Freedom Beyond the Conceptual Idea of Freedom - 2 Feb. 2015

So we can see that the thoughts are just coming and going. Emotions also are there, and different sort of qualitative feeling about them. And how do you experience the body also? Why do you say that it is my body? All of us can check this right now. Become aware of all the sensations in the body, and these sensations are just appearances. Notice where you are. It can seem like you are inside the body; it can seem like you are inside the head. That's only because these sensations are there. But where are you aware of these sensations from? Aren't they just sensations which seem to be appearing in front of you and disappearing in front of you? Are these sensations happening to you? Are you just aware of them?

All this bundle of emotions, soup of sensations—is any of this happening to a tangible entity called you? Can we look right now and find such an entity without using our imagination, without using our minds? Can we find the experiencer of these energies and sensations? Is there anything tangible which you can call a you or a me? Where is the awareness of all of these sensations? Is the body aware of itself, or is awareness aware of the body also? Pick up any sensation in your body, bring your attention to it, and find out who is aware of this sensation. And is this awareness in any way affected by whatever the sensation might be? Whatever the bodily sensation might be, is this awareness touched by it? You are aware of this sensation; this sensation is not aware of you. And in this way, you stay completely untouched with whatever might be happening in the body, whatever movement might be happening, whatever sensations might be happening, because you can see that you are the awareness.

Check if this awareness is concerned by the appearance or disappearance of anything at all. Find out if this awareness has any preferences. For this body is dying; all bodies are dying. But can you die? Can this awareness be touched by death also? Are you really concerned whether this sensation of the body stays or goes? Do you have a preference even in this, or are even these preferences just imagined? Observe if there is any pain in the body, and in most bodies, on looking for it, you will be able to find some pain that you might not even have been aware of. And just stay with it. Don't try to fight it. Notice that awareness is unaffected even with this pain. You have no preference even about pain. Set your body free from the operation of the mind.

This is God's body. The entire phenomenal universe is the body of God, and this body also belongs to being. Just like the entire universe belongs to being, this body is also being's problem. And this being does everything. This Consciousness, this I-amness, is the one doer. So who are you that pretends to take care of this body? Who am I? What am I? Where am I? May all of us be forever free from all concepts about the body. Om Shanti Shanti Shanti. Satguru Mooji ki Jai.

Hello, hello. Can you hear me? Yes, my dear. Hi, Father. I had a question. It kind of arose from satsang on Friday, and it was... I listened back to it because I missed some of it towards the end. And you said, 'If you feel that you're not free, you must come to satsang. If you feel that you are free, you must come to satsang.' Now, satsang wasn't a decision for me to come to; it kind of just happened. It appeared within Consciousness. I wasn't looking for it; it kind of just appeared. And so I kind of just accept that, and it's very beautiful, you know? It's beautiful to be here. But I think you said something almost in the same breath after that, which was that satsang is for the recognition of your own inherent freedom, you know? And so I wonder if what your meaning is is if your belief or disbelief in freedom... if you have a belief or disbelief in freedom, that's not enough. Because there's a realization, a felt realization, that this freedom is beyond all concepts of freedom, of being free or of not being free. That's an experiential thing, that this being, this Consciousness, just is, and all concepts are just really nothing, you know, in the light of what this is.

So I don't know. I mean, it's kind of the resolution of that contradiction. It felt like a contradiction to say in one sense, you know, if you feel you're free, that's a problem, yet satsang is for the recognition of your own inherent freedom. I understand, you know, it can't be on a conceptual level. On a conceptual level, that's not enough—'I'm free,' you know? But on a felt realization, like when we were just sitting there with you, all of us, you know, and feeling that experience of freedom beyond all concepts of freedom, that is a... I can't see that that's necessarily a problem. So, over to you.

Yes, this is very good. This is very good. But you already had the answer, you see, in your question, which is that if freedom is a concept—if you feel that 'I don't have it'—then you must come to satsang. And if you feel that you have it, you see, like something you've got or something has been achieved, then also to come to satsang. Because satsang is not a getting; it is not an achieving, you see. So you're right when you say that there is this inherent recognition that I've always been only this, I've always been only this awareness. But even if you feel that you got something, you see, what is this that we got? You just saw that I've always been this, so you can't really say that it is a getting of any sort.

So if you feel that you must still get something, or even if you feel like you got something, in both ways, in both of those, satsang is still required. Because freedom is this beautiful state of neutrality which is beyond the conceptual idea of freedom, which is exactly what you said, actually. So search for the one who is struggling with this. Search for the one who is struggling with this seeing contradiction. So on one hand we said that if you feel you're not free, then come to satsang, and if you feel that you are free, then come to satsang. And in the next breath we said satsang is to show you the recognition of your inherent freedom. And something there says, 'Oh, but this doesn't make sense. This is a contradiction. How can it be like this?'

So find out who is this one who is trying to make sense of it. Because here we cannot make any spiritual framework out of anything. Like my master says, don't make tattoos out of any words which have been spoken. See, the point of satsang is to make sure that you are free from all mental concepts, even all concepts about freedom. And it leaves you with no proclamations whatsoever. Not even this proclamation that 'I am free.' Not even the proclamation that 'I'm not free,' which is also arrogance, and also the proclamation that 'I am free,' which is also arrogance. So there's a beautiful recognition of what has always been here. And even freedom we cannot call it, which at best we can use as a pointing to say that this is freedom, you are always free, but it's not a feeling or it's not a concept. You still feel there's a dichotomy in this?

Sorry, there's a bit of a delay on my unmute for some reason. Um, yeah, no. I mean, it doesn't really bother me. It was, I think, your advice, your direction that 'don't believe your next thought.' This stuff can arise. I certainly see it as fuel for satsang to just kind of speak it. I imagine it may have been something that might be on other people's minds, but yeah, I kind of thought I need to come honestly with what comes up. And there's been a lot, actually. Yeah, there has been a lot in coming into satsang that didn't bother me before. So I had some sort of fears of, you know, maybe this satsang thing is not good for me. You know, I was okay before. I was okay, I was quite at peace. And then coming into satsang, and you know, there's these feelings of not feeling part of the gang, you know, not feeling part of, not being acknowledged. And all that's allowed to sort of come up and play. And but it doesn't just... it doesn't have the power of belief in it, or maybe momentarily, and then it's seen. And I don't take it too seriously. So I'm here, this is here, and I'm not making any decisions to stay or to go. It just... it's all happening. So I'm very pleased to be here and very grateful to be a part of this, and your presence, Father, as well. I'm very grateful. But I wasn't looking for another Guru, I wasn't looking for satsang. This is just what seems to have appeared, and yeah, we'll see what unfolds. I'm not expecting anything, maybe.

Whatever. Very good, very good. Being part of a sangha, especially if you are involved in some seva, but even otherwise, just being part of the sangha can bring up so much of this conditioning, you see. Approval, wanting to be seen, wanting to be loved—all this can come up and you wonder, 'Where is this stuff coming from?' See, I don't feel that there is anyone in the sangha who feels completely approved of or completely accepted. Everyone, at some point of time or the other, feels like they're being completely ignored by the Guru also, by the teacher also, isn't it? And everyone feels that the other one is the favorite. We once also had this, like this is it in the Hangout, we were discussing that one would consider that the other one is the favorite, and the same other one would say that the other one is the favorite. All this play is very good. It's very healthy. It might seem like it is something...

Or completely accepted everyone. And everyone at some point of time or the other feels like they're being completely ignored by the guru also, by the teacher also, isn't it? And everyone feels that the other one is the favorite. We once also had this, like this is it in the hangout, we were discussing that one would consider that the other one is the favorite and the same other one would say that the other one is the favorite. All this play is very good. It's very healthy. It might seem like it is something this thing, but this play is very healthy because it brings up all this, you know, and all these feelings sometimes we've had since our childhood. All this conditioning from school and from our parents, all this conditioning can stay. This need to be special also in the satsang—there's also this need that all of us will have, which is to be acknowledged as something special within the satsang also. To see that, 'Why can't the satsang see that I'm free?' You see? 'Why can't they see that I'm free?' This is not for David but for all of you. Everyone might have this feeling at some point or the other, which is: 'Why can't they acknowledge my freedom?' All this can be allowed to be burnt in this satsang environment, in Sat, and it comes like this. And I'm very happy that in this satsang we are able to just bring it up and say that this is how I'm feeling.

Okay, can I just quickly say something else? Because I think it's relevant as well. I think part of it is I've been through quite a long process of, you know, a continuous process of self-honesty, of being honest about the internal conditioning that comes up. And I guess I'm a qualified professional now, I've come to... so I think the mind identity, because you shouldn't be having these feelings, you know, you're a qualified professional, you know this, you were fine before. Why is, you know, I guess there's a sense of 'Why is this coming up now?' And it's, you know, kind of a very subtle sort of self-condemnation of 'You shouldn't be feeling like this, it's maybe a weakness or something.' But even that can be seen as well. And it's just, I'm not doing any of this. I'm not choosing any of this. I'm not choosing a feeling of needing approval. I'm not choosing the underlying sense of wanting to be seen or wanting to be recognized. There's no me choosing that; it's just happening. So all that can be done is just to acknowledge, to recognize, and it's all happening for a purpose, I think. So I think the best that can be done is to share honestly about it in order that perhaps, you know, it's seen clearly, the others see it clearly, and then it, you know, will burn really in this fire thing. So it's very beautiful. It really is very beautiful. Yeah, thank you.

This is very good, very good. Asha says, 'Thank you, Father. While doing this meditation just now, I felt the suffocation for a few seconds. Also, I did sense the body itself—is it beyond body or it's just spread out everywhere? Also, I have noticed that when I am in satsang, the voice in my head disappeared in your presence. Thank you, Father. Father, is understanding same as experience?'

So this word 'understanding,' just the other day also we were saying that it is looked at in two different ways, isn't it? So there's an understanding which is like a mental understanding, which is usually spelled like this with a small 'u'. So this understanding of all concepts, all beliefs, all ideas is an intellectual or mental understanding. Then what is called the big Understanding is the recognition, is the seeing what is it that I truly am. You see? So you can say that it is the mental understanding or the recognition, which is the seeing, the cognition right now of what I truly am. That can also be called the big Understanding or the true understanding, the truth.

Bhagwati Ji says, 'Father, I love this satsang so much. It is an absolute fullness of love and truth. Nothing can remain in this environment.' Many of you have struggled with this satsang. Just the other day, N was also saying, isn't it, on the chat, that why is it that some seem special? Some are able to come to Rishikesh, some are not able to come. Some are able to come to you, others are not able to come. All this is just the beautiful burning of all our conditioning. All our concepts, all our sense of separation itself will get burnt in this beautiful... in this beautiful satsang. And you will see that all is just nothing, nothing, nothing. All nothing. All this is just an appearance for you. It's all appearances. There is nobody else but you. There's nobody else but you. And you as a person do not exist.

Now what remains? Because somewhere the person likes hearing, you see? The person likes hearing that there is nobody else but you. Then he says, 'You, but you as a person don't exist.' Then what is that? It's all one seeing, it's all one being. And all concepts are being broken down. No concept is seen to be reliable, not even the words in satsang. You see, so much trouble has been happening here the last two weeks because of some words in satsang. No words here in satsang are the truths. No words here are the truths. They only serve one purpose, which is to break down all concepts. Maharaj also used to say that if you're here to hear the truths, hear the words which are true, then it is not possible because no truth can be spoken.

I can tell you that satsang is extremely potent in breaking down this concept of separation, this concept of ego, this concept of personhood. That is all that is happening here. So after satsang, you might not be able to write a coherent book about the truth, because what truth have you learned? You have only learned to identify all that is false. And you might not even find yourself capable of getting into the satsang business, okay? Because the mind paints these pictures of us, you know, starting and there being this set of devotees that come to listen to us. Some of you will have these kind of imaginations. Then you feel, 'But what do I know that I will be able to tell them? Why would they ever come to listen to me?' They left completely empty, completely empty. And then somehow you see that beings could come from all over the world to see this emptiness itself.

Why do you come to satsang? You don't need to come to satsang to get more concepts, because concepts—the world is now so full of concepts. You can Google any concept you want and you'll get millions of pages about any concept. So if everything is available like this, why do we come to satsang? It cannot be to hear more concepts. So actually, the words of satsang are just like the background music which is playing to accompany the presence of satsang. And sometimes attention, your attention is lured through these words, and very quickly you find yourself in the place of pure presence. A place of pure presence where no words are required. The words can do this kind of job. This kind of job they can do. No concept can give you anything. No concept can bring anything to you. And some way you realize that you had enough of concepts.

Once Mooji Ji and I were shopping. We were shopping in a shopping place in Delhi—I forget the name of the street now, Beadon Pura maybe, somewhere close to Paharganj—and he said that... and the football World Cup or football something was going on, and he says, 'You know why so many buy tickets to go see Messi play, to go see a Ronaldo play? Somewhere when they play, then we experience God for a few moments because they get into this place where there's no mind, and then the magic happens.' Just for this experience of God we go. In the same way, we go to some music concert, we go to all these beautiful experiences that we have; it is to go and see our own presence, to see the own potential for presence, which is to experience God. And it is for the same reason that we come to satsang.

We experience our own presence, our own being unassociated with all of these concepts. Who are you without your concepts? This presence emanating as your own being—is this being not God? Is there any lack in this? Are there any needs which are left? And if you give this question to the mind, then the mind will say, 'Of course, I could do with another million dollars.' And that was a segue into Tara's question, which is: 'Can you talk about the need for money? Sometimes I check my savings and income, then I feel I am lack of money. There is a need for money. So why are some people very rich? Law of Attraction?'

There are many, in fact a huge majority of the world, which will look at your statement like this and say that you are rich. And there are many who will have a million times what you have and feel that they are poor. You see? So in some parts of China where you are, and some parts of India where I am, there are definitely those who don't have a penny to their name. Not a single rupee they have. They just work for food if they can get that work. So then, are you rich or are you poor? And then there are so many who have so much, so much more material than you, and they are constantly running to get more and more and more. So if you're constantly running to get more and more and more, then are you rich or are you poor?

So wealth is not in this. Wealth is not in pieces of paper and the color of your plastic cards. You see, so much of the world is obsessed with the color of their credit card. Is there any wealth in this? Pieces of paper, pieces of metal, pieces of plastic—can they buy you this presence of Sat? Can we touch what you really are? What material can touch you? And what material do we really need? What is it that we need? Can we, in this phenomenal experiencing, can we step out of our body and experience various, various things? No. And what does this body need? Very little actually, very little. You could have a trillion dollars, but right now if you don't have a good chair to sit on, you could struggle. You see? Like this in satsang, when Mooji's satsang happens, it's very good to notice all of these because there's a big rush for people to enter and find a big chair. You see? It doesn't matter if you're rich or... just to find a good chair to sit on during satsang.

So what does the body need? Very, very little. By the way, I'm not saying that you must have an aversion to money. No. No desire and no aversion. There is no aversion to money here. Many of you know, in fact most of you know, that I'm an investor in this realm. I'm a businessman. And that is such beautiful grace because of this grace, then I'm able to just be here for all of you with no pressure of paying any money, with no pressure of having to take care of any of this infrastructure. So beautifully Grace is moving, and Grace knows exactly what needs to be done. Do you know how much money you need? Do you know how much money you need? Exactly what you have right now, because the universe knows what it is doing. But we feel that, 'Yes, yes, mostly it knows, but as far as my money is concerned, it doesn't know.' This can't be right.

And I know this feeling. There was a time where, you know, in the business everything was in accounts receivables, everything was in accounts receivables, and there was 18 rupees in my bank account. So I noticed that these thoughts were coming: 'So what's going to happen? What's going to happen?' So I know this monkey very well. This need for money I know very well. Just know that you are always taken care of. In fact, you don't need any taking care of. In fact, even to say that you are taken care of is not right. You are the caretaker, the caregiver, the only one being. Everything is you. You are the Creator and Destroyer of the entire universe. What paper, what metal, and what plastic do you need?

And then she says, 'Absolutely nothing, thank goodness.' Not sure whether she said that for this question, but this answer fits very well with this question. And then you said, 'So why are some people very rich? Law of Attraction?' This Law of Attraction is also a big myth. You see, what is the Law of Attraction? You're supposed to sit and then you visualize what you want. So who's sitting? Who decided to sit and who decided to say that 'This is what I want'? It's all a big game. You see, all even this is a play.

And then say absolutely nothing. Thank goodness. Not sure whether she said that for this question, but this answer fits very well with this question. And then you said, so why are some people very rich? Law of Attraction? This Law of Attraction is also a big myth, you see. What is the Law of Attraction? You're supposed to sit and then you visualize what you want. So who's sitting? Who decided to sit and who decided to say that this is what I want? It's all a big game, you see. All even this is a play of Consciousness. But suppose even that there was a 'you' who decided to sit and then you said, 'Okay, I know what I want.' But how could this one know what it wants? This mind doesn't know anything about what is needed. It pretends to know that 'I know if I get this, then I'll be happy.' But so many times in our lives we've got like this; we got the partner that we wanted. Are we happy? We wanted some job that was there. We got it. Were we happy? Growing up, it was my dream to work at IBM. And what did I do for most of my time at IBM? I just cribbed about how terrible the company is. The mind doesn't know anything about any of this.

So then what do we want to attract? If we don't know what we need, then what can we attract? What if having more money was the worst thing possible at this point? What if having more money was the worst thing possible? What if it could become the biggest distraction? What if you win a lottery today and you never come back to satsang? Then did you win something? Did you get something or did you lose something? Can hear the jet. So at the end of this satsang, you find out that you received a great inheritance, a million-dollar inheritance you got. And then you say, 'Oh, I must take care of this inheritance because this money should grow, something should happen with it. Satsang I can always come back to, so let me take a month off and just take care of this great amount of money that I received.' Where is Ananta going? Ananta is here only. I can come back. So this one month of satsang, what is it worth? Is it worth less than a million dollars or more than a million dollars? It's priceless, yes.

So I'm saying something. I said it's priceless because there are beings who could go through many lifetimes and yet openness would not come to hear satsang like this. They could earn many millions and trillions and zillions of dollars in all those lifetimes. You know, someone once advised me actually, saying that, 'You see, humans don't value anything which is for free. Because humans don't value anything which is for free, then you must charge.' Charging for satsang. I got this advice once and I realized, yes, it's true that there is this tendency to feel that okay, if something is always available like this Monday to Friday, there's no charge, then it's not so much of some value, you see. Maybe you should sign up for something which takes thousands of dollars from you, but then that will give you some true certificate of freedom. I know there's a part of the mind which feels this way like this. But somehow here, what seems to flow is that if there's enough to be taken care of—this body, this family—then what is the need to charge for anything? It's like taking money from your own children.

So even though it might seem like it is not very valuable, I just can't get myself to start charging for this. What is it? Does someone want to say something? Yes, of course, my dear.

No, I just want... now what you are speaking of, I just want to express my deep gratitude because you are giving all these satsangs every day and for free. It's just a gift. I can't put in words, just thank you. Because otherwise I would not be here if it would not be for free. And you are giving yourself to us every day just joyfully and everything is for free and it's a really big gift. Thank you.

Oh, I love you so much. See, Grace is already taken care of. Whatever needs for this body are there, Grace has already been so kind to make sure that there is no lack here of anything at all and there are no needs here. So then how would I take money from my children? Thank you, thank you, thank you. I'm very happy you got this.

Actually, from the first moment, I'm aware of this, how lucky and happy I am to have you for everything. Thank you, my dear.

I love you so much. I love you, I love you. I'm also very happy that something here didn't move to take that advice. Thank you so much, all of you on YouTube as well: Isani, Deva, Adam, Cornelia, Prama, Canan, and all those I missed earlier. Thank you, Subir. Thank you, David. Thank you, AA. David says, 'Thank you, Satguru. Off to earn some money.' Very good. I'll see you soon, my dear. Have a good day at work. Dr. Canan says, 'You are giving so much of your energy and time for all of us. Great thanks to your family too.' In fact, my wife is working very hard at this moment; she's traveling to Singapore on some work as well. And AA says, 'Yes, I'm the luckiest Chinese that gets to satsang. Maybe the only one.' Only one in satsang? That's so easy to be free. So much love, Cornelia. Journey, thank you, my dear.

I also want to say that this is something that I learned from my Father, you see. Yeah, my Father's son, Mooji's son. He gives so much, so much of himself all the time. If some of you have been around him, you've seen this. He's constantly available for satsang. Sometimes the day starts at 7:00 a.m. and it goes on till 2:00 a.m. the next day. Satsang, satsang, satsang. And all this concept of money and charging is just completely alien to him. It's only now that they're building this ashram; it's a huge project, you see, and so many people rely on it for their staying there. And there's a team that does all the videos and all this work gets done. So then there are still... the entire Rishikesh season will be broadcast for free, you see. Very beautiful. So Grace has been so exceptionally kind here that money has not been a concern in the last few years and doesn't play a part in our satsang at all.

J says, 'Father, my husband's greatest fear is failure and loss of money, greater than death. His company was defrauded by Grace last year. It has been such Grace for him to die to this identity. Maybe he will watch this.' Some of you also know that there was a time that I used to be part of running this very large software company with almost 700 people. And then again like this, we had a partnership which didn't go right and there was some greed and all of that happened, you see. So I also used to say that we were defrauded out of our company, you see. But so beautifully you said that was Grace. It was Grace because there was so much arrogance, so much fear also, so much feverishness about money and growing the company and so much of this stuff.

So if at that point of time somebody had told me that this is Grace, I'm sure I wouldn't have ever spoken to them again, you see. But now I can see. Now I can see that this is Grace. And Grace itself will bring your husband also to this point where they will also see that this was also Grace. Because even if it doesn't become about Mukti or any of this, you will definitely find that there is so much strength here, so much more strength. The fear is not so much, you see. It's good. In fact, I might never have come to Mukti if that company was still there. And in fact, this kind of satsang every day would not have been possible at all. It is pure Grace, isn't it? J says, 'Yes, I keep saying that I would rather be a man who is free from this identity than a millionaire.' It's very challenging for his person.

Yes, you must gauge what kind of openness is there to listen to what kind of words. Sometimes in our compassion and love, we go all out and share what we feel is the truth and helpful. But when someone is like that in those situations, sometimes it's not helpful to say that, 'Oh, this is just identity.' In fact, it can be very counterproductive also. So you should always just pretend to come out of your perspective and get into their perspective, and then empathy can come. And with empathy, what you're sharing is very beautiful. Because if there's no openness to hear these concepts about freedom from identity, then it will just seem like noise, you see. It will just irritate more. But if there is, then very beautiful. If there is openness to hear the truth like this, very direct, then it's very good.

Very nice. We looked at some different topics today: body, money. Usually we don't discuss so much about these things. Good. You see, like this about the body, isn't it? That it's just that these sensations are there, and with the appearance of these sensations, then we start to believe that I must be this. Okay, it seems like some sensations are coming from here, some sensations are coming from here. You see that? Where's the awareness? Is it inside this? Is it inside? No, it is untouched by any of these. I like once Bhagavan had said that, 'Can you truly be only a product of all that you have eaten?' What is this body made up of? It's only things that we have eaten, you see, consumed. Can you just be that? Just all the food and water that you have consumed?

Hello, Oscar. How are you, my dear? Now you can talk to Father. I said, how are you?

I'm good. I'm so happy to see you here.

Do you get my Indian accent?

He says yes.

No school today?

I did have school, but it's finished.

Oh, it's finished. Nice.

Yeah, 6:00 p.m. now.

Ah, yeah, 6:00 p.m. right. My kids are still at school; that's why I was wondering how come you're home. And I forgot about the time difference, you see. And where's Dad? Is he at the ship somewhere?

Um, yeah. He's in Melbourne.

He's in Melbourne now. I see. I love you, my dear. I love you, I love you. Sweet. So much. I know that mustn't be easy because my kids would just refuse to say that. Thank you so much. In fact, we had some house guests; was here, Raj was here. And while they were leaving, we were trying to force them to hug them goodbye. They just refused because they... shyness. Shyness at this age. Oscar is not so shy. It's good. Okay, bye-bye. You can also say that I was just dreaming.

I can see a part of me like this morning... there's this... actually since morning there's a thought that's been... I'm scared.

Yes.

Looks like some part just wants to go back dreaming. It's so familiar.

Yes. This is like so raw, so stark.

I know. But even raw and stark are just labels from the mind.

Yes.

But something just really... like it's so new to feel like this.

It's like that character in The Matrix. Have you seen Matrix? Should have different examples for girls? No Star Wars, no Matrix, no Star Trek. There's a character in The Matrix. So they all discover that this phenomenal existence is a matrix, is a computer program. In the movie, there's one who says that, 'Yes, I know it's a matrix, but I enjoy so much here, you see. I get to eat this great food, I get to be with these people.' Somewhere I'm paraphrasing. It's a very interesting tendency which was portrayed over there that 'I know all of this is a computer program, but this is good for me. I'd rather stay.' So he actually decides to stay within the Matrix. Who could have predicted that I'll be quoting Matrix in satsang? Thank you, Julio.

So my tickets are booked finally. 15th February is when I go to Rishikesh. I know Laszlo was saying earlier that he's got Rishikesh on my mind. You know you'll be right with me, isn't it? Where can I be away from you, my dear? Bh says, 'Love you so much, Father. We are blessed by your presence.' Says she has your living room on her mind. Very good. We are apparently coming to Bangalore in December. How wonderful! Wonderful. That's wonderful news then. But trying not to believe it, I see. Via said, 'So wonderful, Father and Mooji together.' Father, can I say something?

Of course, may I please? Um, it's just some things are coming up. I just want to leave them here. It's about this money. There's a... I don't know if I use the right word now, but a contradiction between... I get money from an insurance because of an illness, and I cannot find this illness anymore. And they have to check every...

Father, can I say something? Of course, may I please? It's just some things are coming up. I just want to leave them here. It's about this money. There's a contradiction, I don't know if I use the right word now, but a contradiction between this... I get money from an insurance because of an illness, and I cannot find this illness anymore. They have to check every few years if anything has changed, and in this year, there's something still not relaxed with it, or I don't know how to say it. I just totally want to give it, to leave it here, to give this over to you. Because I don't have the feeling I can answer their questions; they want me to answer them. I just cannot, still cannot do it. Because their question is: 'Did anything change in the last two years?' And of course, everything changed, and nothing changed in a way. I have no idea, totally no idea, but somehow, sometime I have to answer. So I just put it here, I just want to say it.

And there's another thing I want to leave here. There's an anger here because of something in the outer world, of the people in this world here. Something makes me a little crazy and I'm very angry with that. Of course, there's strong identity with it. It's everything okay, I just want to leave this too. I cannot find words for it, but I just wanted to express it, to leave it here. So that's all. Thank you so much for this.

Thank you. This is very good. And don't plan any response. When the question comes, then just see if the answer comes. And whatever answer comes from your heart, just say it. Don't worry about what is going to be said or not said, what will they think of me or not think of me. Just let it flow exactly like it is flowing. Don't give it to your mind. Okay, I'm running out of battery, so let's have a song quickly.

Okay, my dear, we can play the invocations now.

Om Shanti Shanti Shanti. Om Satguru Bhagavan Ki Jai. Thank you all so very much for being in satsang today. Jai Ram Ji Ki. Jai Jai.