God Assisted Life or God Dictated Life

It's also coming to me to share some thing about, Guru Kripa Kevalam. The key word there (in a way) is Kevalam, which means ‘only is’, only the Masters grace is. So the term kevalam signifies that. That is a huge disHncHon because I realize that most of us want Master’s grace so that Master’s grace can help us. So we are looking for a Guru-assisted life. But the minute we start to feel like it is a Guru Kripa Kevalam, which means that it doesn't maZer what we may have wanted, what our plan was… Most spiritual seekers they start like this, they will say I am suffering, I need some help, I want to become beZer or I want my life to become beZer. So they want assistance. So they are looking for a God-assisted life. But the minute it comes to the point of giving up the ego, giving up their sense of ‘me’ who God was supposed to assist and the minute it is realized that the more you dive in to spirituality, it moves from an idea of a God-assisted life to a God-dictated life; that's when the trouble starts to happen. You feel like running, no? Because many didn't bargain for this. We just wanted … we heard that, there's a great super power, super natural which can do everything and if you just surrender to it, it will help you. So what can be a beZer deal than that - if all I have to do is ‘Om Namah Shivaya, please help me’ [Gestures with folded hands in prayer] and the greatest super power in the world comes to help you, the greatest force in the universe, in fact the light of the universe is available to help you, that is a fantasHc deal. Who not want that? But the minute we start digging deeper and deeper into the Truth and we start to see that the sense of individuality, the sense of separaHon between myself and that greatest force in the universe is just noHonal and it is not here to help 'me' but it is more assimilaHng it's enHrety into its Self. And you start to… in the phase that switch is happening where you are moving away from individualized idenHty to idenHfying with your Reality, the drugs of this individuality will completely fear the noHon of a Grace-dictated life. So surrender goes from a facade of a way to get some great assistance from this highest power in the universe, to really le^ng go of every idea we may have had about how this life should go. And that is when the rubber hits the road! That is true surrender. So to accept that this life is not just God-assisted but God-dictated, in fact it is God itself which is leading this life. So what happens in cusp between ‘I am leading my life’ and ‘God is leading my life’ - in the ‘I am leading my life’ we have the idea that God should assist it and then when we start to see that as our surrender is deepening, we are seeing that there is no real disHncHon being felt, but actually there's a fear coming that but now I have to give up on every righteous noHon that I have about myself and about how my life should go. And I have to completely let go to the will of the God, to the will of the Satguru, to the will of grace. Then many of us feel like... we don't say it in these terms but really there can be a fear of it becoming a God-dictated life or Guru-dictated life. And in any case, in India maybe it is a bit easier to handle these things but in Western culture of course the idea of something dictaHng our life can seem very very contracHng. It can seem almost repulsive. This whole idea that I have to give up this independence to God or God forbid a Master. It’s a very scary noHon in fact, this whole idea of Master is very scary in many culture. Because it signifies not Master and devotee, not Master and beloved but Master and servant. And the idea of servant, although we may like the idea of service, we don't so much like the idea of servant, that can be a very scary idea. This is the crunch Hme of our surrender, because it is very easy to talk about surrender and it is very easy to talk about a spontaneous life without planning and allowing everything to unfold. All that sounds very nice, but the minute that unfolding or that spontaneity is squeezing our ego out of us, then it is seen as it is not just a customer support that we are calling and saying ‘God help me' [Chuckles]. But that which you are calling for customer support is actually now taking over our enHre life. There can be some sense of wanHng to run. So this Guru Kripa Kevalam implies that everything is God's grace, everything! So everything is being dictated in our life by God, by Grace, by Consciousness. So when speak about Truth for Truth’s sake, that is what we are talking about. When speak about surrender that is what we are talking about. It is not something has to come, the Master's job is to come and help me, but the Master's job really is to show you your Reality, show you what you really are. And during that process your will let go of your individual idea and idenHty about yourself and that process of le^ng go for some comes very easy. For those with the devoHonal temperament it can seem like very easy. Some of you hearing this will say 'God-dictated life that sounds amazing’ and some of you may be feeling that pinch. Some of you feeling that pinch saying that 'No, no, I am happy with God assisHng me, as long as He is my assistant, I am deciding the plan, it should go here and that He should help me to get there and He should help me with peace, with joy, with love, [you see] He should carry me so kindly to my plan'. But the minute it is said that ‘your plan’ is not really a good plan, you don't really know how to plan. And you don't have to worry about planning. So where God will carry you is also up to God. That can seem a bit shaky. Because then anything can happen and we open ourself to the great unknown. So when we say Kevalam, Guru Kripa Kevalam that is an invocaHon, a pledge in a way of a great surrender, which means that whatever is the will of our own divine presence, let that will be done. So, fundamentally whether our mind likes it or not, whether we go screaming and shouHng or we go openly, it is only that will that will be done anyway. Because that is, all there is, anyway. But in this play of that saying ‘what is’ it seem like it can only seem like we can determine like an inner a^tude towards this and that inner a^tude of openness makes it empty of suffering and that inner a^tude of holding on to the false idea of separaHon, can make it seem like it is suffering.