Are We Open to 'I Don´t Know'? - 24th January 2019

Like you said beautifully, I like these simple examples very much. The chair. 'The chair is comfortable.' But what is chair? And chair is like a piece of wood, or stick. So, you know, what is chair? Then you look at what is stick, and what is any of that is. So there is nothing that really we can say that 'I know this for sure, I know this for certain' and say, 'Okay, this is what it is.' And then we are not looking at things anymore heartedly. Looking at things and no sense of what I mean.

Well, yeah, yeah. It's just like because it seems like we got so used to the subtitles. So we got used to looking at a bit of the movie and there's a subtitle, and things in the combination, that is what it is.

Now you see these subtitles are actually not pointing to any substance. It's just an abstraction, like a set of concepts put together. 'Chair,' for example. So you see, when you start to see that these are not really relevant to what is, even to what is perceived, then you don't lose anything. You don't lose anything. You might feel like, 'But if I lose all these names, terms, labels, then I might lose my way to live, my way to function.' But it is not like that. And in a way, we can say that you don't lose anything, which is true, because you lose that which we considered it to be. And that which we considered it to be was never true. So we lose, in a way, the false.

Because, you know, this simply... even perceiving, you're not perceiving things. You're not perceiving the world. The world is also a label. You're not perceiving body. The body is still a label. What is body? The same way as chair. What is body? It is just a conglomerate of concepts. And like we all made up a whole concept, so it becomes very light, easy.

Okay, I'm noticing that this type of questioning, it's a little different from... same thing, but a little different from... for a long time I was just questioning 'I.' He knows I'm going to sit in this chair, but this 'I,' you know? So, and then that was very beautiful and powerful. And this is different. You know, I'm experiencing now as a little different and also very powerful. And also, of course, it brings back to 'I' as always at the end of it. It's like, you know, but I think I don't know. I just... I'm marveling a little at the difference because 'I' and the investigation of 'I' was so powerful for a very long time, and still now. But this is... there were some subtle beliefs hiding in all of these other little concepts that must have been hiding also in 'I,' you know? No, whatever, but yeah.

Yes. So what we would look at is that all conclusion actually is about 'I.' All confusion actually is about 'I.' Now, the sages have said that in this type of path, in this type of satsang, that there are two methods to come to the truth. One is self-inquiry and the other is surrender. Now, actually both are the same, and don't worry if that is still not understood. It is fine. Both are actually the same, very same thing, but they can seem a bit different in the approach.

So I would say that this surrender that we speak often, letting go, that is often misunderstood. And as we are letting go of these labels, notions, ideas of what we think things are, you see? So this is what I would call surrender. Surrender often—and it can start like that, it is fine—it is just like, 'I hand over everything in my life to you.' But if you really look at that, then what is that we are actually handing over? We look at that. There's a, 'I hand over everything to Thee.' It can start by saying, 'Okay, I hand over all outcomes to you. You make it go wherever you want.' But that is not fully the full handover. It is a good start. The outcomes are handed over. Then you might say, 'Okay, I hand over even all present actions to you.' What seems to unfold, not just outcome, but also what things are unfolding. Then we come to, from this, the outcome, then we are coming to and handing over the doing and the outcome to you. And that is also very beautiful.

But still there is even more that can be handed over. You see? Then, 'I hand over everything that I think I know. Everything that I think I know, I am letting go of all of this.' And then when we come to this point, then do you really know? Handing over, do you really know 'me'? You see? So to let go even these notions, then this is what I would call a true surrender. That now, nothing left. No, you will have no handing over left. Nothing to hand over left because I don't really know any of this anyway. So in the approach, and this is exactly the same as self-inquiry in terms of where it seems to lead us, with all these distinctions go in the self-inquiry as well. So whether we approach it this way or we approach it that way, it is the same.

And yet I have a clearer sense of what you mean because many times the inquiry can be just very uni-dimensional. It can become just like, 'I'm going to do this and this is going to be the result of this outcome,' and then, 'Okay, what is the state that I am like to you?' or 'What is my experience or thing?' Then that is my conclusion. So now I am this much. There may be some more inquiry. So it can become a bit templatized, as I would say, in that way.

So this is the more letting go approach. Yes, exactly. We're letting go of all our... actually, we're letting go of all our pride. Because to make the claim that 'I know what this is' is exactly like... and do you not realize that that is what pride is? We really like pride over... yeah, like that. But of course that is true. But really, fundamentally at the root of it, this claim to have a representation of what is being true, or the representation of isness in our mind, and to claim that that is true, is the birth of the ego. With the birth of 'I,' at the birth of any... the idea of every distinction is the birth of pride. It's the birth of separation. So it's very much a treatise would even... don't worry about that.

So then to be open, this means that are we open to the recognition that 'I don't know what any of this is'? Are we open to the recognition that now we might have versions of this? It's like looking at the Mona Lisa. Some may say, 'I am so sure she's smiling.' Some will say, 'I am so sure she's looking mockingly.' Some will say, 'I am so sure that she's quite dramatically...' you see? But what is she? Nobody can really see. And yet the experts will make their claims. So can you, when we see, come back to your childlike innocence? Or the Zen masters, they say, 'Come back to your beginner's mind.' You see? It means that stop this idea that you are an expert of our lives. And what is the expertise? To claim that 'I know what anything is.' Just don't know. And don't know that even that you don't know.

Yes, don't even make 'I don't know' a position. This for me is sitting there. What do you... you don't have to go that... I notice as I'm just moving through the world, you know, speaking actually, that's a... now I'm starting to see when I speak things, there's a believing happening just behind the words. Even now, you know?

You were looking at this here today. Who? Gunjan? Two weeks ago she said something. I don't know if it turned out like this, but this is how it's coming to my mind now. So she said something and I just pointed to her that we, once we have said it, you see, we seem to have this need to stand behind it. Yes, even if that thing just appeared. It just appeared, it came out of our mouths, a 'blah blah blah.' There's this feeling that, 'Huh, it came from here, then I have to stand behind it and defend it,' you see? And so whatever we're talking about, you also notice that it's like that. She never actually thought about it before, but it just comes out of the mouth and then we have to say, 'But...' And most problems in our so-called personal relationships are like that. If you look at arguments, we look at things, many times you're like... oh, now here we're not really going through that. So slowly we'll see that, 'Okay, now that I said it, I have to stand behind it and claim it to be true. You are like that, you are like...' then they can become the event.

And then the funny thing is that if someone else says something to us, then we are, 'How could you even think that about me?' So much trouble in relationships, you know? 'How could you even think that about me?' But you don't know what you're going to think next. All of this is so made up. I can tell you, stuff is just... and the root of all of this is what? The same idea. The same idea that 'I am able to represent truth in some way. I have my version, it's the best version.' The dropping of this too is to come to the beginner's mind, to come to the childlike innocence. What do you actually know now? Like, it is isness, you know? You know it. Even to say 'I know it' feels too much, you know? It's like an easing, you know? Each time I grasp for something to know, it's a scene and like, 'Oh, and yes, no.' Let go of even this concept of what 'is' is, because what 'is' is not dependent on the concept of what 'is.' So nothing can leave.

But if there is any attachment, even like a subtle one, to any notion that we have learned about, then that can... that pointer itself will start to feel like the truth or something like that, and we can become a bit scared to let go. So all of these now are beautiful pointers, but they're pointing to something which is completely wordless. And sometimes because the pointers have been so helpful to us, we feel like there's an attachment to the pointer itself. Yeah, no. But not that, you know, not that. The reassurance is that if it is true, it cannot leave you. Because all pointers, as well-constructed as they might be, are limiting. They are excluding. So even like 'being' and 'not-being.' When I ask this question sometimes, you say, 'Okay, so what can you actually confirm now?' The usual response is that 'I am,' because we've heard that over the years so many times and it can seem like a very valid response for a long time. Even I say, 'Can you stop being?'

So what is that? Even 'is' but there comes a time that even these like sacred concepts can be explored and say, 'But what is it to be? What is to have? Do we really know?' Yeah. And you'll see that all that we have associated with these terms now will start to show up and all that we're adding on, a basket of your so-called insights, yes, presence opposed to absence or something like that, these...

Many times, it can seem like a very valid response for a long time. Even I say, 'Can you stop being noisy?' So what is that? But there comes a time that even these sacred concepts can be explored and we say, 'But what is it to be? What is it to have? Do we really know?' You see that all that we have associated with these terms now will start to show up, and all that we're adding on—a basket of so-called insight, presence opposed to absence, or something like that. These kind of things, all of them will still have a reference to 'you' in one way or the other, even if it is not seen.

So it is in these expressions that you come to what Maharaj was pointing to. He said that the only truth that I can speak is that 'I am,' but ultimately even that is not true. Now I'm inviting all of you to leave the term 'ultimately' because that term 'ultimately' then becomes a sort of a deferral. 'I can defer this because he said ultimately.' So don't use that term. He was saying that even that is not true. Even that is not true that 'I am' because even in this, there's a reference to the 'I-thought.' Any reference to 'I' is what is meant by the 'I-thought.' So the primordial, primal reference to 'I' is being 'I am.' Most of you, are you with me?

So we don't have to hold even this conceptual reference. You don't have to hold even this conceptual reference. And if there is a non-conceptual truth to it, it is not going anywhere anyway, you see? If we keep hugging the concept of it, it is not it. And the truth of it cannot leave you anyway. I am trying to spell it out smoothly because this can get a bit confusing, you see? So don't make any reference to 'I' conceptually, mentally, even in the sense of 'I am' or 'being is' or something like that. You don't even need these terms. And if there is truth, then it will not leave anyway, because that is the definition of truth in Vedanta: it does not come and go.

So by your letting go of something, if the truth went, then that was not the truth anyway. If you forgot what remains is 'I am,' and if you forgot that, then if 'I am' actually went, then it was never true. And if you did not need that reference, then why hold on to it? So be empty of all references to 'I,' either 'I am' or even 'I am not,' being and not-being, because truth is not dependent on those references. So you may say beyond being and not-being is Brahman or something like that, but even these references we can just keep them aside. Don't look at any conceptual representation, otherwise subtle distinctions will start to creep in here. Distinctions start to come in. So, 'Is this emptiness? No. Is this Brahman? No.'

So you're no longer worried about them. Like we don't need a body or something, you're not worried about these concepts. You're not worried about 'What is it that I'm finding? Did I find this Brahman or did I find that emptiness?' Really nothing. For that, you thought in these terms. Now I will do actually... no, I don't know. What needs to know? Actually, we have never known. It's all been a big pretense. We have never known. We have neither ever known anything or ever known what it means to know. And yet that which is knowing is independent of this knowing.

I have a message which says the video's frozen. Is it like that? There's a question about fear as the recognition of our notions. Then the fear to everything that we are attached to, the fear of losing that can come. But that is why the masters have reassured us that the truth does not come and go. If it goes by you leaving the notion of it, then it was never true anyway. And the number one notion is 'me.' The number one notion is 'me.' So as you're exploring what is most known, don't give this 'me' a shelter. Because if you shelter this 'me' and then look at the motionlessness, then this 'me' will play as if it is a tiny object, very fearful.

But as much as you are letting go of the notions of the world, in the same way let go of this notion of 'me' and then you will see that there is no distinction, because all notions are actually given birth to the possibility of a 'me.' This manifest play will go on as it will go on or not. There's nothing that this 'me' has to do about it. And you know what the funny thing is? The funny thing is that in the play of this mind, we don't even taste the world. It's not that our mind has made the taste of the world better. No, the mind has not made the taste of this manifest existence better. It is also very blurry and insecure.

Until this, you see the world clearly. You hear different sounds and sirens, but you're not being controlled by that. Thank you. A few help now. My dear inspiration and blessings always with you, my dear. I noticed that she's there to stay back so we can do a bit of celebration together. To get to the ultimate concept is not to get to the truth. And to get to the ultimate seeming perception or experience is not to get to the truth. It's not about concept or perception. And the truth is not in opposition to anything, including concept or perception.

Question because... sorry, I have to go, train is not waiting for me. Okay, if you're still here, wishing you a very happy birthday. Have a wonderful, full, full love and blessings from everyone in the Sangha. May Guru Ji's grace always continue to guide you, to make you so beautifully open, and may this light shine through your presence to every being that you come across. Full love and blessings, Michelle. Full love and blessings to you. This little storm can be reminded in this way and vision how composite this 'me' is. It's a miracle. We read in the feeling of guilt and if some copies for all of us... well, once can get you have some copies.

Yeah, go to page 160 of this paper. At the end of 159, 160, 161. So yeah, listen to this. 'Whatever there is is called name-and-form. Wherever there be conception, there is loss. World yet, yet purchase and album the diva the amoeba kinji that be sankalpam the jaghana.' Wherever there be conception... when the sages say conception, it was conceptualization. Wherever there be conception, that verily is unreal. Whatever little of idea there is, that is the world, no doubt. 'Sankalpam me finish jaya har mainaivete gat salbum mana eva mahadibuhu.' What trace of ideation may be, all of that is not. Be certain of this: mind alone is the whole world. Mind alone is the great adversary.

'Manaiveti samsara mana avijaya ayam mana eva mahadukham mana eva jaratikam.' Mind alone is transmigration. Mind alone is the threefold world. Mind alone is great sorrow. Mind alone is aging. 'Manaiva hi kala matra mana eva malanjaga mana eva hi sankalpana eva hi jivakah.' Mind alone is time and mind itself tamed. Mind alone is will. Mind alone is the individual. 'Manaiva shatru mitram mana eva nijaika mana eva hi dharmakhya mana eva hi maya.' Mind alone is pollution ever. Mind alone is magic. Mind is itself illusion always. Mind is like the son of a barren woman.

'Mana eva hi nasti mana eva dridham sada mana eva hi jadam mana eva hi aham.' Mind itself never exists. Mind is itself inert always. Mind is very heat and mind is ego only. 'Mana eva hi bandham mana eva hi indriyam mana eva hi bhumi mana eva hi jalam.' Mind alone is great bondage. Mind alone is the inner faculty. Mind alone is the earth and mind alone waters. 'Manaiveti tejasa eva mana eva mahavayu mana eva hi akasha.' Mind alone is light and mind alone is the mighty wind. Mind alone is space. 'Mana eva hi sparsha mana eva hi rupam mana eva hi rasam mana eva hi gandham.' Mind alone is the nature of touch. Mind alone fabricates form. Mind alone is the form of essence. Mind alone is eulogized.

As you're going through this, read it in this way: that all of these are notions. See, when I say 'mind alone,' I mean that all these are just notions. The sheath of food is the form of mind. The sheath of vital air is the form of mind. The sheath of thoughts is the form of mind. The sheath of intellect is the form of mind. So all these sheaths of existence, as they're called in Vedanta, all of these are just notions to point us to a greater truth, but it is just mind alone. Even the ocean. 'Mana eva hi svapnam mana eva hi sushuptikam.' Mind alone is the seat of bliss. Mind alone is the waking state. Mind is verily the dream state and mind alone is the deep sleep state.

'Mana eva hi devadi mana eva yamadayaha mana eva hi akinchi.' Mind itself is the gods and others. Mind alone is a part of the Eightfold yoga. What little there is is mind only. Mind alone is full of mind. Because what is full of mind? This city, which is body, is full of mind. This being is full of mind. This duality is full of mind. 'Manomayam idam sarvam.' The species is full of mind. This attribute is full of mind. The seen is full of mind. This sentience and insentience is full of mind. 'Yat manomaya eva hi sankalpa matram.' Whatever there is is full of mind. That which exists as individual is full of mind. Thought alone is ignorance. Thought alone is different from vijnanam.

'Sankalpa eva hi sankalpa matra kalam.' Thought alone is knowledge. Thought alone is pairs of opposites. Thought alone is time. Thought alone is space. This is a miracle. Thought alone is knowledge. So whatever we think, whatever we think we know, is just a thought. Thought alone is pairs of opposites. So all duality, all opposites, is just a thought. Thought alone is time. Thought alone is space. So there is no way to explain that this has to become your insight: that time is just a notion, space is just a notion. Yesterday, tomorrow, now are just a notion. All of these are just notional.

'Sankalpa matram mananam sankalpam manah.' Thought alone is body. Thought alone is life force. Thought alone is contemplation. Thought alone is listening. 'Sankalpa eva hi naraka sankalpa eva hi svarga sankalpa eva hi chaitanyam.' Thought alone is hell. Heaven too is thought only. Thought alone is consciousness. Thought alone is articulation of the self. 'Brahmanatvam sankalpam eva hi.' Reality is thought only. The mantra is thought only. All that there is is thought alone. That is not... we're going to get to the last two. Thought alone is consciousness. What the sage is pointing to is that 'consciousness' as the label, as Brahman, is just a notion, was just a thought.

So this is what we were speaking in satsang all of satsang today. I feel it was about this, either contemplation or inquiry. Thought alone is contemplation of the self, you see? Even that notion that 'this is truth.' Like, okay, let's go further than experience. Reality is thought alone. Brahman is thought only. Now this might cause confusion to the Vedantin, you see? Like, most of it is saying all is Brahman, but sometimes the sage says Brahman is thought only. So this is again what we were talking about today. It was exactly this: that what is true is not dependent on the notion of it, you see?

So the intent or the feeling behind the sage sharing like this is to get us to let go of the notions of it, even though it might be the highest notion that we can conceive of. And it's good to notice. Look, here it comes sometimes because these are the things that we hold on to like a sacred notion. Then you feel like if a sacred notion goes, then some truth will go along with that. But then if it can go, then it cannot be truth, you see? So the notion 'Brahman' is just a notion. Does it exist at all? The term 'Brahman' is just a thought. The Absolute is just a thought. Self is just a thought. And in you, if any of that...

Even though it might be the highest notion that we can conceive of, it's good to notice. Look, here it comes sometimes because these are the things that we hold onto like a sacred notion. Then you feel like if a sacred notion goes, then some truths will go along with that. But then, if it can go, then it cannot be the truth. So the notion 'Brahman' is just a notion; 'existence' is a thought; the terms 'money' is just a thought; 'the Absolute' is just a thought; 'Self' is just a thought. And you know, if any of that is true, then it is not dependent on whether the thought is there or not. But notice the attachment of the spiritual seeker who has held onto these as the ultimate truth, but at best they were pointers. So now when the invitation is coming, leave it. We'll leave everything, even our most sacred notions. I don't mean the story; just leave your sacred notions and keep everything else. That is not the invitation. It's like leave it, leave it, leave it, including what you think is the most sacred or the most truthful.

Thought alone has consciousness. Thought alone is even contemplation of the Self. The true reality is thought of only, and Brahman is thought of only. So when we look at what is the greatest, some said Brahman. What is the highest thought you have? The Absolute. And then what is the lowest? Someone said 'time' on that, and why that has to be the lowest? But suppose because it's trivial, easy. So we're saying exactly the same thing: the triviality is thought only and Brahman is thought only. So in a box of intellect, we can only go from this lowest to this highest, whatever we might conceptualize that to be. Now the invitation is, or the provocation is: leave both sides to reality and Brahman. Various notions, then what? Then there is a thought only, and that is not ever.

Nasti nasti. Varshasankalpam nasti nasti. Brahman nasti nasti nasti nasti. Shurbeevas heart is not, not alone. The three worlds are not, not indeed. The Guru is not, not at all. So too is the shishya, the disciple, who will be not. Nasti nasti. Shed hi dam sure nasti nasti. Manicotti nasti nasti. Bikam chipar nasti nasti. Luncha gar. The body too is not non-existent, not is not, it is non-existent. The mind is not at all existing, never even a trifle is not, not ever. It's like nothing ever is. The whole world is not, it's not. Nasti nasti. Babutham lab nastiness. Let me show you her. Selvam nasti maya. The beings indeed are not, not indeed. Everything is non-existent indeed, no doubt. Naga, this chapter titled 'All is Not' is revealed to you by me. Whosoever hears this even once, he becomes Brahman himself.

So hear this. This is not this auditory hearing. It could be, though. The peace of mind attained by the Phoenicians, acknowledged by the longing for the lotus feet of moon-adorned Lord, by divesting oneself—moon-adorned Lord is to be—by divesting oneself of the bondage called the forest of transmigratory life comprising one's dear consort, sons, and their own attachments, the renunciation and such spiritual practices. Even an occasional meditation on Shiva's feet cannot be achieved by shrewd logic or vociferous scholarship. Even an occasional meditation on Shiva's feet cannot be achieved by shrewd logic or vociferous scholarship. For those years in whom the endless phantasmagoria of the world has subsided and who abide without evil, there are no states of waking, dream, and sleep, and no life and death as well. This concludes chapter eight, a dialogue between Ribhu and Nidagha, entitled 'Determination of the World Being Void and Non-existence of All' in the sixth—I'm sorry—entitled the 'Shankara of the Shiva Prasad.' So this was chapter eight of the sixth portion of the scripture called the Mystery of the Mystery of Shiva. And by the way, this chapter is the same chapter as one of the heads landing on that chart. So I would say, actually reading chapter eight, I would say that it's up there with chapter twenty-six in terms of its potency and destructive capability.

Chapter nine. So very interesting in the beginning last night. The Athenian Guru snanam kalam. Bernardito others for me. Sunita God is asking Nidagha, 'O revered master, but where do you perform your sacred bath? What is the mantra for ablution? What is the auspicious time for ablution and for offering of holy waters? Please tell me.' I am Brahman. This certitude alone is the great ablution. Aham Brahmasmi. The path in the Self is the great ablution, the daily ablution, and not anything else. I am Brahman; this certitude alone is the great ablution. Aham Brahmasmi. I am of the form of the supreme Brahman. I am the supreme bliss. I am of the form Brahman. This conviction indeed is the profound. Aham Brahmasmi. I am only of the form of knowledge. I am the supreme alone. I am of the form of peace only. I am without any impurities. I am of the form of the eternal only. I am simply the permanent. This indeed is the supreme Brahman. I am Brahman alone. I am only of the nature of everything. I am the leftover. All this is very Brahman and Brahman alone.

Thank you all so much for being in satsang today. Satguru Sri Mooji Baba. Guru Kripa Kevalam. Could someone share the exact title along with the translation and author name? So this is the Ribhu Gita, the first complete edition with English translation, transliteration, and original Sanskrit text. This is the one available from Ramanasramam. So anyone who goes, this with the cover is for reference. I feel like I've seen this on Amazon also at times, but it seems to be much more expensive. At the ashram, it is available for 200 rupees, something like this. So the ones who keep going to Thiru keep getting it for the Sangha here. If you're not able to find it, because this is, I would say, highly, highly recommended. So if any of you are not able to find this and you would like to have a copy, let us know and send us your address and we'll make sure and ship it to you. Okay, very good.

All guys here, let's see. Is it your camera work, my dear? Did you leave? Look at those sleepyheads. It's super cold there now. Look at that. You can turn the camera also to everyone. Happy birthday, my child. All my love, all my blessings are with you, and hope you have a wonderful day today, full of grace, full of joy, full of fun. So great, so good. Be sure to eat some very nice cake and all, and hope to see you very soon in Rishikesh. All love to all of us. Is anyone else's camera working? Yes, can you unmute? Oh yeah, look, you see it? Yes, we see it. I'm just going to move so we hear you as well. Tell us, what is this? Where are you?

I'm at my mom's place actually, like always in Germany, and it was not supposed to snow really. The weather forecast said no snow. It's really important for me, so I thought I really want snow to happen, and then it just happened last night. Just some small things.

Small thing? A blizzard! I don't want to see what a big thing would be. Really impressive. Think of snow in Buffalo and that happens, and then we'll be impressed. I'm so happy to see the snow, though, because I've never seen it except in Dubai. Dubai has this indoor... are you going to sing now with the family?

Also show us her place. She said it's very beautiful. Shana is in Colombo, Sri Lanka, close to Colombo. Alright, I like this. Let me unmute. Can you hear me? Yes. So if you're reading the scripture, okay, advance. Or maybe you stepped out of the wire. Very good. Are you having a nice time?