Longing, has He really accepted me
Original Marathi from the Tukaram Gatha · About Sant Tukaram
मराठी मूळ
माझा तुह्मी देवा केला अंगीकार । हें मज साचार कैसें कळे ॥1॥
कां हो कांहीं माझ्या नये अनुभवा । विचारितां देवा आहें तैसा ॥ध्रु.॥
लौकिकाचा मज लाविसी आभार । शिरोरत्नभार दुःखाचा हा ॥2॥
तुका ह्मणे नाहीं पालट अंतरीं । तेथें दिसे हरी ठकाठकी ॥3॥
Tukaram Gatha (Marathi Wikisource)
English Translation
How can I truly know whether You have accepted me, O God? Why does nothing come to my experience? When I reflect, I remain just as I was. You burden me with worldly honor, and this crown of fame is a weight of sorrow. Says Tuka, when there is no transformation within, then all this, O Hari, looks like mere deception.
We ask forgiveness for any inaccuracies in rendering Tukaram ji’s original Marathi.
In Plain Words
You have taken me as yours, O God; but how am I to know this is real? Why does nothing come to my own experience? When I look, I am just as I was. You load worldly honor on me; this crown of fame is a weight of sorrow. Tuka says: when nothing has changed inside, then, Hari, all of this looks like a swindle.
What it means
Tukaram is pressing God on the difference between a promise and a felt reality. He has been told he is accepted, yet nothing in his own experience confirms it; he searches inside and finds himself unchanged. The public honor that has come to him is no comfort but a burden, a crown of fame that only weighs him down with grief. His test for the real thing is inward transformation, not reputation. Without that change, he dares to say, even God's acceptance feels like a cheat, and he says so to God's face.
Longing and Separation
Cries from the dark night of the soul: remonstrances, complaints, and desperate yearning.
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