Longing, the ache that will not fill
Original Marathi from the Tukaram Gatha · About Sant Tukaram
मराठी मूळ
आवडी धरूनि करूं गेलों लाड । भक्तिप्रेमकोड न पुरे चि ॥1॥
ह्मणऊनि जीव ठेला असावोनि । खेद होतो मनीं बहु साल ॥ध्रु.॥
वेठीऐसें वाटे निर्फळ कारण । शीतळ होऊन खोडावलों॥2॥
तुका ह्मणे सरतें नव्हें चि पायांपें । बळ केलें पापें नव्हें चि भेटी ॥3॥
Tukaram Gatha (Marathi Wikisource)
English Translation
I went to express my love and devotion, but the longing of love is never satisfied. Therefore, the jiva has remained in a state of longing, and great sorrow stings the heart. This fruitless effort feels like forced labor, and I have grown cold and weary. Says Tuka, I cannot find acceptance at Your feet. My sins have prevented our meeting.
We ask forgiveness for any inaccuracies in rendering Tukaram ji’s original Marathi.
In Plain Words
I came with love to be petted and held. But the longing of love is never filled. So my life stays stretched out, waiting, and a great sorrow stings my heart. This effort feels like forced labor, fruitless; I have gone cold and weary. Tuka says: I am not accepted at your feet. My sins have made themselves strong, and so there is no meeting.
What it means
Tukaram is praying out of love and finding that the love itself will not let him rest. He came close to Vitthal wanting to be held, and the wanting only grew; the more he loves, the wider the gap feels. He names the dryness honestly: the devotion starts to feel like drudgery, and he has gone numb. He does not blame God; he reads his own unworthiness, his sins, as the wall between them. The poem leaves the longing open, unrelieved, naming the pain of love that has no answer yet.
Longing and Separation
Cries from the dark night of the soul: remonstrances, complaints, and desperate yearning.
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