Do You Have To Be Convinced About Your Existence?

Show me a confused heart. I want to meet a confused intuition. So any confusion then must be where? Only conceptual. Any problem? The intuition has some problem? Is for intuition, is there a practical world or in the minds words a ‘real world’? Does it have this category? That does it divide life in these ways? ‘Oh, the right way to do in Satsang is like this, but the right way to do in the market is like that and the right way to do with my friends in the bar is like this and…’ does it have, does intuition have these categories? It’s very alive, very fresh, spontaneous, very fresh. If you had a magic lunch box, which is always full of food. You may finish it but automatically it just refreshes, it's just full, full again. So then would you go around looking for food? This is but that is symptomatic of our lives when we have not really visited our Intuition and we relied so much on the mind because the mind is always grasping for solutions and answers. First, it makes up these make-believe problems and then it solves them. It is like most of the viruses, computer viruses [Chuckles] By the end of this whole, there was a whole period where computer viruses were a very big thing. So by the end most of the antivirus companies were making the virus. So their business could still be there-Make the problem, convince you of the problem first, and then say ‘Ah, this is what you need to do to solve it. Do like this, do like that. This is not good, this is good.’ All this nonsensical solving of non-existent problems in the mind, what is the problem that your heart has?

Yeah.

Yes, yes, so stop, stop! To spot it just to stop it. Spot it, to notice it is all that you need to do, is all that you can do. What else will you send in there besides…? You notice something, you see that it makes you suffer, drop it. The mind's idea that you will be lost without it, the mind's idea that you will be lost without it and that therefore these popular categorizations of which the mind itself makes that ‘All this is alright for Satsang and your spirituality but you need ‘me’ for the ‘real world’. There is a big bad world out there and you need ‘me.’ I am your best friend. You can't do without me, me, me’ like that scene in the movie, Revolver. Mind’s voice ‘me, me, me, you cannot do without me.’ What is the trouble with dropping into the heart? What is the trouble?

Yeah, but you switch out of the false, switch the false off and then the Truth is apparent. You do not need to switch on the Truth. It is so beautiful, no? It is looking, it is like you've been looking out of your front door, waiting for God to come. All you have to do is close the door and see what is already in your house. It is not that God has to appear, Truth has to appear, Self has to appear. Nobody has ever lost the Self, even the seeker is built up on the Self itself- ‘I am seeking;’ is built upon ‘I am’ and ‘I am’ is built upon ‘I’ So the Truth has never gone anywhere It is just that we have been looking in the wrong direction, with the wrong instrument. Are you still trying to convince yourselves of something? Conviction is just another name for belief, a strong belief is called a ‘conviction.’ [Silence] And there's no belief which you can guarantee or hold on to. But try what happens when you're empty. How many are still waiting to be convinced? Only one day if I convince myself ‘I am Brahman’ as Ribhu-Gita says, I just have to read it fifty five times to be convinced that ‘I am Brahman’ then I am free.’ Does not work like that. You do not have to do any of that actually. Do you have to be convinced about your existence? Do you have to be reminded about it? Just exist and ‘do you have to be reminded?’ Now this is a bit subtler. Do you have to be convinced that ‘it is your existence’? I exist? It is naturally you, no? Isn’t this apparent to you? Not in your heads, do not try to understand it. But isn't your existence apparent to you and that it is ‘your’ existence, you that exist, isn't that apparent?

Your head cannot do this. Try to make your head understand existence. There is a whole branch of philosophy called ‘ontology, metaphysics’ which is trying to figure out existence for thousands of years, they made no progress, zero. Every idea has been refuted and the refutation has been refuted. Cannot do it with the head. So just because we have invested a million dollars in our head do we want to continue to invest whatever else we have also on that? Just to try and make that investment work out? It is called ‘good money chasing bad money.’ So when you realize your mistake, you must stop. I have tried to make it work this way. I have tried to find myself this way. I have tried everything, I have tried inquiry, I have tried chanting, I have tried all hatha yoga, I have tried every type of practice there ever was. I do not seem to get it in my head but I have moments of clarity where it is the ‘no mind, no head’ But the no-head is possible right now. Nobody can force you to go to the head or believe the head. Attention can still go, it's okay. What thought has to come that Consciousness then has to bow down and say ‘Yes, my master you are the Truth’ what thought has to come like that? I make these extreme illustrations to show you what actually seems like ‘Oh, this thought was so strong, it got me.’ You reported that, all of you reported that in the past ‘this thought was so strong that it got me.’ But what are you really saying ‘I as Consciousness had to bow down to this thought because the thought was so strong. It was bigger than me at that time and I, as Consciousness, had to bow down.’ Because the power of belief rests only with Consciousness. It cannot belong to a person who does not exist. So when Nisargadatta Maharaj used to say ‘Integrity is very important, integrity is very important’ what did he imply? He meant that admit that in you as Consciousness there is an aspect which still is interested or wants to play in that playground of whatever the mind is trying to solve. Whether that is relationships or money or freedom or body or whatever, whatever the playground may be and check for yourself who really is interested in that? What difference will it make to your Reality? [Silence] What actually will change about what you truly are? And you notice that all these nurtured conditionings from the past which seems to then have a gravitational pull for these thoughts and identities starts to go away. But don't say that ‘I am forced to believe my thoughts.’ Because the one who could be forced does not exist and the one that is, is too big to be forced. The one that could be forced, like they could be the mind, could be strong and say ‘Oh, yes, yes, yes you are the voice of the Truth. Mr. mind you are speaking the Truth’ that one doesn't even exist like a grain of sand it is not. And the one that Is, the one that does exist- I Am, Being, Consciousness, I Am-ness, what can force that? So, what to do when this attachment comes into your light? Just by coming into your light, it starts losing its power. It may be losing its power. But, if you feel like it’s still potent, it makes you dance every time it comes, then either surrender or inquire. Either you surrender it if you are of devotional temperament, surrender it and say, “Not my problem. It is my Master’s problem or God’s problem.” If not, if you don’t feel like surrender really applies in your case, then inquire- “Who is suffering from this? Who wants this? Who is the protagonist of this story?” So many pointers have been given to you, thousands and thousands over so many Satsangs. Use any of those tools and inquire into it until the notion becomes laughable. It should become laughable. But most of you, I have to say, that you’ve been in Satsang and I feel like you can just notice it and (gesture of it disappearing). But it’s not a competition. Like don’t have an idea of yourself as a very super advanced spiritual seeker therefore you should be able to see and just blow up parts like Terminator or something. You don’t have to get to some super advanced level. Just go with your intuition about it. If you feel like just your noticing now doesn’t take the juice out of it, doesn’t take or the sting out of it, then inquire or surrender. What I’ve said now is basically the encapsulation of, if you can call this a path, starting from Bhagavan,(Ramana Maharishi) then that is the encapsulation of that path.