Longing, the heap of sin
Original Marathi from the Tukaram Gatha · About Sant Tukaram
मराठी मूळ
त्रासला हा जीव संसारींच्या सुखा । तुजविण सखा नाहीं कोणी ॥1॥
ऐसें माझें मनीं वाटे नारायणा । घालावी चरणावरि मिठी ॥ध्रु.॥
कइं तें सुंदर देखोनि रूपडें । आवडीच्या कोडें आळंगीन ॥2॥
नाहीं पूर्व पुण्य मज पापरासी । ह्मणोनि पायांसी अंतरलों ॥3॥
अलभ्य लाभ कैंचा संचितावेगळा । विनवी गोपाळा दास तुका ॥4॥
Tukaram Gatha (Marathi Wikisource)
English Translation
My jiva is wearied of the pleasures of this world. Without You there is no companion. This is what my mind feels, O Narayana: let me clasp Your feet in embrace. When will I behold that beautiful form and embrace it with the joy of longing? I have no store of past merit; I am a heap of sin. That is why I have been kept from Your feet. Says Tuka, this servant appeals to Gopala: how can such rare gain come without the grace of destiny?.
We ask forgiveness for any inaccuracies in rendering Tukaram ji’s original Marathi.
In Plain Words
This life of mine is weary of worldly pleasures. Without You there is no companion at all. This is what my mind feels, O Narayana: let me throw my arms around Your feet. When will I see that beautiful form and embrace it with all my longing? I have no store of past merit; I am a heap of sin. That is why I have been kept far from Your feet. Tuka says: this servant begs of Gopala, how can such an undeserved gift come without grace?
What it means
Tukaram has grown sick of the pleasures the world offers and finds in them no true friend; only Narayana is left to want. He aches for the sight and the embrace of God's beautiful form, but he holds himself responsible for the distance: he claims no merit, calls himself a heap of sin, and reads his separation as the just result. The turn comes at the end, when he sees that the gift he wants is by definition undeserved, so it can only come as grace and not as wages. His prayer is therefore an appeal, not a claim of right: he asks Gopala for what no past merit could ever earn.
Longing and Separation
Cries from the dark night of the soul: remonstrances, complaints, and desperate yearning.
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