Just Fail, Completely Fail

Now, when we feel like failures, when we feel like we have not succeeded and or something has not gone wrong, we are looking… it can be a natural reaction that we look to find ways in which we can feel a bit better, escape that kind of situation because it feels too sticky. So how do I come to some sort of stability and then jump back into this - we can have a strategy like that. If that feels most natural to you in your heart then that is completely fine. I would say that use this feeling of guilt, self-doubt, I am not worthy, I am not good enough, I have wasted my opportunities - use these ideas as a fuel to the fire of your Self-discovery. That doesn't mean that you have to stop chanting, keep chanting it is very good. Whenever it feels natural you can also just check because actually what I am speaking of is not in time and it is really not even about that one with the report. You see? It is not even about that one in the past. Not about that one which seems to have all of this history and all of these things happen. I am speaking to That about That, which is independent of any of this. You see? And that one actually is never blocked. The lady before you was saying that ‘It can seem there is a block coming, because of all these feeling that I have...’ nothing can block... all of this is just manifest experience. So, that which is Aware of all of these feelings constrictions, of the story of the past, guilt, failure and preferences that ‘This is what I want to do and what I don't want to do’ that is also perceived. So let go of that. Don't take any preferences so seriously that ‘Now I just want to do this or now I don't want to do that.’ So just let yourself go fully from that and check that, that pure Awareness is aware even of these words. That is your true nature. For that there is no difference - Master to Master, practice to practice, all of these things are just changing images on the screen. And really I am not even telling you what to do aeer Satsang, I am just saying for right now. The best use of Satsang is right now because you are here, is to see what you really are. To come to discover of your Self which needs no prerequisite. If you are full of emotions you can discover yourself. If there is no emotion showing up you can discover yourself. If your mind is full loud you can discover yourself. If your mind is empty you can discover yourself. You see if your body is fully in pain you can discover yourself. If you are full of pleasure you can discover yourself. No prerequisite is needed. Just the simplicity of this is astounding. And everything that is showing up, everything that is showing up, nothing is in opposition to your discovery actually. So the only (and I have said this oeen) the only thing that seems to get in the way, is your notions of what you think you are right about, what you think you know and what you think you don't know. And I am happy in a way that all of this Holy Fire is burning for you. Which will burn all of this, like I told you when we talked that I see a return to innocence happening, I see a return to innocence happening. Let me see if I can still see it. [Smiles] Yes, very much, it seems like there is a sort of an end of a bad dream is happening. You are just like 'phew' and unwinding of all of these positions and things and in this just let go... don't determine this or that... this is better, this is worse... just let go... won’t you like to let God run your life for a bit, isn’t it? Then you don't decide no. Let God decide. Where should I go? Which Satsang is best for me... this is what I feel to do, this is what I don't feel to do. Which will help me most? Leave all that God's problem. I promise you one thing, God will not choose badly, God has not chosen badly also. All has been pure Grace. All has been pure Grace. What would you do if you did not have to take any of these calls about your life. Like not determine it has been good or bad or worth it or not worth it or your progressed or not progressed and also you didn't have to determine what your future plan of action looks like; even if that includes that I am going to drop all plans. Even that is not your call, suppose none of it was your problem! [Silence] [Chuckles] This is the exam you pass if you get all the answers wrong. You see? I feel like you are passing. So when you say for example that ‘I picked up wrong ideas or I just failed at all of this.’ Good no, we have to fail completely! You see? The more and more right we become and then what can happen is that, I notice at least with this expression that it ‘Just shuts up, it just shuts up’ because if somebody becomes very right then maybe there is not enough energy here or whatever it is, I just bless them. So it doesn't seem to flow in this way to say ‘Oh you think all of this is about being right, may Guruji bless you my child.’ What happens is that there comes a time when we realise that all we thought was right and all our endeavours and all of that; it can seem like it is all gone to waste. That which mind is claiming as waste is actually beautiful. It’s beautiful. If you are looking back at your, at the city which is burnt down and wow that is my spiritual story and it is completely burnt to bits now and you say wow that is terrible and I did such a bad job. For me that is pure fertile ground of openness, pure fertile ground of openness and lack of righteousness and so it touches my heart deeply. So let everything be burnt to the ground. Don't even have the strength to say ‘This is what I feel is good for me’ because you will get back again in same trap of thinking, you think what is right. Just fail, completely fail, half way failure won't do. Fail hopelessly, become the most hopeless case and then don't even pick that as a position, let go of even that. [Silence] I am very happy with my diagnosis, I feel like, I am seeing you so open and so fresh and so beautiful. I am very very happy. This holy fire burns all, everything that gets in the way you see. [Silence] Just leave it! Just leave it. Just leave it. Except ‘Just leave it’ leave everything else. Do you feel like something still comes in an attractive way which says ‘but yes all this is fine but it is still true that..’

The first and last step in spirituality is to leave right and wrong, good and bad; to leave all these opposites. Notice the impulse to rest on a conclusion and I notice that you are letting that go and it is beautiful. So, just like that, that is the de-addiction. Something will come, something will say… whatever, it can even be ' Okay, now I have taken enough time..’ don't rest on that, nothing is your problem. That is life, this is life. Such a beautiful adventure. Basically, it is just a wonderful discovery that nothing that I considered to be true in my head, actually is the way I thought it was. We can have moments where we feel we have a handle on life, this is what this one is, this is what that one is - all of that is just made up stuff. Nothing is the way we think it is, especially right and wrong. Am I right about this or wrong? [Laughs] Exactly… don't bite into the apple. Nothing is ever the way we think it is and nothing is ever missing. If we feel something is missing then we are only looking at the wrong place. If we feel something is not right then we are looking at the wrong place. Truth can never go missing.