Autobiography, nowhere left to turn
Original Marathi from the Tukaram Gatha · About Sant Tukaram
मराठी मूळ
आतां सांडूं तरी हातीं ना पदरीं । सखीं सहोदरीं मोकिळलों ॥1॥
जनाचारामध्यें उडाला पातेरा । जालों निलाजिरा ह्मणऊनि ॥ध्रु.॥
कोणाचिया दारा जावेनासें जालें । म्यां च विटंबिलें आपणासी ॥2॥
कां न जाला माझे बुद्धीसी संचार । नाहीं कोठें थार ऐसें जालें ॥3॥
तुका ह्मणे तुज भक्त जाले फार । ह्मणोनियां थार नाहीं येथें ॥4॥
Tukaram Gatha (Marathi Wikisource)
English Translation
Now if I abandon this path, I have nothing in hand or in my lap. I have let go of friends and kinfolk and become shameless in the eyes of society. I can no longer go to anyone's door; I have brought this dishonor upon myself. Why did right understanding not enter my mind? I have found no place anywhere. Says Tuka, You have so many devotees, O Lord, and that is why there is no room for me here.
We ask forgiveness for any inaccuracies in rendering Tukaram ji’s original Marathi.
In Plain Words
Now if I let go of this, I have nothing in hand or in my lap. I have given up friends and brothers. In the eyes of the world I have become shameless. I can no longer go to anyone's door. I have brought this disgrace on myself. Why did good sense never enter my mind? Now there is no shelter for me anywhere. Tuka says: you already have so many devotees. That is why there is no room for me here.
What it means
Tukaram stands at a point of no return and counts the cost out loud. He has dropped his hold on family and worldly respect and looks shameless to society, yet to abandon the path now would leave him with nothing in either hand. He owns the disgrace as his own doing and confesses there is no worldly shelter left for him. The ache he lands on is the deeper fear that even God may have no room for him, crowded as he is by countless other devotees, a complaint that is really a plea to be claimed.
Autobiography
Tukaram's own account of his life, struggles, awakening, and mission.
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