The Doubt Sati Once Concealed
Bala Kanda, Chaupai 109
Doha 109 · Movement 1 of 2
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Parvati asks Shiva to explain the desireless, all pervading Lord and not become angry at her ignorance. She wants no protection for the doubt, only the method by which delusion can be removed.
She confesses what Sati concealed. In the forest she saw Ram's majesty, became overwhelmed with fear, and never told Shiva the whole truth. Even the cosmic vision did not fully awaken that former mind, and the consequence arrived through separation and death.
That old delusion is gone, but a subtle question remains. With joined hands she asks for mercy and the purifying account of Ram's virtues. Now curiosity is not a test of the Lord. It is love longing to understand him.
The secret once hidden on the forest road is finally spoken beneath the banyan.
Read the passage from the Manas
जौं अनीह ब्यापक बिभु कोऊ। कबहु बुझाइ नाथ मोहि सोऊ।। अग्य जानि रिस उर जनि धरहू। जेहि बिधि मोह मिटै सोइ करहू।। मै बन दीखि राम प्रभुताई। अति भय बिकल न तुम्हहि सुनाई।। तदपि मलिन मन बोधु न आवा। सो फलु भली भाँति हम पावा।। अजहूँ कछु संसउ मन मोरे। करहु कृपा बिनवउँ कर जोरें।। प्रभु तब मोहि बहु भाँति प्रबोधा। नाथ सो समुझि करहु जनि क्रोधा।। तब कर अस बिमोह अब नाहीं। रामकथा पर रुचि मन माहीं।। कहहु पुनीत राम गुन गाथा। भुजगराज भूषन सुरनाथा।।
If there be some Lord who is desireless, all-pervading, and omnipresent, then explain Him to me, O Natha. Do not hold anger in your heart, knowing me to be ignorant. Do whatever will remove my delusion.