but I don't have any suggestion honestly at this point. I don't get anything. I think that I'll leave it to Father to say. I think that is what I wanted to share, but this is not something worth going through. That is all and let's not miss this amazing opportunity what we have. We are privileged, very, very privileged. Sometimes we know the value of something only when we lose it. You know how much of good karmas—I know we don't believe in karmas, but I'm just coming with the flow—I know how much of good karmas the soul would have done in the past to have a Guru and this beautiful Sangha which is there around us. I think we take this great opportunity. That's all. Thank you. I would just like to see everybody once and close my session.

It's a big responsibility. I can only stay in silence. I can only stay in silence. Thank you so much. If you get tired of us, relaxing.

No, that's what I mean. You got tired.

No. Very good. Anyone wants to share anything in that respect?

But not you. I don't want any fathers who create his own.

Yeah.

Oh, he said to not say that he's great. Great. It's not greatness. It's like this experiment which he made us do is to show us—I mean, you know, like when you sit at his feet, then everything, just everything you could ever want in your life you'll find there. And I hope never that any chair can overtake that which we get here. That your feet may never... I'm just... now you told me not to see.

Yes, I have to see harder every time you praise me.

Okay, but I'm not praising you. I'm praising God because if I can find Him at your feet, then can you imagine what it must be for you, Father? How you must be at His feet for us to be able to see at your feet, Father, really. Otherwise, I can't imagine how blessed you must be to be at His feet so much that you can show us that just by sitting at your feet. I'm really sorry what you have to... Okay, Father. If I may, I would put myself in that chair just to shed my arrogance and seek humility.

It's very good. It's very good. How do you want to get that feeling? Should we put the laptop on the chair?

Oh, no. I'm already in the chair. You don't have to do so much physically. I think you can turn the computer so she faces everyone. I'm already facing you guys. Thank you so much. It's just... I just put myself in the chair whenever you guys came and I'm very grateful. I just wanted to take this opportunity, Father, and seek your blessing to destroy this arrogance and bring more humility in my heart. I guess invite God's grace enlightening all these opportunities that are being given to me and I'm running away of. I just wish that never I take anything as mine and I may destroy this idea of a doer. I know and acknowledge that I belong to Him. And it's only by His grace that I can feel love and gratitude and His presence in my heart. And I have the benefit of being part of this beautiful Sangha and the benefit of my masters. And if there is something I want to keep, I just... may that be. I'll be afraid to say it's taken away, but I don't... Bless you. Bless you so much. Thank you, Father.

Thank you. And thank you, Sangha. Very good. So, the idea also in a way turned out to be to try and normalize this outer chair. It may not have worked so well, but it's all right. But to elevate the chair of His presence, the throne of His presence in our heart. And if there's any sanctity in that chair, it's only because the one and hopefully the ones who sit on it will carry that love for Him, that reverence for the One in our hearts. May it never have sanctity by itself or may it never have sanctity by virtue of an individual sitting on it. If it is to have sanctity, it's not about that physical chair. I'm talking about the pedestal in Satsang. If it is to have any sanctity, it is because of the ones who use that pedestal being in servitude to the One who is the only one worthy of sanctity, the only one worthy of reverence, the only one worthy of worship.

So may God bless us all. May God bless this Sangha that after Ananta is gone, after all these bodies are gone, may His love continue to spread. May His light continue to spread. And may it never be about an individual sitting on a chair because that would be such a limited, such a timid way to remember God if it was just about an individual. May this Sangha lead to so much light in the world. May all of you spread so much love and light to all our brothers and sisters. Like someone says, there's so much that is needed in this world. We need millions of teachers of God. So may God bless you all. May God bless the Sangha. May He always keep us humble, head bowed down in His service, never forgetting that it is about Him.

And these are the lessons which I have to learn the most to be a teacher of God. Every day I have to learn to become more and more humble, to serve Him more and more, and to get this Ananta out of the way, out of the picture as much as I can. So I promise you that I keep trying and if I ever falter on the way, then please feel free to point it out to me because I'm more scared of losing face in front of Him than losing face in front of the world. So even if I do feel a pinch just for a moment, please help me to see my stupidity and foolishness so that I return to the only thing that is worthwhile in this life, which is to serve God, to serve His light. Thank you.