We Love the Truth So Much That We Are Willing To Let Go of What We Want From It – 15th February 2021

So you try to listen but your mind is saying other things? Can you give me an example?

Like if I want to finish my studies or something, the mind will say postpone it and postpone it and something like that.

Yeah. And then you always listen to your mind, is it?

Maybe yes, I don't know how you always... it feels like you listen to your mind and that's why you don't listen to mom.

Okay, then let's see what you said: 'And I get into trouble and I postpone things and later my mom yells at me which upsets me and I never follow the rules and I never listen to her. Can you please help me?' Okay, firstly I want you to become a little more free about all of this. You see, I don't feel like at your age you should be so deeply entrenched in this kind of thinking. Just be open, just be free, just be your age. So sometimes you will listen to mom, okay? And sometimes you will listen to your mind saying, 'Okay, we'll do this later, let's go play, I don't want to study now.' It's okay.

So, you know what you have to be like? How parents are sometimes. Now, when you ask mom for something, she doesn't always give it to you, but sometimes she gives it to you. So same way with the mind. So don't worry, don't be so hard on yourself. Sometimes the mind says, 'Let's go play, let's not work.' You listen to it, you give it the candy it wants. Sometimes you realize that, oh, you have to finish your work otherwise you'll get in trouble, or you just feel like you have to finish it on time. So don't listen to the mind, just do your work, you see? So keep it simple. Just like when you ask for things, mama sometimes will give you and sometimes she won't give. But the most important thing is don't worry. Don't worry about any of this. This is not your age to be so concerned about these things.

And it is my job sometimes to get upset with you and to discipline you and say, 'Please do your work on time.' And it is your job sometimes to do it on time and sometimes do not do it. It's okay, you have license. So just be open, just be free. Don't get very caught up in these spiritual concepts. So don't get caught up in spiritual concepts. In fact, to all of them that are here, to all these grown-ups, I'm telling them the same thing, you see? All of them also too caught up in spiritual concepts. They think they know too much about all of this. I'm just making them a little more open, a little more free, just telling them to take life as it comes, enjoy it, but also not enjoying it all the time. So sometimes listen to mom, sometimes enjoy yourself. You'll be fine, you'll be fine.

Now, when you were a child, I remember when you were much younger, you used to feel like you wanted to have the darshan of God, you see? I don't know if you remember that. Now, how is that going? Did you find God or no?

No, you still looking? I have stopped.

Stopped looking? That's okay, that's okay. When you feel in your heart the same kind of looking comes, then you're very welcome to come back to satsang. Until then, just enjoy your life and know that no matter what happens, you are always taken care of. Just like your mom takes care of you, you see? Just like your mama takes care of you, there is God who is taking care of the whole universe. So nothing really is going to happen to you. Don't have to worry about anything. And these small things will come in your life. Sometimes you'll get yelled at, sometimes you will be given prizes and gifts, you see? Take both of them in your stride, enjoy both of them, but don't worry too much. You used to be a very carefree child, no? How old are you now?

Eight completed, almost nine.

Almost nine. And you much younger used to love singing and you're very carefree. So be like that.

Thank you. Thank you, Father.

So welcome with you. This is a nice surprise. This is a very nice surprise. Thank you. Okay, there is Cash. Cash, can you raise your hand so that I can find you? I found... Hello.

Have been very powerful for me, all of them. And the four bowls that I don't know what it did... sound from the... there seems to be a lot of background noise. Okay, is that controller... yes. Ah, I know I have to... is that better? Thank you, thank you. You said I got it correctly, you said that the four bowls, you see, you tried doing the exercise and you don't know what happened but something happened. We're trying to remain open and empty and not include any story in the mental narrative that has been very helpful. Did I hear correctly so far?

Yeah. Um, that happens, like that's kind of not controllable, that part. Sometimes, like you see in the past that, you know, you have been a part of their natural narrative, but then I don't identify as all the ones that's part of that. So there's not any problems at the moment. But with this, with this scene, that I thought... I don't know if it's important to mention that... I haven't had any emptiness or vastness and I just think one of these...

That's very good. That's very good. It's very good that you're not making the problem now the vastness or the emptiness. If you were to have it, how would you know? Would it be a perception that you have? And maybe I'm still expecting a perception, not like you said in the four bowls, like you want to expect a perception. So it can't be your perception. Now, if you were to try and describe when I asked you, 'Are you aware now?' that discovery, you see, of yourself as awareness, would you say it is gross? If you had to pick, it is neither gross nor subtle of course, but if you were forced to pick, would you say it's very dense and gross or would you say it's just subtle and open?

So that which is aware of your being, that which is aware that you are, that is empty of all description, empty of all conceptualization. It is the indescribable. Are you aware now? Now, what did you see to confirm this? Just here. It's not a scene. It is not something that you saw, then you can say, 'Okay, it was to the left of me or to the right of me, it was oval shaped, it was you know, tall or short.' You can't say any of these things, and yet you can confirm your awareness or yourself as awareness. Can we go that far?

So this confirmation is based on a perceptual emptiness or a conceptual emptiness, which means that it is independent of whatever may be happening perceptually or whatever may be happening in your head, isn't it? So it is untouched. Untouched by anything that may appear and disappear, and in that way we can say it is empty of anything, of everything. So don't expect the vastness or the emptiness to be an experience or a state, you see? Because now you know about every state and every experience that everything that comes, it goes. As a byproduct to your intuitive insight, sometimes you may feel like all of space, all of time is within you, but that is not so important, you see? That is just a byproduct of your discovery, which is even subtler than this and yet so immediate and so accessible when you're open.

Thank you.

Welcome. Now, what did you... what do you have to do to be free?

Nothing.

Nothing. So the body is moving like this, like this, like this, like this, like this. Does this mean something about your reality? Or if the body is sitting, does it mean anything to do with your reality? No. So this body, this movement of body-mind is also part of the realm of perceptions which wakes up upon the waking state, you see? And in the light of consciousness, in the light of your beingness, it automatically plays out as it has to.

So when we stop putting this body-mind into the narrative as I've been talking about, either of our delusion or of our freedom, then it doesn't play the central protagonist of this story of 'me'. The mind uses this perception to be the pivot around which the story of 'me' is created, you see? Now this main central point is not taken to be myself. Now it's just part of the appearance of the world. Then the ability for the mind to squeeze this one into some story of 'me' is not there anymore. Is it difficult or easy?

It's just kind of happening very... I'm very happy to hear your report here. Thank you.

Somebody has typed in another language. Looks a bit like German, but I'm not sure. Can somebody translate for me? Hmm, nice. Okay, it seemed like a private message to somebody else, so we'll leave it for now. Aha, there's a... fully recovered, feeling well? Yes, yes. Yeah, thank you so much.

You're welcome. Just Father, just wanted to come in front of you here. Yes. Did you try the four bowls? Yes, Father, but so much of arrogance right now that I was just so... just wanted to come in front of you right now. It was too identified and just offering it all up here in your presence. And oh, while I speak, I'm sensing this so much of already being offered here with your feet. There was so much of a resistance to come today in front also after a very long time. And with all the... I think all the spiritual arrogance building up, it's become like a big fat chicken for you to chop.

More seriously, what is the evidence of this arrogance?

Father, this is... the arrogance seems to be of the entire existence only as 'I'. And this the 'me', the 'me' coming everywhere is probably feeling like the evidence of this arrogance. And Father, is that... that's a clear... it's so foggy right now that there is somehow the openness to see it playing out in front and yet there is this investment in the one who wants to offer it up, wants to just, you know... since it's seen, so there is this need to give it up, offer it up. And somewhere feels like a con association or holding on to it also. Yet there is this... it's like a play and whatever happened, whatever is happening is also feeling like a play. But there is this little trap or rather where I keep on going into that again and again and that trap... I don't know, Father, if you can just show me the truth.

Sometimes I do an experiment, no? Let's try that experiment. So what you just said, I look at that as an explanation, you see? Which means that there is a set of things which are being perceived and you are determining what they are and you are giving me that explanation as to what they are. Okay? So that is what I would call an explanation. So okay, now I'll make your job simpler. You don't have to explain what is happening. You don't have to know what any of that is. You can just describe what is there right now, you see? Describe means you don't know what it is. You're just saying, 'Okay, some pulsation, some vibration, some something.' So you return to a more innocent sort of existence where...

And you are determining what they are and you are giving me that explanation as to what they are, okay? So that is what I would call an explanation. So, okay, now I'll make your job simpler. You don't have to explain what is happening. You don't have to know what any of that is. You can just describe what is there right now. You see, describe means you don't know what it is; you're just saying, 'Okay, some pulsation, some vibration, some something.' So you return to a more innocent sort of existence where you are not determining what anything is, you see? You are just telling me what is showing up for you right now. So simply, like, don't explain, just describe.

Father, right now when you ask me to describe, it feels like there's nothing. It's just nothing happening. And yet, however, when I was sitting like five minutes back, I could feel like such a separation from you. There's just so much of a big wall of, you know, arrogance, that there's resistance and doesn't want to like be exposed or come in front of you.

Yeah, yeah. So you can continue this experiment actually, but one tip I will give you is that everything that you learned after coming into spirituality, don't use that. 'This is called resistance,' 'this is called arrogance,' 'this is called separation'—all of this we didn't know, you see? Because that which blocks, or this in the life of the spiritual seeker now, the number one identification has become the spiritual identity. And what has happened is that we have these spiritual lens of constructs, and everything that we come across, we look at through that lens, you see? So all of these, if you were talking to normal regular people, like if you were talking to your family or you were talking to other friends who are not in Satsang and you said, 'But there is separation, there is resistance, you see, there is all of this happening, I feel there is a shape of me,' you see, all of that, they say, 'What are you on? You know, what's wrong with you? Just relax,' isn't it?

So yes, in our quest for knowledge, what has happened is that we have come to a new sort of knowledge which we think is knowledge, you see? Our ability to interpret things using a spiritual lens. It's like we have a mold now which is spiritual. Now everything that we process through perception has to fit into that mold somehow or the other, you see? And what has happened is that that mold is as messed up as all previous molds in the past. So in the past, we may have had a materialistic mold: 'I want this stuff, I want like this, I want my life to go like this, I want to have this, this, and this,' you see? But now that has been replaced by a new mold or new construct, you see, and we're trying to fit everything in our life through that construct. Yes.

So instead of becoming freer from our suffering, actually these days I'm noticing more and more that spiritual seekers are even more suffering than regular people. We seem to know so much more, you see, but we actually don't know any of that. And that is why when I said you describe and don't explain, because that explanation happened through that lens, you see, through the mold that we have. You see, we make meaning of what anything is. You see, so some sensation, something may be happening. You see, if you don't know all this stuff, then what can happen is that you just feel like this, there's some feeling of discomfort, you see? But now that we've become spiritual, we have to be like, 'Oh, this is a contraction. This means that I'm resisting life. This is what the shape of me is looking like. I have to get rid of this,' you see? And then the story starts: 'I've been trying for so many years, then will it happen?' All of that, you see.

With the regular people around us—I'm not using the term—the regular people around us are not suffering from any of this, you see? They may just feel like, 'What's wrong with me? Maybe I need antacid or something,' you know? Much easier, you know? We don't have so many explanations to the things, you see. So even to the child who came earlier, I wanted to tell her to just relax a bit, you know? It's not to pick up a set of spiritual concepts is not necessarily growth, unless those spiritual concepts are actually taking us to beyond conceptual knowledge, you see? That which is beyond, beyond just this ephemeral sort of knowledge which comes and goes.

So now you have this spiritual stethoscope which you are able to put on yourself and say, 'Okay, this is what's happening to me, this is what's here, this is, you see, this is the thing.' And that's the little stethoscope you have to leave here while you're here today. You have to surrender that.

Okay, Father. Yes, yes, Father. I think that'll be the biggest freedom.

Like, what is the freedom stuff? I don't know any freedom. What freedom? With a spiritual concept, you see? Yes. And for a while it will feel like my whole identity has been built on this, you see? And although in the description it sounds very simple—'Just give me the tool for spiritual diagnosis'—actually it is taking away a bulk of your identity now. Because for the past so many years, this is the identity that has been built up, and it has been built up with the intention of coming to freedom. But maybe this is the thing which has become the dust in your eyes now, you see, which keeps us, which keeps us bound. So will you be okay to not know anything spiritual?

Yes, Father. Absolutely, Father. In fact, there are these—the key is—sorry about...

Yeah, you'll just come to that. I want to say this is that don't replace this with any other knowledge also, you see? So it is not that Ananta has told me not to be spiritual, now I'll be worldly, you see? So now, you see, 'What can, should I buy? Which car?' All that is fine if it is happening naturally, but now don't have to jump into the world in that way, the world of worldly concepts or material concepts, you see? Just leave that also. Leave this also conceptually and let whatever naturally has to happen through the body can happen normally. So that is when you come to this openness, this emptiness, you see? So it is not a letting go of spiritual knowledge but reverting back to some sort of materialistic knowledge or something like that.

Father, the tendency to keep going back, picking up that spiritual knowledge is a lot.

Like this spiritual stethoscope is back with you? I thought it was with me. Okay, Father. You see, I'm not, I'm not chopping or anything, I'm just saying that I'm just showing to you how, how it can play out. Yes, yes. Tendency to go back to spiritual knowledge. So what is happening to you now? Just empty right now. And I have to say that whatever you may say, may have said earlier, your report about arrogance and all of that—my memory here of every conversation that we've had always has been that you may start off in whatever mind stuff and things like that, but I don't ever feel like at the end of any conversation that we've had you've not been open and you've not been empty. So if the arrogance in any way was very strong, then that could not be the case. Maybe it is just a lot of innocence, but the spiritual knowledge is making it seem like a lot of arrogance anyway. You don't have to worry about it.

Love you, Father. Thank you, thank you, thank you.

And this conversation is important for everybody, everybody who's here, because a lot of times we may feel like we have some special knowledge now, you see? We know what is happening, you see? But all of it that is conceptual can just be thrown aside. Whether it comes in the garb of spirituality, whether it comes in the garb of worldly, just keep it aside. And as you keep it aside, you will meet the source of true intelligence, the source of true power, which is your own Satguru presence, which doesn't have dogmatic things, you see? It's very open. One day left, left, left; one day right, right. It's not so caught up in trying to make, you know, trying to make claims which are absolutely true or something like that. Just moment to moment how life plays out with the simple intelligence, you know? The intelligence of a bird—how does it know how much to flap its wings and where to land? This natural intelligence. So that is the return to the innocence that I am speaking of.

So coming to Satsang is not the ability that you will hear the words of Satsang and now you will be able to spot all the problems that you have and try to figure out the solutions to them, you see? It is the throwing away of all of this game, all of this game of problem and solution, because in reality no such thing as a problem has ever existed, you see? It has only ever existed in your mind, in your intellect. Problem is a resistance to what is. So, so just let go. All things are perfectly resolved in the unborn, you see? And once you know this, then your job is not to say, 'Oh, I'm 50% with the unborn right now, you see, 50% with the born, and then when will this born go?' You see, when you, when you know this now, anytime you feel like there's something, something, something, just, just open and empty. Get out of that mode of problem solving, because in that mode nothing ever gets solved. I don't feel like in the eight years of sharing Satsang I've ever solved a problem for anybody, but half of you are leaving about that. It is just to see that our idea of what should not be is just an idea which is just a resistance to what is.

So you don't solve the problem, you transcend it. You leave it. And my advice to some of you would be that for, for some time don't focus on what is on this end of attention, you see? If you want a problem to solve, then solve the problem of what is on that, the other end of attention. We spend enough time trying to solve problems on that side of attention—the content side, the perception side. What about that side? That which is the witness who is sitting there? Of course the mind will quickly jump and say, 'But on that side there is no problem.' Of course, nothing is happening to it, you see? Or that to make it a—it is an idea of separation. Nothing is happening to you in your reality. So, so focus more on that which is independent of whatever the perception may be. Otherwise we'll keep playing this game of trying to resolve this game of perceptions, but nothing really gets resolved. Very good.

Okay, and this was just not, not just for Supriya. All of you must leave your spiritual stethoscope. You know, stethoscope, this thing the doctors used to put in the ear and hear the heartbeat? Yeah, my wife has a—okay, I'm digressing for a moment—my wife has a twin sister who's a doctor, okay? So what happened is one day she—she's a gynecologist, so she uses the stethoscope to hear baby and to hear heartbeat, of course, and things. So one day she was using a stethoscope, and all of us have got so used to talking on the phone, she put the stethoscope on, she put the other end, and she's saying, 'Hello?' And the patient is saying... So stop saying 'hello' in your spiritual stethoscope.

Next one says, 'Dear Ananta, I understand that I am aware of all the objects, that is thoughts, feelings, etc., but I don't know what is awareness like without any object.' Okay, this is better if you come up. You can raise your hand on the Zoom. I see you, I see you. Okay, thank you.

Can you hear that? Yes, yes. Thank you. So, actually I don't, I don't even understand maybe the awareness because translated in Hungarian, in my language, the meaning is something like knowledge or knowing of something. But knowing of something and knowledge is for me is different. So because...

Sorry, don't worry about it at all. I have looked at this question in the past quite a few times. Let's see if we can, we can look at this independent of whatever the language might be. Now, what do you see in front of you on the screen? You see the hand. Now, you are aware of the perception? Yes. So this awareness of the perception, is it the perception itself? Okay, I can go slowly. Okay, so, so like you are, you can perceive through sight that this is a hand. You can perceive through hearing what words this mouth is saying, you see? You can perceive through touch the sensations of the body, you...

Let's see if we can look at this independent of whatever the language might be. Now, what do you see in front of you on the screen? You see the hand. Now, you are aware of the perception, yes? So this awareness of the perception, is it the perception itself? Okay, I can go slowly. So, like you can perceive through sight that this is a hand; you can perceive through hearing what words this mouth is saying, you see. You can perceive through touch the sensations of the body. You can perceive through the nose the sensation of smell. All of this is not true, but it seems like that, so let's go with that paradigm for the moment. And you can perceive with your tongue the perception of taste. Now, that awareness of perception, is it sight, touch, taste, smell? No, it's none of these. So then what is it?

But I cannot say is me, not me.

Yes, let's go slowly. So this is good. So there is—what word should we use? We can continue to use awareness. Now it is more clear?

Yes, thank you. There is an awareness of perception. Now, this awareness of perception, what is its relationship with you? How do you know about it, or where is it in relation to you?

Awareness knows me. Ah, okay. And how do you know awareness is there?

Probably because the awareness let me know about itself.

So where is it? Where is awareness at? How much distance? How many centimeters from you?

I think awareness is everywhere and I am... I am...

I'll give you a tip. I'll give you a tip: don't think, just try to find out. Just look, you see. So now, just from something that you can confirm by your direct experience of it, how far are you from awareness?

Like, I don't feel then there is an 'I' and there is an awareness. Like, yeah, it is not the 'I'. The 'I' is not witnessed. This is what I feel because there is awareness and because the 'I' is just objects. I am not.

Yes, so there is no such 'I' which we think we are, you see. There is only awareness. Yes, okay. And who knows this? Who is coming to this discovery or realization?

Knows this... it's just happen. It's just... it is... no, sorry.

It's okay, it's okay. It's completely fine. Now let's go back. Who is aware of the perception of this hand? Now, what you can say is 'me'. It is you. So if you did not exist, then you could not be aware.

Yeah, but then who am I? Because, yeah, I don't understand.

Yes, so it's simpler when you don't understand, actually. So don't... it's completely fine, you see. Now, this awareness, is it a part of you? Is it an area within yourself?

No, no, no, no, no.

Where is your boundary?

I am not.

Who is discovering that you are not?

It's just happening itself.

Yes, it's happening itself. And who can confirm it is happening?

The confirmation is just happening itself as well.

Yes, I'm not asking who is doing it, you see. It is happening by itself, you see. But who is recognizing it is happening by itself? The same one who's aware of the perception of the hand. What same one? The same one. Now, the problem is that we have taken ourselves to be a 'me' which doesn't exist, you see. Now we are right when we say, 'But that means that I doesn't exist,' you see. And yet, Bhagavan Ramana Maharshi said, 'I' removes the 'I' and yet remains the 'I'. You see? So 'I' which is the pure awareness itself, it removes this false 'I' which we have taken ourselves to be—the doer, the separated one, the one that had desire. All of that is removed, you see. And yet you still remember, because you cannot deny that you are aware of this perception of this voice, you see. It is not some second-hand information. You are aware directly of this perception. So the question is...

I don't know because you said this question 'Am I aware?' is very important. Yeah, because is an easier way for me, but much probably as well than the birds has to have two beings. And when I asked myself, or when this question is coming, then if I am aware... so you're just not leading me anywhere.

Are you aware of the perception of the hand?

Yes.

So are you aware?

Yes, I am aware.

Yeah, and you see now, this 'aware', you see this 'aware', are you imagining it?

No, no, no, no, no.

Are you perceiving it?

No, I just know it.

You know it like you know other things?

No, I don't.

Yes, now where are you? If it is just there, that is confirmed, you see. Now, is there anyone other than it? Is there somebody else as well?

No, no, no.

Yeah, of course this is a process of inference and negation and things, but your intuitive insight will make all of this clear to you. It's making all of this clear to you now. You said some beautiful things. You said, 'I do not exist.' That 'I' does not exist. Awareness always is, you see. And there is nothing, no one besides this awareness. All of these are your confirmation. So I feel like it is very good. It is already very good, but not enough. This is deepening now naturally as you're going to contemplate 'Are you aware now?', 'Who am I?', any of these questions. Then you will see that there is no distinction between yourself and this awareness. You already see it, you see. But there's still some doubt which the mind is throwing at you, which is very normal for the mind to do. It will do that, but that will settle down. Thank you very much. Welcome.

Next one says, 'Guruji, I surrender all identification at your feet.' Ah, there's a hand. Okay, Kunwar is here. Hello, namaste.

So I had a question. Like, the peace is quite situational. Like, being with you here is always very peaceful, and when situations are in the comfort zone, there's peace and clarity. But when certain situations happen, the peace goes. Like for me, like going to a social event or a party or traveling—like I am to travel two days after—so it really gives me an unsettling feeling and then the peace goes away. And then instead of looking at it, I do some kind of a spiritual bypassing. I just take up a book and binge-read it for one hour and it just puts a carpet. So that spiritual reading kind of becomes an escape to escape my mind, and again it comes.

Yes, okay, okay. Good question. So, what would you have to be if you were concerned about peace being there or not being there? Like, could you be all there is, that which is pure divinity itself, if you were concerned about some state being there or not? No, you see. So this picking and choosing of states, that only this should be there and this should not be there, you see, this is how the mind is using the notion of peace to rob you of your peace in a way, you see. That 'In my perception only this should be there, this should not be there,' you see. Now, what is actually moving? You talked about traveling, you talked about the states changing and how you have sort of like a social thing, fear of social gatherings and things like that, you see. So what is actually moving and what doesn't move at all? Is the question clear? So you're sitting in your room peacefully reading a book versus you're surrounded by twenty-five people. I'm not saying you can't have a preference for that, you see. You can still have a preference for that, but if it shakes you up, then it's worth looking at this. It's worth looking at this and then we can say, 'Okay, now what is changing when all these things change, and what remains unchanged?'

The awareness remains unchanged even when the anxiety is there, but I don't want to have that anxiety. I just want to have equanimity.

Yes, yes. And this 'I' is which one? Is it the changing one or the unchanging one?

Changing.

So in the realm of change, can you find such a 'me'? Can you find this 'I' that has this desire? 'I don't want' is also a desire. Whether you call it aversion or desire, it is still a desire. Whose aversion is this? Of the ego personality. Does it have any manifest existence or tangibility even in a manifest way? Where is the location of this ego?

I can't find a location. I can't find it.

So would it be a fair deal to say till you can locate this one, we don't dance to its tunes? No, that is very good. That is very good. I feel it's fair. If something is going to be authoritative and say, 'Do this, I want this, I want three pizzas, I want two cokes,' and we are just running around to cater to it, you see, and all evidence we have of it is like a voice we hear... you see, it's like somebody has put a speaker in this room and somebody says, 'Ananta, get me my plate of food.' You see? But who are you? Where should I come and give it to you? Even if I were to get this to you, all these are fair questions to ask, isn't it? So who does this voice represent? Till we discover that, we don't take its wants and its dislikes so seriously. Yes, so that is one beautiful contemplation. Other is that, in fact, you can experiment with this since you're traveling in two days and things, you see, whether in the movement of the body and the movement of the change in perception, are you actually moving in any way? This you can experiment with a bit. You see where you are, and if you can localize that in any way firstly at all, and then you see if any movement or change is happening to you, the only one there is, you see. But for that we have to keep this one who has his demands and desires, you have to investigate that one and see if it's worth our time. It's like somebody knocks at your door and says, 'Mr. Kunwar, please give me all your documents from school, college, everything.' Then first you will say, 'What? Who are you? Who are you to ask for these things?' The same way, when this one says, 'I want only peace, I don't like to travel, I want to see,' investigate who is this one to demand all these things.

I just noticed a kind of a spiritual bypassing in me. Like if somebody is depressed, they eat a lot to counter that depression, or somebody smokes a cigarette. So for me, that escape mechanism, I read my way into my... you know, to escape from the mind. It just puts a carpet, but it doesn't get resolved.

Yeah, it's like a crutch. So in our intellect, you see, in our intellect we can play these games of trying to embrace, embrace, embrace, or trying to avoid, avoid, avoid, or bypass, you see. So what I'm speaking of is neither of these. It is nothing to do with the movement of the body also, that if you pick up a book to read or you don't want—all of that, I'm not speaking at that level at all. I'm referring to you as consciousness, of which this whole play is happening in your light. Now, what can happen is that the way to avoid, the way to not meet or to bypass, is only one. And that way is to label it, to say, 'I don't need to look at it anymore because I know what it is.' You see? 'I know what something is.' Now, if you already defined it as a fear, then already it has gone into the box of avoidance. If you've already defined it as a desire, then it's already gone into a box of avoidance. I feel like we have this conversation also where this is the nature of the mind, you see. And it can happen in these social situations also. Like just because you mentioned social, I can share this example again. We are very quick to stereotype based on appearances, you see. So if we see somebody is twenty feet away and, 'Okay, he looks like he's an American,' so we already starting to say, 'American must be like this, must be like that, must be like this. He's different from us Indians,' you see. All of this. So this is the way that we come into avoidance or in a sort of bypassing of the true meeting that can happen, you see, with our presumptions of being able to decipher it. Now, so what happens is that something is showing up. See, we are fully with that without needing to define or to understand conceptually. Our attention is so fully with something, with whatever it is, that there is no space left for labeling. There is no space left for interpretation, you see, which is an avoidance. Now, there's a fallacy in this world which is happening also, which is very much around this term 'spiritual bypassing'. You see, now that fallacy...

Decipher it, you see. Now, so what happens is that something is showing up. See, we are fully with that without needing to define or to understand conceptually. You see, our attention is so fully with something, you see, with whatever it is, that there is no space left for labeling. There is no space left for interpretation, you see, which is an avoidance, you see. Now, there's a fallacy in this world which is happening also, which is very much around this term 'spiritual bypassing.' You see, now that fallacy is that if it is an accepted norm that this is what it is, you must accept that norm and not try to use spirituality to be rid of it or something like that. You see, it's in a way like saying, 'I agree to that.' In a way that if your car is broken down, then don't say, 'Oh, I'm spiritual and you know, God is going to come and take care of it.' This kind of stuff, you see, that can be sort of a spiritual bypassing.

But what happens is that many times people who are speaking about spiritual bypassing are actually propagating the spiritual bypassing without realizing, or a sort of bypassing without realizing, you see. Because they are saying that, 'Oh, but accept that you have this problem, accept that you are depressed, accept that you are this thing' or whatever it may be. But they're talking about an acceptance of a label, whereas I am talking about acceptance of pure perception, you see. And that is the only difference, but it is a major difference, I feel. You see, I am saying be so fully open and in acceptance of whatever may be appearing that you don't even need the crutches or the lens of a label. You're meeting it completely fully, you see.

Now, what many times these proponents of these terms like spiritual bypassing are saying is that, 'Accept that this is happening to you,' you see. And that is full of so much myth-making, especially the myth around the 'you,' you see. And then work from that standpoint that 'this is happening to me.' You see, that is also sort of bypassing, which is that without investigating whether there is such a 'me,' without investigating whether I have ever experienced the same sensation twice, you see, we are quick to lump sensations in a basket and say, 'This is this, this is this, this is this,' you see. And then we are working from that box, which is too restrictive. So I'm saying let go of even this avoidance and this bypassing and meet everything as is, fully. You see, you're with me? It's a bit of a subtle difference.

So, spiritual bypassing is not that we must accept some labels and then pick up some more other labels to try and put some harm on those false labels, you see. Just let go of all of this and meet everything fully. Just fully. Full openness, full emptiness, and then there is no concept of bypassing. There is no need of any sort of this understanding. This is very helpful. Thank you, thank you, thank you. Very good.

Okay, next one says: 'Father, I wrote you already. Yet in general, I do not have any friend, or I do not love anyone personally. I usually get annoyed or offended or question almost everything. Only the meetings which unfold by its own are the most beautiful and accepted here. I don't know if there is something for this one to see.'

Okay, all of this that you think you know, just don't know any of it. Just return to the state before you could know any of this. Don't know that you have a friend or you don't have a friend. Don't know whether you love someone or you don't love someone. Don't know whether you get annoyed or offended, you see, because whose reports are these? 'Only the meetings which happen unfold by its own are the most beautiful,' you see. But what doesn't happen by its own, you see? So there is one God who's doing this stuff which is happening on its own. Now who else is there to do the stuff? Is it just notional, just emotional? There's only one cause to all things. If there is such a thing as a cause, it is only consciousness.

Then you say: 'I am happy to move alone for now, yet maybe it would be nice to get along a little bit more.' Life can determine those things as long as you are focused on your goal, which is yourself, you see. And I don't mean this in a worldly way; I'm saying which is your discovery of your truth, your self-realization. As long as that is your primary longing in your heart, then everything else can play as it must. See, after I met Guruji, I just used to enjoy just sitting in my room, not being social, not having many friends, just my family. And it just started unfolding that now all the sharing of Satsang happens, all of you are here. I didn't decide any of this, or I didn't decide not to have any of this. In your openness, in your neutrality, all things now, you see, can flow just perfectly.

Next one says: 'Wow, wow, thank you for that letting go of resolving. So wonderful. I found this one is distracted with the feeling of needing to resolve discomfort. It is just a distraction. Let go of everything. Stabilize me here. You are my anchor.' Very beautiful, very good. You see, we don't need to look at anything that is appearing in perception, you see, either with the need to embrace or with the need to show our side. Everything and whatever attention has to do, something to go towards something, will also go just naturally. You don't have to put yourself in a position of a decision-maker who is meant to embrace or ignore. Just allow it to unfold. Just in your openness, when you're conceptually empty of interpretation, of narratives, of labels, then you will find that everything, attention also, goes very naturally where it is meant to go.

You who has a nice spiritual description for what's happening to them, a good spiritual idea about what is happening to you, how free are you? How much are you resisting? Who knows these things? How many of you are almost there? They need the final push, huh? How many think that they have got it, but if they say they've got it, they're scared to sound arrogant? All of these are the readings from the spiritual stethoscope.

Now, next one says: 'Father, it just feels like there is an inability to talk because all thoughts here are based on wanting to report to you. I think I'm understanding Papaji. Just keep quiet.' Yeah, this open and empty is 'keep quiet.' Maybe if you want to see more, we'll talk more in a moment. Okay, um, this one is Manisha. Is it you? You can come, my dear.

Namaste, Namaste. I feel the same thing, like, you know, it's just that. But still, like, you know, waiting for the one push from the... if you feel that you're almost there, yeah, you're waiting for the final push. Yes, it's right to say also, don't know, but it's completely fine. It's completely fine.

So, so I'm telling you that right this moment, in this very moment, you are free. You are free and everybody is free. Yes, everyone is complete. There is lots to say, but you feel like there is nothing no more. Just be there in that. Yeah, yeah. When you are not taking yourself to be the mind, you are not taking yourself to be the ego, you are free. Yes. When you are taking yourself to be the ego, you are said to be bound, but you are never really bound. It is just consciousness playing this game, yes, you see. So it is the same for Ananta also. Yes, in this moment he is not taking himself to be the body-mind, therefore we can say that he is free. Yes. But if he is taking himself to be Ananta and identifying with these things, then he is as bound as anybody else. So, so it is a question of moment to moment. If you are open and empty in this moment, you are free. Yes. If you have picked up identification, then you are bound, you see. So in this moment you are free, and that is as free as anybody, as any sage has ever been. Yes.

But it doesn't mean anything for us personally. Yes, yes, Father. It's very like you can't explain, but just, just be and it's just nothing. Yes, yes, yes. Thank you, Father. Thank you very much.

Now, in that, in that just being and just nothing, is there someone there who's feeling like they're almost there? Because that is just another thought, just another. And don't get involved with this thought because I've seen many who have been feeling like they're almost there for many years. So this thought can sound very humble, you know, 'I'm almost there, I just need the final push from the Master, then I'll be free,' and it can linger on for many, many years. So let go of this thought.

Yes, yes. It just flies, like it's just floating on that and moves on. Yes, exactly. Thank you. Very good. Okay, thank you, Father. Thank you.

Okay, Madalina wants to come. You can come back. Namaste, my... I raised my hand to expose something and it's not so easy because um, it seems that I'm surrendering things in pieces. I don't know if they are big because it seems that I have a lot to surrender and seems that a lot is being picked up.

Make big slices of the cake instead of the crumbs, you know, small crumbs today, these big slices. So I used to say this actually, if you'll give me a moment, I'll share this example where many times what can happen is that basically our identity is like a photo album. It's like a photo album with various ideas we have about ourselves and we have these compartments. So there's a parent idea, there is a child idea, there is a student or a disciple idea, there is a spiritual idea—all of these sections. So what used to happen initially is that there were some coming to Satsang who every day were giving me one, like one photo from the album. 'Can I throw this at you? Can I throw this at you?' you see. So I said, can we actually start looking section by section? You tear out that section and you surrender it instead of photo by photo. So that's what I meant when I said as long as there are big pieces, then it's okay. So what you can do is the theme, the theme behind the idea that you wanted to surrender, you can surrender the whole theme.

I thought I did that but it follows me. I don't have many things; my photo album has only two pictures: one big one and the passport photo one. So I'm trying to, I'm trying to surrender the big one but it's very hard. I'm... it's clingy.

Okay, keep it. Keep it.

I don't want to keep it. This is the thing, because sometimes they don't want to keep it, maybe causing more suffering than the photo itself. It seems that it stays in my... oh, I don't know how to say.

That is also a photo, and that photo could be bigger than the bigger one. Just have to ease up on ourselves a little bit, you see. Otherwise it creates this sort of stuck situation where we can't let go also, but we feel like we have to let go also. So we feel like we are stuck. That stuck situation could be the biggest photo in the photo album.

Okay, I'm not stuck, but I do observe my mind being creating all this energy around the fact that I have to resolve things in somebody's life, in Anna's life. I think everybody knows who the big picture is. I can probably change my profile picture. And it stays between... like when you say stay open and empty, I can do this in Satsang, I can do this if I sit two hours and I let go things, but in the normal course of living, it's a lot of mind energy going into the same direction.

Sure, I understand that. Firstly, if you are fully open and empty during Satsang and for two hours even otherwise, then you're already doing quite well. So firstly I want to say that that's very important, you see. Just to be open and empty even for a moment is very good. It's very good, you see. So if you say that throughout Satsang you can be open and empty and then when you're just sitting for two hours you can be open and empty, very good already, you see. Now, the rest of the time if you're getting too much into the doership idea that you are the doer and you have to do things and you have to resolve things, then find out how you're doing things right now. How are you nodding your head? How do you do it? How are you smiling? How you do it?

I don't know.

You don't know? Then how can you do? You see, this is the whole game. This is very good for you to see because actually the mind, the ego, doesn't know how to move a finger. It doesn't know how.

Ready, you see. Now, the rest of the time, if you're getting too much into the doership idea—that you are the doer and you have to do things and you have to resolve things—then find out how you're doing things right now. How are you nodding your head? How do you do it? How are you smiling? How do you do it? I don't know; you don't know. Then how can you do? You see, this is the whole game. This is very good for you to see because actually the mind, the ego, doesn't know how to move a finger. It doesn't know how to move a finger, and yet it feels like it is controlling this life. Do you know how to move your finger? How you do it?

When you ask me this question, I literally feel I can't move my fingers.

But because the mind doesn't know, you see, life knows. Your being knows, and only being can do it, you see. But the mind only is the claimant to the doing of everything and the experiencing of everything, but can neither do nor experience. You see, that's why if I ask the mind, 'Do you know how to do it?' see, of course, I sometimes will say, 'Yes, of course, here, I'll show you. Here, moving the finger.' You see? How you do it? 'Oh, you know, in the body these processes happen and the neurons are fired in the brain.' How you fire a neuron? Does anyone know how to fire a neuron? Nobody knows. So, unless it is the will of consciousness, the will of being, then no movement can happen. You see, it is like a little boy standing on the edge of the stream with a twig in his hand saying, 'I'm controlling the flow of the river. You see, I'm controlling where the river is going.' That is the nature of our mind. Life is moving, everything is moving in the light of consciousness, but the mind comes and says, 'I did this, I did not do this, I should have done this, I should not have done that.' You see, all of this stuff.

Who is doing it? There is a sense of responsibility about what's happening, I think.

Yes, but if you have a sense of responsibility but you don't have the power to do or not do, then how is that going to work out? You see, and what is the outcome of this? The outcome is either guilt or pride. If you do some, quote-unquote, 'do something well,' then there can be pride. The same sense of responsibility can become pride. The same sense of responsibility can become guilt if you feel like it didn't go well. You see, once you start to recognize that there is no individual doer of all actions... you see, I don't want to say you are not the doer because I am referring to you as consciousness, actually. So you as consciousness are the only one with will, the only one with this projective light. But this doership, this doing, is the will of consciousness; it is never understood by the mind. So when the teachers say that you are not the doer, they are talking to you as the mind or the ego, you see. So you, when you take yourself to be the mind, when you take yourself to be the ego and you take yourself to be the limited self, then that 'you' is never the doer, neither is it the experiencer.

How do you say clearly that you're not a doer?

You see, you can investigate. You can investigate the mechanics of it if you like, if you're oriented that way, or you can trust my words. Either way.

I like the easy, easy way. How to trust your words? But if there's doubt, then you can always investigate.

You see, okay. How do I do something or how do I not do something? Who is this 'I' who is doing or not doing? Where is it controlling this body from? Where is the control center for this 'you'? You see, does it have a compartment behind your eyes? It's sitting there like that Disney movie, you know, Inside Out? Or what was it? Yeah, have you seen that? To the kids, Inside Out is a nice one where these—now what are they called?—so all these emotions are sitting in a control center and they're driving this body and, you know, sometimes they're fighting with each other: 'I'm going to drive, no I'm going to...' Are you one of those? Who is it? Who is it that's driving this body? I was saying the other day that most of it... like, what is the most important thing that you need right now? Right now?

Suppose that you are a body. Suppose that you are a body. What is the most important thing you need right now? My piece of chocolate, I think.

No, but more than that. Okay, maybe it's a bit tricky. So you need to breathe. You need your heart to beat. You need all the processes, digestion and everything, to work. If any of that goes away, then we are in big trouble, isn't it? Correct, you see. So who's doing all of that? Who has the intelligence to do all of this—fight disease, create digestive juices, to create antibodies, and to create all this seeming mechanics that goes on in the body? Whose intelligence is that? Does that... like Pankaj Ji comes here sometimes and says, 'But we don't say I'm not running my kidney properly or I'm not running my liver properly.' Who is running all of that? So if that one is intelligent enough to run this, then who is running the gravitation, the movement of all of these planets and stars and electricity and all of this stuff? Who's doing all of that? No committee of people is doing it. No committee of humans is doing it. So there must be a greater intelligence than we have which is responsible for all of this. And as Guruji says, we just feel like, 'Oh, but my life, it cannot run; for that I have to do it.' One moment we cannot beat our heart if that intelligence stops working. That's true. If it is not the will of consciousness, then the next breath will not come. So before we can have all the other stuff, which is mostly just conceptual stuff, we must recognize that a greater intelligence in many cases is doing all of this, the important stuff. We are just playing around in our hands saying, 'What should I do? What should I do?'

I feel like asking for a sadhana for my next day or next time until we meet again, which I hope is Friday. Any sadhanas?

No, I've given so many sadhanas. Open and empty. You can remain open and empty. Open and empty. Actually, there is one satsang where I have given all the sadhanas, all the Atma Gyan that I know about. This one, I'm not even joking. This one satsang where I've said, 'Okay, start like this. Then if that doesn't work, then do this. If that doesn't work, then do this.' I've given the whole flowchart of what... Thank you. So what happened to the next hand? There was Shivani. Then while she comes back, there's a quote possibly from satsang here: 'I think I move' is the same as saying 'I make the sunrise.' The same one that is moving this body is making the sun move also. So either we say that I am not doing any of this, you see, or we see that all of this is happening in my life as consciousness.

Next one says: 'Father, one more thing. I am thinking about food all the time and I love to eat so much, but it is too much because more than anything I am thinking about what I will eat.'

As you're moving from head to heart, it can be sometimes like this, that thinking about food can become a sort of escape. And many in this room are associating with that question and relating with that question. So it can happen that thinking about food can become like an escape mechanism. But you see, as you're more and more learning to trust your heart, then even that will, even that will settle. Now, here I might not be the best one to talk about this because for three years I was doing this intermittent fasting—the sixteen hours of not eating, eight hours of eating was allowed—but now for the last six, seven months I'm not doing that also. So I'm eating a fair bit myself as well, but I don't feel like I'm thinking so much about it.

And says: 'Beloved Father, just a blessing for Lucia Lagana and her husband. Family is very much appreciated. I heard from her today again that she and her husband are really nearly starving because of the lack of money. Husband even with severe heart problems. It's like a curse in her family.' Okay, I was sorry, my dear. She said, 'Don't read it out loudly now.'

Okay, so we will do... we're going to help her. We're going to help her. One of you remind me. Thank you. Thank you for bringing it to my attention. We'll do something about this. Thank you. Shivani says, 'You have to unmute me.'

Can you hear me?

I can hear you, but we don't see you yet on the screen.

That's because you're mumbling. Mumbling, I'm sorry. It's like... I can't remember what I said, what to say quickly. Oh yeah, you're talking about like reporting and, you know, figuring out what's happening and all that. I was just noticing like when I'm in satsang, it's always like, 'Oh, you know, tell Father this, tell Father that, tell others, you know, oh this is really sinking in,' or, you know, whatever. That's all, all the thoughts are related to... did you hardly do that completely? Yeah, yeah, sure. It just when you said it, I was like, 'I can't speak because every thought is about that.' So how do I speak now? I just have to not speak.

And none of these, none of these are thoughts? No?

Yeah. So the thing was that kind of came to me was like, so is that what Papaji means? Like just keep quiet. Like don't jump onto those thoughts, don't follow kind of thing. Just keep quiet? Yeah, because as soon as you said it, I realized that so much of them are related to exactly that. It is related to what's happening, you know.

Yes, yes. So tell me, what is happening?

Well, at that time or now?

Now. Yeah, let's see. Let's try now. Which thought can represent what is happening?

Yeah, well, it's kind of like whatever's happening is happening, and then to actually have to like share it, it seems like you have to use thinking to share it.

Right. But a lot of the sharing can happen without thinking also. Like, no thinking is happening about these words, and yet these words are just appearing from here.

Well, that's what I was sort of contemplating too, because it's like, am I now thinking too much about what I'm thinking because I'm thinking what are you saying, you know, like I am thinking. Yeah, it's like just share it. If you're sharing what Father says you shouldn't do, it doesn't matter. Like, that's what's in, that's what's there. So instead of thinking about, 'Well, then I can't share that,' you know, that was what was also being contemplated. Like, 'Now I can't speak, I just can't talk because Father said not to say that,' you know. And that's there, you know. If you were to ask me in that second what's happening now, it would be this urge to share that. Yeah, those appearances, those thought appearances. Yeah, that was it. I didn't want that. Anyway, did you try the four bowls? I'm asking everybody. Would you like the four bowls? Man, who can he care for?

My quick test: everyone gone to deep meditation. Put your hand up if you can recap the four bowls. Ah, okay, Maria. Good, I like it. Okay, let's see if I can explain it.

Okay, because I really like that one. There are like four bowls, and the first one is the knowledge of the perception that you... the second one is the concepts, intellectual concepts. And the third one is the spiritual concepts that we get. And the last bowl is what we are, what we are in satsang. But well, that's what I got.

That's not bad. That's very good. Let me expand on that a bit. So the first bowl—and this is for all of you who've done this, not heard this before, but actually for everyone—so in the first bowl is all the knowledge that you have gained through your perceptions, you are gaining, seemingly gaining in this moment through your perception. Whatever the perception may be, every knowledge that you gain through perceiving something goes into the first bowl. The second bowl is intellectual knowledge, like a lot of spiritual knowledge. Then we have conceptual knowledge which we have not perceived; in fact, it is contrary to what we may be perceiving sometimes, you see. So we may be perceiving that the earth is quite flat, you see, but we know that the earth is a sphere. Or we may be perceiving that the sun rises and it sets, so the sun comes and goes, you see, around the earth, but it is actually—we know now—that it is the earth that goes around the sun. So this sort of conceptual knowledge, and especially this intellectual knowledge...

Then we have conceptual knowledge which we have not perceived; in fact, it is contrary to what we may be perceiving sometimes, you see. So we may be perceiving that the earth is quite flat, you see, but we know that the earth is a sphere. Or we may be perceiving that the sun rises and it sets, so the sun comes and goes, you see, around the earth, but it is actually—we know now—that it is the earth that goes around the sun. So this sort of conceptual knowledge, and especially this intellectual knowledge—all mathematics, every equation, every inference, everything that we get through our reasoning—goes into the second bowl.

And I'm aware that it's part of the first two, but it's important to call out separately, is that everything that you want. Mostly spiritually, you want to find the Self, you want to stay as the Self, you want freedom, you want to be in the state of vastness, you want to be whatever you want out of spirituality; and every other desire goes into the third part. Now, what is in the fourth bowl?

My... where are you? Air? Air is perceived?

No, you don't know air unless you feel it against your skin or you... it's still a perception.

Ah, um, I'm guessing.

Guessing is inference. Guessing is inferring. Guessing is to use the intellect, so it goes into the second bowl. They're not conceptual, not desire, and not anything that you get through perceptions. Any knowledge that you think you know something because you perceive something goes into the first bowl. Anything that you think you know just conceptually because you heard it from a credible source, because you calculated it, because you inferred it—all that you use your reasoning for—goes into the second bowl. And every desire that we have, especially the spiritual desire of wanting to be the Self or to stay as the Self or to be free, all of the spiritual desires are going to go into the third bowl.

So, I'm in the fourth bowl? Is that an inference? It's... or not? It's just a process of negation. What can remain must be me. Well, it's kind of like what's left, so it must be me. So that's an inference?

So that's the second bowl.

I don't know, Father. What's in there? In which bowl did you go?

Well, right now I feel like I'm in the concepts bowl because I'm trying to give you an answer. Sorry. Okay, in which bowl did the witness of concepts go?

In the fourth bowl? Me to tell you? I'm like, whatever's in there, who's in there? You're going to tell me eventually. I already said, but...

Then for those who feel like they don't know, you see, then ask this question, no? Are you aware now? Are you aware now?

Yeah.

So that confirmation, did it come from perception or concept or desire? Where did it come from?

Um, just knowing. Just... no, just because it is. Because the answer's yes, because it is. Like, I don't know, I don't know, Father. Just because it's the right... not like the right conceptual answer, it just is the right answer.

Yeah, how do you know that? Because for anything else, if you said 'I don't know,' you would have said 'no,' you see. You would have said 'no.' Is there a blue cat on the screen? Because you don't perceive it, you would have said 'no.' You don't have the concept there should be a blue cat on the screen, so you would have said 'no.' But in this case, you say 'yes,' but 'I don't know how I know.' Is there any other knowledge like this?

It's like you say there's not a phenomenon to know, but you know. Like, you just know.

Yes. It's a stupid question to ask 'how do you know?' because you don't know because... just, I just do. Doesn't sound spiritually glamorous. We call it intuitively, intuitive insight. Now, there in your intuition where you know yourself in this simple way as this awareness, you see, is there any misunderstanding about who you are? Is there any trouble of any sort?

Yes, I know, because you only have to kind of contemplate or look or make... you know, check if you get distracted with the... yes, there is a bit of trouble, you know.

So, the speaking of the 'yes,' you see, happens in this material plane, so I'm not talking about that. I'm talking about where it is just known, where you can say 'I don't know how, but it just is,' you see. And that which I'm calling intuitive insight—there in that intuitive insight, you see, which we invite when we use a pointer like 'Am I aware now?' or 'Who is aware of my being?' or 'Who am I?'—any of these pointers bring us to that intuitive insight which is in none of the first three bowls. Now, if we don't go to the first three and just remain with that intuitive presence, then what? What complaint or trouble do we have?

If you don't have any trouble, Father, the trouble comes when you try and just explain it or share it or put it into words.

Yeah. Um, so for some time, that's why I say that for some time, allow me to make the claims on your behalf. But it's not a special place, but I can say just stay there with your intuition, with your intuitive intelligence. And how to stay there? To stay there is just to not go with the first three bowls. I remain independent of the first three bowls. Ask your question.

But yeah, can you actually speak without... because what I was starting with before, like, it seems like the speaking comes from the thinking.

Yeah, then the sharing of Satsang would not be possible, you see, if this intuitive presence was unable to use this body as an instrument for its own voice, then it would not be the sharing of Satsang. So it is completely possible to let go of the mind, to let go of conceptual knowledge, to let go of what the seeming perceptions are telling us, and in that letting go, just to allow this body to be used by your intuitive intelligence is the sharing of Satsang.

Okay, because yeah, um, I don't know, for me it feels as though that appears and then the mouth speaks what that says. Keep saying, just don't stop talking how it seems, Father. That okay, yeah, but did you think of all these thoughts first? I think that's how it seemed for others that it... did you think of all this then? It's when you're quiet and blah blah blah blah blah blah blah.

Yeah, when you listen, and even then many times it doesn't represent what was thought, no? It goes on its own. Okay, yeah, I just noticed that also with the little children. You will just notice that as they start to learn language, they're not thinking first; they're just like, whatever's coming, they're just saying it. Sometimes you can see, like for me sometimes I see, yeah, a few seconds before the mouth says it.

Yeah, because it seems like to speak you have to think, kind of thing.

Yeah, that's a fallacy because so much speaking happens without the thinking, you see. Actually, in the world they say it's a good thing if you speak only after you think. They will in fact tell you, 'Don't speak without thinking.' So consciousness can use this instrument in whatever way it wants, and it is not dependent on the thought appearing to be able to move this mouth. It's only when we take ourselves to be the doer, an individual doer, that we feel like these prerequisites must be there. Why must God have to wait for a thought before words can come? Yeah, okay, because yeah, I did notice both; sometimes it's there before, sometimes it's not, even it's happening, it's happening.

Okay, the main thing is that how to remain with that intuitive intelligence? Many may say, 'How can I go there? How can I access it?' You can't go there or access, actually; you just have to let go of the false means of knowledge, you see, what they're in the first three bowls. You just have to let go of that and then you are automatically in your intuitive intelligence. A lot of you gave answers which were coming from the intellect, so put all that in the second bowl. We got very used to the Neti Neti and things, you know. But the thing is that if you do the Neti Neti also that way, then also if you're just arriving at an intellectual conclusion that 'after being what or not my being because human being comes and goes, then what? Oh, I don't find anything, so that must be the Self'—if this kind of inferring is going on, then that is not the true Neti Neti. It must bring you to this intuitive vision, intuitive insight.

This is the master key. This is the main master key I have for all of you because it takes away the spiritual struggle. Like, the spiritual struggle is about trying to find God or the Self in the three bowls. Trying to find God as an experience or a state, as a perception. Trying to figure out God as everything; many believe that once they are convinced that all is God, then they will be free. So it's a question of conceptual conviction. It is not that. See, many feel like they are only in it because they want something out of it. 'I want this, I want that, I want to feel better'—all of these things, you see, which at best are the byproducts of the spiritual discovery. But as long as it leads the way, it seems to get in the way. If our desires lead the way, then they can seem to get in the way.

So there must come a point in our life that we love the truth so much that we are willing to let go of what else we want from it. Or we love the Master so much, or we trust the Master so much, that we are willing to let go of everything else because just that is his guidance or her guidance for you to follow. Like, you come to that point so that your own desires don't get in your way. So that's how the struggle is removed. And as you let go, you see, if there's something independent of these, you will notice that you are, you will recognize that you are. How do you do it? Like Shivani was saying, just like that, you see. What is that? We've undervalued that 'just like that,' you see, because it is so natural. It's so original to us, you see. It's so pristine and ever available. And then the mind can doubt it because of that and say, 'This can't be it because then why are people doing headstands for hundreds of years in caves to discover this?' But it is this, I promise you it is that. There is nothing beyond that—that discovery of yourself as the pure Self, as awareness itself.

Okay, I missed many of the chat. Ah, thank you, one reminded me that the earth rotates on itself, not around the sun; yes, revolves around the sun, you're right. 'Is it necessary to ask the "Am I aware?" as it seems effortful to do so in contrast to just remaining in pure perception?' No, it's not necessary. If you're just open and empty, which means to remain in pure perception, then the truth of what you are is apparent to you.

Next one says, 'Namaste dear Father. So in short, what comes in the first bowl is objects of five senses?' Yes, but all perception, you see. Even if you're closing your eyes and imagining a tree, we can't say that these eyes are looking at the tree, but it's still perception. So even if you say it is extra-sensory perceptions, it just goes into the bowl of perception. 'So second bowl is the sixth sense, which is mind and its object?' If you define it that way; many call the sixth sense like an intuitive ability. But if you call the mind—so all the capacity to reason, all the intellect, all the judgments, interpretations, all the calculations and machinations—everything goes into the second bowl. So then the mind and body is gone, yes. 'Then third bowl is a repetition of what can be in the first two?' Yes, so it is specifically calling out because I see so many of you tripping on this spiritual desire about trying to be in a particular state or 'how does it help me to... I found this recognition,' you see. That's my third bowl, yes.

And the question is, 'What's left in the fourth bowl?' Yes, that's right. 'If any spiritual practice takes us to what is, means that it's acceptable?' Yes, yes, or more specifically, if it removes identification from what is not. Because actually nothing can really take you to that; you just can do a—who was saying the other day?—short circuit. Do a short circuit on what is not and make the truth of what you are apparent to you. The next one says, 'Love, love, love and thank you for the warmth of your embrace and everything.' Thank you, thank you. Next one says, 'I missed the bowls point, Father. Which are the four bowls?' Okay, so I just finished.

That it's acceptable, yes, yes. Or more specifically, if it removes identification from what is not. Because actually, nothing can really take you to that. You just can do a—who was saying the other day?—short circuit. Do a short circuit on what is not and make the truth of what you are apparent to you. The next one says, 'Love, love, love, and thank you for the warmth of your embrace and everything.' Thank you, thank you. Next one says, 'I missed the bull's point, Father, which are the four goals?' Okay, so I just finished repeating, so you must have heard that, but also there's a separate highlight by now on what's that. 'And is it possible to be on the direct path and the progressive path at the same time?' It is impossible to be on any path. 'Is witness or observer just a mental construct?' Yes, so the witnessing or the pure awareness is not a construct, but the term, of course, continues to be a construct. But the witness or the observer is a constant. So much love and gratitude. Thank you, thank you. 'Is it true to say the more single-pointed you are in your focus on the guru and God, the more they will be single-pointed focused on you?' In a way. In a way. It depends on what you mean by guru. 'Father, is this pointer good to describe the fourth goal: what is, is not, and what is not, is?' It's not bad. It's okay. It's good, yeah. Ah, there's a hand up. I'm so sorry. Okay, yes. So sorry, I saw it earlier and then it just left my attention. You can come back. Thank you.

Thank you so much. Um, this question is—I should give some context. My life has been, you know, for the most part, it's very peaceful and tranquil, but there is one question that, or vasana, that constantly recurs, and I think it's a shared one amongst many people. I'm a single man and I feel quite lonely, and of course during this time, particularly, it has amplified this need for connection and intimacy and so on. I involve myself in some relationships and they usually end disappointedly. It does not give me the answer or be the overall solution for me, and I go into a state where the practice of awakening or resetting myself begins once more. I feel that I have passed this challenge or this sticking block, and maybe a new relationship will appear in my life and I think, 'Oh great, finally I have resolved these problems and now maybe I can have a family like many people I know in this life.' It has since not happened, and this pandemic or whatever has really made those desires or feelings more pronounced. I understand it's a very hard biological code, you know? It's a very strong, compelling feeling for me to want to have a family and a partner and so on. I try my best to not invest in this story or to attach to it, but I would be lying to everyone or myself that it's gone. It's still there and, as I say, it's quite strong. There was a previous member's question talking about the doing and, you know, sometimes I get into a very strong doing situation for this. For example, maybe I will try to contact many people and talk online and try my best to resolve it on the level of form, not from the inside. But from what I gathered there, you know, if I'm not the doer as in the mind, then is it the will of consciousness to want me to be alone or to be, you know, without the family? Do I need to be awake in order to achieve this? I mean, it is a little bit confusing thing for me and is a little bit sensitive, and I'm hoping for some guidance to either help me to really let go of this want or desire, or maybe something practical that can help me to achieve it. I don't know. It's just it seems to be one sticking point with intimate relationships that has impacted me in this life or causes the most suffering, let's say. The other things, as I say, in my life go very smooth. So I'm really trying to laser point and fix this one thing to help me to grow. I hope I try to express it as best I can but, as I say, in this moment I felt the need to say because of this lockdown and the more desire to connect, I feel so isolated right now.

Okay, thank you, thank you. So first I want to say that I want to thank you for this very heartfelt, very honest, full of integrity, and very courageous to come up in front of a big audience and to show this. So I want to commend you on that. It's a beautiful report. And if that is what your heart truly, truly desires, then of course my full, full blessings are there because you seem like a pretty sweet and nice man and I don't see why you should not get a sweet and nice partner as well. So my full blessings are there for that. One thing that we can discuss, if you like, is many times there can be this feeling of incompleteness without having a partner or a companion in that way to share our life with. Especially, you're right that especially in the times of the lockdown, many people have been facing this sort of isolation and sort of need to engage more in that way. So while it is completely understandable, my feeling is that while I have nothing against that process—and of course my blessing is again there for that—but if you can come to a point where you can feel a sense of completeness with your own self, with your own being, then it can also naturally happen that you become so full of so much light that many, many are drawn to you in this realm. But many times it can happen that as we are full of sort of a need, it can in one way or the other show itself and that can be a bit, you know, it can cause a bit of distance to be created because of that. So I just want to introduce you to your own being, which is so full of light and so full of its byproducts: love, peace, and joy. Everything that you need will come from it. Even if the perception—and ultimately this partner will be just another set of perceptions that will appear to you in this waking state—even if the most perfect partner appears, the feeling of love, the feeling of peace, the feeling of joy will not come from another. It will always come from your own heart, from your own being. So love your being in this way, love your self in this way, and you will notice that absent of a sort of feverishness, absent of a sort of chasing, you will notice that very organically, very naturally, these experiences of love, the experiences of joy, are naturally present for you for your tasting. They're made for you to taste. So about these phenomenal, about these worldly things, I often say that a human life, actually, although it seems very complicated, is actually quite simple. It's mostly about four things, you see. The four things are, like you said, about relationship and companionship. It is about security, secondly, about security and money. Thirdly, about the health of this body and the upkeep of this body. And fourthly, about the search for meaning and ultimately the search for God and freedom. These are the four variables that make up any life. So it's not complicated at all. Now what often happens is that many times we get into relationships, and relationships, you know, we have a way of becoming very central and very, very demanding on your time, attention, and focus. So maybe this is also a good opportunity for you to discover yourself before you get into something which is going to be so central in your life. And this recognition of your being, of yourself, is going to fill you with so much openness that even the relationship sort of troubles—it's not going to all go away, okay? I'm married. Your openness will help whatever relationship that does come around in your case as well. So use this as an opportunity to find yourself, find the highest which is already within you, so that you can be an even more beautiful partner than which is very obvious that you already are, but even more beautiful than you could be in that way. By the way, I want to end with a bit of a joke where in India there's a saying—I don't know if you understand, in India the saying is: 'Shaadi ka laddoo, jo khaaye woh pachtaye, jo na khaaye woh pachtaye.' I don't know if you understand Hindi, but basically, you know, it's the Indian sweet. So marriage is like the laddoo: the one who eats it regrets it, the one who doesn't eat it regrets it. So it's an open situation. I just wanted to end on a lighter note, but basically all my blessings so that you come across the most auspicious relationships and, but more importantly, my blessing so that you discover the highest, the presence of God within you itself. Thank you, thank you, thank you.

I think I knew the answer before I asked the question and it's: fall in love with my own being and use this time to reconnect with what's truly important. But I think I just wanted the open forum to ask and to receive your support, and it's hopefully reinvigorated my journey to do what's truly important. And for that I thank you so much. Thank you, thank you.

A beautiful meeting, thank you. Are you in a place with a lot of restrictions and movements and things, or things have started opening up a bit?

I'm in a country where we have the vaccinations, I'm in UK, but we're also in very extreme lockdown. And the truth is, we cannot change what's outside. So whenever it opens up, maybe I can journey that again and try that again. But things like this is really useful, I guess everybody will agree, because it gives some face-to-face—okay, it's over Zoom call—but these kind of things is very refreshing for me because I'm a very social guy and so I lack this connection with people at this moment. So things like this is really helpful.

Thank you. It's just like it touched me so much what the guy, my brother, just said because it's a little bit this—maybe in my mind is this search for realization. I must say, a little bit started of becoming so sweet, or like not so sweet, but like this—I would be like the honey that this relationship... because I heard it from, I kind of I heard it from Osho, I think I heard it there. So it just was like, maybe unconsciously, but this was really attracting me a lot. So this is a little bit, this has a lot subsided. But on some level this has been always a little bit playing. And thank you for this answer, it became like really clear. It's just one thing I noticed that even as you said something like, 'Yeah, that your light is gonna attract this,' so it's like a little bit divinely, it's like, 'Okay, now light is here, okay.' I just don't want to be in this state of expecting something or waiting for something or not being enough or something like this.

Yes, because you can't have it both ways. You can't say, 'I fully love myself,' you see, but, 'By the way, because I fully love myself, can I have a relationship?' You cannot trick life in these things. The light is like that half-surrender thing, that 'I surrender fully to you, but I'm surrendering with one eye open, okay? Because you better make this work according to what I have in mind.' So come to your own holy presence and then that holy presence will take care of whatever else has to be taken care of.

Thank you. Also, if I—when I have this opportunity, I would like to lay all my arrogance, my sense of specialty. It's like it's not a thought, but it's somehow I notice it's a kind of feeling. And also I noticed it's like on some level judging my sangha family, like, 'Okay, this one is more spiritual, this one is less spiritual,' even more and alone, good or bad. Yeah, basically that is being more spiritual better or worse? Ah, in my mind it's better. More spiritual is having more spiritual concepts? No, no, it's like more being absorbed in God, being more in peace. If I see somebody like super, like they're speaking so beautifully from such a beautiful insight, then they just radiate in peace. It's like somehow there was a tendency, yes, like partiality.

Is this one less spiritual, even more and alone, good or bad? Yeah, basically, is being more spiritual better or worse? In my mind, it's better. More spiritual is having more spiritual concepts? No, it's like being more absorbed in God, being more in peace. If I see somebody like super—they're speaking so beautifully from such a beautiful insight, then they just radiate in peace. It's like somehow there is—yeah, there was a tendency, partiality I would say.

Okay, yeah. Thank you so much. Love to you. And I don't—like many times I get reports from some of you saying, 'But I feel like I'm quite arrogant' and things, but I find all of you so sweet and innocent. I don't feel that. Okay, I feel we are done. Thank you.

I am. I am. I am. Not my emotions, not my race or religion. Not I am. I am. I am not my history, not imagination or memory. It's not my talents or my abilities. I was here long before they came to me. I am not my circumstance, not good or bad reputation, not my job, not my occupation. I am not. I am not. I am. I am. I am.

You say 'I am.' I say 'I am.' This 'I am' is not a person; it is consciousness. It is a godly presence inside each one. We must not use it foolishly. When you say 'I remember God,' it is the God principle in you that is speaking. You must come to know it as not personal but impersonal, uncreated, unborn, imperishable. It is the original one. To know this is to find freedom of God. To not know this—respect, honor this name that God gave you, the name 'I am.' It is truth, it is love, it is consciousness, it is God. Remember this deep within your being and be happy. Wake up.

Thank you all so much for being in satsang today. Love you.