God Is Now
The voice in the mind is not proof of a separate self; the ego is a mythical idea that cannot be found through perception, and the belief it must be destroyed is itself the ego.
Even though it`s obvious that everything is coming and going and I cannot be what is coming and going...it`s like I cannot swallow this.
This is easy actually, easier than you may think, because you don`t have to believe it, you don`t have to be convinced by it. It doesn`t maZer what your mental posiHon is about it. You see? So, allow it to be. Like, it will push this buZon, that 'Do you really know that everything is coming and going? Can I really say...?'. Forget it, don`t know, it`s fine. You see?
It`s more like...even though there are no thoughts, basically during satsang mostly, and throughout the day it happens gradually that there are less thoughts coming and then it suddenly starts. SomeHmes, when there are during satsang no thoughts and there are just sensaHons seen, it`s like...it feels like it`s not resolved. This is probably the most true I can say, that even no thoughts are here, I can see these sensaHons appearing in front of me, but it`s like 'I don`t get it', but not on mental level, that I don`t get it on mental level, but it`s like...
Where else could you not get it? [Silence]
Yeah, it`s just a thought. Yes, yes.
You can just laugh at these thoughts.
I usually do, someHmes.
What does anything mean? [Smiles] [Long silence]
It doesn`t mean anything. But I must say, like, when there are thoughts, kind of 'No thoughts, ok, empty, empty, empty, space, space, space' – thoughts coming, ok, seeing 'This is not true, this is not true – space, space, space, I can relax''. This is kind of happening here.
What does that mean? [Smiles]
Hmm...
I can be this direct with you, because I feel like you had good insight. Now we can speak directly. So, the mind will propose that there are Hmes 'open, open, empty, empty' – of course, without this commentary – like that, and then [demonstrates a worried expression], you see, and the mind may propose an idea of oscillaHon, not done, not fully seZled, not enough, all of this. You see? But the mind doesn`t know.
It`s like, when the thoughts are here it feels like, someHmes, the work has to be done for, to be empHness, to see clearly that they are unreal. Yeah.
Yes, but the work cannot be thought about, isn`t it? The mental dilemma is very common in Satsang, that 'Does it take effort to come to the effortless place?' And, yes, at Hmes it feels like it is effort. And, the guidance is clear, like Bhagavan [Sri Ramana Maharshi] said, as long as it feels like effort to remain empty, make the effort. But if you`re gonna think about making the effort or not making the effort, and whether you are being the doer about it or not the doer about it, and how much doership to pick up, and all of these things, then that is just adding to the mental stuff, you see? So, either we do or we forget about it. But don`t think about it. If it feels like a doing to remain empty, of course it`s not a doing. Of course it is effortless to not pick up, most of you I have told you enough examples about the conveyor belt and even the sushi, where to not pick up, just effortless. But yes, at Hmes it feels like it is effort to just stand like this or sit like this. And, during those Hmes, make the effort. But if you are going to add the concept of effort and effortlessness on to the conveyor belt also, and you start picking up those [you see], then that is not helping [Chuckles]. You are with me on this? It can be a bit subtle because the mind is proposing to you that if you are truly free then you would not need to make that effort. You see? But who is the protagonist of that story? The same guy [Chuckles]. [Silence]
Is it then even important to be in this empHness, because... or...I don`t know...
It`s fine. The absence of noHons is the conceptual empHness that I am talking about. That`s all I`m saying. Because the noHons are not represenHng anything well. Why would you hang around with that which is not well done to put it very simply? If you can have beZer friends, why have terrible friends [Chuckles]? That`s why I said that if the un-interpreted is a higher truth, then why step down into interpretaHon? [Silence] Don`t get caught up in any conceptual version of empHness. And any conceptual version of anything. If there is an empHness that you understand, throw it away. And, especially if you have a plan to be in it, throw it away. Just throw everything away. What you cannot throw away, live with that [Laughs]. [Silence] SomeHmes what happens is like it can become an idea 'I have to be in the empHness', or, 'It`s okay not to be in the empHness'. Throw both of those posiHons away. The one that is the aspect of your Being that is having trouble with this – don`t worry about that aspect of your Being [pauses]. What about the rest of you, how is that doing?
The aspect, like, the idenHty, it`s not here right now. And, if it is, I know it`s not real.
Yes. Yes. Very good. So, that aspect which can have, like, a conclusion about anything – just leave that aside. And, what about the rest of you?
I`m happy.
[Laughing] That`s it! You need to be that simple. My driver, you know, he has this unique problem. If it gets late at night, then he has to stay back here because on the way home there is an empty playground where it`s full of dogs at night and nobody can pass. They are just ferocious, sort of. So, how can he be happy? - 'Don`t go to that playground!' [Chuckles]
But it seems the playground comes to me. It`s not that I choose. It comes to me. And then, someHmes...yeah, it gets messy...
You hear the 'woof, woof!' it can`t really come to you, but you hear the 'woof, woof!' - 'I have to deal with these dogs...' No, you don`t. [Chuckles] I am suggesHng a great escapism, no father’s ever told their kids: Just you hear the dog, you run. [Laughing] I`m just messing around a bit, but it`s not too far from what I`m saying.
It`s like, I know that one sangha sister has told this, someHmes it happens like a plan of le^ng go, 'Okay, I`m gonna just not serve this false idenHty, let them pass...', and this also somehow gets me involved in this.
Yes. You have an infecHon of the checker guy, which will use everything that it hears in satsang and says 'Ah, but this is like this, and that is like that...' Just, forget it. [Silence]
I wanted to say `Forget what?' But... [Laughs]
And the checker guy would say 'Are you really forge^ng all of this? Or are you just saying?' [Laughing]
Thank you.
No resoluHon, no conclusion, nothing. [Silence] If there is one playground where the dogs are barking, you focus on the rest of your Being. That`s it. [Silence] Be careful of the spiritual dog. It can have a very holy sounding bark. But it bites really badly.
[Someone in the room] Barks like 'Hallelujah'. [Laughing]
You remember, last Hme I was saying 'Don`t try to understand that which you would not bother explaining to your squirrel'.
Yes, I remember.
Even now, your mind could be going 'But, this is not my problem actually, I don`t know who are you talking about, I do not have these problems'. [Laughing]
Yes, someHmes it can.
You see, we have just all the problems there are. If there is a problem, it has to be this one, there is no other problem actually. You have to know something to suffer. If you don`t know anything, you are just happy.
Thank you, thank you.
Key Teachings
- The inner voice is not proof of a separate self—just as a frog's voice wouldn't make you a frog, the voice in your head doesn't prove an entity exists
- The ego cannot be found through perception or concepts—it is a mythical idea with no actual existence, yet we keep looking for it as if it were real
- The belief that you must kill the ego is itself the ego—there is no separate entity to destroy for liberation; the seeker's search between ego and Self is a ping-pong game between concepts
From: God Is Now - 11th April 2019