Just Stay Empty - 17th January 2024

Although I painted a metaphor, the point is to take this very literally, you see. As much time as you will waste on 'me', that much time God will seem distant from you. Is it? But the point is not to be disheartened and say, 'But that seems too difficult,' because nobody can succeed at this 100%. We will smuggle in some passport-size photos of ourselves into the temple from time to time, you see. It will happen. And the point is not to beat yourself up by increasing that more and more with the 'terrible me' and 'unworthy me.' Don't make... at least one joke landed. So many times we do that in the sense we want to carry the 'me', the monkey on our back, through the gates of Nirvana, through the gates of Mukti. It is not possible. And the problem is that under the hypnosis of the spiritual ego, we don't even recognize that something is wrong. We feel like, 'This is the way I am coming to the truths, I am coming to awareness, I can be empty, I can be with God.' This 'I' has not left.

So really the question is: who lives in your heart temple? What is our life about, or who is our life about? And we must go beyond understanding; it must become literal, you see. Because you're not creating a library in that temple of Vedanta spiritual concepts of understanding. The library can come last.

It's very, very difficult. You challenge, Father. Like, first of all, you started with 'you are building a temple,' right? So there is 'you' already there. And then you are not even allowing a passport-size photograph. And of course, like, this is the... okay, you want credits for building the temple? 'Built by one.' Oh Father, then my father is not coming here, I am coming here. So who is struggling here so much, Father? And you are on top of that, you're saying nothing of you. How, where, what? Can't understand.

Beyond today's satsang is a bit playful. The other day was more serious.

One more question, Father. That's an answer that you will not answer, I know you will not answer that. So what is my place in this temple, Father?

It's... we went to Rishikesh. In Rishikesh, I had a room in a small, tiny ashram. And in that, I lie down on the bed to sleep at night, and on the fan it was written: 'Gifted by so-and-so.' For the fan! Surely that much credit we should get. Some of you saw that, you came to my room. There's been a whole satsang she's done. She starts all very seriously with all Kundalini and all that, but if one joke hits, she's gone for two hours. She's trying to...

So Father, not the credit part or not the post being, but while the temple has been built, there is 'you', right? Even if that 'you' is without that 'I', what is the core ingredient for the temple to be built? Can the 'me' really build it, or is it the absence of 'me' that is the temple?

So you have to do your absence. How you do that? It is in your absence that is the space, that is the emptiness. Because if it's full of 'me', then there is no room for God. And take it literally, because here your mind will come and say, 'What? Everything, even me, is made up of God.' And all this fancy spiritual knowledge will come, but it'll take you away from the true recognition of the One within. Nobody's ever reported that they were just self-obsessed—me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me all the time—and they were... has anyone said like that? So this you must build by removing yourself. So your being frees itself from the false identity. Who will do it? You. You are that. The false identity is what you take yourself to be. That one cannot build this temple. That one needs to be plucked out. And once that is plucked out, then we can see you built the temple. Consciousness built a temple for itself.

Who has not tasted the absence of identity for at least a moment? Anyone? We have many in the world, even if you don't go to satsang, you go to some tourist places, hill stations, lakes, to get that moment of not being burdened by the 'me'. 'I need a break,' they say. But they need a break from themselves. So in your absence, presence can be met. In India also, most temples, they don't let you in. They keep you there, and there's a separate compartment for God, but that is only where the priest can go and do the puja. Like Parth said to me, he'll meet me in the park, but he wasn't there, so I met him in his absence. Correct? You here only? Yes. Oh, any other difficulties now that I completely resolved that one?

That is a... it's a perennial one. It's a perennial one where even if for the moment we are empty of that, it will keep resurfacing. Just keep coming back: 'But what about me? But what about me?'

What is the rest of your life that you want now? All the options are laid out in front of you, isn't it? Before coming to satsang, maybe we didn't realize the two main alternatives, but now hopefully they are apparent. So what is it that you want? The life free of 'me'? 100% in God? 100% in God? Balance? Balance? No balance. The first... anybody here for the first time will get scared. Huh? Why is that expression? You can have that conversation outwardly. If we commit 100%, then our life may become 50% because Maya is still very compelling; it'll pull us in from time to time. So if you commit to keeping the temple empty of you, then sometimes you will still enter and that'll be fine. But if you decide to do 50/50, then no God is going to happen. You'll be struggling under the burden of the 'me' all the time.

Who's really scared of this? A life which will be lived in God's presence? But the scary aspect may be a life fully lived in His will, not living on my terms. So that which we are afraid to lose if we were to live in His will, those are called attachments, you see. So now you can relate to spirituality not just in the sense of, 'Okay, you must be free from this, you must not do this, you must not do that,' but you can actually see how it affects you, see? Affects your life moment to moment, you see. So what happens when we are deeply attached to something in the world? When the mind offers us a proposition about that, that seems compelling, isn't it? You're not able to leave it because we have given space in the temple for that attachment.

Father, when I'm praying, you know, sometimes I've noticed that... for the room also, yeah, yeah... like earlier when I'd go to temples, you know, I would never feel the need to ask for something because it felt like, you know... but it didn't feel like, you know, it's any... you know, that I want to ask for something. But now, you know, when it's as if like I know that God hears and grants, like almost like makes it happen, you know, when you really pray for something, I feel like God is, you know, listening. Then there's that tendency sometimes to just ask for something like in life, you know, just like, 'Can you look at that?' you know? And I've seen this, you know, and I just...

Very good, very good. So you know what happens is that children, when they are really small, then they say, 'Papa, buy me this, buy me this cricket bat, get me this thing,' you know, 'so please come.' Then... but after a point, they come to a particular age—and I'm waiting for that time with my kids—but after a particular time, you come to a certain age where the kids start saying, 'No, no, no, no, don't worry, I'll manage. No, no, I'll manage, I'll manage.' So sometimes we have to see whether our not asking for something, you see, is a sign of that pride that 'I don't want to bow down to God, and if I bow down, then I'm going to not ask for something,' or is it truly that we are empty? And what is the test of that?

Like there are many who decide not to pray for something, but they will spend hours worrying about it, you see. So basically they've taken the burden onto themselves and they're looking for ways to resolve it by themselves on their own terms, you see, rather than pray about it. So I feel like that's a good way to check. If we find ourselves in worry, better convert that time of worry into a time of prayer, even if it is about something specific, because then we retain our childlike innocence in some sense. Otherwise, many times it is our pride itself which we don't realize. Like many say, 'I don't ask God for anything.' I have said that probably a lot: 'I don't ask God for anything,' you see. But then, are you spending your life empty of anxiety and worry? But we must ask with the full faith that He knows best.

Good, good way to check. If we find ourselves in worry, better convert that time of worry into a time of prayer, even if it is about something specific, because then we retain our childlike innocence in some sense. Otherwise, many times it is our pride itself which we don't realize. Like many say, 'I don't ask God for anything.' I have said that probably a lot: 'I don't ask God for anything,' you see. But then, are you spending your life empty of anxiety and worry? But we must ask with the full faith that He knows best whether it is to be given or not, whether it happens or not. Then it is no longer our business, no longer for us to judge. So we must refrain as much as possible from any shows of tantrums or anger with God. Sometimes it's okay, a little childishness comes sometimes in us, so it's sweet. But you must not make a habit out of it: 'Oh, I prayed for this, You didn't make it happen.' Everything when we pray is His mercy, His grace; it's not an entitlement.

That beggar-servant prayer—why? It's more of an attempt of the lowering of the 'me' than a removal of the 'me'. And I'm trying to relate to what you're saying now.

Yes, because it's for the 'me' who remains after the removal. That better be kept low before the removal. Then all the inquiry, all the chanting, all the devotion, everything is to become empty of this 'me'. That is what we pray for more than anything else. Even when we say, 'Bless my heart with the light of spirit,' it is only possible when we are empty of ourselves. So all that is for that. But the beggar-servant prayer is to keep that ego in check and not reinvent itself into some spiritual superstar.

Should I do it or not? Yes, it's only after the removal. Then it's for this one that is resisting. This one that is resisting, that's who it is for.

Who is that one? Who is that one that wants to understand what is for removal and what is for keeping it humble? Who is that one? Not a rhetorical question.

Confusing. I don't know. Many confusing.

Okay, so anytime you're in confusion, it's very good, you see, because you must recognize where the confusion is and run from there. That means that you're in the wrong place, and over there nothing I say really will work. It's good, no? You notice that you're confused. Run—not from satsang, from that place. Because the mind tells you to run from satsang. It's too confusing. My absence is my presence. He who remains after I am not is the beggar-servant. Too confusing? Where this idea is, is it confusing in your nose? Where is it confusing? In your entire being it is confusing? It's not even confusing now. It's then what is it? No where? Don't you know anywhere? Your fingers? Nose? You don't know? Why don't you know? Where are you looking for the answer? Not getting any? But where are you looking? Are you able to identify like these aspects of our being? We must be able to look at now at least. We must be able to say, 'Okay, now here the energy system of thoughts seems to come and go. Here there is energy of emotions being felt.' These are traditionally called the koshas of human. A place like an inner shelf that you open—this top drawer, lower drawer.

It's not like that because where is this drawer? This drawer is this—can't say upper drawer. I didn't, I can't. In your whole being it's happening. Then where?

Just with patience, just look at that. It's obviously not literal like higher and lower, but you will be able to recognize the various aspects of your being. You see, this body is not the entirety of your being. It's just a shelf, to use your term. Every shelf—the shelf of thought, the shelf of emotions, the shelf of imagination, memory.

All the now thought came. I don't know which shelf it is. Okay, that shelf where thought came is mine, but it comes so many places where I sometimes think is the heart.

Okay, now wait for a thought to come from your heart. Don't—you can't plant it there, no matter how. Come by itself. The point is not to visualize. I hope you're not visualizing or imagining. You just have to notice. These are the natural mechanics of the human condition. See, the mind operates a certain way. We are all able to identify. Just look at your next thought that comes. Is it one thing that I think is coming from the heart? It could be. So what was it? Remember?

Was that if I keep myself humble, if I keep doing like whatever in the beggar-servant prayer, then God will take away the ego? It's not something that I can—so it's a prayer to get rid of something that I can't get rid of. And this I don't know where it's—

Don't. Next one. Next one. We have to notice these seemingly subtle things. They'll become obvious after some time. Because if you can't identify mind, we can't identify emotional sphere, we can't identify the feelings, the imagination, memory, where all these things are functioning—we must be able to see that literally. That which is perceiving all of this, you, is accessing various aspects of itself. Your body sensations—is it in the same aspect as your imagination, as your memory?

Body sensations? No. See, you notice them, no? So pain, hunger, stuff like that.

Exactly. It's in one specific. Imagine a tree or remember a beautiful time you had. You see, you can notice the different aspects of your being, isn't it? It's all one being, of course, but in the play, in the human condition, it has all these various layers. So the layer at which we experience these thoughts, that is the mind. Sensations or the imaginations. So we can say, we can make—like there's no actual thing like the mind. So based on our definition, we can say this is what I'm calling the mind. See what you're saying, because you can clearly make that distinction. You can tell the difference between emotional pain and physical pain. So this inner and outer—

Only I think even that only I'm not like the way you talk of it and the way I see it is the space is like common, but the inside thing is something that I have access to because I'm inside the body or I'm the body or—okay, we had this conversation. But if the body is like the glass, then what can we put inside that glass? Can we put something which is like what you're calling the inside? Inside this, like even a thought? No. Like you say that nobody has done a surgery to find anything like all these feelings. Even a thought—when we say we have a thought, no surgeon has been able to find a thought physically. It's not there. But as a body, I can—the inner something that I can't show empirically.

What's happening is that if you mix experience and intellect, you see, then you get stuck in the halfway points. Just don't be scared to leave your intellect, to leave your mind where you can meet what is being said.

This is also one of those things. I just have to be humble and God will show me. Maybe it's not something I can figure out. No, like yes, I just have to wait. Like not even wait, be empty or try to be empty.

The problem is the filter that we have created. So if you were like three years old and I told you, 'Beta, get me a pen from there,' then by the time you're five years old, you're just like, 'Why you want a pen? There's a pen lying next to you.' So this is the process of losing our innocence. In satsang, when we listen, we have to listen from like that innocence, just a childlike innocence, because this will not make sense to the intellect. And if it's making too much sense, then I'm doing something wrong, because the idea really is to transcend all of that.

So it is I should do that. Just be empty and somehow just follow like an innocent child. Don't make a position. Just at three years we decided, 'I'm going to listen to my father.' No, you don't have any of those positions. Can you tell me something to follow? I just follow.

When do grown-ups become children? When they become fully helpless. And when they are fully helpless, they run out of moves. No, Guruji says, 'Run out of moves.' Till then it seemed like a chess match between the master and the mind. Master: 'Become empty.' Mind: 'But I'm still there, how can I?' Next. Clearly there comes a point where we just run out of moves. Jump.

What you were just saying, particularly the last days, I felt what is really strongly in the way here is this deeply ingrained sense of responsibility for everything. I have to take over responsibility for my family, for my house, for this, for that, for everything. And even when I pray, I found myself praying for being able to take over the responsibility. Yes, a little bit sometimes, you know? But it's this tendency, and then from this I saw how deeply ingrained this is. And I'd really like to look a bit on this. I know it's nothing, but I thought it's a thought construct, but it's so strong sometimes.

Yes, and it's a huge fallacy. Fallacy in the sense that we don't know if we'll have one more breath or one more heartbeat. We don't know how to move a finger. We don't know any of these things. And if there was a choice between leaving responsibility to this 'me' or with God, who would you leave it with? So if your life becomes permeated just with God, who better to take responsibility? The one who is responsible for all of this. And don't allow your mind to categorize that and say, 'Okay, that is as far as spirituality goes, but as far as the worldly condition goes, then I have to take it back.' No. Handing over to Him, all can unfold from there. Hand over your body, everything to Him. Allow Him for whatever movement has to happen, let it happen.

Yeah. Sometimes there's also a thought: 'The only responsibility I have is to hand it over to God.' But it's also a construct. It's not—

As long as it's helpful in that way that it leads you to the surrender, it's okay. But don't think about it more. You come to me, and don't worry, we are here together. It's not like you won't speak more. You can speak as much as you want. So don't—and you come to satsang, don't pressurize yourself that 'I must ask all the right questions in time.' Anywhere in the world, again, with people pray anywhere in the world, I'm in anywhere to any God or anywhere—there I was just thinking like, you know, the one thing that's common is the head is bowed down. And then that words, I don't know, in our minds and hearts may be all different, but the head is bowed down.

How do you bring God to your relationship?

Yes, first bring to yourself, then you can't avoid Him anywhere. You're fully permeated with God, then relationship, work, everything. So you don't make efforts in your relationship. Don't make efforts. You have to make efforts in a relationship to be with God. It can seem like more effort when you're in a relationship. There are so many buttons being pressed, so many triggers, so many things happening, and the effort to stay with God and to stay in His love seems to be higher at times. Seen you be so, so humble and patient, and this is the example that I look at. It all has to come from His presence, His will. Yeah, the mind wants to carve out a separate like circle where it's about me and them. Maybe it can be like that. This doesn't work. Yeah, Kabir Ji said something very beautiful. He said it is only love when it is about God. I think Mother Teresa said something similar—I wonder if she meant the same thing. She said in the end it was only about you and God. Yes, exactly. And this movie is going to end soon. One of my teachers told me we live as if we are never going to die and we die as if we never lived. She said we live as if we are never going to die and we die as if we never lived.

Yes, Father. So is there a simultaneous letting go, letting go, and also holding on to God?

But letting go, letting go is the holding on. Letting go of the false is the holding on to truth. Actually, the holding on is effortless, but for a while it will seem like it is effort because to let go of the false feels like effort because our mind is convinced it is so true. You see, the world is so true, the people in it are so true, the relationships are so true, what they told me is so true. One lady, she went to Guruji and said, 'I can completely agree that I am not real, but I just cannot believe that my husband is not!'

Letting go of the false is the holding on to truth, actually. The holding on is effortless, but for a while it will seem like it is effort because to let go of the false feels like effort because our mind is convinced it is so true. You see, the world is so true, the people in it are so true, the relationships are so true, what they told me is so true. One lady, she went to Guruji and said, 'I can completely agree that I am not real, but I just cannot believe that my husband is not here.' Because it is designed to—this Maya is designed to seem real. And if there is something in this Maya that is even more so than everything else, it is relationships. For what a strange thing that in the human condition, when we don't have these special relationships, we feel that there's nothing I want more, you see? When we have these special relationships, there's nothing we want to run from more. That itself shows you that it's mental; it's a mental projection. And in all of that, God is forgotten or becomes a side character in the movie.

Not what you think, just follow. Still thinking about it? One child got very angry with me—I don't remember who it was—I said that all you have to do is jump without leaving your place. Just jump. Then he or she, I don't remember, got really upset with me. 'What are you saying? What is this jump?' What brings you to such something? Initially, your mind may have a misguided understanding that it is learning something, so let's go. But after a point, it will not want to come to satsang at all. You find every excuse, every reason to not come, you see? But still you come. What are you following then? Something deeper, isn't it? Something deeper that guides you. Okay, so this external one is just a representative, an instrument of that.

Not there, like a fresh, fresh game. Okay, not there. You play the fresh, fresh game. Fresh, fresh when you are here. Okay, I mean, and then what happens? The reverse Guru effect. Not like, 'I am empty till you look at me.' Something wrong with the eyes. That's a great one. 'I was just fully fresh till you looked at me.' Pointed, you go to look at him like that, eyes reverse. No, no, you can't lose that game. Then are we doing this? Are you doing? But you all become very good actors. Empty on the outside, solving world peace on the inside. Okay, come on then. One, two, three. Empty, empty, empty, empty. But your eyes have to be open, otherwise I can't check. Not like that, no. Okay, just empty. Let go everything.

The best thing is in that line, everybody says, 'Yes, yes.' Yes, that whole line, everybody says, 'Yeah, yeah, you got me.' You are the easiest witness. I am the one. Okay, come on. Fresh again. Empty, empty, empty, empty, empty. No sleeping, no meditating, no Turiya states, nothing. Stay, stay, stay. You can expect no. Okay, now my turn. Okay, let's go. Empty. Fully in the moment. Pure perception. Allow all thoughts to come and go. Nothing is important. Let it go and please keep looking at me.

The one who believes a thought will buy everyone dinner. What can order? Let it come and go. Would you like to own up? So now, whoever believes the thought—if you just allow it to come and go, the point is not to produce funny thoughts and interesting ones. Just let every thought come and go. But if you took it to be true, then expose it. Just say it out of your mouth and then forget about it. Honestly, your love makes it easy for us. Yes. Online, okay, come, come, come. Start.

See, it's a room full of sages. Not one thought is being believed in. So many. I'm the only one who is believing all this. That's the thought you're exposing. Yes. Huh, so empty. Huh, you can stop. I need to stay empty. This thought, 'I need to stay empty,' yes, as well. Please, contagious is an actual question. It's a hard question. Like the Satguru presence, you must this. Let's not count. You can have it. Let's not count it as okay. Come, come, come. That's a thought. I'm just catching my nose but empty, empty, empty. Not fully relaxed until exercise stops. Not fully relaxed until exercise stops. Yeah, start stopping.

Oh, it's yeah, whatever it is is meaningless, unimportant. Just let it go. It has no value to anything. You still exposing or no? Jealous? This is how you are all the time. 'I'm really jealous. Why is he in the room? I should be sitting down and all of you should sit up.' First thought you believe. No, no, a short time. But expose it when you believe it. Just expose something. That's a thought. Let it go. So much laughter was happening that people—yes, relatable joke, that's why.

Pure perception is easier at home.

Pure perception is easier at home? Yes, she's blasting all the notions of satsang. To look into the Master's eyes makes us empty, to come to satsang hall provides the support. Man has given up. Have you given up? Empty, empty, empty. Let it all come and go. Not believing any thought. The last ten minutes, you don't know what that—it's good, it's good. Just keep exposing like that. So just looking there, I didn't realize that. As I was saying, when the heart speaks, then pure perception is uninterrupted. But when the mind speaks, then you feel like you're somewhere else. You've lost track of where you are. So very good. I didn't realize that's it. Yeah, yeah, but at least now you're noticing that more closely. It's good. So don't leave pure perception.

I have to keep it.

I have to keep it? It's saying, 'I have to keep it.' The one that wants to leave it, wants to keep it. It comes as a gift. Comes only as a gift. In continuation of a thinker pose, but no thought is coming. Should something? I have a two-punch—one thinking about them. You have a two-part thought? Two-punch thought following. Don't think more about it because it can become a three-part. Yeah, and thinking about them, 'You're arrogant for saying that. I shouldn't have said that to him. Should I have said that?' Keep playing. My is yes, let them come and go. No thought is of any value. Unimportant, meaningless. Come and go. Yeah, let go, let go. Out loud, really? No, yeah, but only the ones you're believing. Good. Just a thought, isn't it? True or thought? Easy without thinking. Easy. That's the thought, yes. 'I shouldn't have sat in front today.' True or thought? Just a thought. Or true of it? I see that. 'How is so much love possible?' How is so much love possible? Thought or true? Hard question. Yeah, go. That's why I have that photo. True or thought? The best is and she's eyes also saying, 'One minute break.' Okay, break, break. Like break, break, break.

And if this is true, that you really exposed every thought that you believed in, or even if you expose one-tenth of the thoughts you believed in, then what's happening in this room? Easy or difficult? Block or go? No, no, just go. Ah, then like that, this free. No thoughts, no me. Yes, the exposing. Losing this now? Okay, but you're on a break. I didn't—I thought it would be disrupted that much. Who needs psychedelics? I've never been so high. I remember Dr. Ji was here first time we did this and she said after this exercise, she said, 'This is the first time I truly got a sense of what you're saying in satsang.' I don't know if she remembers it. This, you're like this all the time. Must be much more, much more. You can't do much more. Not all the time. Ask is still alive. The question now, what is it?

Yes, yes, exactly. I was saying on the how he says that the Mahamantra of the ego is 'What's in it for me?' and that this sense of me actually has this independent will to achieve this 'What's in it for me?' And even in this temple of God, again it's like, 'What can I do even for my enlightenment or my spiritual progress?' Exactly. And how this seeking can also be done through the mind, you know? And it's always me, me.

Exactly. Very happy you spotted that. That's very important because the mind takes charge of our spiritual search. 'What can I see?' and the outcome of that one. And its spiritual search is the spiritual ego; it is not freedom. It's important to let that one go. You can use that for pointer. Now, if there's a pointer that comes and it actually makes you empty, then yes. Trying right now, not tomorrow. Just one like—not like one pointer, something like that is okay.

I need to—yeah, all thoughts are just thoughts. I have a question. So where is thought relative to an unwanted sensation? I'm sure you're going to say all of it's thought, but it really feels like there's a disturbance and something doesn't want it, but I can't really spot the thought.

So the labeling of wanted or unwanted comes from thought. The space of Consciousness is very open. It doesn't care, like the room doesn't care what furniture you put inside. And actually, it is its own—in its own light that every sensation shows up. So why kind of saying like fear and desire is a thought? Notice if you ever had the same emotion, the same feeling, the same sensation twice. What happens is we end up labeling with these broad strokes like, 'This is fear, this is happiness, this is anxiety, this is joy.' But actually, you never experience the same emotion twice. Every moment, just like we will not ever experience this exact scene in the movie and we won't experience it ever again, every emotion, every sensation is also unique.

So in the mind's primitive sort of attempt to make it part of the narrative: 'There I was feeling fear, I was feeling excitement.' Guruji uses this beautiful example. He said that if you have stage fright and you are asked to speak on stage, you experience something, you see? You say, 'Oh, I'm so anxious, I'm frightened, this is fear.' But if you were going on a holiday and you were excited about it and you experience something similar, you say, 'I'm so excited, I'm so happy.' You see? Label it happiness. But in the energetic construct of it, it may not be that different, is it? So don't allow your mind to label the sensation. Allow the sensation to just be watched in pure perception, you see?

So in pure perception, what happens? It's not just pure perception of this, isn't it? It's pure perception of all the inner layers as well. Everything is perceived, but nothing is resisted. It's a full allowing. But the minute you label it as unwanted, or even if you call it fear, you are automatically limiting, resisting it in a way. So in the movement of resistance, no, there's no such. Even when it's being perceived, it's almost like the call—there's moments where yeah, it's back and then it can. Any sensation itself, can it resist anything at all like that? What is it resisting? It feels like resistance is its own movement. So suppose it's like constriction, it's like the something. What is it resisting? So how to make resistance out of a sensation? By taking a position, a mental position. Even the subtle is seeming. The mind may tell you, 'I'm not doing that,' but if you really notice, then you see that neither constriction nor expansion really makes a difference to you as Consciousness. But the minute we label it, then we are determining either a desire or an aversion towards that. And only when that label comes does it become a resistance. So ego and resistance actually are the same thing. And you're full allowing, no? And don't diagnose anything in your realm of sensation. Just don't know what it is.

Because sometimes I'm fully with you, but sometimes—I know, I know. Just to explain things, you need to use words. The stories you say seem so, 'Oh, I don't want X and X to happen,' but sometimes it doesn't even feel like there's a visible story, but there is things wanting and not wanting happening without a real story to follow. It's just like this prison of—and um, sometimes out of it, sometimes in it, and just this one is the spiritual guy, which is my arch-nemesis.

Which guy? This one who can say, 'This is what happens, this is what it is, this is what...' Leave all of that now. Don't determine. Don't determine the nature of anything at all. Yeah, yeah. So just let go everything.

But sometimes it doesn't even feel like there's a visible story, but there are things wanting and not wanting happening without a real story to follow. It's just like this prison of, um, sometimes out of it, sometimes in it. And just this one is the spiritual guy, which is my arch-nemesis, which guys this one who can say, 'This is what happens, this is what it is, this is what...' Leave all of that now.

Don't determine. Don't determine the nature of anything at all. Yeah, yeah. So just let go. Everything the mind wants, something to hold, it is struggling, wants some basis.

Yeah, always. It's exactly that time.

It's ultimately it's that only. The baseless wants bases constantly. So the human condition has become like this: that we want to make a stable structure out of this house of cards, you see? We want to make our conclusions, conclusions, conclusions. But somewhere we recognize it's all unstable; there is no truth in any of that. So allow it to be blown away. It can feel like, 'But I invested so much in these structures, in this understanding.' Now he's saying let them all go. I want to pick and choose. None of that. Don't leave your perception. Maybe that's a simple enough tool, because to go to the mind, you need to leave pure perception. But the pure perception is also 95% focused on visual perception, but it's okay. It's at least experience this world, which you're missing in the story of me. There you don't have to worry so much about, because I know that when you are empty and in pure perception, then your Self is apparent to you. Your being is apparent to you. It is naturally just apparent; you can't help it. Like if you... that's why I kept asking: pure perception, is it just these perceptions that you're witnessing? Even that which witnesses is apparent, but not as an object, of course. What happened to the one-minute break? Very happy. Back to normalcy. Whole line.

It's not apparent. It's like there's just a world, there's nobody witnessing it.

Are you witnessing it or no?

Yes, yes.

How do you know? Because it's apparent. That is the apparency, the non-objective apparency that I'm talking about, you see? It's not objectively apparent. You don't see like the world and the awareness hovering over there looking at the world. It's not like that, you see? But you are aware that it is I that is witnessing this world. That is the apparency. It's non-objective. The recognition of the Self is non-objective, and yet you recognize this. We have always known this, actually, that it is I that witnesses all these perceptions. It's like that. It's very simple. It's very organic.

One more question. So sometime back, maybe a few months back, you mentioned about the forehead part, sprinkling and going with the thought. You remember that?

I was just saying that if you notice that if you're thinking, thinking, your forehead just hardens up like this. So one tip is just to keep your forehead relaxed. Oh yes, this is true. I forgot, you see? The mind gives us oranges and we are just squeezing them, making orange juice, you see? You must not. You must let them come and go. Our face shows it. That's how we are able to do this exercise whenever you go for the exercise. And that's what I kind of do for... kind of you just block the oranges.

Yeah, relax and keep... don't make juice. That's all.

Orange juice. Don't make orange juice. Yeah, have it all wrong. Yeah, still like that. Still empty, huh?

Yes, yes. Exactly. Also very similar to, um, the exercise he's offering, directly watching us all. I'm laughing to not seem so scary. Stop it.

He's just thinking, 'Stop it.' In the garb of remembering what you say, what that... however, because I used to really pick on the word 'but.' Don't say 'but' anything at all. However, how many of you are acting good? Like, and I'm looking, and I'm looking away. Say, far do I noticed one time I was just going like this, like this, like this, like this. Then I could visibly see from the corner of my eye the change in... The K just came. He's like, 'What's happening?' Were you listening online? No, no. You... it's not... I was just trying to snatch a picture of you trying to not look like I was as... she... nothing has ever happened. I was expecting her to... you lost it. Jaws and head. Head is also... head has got a break. No, it's broken. I just... it basically all the in all the two years is... it's good, it's good. Two years. Just the thought, you know? I don't mean that question when I say 'thought' or 'truth.' It's just to get you to see that it's just a thought and leave it. The mind is not producing truth. Now she's going to police you all the time after so many years. That's why she got on the same... so she got on the same plane. Yeah. Are we still playing? Your perception was not interrupted. You tell him what you told... what you do your own thing. You do your own fresh, fresh, empty, empty. Awakenings are happening for... I know. Just like... you got the game. What is the game? It is fresh. Create, create a fresh thought. So what is the one you created? I also say that, no, actually don't let your mind beat you up with the same old stuff. Ask it to give you something fresh and new. Fresh material. Go you... police you stopped playing long... you were just pointing out the thought police. You were thinking that. So when I say the game is over, it doesn't mean we start believing. Just... I'm just saying don't have to expose it, but live like that. Live empty. Can we live like this? This is to create the space for God. This is to be empty for God. So this inquiry, prayer, all of it is leading to this. Everyone's got scared of me looking at them now. Earlier the complaints used to be, 'Oh, I'm upset because you never look at me.' Now it'll be because you're always looking at me. Anu's fresh thought is what? Repeat on loop. I'm trying to get out of it, but is there coming?

Yeah, just allow it to come and go. If you try to block it, it seems persistent to get out. It's reaching bullet officers with dealing with them. You have to be, no matter what situations, you know, we have to be empty.

Of course. Sometimes the situation seems so strong that we feel like we have to go to the mind now, but it's not true. That's when the hits the road. If spirituality or God's presence or to be empty was only useful in the Satsang hall, then that would not be true spirituality.

This exercise we did right now, um, this passing thing, normally now you're saying like you should continue to be in the space. My question is: should this happen organically or you have to put an effort?

What was the effort that was needed to make it happen now? When the thoughts were coming, not believing it—that was the effort. So that seeming effort we have to make. Okay, I said seeming effort is actually to pick up is effort, okay? But because our... that's why the whole porter example at the airport: picking up bags from the conveyor belt all his life, then you tell him to stop, it feels like that is effort. 'No, oh no sir, I'll help you. Don't pay me, I'll still help you.' So it's like the mind has been... fire still comes. So if it feels like effort to not pick up the bags, then make the effort. Then we realize actually that is the effortlessness.

Okay. Now, same analogy. I was saying that sometimes I already believe a thought and I was already out with that thought, you know? Like in this case, like I picked up a wrong bag. I'm just walking, you know? Like, um, again...

Yeah, don't pick up more bags about picking up the wrong bag. Okay? That's what happened. Like, 'Why did I pick up the wrong...' There, the next bag. 'How should I stop?' That's the next bag. That's... we picked up salad, now we're going for the seven-course meal. You return to the diet. Thanks.

So, um, this exercise, I don't have to give a preface. Um, it seems like between pure perception and then believing in a thought and then back to pure perception, there's like this invisible haze of sleep. And it's such a mystery, like, what is this going back and forth? It's not really me that's doing it, or my efforts. Don't understand.

It's... yeah, as it... don't make sense or try to understand the nature of anything. Don't determine anything. Yeah.

For, um, also what became apparent is, um, it's all or none. There's no in-between, which is what you've been saying in different words, that there's either room for one. So it's not like, 'Oh, it's okay if I think a few thoughts and I'll come back to this.' Any value in doing self-inquiry at that... staying open and that is... any point in still, you know, saying, checking, okay, you know, who am I? Who's...

Very good, thank you. So what... when we are empty, what, if anything, should be done? Let's broaden the question a bit. He asked whether it's all right to do the self-inquiry, or is it more helpful to do the inquiry when you're empty? When you're empty like that, allow your heart to guide you. The heart says, 'Who am I?' The heart calls the name of God. So that is to follow the will of God. When we are empty, then we can follow His will. Then we can't predetermine and say we must do that or to do that. Do this is to bring us to this point. So do the inquiry, chant, pray, everything. Have faith, be humble. All of it is to bring us to this point. Once we are at this point, then the true Master will tell us, the one who is in the heart. And the first time we did this, I was pointing out every second. So all the sadhana, all the prayer, all the love for God, all the inquiry, all the deepening has made the texture of this room different today after time has passed. So all this is helpful for us to remain, maintain God's light and God's presence. Your mind will come and tell you, 'But we can just always do this.' Can't we just always do this? Because it doesn't work that way. Because you make the cake, then you eat it. Like in the exercise, you're saying you build the cake and then you eat it. So in the same way, you make the cake with all the heartfelt devotion, heartfelt satsang, and then it seems so natural. But if you're new to Satsang or this was your first Satsang, then you may just be sitting there wondering, 'What are they doing? What are they laughing about? Why is he saying that this is the highest I've ever been without any external substance needed? What is he saying? We're not doing anything, we're just sitting and he's doing clap-clap. What's going on?' you see? So to even come to this point, it is Grace that brings us, and it is in a way the fruit of our love for God and a fruit of our dedication towards Him.