Devotion - 28th October 2024

And how did we actually spend it? Lots of disturbances keep coming and you have to keep pulling yourself back. Disturbances keep coming. So we build our strength in this way of returning, in spite of whatever the distances may be, the differences may be, to come back to God. Can we leave God for something where we think it's not important? In that moment we are taking it to be important. We have decided that this daily activity is more important for me than staying with God. And most of the time it's a—like every time—it's a fraud. It can never be a worthwhile thing. Does that mean the end of activity? No. It means to remain in God's light. So how to make sure that the way our days go, the day went today, does not go every day? And the difference is only that tiniest bit, tiniest bit to steer yourself away from the temptations of the world.

So the cultivation of this devotion may be disturbed by various influences in the daily life. Desires and cravings will continue to trouble the aspirant.

Father, what are you saying about the tiniest bit? The tiniest bit what? The tiniest bit what makes the saint and us? A saint and us?

Just today, three times when Maya called, I went, and the saint didn't. That's it, you see? So it's in that tiny, tiny thing, tiny application. We don't have to be grand, we don't have to be superhuman, we don't have to be special. So just if my attention is being called to something, so I can stay here and still do that. But if my full attention is only... okay, who is this moment for in your life? I start with this moment. It's to abide. This moment belongs to God. It belongs to me? To God. So is God the center? Has God the focus of this moment? Then that's why the three examples: place it as an offering at the Lotus feet of the Lord. This is the real flower that can be offered to the Lord. The child... basically the child thinks of the mother and mother alone, a passionate husband thinks of the wife and wife alone, a greedy man thinks of his money and money alone. So what happens when you first fall in love? You could be talking to someone but your heart is just with your beloved. You could be writing an exam but all you want to do is write their name. I don't know if there's love like that in today's world, but like that. But you have that kind of just focus would be all on that in spite of whatever is happening in front of us.

So can we love God in that way? It's Ram, Krishna, Jesus. Can we love God in that way? So then what happened? That when the cultivation of devotion may be disturbed by various influences in daily life. Remember, Narada Ji has written this, so thousands of years back. So even in those times, the same thing, right? That you have the intent to stay with God. The intention is to stay with God, but Maya is designed to bring distraction. And when it brings distraction, then soon God is forgotten. So to remain in unceasing prayers, to not forget God. Come on, keep your heart with God and stop giving so much value to this dreamland which is not real anyway. It is meant to be a distraction in the movie and it'll distract the hell into us, not the hell out of us. So its very purpose, this Maya, is to keep us in the separation from God, thinking that we are doing something valuable for the 'me'. It distracts us with some value for the 'me'.

So I was talking to one of our marketing teams today and I was asking them, all of this that you created for social media posts, what is in it for the user? Will he make money out of it? Will he feel good? Will he feel like he learned something? Did he feel happy? What is he getting out of it? So we can say 'value add,' but those sound like big words. But a simple way to say value add is that what did they get out of it? So we are constantly looking for what we will get out of it as a 'me'. And many times it is just some entertainment, some approval, some feeling, right? All of these distractions. But trust me that these distractions will pull the hell into you. So keep your love, keep your heart with God no matter what the outer circumstance may be.

What are the types of distraction? Don't just feel that just when we talk about Maya we feel like some entertainment, some like all of these things. But a big part of our distractions also are our problems. 'I can't be with God right now because I'm dealing with this. I have this, I have birth pressure, I have relationship issues, my body is not healthy.' So between the so-called entertaining distractions of the Leela and the troublesome distractions, we are hardly left any time for God. And we feel better when we want to have fun, and we are not having fun when we are feeling caught up in some trouble and some problems, and God is forgotten either way. It's a win-win for Maya.

The sages told us: the devotee knows no one else other than his beloved Lord. The Lord is all in all for him. The Lord is the sole refuge for him. He lives for the Lord and the Lord alone. He works for Him alone. And every line in this is explosive. The devotee knows no one else than his beloved Lord, which also means that everyone that he knows, then he sees as the Lord itself. Hanuman Prasad Poddar said, 'Everywhere I look I see Krishna, except when I'm proofreading.' He said very sweetly. He was the publisher of the Gita Press, the editor. So he said everywhere, but what happens is that when I'm doing this proofreading work, then God is making me do it, so it's fine. But that is the only time where I'm not seeing God everywhere.

Okay, so the devotee knows no one else than his beloved Lord. The Lord is all in all for him. The Lord is the sole refuge for him. What is our refuge? Is it like an externally... like there? Because if it's not coming from within, is it something that I approach it like that? Or like how you say Ramakrishna Paramahamsa, because of surrendering his will to that, everything he's seeing he started seeing as, you know, an expression of God. Like, because for me it's not like that right now, that I don't see everybody as an expression of God. Then do I... you know, which both ways I approach it, right?

So the root of the question could be that the sages told us to love God like a child, to love God as the beloved, and to love God like a greedy man loves his money. These are the three examples they've given. So our question then should be: but how? How should I do that? You see, we can only do that by intending to and by remembering to. The love has to be created by Him, but our intention powers that love. Our remembrance powers that love. So you... we talked about this where we said that if you remember the face of a little child you just saw, love will come in your heart. So remembrance and the intention to remember is how you must not leave that intention. We must not switch the intention away to something for 'me', whatever that may be. This moment your heart should belong to God and your intention can only get you there. Then the unfolding has to happen by His grace alone. Our intention alone can't do it, but our intentions must not switch. Like Shabri Ma, she did not switch her intentions for so many decades. People would have told her, foolish people would have said, 'Come, come, you're already free. All this waste of time.' All these things, all distractions would have come for her. But she had the three attributes. I love the fact that Narada Ji said like a greedy man loves his money. Even those days, the nature of attachment to material wealth was so strong.

So then in that deepening more and more and more, then the outer seeing of God in everyone will happen organically. It will happen organically. You can't force it in. Maybe we can, I don't know, we have to see. Maybe we can. We can if you remember that they are God, that you are God sitting in front of you. Maybe it helps. I guess sometimes if you are getting angry and then you remind yourself that God lives in that being as well, then you kind of try... it's a reason to not be so angry. Is that easier than... so anger to feel, try to banish from my... yeah.

See that when I can... so we are working on our irritation. When we get irritated, then we have to catch that at that point because there is hardly anything as corrosive and creating seeming distance between ourselves and God in our heart as anger. Have you seen that? In that moment we may feel so justified and right and all of that, but within a few moments you realize that in your heart you're so disconnected from God. And it may take you a whole day, if not longer, to return to. And that returning is always by His grace only. There is no guarantee that you can get angry today and then not lose His connection forever. So repent as quickly as possible. Try not to get there firstly, but if you do get there, then repent as quickly as possible and return. Because all this Maya will go away soon, but if you don't spend it in His connection in your heart, then you wasted this life.

A devotee absolutely depends upon God alone. He is in communion with the Lord. He is ever peaceful and blissful. Others run after power, etc., which are Siddhis and like that; they depend on the self-effort. This study of devotion into the system and all these beautiful lines are coming out. Sri Ramakrishna said, 'But there is a thing called unceasing devotion to one ideal. You must love the one ideal with your whole soul.' That is...

But if you don't spend it in His connection, your heart, then you wasted this life. A devotee absolutely depends upon God alone. He is in communion with the Lord; he is ever peaceful and blissful. Others run after power, etc., with siddhis and like that; they depend on their self-effort. This starts devotion into the system and all these beautiful lines are coming out. So, Sri Ramakrishna said, but there is a thing called unswerving devotion to one ideal. You must love the one ideal with your whole soul; that is unswerving devotion. Hanuman could not take delight in any other form than that of Rama. The Gopis had such single-minded love for the cowherd Krishna of Vrindavan that they did not care to see the turbaned Krishna of Dwarka. A wife may serve her husband's brothers by fetching water or in other ways, but she cannot serve them in the way that she does her husband. With him, she has a special relationship.

See, Ramakrishna was ready to start for Benares. He put on his woolen shawl and... okay. Sri Ramakrishna is saying, if a person, while showing devotion to God, is actuated by malevolence, arrogance, jealousy, or anger, then his devotion is tamasic; it is influenced by tamas. If he worships God in the form from a desire for fame or wealth or from any other worldly ambition, then his devotion is rajasic. Can you close the door? Can you hear at the back? A person, while showing devotion to God, is actuated by malevolence, arrogance, jealousy, or anger, then his devotion is tamasic. If he worships God from a desire for fame or wealth or from any other worldly ambition, then his devotion is rajasic.

But if a person loves God without any thought of material gain, if he performs his duties to please God alone and maintains towards all created beings the attitude of friendship, then his devotion is called sattvic, since it is influenced by sattva. But the highest devotion transcends the three gunas or qualities, being a spontaneous, uninterrupted inclination of the mind towards God, the inner soul of all beings. And it wells up in the heart of a true devotee as soon as he hears the name of God or mention of God's attributes. So that unending stream of remaining in God's presence, that is beyond the three gunas.

Tamasic is when we are basically... rajasic is when we are going from a desire for fame or wealth or some other worldly ambition, which are also being a... but if a person loves God without any thought of material gain, if he performs his duty to please God alone and maintains towards all created beings the attitude of friendship, then his devotion is sattvic since it is influenced by sattva. But the highest devotion transcends the three gunas or qualities, being a spontaneous, uninterrupted inclination of the mind toward God—and I would actually say of the heart, like elevating the heart to God. As St. Teresa of Avila said, keeping your heart...

I can understand the first thing said. The sattvic is clear, that you pray to God, or rather your devotion to God is for love of God alone, and you maintain an attitude of friendship and love. So one is God and one is your relationship with the world. So when you say the second one, which is rajasic, grasping for material things and praying to God for grasping, or you are also doing that while praying to God? You're praying to God so that you can be happy, you can get things in the world, your relationships can be happy, all those kinds? And the first one is...

The first thing is that you continue, you pray to God, but you have jealousy, anger, malevolence, grievances—all of these things. Actuated by malevolence and arrogance, jealousy or anger, then these devotions... your behavior is... you're trying to carry both. You're praying to God on one hand, but you also have this tendency for anger, jealousy, pride, um, just all of these tamasic things. Then we are in the tamasic mode of prayer. If we are worshiping God and it's like Diwali, what most people do—that's why I'm saying the first one and the second one are not... it doesn't feel far different.

Because the first one says that if you're praying and you're still showing devotion... you've seen people, they pray, pray, pray, they say they'll do their thing, and then they'll just come out and shout at their daughter-in-laws or something like that. Because all throughout the time where they were praying, that anger was playing on their mind and they couldn't wait to finish the chanting so that they can go and shout or something like that. So that is marred by, actuated by malevolence, arrogance, jealousy, anger; then it's a very tamasic sort of prayer. Like, we cannot really call it prayer at all, but maybe still taking the name of God is better than not taking it at all.

And then there is the other form of prayers, like, 'God, I have so much trouble, please give me enough money, please do this,' you see, which is also better than not praying at all, but it's not as high as prayer could be. So, but it's important to remember that if you're going to sit and worry about this for all the time, it's better to pray about it and say, give it to God and say, 'I have this trouble, please help me with that.' But if a person loves God without any thought of material gain, if he performs his duties to please God alone and maintains, like with a seva, with a servitude, with a sense of bowing down, then that is sattvic. It's very beautiful.

But even higher than that, we're just adding that love flavor to the sattva. So then servitude mixed with love becomes Bhakti. Servitude alone is not Bhakti, and love alone is not Bhakti; both have to be there for it to be Bhakti. So in that deep love for God, our connection with Him remains constant, and that is beyond any guna. Because then everything happens in life where we are anchored to God, and all of this becomes just a flow, just a movement of clouds. I saw something beautiful yesterday, so let me see if I can find it.

Key distinctions in Bhakti. First is Guna-mahatmya-shakti, which is love for glorifying the Divine attributes. He's so beautiful, He's so merciful, He's so kind, He's so loving. To remember those attributes of God itself is a form of prayer. Then Rupa-shakti, which is the love of Divine beauty. So you keep remembering the form of Krishna, you keep remembering the form of Ram and saying, 'So beautiful are You, God.' Then Puja-shakti, which is the love of worship; you love to just bow down and pray to Him. Then Smarana-shakti, which is love of remembering; you're constantly just remembering God. We talked about the power of remembering.

Dasya-shakti, which is serving God. The attitude is always, 'With everything I serve You, everything is serving You.' So remember when one time we were talking about—I had the wallpaper also on my phone at that time—'How am I serving God now? How am I serving God now?' So selfless service moment to moment. Is this moment being spent in the service of me or in the service of God? Sakhya-shakti, which is to love God as a friend, like Sudama. Just feel God is your Sakha, He's your friend, He's always with you, He's always helping you, always there with you.

Then Vatsalya-shakti, love of God as a parent. You just be like, He's a parent. And this could actually work both ways, where you're thinking of God as Baby Jesus, Infant Jesus, or Baby Krishna, or God is your parent. Then Kanta-shakti, which is love of God as a spouse. So the Gopies, most of the Sufis, Rumi, Rabia, all of these great sages, Mirabai, the sakhis of Ayodhya, sakhis of Vraj, all of them considered God to be the spouse. So that's Kanta-shakti.

Then even higher is Atma-nivedana-shakti, completely... I read this beautiful term by Charles Fillmore, which was to offer your consciousness to God. I had not heard it like that before. You offer yourself, you offer your heart, offer your love, offer everything, but your very being actually, consciousness, which is God Himself. But just to offer that, that 'my very being is You, everything, my... I'm conscious, this consciousness is for You.' It's very, very beautiful, you see. That's Atma-nivedana-shakti.

Then Tanmaya-shakti, which is love of complete absorption in Him. So just that samadhi, samadhi, just being with Him. Whether the world seems apparent or it seems like it has vanished, we remain in complete absorption of Him. And Viraha-shakti, which means the love for the pain of separation from Him. Isn't that beautiful? Like, it can sound contradictory, but like Hanuman Poddar, this viraha... viraha means one moment away from Him in my heart, I get restless. When we have that, then our life is taken care of, because Maya will not work anymore. Any moment away from His light, you feel restless, you feel disconnected, you feel not... you feel like a fish out of water. So that is a holy longingness, holy viraha.

As we deepen through all of these, our life is fully lived in surrender to God and devotion to God. I'm enjoying this system so much because in the middle of all of that, there's a verse from the 'Imitation of Christ' by Thomas à Kempis where he says, 'For although I am now inflamed with as great desire as those who are singularly devoted to You'—he's saying the same thing, just one-pointedness, like a child with the mother, like the greedy businessman with his money—'so as those who are singularly devoted to You, yet by Your grace I long for the same great flame, praying and seeking a place among all such ardent lovers, that I may be numbered among their holy company.' So may I be counted among those who are so deeply in love with You that they only think of You.

The grace of devotion is acquired through humility and self-denial. You must seek earnestly the grace of devotion; ask for it fervently. So he's showing us the path to come to this. Humility is needed. Humility, otherwise we'll pick up our will very fast. You cannot say to someone, 'I love you deeply, but I will do just what I want.' Initially, when the love is so deep, you say, 'Whatever You want, I will do,' you see? But when we start regaining our ego, our pride, 'I love You, but I will do what I want.' So with God, that just doesn't work. To love Him means to do only what He wants, and that requires a sheer simplicity and innocence of a child. Because the instant I know something, then I feel I'm right about what I want.

I wonder if I can bring this... just you have to try it out. Notice yourself from a position of knowing, then we are not that open to God's will. It just collapses, collapses that self-will. Then in that innocence, move from there, and that innocence alone, and move from there. Humility and self-denial. Self-denial is just what I said; it can sound like a scary word, but it's not going with what I want, but what You want, God.

Father, waiting for God to move... the other day talking... so one is I stop following my will, and is there a... when you say wait for God to move you, do you mean that I have to wait in that state till I get moved?

Yes, exactly. With empty of your will, empty of all knowing. That's a sheer humility. And then you will see that like a flower blooms, like something comes from your heart. Like the words in Satsang, they just bloom from somewhere without any agency, without any volition, without any wanting to be heard or seen, without any self-consciousness. They just come.

How long to stay in that waiting state? That's what you were asking. That as long as it takes, you see. Now what could happen? You say, 'I'm waiting for You to move me, God.' Now, if God loved us little, then He could play with us and say, 'Now you stay for two months like that.' Then we'll see. But He loves us too much. So I've never seen that in my life, that whole day I waited for Him and He just kept me on my bed. What's stopping that from happening is that I don't wait. That's the only thing that's stopping that God from taking over, is that I don't wait enough.

Is that the diagnosis? We cannot predict God's will, but I would say yes, mostly that we rush and say, 'Now enough, now I have to go to my will because it's getting too late.' Isn't there not enough surrender then?

Exactly, there is still the person in that. Exactly. So that sheer surrender, sure... waiting for God's will can only come in that deep humility of not... or being innocent like a child.

Does waiting include not going with what I've been taught about spiritual practices?

Yes, not even any prayer, nothing. Just... right. Yeah, we...

I cannot predict God's will, but I would say yes, mostly that we rush and say, 'Now enough, now I have to go to my will because it's getting too late.' Isn't there not enough surrender then?

Exactly. There is still the person in that, exactly. So that surrender, waiting for God's will, can only come in that deep humility of being innocent like a child.

Does waiting include not going with what I've been taught about spiritual practices? Yes, not even any prayer, nothing? Just right?

Yeah, with authenticity. If you're like, 'Okay, I'm going to wait, but I'm being guided to not pray but watch a movie,' so just be authentic about that. You have to truly, because it doesn't matter what you can prove to yourself or to any of us; only the audience of One is important. Only how we are in His eyes, only that is important. So why I'm saying that is because the mind has the ability to rationalize a lot of things and it will quickly sell us an idea which will seem very useful and even spiritual at times, you see. So you have to go really slow. Like, what is the way to make sure we are not sleeping as often as we would? Just slow down, because Maya pushes you to rush, pushes you to decide, pushes you to claim, pushes you to know, pushes you to make conclusions. So, the humility is to not go, to wait for God's will, and to be empty. And humility, let's look at it, explore it: it is the absence of pride. What is pride? 'I know. I know something. I am somebody. I have a position.' Now, if you already have all that, then when things are coming from the mind, you align with that. Suppose I know that left is good and right is bad, then when thought says, 'Go left, go left,' you already know, we will have the propensity to follow the mind which is saying go left. Humility is open and empty. Yeah, in a way, you know, like humility is a great ingredient towards us becoming open and empty. So is faith, so is patience, so is courage.

So what does humility say?

Yeah, humility is just like right now, if I say something which is the opposite of what you take to be absolutely true, to be humble enough to accept that there could be something in that. You're getting what I'm saying? That's a very crude way of explaining it, but many times in our day-to-day experiences, we have that approach, you see. But we never ask ourselves, 'How do I know better than these 100, 200 people who I engage with on a daily basis? What makes me so special that I always seem to know the best?' Isn't it? It's the same that even in this room, actually, each of us, especially me given this pedestal, has a propensity to believe that I know better than all of you. But do I really know that? I don't.

But if somebody triggers you, yeah, and you get triggered, that's where the problem is. Don't get triggered.

No, no, correct. The point is not to get triggered, but if you're getting triggered, that means to say you don't have humility because you don't want to accept or even listen to the other person. You still feel that 'I know better' or like, you know, 'Who is she or who is he to tell me what to do?'

So we can't get irritated? And that has been my project for the last so many months, to not get irritated with any situation. Just don't get irritated. Not that I'm succeeding, Master, but I'm trying. So how to not get irritated?

It's true, you're not getting... so just how to not do it is to be humble. Do I really know? You can't get... it sounds like a crazy thing, but you can't get irritated unless you know, unless you're proud.

Yeah, so if we're being irritated, it means we're not being humble.

Absolutely. But how to become not irritated? Practice. It's practice. It's a lifelong sadhana. I feel on my dying bed I may be, hopefully by God's grace if it happens, I may be over it. It's such a normal tendency. Somebody calls you in the middle, you're doing something, they say, 'Sir, I'm calling from this bank,' and all. Very natural to... it seems very natural, but it's not natural. We made it natural. The mind justifies that irritation. But that poor boy is trying to... but that poor one is trying to earn some daily bread for his family. Maybe he can't get some of the jobs, you know? So we don't really know their life circumstances for us to be able to judge them. I know it's sounding absurd, but really contemplate it. We cannot gauge another's life situation, really. Do we really know the one who's calling us on the other end, what is happening with them, what are the circumstances they're dealing with? Maybe if you knew the whole story, we would send them some money to help them.

So then ten marketing calls come a day, we can't be kind each... can we try all? Why is it humility?

It is because otherwise our irritation comes from the fact that 'I know that I am busy and he should not be calling me.' But we don't actually know that.

But that's not pride. It is that...

Pride of knowledge. This is why I'm saying pride may seem like it is only, you see, but it comes from that 'I know better,' you see. 'I know better.' Like when you're working, right, and when you're let's say in the middle of a meeting, you're doing something very important, and that time someone... not justifying this calling aspect, but that time they're actually intruding our space and I'm supposed to deliver something else. Now, if I'm being kind and attending the call or taking an extra minute, there will be somebody else slapping me right now. How do you... now suppose that somebody called you and they said, 'Sir, I need some money, can you send me?' Now that could be a scamster or it could be... what would you do?

Normally I just say that no, no... I'm saying do we know? Don't the scam... or someone scam call me?

Correct. So do we know why that person is in that situation doing the scam? We don't know. I'm not saying send the money. I'm just saying that we don't have to get angry, irritated. I think the way about our... it's more about how we are inward. Yeah, correct. Do we allow our love to be shaken? Are we sending curses their way or blessings their way? Are you sending love their way, saying that whatever situation this one may be in, may God bless them? Now suppose they're scamming people. Suppose they're scamming people, do they need our prayers and blessings or do they need our curses?

Prayers. But if you give prayers and blessings, they will write in that system, 'This one can be attempted again.' More opportunity for blessings.

Now, all of this is operating under the presumption, what I'm hearing is that we are operating under the presumption that the Supreme Intelligence of the universe doesn't know all of this. That we're having to extend our whole life, now we spent on answering scam callers only because God is seeing our kindness, but He's like, 'You will let this be like that, I'm not going to help you,' you see. So if we are kind, I promise you, do the experiment for me for the next two weeks: only be kind and see how much God does for you. Without even realizing, you will see everything moves. And don't keep that expectation necessarily, just forget about that part. That part you can recall, but I promise you that that is my life experience. Nothing He doesn't take care of. He's always done.

Father, I wanted to expose something. I mean, so I pray every time, even if I go for a drive, driving because I'm really scared. So like, 'God move me today,' you know? And even to an extent, 'What should I wear tomorrow for work? Father, move me.' That's the thing, Father. But it's just that sometimes I see this pride, Father, that 'I am with God,' you know? I'm exposing this identity of being your student or whatever I feel, you know, in this part whatever. But there is this pride, Father, of being in God's light, like you know. And every day, like to make chai or not also, I'm like, 'Father, move.' It was... it's literally like that. And like you said, He moves you and the outcome is not in your hand, right? Like sometimes I go, walk into a meeting prepared less and I'm like, 'Father, you move me now, I don't know what to say here.' Right? I do that and I know the kindness and you know, I want to be kind and I am in some ways kind to everybody around me, right Father? But this pride comes and I see it very, very clearly, Father.

The one who knocked so much hammer blows on my pride was St. Teresa of Avila. So I would really recommend reading her autobiography, reading Interior Castle, because the things she says... she has crystallized things which are just germinating as insights in my heart. She's been able to express them and communicate them, and yet she does it with so much humility. It shook me to the core, actually, seeing that. And Hanuman Ji, for example, just hearing him, because he's just... we talk about sages with so much conviction, just like... he is maybe the best example. How can a great sage... we're still reading, the whole country is still reading his words. He's constantly kept saying that, 'I'm the worst, I'm the littlest, tiniest bug at your feet.' So it's very important. Firstly, it's very good that you recognize it. But it's good to recognize it and then to immerse ourselves in the lives of sages who are so humble. Yes, because then we will see that and say, 'Look at this shining star, shining sun in the sky.' Like literally have that thing that, what are we taking ourselves to be?

Father, I feel that in that moment, Father, I feel like I'm like nobody. But you know, after, like the second layer that you keep talking about comes in. And it's not like every time it happens, but it is there. And like you said, it wreaks like havoc, like you know. You tend to be ignorant, you know, at times, and you tend to not be intentional then, you know. But without effort, sometimes it's just in there, you know. It doesn't go.

Yeah. And I've been sharing with you that one day I hope to share satsang with zero pretension, but that has not happened so far in twelve years. That comes in, that shape comes in. Now what happens many times is that when you're being heartfelt, many times you may feel like, or others around you may feel like, you're being proud. And many times when you're being proud and doing seva, then it may seem like you're being... so that is how Maya works. Because when God is guiding you and you love Him so deeply, you feel like it is not... there's not a chance you can go against Him. Then it may appear in the world as if you're being proud. So it's not about appearance in the world, but it's about how you are in God's eyes, appearing in front of the audience of One. That is the importance. So if you can see that you can't be irritated without pride, that itself is a great lesson. And what are we? Just a bundle of dust. All is going to fly away. Nobody's going to remember anything.

So Father, if the irritation comes, then pranam? And to spot it quickly and say, 'I'm going in the wrong direction.' Because if you allow irritation to continue, soon it becomes anger and you can't stop it at anger. That's what my experiment has been, that by the time we're starting to get angry, it's too late usually. So we have to cut it at the level of irritation itself.

Father, what do you mean you can't stop it, right? Like by the time you're already like fuming, then you're already in mist, red mist. So very difficult to return from that. But even brushing under the carpet also is bad, just doing it like for a temporary thing and then you don't let that feeling... you get irritated and then you're just like, you know, manipulating that irritation, but that will end up bursting out even bad.

Correct.

So what is important is that we must not forget the most important thing in this whole equation. So how to prevent it from festering? Because you can say when it is me alone doing it, then it will fester. When it is in coordination with God, in service to God and offering it to God, it flies. So you offer it to God and say, 'Justice is Yours alone, God. It's none of mine.' Then you see it won't fester. But if it's only lip service, of course, then it doesn't help. But as authentically as you can, offer it to God.

Father, I was speaking to someone, so that's why this... I'm sorry, but I failed to say that psychology, psychotherapy is very helpful, but it's halfway there. Because in that, you do it by yourself, assisted by people, but not assisted by God in the sense that you feel like you are doing it and the other one is doing it. If you get God into the equation and...

Of my then you see it won't test, but if it's only lip service of course then it doesn't help. But as authentically as you can, offer it to God. Father, I was speaking to someone, so that's why this I sorry, but I failed to say that psychology, psychotherapy is very helpful, but it's halfway there because in that you do it by yourself, assisted by people but not assisted by God in the sense that you feel like you are doing it and the other one is doing it. If you get God into the equation, then the same methods can be—like CBT is a lot like self-inquiry, it's a lot like questioning our beliefs, it's a lot like the work of Byron Katie. So once God is in the picture, then all this eases out. You learn to love to live in His presence so much that you don't want to hold on to grievances. So if you're not expressing it, you're brushing it under the carpet, you're still holding the grievance somewhere in your heart, and one that is bound to build up and explode. You keep giving it, keep in your heart, your heart temporarily keep offering it over.

Father, I wanted to say about venting. Venting is also giving anger a different form, isn't it?

Venting is a very, very tricky one. It's a very big chameleon. It's one of the—I feel like in the guise of venting we can be very rude, we can be very unloving, we can be very gossipy just in the guise of, 'Oh, that is my—I don't mean it.' How do you know? And then somewhere further I was looking at it closely, the ego gets that feeling of, 'Oh, I just vented and I'm feeling better and now it's okay and I can say sorry.' And it just kind of camouflages the pride in the venting. Look at venting, it's so dangerous. You vented to a possible outcome—three actually. So one is she says, 'You're a fool, you don't know what you're talking about.' So your venting did not help, you're angry at her also besides the one you were venting about. Second option is she says, 'You're very right, very good, you're completely right.' Then you're like, 'Okay, at least I got that approval, then I'm on the right, the other one is on the wrong.' You see, then that could be harmful for your spiritual growth. And the third is that she's neutral. Just knowing that these alternatives could happen, so she's neutral, then you're getting irritated with her saying, 'Why aren't you saying something? Don't you feel like—aren't you my friend? Don't you love me?' So it's very, very crazy, this venting. So no-win situation.

If you were in psychotherapy, there's some law against that, at least in America. You can't bring your beliefs and project that. But internally I can, yeah?

Internally as a psychotherapist you can, yeah. I can, yes, but I don't know how to do that. I'm not like I'm practicing, but whenever I offer support, I go into because I know these—I would see a pattern, recognize it, and then putting it with the teaching and then coming up with the conclusion just like a quick, quick. So one day Gopala was doing his Kung Fu pranic healing thing, so and it went on for a few days. So then I told him that it's fine, it may work, I'm not doubting that and all of that, but what makes it work if it works? So if God did not want it to work, it would not work. So remember the source of it is very important. Suppose there are patterns that you're discovering about the human condition or people have discovered and then you're finding some use to them, then they would not be patterns unless it was God's consent for them to be a pattern for humanity. So to remember the source of where it all comes from and to be in a deeper love and a deeper communication with the source itself is very helpful along the way. We don't have to forget everything about the patterns, we don't have to forget pranic healing on this if you love it, we don't have to do any of that. But I'm saying that we must not forget to give thanks to the One where everything comes from, where all of this comes from, and give it to that One.

See that like when you said to us that God knows exactly how much pain you can tolerate at some moment and He won't give you more, then we can live in acceptance. I mean, that's also letting go of your will, just living in acceptance.

Very, very important, this part. And I feel like it could reduce the level of suffering in our lives so much if we just understood this simple thing: that God knows everything and He would not give you one grain of salt worth of suffering more than is needed in that situation. Like I asked Giri's mom, she was there, I said, 'What would He have to do for you to make him suffer more than needed?' Sometimes as a mother you have to be strong and say, 'I'm not giving you dinner because you've been bad,' you see. But would you say, 'I'm liking the fact he's suffering, so let me not give him breakfast also'? No mother would do that. No mother would do that. So God will not do that for us. Not one ounce more than what is needed only that has been given to us because He loves us that much. He's here, He loves us that much, He's taking care of us fully. He knows everything in our lives and He has the power to change anything at a blink of an eye. If we remember these things, then we can never question. That's why then we have the surrender of Job: 'The Lord giveth, the Lord taketh away.' All the gurus—one guru said that He only gave me and He—you know which guru? His children were lost. He said, 'He only gave to me, He only...' So what is the challenge for Job? The challenge was that Satan said that, 'I will make him suffer to the point that he will curse You also.' And what is a—like curse You? Curse You could be like really cursing God, but it could also be questioning judgment, saying, 'What are You doing? You don't understand.' That's why I've been quite strong in various ways with all of you. Pick up these sort of, you know, judgments about God or anger with God or tantrums in God. Nobody—like a grain of dust saying the sun should not go, it's going too much to the right, it should go to the left. In front of God to do all of that, and that tendency gets us into a different position. So try, try living without anger, irritation, pride, knowing all of that. See what happens to your life. It can seem scary. The mind wants to scare you and say you'll be taken advantage of, you'll become a doorman, all these things will happen. But that is when we forget that God knows everything.

Related to that, that being moved by God, there's this idea there are some safe spaces, like sitting in my room I can wait. But I'm doing something, I'm outside talking to someone, anything, those are not safe. That is what would you say that—that's what you have to work on. So for me, I'm working on those situations where I'm at work and I'm taking a review. So in the review that—that comes up which is like to just not be proud, to just allow all work to happen from His life. It's difficult because he's been working for so long, like more than a quarter of a century, Gyan has been working so—it just becomes a conditioning. But to go into that situation and remember that God is taking care of everything, then He allows everything to unfold from there. But it's not easy to begin this project. Is it better to start off—start everywhere right in this moment is begin this project?

Yeah, all of us are. So what will happen is if you decide that Maya is very tricky and tomorrow you will have a job where you'll have to spend ten hours at work every day. Okay, now there you are okay with, you know, being egotistical and proud. Okay, let me give you more of that. Do you decide that my only good is when I'm with You? If you decide that, then you're not making a linear separation between work life, home, Satsang, outside, inside. Let's say, 'I belong to You fully.' That is the beginning of the project. Just say it. Many times we get stuck because we feel like, 'I will say it only if I am able to do it.' I'm not able to do it fully, I'm not able to do it—it's like you see, but then yet we have to keep, keep immersing ourselves in that, you see. It's like, it's like, 'I'll work out from Monday.' Correct? Monday will never come. That road to hell is paved with good intentions. So we have to start now and you have to say fully that truly I mean it in this moment that my life belongs to You. Just that. As much as we can, moment to moment, just, just offer yourself fully to God. Ram. He said the highest—he, in his commentary on the Gita, is supposed to be one of the best, Swami, and the way he talks about it, Gana Yoga, the way he talks about Mahani, and he said the highest is—yeah, that's what you read also, that Krishna says, 'You just be devoted, lean on Me alone.'