A Constant Offering of Our Heart - 13th March 2026

So often in satsang we talk about how the seemingly different paths of bi and ghana actually are both the same because both of them bring us to this point and based on our temperament whatever resonates with us we can follow that path. So Claudia in her question said that at the moment she's not feeling very attracted to the inquiry. She feels like taking God's name. So in taking God's name, how do we come to the door of the temple?

What is that door? It is beyond senses, thoughts, emotions, the sense of me, the sense of separation. It is beyond all of that. It is a stillness where we have transcended all of these faculties of mind, intellect, emotion, sensory perception. All of these faculties have been left behind.

Now what is the best news? The best news is that as we take his name, and it can be her name, his name, it is activated in our soul's wisdom to point us, to bring us actually to that holy place. So as we remember God's name in the form of Ram, Krishna, Devi, Radha, Jesus, Allah, when we sit in patience and faith, something naturally gravitates into the heart and all our faculties become one-pointed and they bring us to that holy place where his darshan can be received, in the form of the Atma itself, that is called Atma darshan.

Now why does it sound so easy when I am saying it, and maybe it sounds a bit more complicated or difficult when we try to do it? That is only because there is another force at work. This, we've talked about, is the holy calling from the Atma within, which is pulling the soul, the antahkarana, towards itself. But there's another force called Maya which is tempting us to not turn inwards. It is tempting us to turn outwards.

So when we try to turn inwards it will present ideas of something that we need to do in the world, something that is wrong, something that we need to fix, someone who has been unfair to us, or somebody that we are falling in love with, infatuated with, some opportunity to make money. All of these things will pull us away from that holy process of turning inwards.

So in the path of taking God's name, the solution is simple: when we find ourselves forgetting God, then we remember his name again. You see, what is a distraction? A distraction is nothing but a mind presentation which takes us away from the remembrance of God, the forgetting of God. You see, so when we forget then we return to the name.

So there is no difference between taking the name and waiting in patience and a constant remembrance of him. As we remain in constant remembrance then the work is happening. And we've actually done our part of it. We've done our end of it. Whatever we think we could do, we have done. To take on more in terms of 'why is nothing happening, when will I have the darshan, is this it,' to take on more is to allow the ego into our spiritual process. You see, so the process is of relationship building. When we present ourselves to the beloved in our heart, the rest is for the beloved to do.

Is more repetition better or not better? It's subjective. It could be better. It's like in a human relationship if you kept remembering the name of your beloved a million times, then that could be a great sign of love. You see, but if there is too much grasping involved in that, then it could become the danger of a one-sided relationship. So we have to remember that it is a constant offering of our heart. The constant offering of our heart over and over. And for that if it takes Ram Ram Ram Ram Ram Ram Ram Ram Ram Ram Ram then that is fine. You see, because Ram knows we are remembering him.

Neither more nor less is the clear answer. So we cannot really say more is better, maybe, because at least in more there is lesser danger of fooling ourselves. You see, in more there's lesser danger of fooling ourselves. But there is a slight danger in more also, which is that it could become something that is a one-sided relationship, that I have to do the entirety of it, I am taking control of the whole process. You see, it's not like that. So we have to be, and unfortunately this is where straight answers stop. You see, there's no capacity to be able to say that constant repetition fast is better, or slowly tasting every syllable falling into the heart is better.

So the simple guideline we can have is: if a lot of distraction then repeat. If you are able to stay in the holy still place, then it is not harmful or bad. It is only auspicious to repeat, but it is not necessarily bad to not repeat also.

Some more. I can see the impatience at home while coming in satsang, being here in your presence, then yes darshan happens. And so the prasad is there. There's an explosion in my heart or in my center.

Yes. Very good.

It can also be that in satsang we use a different set of eyes. You see, because the transformation that is happening in the inner instrument, most of that will not be palpable to our mind, to our senses, to any image making. It is, it may seem to the mind a pure stillness, a pure silence. You see, but in that pure silence there is a lot of sunshine. I don't know, maybe a better way to put it will come, but a lot of the dazzling darkness, as the Sufi said, is being received by us in our heart. And that mostly we will not be able to find evidence of using our empirical instruments, and to be able to say that it is working or it is not working. You see?

So that's why it's very important just to allow ourselves to remain over there and not bring the checker guy into it and say, 'Okay, I'm there. What is happening? Is something happening?' You see, then we can say, 'Okay, now with which instrument will I really be able to check?'

Also in satsang the table is somehow prepared. Everybody is here and we are all just waiting for God and then it's opening up.

You see, because the turning inwards and turning in love towards him is also contagious. Just like Maya is contagious. In the same way when we sit together with the intention to be in his light and his presence, that is also contagious.

Yes. The holy space is palpable.

Yeah. Exactly. Isn't it beautiful that he has made it so simple for us to meet the lord of the universe? We just have to remember his name. You see, or seek the truth with the capital T. Seek the truth in the form of 'who am I?' Brings us to the same place.

The more difficult part is the keeping our ego out in the form of the checking. You see, in the form of the checking: 'I'm doing this, what's happening to me. I'm doing this, what's happening to me.' So that has to be kept out because we don't have the capacity to check on what's happening. We don't have the capacity. And if the heart wants to tell us something, then it will tell us something in our heart. We don't have to go to our mind or memory to find the report about what's happening over there.

You see? So it is both good news and bad news that you have no idea about your progress. Good news in terms of the great relief. And bad news seems like there are many possibilities for frustration in the process, because I can't really make out: am I deepening in my prayer? I don't know.

So every time we pray we become humbler and humbler, because we see his magnificence. But also we see our inability to take another step. Our ego is crushed in that. No, because we end up feeling like we can do everything. But now when we face that space, we find that we have no lever left. We have no step left that we can take and no other instrument that we can turn. You see? And nothing makes a difference. How much money we have, how beautiful we are, how diligent we are in our life, how much people love us, none of these things matter. All that the ego cares about doesn't matter here. How much power we have, how big a pedestal we sit on, how many people care about us, none of that matters.

You see, so it leaves us very humble and that's a beautiful gift from God as well. That's why the sages as they keep growing, they become humbler and humbler. We become humbler because we meet our inability in the process of prayer, and we meet his holy grace where we have to rely just purely on faith, as a beggar with hands open, waiting and longing to receive him.

That's why humility is the king of virtues. It is on humility that every other virtue hinges. Otherwise no virtue is possible.

So our ego is: 'I am somebody, it means I am somebody special, I am important.' Now at that point where we are left out of moves, then all our worldly importance means nothing. And if this becomes the project of your life, and the most important project of your life, all your worldly specialness means nothing. Then in reality in your life, all your worldly specialness is actually nothing, isn't it?

If you learned how to use a parachute and jump out of airplanes and you were the world's best expert on it, but you realize one day that the main project of your life is scuba diving, then all that practice is nothing. In the same way, when we see that all of this is pointless, all of this leads us nowhere, the worldly acquisitions and the worldly attachments really lead us nowhere. Once we see that, and the only wealth we want to build is spiritual wealth, then we really recognize our inability to add anything to that by ourselves. Only through his grace can we grow in that way.

So that process has bound to make us humble and simple, because what has been described is not complicated. It's the simplest thing. That's why Ramakrishna said: God is the only one you can attain just by turning towards him. You don't have to speak a word. You don't have to take any action. You don't have to do anything. Just turn towards him.

I feel this inability is very auspicious, Father, because all this while there was always a belief, or in subtle ways, that I can do something. But really, Father, it's coming down to this point, you know, to recognize that it's not, you know, like you're totally at his mercy. Very humbling and a great relief at the same time.

Isn't it? Because if you do it sincerely then it humbles us like I've described. But it's also a great relief because the mind bullies us and says: 'You are not looking hard enough. You are not looking correctly. You are not doing it correctly.' And we feel like: now I am in the silence, what else can I do over there without reverting back to the lack of silence? You see, so when the mind punishes us, oppresses us in these ways, that it's your fault you're not free, it's your fault you're not enlightened, it's your fault you haven't come to Atma darshan. Then we say: no, all I can do is what I'm doing, because it's a process of grace. It's a process of faith. We cannot force it. No matter what we use, we cannot force it. The only possible bribe for God is love. Just, we simply lovingly, I feel, we make ourselves irresistible to him only in that way. Nothing else works. Nothing else.

I also have been noticing how this thing of the ability that I have, you know, there's a subtle thing, like the mind tries to protect or save this. I don't know, like I'm noticing that this is about you know, like...

So that idea in our ability to do that which is happening outside this universe is a very subtle but a very extreme form of pride, isn't it. And again I keep talking about modern spirituality: it's been aggravated in modern spirituality which tells us that we have to do it, we can do it. You see, how we don't even know what is inside. When we say we have to turn within, we don't even know where that is. You see, so to be able to say that we will go there and may God reveal himself to us, it's a pure prideful fallacy.

Well, sometimes I also, I think Swami Ram Das says that sometimes it's the 'upnap' that is the trickiest part, you know, that the pull that we feel, like because sometimes we may not see that if we may attack the mind but it also subtly lies in the part where we feel, you know, like this part, you know, just somewhere also tries to, we are not able to see that part.

And the more we belong to him the more we will feel he belongs to us. The more we say, the more we will see that. So if we keep offering our heart to him, then we will start to feel like all the sages used to make these very drastic statements, that 'he is mine, if I call him he has to come.' But that is after a great, great emptying, a great surrender to him. You see, that our tongue can speak those mighty words.

It's very good. So if we're feeling that we're taking God's name but we are not getting anywhere, repeat. That's all. If we start feeling that I am getting somewhere, repeat. Just repeat. Either God's name or stillness. If you're forgetting, remember: distraction is forgetting. This is what happens. Oh, I forgot to reply to that message. And what must that one be thinking? They wished me happy birthday. You see, so we've forgotten Ram in that. So when we notice, 'I've forgotten Ram,' repeat Ram. Oh, so do we have the recording tomorrow or day after? Do we have to go? Did we get the list properly? All of that. Then we've forgotten Ram. So repeat, just like that. We notice the forgetting. We don't beat ourselves up about it. We don't say 'you're doing badly, that's more and more forgetting.' We just repeat.

Could be the attention is providing us some imagery, visuals, and we seem to have forgotten God and just enjoying that movie which is playing out in our head. We notice that, we repeat. The simplicity of this is what the mind hates. The ego hates: so simple to find God. It's extremely simple and yet it'll make us the most patient, most faithful, most humble in the process, because we're transcending the mind. We're getting beyond the mind.

So all that was shared in satsang, 'don't believe your next thought,' 'don't identify,' all of these things are included in this naturally. So if you keep with the pointer 'don't believe your next thought' and don't get into any thoughts about believing or disbelieving the next thought, you come to the same place, same empty, same stillness. That open and empty is the same stillness which has been spoken about.

If you say who is Kabir Ji? So even if you know very little about the sage Kabir Ji, whatever you know is brought up by your soul, by your faculties, to be presented to you. You say, who is Mirabai? See who is, centuries of Advaita. It comes. Now what happens when you ask 'who am I?' You see, a presentation comes which is about the person, the body, about the attributes of this one. Then we ask: who witnesses that? Not as a learned knowledge. So even if the answer comes 'pure awareness witnesses that,' you see, we have to ask who witnesses that answer. We don't settle for a concept. We settle for the darshan. Remember this in inquiry: if you're settling for a concept, it is not inquiry. You don't settle for a concept. You settle for the darshan. You settle for realization, recognition. Nothing less than that will do.

It's the same thing. In remembrance of God, we don't settle for anything other than God in the form of the Atma. We don't settle for worldly peace, although we accept it as a gift. We don't settle for feeling blissful, although we accept it with gratitude as a gift. But we don't treat any of this as progress. At best we can treat it as: we are on the right path, you see, but we don't make the milestones. We settle for nothing but God.

We cannot fail at this. We cannot fail at this because our very design is this.

So feeling is only to give importance to Maya. That is a short term, for the moment: Maya or God. Maya or God.

Father. Did you say we cannot fail at this?

We cannot fail at this. You see, we cannot fail at this because our very design is this. We are designed to love God. You see, our whole inner instrument as I'm calling it today is designed to love God.

The only thing that you would call failing at this is to not do it at all, to not try, to not take one step. The only one step is needed, to not take that step, to not turn inward. Then we can't really call that a failing. We can just say that we didn't want it really, or we didn't take it to be true that God is here.

If you take it to be true that God is here, can you spend your life really devoted to Maya? You can't. You see, because you can, but in that you would have to either forget what God means, what isness means, what hereness means. Something has to be forgotten. If you remember who God is and if you remember what isness is and you remember what hereness is, in the sense that God exists as a reality which can be met, you see, if we don't forget the promise in this, the beauty, the vastness in this, then we cannot fail at this.

When I pick my will, I must forget who God is. It's impossible otherwise. God becomes a conceptual notion. Where, why will I pick? Oh, to go left or right. I can only do it if I forget that God is here. He can pick it, isn't it? Why should I go with my will unless I have forgotten who is actually here?

There is one question there which is quite interesting. Why did God make the experience of being in the present or stillness still a task?

Beautiful question. So if that is about love, you see, and the love did not involve a turning, then can we really call that a love? I take this example, maybe it's helpful. If you're a parent, if my son called me and said 'oh I just called because my day is empty, I have nothing to do,' she said then okay, something. But if my son called me and said 'there's so much happening all around me, there's this to do, I have this party with my friends, I have this going on, I have an exam tomorrow, but I still wanted to call you and say I love you.' You see somewhere that sounds like love, that seems like love.

You see? So if our life was given to us in a way that we were always programmed, never to be able to turn away or to turn within, then can we really say that this is a loving relationship? You see, so because this love is not forced or pre-programmed, it is a beautiful path to turn inwards. Now will we see one day that even this was his grace? We might. But till we don't see that, we should not get involved in any conceptual idea of everything being in God's will, unless we are able to apply it everywhere in our lives.

You see, so if it is clearly apparent to you that you did not ask this question, if it is clearly apparent to you that you did not come to Zoom, it is clearly apparent to you that you don't have to worry about feeding yourselves and your family, if you've left everything truly to God's will, surrendered, then that is fine. But if it still seemed like 'I can do something,' then why can I not do the turning inwards?

Father, if one needs to go left or right, take it to God and ask him what to do. Yes. Why not?

Now God is sitting here in the form of Lord Ram. Whichever God appeals to you in your heart, then he's sitting here. Now will we say: 'Oh, now I don't have time to ask him.' It is what I'm trying to say is that it seems distant because maybe it is a lack of faith that he is actually here.

You see, now okay, he's actually here but he takes too long to respond. Must that be for our better or for our worse? You see, are you calling God slow?

No, you know, like I can take it to him but you know there's a whole bureaucratic process that happens. First it's gone to the minor devatas, then they will take the petition upwards, then it'll go to so-and-so, then so-and-so will give it when Lord Ram has time. Whatever you say. Why does it take time?

Because God is slow? No, because he's teaching us what is needed in that moment. If we say Ram, you feel like he can't change the whole universe in one instant. So if he needs patience and humility in that moment then he teaches us that. If he realizes, if he sees that none of that is needed, but the whole, every atom in this tiny play for him which is this universe has to change in response to our heart's calling, it's nothing for him.

It's more about my doubting my ability to hear anymore, not yet there.

He will answer. Yes. So that's why I keep pressing on this point: that if we were to feel that he's sitting with us holding our hand, you see, and the fact is what is the heart telling us? Our heart is telling us that the relationship and his presence is much more intimate than that. Not a worldly relationship, not based on atoms and molecules, more intimate than everything. And as we deepen in our love, in our faith, then this will become more and more natural to us to take it to God rather than to rely on my mind, to rely on my intellect.

There is no time between your remembrance of him and him hearing your petition. So if one childish idea comes and says: 'Lord, reveal yourself as the lord of the universe to me,' it is there is no doubt that he has received the prayer. Now the revelation may happen or a waiting may happen, but he knows best. He's not a genie. You see, we are not going to him as if he is the servant. We are going in our servitude, begging of him.

So then imagine if God fulfilled every request we had, every prayer that we had, instantly, what would you become? You would become Ravan in half an hour.

It's live. Namaste. This is my first live satsang. I just wanted to share something that's been my experience these days. Whenever I remember God, there's a strong warm tingling sensation that arises within my heart. And this, there's a very silent intuitive voice that says, 'Leave all your concepts of me behind. Leave everything behind. Leave your name behind. Leave your knowledge behind.' But the voice is very subtle. But there is a way of the world that I've known until now up to this age of my life. And that Maya, that identification with my name, with everything that I have suffered through, or the memories are so strong. So it kind of feels very disorienting because this voice is very subtle but there is a very strong pull. But there's also a very strong resistance that arises from the mind. And somehow the more love I've started to feel within my heart I've also started to feel more frustrating, like it started to feel more frustrating. And sometimes it feels like I'm in heaven and sometimes it feels like when I'm identified I'm in hell. So how do I navigate through this period, like where it's like I just don't know, like the pull is so strong but why why the Maya then? Why, why did even God, why do I need to transcend my mind as well? These questions arise, like why is it not so simple, yet it is so simple.

Very beautiful. Thank you for this report and I'm very happy that you're falling into your heart more and more and you're starting to hear your inner voice. So I'm very happy with this report. Now along with the mind's temptations and pulls, it is also providing you resistance in the form of 'why can't this be easier?' You see, now what the process to turn yourselves inwards towards God is: easy, is simple. But to transcend this voice is difficult, you see. So we have to accept that the granularity of it is very simple, but as a lived life, the life of those who are attempting to live in God's love, light and presence may seem like the most difficult life.

So you must accept that first: that it is not going to be easy because you are in spirituality. In fact, your struggles you may find very difficult to find others to understand. So at work otherwise, people can understand: 'Oh my boss is like this,' everybody can understand, or 'my partner is like this,' everybody can understand. But this struggle in our life, this Mahabharat between God Krishna and the attachments of the kovas, we have to live it. But it is not going to necessarily seem like an easy life, you see. So just accept firstly it's going to be difficult.

It is not going to be easy. The Buddha said that a man may, and sorry about the sexist language, but the man may transcend a thousand armies but it is more difficult to transcend their own mind. You see, may defeat a thousand armies but it's more difficult to transcend their own mind. So realize that this transcending Maya is where in our history, if you read, you will see that the greatest sages have fallen for Maya over and over again. Fallen for temptation, fallen for lust, fallen for anger, fallen for greed, fallen for all of these things. And those are great great sages like Narad Ji himself. You see, Vishwamitra, Narad Ji, all these sages have been known to have fallen for Maya.

So then we are also going to keep falling. But Srian Buddha Gi said very simply that, if you follow, we just get up. What does that mean? We don't do checker guy postmortems. We don't do diagnosis. We don't do blood test report of our spiritology. You see, we've fallen down. We return to God's life. We've fallen down, we went with Maya. We return to God's life. So as much as possible we just love him. We just live in his love and faith so much there's no time to worry about the progress of this one and the difficulty or the ease of the process. We are not worried about that at all because even that is taking time away from us being with the beloved.

So he's there, what he wants to show me, he'll show me. I just have to be with him and love him. I went with the mind. I fell for irritation and anger. Okay. Now what is the best I can do? I can return to him in my heart.

Thank you, thank you, Father. He also tells me in my heart that, like, somehow intuitively it feels like he tells me to choose him, to keep choosing him all the time. Like that's why the answer is already there within the heart. Why? But it's just mind's constant chattering to ask why does he not love me, to be creating this Maya. So all these questions come but the answers are also there at the same time. It's just like the voice is so subtle, it's hard to believe but at the same time believe. I hope you understand.

So. Maya is Maya. Someone told us this great pointer that Maya only means that 'me' has come. Now, if you, and Krishna is the best way to remember this pointer: do you feel like Krishna will accept your half love, half for the 'me' and half for him?

He's not going to. He's going to say: 'I want you fully to myself.' Yes, there is no hiding from that. You see, so that process of detaching from the world, detaching from the 'me,' and falling more and more in love with his presence, his reality in our heart, is this whole spiritual journey. And remember that it's a lifetime project. Your mind will bully you and say 'no, finish.' But imagine that if it actually finished, that would be terrible. No more deepening, no more growth, no more falling in love. No, it is a constant deepening. Constant growth.

Thank you so much. Thank you.

So welcome. So welcome. So try your best not to have any, or not any, maybe too much to ask for. Just don't have too much self-diagnostics. Because in that same time where we are wondering about where we are, whether we've fallen fully out of Maya, whether Maya still does this to us, all of that, we could have loved God so much more in that much time.

So then even the checking on what is happening with me in my spiritual path is not, so we just go crazier and crazier in love, like all the sages. So just not a moment away from the beloved, even if it is even if the topic is spirituality. We know in our heart what is about me which is maya is maya and what is really about God we know.

Yes. Very good. Bless you. You're welcome. And don't feel shy or afraid to ask any question at all ever. Sure. Sure. Thank you. Bless you.

It's exclusive. If you just remember Anandamayi Ma's words: Maya is Maya. There is no Maya without 'me.' And there is no escaping Maya with 'me.' Cannot wiggle our way out of it. You see, cannot fool our way out of it by making the 'me' about God. You see, Ravan dressed as a sage is still Ravan only. So Maya is God dressed in worldly trickster form. Now if you dress that up in God form it still remains Maya's own. So ultimately of course all is God alone. But while it seems like we're in the midst of this fight then we must not become weak in the fight against the selfishness of the 'me.'

So at best I can see that there is, at best, let him operate. But when you say that he guides you, then there will be somebody, call it Maya, to talk to him on the other side. So when you say he will guide you, he'll guide me for left and right, the best experience I could have is to know him and just move around.

Yeah. So but when you say to ask him or talk to him, then invariably 'me' comes in further.

Thank you, good question. So when the sage is saying that, is he lying? Because he must be presenting the 'me' in that case. No, who is he talking about? It seems like a conundrum but remember that our soul can be empty of the 'me' and can be filled with God, or can be empty of God, take God to be conceptual, and filled with the 'me.' So where is the guidance received? In our antahkarana itself. In our antahkarana, in our soul, it is being guided by God's light, or it can get attracted to the 'me.'

So the spiritual process is about what we are filling our soul up with, what we are filling our insides up with. So till we don't fill it up with the 'me,' which is notions about the 'me,' it cannot be, it's not about the 'me.' Does the antahkarana still need God's guidance in it? It does. So there comes a point now where there is a divine union, where there is no separation in the antahkarana left at all. It has fully emerged into the divine. The sages have called it a divine marriage. You see, till that divine union has happened, we can say that's why this ainta, that unfathomable oneness and yet distinction, and that distinction, the only refuge for that distinction is in servitude to God and willing to follow God's will, to follow his love.

Sorry, I feel I'm being very mumbly, Father.

Okay. So there won't be any receiver that there could be a situation. There is no receiver and still there's a lane. There is God and there is 'me.' You see, now when the lane is left empty for God then the lane receives God. You see, but it's still not the 'me.' What is the lane?

Will God ever instruct me toward Maya? God can do anything. God can do anything. But you'll find it more and more difficult. You see, you find it more and more difficult to feel from your heart, doing it from your heart, if you're involved with the 'me.' You see, but it has happened and there are many stories of this in the world where someone was about to make a catastrophic mistake, something catastrophic, and God spoke very strongly to them from the heart. It can happen. He can do everything.

The lane is narrow and usually there is no God if there is 'me,' and there is no 'me' if there's God. But that is not a lack of God's capacity to empty the lane himself if he has to. He's not given us that much freedom also. But as a general guideline, if you're filled with 'me,' we cannot meet God. And when we are in God's presence, we cannot fill ourselves up with 'me.'

Returning to the question of why is turning to God still a task. And just turning to him is all that is needed. You see, and we're willing to do many tasks in the world. You see, we're willing to do many tasks in the world, so-called worldly responsibilities, for making money, for getting good relationships. We're willing to do a lot of tasks. You see, if you want a special degree, we are willing to study for many years. If you want that special partner, we are willing to go out of our way and court them, you see, for a long long period of time. But the wanting God, the loving God, the mind says: 'Oh but then I shouldn't have to move a finger in that.'

Now God is very humble, you see, but if he devalued himself in this complete way then it would be very detrimental to our own pride. If he met us without us needing to be humble, we would become monsters very fast. Now those we were talking about the other day, those who have really lost faith in God and feel like they have all the power, they become monsters anyway. But imagine that if they had God dancing to their tunes, not even turning is needed, he's just there, you see, then they would become very very horrible.

So he makes sure that we become humble and we remember that it is only his grace which grants us his darshan. You see, already there are so many claimants to God in this world who are causing so much havoc in the name of spirituality. You see, so imagine what would happen if God just gave himself to us in that way without any humility.

You can turn it off. Is everyone feeling cool? Yes. Freezing. Turn it off.

I think sometimes what was being said was: sometimes I feel God reminds me really clearly how much he has loved me and how he's been. Because when you're under that pull of the mind, you forget that.

Am I visible now? Audible. We had a power cut here and we're using the phone hotspot and the internet may not be so good. Seems to be back now.

So God has given us both ends of the spectrum. Through our intuitive insight, through the Atma's eyes, through the eyes of the heart, we can see the reality of him.

Like, 'but I am That,' why must I not gossip? You see, if it is happening, that is doing it. I've heard these kind of things, no, we've all heard them. So if lack of kindness, lack of compassion is happening, if gossip is happening, which I'm pointing out gossip because many times the mind presents it as a harmless thing, so if these things are happening then that itself is doing it. Who am I to get in the way? You see, it's not like that. We must deepen in our recognition as that and we must keep growing in our virtues. We must keep going in our kindness, love, compassion, absence of gossip, a fruitless unworthy waste of time, using words, putting down our brothers, sisters. All this kind of we have to work on. So center is little way of the small small things, small ways of loving God. And Bhagavan Maharishi's big leap is transcending the universe and meeting the reality of what I am. One will help the other, virtuous circle. But we must not make the mind the arbiter.

Okay. Finally. Okay. Seems to be all right for the moment. Let's see how it goes. A flash of enlightenment there. Let's see if it comes back soon.

These days I feel like some puzzle is cracked, like the one who thinks, the one who feels, all of it is appearing within me. I don't know what else. I don't know. Is there any danger? I think it is my thoughts, my feelings.

If it is, if you are the soul, then you can fill yourself up with God. Because there is no danger in that. But it seemed like you're specifically asking me permission or sort of approval to identify in a certain way.

The question is: but then why not 'I am God' or 'I have God's presence here'? Because as a soul, what is in your innermost chamber, why focus on only mansion one when mansion seven is also there? Remember, Teresa of Avila spoke about it: in mansion one there will be many times reptiles which come in from the gate. So you can't just say because mansion one is part of the interior castle, can I just stay there?

So what makes it so that even upon hearing the best news that God is here, we gravitate towards: 'can I just be me?' Because the tangibility of God's presence doesn't yet seem like a reality. It doesn't seem, he doesn't seem real yet to us. Either we make God into not-God or we make his reality into an unreality.

Either we make God into a not-God. You see, 'oh yes, the presence is here, I stay in the presence, but really is that helping me?' You see, so it becomes more like, I don't know what words I've been using, it's like a force field. You see, like the tractor beam is here. So am I being pulled in though? You see, more like that rather than the fact that he is God.

Or our mind messes with our faith and says 'no, he's not,' like he keeps saying 'God is actually here' but in my case he's not here. Actually, really, really, is he? So this is where we are stuck, in the human condition, because the Atma is constantly pleading with us, showing us he is here, and the mind is constantly saying: 'It's all rubbish. Fend for yourself. Take care of the me. There is no such God.' You see, so unfortunately we cannot make a happy marriage between these two forces.

I think: 'Now half my life I will listen to Atma voice, half my life I'll listen to the mind.' It won't work like that. Our intention has to be 100% Atma. And then in that intention of 100% Atma, by his grace we may be able to spend half our time in God's presence, not caught in Maya.

So really okay let me make it simpler. Is God really really really here right now? You see, this is our time not to be meek about that. So if he's really really really here right now, we can start by informing our faces. Start by informing our faces. Yeah. Because our faces are not conveying that even in the darkness, presence is there.

Is that till that level I can... whose presence... God's presence. God's presence no. Huh.

If I told you that Ram Ji is sitting on a throne ten trillion miles away but one reflection from a diamond on his finger ring is coming and reaching you, if you had full faith in that fact that one ray from the diamond on his finger ring is coming and reaching you, you would celebrate that, isn't it?

Yes.

And now we are saying that I feel his own very presence himself is here. But why does that not sound like the best news ever in the universe? Can there be anything to worry if his presence is here? Can there be any scope for me to have to do anything at all that the 'me' is engaged with, any scope, if his real presence is here? It's not secondhand presence. It's not a mere reflection of his ring which itself would be glorious. He himself, when we say his presence, means he himself. He cannot be separated from his presence. His very essence is his presence. So he is here. Father, to answer your question.

Answer your question. The one who is not happy about it has to come to answer your question. One who is not happy about it, happy about presence of God which is Maya, has to come and give you the answer, Father. That's where. No, I'm not asking that one, I'm asking you: when Maya goes, do you go? When you are empty, do you go?

I don't go but the one who answers comes.

So that one who doesn't. Oh, how does that one know it is still here? Because empty of identity also our faculties continue to function. Our life continues to function without the labels, without the interpretation. You see now can we answer from that emptiness? Yes. That is how we are sharing satsang. That is where we are sharing satsang from and receiving satsang in. You see? So we have to trust that intuitively you know that you did not go away even if the mi went away isn't it? So from our intuition we can answer. That's why I love Bhagavan's quotation which I posted in the contemplation group today saying that we rely so much on our conceptual mind and our intellect but we've stopped relying on our intuition which and that which he called the dark cavern ta cavern or tavern I'm sorry I'm losing language at the moment of the mind is actually what we are referring to as the door of the heart temple you their intuitive insights are revealed to us and we can respond using our intuition.

You see, so when you say God's presence is here, do you need the me to say that?

To know I don't need me to say I still need me.

So are you saying that your mouth only responds to the 'me'?

If I don't come to 'me,' I don't want to talk also, Father.

How do you know that?

It's because nothing is coming. If I sustain that nothing, things will start coming, like the confirmation that God's presence is here is only known in the true place. Now you are saying that I have to bring the 'me' back for the mouth to report that, and if that was a rule then no sharing of satsang would ever be possible.

So that's not a rule for you, Father. It's for me, that's...

Okay. So what you do is you remain empty of that 'me' and then just like from here the words will start coming from the heart. So don't rush into saying anything till then.

I'll wait, Father.

Yes. Very good. Very good. Maybe it's also that it's a presumption that you pick up the 'me' to answer and God's presence is here. Tell me the full mechanics of how you said that with your mouth. You know what you have to do to pick up the 'me,' isn't it? You have to give attention to a thought. You have to identify that thought to be true for you. And that 'true for me' is the 'me' is picked up. So attention and belief is given. Now if the fact of God's presence is revealing itself in your heart, do you have to go through that thought process to pick up the 'me' and then to speak?

Yes, it's a little bit getting blur now.

Okay, take your time on this. It's a very worthy contemplation, because otherwise the mind will have you trapped: 'know that to speak anything you have to go to me only, only the me can speak, then you can never be a voice for God.' So don't fall into that trap. Heart to mouth is what our life will become, our words will become.

Father, I don't know how to say this, but I want to say and I want to hear from you. I have no idea how to say this. That place where I'm meeting something is very subtle. I have not met it like this before, Father. I have met it in a very radiant way and very like light and sensation and good feeling, divinity, holiness. I've felt all of that. But now Father it's an extremely subtle place which is...

Sorry, it's very hard to say.

It's impossible.

It's impossible, because what is after the isness is very difficult to speak anything more.

So sometimes we use words like 'that silent still space that holds our way to God,' but none of that really applies. But it's deeply...

Yes, because it's beyond all our faculties.

It's quenching like without flavor, without experience, without anything.

Yes. That's the taste of ma'rifa.

It's deeply quenching. Father, my heart longs to be here. I love being here, Father. I love, I don't know, it's like all that, so hard to say what it's like. One just falls into that, and then I'm coming out and then I'm just grasping for it. And then if I'm chanting, I can't do anything to go there also. I feel, I mean, I don't know if I'm saying the right thing, Father.

We can't. That's why when we talked about the process of how taking God's name works, we don't know how to transcend our faculties and become one-pointed and fall into the heart. But our soul knows in its wisdom and its design. That's the best reassurance, isn't it.

Can I say something? Like today you said and earlier you said that we don't really know what is how to go within or what is within something like that you said. And Father, like, because I've been chanting chanting so much I could the chant would not stop you know like it just kept going on and on and on. And now I didn't realize when but then like it just became so empty and quiet. Yeah. And I felt like I couldn't stop this giant even if I wanted to. And yeah, it's quite beautiful, Father.

It's very good. And it points me to my foolishness that for years I just used to keep saying 'open and empty,' presuming that we'll all just fall into that open and empty.

Father that place, I want to ask: is this the place where you say that we meet it, like is this the Saguna place? No, still I'm asking because it feels very like away from this world, it's not at all like anything you know.

Yes, it's beyond all our usual modes of knowledge, faculties. Here is where we can come to the darshan, Atma darshan, which is the finger of God which he is sending us, to help us, to guide us, to comfort us, to teach us, to love us. So that finger, when we hold on to it, we get access to his eyes. And through his eyes we see the Saguna nature of his boundless reality as consciousness, and we see the source of this very consciousness, the Nirguna nature of Nirguna Brahman.

You know why I'm asking you this? Because this in itself feels very devoid of everything: the world and the mind and the perceptions and feelings, good feelings, everything.

Absolutely.

It's not like a, so that's why I'm asking.

Yes, yes. And that is why I keep pointing to the danger of taking this settling of attention, which can seem like a dark empty place, you see, and then to take that to be awareness itself can be the danger. Then he can take this homing-in of attention as if there is no light there, because attention has gone to its very origin. Then it can seem like our attention brings us to this awareness itself. But this is not awareness. Awareness is aware even of this.

Yeah, I hear you actually because I feel like I am beginning now like into what you've said. I don't feel like I've ever begun. It's feeling like every day here also, every day I feel like whatever I've been doing since 23 years old, my journey. No father, you know, just my journey.

No, no. You're too humble, Father. That's the problem. That's true like that. And it's good news like that also because if it started to feel stale and if I felt like I know it all already then what is the fun in it? What is the joy in it?

Father I want to ask one more point is very critical for all of us. Like attention withdraws when we become one-pointed. M.

You see now when attention withdraws we are still perceiving a dark empty place you see and that is fine as long as we remember that that is the doorway at which the dashion will happen but to confuse that to be awareness itself then the mind will use that dark emptiness as the as a picture of awareness but it is not awareness awareness is not dark or light.

And Father, I just want confirmation from everyone that you're hearing this: that when our attention withdraws to its very origin, it seemed like I am in an empty space. But in the withdrawal of attention it seemed like a dark empty space which seemed like it's boundless. So a lot of that which we use to confirm awareness can be applied here. You see. But remember that we are still perceiving the darkness. So it's still a perception. It is only through the eyes of the Atma that we recognize that which is beyond dark or light, beyond being and not being.

Withdrawal is when I'm saying, you know, like what we call the becoming one-pointed. Withdrawal, what's a better word? Maybe the one-pointed attention, we can call it that. So when you allow your attention free, if you leave it fully free also it'll withdraw in the same way. If you leave it with God's name also it'll withdraw in the same way. If you use the inquiry also it'll withdraw in the same way. So beyond thought and perception, that's what you're like, beyond. So when I say 'open and empty,' we leave our attention fully free. You see, and then what happens: if we allow ourselves to remain empty it falls into the same place. We may call it the heart. Yes, we may call it the heart. We may call it the doorway of the heart temple. We may call it various things, or it doesn't exist at all.

Do you still perceive like dark?

No.

Do you not perceive anything at all?

There is no weightage to perception. We don't value perception through belief and thought. So that's different. But I'm saying: is there perception still happening? In the waking state, unless you are in samadhi, there is always perception happening.

Yes. Perception happening. But yes, we are not labeling. We are not buying into any of that. You see, so attention can be left free. Now as it is left free for prolonged periods of time, it withdraws in the same way that I'm talking about, falls into the heart in the same way. All our faculties fall, you see, our mind, our intellect, our emotion, everything. We cannot separate between the two, between all of these layers, and we just become one-pointed in the heart.

Father, this is to be pulled in.

It gets pulled in, in the wisdom of our soul. Like, we can use God's name, we can use the inquiry, we can use the tools which the sages have offered to us. But we don't actually know how to pull in. You see, now this is level one pulling in, where we become one-pointed. Then God pulls us in after that. That is when the savikalpa samadhi, nirvikalpa samadhi, union, all those things happen. Yeah, you see, so first darshan will happen, then in the light of the darshan we may, we can't say there's a linear sequence.

Father, at present the outcome of prayer is open and empty, which means scattered attention. Or the outcome of prayer is centered attention, which you said, either, like, if we feel that we can just remain empty and our attention is free to move wherever it wants, it will naturally center itself. So the previous stage itself, some will find that in taking God's name, attention is falling in directly without getting scattered there, and that is fine as well. My question was: is there subtle effort required to reach open and empty? And are you inspiring me to put more effort to go to vairagya?

That's it. That's that. Open and empty is sufficient. Open and empty without japa also is sufficient. Or japa itself without open and empty is also sufficient.

Sometimes just organically, if you keep noticing, you see, a lot of these things happen. Like if you hear a bhajan, many times we just fall in somewhere and we don't want to be disturbed by anything in the world. And if you notice that your attention has become centered in the heart, don't worry. As long as, like, to be open and empty is beautiful. It's very very beautiful.

So it's either open and empty or centered and empty? Like, in the way you are calling it, attention is just free everywhere, all-encompassing, broad, but we are empty of any conceptual belief, empty of any 'me.' Or we find that attention seems to be one-pointed, so I've become very minute and I can't really bring it to anything else. I don't find any mind, I don't find any intellect, I don't find any anything. Everything is naturally resting in that quiet stillness.

So that is the ikagita the onepointedness. Open and empty is sufficient. Open and empty without japa also is sufficient. Or japa itself without open and empty is also sufficient. And when we learn to live here more and more many times we get answers in faith and then we start the contemplation of those answers.

Father my question was: attention is scattered, the prayer is going on, so and then attention will be centered somehow, that's it.

Yeah, like the antakarna pulls in all its faculties and you will not be able to distinguish between mind intellect emotion any perception. It'll all become centered and one-pointed.

But my limitations is only up to open and empty, that's it, or even further.

As you open and empty and if you continue in remembrance of God's name, then that's all you have to do. Okay.

That's how it feels like, it feels like that song, 'omarupa,' like over here, without meeting I can meet, like that. You know what I'm saying?

Yes. Because this meeting is going to be the more valued one. So far what we've called is meeting perceptually as the meeting. Now we are able to meet in faith.

And to the mind it can sound like complete hocus pocus. But Father I want to ask: do sages answer from faith or do sages answer from direct darshan?

Faith becomes the direct darshan.

I see. Can you say more on that?

Like, faith is not one-dimensional like it may seem at the moment. You know, so the mind says: 'What is faith? Just making up any spiritual-sounding stuff.' That is the mind's version of faith. Now in faith you know more than you have ever known in the mind. And without needing perceptual evidence for that. That's true. Now it doesn't mean that nothing is ever shown to us there. But it is shown, that's what the eyes of the Atma mean, when I say it is shown to us in a different set of eyes. And that, there is color, there is texture, there is beauty, but not in the way that we used to in perception.

Exactly, Father, and I can, like it's amazing how one can say that. It's mad, Father, how one can say that.

Yes. So those who live in faith are mad to the mind, and those who live in the mind are mad to the ones with faith.

It's mad in the most beautiful way. Father, again I'm going mad I think.

Just to come to this point. No, like. This is the madness that we are encouraging in sats. It's mad, father. It's fully mad. I feel it's so good. It's too good, father. It's the most sanity. It's too good. It's just next level stuff. It's diff like who who will understand this? We have to start with ourselves also. Can we only understand it first? I mean like so literal. And so God knows it's crazy father. It's very good. It's right. But it appeals to everyone like a abhang like omarupa you see. So why does it appeal? Because somewhere even though we may be so much in the mind, something is always connected to the heart somewhere, even if it feels very distant. That's why these devotional songs, they sing such big things and to the mind they can sound like very big things, and yet something resonates somewhere with us. That part knows, where it's that, that our Atma, our deepest core, is self-luminous. Yes.

Right. This makes me insane, Father. To meet that in faith, right? Like to meet that in faith, it's so sweet. I've just been going on and on saying this to, to whoever listen, to whoever listens, Father. Really?

But father, it's the sweetest thing. And I have no idea how.

The sweetest new thing.

Sweetest no thing.

Now I'm just messing around.

It is. It is. It's mindblowing, father. And my mind is like, what are you finding? What's going on?

Yeah, I know that your mind, all of your minds will always say you're faking it. Yeah, it's constantly telling you because it's out of its access zone. Yeah, it will always say no. But is this really true what you're saying? You're faking it. So don't get into that trap. Just keep deepening in that more and more. Deepening in that.

So father like I want to say that so I'm I'm chanting chanting chanting and then I come to this place where I my heart just wants to speak about this selfgen. So like, I just love it so much father I can't explain how much and ready to lose all your audience.

I told them.

It's so like, what is she going on about? It's so beautiful, father. I don't know what I'm finding, what is happening, but my heart just wants to like and I feel like I I find the feet of my sguru there. And all the footprints. I don't know if I found I don't think I found his feet but I found his footprints.

Don't worry about framing it yet because if you try to articulate it too much then it will become learned knowledge and you stop going there, you will start referring to learned knowledge, or the frames that the mind is providing for it. So leave it as fresh as possible.

Yes father and father you fresh translated and in awe of that. Yes.

So father like there are few like words and terms that help me. Mine is like you are seeing this. Okay. But every time mind comes like you're not seeing that, and concept, and you know that there's nothing wrong with this. Yeah. But problem though I leave it because I know it's an opposition from the mind.

Exactly. And then I will just keep on chanting chanting chanting and then it will give up.

Exactly. The mind gives up. Again and again it will come with the same point that okay that dark place you haven't come yet. You haven't transcended that dark place. But it's again that it's when you are here then why do you bother about any state. Exactly you see and the mind will never transcend that place anyway. You see the mind will never transcend that place anyway. So it will never be able to give you a report that you have transcended, because how would it know, isn't it? So we just have to rely on our heart only. We cannot rely on the mind. That's why I've been talking about this report, self-reporting, self-diagnostic.

So what we're calling self-luminousness is what I've been trying to convey as saying both perceivable and unperceivable. You see, because the word 'effulgent' itself can mean something to the imagination and mind. It can seem like light. It is not that kind of light. With which eyes? With those eyes. That is the one. With those eyes that I don't understand at all but they are like the most sweetest. Those eyes are so sweet, Father.

Yes. God is right. So the praash, the effulgence. It's not the kind of praash like if there was a solar bulb or something, you see. That praash is the light of the Satguru itself, the guru is the bringer of the light. So it may have an outpouring in the form of tasted light, you see, but all outpourings come and go. The praash doesn't go. But that light, it's not really perceivable and neither is it fully unperceivable. You see, it's not like Nirguna Brahman. But Father, that's why we call it light. No, to begin with. So we can leave this door open a bit, or too many mosquitoes.

So this self-effulgence, through which like we can't meet it as perception, we can't meet it as even the subtlest light that we can imagine, the glow of a lamp, we can't meet it in those ways. Rather, the meeting is at a completely different level. It feels the same as when you say 'awareness knows itself,' like it's that same.

Yes. In a way it's the same. But what is happening in the process of self-recognition is that awareness has always known itself. So what happens in the process of self-recognition is that that revelation is revealed to us through the eyes of the atma to our soul. Okay was that complicated okay. How many eyes? Can can if awareness forgot itself trouble isn't it? Awareness is always known itself. Any true blooded await will confirm that. You see nuna brahman forgot itself then so who is the self-recognition for then consciousness forgot. Saguna forgot. That is Brahman. You see and so can it be so that sabuna? No. It is the antana itself which is searching for its own source. You see, so this framing I find a lot more useful now. You see useful now that in in the forgetting that happened in our soul then when atma reveals the reality of itself of saguna and it is the antacana itself which recognizes its true nature.

Father, please say that part again. The part about what you said, when you said before to me that this is the part you say is perceivable and not perceivable. That's what you said.

Yes. Because we have to find some ways to convey that. How to convey the self-effulgence without making it into any perception of light. That's the key. You are amazing how you say it. That transference was not right but, you know, when you start to see all this, you recognize how great the guru is. Otherwise you're not even. The great Satguru who is sitting in your heart is the one that provides the words to come from here. And this is him, no Father. This is him.

Rad sorry say again it was too sweet. So all the sages have told us that the atma the sguru is self-reulgent. You see now what does our mind make out of that? Like a light bulb which is running by itself or a lamp which is burning by its own oil you know made up of itself. But that is the mind's version of it, the imagination's version of it. The eulgence of the atma is not perceivable or unperceivable. You see, because if it was fully perceivable, we would objectify it immediately. You would say it's an object of this shape inside my heart which is sitting there. And if it was completely unperceivable, then we could it not it would be as accessible to us as Nirvana Brahman is. You see.

If it was completely unperceivable, you see, then it would be the same as Nirguna Brahman, then it would not be God's fingernail helping us pulling us in. You see, so the only way I have found useful to explain it is to say it's both perceivable and unperceivable. We cannot deny its most subtle vibration and yet we cannot say really the vibration is perceived. Father, so this vibration in itself, is that self-luminous nature, is it?

Now at this point language will fail us. Is it a vibration? Is it light? Is it beauty? Is it truth? We can't really say these. So both unperceivable and perceivable we can call it the subtlest vibration. We can call it the I amness. We can call it all of these things. Now is the I am perceivable or unperceivable?

Unperceivable.

You see, now if it is fully unperceivable, what is the distinction between the I amness and the I itself? You see, so something wakes up. No, I am. Exactly. So the I which is in sleep state, then when it starts 'amming,' you see, then what is that am that wakes up? The I is am, I mean there is not two I, just same I. I am I am. So I amness is the light of beingness. Now its presence in us is the Atma. The presence of I am in us, in the spirit, the Atma retains that quality of what we call self-luminousness. Now we would not really say self because there's no talk about any attribute even there. So not being, not not-being. So this light which we meet in our heart which is distinct from any worldly perception of light, that is where the sages have reported on. It's like saying the lightless light, the presence of I amness, the presence of being. Being is without boundary, without any coming in going, except the birth of consciousness itself and the going back into its source. But the Atma is the presence of being within ourselves.

Now this presence, the nature of this presence is very difficult to describe in words. You see because if God made it completely quantifiable then we will objectify and make it completely inaccessible to the way of our living then it would become like niruna brahman. So he has given us his spirit so the spirit can guide us into the recognition of the saguna and the niruna. You see through the eyes of the spirit itself, through the eyes of the heart, eyes of the spirit, whatever we want to say, the disciplehip of the atma, in the disciplehip, we learn the reality of what we are, of what God is.

Anyway, the main point that all we have to do is wait at the door of the heart temple. Yeah. And I must remind myself not to over-specify these things because the over-specification can lead to our mind imagining, starting to say 'oh this is what should happen,' and becoming like producing those visuals or something like that. So just when we are there, something, our hearts keep opening more and more, the light of the Satguru presence reveals more and more to us, and from there the words may come to express some of this. You see, so the point of sharing all of this is to deepen the mystery, not to make it un-mysterious. Because if I make it unmysterious, it would be a great disservice to any of you if you feel like 'oh now imagine it like half a lamp and half a tube light.' You see, something like that. So that would be a great disservice to you. So those words are not available to specify to such a level anyway.

So this is the ever deepening mystery of God. The way he reveals himself to us in the form of dharma within in the light of the atma as Brahman and as the source of even sad Brahma what was important point is don't confuse waiting at the doorway where is coming through it own is happening do confuse that dark perception to awareness is still darkness which is perceived and awareness is beyond dark or light is completely.

It's not possible. No. And it's more like you want to check with the learned knowledge, the words that you have.

Exactly. And it's nothing fresh you want to see.

Yes. Very good. Exactly. Very good. The one who never got the invitation to the marriage wants to comment on the veracity of the vermala happening or not. Not allowed in.

Okay, let's go to Nupur. Oh, sorry. Is it okay? I have.

Father, could you explain? Right now she's seeming so precash and I'm seeming like nuna lack of.

Father, you mentioned, I think mirror also mentioned the word selfulgent, so could you could you please put some some light on that because I'm not very clear of of that.

Tough one. Okay, my dear. So all of us have heard from the sages that this is a self-luminous light which means it does not rely. All light relies on some energy source or some reflection of some other light. You see, but this light is self-created without any support, anything. But when it is shared like that, it can be shared in a way that we start imagining like a subtle light or we start visualizing a subtle light or something like that. Now that's why the closest I can come to reporting on it is to say that it is both perceivable and unperceivable. Have we come to the darshan of that light which is, we can't really say was perceived, but we cannot really say was unperceived also.

So if it was fully perceived then it would become like a mobile phone lying in front of me, it is fully perceived. So then we would objectify the Atma and it would seem like there's an object which is the Atma. If it was fully unperceivable then it would be like Nirguna Brahman and Nirguna Brahman is inaccessible to our faculties, to our usual way of functioning. And that is why God in his mercy, the Atma is more approachable. His reality is more approachable. So this both unperceivable and perceivable, we can call it the subtlest vibration. We can call it the I amness. We can call it all of these things.

So the connection is very bad now. Now that the power has come maybe it can be switched. Yes, it's still connected to the Atma. Yes. Atma thoughts, but it's coming now. It's still saying it's unstable. Maybe it'll settle in a moment or two.

Father, can you hear me? Yes. Father, you said the last thing which was audible was: don't confuse being at the door of the heart temple with the blankness, like that's the awareness. Father, that's the last point, could you repeat that?

I was saying that many times what can happen is that we realize that we have come to the end of our limitation. You see, that with attention completely withdrawn, there is a perception of a dark empty limbo-like space that may happen. You see, now to the mind that dark empty limbo-like space sounds a lot like what we use to confirm awareness. Does it come and go? Can it be born or die? You see. But it glosses over the fact that I'm still perceiving a darkness. You see, and I'm still perceiving an emptiness. So that we still have to ask: who is aware of this perception? You see, so we are not to confuse that coming to the withdrawal of attention, because it is our limit. We have to not settle on that as the finality. Now it is God's grace which has to take over and reveal to us the reality of the atma, the saguna nature of Brahman and the nirvana nature of Brahman.

Thank you. It just sometimes feels overwhelming, Father. It just feels as if, you know, will it ever happen in this life.

It's very humbling. It's very humbling because to this point I can push and prod and say: you have to come to that stillness, you can use this pointer, you're not saying the name enough, you're not inquiring enough. I can prod and do all of that. But the rest is beyond my job role and responsibilities. Then that it's a very beautiful graceful process which the inner Satguru has to take over from there. And that is why I said that true prayer is always a very humbling experience, because unlike the ways of the world where we are told 'if you just work hard enough, if you just do hard enough, you will come to it,' that doesn't apply to the revelation of God. He has to reveal himself to us.

Thank you, Father, for all your blessings and all your guidance. It's not possible without it. Thank you so much.

All the sages who have shown the way here and I'm very badly representing them and I apologize for this bad representation but I'm sure St. The AA for example must be looking at the nonsense I'm speaking and just laughing and saying this stupid child doesn't know what he's saying. All credit goes to these beautiful sages.

Okay, good. That's good. So to reach Nirguna Brahman: no gossiping is as important as doing the inquiry or taking God's name. I know our mind cannot understand these things, but it's very important to just be full of kindness, compassion, even if it feels like we're stretching ourselves to the limit to be kind when we want to be angry. These things will really help you. I know it can seem like a disconnected topic but it's not really. Humble, faithful, patient, loving, kind, compassionate, grateful. Okay, I bless you all. I love you all. Thank you.